


we own the sky

by jacinto



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Power Rangers, Power Rangers (2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, An Oblivious Lesbian, And A Ball of Bisexual Angst, Buckle up, Canon Compliant, Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, F/F, Featuring, Friends to Lovers, Gen, HRH will make teeny tiny cameos but I'm not gonna tag them properly, Hogwarts Professors, Mutual Pining, POV Alternating, Slow Burn, all navigating the Disaster that was Hogwarts in the 90s, and Tommy later, and the students that were there during the time of the books, between our two girls, characters from MMPR and the other PR series make appearances and serve as secondary, expect to see, in regards to the HP universe, picture it this way: this story was happening in between the pages of the HP books, so we will tag it as, there is so much plot and I'm not sorry, this runs right alongside the canon timeline, we go from Goblet of Fire all the way to the end folks, we operate in the grey area between, with their band of boys
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2020-07-19 03:46:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 59
Words: 274,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19967515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jacinto/pseuds/jacinto
Summary: At the end of their third year at Hogwarts, Kim finds herself approaching Trini after a Quidditch match. It's a brief meeting; a spontaneous moment in time that holds the promise of something bright.With the wizarding world on the brink of another war, life both beyond and inside the walls of Hogwarts soon begins to change in ways they never could have imagined. And through it all, in navigating teenage shenanigans, finding new friends, and eyeing the stormclouds looming on the horizon, they're faced with a decision:Watch idly as their world is overtaken by the dark?...or resist?





	1. Prologue

"Watch where the fuck you're going, bitch!" Trini yells, craning her head in the direction of the green blur that nearly just knocked her off her broom.

The offending girl bellows at her as she passes, "Bit harsh, don't you think? Should really let a girl know when you're gonna be diving at her like that, Tiny!"

Trini scoffs and they continue playing.

.

The Hufflepuff team flies towards the ground together, landing and patting each other on the back. Their Quidditch season is over, and it's bittersweet.

Trini hangs back on the pitch for a minute as her team walks ahead of her towards the changerooms. Craning her head back, she sees the Slytherin team still celebrating high up in the air.

And as her eyes are drawn to the movement of the people in the stands, she tries her best to etch the view into her memory: the stadium full up of students and staff set against a beautiful spring day. There's nothing like this feeling—being part of something and _loving_ it so completely. The Quidditch pitch is her favourite place at Hogwarts.

With a little nod to herself she enters the cool dark tunnel that connects the pitch to the changerooms. Lets out a breath. Though the loss stings a bit, their plan had worked—they delayed the match ending long enough to pull ahead of Ravenclaw in the Inter-House Cup standings. They needed to score 90 points in their match against Slytherin today, and nobody seemed to think they would even get that many.

But they had; they'd succeeded in robbing Ravenclaw of third place, which is the best her team could ask for given the circumstances—Ravenclaw beat them by a very wide margin in their match earlier this year, entirely thanks to a lucky Snitch catch.

Whoever said Hufflepuffs couldn't be a tiny bit petty? It’s incredibly satisfying, she has to admit.

Doesn't mean she wants to stick around, though.

There will be plenty of time for hanging out with her team later tonight. For the moment she's making a beeline for the changerooms, eager to peel her kit off and get back to the castle.

"Hey... HEY! Tiny Puff!" comes a shout from well behind her.

Trini vaguely recognises the voice but keeps walking through the empty tunnel, bracing for the expected vitriol that's about to be sent her way. Slytherin just beat them 290 - 90, after all.

"Will you just… hold up, please? GOMEZ!"

A girl with long raven hair pulled back into a sleek ponytail comes running around in front of her, slightly out of breath and looking windswept. And not in the way that Trini is sure she herself must look, given the both of them just stepped off the pitch.

No, there's something... different here. Something that forces Trini to remind herself to breathe.

Because the energy in the air around her shifts; she feels it. And it's older, maybe. She tries to put a word to it, to classify, to define, but all she can think— _feel—_ in this moment is something like... reverence?

And Trini is struck by it; sure that she's never even talked to this girl before, who, with her Quidditch robes slightly askew and her broom gripped in hand, seems to be both sounding every alarm in her mind and quieting her every anxiety all at once.

Trini feels her eyes soften a bit of their own accord. 'Cause god, she's gorgeous.

_Wait, no. Ease up on the Gay, Trini._

She brings herself back to earth and lets out a small sigh. "Can I help you?"

The girl opens her mouth then closes it. Nods. "Right. Well... I wanted to introduce myself. 'Cause I usually only let my friends call me 'bitch', you see," she says, smirking at Trini, her eyes twinkling with something that's somewhere between cocky and sincere. Maybe it's both.

She gives Trini a little wave then holds out her broom-free hand to shake. "So hi, I'm Kimberly Hart. Pleasure to meet you, and sorry we nearly collided on the pitch."

Trini quirks her eyebrow slightly but takes Kimberly's hand, each of them still wearing their Quidditch gloves. "Trini Gomez. And nah, it was my bad too—I dropped quick to avoid that Bludger. Was you swerving that prevented us from crashing together."

There's a stout pause. Kimberly smiles then rocks on her feet slightly.

"You were really gre—"

"I better go chang—"

They both stop abruptly, each huffing out a small laugh at having spoken at the same time. Kimberly discreetly shifts her weight backwards and grips the back of her neck with her hand, lips parted, head bowed just barely; looking at Trini with uncertain eyes. It's incredibly endearing.

_Trini, nO._

Tipping forward again, Kimberly takes her hand off her neck and vaguely gestures in Trini's direction. "I just wanted to— erm, you were really great out there today," she mutters, then seems to collect herself, straightening her spine a little. "I didn't realise what you lot were doing until you hit that ninety-point mark and, like, completely switched up your strategy."

She pauses for a heartbeat, blinking rapidly a few times. "I mean, it was like playing a different team — when we took that timeout there, I checked the IHC standings and it clicked."

A small smile pulls at the corner of Trini's mouth as she slouches a little to the side. Like she's acquiescing. "Well, when you're competing for last place..."

Kimberly scoffs and shakes her head quickly. "Don't. It was a smart strategy that worked, and you carried your team today," she insists, then her eyes widen slightly and her hands become more expressive, as if she's trying to get Trini to understand. "You were everywhere? Like, one minute I'd think you were way over on the other end of the pitch, and the next there'd be a very well-hit Bludger sailing towards my face."

Trini laughs lightly. She really _does_ need to go change, but it can wait a little bit longer. "I _had_ to. You scored eleven out of your teams fourteen goals... you're aware of that, right? Or is there another pretty girl on the Slytherin team who wears the number fourteen, has your last name on their robes, and looks exactly like you?"

Ah, shit.

_Smooth. She's going to think you're hitting on her._

To her surprise Kimberly just beams back at her and appears completely at ease. She tips her head to the side, smile devolving to a smirk. "Well, someone's gotta score. My squad's made up of idiots more concerned with playing dirty than with _playing_ at all. In the first two years it was manageable—the team was different. This year, though..."

She trails off, frowning. "It's getting to be a bit insane."

Trini blinks a few times and fails to keep the fact that she's _seriously_ impressed out of her voice, "You were on the squad in first year?"

And Trini vaguely remembers, of course — hard not to, given Slytherin only had one girl on their team back then, too. But it's different, reconciling that vague memory with the very real person standing in front of her. Talking to her now, so much at ease.

Kimberly shrugs by way of confirmation. "I'm born in February so I never get the 'youngest person to do whatever’ title, though. Don't worry. Keeps my ego in check." She smirks, then pauses—a smile begins to tug at the corners of her mouth and her eyes glaze over, as if she's recalling a memory. "But I've always loved Quidditch. Been playing since forever, so I had a bit more practise coming in than most kids, I guess. Nowadays it just feels nice to be above the world, you know? Not have to think about anything but the match for a little while. It's… freeing — I don't think I'll ever get enough of it."

Trini's eyes soften and she smiles at her, trying to communicate that she understands. She's taken aback at Kimberly's honesty, and on a whim she decides to share a little bit of herself, too, though it’s the last thing she would usually do in a situation like this. "I fell in love with Quidditch completely by accident," she begins, then pauses. "Knew I wanted to get involved in something extra-curricular and I was into muggle sports as a kid, so I picked up one of the school brooms in first year and started messing around."

Kimberly's watching her with unreadable but… bright eyes, and Trini takes that as a good enough sign to keep going, voice coming out softer, "After a year of coming down here to the pitch nearly every day, it became the thing that freed me, too." She gestures vaguely, trying to insert some casualness into her posture to guard the vulnerability in her words. "Even better, I realised I was _good_ at it. Tried out for the team at the start of second year and the rest is history."

"That's quite the happy accident," Kimberly mutters, smiling warmly down at her.

Trini shrugs. "Guess it's the things you don't see coming that tend to have a way of turning your whole life upside down, right?"

Kimberly nods, seemingly to herself. Breathes out, "Yeah."

"T! Everything okay out here?"

Cedric Diggory has his head sticking out of the Hufflepuff locker room at the end of the tunnel, and even at this distance, the look on his face is unmistakably saying _'I will throw down if she's bothering you'_.

Trini sends a fond smile his way. "All cool, Ced! I'm coming."

And with that, she inclines her head to Kimberly slightly then steps to the right around her, leaving a wide berth between them that's probably a little unnecessary. Kimberly's body seems to unconsciously mirror her own, pivoting on the spot to follow Trini with her eyes.

Trini spins around and walks backwards. "It was nice to meet you, Kimberly Hart."

Kimberly smiles and inclines her head in return. "And it was nice to meet you, Trini Gomez."


	2. I'm Not the Sun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/6oycfVHOyXvfH1e7PiqKZX?si=FelweLKNSBaErblWYcMJHA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Trini wakes to the shrill sound of her alarm clock blaring from her bedside.

Murmuring curses under her breath, she rolls over and smacks her desk a couple times before finding her mark. Grunts, "Christ," into the still, calm quiet that follows.

Rolling onto her back and rubbing at her face, she wills her eyes to open.

At once, her pet Kneazle Sabre gets up from where she was curled up near Trini's elbow, stretching lavishly. Steps up to stand on her chest and stares with brilliant green eyes, moving so there's but inches between their sleepy faces.

"I'm up, I'm up," Trini murmurs, voice coming out in a croak. Runs a warm hand over her fur, threading fingers through the golden orange, tracing one of the thick black stripes on her back. Sabre _meows_ at her and hops down off the bed, making her way over to the open bedroom door then slipping through the gap with a swish of her tail.

Not a minute later, Trini's nearly drifted off to sleep again when there's a loud _BANG_ and her eyes snap open. A pattering of little feet across the carpet heralds the arrival of two very small people, who proceed to climb up onto the bed with some difficulty and body slam her in the next moment. With the action her old down duvet puffs up, offended at the frenzied movement that's so much out of place in the easy silence of the early morning.

" _WAKE UP!_ " Enrique yells in Spanish, rolling back and forth on her legs. His outstretched hands smack the duvet as he does so, sending tiny white feathers floating up into the air.

" _We have to catch the rubbish, Trini_ ," Dante stage-whispers, bouncing up and down on her stomach.

Trini grunts, reminding herself that they're only _seven_ and fighting the urge to throw both of them off of her and onto the floor.

After a moment of deliberation she settles for putting her entire hand on Dante's face and pushing him back lightly, leaning back into her pillow to avoid the little hands that shoot out in an admirable but ultimately unsuccessful attempt to poke her.

Her dad appears in the doorway, cleaning his glasses on his faded wool jumper. " _Up, honey_!" he says, smiling at her and briefly pinching the bridge of his nose. Scrunches his face up, certainly sleepy himself. " _Portkey's at quarter past five. Boys, go eat please—there's toast and jam on the table_."

At that Trini sits up, shoving Dante off proper and onto the empty space of bed beside her. There's a _whoosh_ as he sinks down into the duvet, and after sitting there for a few moments, the dread she associates with the effort of waking up in the morning gives way to something much brighter.

Because her brain seems to catch up with the rest of her as she remembers where they're going: the Quidditch World Cup.

With an energy buzzing through her akin to how she feels on Christmas morning, she jabs the twins both in the ribs a few times playfully before scooping Enrique up and swinging her legs over the side of the bed. Runs her fingers through her long, wavy brown hair with a huff, teasing at the tangles gently.

" _Come on boys_ ," she mutters, putting Enrique down and grabbing the clothes she laid out the night before from where they're draped over her desk chair. With a wave of her grey beanie in Dante's direction, who still hasn't made to move, a little spark of a teasing kind of warning flicks on in her eyes. " _Get to eating!_ "

Dante hops to the floor and scurries after Enrique, Trini chasing them out of her room lazily as they go. As they make their way down the stairs to the main floor their laughter lingers, carrying through the house.

Trini showers and changes with haste, dashing around her room with jerky, half-decided movements and muttering to herself before grabbing her rucksack off her bedroom floor. If it weren't for the Charm it would be heavier than usual on account of the camping supplies, but with the magic assisting her she hauls it up just fine, shouldering it and starting down the stairs, steps slow due to the different distribution of weight, conscious of the increased risk of losing her footing spectacularly in a slapstick, shoe-to-banana-peel kind of way.

She’s learned from experience—this particular set of stairs has worn carpet made flat and glossy by constant use and has, on many occasions, taken advantage of her inattention in the past for its own amusement.

Trini sighs as she grips the bannister with her left hand. For some reason, nobody else in the house seems to have this problem.

Arriving safely on the main floor, she yawns behind her hand, hiding it out of politeness for nobody but the old picture frames dotting the walls; a force of habit. Propping her pack up next to the front door, she turns around and strides the narrow hallway, tight wheezy _creaks_ tracking her progress over the honey-coloured buttery hardwood, past the front room on the right and into the small kitchen at the back of the house. Following the smell of fresh coffee like it's beckoning her personally.

Three windows look out from the kitchen into the back garden, off-white paint splitting in creeping cracks here and there around the frames, a result of years of sun and rain buffeting the exterior brick and radiating inside. It's still entirely dark out, making her feel like they're all having a spontaneous group snacktime in the middle of the night.

And the four of them certainly tried to get to bed early, but the excitement and anticipation meant that she didn't sleep as well as she would have liked.

Trini pours herself a cup of coffee and pops a slice of toast into her mouth before laying food out for Sabre, who's begun winding around her legs in a tight figure eight. " _Bun, uncle Javier is going to be here over the next few days to take care of you, okay? You be nice to him_."

Sabre looks up at her and _meows_ in a kind of way that suggests begrudging compliance at best, and their Golden Retriever Kwanza comes trotting into the kitchen, tail wagging; no doubt choosing to get out of bed on account of the distinctive food sounds floating through the house.

" _I know_ you'll _be nice to uncle Javier, Kwanza_ ," Trini mutters, opening the cupboard with his food bowl in hand. She tips downward to fill it, one leg lifting up and paralleling the floor to offset her weight and prevent her from doing a faceplant. Pats him on the head, stretches her neck a little.

A quick look at the clock on the wall tells her it's quarter to five.

Nodding to herself, she walks around the table to sit down for a moment, ruffling Dante's hair affectionately on her way. The twins sit there cramming toast into their mouths, washing it all down with glasses of milk in great gulps, jittery in their excitement.

She leans over and swipes her thumb over the bit of rogue jam on Enrique's cheek, licking it off. After a deep, steadying breath in and out, she takes another couple bites of her own breakfast.

Her dad comes thundering down the stairs with a tattered duffel bag in hand and a large rucksack on his back. Placing them next to Trini's at the door, he speeds into the kitchen and glances between Sabre and Kwanza. Nods once and pauses, pivoting on the spot and looking around with his hands held out in front of him like he's scanning the area.

" _Dad, we're okay_ ," Trini says softly, finishing up her toast and draining the last of her coffee.

He looks over at her and smiles, pushing his glasses up on his nose and taking a deep breath in and out. " _Yes, yes. About time we get going, I reckon,_ " he mutters, beckoning to Kwanza and leading him out of the kitchen to let him outside. Trini smiles back and gets up from her chair, ushering the twins out and towards the front door.

They both sit on the bottom of the stairs and start to tie their trainers up carefully—Dante with his tongue between his teeth, having only got the hang of it in the last couple months—preparing to leave as Trini pulls her denim jacket on over her grey hoodie and laces up her boots.

" _Alright kids,_ " her dad says, walking into the front room with Kwanza on his heels. He turns and pats him on the head fondly then comes over to them, stepping into his own boots and waving his wand to lace them up. There's a ruffling sound of worn canvas when he pulls his duck coat on, and he looks around at the three of them with a small smile as he zips it up halfway, tucking a lock of damp dark hair behind his ear. The shorter strands at the front are nearly past his jaw, and Trini makes a mental note to offer to trim it a bit for him before she heads back to school.

She mirrors her dad and pulls her own rucksack onto her shoulders, and with one last uncertain glance at the dark house, he grabs the duffel and ushers them all out of the front door. Once it's locked up the four of them walk a bit down their long, packed gravel drive.

" _Up you come, monkey_ ," Trini mutters, looking down at Dante and holding her hands out. He steps forward and she hauls him up, where he clings to her front like a baby koala, blowing a raspberry on her neck. She nips at his ear by way of response, complete with growling noises, which earns her a light little laugh from him. Her dad holds his hands out for Enrique to do the same and he's soon situated as well.

Trini takes her dad's hand in a tight grip and he looks down at her with a smile. " _Ready?_ " he asks.

" _Ready_."

" _Hold on tight Ricky. Dante, you too_ ," her dad says. With that, he nods once and turns on the spot to Disapparate.

And Trini's pulled into a familiar squeezing blackness, body constricted on all sides for a moment before they reappear on the outskirts of Black Forest in Sussex, a mere few miles south of their house.

The darkness is different here—grainy, almost, as they all peer about—given there seem to be no dwellings or man-made lights for quite a ways. Trini reaches across Dante and draws the collar of his jacket up closer around his throat to shield him from the air, which isn't uncomfortable in temperature, really, but _smells_ cold due to the setting. It's all ancient wood and moist soil; more forgiving under Trini's boots than the lawn outside of their house.

Her dad kisses Enrique on the top of the head and pivots around, squinting in the darkness for any sign of where their Portkey might be. Trini looks about as well, rubbing Dante's back absentmindedly. He hops off of her and takes her hand when they start along the edge of the forest, with her dad checking his wristwatch reflexively as they walk.

When they haven't found the Portkey after a few minutes, he takes his wand out and raises it into the air. A set of green sparks erupt from it, travelling upward and exploding above them like a firework on mute.

" _Are we going to catch the rubbish, daddy?_ " Dante asks quietly, looking up. Green lights dancing in his curious eyes.

They all wait, watching for a few moments—the playful sparks lingering too long to be anything but magic—before her dad hums. " _If we don't see anything from the others, I'll just Summon it to us. Don't worry, sweetheart._ "

But ten seconds later another set of green sparks erupts against the inky black sky, only a short way further in the direction they'd been walking, and Trini smiles at the sight. Something like a content kind of ease tickles her heart, radiating warmth that spreads from the top of her head, down her neck, and across her arms.

Her dad smiles too and they speed up, soon spotting a group of nine people standing at the top of a grassy hill with the clear night sky surrounding them on all sides. The sight of their silhouettes set against the stars pulls a vivid memory to the forefront of Trini’s mind: a trip her muggle class took to the London Planetarium years ago; experiencing this same feeling while standing surrounded by the sheer vastness of it all, dreaming of everything that existed _just_ beyond the sky. Juvenile, enraptured; her classmates wondering aloud if standing on each other's shoulders would get them high enough to touch the stars.

Trini blinks a couple times, coming back down to earth as they make their way over. She gives a lazy wave and Gia Moran, one of her three roommates at Hogwarts, smiles wide and tackles her in a warm hug. Her long wavy blonde hair is pulled up into a high ponytail and she smells like she always does: flowery with a barely present vanilla that Trini associates with the comforting warmth of their dorm room.

"Hey," Gia says, stepping back once, meeting Trini's eyes through the light fog that chased her voice into the chilly air, breath made momentarily visible then dissipating into the night. And she sounds a bit different, a little rough due to the early hour.

"Hi," Trini returns, walking with her a few strides and coming to stand in the circle. "Thanks so much again for this, honestly—"

Gia makes a hushing sound, rubbing her hands together to warm them, the movement silenced by the thin fuzzy gloves she's wearing. "None of that," she says, then squeezes Trini's hand affectionately and moves to stand beside her lifelong best friend, Emma Goodall—a Slytherin girl a year below them.

Enrique takes Trini's other hand as their dad walks up to Gia's parents—a broad-shouldered, burly red-haired man with a thick, close-trimmed greying beard and a tall brunette woman with kind eyes—and shakes their hands. "Nice to see you both again. I can't thank you enough for the pair of tickets."

Mr. Moran smiles wide in the same way as his daughter. "The more the merrier, Mike," he says, in a thick Irish accent. He digs through the inside of his fur-lined jacket until he produces two large parchment tickets, handing them over with a satisfied hum. Trini's dad takes them with a smile and stows them away carefully, zipping them into his own coat pocket.

When Trini looks around at the group she sees Summer Landsdown and Chip Thorn, her other two roommates, and both give her a wave: Chip's a quick, bubbly thing and Summer offering more of a half-arsed flick of the wrist coupled with a small, warm smile.

"T, this is Vida's big sister Madison," Chip says lightly, gesturing to the tall dark-haired woman who looks to be in her early twenties standing beside Vida Rocca, another Slytherin and long-time friend of Chip's.

They all greet each other, and once they're done making their introductions and chatting a little Trini's dad glances at his watch once more. "Okay team, one minute," he announces, picking Enrique up again.

" _Time to catch the rubbish, Dante_ ," Trini whispers, running her thumb along the back of his hand then lifting him up into her arms. Their group of thirteen moves closer around their Portkey, which very much is a piece of rubbish indeed—it looks to be a rusted piece of a fence post. They each grip it and Dante and Enrique look at each other from their places wrapped around Trini and her dad, eyes wide and grinning with excited, toothy smiles that glow bright against the surrounding darkness.

There's a pause where they're standing there holding it in silence, then Trini's jerked forward as if by a hook around her waist, sending her spinning weightlessly, zooming through the air.

She soon hits the ground with a lurch and bends her knees like her dad told her to, which allows her to stay standing without falling over. And Trini doesn't have to open her eyes to know they've arrived in Dartmoor: the air is damp but clean, refreshing as it wraps around them, with the ever-present fog coming up around their shins to greet everyone with enthusiasm. Dante hops down from her a moment later, bending down to pat the cool grass beneath their feet a few times as if in thanks.

"Quarter past five from the Black Forest," comes a man's voice.

Meanwhile Chip—ever incapable of standing normally—somehow has toppled into Madison, who grabs her by the armpits and hauls her upright, muttering, "I'm gonna start charging you a Sickle every time this happens," as she shakes her head good-naturedly and pats Chip on the head like a toddler, making a bit of an effort to mess up her spiky auburn hair.

Chip smirks and waves her off then looks quizzically to the pair of Ministry wizards who stand in front of them. The look is very much warranted—in evidently trying to pass for muggles they're both dressed in the _strangest_ assortment of clothing.

After looking them both over once Trini has to hide her laugh behind her hand; Summer most definitely _doesn't_ do the same and laughs under her breath without shame, which prompts an elbow to the gut by Gia.

"Welcome," one of the wizards greets, holding a large unfurled roll of parchment in hand, sporting a tweed suit and a pair of rain boots that reach all the way up to his thighs. His counterpart, who's flat-out wearing a kilt with a poncho over top, grabs their rusted Portkey off the ground and tosses it into a beat-up box.

Mr. Moran steps forward to talk to the wizard with the parchment. "Under 'Moran', if you please," he says politely, and the other wizard in the kilt snaps his head up to stare at him, eyes widening.

The one in the tweed suit looks gobsmacked for a moment as well before he hurriedly starts looking down the names on his parchment, seemingly much more awake all at once. "Right, you're just a smidge over a quarter mile that way," he says, gesturing further into the moor. "It'll be the second field you come to. Your site manager is called Mister Payne."

"Thank you both very much," Mrs. Moran says, nodding at them. And with that, their group of thirteen turns to start off in the direction of their campsite, moving through the thick mist.

They've been walking for half a minute when a hasty voice rings out behind them, with the air of someone who had _very_ much been itching to speak, "Best of luck to your side! Your daughter is incredibly talented!" one of the Ministry wizards calls, and Trini turns her head to see him waving at them with a giddy excitement.

"Aye, the Irish don't need luck, sir!" Mr. Moran replies, turning to them as well and smiling wide as he walks backwards. "We make our own! But we appreciate the sentiment very much!"

Gia turns around too. "Have a nice day!" she chirps, voice full of over-the-top yet somehow genuine enthusiasm, waving back.

Emma pulls her by the arm insistently then, shaking her head and looking amused. "You're such an idiot," she mutters, playing with the camera slung by a black nylon strap around her neck.

Summer nods her agreement, kicking her feet through the dewy grass in great swooping strides. "I don't know how you've put up with her for this long, honestly," she quips, looking from Emma to Gia.

Emma smiles, running a hand through her long dark brown hair. Shrugs. "It's a tolerance thing, I'd expect. Built up an immunity," she says, which earns her a light shove from Gia and a chuckle from Chip.

Gia kicks her feet out behind her and scurries up to stand right in front of Emma, spinning around to start walking backwards with a bounce in her step. "I'm a delight and you know it, Em," she says, turning back around to walk beside her again. "You must know you're stuck in it, anyway. At this point, it's right well a 'till death do us part' kind of deal."

"It _already_ became that, though. A long time ago," Gia's mum says with a smile, looking over at the two of them and absentmindedly pulling at the lapel of her massive, calf-length dark fur coat. When it becomes clear that Gia and Emma have no idea what she's talking about, though, she elaborates, "I mean those weddings you two'd hold when you were tots."

Seeing continued blank stares, Mrs. Moran frowns. Looks at her husband for support. "In the back garden, don't you remember? Surely we've talked about this...?" she says, voice going up slightly in pitch and throwing Gia a questioning look.

"Even if you have, I'd _love_ to hear it again please," Summer says, looking at Gia with a gleeful glint in her eye. Trini's sure she's going to be teased about this later.

Emma smiles and nods at Gia's mum. "I think you’ve mentioned it, but I'd like to hear it too."

"Suuuuure mam, take us back," Gia says airily, making a sweeping gesture with her hand.

Trini smirks and keeps pace forward, holding Dante's hand and swinging it lightly.

They walk for a half hour or so, chatting and arsing around, and soon come to a little stone cottage next to a lane with a gate. A weathered-looking man sits out front in a chair with a scruffy dog sleeping at his feet.

"Hullo there," the man says, removing a nearly-finished cigarette from his mouth and placing the end in a rusted bean can next to his chair. He gets up and walks forward, and Mr. Moran goes to approach him, but Trini's dad puts a hand on his shoulder and steps in front of the group to grip the man's hand instead. The dog observes them curiously from its spot on the ground, tail wagging.

"Good morning. Mister Payne, I presume?" Trini's dad asks, and the man nods once, flashing a welcoming smile. "Brilliant. We've a booking under Moran, please."

"For all of you's?"

"Yes sir."

Mr. Payne nods again and consults the clipboard in his hand. A tiny crease appears between his eyebrows as his eyes flit over the page. "Moran... Moran... ah, here you are. At the top of the hill—really nice spot, that is." He taps the paper with one finger. "You can see the whole great mess of tents we have here, sure. View goes for miles, really, and if you get tired o'that you've got the wood right beside..."

Trini smiles, amused, watching as Mr. Payne chitchats away with her dad. It must get a tad bit lonely up here, to be sure. Not every day do a hundred thousand people decide to stay at your campsite.

"...plenty private. And—" he pauses abruptly, furrowing his brow. "Er, that can't be right. Says here you've only got one tent space booked."

Trini sees her dad's eyes widen slightly as Mr. Payne stares down at his clipboard, flipping through pages with the crease in his brow becoming deeper in confusion.

 _Ah, oops._

Having thirteen people booked for only one tent _would_ certainly be puzzling from his non-magical perspective. As much as they'd all done quite well at dressing like muggles, they hadn't even thought about this.

But her dad recovers quickly. "Oh, no—you're quite right. We're only booked for one tent. Some of us are staying in another field," he says, voice still cheery and waving a hand vaguely toward the multitude of tents that are starting to become visible in the approaching daylight. "Just making sure we all know where each other's situated so we can visit!"

And it's a bit of a stretch, given her dad said that they all were in the same booking moments ago, but Mr. Payne seems to accept the explanation. "That's kind of you's," he says, looking between the group with a soft smile. "Alright then, here's your map." He hands one to her dad then turns around, gesturing back toward the great dark wood visible in the distance now, a solid silhouette set stark against the soft morning light. "Up that hill you go — walk down the main lane all the way to the treeline and turn right up the incline until you're at the crest of it all. There it'll be!"

"Excellent. Thank you very much," her dad returns, shaking his hand again then handing over a mismatch of muggle bank notes. "And here's the fee."

Mr. Payne nods and takes the money back to the low table beside his chair, where he begins rummaging around in an old lockbox for some change.

"Oh, don't worry about it," her dad says quickly, as Mr. Payne turns back with the change in hand.

He smiles sincerely, inclining his head. "Thank you kindly. I hope you's have a pleasant stay."

"Have a nice day," her dad replies, then jerks his head for all of them to follow past the cottage towards the gate.

Once they've entered the campsite and are out of earshot, Mr. Moran claps him on the shoulder. "Thanks for doing that Mike. Likely, we would've needed to Obliviate him within thirty seconds if I was doing the talking. I'm rubbish with looking inconspicuous."

"Aye, he really is," Mrs. Moran chimes, squeezing his bicep and kissing him on the cheek.

"Boke, parents," Gia mutters, pulling a face but smiling at them.

Trini's dad smiles. "Of course. Getting the camping fee is the least I could do, so thank you again. As for the chatting, being muggle-born certainly has its uses."

They all make their way across the sleepy campsite together, walking along the main grassy lane toward the treeline and passing by hundreds of people as they go. The fog is lifting and Trini finds herself unable to stop smiling as she looks around, because there are plenty of tents that are in _no_ way whatsoever complying with the Ministry directive to keep a low profile, sporting all kinds of things—extensions, contraptions, decorations, and the like that look equally ridiculous as they do fantastic.

She's never been to an event like this with so many wizards in one area. As she eyes them curiously, she can't help but feel giddy at all of the magic that's on display.

"YO! CAPTAIN HANDSOME!" Gia shouts abruptly, speeding to the back of their group to yell after two people walking away from them up the hill to the right, both clearly in the middle of trying to read a campsite map. She cups her hands on either side of her mouth. "STRUT, STRUT!"

The tallest of the two figures—Cedric Diggory, Trini and Gia's Quidditch team Captain—looks around in confusion for a moment before Gia starts wolf-whistling at him obnoxiously. Emma covers her face with a hand and shakes her head, looking at the ground and grinning, and Mr. Moran stops to wait with a fond smile pulling at the side of his mouth, seemingly accustomed to his daughter's antics at this point. And Trini is _delighted_ that Cedric actually responded to 'Captain Handsome', given that their entire Quidditch squad had been calling him that incessantly for the entire year previous. He refused to respond to it then, but it seems that they've engrained it into his subconscious.

 _Excellent_.

Cedric sees Gia and makes a similar face to Emma's, happily bewildered, then pats the person next to him on the shoulder—his dad, it looks like—and starts making his way back towards them, weaving around a handful of other sleepy people mulling about.

Trini turns and meets her dad's eyes. "Why don't you all go on up to the site?" she says, not wanting to make the entire group wait.

"You've got a polite one here, Mike," Mr. Moran deadpans, staring pointedly over Trini's shoulder. She turns to see that Gia has taken off like a shot, running in Cedric's direction and flailing her hands in the air like an over-the-top comedy act.

Trini turns back to smile at Mr. Moran and he inclines his head, eyes twinkling. "If you can wrangle my daughter, we'll meet you up there in a moment, Trini."

He and Mrs. Moran share a look and stare fondly after Gia for another few moments. With a little hum, he throws a questioning glance at Trini's dad, who nods.

"Okay, and you know where to find it?" her dad asks, peering at Trini over top of his glasses.

"Yeah," she replies, pushing Dante gently towards her dad. "Top of the hill. We'll walk along the treeline until we see you lot." 

"Okay _mija_ , see you soon," her dad says, smiling and turning with the rest of the group.

By way of departure Summer flips her off happily, whipping her long straight blonde hair around like a diva, while Chip gives her a jaunty wave. Emma turns to go as well, walking backwards with the group and gesturing in Gia's direction. "I'll leave you to deal with her, shall I?" she asks, wearing a soft smile.

Trini lets out a little laugh. "Got it from here. We'll only be a moment."

Emma nods and turns to go with the rest, and with that Trini starts walking down the grassy lane over to Gia and Cedric, who are chatting away.

When she reaches them Cedric bends down to give her a hug, lifting her up a little off the ground then letting her go.

He grins down at her. "Small."

"Tall," Trini returns, giving him a curt nod. "Where're you staying?"

He gestures back to his dad, who's still standing in the same spot and trying to read the map with an expression that suggests he's hoping for it to audibly tell him where to go. "Haven't a clue. Dad tends to be a bit presumptuous, see—the bloke at the entrance was trying to give him directions, but he sort of just walked off and said he knew where he was headed."

"Yikes," Trini says, grimacing. "Go back and ask, maybe?"

Cedric nods glumly. "I expect that after wandering around for another half hour or so, he'll finally give in and admit that he has not a _blundering_ idea of where he's going."

"Well, we can walk with you now if you want?" Trini suggests, gesturing toward Mr. Payne's cabin.

Cedric smiles. "It's not a bother, honest. He knows the general vicinity I think, and we're here for father-son bonding time, after all." He shrugs one shoulder. "You're both lovely for offering though."

"I did no such thing," Gia grunts, examining her cuticles with a faux-bored expression. Seeing this, Cedric looks at Trini for a moment with a twinkle in his eye then swoops downward without warning, picking Gia up at the thighs and swinging her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Trini starts laughing as Gia struggles for a moment then gives up just as quickly. Propping her elbow against his back and resting her chin atop it, she begins casually looking at the mass of tents around them as if she'd requested to be picked up in the first place.

"As I was _saying_ ," Cedric drawls, acting like nothing happened, "I don't mind wandering around with him for a bit. But why don't I come find you after we're set up? Dad said he wanted to take a nap for a few hours, but I'd rather be up and about." He gestures around at the campsite with a flourish and Trini understands; she doesn't think she could ever be tired in a place like this. Not now, anyway.

"Deal," Gia says loudly. Trini raises her eyebrow and Cedric pivots so she can be heard better. "If you run into Cadwallader again or any of the others, Ced, feel free to bring them along too," she continues, drumming her fingers on his back. "We're just going to have breakfast and get to drinking. Maybe explore a bit."

Cedric tips her off his shoulder gently and lowers her to the ground. "Sounds brilliant." 

Trini smiles and turns around then, gesturing toward where she expects their campsite to be. "We haven't actually been there yet, but we know our spot is right up against the treeline and at the very top of the hill. Shouldn't be hard to find. Come over whenever you'd like."

"Cool," Cedric says, backing up and back towards his dad, who hasn't moved an inch. "See you!"

Trini and Gia both wave and then turn around to make their way back down to the main grassy lane that runs across the campsite.

"So, you're full of beans this morning," Trini says after a minute or so, with a bit of a question in her voice.

Gia looks over at her and seems to deflate a little. "Is that a leading comment?" she asks, in a tone that says she knows full well that it is.

Trini shrugs. "It's not a bad thing. You just have a bit of a... different vibe today."

Gia groans quietly. "You and your vibes, for fuck's sake." She pauses for a few moments. Deflating, dropping the pretense. "I think it's excitement plus nervousness, plus..." she trails off, looking a tad self-conscious. "I don't know. This sounds so feckin' whiny, but having a sister who's one-third of one of the best—if not _the_ best—Quidditch front lines that the literal world has seen in a really long time? Man."

Trini nods, catching on. "It's a lot, mate."

Gia sighs, whipping her hands up and gesturing around vaguely. "And I'm so happy for her! So proud — she's wanted this her entire life and she's done it! I just..." she trails off again. Her voice gets quieter, smaller, like she's telling Trini a secret, "I just hope that I can make my parents as proud of me one day as they are of her, you know? And not just in a success kind of way, but also more generally, I guess." She's silent for a few moments as she looks at the ground, watching their feet tread together through the flattened dewy grass. And Trini waits, because Gia opening up like this isn't something that happens often.

"I want to be a person whose life has _just_ as much of a purpose as hers does," Gia says softly, tipping her head to the side a little. The skin of her cheekbone pulls taut, jaw flexing a few times. Chewing on her words. "I want to find the kind of meaning that she's found by doing something with my life that I believe in, or love, or am passionate about, or whatever. And I hope to everything that it makes them proud of me."

She takes a deep breath in and out then, lighter already somehow at having said all of that out loud, and Trini looks over at her with warmth in her eyes. They walk for a bit like that in silence before Trini takes her hand and squeezes it once. "I know you aren't going to believe this, Gia, but they're proud of you _already_. I can see it in how they look at you," she says gently, running her thumb over her hand once and letting go. "And your sister has, what, eight years on you, right?"

Gia nods.

Trini hums then adjusts her beanie. "Listen, my little brothers are younger than me by six years. And I'm no all-star Chaser, but if I were to compare their accomplishments to mine, it'd be doing them a massive disservice. I've had so much more opportunity—I've had so much more time. They're still so young."

Trini sighs, dips her head. Talks to the grass to make the words feel less targeted. Safer, softer. "I know you, mate. I know that you hit the ground running with everything that you do. And I want you to find that thing—something to believe in, something to love—that instills a feeling of purpose in you. I want that _so_ much for you."

As they walk, Trini watches a few little kids chase each other around one of the tents laughing, shrieking, having the time of their lives. She feels remarkably at ease here: in the rising sun of the early morning, surrounded by the promise of a bright bubbling chaos that's _just_ beginning to wake up around them. "From where I'm standing, though, you're already halfway there," she continues. "'Cause from what you just said, your biggest hope is that your family is proud of you _after_ you get to the top of whatever mountain you choose to climb."

Trini's hands get a bit wavy, forming something more physical than sound in attempt to help Gia grab hold, to understand. "That's the distinction: you're not trying to find purpose and meaning _in order to_ make them proud of you. You wanna find it for yourself, not anybody else." She hears her own smile begin to play through her voice, "And, man, god knows what your purpose might turn out to be. You could end up anywhere. I don't know your parents, but I mean it when I say that they look at you like you're the centre of their universe _already_. They're already proud of you, and I need you to know that."

She puts her hand on Gia's arm as they stride up the last bit of the hill, nearly coming to the top. "If they see you find meaning in your life—whether that's being a Quidditch god, or a cook, or a regular person in an office, or something neither of us can even dream of right now—where you're happy and fulfilled and _believe_ in something?" Trini shakes her head a little, a smile pulling at one side of her mouth. "Mate, they're going to be _so_ fucking proud of you."

Gia takes a deep breath in and out then and stops walking, gazing out over the mismatch of tents stretching out below them. She looks at Trini for a few moments then tilts forward, stepping once, twice into her space tentatively and pulling her into a hug. "Thank you," she whispers.

They break apart and Trini smiles at her, then changes tack to something much sillier, puffing up like an overgrown bird and grinning. "Now, shall we go party like it's not seven in the morning?"

"Mate, I'm Irish," Gia says, with a mischievous grin blooming on her face. "We're going to party _exactly_ like it's seven in the morning."

.

A few hours later finds all of the kids—including Trini's little brothers—playing a rowdy game of Exploding Snap on the plush red rug in the centre of the Moran's massive, airy wizarding tent. It's outfitted and decorated in a way that Trini would imagine a very expensive manor house to look like on the inside: deep red velvets, dark woods, and a whole lot of individual rooms featuring mattresses that are probably worth more each than the sum of everything that she owns.

Cedric and two more members of the Hufflepuff Quidditch team—Dustin Brooks and Cadwallader, Keeper and Chaser respectively—are present, laughing boisterously and clutching butterbeers with big smiles on their faces. Outside are the adults, along with a bunch of the other parents of the Irish players, all gathered around the cooking fire. The Irish team's families seem to be staying in their vicinity by design, and hearing her dad out there laughing with all of them warms Trini's heart a whole lot.

It reminds her a bit of being in the youngsters football league when she was still in muggle school, travelling around with her team and all of their parents to away tournaments, staying in little hotels or motels scattered all over England. Always feeling like they were all on a different planet for those weekends—where they'd have a whole block of rooms between them and take over entire floors, goofing off and getting into trouble while their parents spent time together close by, be it around a fire at the back of a seedy rural motel or in a stuffy fast food restaurant with burgers and chips between them.

And Trini's been drinking since seven o'clock this morning, so she's sure it's the (light) influence of butterbeer that's bringing her back to nostalgia central, but she doesn't entirely mind. It's warm, safe. Not a bad place for her thoughts to occupy.

"Lunch, wains!" comes Mrs. Moran's voice, and Trini looks up to see her head poking through the tied-open canvas tent flap. "Burgers and potato salad!"

At once realising she's starving, Trini smiles wide and looks around at their group with a question on her face. Across from her, Gia elbows one of the boys Trini doesn't know (save for that he's the cousin of one of the Irish players) and the two of them get up and stretch.

Trini gets to her feet as well and pulls her brothers up with her, not feeling unsteady from the butterbeer in the slightest. It's certainly alcoholic, but she's paced herself well and eaten a whole lot of food throughout the morning. Better yet for her, the entire group—including the parents—is planning to nap for a few hours after lunch.

Given the game isn't until after dusk, she thinks this an excellent idea.

They all make their way out into the sunshine, and after squinting a bit at the light Trini marvels at the sight again. Because Mr. Payne was right—their campsite has a _brilliant_ view: the wizard tent city stretches out before them, down the hill and further, further, quite literally as far as she can see. It's a white strip against all the lush green—much longer than it is wide, bordered on the right by the woods and on the left by the cabins of the site managers, tiny dots spread out with a healthy amount of space between them.

Standing above it all and feeling the energy abounds makes her feel brighter, somehow. Like she's a living, breathing part of all the waking reverie and celebration.

"'Look Simba,'" Cedric says, coming out of the tent to stand beside her and doing his best attempt at a deep voice. "'Everything the light touches is our kingdom.'" He gestures with his beer out over the sprawl of tents below them and Trini chuckles, rolling her eyes.

Grabbing his forearm gently, she tows him to the right, to just beneath the treeline where some thirty people or so are gathered around the fire in the shade.

She shepherds her brothers to sit with her in the lush cool grass around their dad's camp chair, and they plop down with content smiles, the two of them leaning on one of his legs apiece. Cedric comes along and sits as well, leaning up against Gia, who's leaning on Summer, who's leaning on Chip, who's leaning on a tree and looking squished but comfortable.

And this whole hanging out outside of school thing is entirely new for them. Because they four—her, Chip, Summer, and Gia—are roommates, yes, but they're by no means best friends.

It isn't due to some big, glaring issue or anything, either; they all have each others' backs and Trini would throw down for any one of them in a heartbeat, but she doesn't feel the kind of closeness that she knows exists between Gia and Emma, for example. Trini has a hard time being vulnerable with anyone, which tends to stunt the growth of her friendships before they can really get going, and though that's not exactly the case here—she talks with these girls about all kinds of things—it's more that they just don't _click_ on a deeper level.

It took Trini a while to understand that not every friendship is a linear line of goals or milestones, where you get closer and closer with someone until you inevitably ascend to some idealistic, higher friendship Zen. It took her even longer to grasp the fact that being close with someone, but not Best Friends, isn't a failure between two people. Because some people just _fit_ together better, like puzzle pieces matching up seamlessly, while others can get so, so close to it, but the reality might be that they're made a bit differently; maybe all of the grooves work except for one, so there's that gap of space, even when they find themselves pressed up against one another.

But those pieces are still _close_ —as close as they can be given everything that they are. And that's not a flaw in their make at all.

No, just a difference.

Trini's content with these girls not knowing every single part of her, because they don't _have_ to. The four of them are doing something outside of school that they all enjoy, with family and other people they care about around them; they love each other deeply, and her roommates are true friends—loyal and loving, and the closest thing she has to sisters. Being with them, going through school with them — it's enough.

Their group sits around the fire for the next few hours eating, laughing, drinking, and listening to one of the Irish players' dad's [play](https://open.spotify.com/track/3echO8gsLwVgyvsZvO2SH4?si=fdubY4zPScKO8vWA3ojiWQ) folk songs on his fiddle while some of the others sing along softly.

"' _Oh whisky, you're the devil! You're leading me astray..._ '"

Trini smiles as she listens, Enrique in her lap now and asleep up against her. Dante is more of the same, curled into a loose question mark on top of her dad, who sits in his chair stroking his back, eyes shut. Around them, people have either fallen asleep or started to make their way back to their tents for some shut-eye before the match.

"Okay, I think it's nap time," Cedric whispers, leaning into Trini's shoulder with a lazy smile. He makes to get up from beside Gia, careful in trying not to wake her, but her eyes flick open with the movement. She blinks a few times, eyelids heavy, takes in her surroundings and cranes her head around, then nods once at the two of them.

"Sleep?" Gia mutters, rubbing at one of her eyes and trying to get up from where Summer is leaned against her. She has more success than Cedric, and Summer lays down flat on the grass in her absence, head bobbing side-to-side for a moment then settling back into sleep.

Just as Trini's about to deadlift Enrique into her arms, Cedric puts his hand on her shoulder and jerks his head downward, asking permission to pick him up. She squeezes his forearm and nods once, soft eyes watching as he bends down and gently brings Enrique up, wrapping his arms around him and stabilising his head between his chin and shoulder. They follow Gia into the tent and to the left, over to the small comfortable room that her family is sharing.

Trini pulls the sandy-coloured canvas flap back that serves as a door and turns the bedcovers down. Removes Enrique's shoes and smiles as she watches Cedric tuck him in on the far side of the little cot. "Okay, one..." he breathes, making to go back outside again.

To their left across the tent Gia putters around the kitchen, getting some water for the three of them as Trini and Cedric go back out to the fire. Coming up to her dad, Trini gestures to Cedric and he smiles before picking Dante up in the same way, who wraps his little arms around Cedric's neck unconsciously, trusting without knowing.

And watching Cedric walk carefully as they go back into the tent, Trini can't help but think that he's going to make a really, really great dad one day.

He puts Dante in the cot next to Enrique and they curl towards each other in their sleep. Watching with warm eyes, he smiles down at them then looks at Trini, nodding once. "Two."

Trini leads him back out into the open-concept tent and into the kitchen, where Gia's slouched in one of the dining chairs, all plush pale leather brass-pinned elegantly to stiff lacquered wood, nursing a water and midway through devouring a packet of crisps. There are two more full glasses beside her, and Trini takes hers gratefully. Sips at it. The cool water glides down her throat, and she sighs contentedly.

Cedric throws his head back and drains his in one go. Wiping at his mouth with the back of his hand, he checks his watch, nods once. "I'm gonna clear out. Hoping to get a couple hours before sundown." He jerks his head in the direction of the fire outside. "I'll grab Wally and Brooks and drop them off at their tents—they're on the way."

Trini and Gia nod at him, both blinking slowly. He gives them a warm smile then puts his glass down in the sink, starting to make his way across the tent. "See you back here after the match, team. Thanks so much again for hosting us all day."

Gia waves him off easily, heavy head braced on her palm, elbow up on the table. A position likely to earn her a tell-off from her mother were she to walk in.

Trini's dad comes through the entrance flap then, shaking Cedric's hand warmly and gripping his shoulder as they pass each other. With that, Cedric exits the silence of the charmed tent and walks out into the late afternoon.

Her dad yawns and waves at them as he pads across the airy space, making his way to bed and retiring for a nap. Gia and Trini both get up to do the same, drinking the last of their water and getting off to bed.

Trini bids her good-nap and enters her family's shared room. She smiles—her dad has forgone his own cot and cuddled up to the boys on theirs, barely fitting on the edge. Protective in the way he's curled around them.

With light footsteps she moves over to her bed and climbs into it, not even bothering to change clothes. Within minutes she's fast asleep; warm, content.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter song title is 'I'm Not the Sun' by the Arkells.


	3. Back Where I Belong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/78W8wiUIlQ2SnWY9TVowKZ?si=tC21QU0DQjqfmCCeM9PolA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"' _I'M GONNA LIVE FOREVER! I'M GONNA LEARN HOW TO FLY!_ '" they shout-sing, arms draped around loose shoulders. Gesturing with half-drank beers and dangerously sloshing plastic cups toward the thousands of tents that stretch out below them. They're at the crest of the after-match celebration, right in the thick of it all—thousands of people staggering around, _beaming_ in the high of the Irish win and stoking the revelry, burning against the night.

With the entirety of Ireland's team now drunk as all hell, ['Fame'](https://open.spotify.com/track/5CI1FP2Volc9wjz2MBZsGx?si=LLh7ttsIRySMvLuAKVxilA) by Irene Cara is blasting from the amplified gramophone setup at the doing of their Seeker, Aidan Lynch, who looks much more unsteady than the rest on account of his repeated ploughs into the pitch earlier.

"' _...I'M GONNA MAKE IT TO HEAVEN, LIGHT UP THE SKY LIKE A FLAME!_ '" Trini yells along with the rest, voice moving through her throat in a thrumming way now, vocal cords signalling they'd like a break now, please. But she does it with what seems like _everyone_ in the vicinity, which makes her feel like she's soaring above it all, lifted by the goosebumps on her skin and the fearlessness in her heart.

The fire at the treeline has grown—cultivated into a bonfire proper, reaching high above her head and up to the starry night sky, a blazing witness to the huge group of people dancing around it with abandon, arms linked and holding each other up; somehow now keeping the beat of the Rolling Stones cover of ['Not Fade Away'](https://open.spotify.com/track/0C7w4XnkIGu11MpNWbiTLB?si=D9ga22Z5QBODGYteTx8mFA) that's begun to play, despite their wobbly, intoxicated knees working against them.

And the rest of the campsite as a whole is settling down, a steady slip off into unconsciousness that they, from their vantage point atop the hill, can see in tangible measure: fires doused and lanterns snuffed, with shouting, laughing, and singing falling away, embraced by the calm silence of a summer night in an otherwise unremarkable campsite on a misty moor.

Below them and a good ways off there's a large distinctive patch of tents that is still awake, all with shamrocks growing over them and around. There are great fires, dancing, and plenty noise coming from there; not seeming to want to quit anytime soon, which she can definitely understand.

To be sure, Trini's not entirely sure _how_ long they've been celebrating—must be hours?

Certainly spent some time up on Cedric's shoulders, swaying and shooting a whole host of _Dr. Filibusters Wet-Start, No-Heat Fireworks_ off—green ones picked from the pile deliberately like sweets—into the sky above;

Chased Summer around when she stole her beer, nearly tripping over Gia snogging that guy—the cousin of... whichever player—in the grass;

Nearly was sick after chugging whatever number drink that was (but kept it down, like a _winner_ );

Chatted with Quigley, one half of the Irish Beaters duo, about tactics. Nice bloke, sweeter than she would have thought. She hopes she remembers more of their conversation tomorrow than she does right now.

_Useful, that._

Presently, and the time irrelevant, Trini can be found flouncing about holding Chip up—or _being_ held up by Chip, not sure—weaving between drinking game tables, deliberating what to try her hand at next.

And ah, where did that keg go?

Someone passes by and then the crowd parts. It's _there_ beckoning a keg stand, but, no. Because here her team is—this is better. Gia, Cedric, Dustin, Cadwallader playing flip cup.

Her and Chip set themselves up on opposite sides, each the fifth to the team, and Summer, grinning like the devil she is, points with two fingers to her own eyes then at Trini, all _'I see you, bitch'_. Trini jerks her chin up and smiles right back, accepting the challenge. Their rivalry is a loving one.

Then the ten of them are playing, with round after round blurring by when a sound like another firework going off erupts from behind them—somewhere down the hill amongst the sea of tents.

It's louder, though. Did she feel that in the earth underneath them?

Trini frowns, head turning anti-clockwise almost imperceptibly, curious ear following the noise, unable to make heads or tails of it. And it must be due to her brain not processing very quickly at the moment on account of the alcohol, but something like alarm sparks once in her chest, flickers, then goes out.

_Easy. It's just fireworks._

Why is her heart picking up pace?

Ah, Cadwallader flipped his cup. It's her turn, and she knocks the beer back like it's water, having lost the ability to taste much of anything some hours ago. With a flick of deft fingers, a slight practised raise of the wrist, she flips it in one go.

 _BANG_.

_What the—_

In unison Trini, Cadwallader, Dustin, Cedric, and Gia turn around, away from the game, from the laughter; squinting in effort to filter the darkness from the glare of the happy lights, the fires, the celebration.

 _That_ wasn't a firework. Was it a gunshot?

_No, no, Trini. You're in the middle of a wizarding event..._

She tries to spur her brain to work faster, now, walking closer to where their flat area of hilltop starts to tilt to a decline. The rest of her team and friends are with her, shoulder-to-shoulder in a line, drawn toward the violent noise; moths to something like a streetlight—jarring in the dark, unnatural in the setting, imposed on the environment around it.

This feels like that. Off, out of place. One of these things is not like the other.

They join the growing group of people who have gathered at the edge of the hill already. Trini squints in the same way they are and follows the line of their index fingers, pointing into the darkness across the camp diagonally from where they stand.

Then a scream pierces the night.

Then another, then another.

Shouts, yells, frantic and frenzied.

And after a moment Trini sees it: a dark mass of people on the edge of the tent city—on the moor side, where they all entered from this morning, near the first site manager's cabin they passed before coming to their bloke, Mr. Payne.

The mob is the furthest possible from the woods, emerging from the mist of the moor in a way that is sinister, somehow. And it's no different from how she, her family, and friends walked through it this morning, but also not at all the same.

Screams continue to sound. And people are running, now, towards the woods in the opposite direction. Tents seem to vanish as they're spelled to collapse and pack themselves up—trying to be inconspicuous for the muggles has been abandoned, apparently—their owners trying to get them out of the way as the ominous group gets bigger, as it approaches.

Another _BANG_ sounds—the dark mass of people clearly the source. This time, the noise is paired with a green light that illuminates everything for a moment, and Trini's breath hitches. Because from here they can see everything, and they can most definitely spot the group of people—four, maybe—hanging above the mob eerily. She sees wands in the air.

"You guys," Cedric says lowly, not taking his eyes off the scene below them, "what the fuck?"

Summer has a pair of Omnioculars from the match pressed up to her eyes. She lowers them in a jerky movement, handing them back to whoever she borrowed them from, then looks between the chaos then back to all of them—Emma, Vida, and everyone else around too, now—as people hurry past, everything becoming more frantic in the spaces between tense seconds.

Looking between their group, Summer nods like she's steeling herself. "We have to go help. Do you see who they've got above them?" she asks sharply.

Trini shakes her head then crudely slaps her own face before drawing her wand out of the battered brown leather holster she wears on her left forearm. She's about to ask Summer to clarify when—

"TRINI!" comes her dad's voice, clear through the growing noise, and she spins on the spot. She can't see him, where did that come from?

" _TRINI, WHERE ARE YOU?_ " her dad shouts again, in Spanish.

" _DAD! I'M HERE!_ "

He finds her quickly, her brothers both clinging to him and blinking slowly, woken up from peaceful sleep in a rush. Dante's on her dad's back with his arms wrapped around his neck, and Enrique is being held up by his right arm. Her dad bends down a little, perches Enrique on his leg and grips onto Trini's biceps.

After searching her eyes for a moment, he nods to himself then points his wand at her face. " _Sorry for this, honey—_ "

There's a flash of bright blue light, and she's certain he's just dumped a cold bucket of water over her head. She blows a breath of air out quickly, shaking her head like a dog despite being completely dry. Feels her alcohol-clouded mind clear, sobering up at once.

Everything sharp again, no longer blurred at the edges, her heart _really_ starts thundering in her chest.

Her dad stares at her with an uncharacteristic hardness in his eyes. " _I'm sorry, but you need to be in your right mind._ " He jerks his head towards the mob. " _I have to go help down there. Those are muggles they're tormenting..._ " trailing off, he pauses, seemingly considering whether to tell her something else. " _That group, they're wearing Death Eater masks—_ "

Trini's eyes widen and she immediately shakes her head. " _If they're Death Eaters you can't—_ "

" _You need to take the boys and get into the woods_ ," he interjects, gripping her bicep a bit tighter. " _Go as far as you can and find a place to hide._ "

Her voice gets higher, grabbing his shoulder and holding onto him just as tightly as he is her, " _No. Don't be a hero—_ "

" _Discussion over_ ," he says, and there is a rare finality in his voice. It's this, of all things, that stops her from continuing to argue. And he must see the resignation in her eyes, because his tone is softer when he speaks again, " _Trini_ ," he takes her face in his hands and looks deep into her eyes, " _if I can help those people, then it's my responsibility to._ "

She grits her teeth and shakes her head, heartbeat now in her ears and honest-to-god terrified. As she stares back at him wide-eyed, she takes a deep breath in and out, trying to calm herself down like he taught her years ago.

_Control, control. It's all about control. Breathe._

Trini turns around to look at the rapidly-swelling mob below and silently damns her limited education. Because she wants to help, wants to curse those scumbags to the darkest, hottest corner of hell, but she knows full well that all of this is _way_ out of her depth. She'd just be in the way.

Feeling helpless, she finally nods and her dad does the same.

"Okay," he says in English, looking around at where Mrs. Moran is talking fast to Gia, Summer, and Chip. "I will find you. Just get to safety." He hands her Enrique, who's looking more awake now. Scared. "Take the boys and go—"

"Here Mike, give me Dante," Cedric says, appearing just behind Trini. A solid presence at her back, support against all of the blurring confusion around them.

Her dad nods and Cedric scoops him up, carrying him on his front in the same way as he did earlier.

"Trini, I can take Ricky," Cadwallader says quietly then, coming up to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with Cedric. They stand a couple inches taller than her dad, the two of them nearly the same height with similar features, and tend to get asked if they're related quite often.

Trini looks down at Enrique. " _I'm going to be right beside you, okay? We_ _'ll be able to go faster this way_ ," she says in Spanish, and when Enrique gives her a tiny nod, she guides him up to Cadwallader with thanks.

"Do you lads need help sobering up?" her dad asks, not condescending at all. Cedric furrows his brow then nods, screwing his eyes shut in anticipation of the spell (and though he doesn’t drink, Cadwallader does the same, perhaps hoping it'll make him more awake). Her dad raises his wand again, emitting another two flashes of bright blue light.

Both of them shake their heads a little—Cadwallader's cheeks puff out, exhaling sharply—as Mrs. Moran comes up to stand beside Trini's dad with the girls on her heels, wand out and still in her long woollen dressing gown. "All of you stay together," she says firmly, looking between them. Some of the other older kids take Cedric and Cadwallader's lead, picking the younger ones up into their arms.

With that, Trini's dad kisses her and the twins on the head then takes off to their right, striding with Mrs. Moran to stand at the front of a group of what must be forty adults: Gia's dad and sister, Vida's sister Madison, along with parents, family, friends, and the rest of the Irish Quidditch team, all with wands out and looking determined.

And with every single thing Trini's ever read about Death Eaters running through her mind like some kind of sick highlight reel—all of the death, torture, needless suffering, brutality—she wants to scream after her dad. To run and grab him. Force him to come back somehow.

But her feet stay rooted to the spot. She knows she can't.

And standing here staring after them, she's certain that she's never been this terrified in her life.

The adults all start descending the hill at a sprint and Disapparate as they go, presumably appearing in the thick of the chaos below.

And Trini looks to the centre of the disturbance—seeing tents on fire now, the crowd growing larger and larger around the floating muggles—before looking back at her friends and the rest of the kids. "Okay, fuck. Let's go."

They all nod and promptly take off with Cedric—ever the Quidditch Captain—at the front, running straight into the darkness of the woods.

" _Lumos_ ," Trini mutters, certain that 'Dark wizard gang inactive for the past thirteen years decides to attack an international wizarding event campsite' falls under the Emergency Circumstances exception to the Degree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery. Around her she hears the others do the same, and the ground at their feet is at once lit up in bright, revealing light.

The breeze sweeping through the trees becomes cooler as they go, the air more slippery and agile, not as thick as out in the moor. They keep pace until the wood is close to silent around them—the dark shadows that had been running parallel to their group now gone, a cacophony of cries and screams and shouts faded into the night. Trees become closer together, plants more dense, and Trini's starting to wonder if they should climb up a tree or something to camp out when Dustin makes a noise as if to speak, then stops and clears his throat of whatever frog has hopped in there, what with all the running.

"Let's stop here," he huffs, gesturing to a thicket then looking to Cedric beside him for agreement. They're the two eldest of the group—Dustin going into his seventh year at Hogwarts and Cedric into his sixth.

Cedric cranes his neck past Dustin to see what he's pointing at and nods. Swallows thickly, chest heaving. "Yeah, alright. Good call."

They all follow Dustin and Cedric, ducking under a kind of natural knotted archway into a small sheltered clearing. It's a whole mess of thick twining plants that have grown together around trees, forming a natural, roughly circular fence taller than she is. Cedric waves his wand and conjures a host of blankets for them all to sit on, then sits down himself, pulling Trini gently by the elbow down with him. They all huddle together against the cold, Trini with the twins on either side of her, snuggled into her chest and held with her arms around them protectively.

Nobody really talks, too worried for their friends and family to say much of anything—vague imaginations running through their minds of duels in-between tents, echoing screams, and towering Dark Wizards in masks cursing the people they love. There are some hushed, whispered comments or questions here and there; idle chat to pass the time.

After a while Trini feels something wet against her neck, and she's confused for a moment before realising that Enrique is crying silently. With a start she tilts her head down to speak into his hair, making sure to keep her voice as soothing as possible, " _Hey, hey_ ," she coos in Spanish, rubbing gently at his arm. " _We're okay, Ricky. Dad's going to be fine. You're doing great._ " She kisses Dante on top of the head, too. " _You're both doing brilliantly._ "

She takes a deep breath in and out, adjusting the blanket that covers them. Trying to keep her traitorous heartbeat from cracking her Calm & Collected Older Sister façade.

And twenty minutes or so go by before Cedric speaks, voice quiet and calming as to not wake the twins and the rest of the younger kids, who have by now drifted off to fitful sleep, "Why don't some of you lot go to bed for the moment?" he asks, looking around at everyone. "We dunno how long this is gonna be."

Murmurs of agreement sound here and there but Trini elects to stay awake, despite all the while knowing that she wouldn't be able to fight a full-grown wizard unless she had the jump on them. But she feels useless otherwise, and Summer seems to have the same idea—she shakes her head silently, blonde hair catching the light of the moon coming through the trees. Just as stubborn as Trini, if not more.

With everyone still huddled together Emma falls asleep with her head on Gia's chest. Chip does the same spooning Vida, who in turn is wrapped around one of the little boys protectively, who's holding onto the toe of Dustin's shoe lightly in his sleep. All feeling a semblance of safety at the contact.

And time passes in sprints and stops as Trini finds herself in an exhausted half-consciousness, head lolling a bit against the ancient tree she's propped up against.

She's trying to stay awake and mostly succeeds until she no longer has to try at all — sitting up with a start, all sleepiness is jolted out of her at a faraway shout that sounds through the trees:

"KIDS?!"

Gia and Chip's heads pop up at nearly the same moment, looking confused briefly before stilling in effort to hear better. Trini doesn't recognise the voice and holds out her hand to Cadwallader, who looks like he's about to shout back. "We don't know who it is," she whispers, just loud enough for the others who are awake to hear.

Next to her, Cedric nods and gets up, a finger to his lips, then moves towards the little opening in the thicket and goes out. Trini carefully extracts herself out from underneath the sleeping twins and makes to follow with Summer at her shoulder, finding Cedric leaning up against a tree to shield himself from sight.

She stands with Summer behind a thick tree next to Cedric's as Dustin and Cadwallader do the same on his other side. The other older kids fan out a bit, wands held tight in their hands, jaw muscles flexing over and over as they all wait in taut silence.

"KIDS?! ARE YOU OUT HERE?!" comes the shout again, and they can see flashes of multiple lights coming their way now, sweeping through the dark.

Trini tightens the grip on her wand, ready to shout the only real spell she knows that could be of any help in this situation ( _'STUPEFY!'_ ) at anyone who comes close. Gia, Vida, Chip, and Emma, along with three of the other, older kids who had fallen asleep, come stalking up around them, mimicking their positions braced against the trees.

Gia and Cedric share a look, where Gia points to the thicket and back to their group—Trini gathers they've left some of the older kids in the shelter of the thicket to keep the young ones calm if they wake up.

They don't make to move, waiting. Standing coiled, ready to storm out. And Trini's heartbeat has traveled up her rushing bloodstream, apparently, taking up residence in her ears.

_Thumpthumpthumpthumpthumpthump..._

The unfamiliar voice is followed by another, then, with a thick Irish accent this time; the sound causes Trini's shoulders to sag with how the tension floods out of her. "KIDS?! WHERE ARE YOU?!"

Summer does the same beside her, letting out a tiny breath of relief at Mr. Moran's booming voice.

Dustin seems to recognise it too. "WE'RE HERE!" he calls, cupping a palm to the side of his mouth to help his voice carry.

At the same time, Gia yells, "DAD!"

"I HEAR YOU, PUPS! SIT TIGHT!" Mr. Moran shouts. There's a pronounced _pop_ that sounds, then silence. Another moment and a set of blue sparks streak straight upward, climbing up, up, above the top of the skeletal trees and erupting a little ways from where they're situated. Trini looks up and allows herself to breathe again, watching the sparks streak away and disappear into the sky like lightning escaping from a bottle.

Not ten seconds later there's a whole lot of _pops_ followed by what sounds like a crowd of voices, and a huge host of lights start sweeping about.

"KIDS?" comes a new voice, a woman's. At the sound, one of the boys on Trini's right—the one who Gia was snogging earlier—perks up.

"MAM!" he shouts, sounding as young as Trini feels.

Another new voice, relieved, "KIDS!"

Trini, Chip, Dustin, Emma, Vida, and a few of the others rush back to their thicket shelter and soon come out with all of the little ones. And Trini doesn't know _why_ she's holding back tears, but with her brothers clutching at her hands, she wipes at her eyes quickly with the tops of her shoulders.

As they stream out into the open darkness again they hear heavy boots snap branches up ahead, plants pushed out of the way quickly like an army of brooms swept across a porch in staccato — the lights get brighter, and Mr. Moran finally emerges out of the night, limping a little.

A warmth floods Trini’s body as he strides toward them, because even in the suffocating darkness two things are perfectly distinguishable: his smile—a toothy, mouth-half-open kind of happiness that radiates outward; and the bright whites of his watery eyes. Illuminated by a tangible, peaceful relief.

More of the adults appear, lit wands held aloft and walking in a massive formation akin to a search party line. As they start to see the kids they converge, walking faster and together in a group; a living, breathing arrow pointing home.

It's a tense few seconds before the two sides collide: Gia's mum, dad, and sister embracing her, Emma, and Summer, Madison Rocca nearly tackling Chip and Vida, Cedric's dad there, too, slamming into him in a hug, both of their eyes screwed shut with emotion as they clutch at each other—

But Trini only sees one person, really.

Her dad speed-walks toward them, his old duck coat cut up and bloody in places. She opens her clutching hands and the twins surge forward, let free, sprinting, crying, and his knees hit the packed earth ground heavily just before they jump into his arms. In a breath Trini is there too, gripping at any bit of him she can, sandwiching the boys between them tightly and putting their foreheads together.

His voice is low, a whisper trying to control for the way Trini can feel him shaking against them, " _Are you guys okay?_ "

" _Are_ we _okay?_ " Trini mumbles, shaking her head. " _Are_ you _okay?_ "

He tips back a little on his knees, searching their eyes. " _I'm okay, of course. Always am_."

" _You're bleeding_ ," Trini breathes, plucking at his jacket gently.

" _It's not all mine, honey. I will explain once we're all back at the tent_."

With that he stands up abruptly and hauls the boys into his arms. Grabs her hand. And before she can say anything, he turns on the spot.

A pressing, suffocating tension squeezes around her, sucking all the air from her lungs. In an instant they've appeared right next to the Moran's tent, and her dad tugs on her hand gently and walks them in, where there is already a whole lot of commotion: injured adults are slumped in chairs or up against the great wood beams that hold the tent up, people in better shape are trying to help, and medical supplies are flying through the air from one person to the next by magic.

Trini looks around the bright space in a bit of a daze before her dad guides them to sit in a big circle of people who have congregated together on the floor on the right, the large dining table plenty crowded already.

Her dad sits cross-legged and shrugs his jacket off, wincing a little, and Trini parks herself directly in front of him, lurching away to grab a roll of gauze from the bowl in the middle of the circle. She looks down at his shirt—formerly a crisp white, now sporting a vivid patch of red splashed across the left side of his ribs. As he tips back to pull it off Trini sees that the waistband of his jeans directly below the wound is a dark maroon colour as well; it's been bleeding for some time.

She runs her thumb across the stubble on his cheekbone and clicks her tongue—there's already a dark bruise blooming under one of his eyes—then puts his shirt aside and starts to look around for some kind of cleaning agent when a little tin is pressed against her bicep.

Gia stands above her, urging her to take it with a sad smile.

"Thanks," Trini says, unscrewing the cap.

Gia squeezes her shoulder and hands her a clean wet cloth as well. "Hosting duties extend to now," she replies, then pauses, brow twitching as her eyes fall on his face. "Hang on, we've something for that—" she walks over to the kitchen and brings another little tin back over in seconds, squatting down to put it on the floor beside Trini. "Bruise remover. Should help."

Trini meets her eyes. "Thank you, honestly."

Gia waves her off, striding away to continue handing things out, and Trini starts dabbing at the gash in her dad's side, which is still bleeding profusely. After a moment she stops and just presses the whole cloth to it, soon using the entire roll of gauze (and then another) to secure it in place very, very tightly.

Trini stares at her handiwork, unsatisfied but not in a position to do any better of a patch job, and lets a long breath out. " _What happened?_ " she asks in Spanish, moving to start on his eye instead.

His chest rises and falls in a large sigh, eyes a bit glazed over. Trini waits as he hesitates, seemingly making an effort to gather his thoughts.

She's working on his eye for half a minute before he begins, " _We Apparated down there to find that the crowd was quite large, full of mainly intoxicated people who had come over to see the source of the commotion_." Trini watches him carefully; his voice is slow and slurring a little, though she knows he's entirely sober. " _The Death Eaters' numbers kept swelling—more and more of them appearing in the middle of it all—and us and a number of others were trying to get to them._ "

Her dad shifts a little and grits his teeth, hand moving in something like a reflexive spasm toward the gash on his side before he seems to think better of touching it, dropping his hand into his lap instead. " _But they had that muggle family in the air, see. Nobody wanted to start shooting spells anywhere in case we hit them on accident, or made them fall, or something else. And with the crowd around it was nearly impossible to move._ "

He pauses, clenching his jaw a few times. Moves his hand from his lap forward a few inches to put his fingers on her knee. " _You know how some people get when they drink, and especially at sporting events... we tried to push through quickly, politely at first, but then there were blows being thrown every which way because people were drunk and hot-headed. Wands started appearing, people trying to fight the Ministry wizards and us. Was a right sodding mess._ "

" _Fuckers_ ," Trini mutters, now layering the bruise remover potion on his cheekbone generously.

" _Curse Knut_ ," Dante blurts, voice barely audible. More of an automatic response, if the look of surprise on his own face is any indication. Trini bops her knee into his gently, silently promising to put a few Knuts in the glass Swear Jar they keep on the fireplace mantle at home as penance for cursing.

Her dad hums. " _We got to the Death Eaters eventually, some of whom you could tell were just_ itching _to fight someone, and spells started flying. In such close quarters it was pandemonium—one of them hit a tent with_ Expulso _, it must have been, and blew the thing up like a bomb._ " Trini's eyes go wide and he shakes his head. " _Nobody was inside, but some people got hurt in the blast._ "

Gia and her mum come over to sit beside them then, fixing to do the same thing that they're doing, given Mrs. Moran—only in a grey tank top herself, now—has a gash in her shoulder and a split lip to match. She sighs heavily as Gia starts cleaning her shoulder and smiles at Trini's dad. "Look at our wains, fussing over us," she says softly.

Trini tries to smile politely but only manages a twitch of her lips, not looking at Mrs. Moran but at her dad's wound, which has already started to bleed through her makeshift dressing.

"I was just filling Trini in," her dad says in English, tipping his head and torso in Mrs. Moran's direction and giving her a lopsided smile, falling a bit further than Trini figures he intended to.

Trini gently sticks her arm out to steady him, noting that he looks paler now. He puts a hand on Enrique's head gently and ruffles his hair, giving him a comforting smile.

"Mrs. Moran," Trini asks, gesturing to her dad. "Do we have anyone in here who has Healer training?"

Gia's mum shakes her head. "No, but we've the next best thing—" she gestures to a woman crouched in front of one of the Irish players' mum's, who looks to be resetting her broken nose, "Bridget there is one of the mediwizards from the match—for the World Cup, they use the staff already employed by each national team. She's one of Ireland's and is very good."

Squinting, Mrs. Moran peers around the tent for a moment before waving a little wildly to someone—so much similar to Gia that Trini can't help but grin a little.

Mr. Moran comes speeding over a few moments later.

"Dear," Mrs. Moran says sweetly, nodding over at the mediwizard, "would you please get Bridget over here?" She gestures at Trini's dad's ribs and Mr. Moran nods seriously, his thick eyebrows knitting together so closely that they look like one big reddish-grey caterpillar. He peels off, reaching the mediwizard and talking to her, pointing over at them and nodding.

"Thank you. I could've gone over—" Trini starts, but Mrs. Moran reaches across the couple feet of space between them and grips her shoulder.

"She works for the team, love. It'll be quicker if he does it."

And true to her words, not a minute later Bridget comes over with Mr. Moran on her heels. With her lime green medical bag in hand, she smiles down at Trini's dad. "Hello, you must be Mike," she says kindly, and Trini backs up from him a little to give her space to work, gesturing for Dante and Enrique to come sit with her.

"How did this happen?" Bridget asks, squatting in front of him. She begins to poke at his wound with a blunt silver instrument the size and shape of a pencil, which emits clicking and whirring noises intermittently.

"Not entirely sure, if I'm honest," Trini's dad replies, still not sounding completely present. "Reckon it was a graze from a spell but I can't be sure. Could very well've been from something sharp.

Bridget nods. "If it's properly cursed, then this isn't exactly my area of expertise. But I'm going try to put a clotting potion on it, and I'll give you this now—" she takes a ruby red liquid in a clear vial out from her bag, "and ask you to drain it, please. I think it's right time we get some of that lost blood replenished."

Trini's dad does as he's asked and Bridget nods, continuing to prod gently at the gash, biting her lip. "Why don't you lot chat while I do this? Help keep your mind off it, Mike."

"You can keep telling us what happened if you want, dad," Trini says, then looks at Bridget. "Er, should he be talking?"

Bridget nods. "Better he is. Any kind of engagement." She pauses, looking up and meeting his eyes. "This is going to hurt a little."

Her dad nods and Trini puts a grounding hand on his arm. "So the tent had just exploded from that Death Eater's spell..." she prompts.

He hums, formulating his thoughts for a moment before speaking, "Everyone kept… fighting. The Ministry people were trying to either apprehend the Death Eaters or get the muggle family down safely while the rest of us tried to subdue them. A few got Stunned or knocked out, but then one of them set the Dark Mark in the woods—"

"What?!" Trini exclaims, voice coming out more shrill than she intended.

Because she's read plenty about the Dark Mark, but she never thought one would be _cast_ in her lifetime. The implications are horrifying.

Her dad shakes his head. "No, no. Nobody was killed, I don't think. And we don't know who did it—they weren't caught."

"I work for the Ministry, Trini," Mrs. Moran adds, giving her a placating look. "We all Apparated there as soon as we saw it go up. A whole host of us sent Stunners into the woods and came up with nothing." She hesitates, frowns. "There was an elf there with a wand, mind, but the consensus was that she simply had the misfortune of being in the wrong place at the wrong time."

Trini's brow furrows, watching Bridget start to spread a silvery salve on her dad's wound.

"But that's the thing—" her dad says, wincing a little as Bridget works, "as soon as the Mark went up, it's like the Death Eaters couldn't Disapparate out of there fast enough. And I'm certain it wasn't some signal for them to leave—you could tell by how they were moving. It was jerky, panicked. They picked up those who had been Stunned or injured and Disapparated quicker than we could all close in."

Mrs. Moran nods. "So... we aren't sure what that was all about," she says slowly. "Perhaps to set the Mark after the vanquishing of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is disrespectful, or it carries a cursed penalty that we are not aware of? We can only speculate."

Trini nods and her eyes go a little unfocused, still bewildered that the Mark was cast. And she looks around at everyone else in the tent not really seeing, not really taking it in properly; like reading a page then stopping, realising you processed none of it at all. Because her mind is elsewhere: sifting through old articles, passages from books on the history of the Dark Arts, little bits about the war her dad had told her over the years. Trying to link all of that somehow to the events of tonight.

And Voldemort is gone, certainly—vanquished just a few months after she was born.

So what was this? Some drunk Death Eaters trying to relive their glory days?

Why?

Why _now_?

.

When they walk into their house early the next morning, Trini lets out a heavy breath. Because here is their front room, with low light from gas lanterns reflecting off tan-painted walls in glowing sunny mandalas, bookshelves full, her dad's favourite chair with the old goose lamp, dark sofas grouped around their massive fireplace with the coffee table between, smattered with an assortment of things: an empty water glass, a book in progress, a tiny cactus that waves at them as they arrive.

She waves back at it and breathes in slowly. Smells like home.

"Anything you need, Trini, you send us word," Mr. Moran says, deep voice insistent. He gently places Trini's dad's rucksack and duffel just inside the front door and begins to walk backwards on their drive. "If more urgent, you have our address. Come by Floo any time of day or night."

"Thanks sir," Trini returns sincerely.

Mr. Moran nods at her, dark amber eyes incredibly warm. "Expect an owl from us later today, pup. We'll be in touch." He steps back a few more paces, limping down the drive to clear the Anti-Apparition Charm that surrounds their house. Trini gives him a small smile as she shuts the front door softly, and a _pop_ sounds when he Disapparates a few moments later.

Stepping into the house proper, Trini drops her bag with a _thud_ , uncaring to be careful anymore, and grabs her dad's good arm to hoist it over her shoulders again, barely holding him up at all with their height difference. Mr. Moran had helped him most of the way, insistent on accompanying them back, and she couldn't be more grateful for his help.

The two of them shuffle carefully together to his favourite chair, and she helps lower him into it.

Trini lays a blanket over him, raising it in a jerky motion so it's suspended momentarily in the air like a tarp in the wind, spreading it out with a _thwap_ before she lets it fall around him gently. He's pale, sweating, and hurting, but the Irish mediwizard said he should be okay.

If he gets feverish, her instructions are to take him to St. Mungo's.

Trini stands above him for a few moments, just watching. Kwanza comes over and bops his snout into her dad's hand, seemingly knowing not to be too full of energy at this moment.

" _Honey, don't be so serious_ ," her dad murmurs, petting Kwanza. " _I'm just fine. Don't let this put a damper on the match for you, or any of it. Please._ "

Trini sighs, head tilting to the side unconsciously. " _I think I've separated all of it in my mind already_ ," she says quietly, then pauses, internally poking with a stick at the confused, cluttered pile that is her own feelings, trying to find the words to describe them hidden somewhere, perhaps underneath it all. " _Not on purpose though. Feels like the good parts and the bad parts happened with years between them_."

Her dad nods. " _We are going to continue to talk about this once I can provide proper, fatherly insight_ ," he says sincerely, taking her hand and squeezing it. " _It will take some time to process the shock of what happened, but we're going to work through it._ " Trini nods, still feeling a bit dazed, and he looks to the boys then. Voice croaking a little, he says, " _Why don't you two go shower so you feel nice and clean, then have a little sleep?_ "

Enrique rubs at the side of his face and Dante nods like his head is on a swivel. Both exhausted.

Trini pats her dad's shoulder and grabs him a glass of water from the kitchen, placing it next to him on the side table carefully. Gestures to the boys, sweeping them out before her and grabbing her rucksack from the floor before shepherding them upstairs.

It's not a far way up but it takes her much longer than usual due to her legs feeling like lead, and she reaches the second floor with one last lurch.

Walking into the twins' room—moving depictions of cartoon dinosaurs on the walls, an enchanted train set that whistles at them twice in greeting—she waits as they grab clean clothes and putter past her back out into the hallway to make their way to the bathroom together. By past agreement, one sits on the floor and waits for the other to shower, then they switch. They're old enough to do it on their own by now, and this way is the safest.

The bathroom door swings closed to where just a small sliver of space is visible, not shut entirely, and she nods to herself, moving into her room. With her body steeped in frustration she pulls the drapes open with a bit more force than intended, the scraping sound they make against the mounting rod more unpleasant than usual, cutting through the quiet.

Trini screws up her face in a grimace and grips her sleeve.

The view of the countryside calms her though. The sky's getting brighter, vivid pinks and yellows preparing to welcome the morning sun. She takes a deep breath. Holds it. Lets it out.

As the boys shower she unpacks her bag by upending it like a dramatic arsehole, dumping the entire contents onto the carpeted floor of her bedroom.

Amongst the pile and peeking out from underneath her dad's bloodied white t-shirt is the tiny Ireland flag she was waving like an adrenaline-addled maniac the entire match. It attempts to draw her attention, tries to remind her of everything that happened before the riots. She bends at the waist and scoops the t-shirt up, meaning to go grab the rest of her dad's soiled clothes and get them washed. The blood should come out, and with any luck they'll be good as new again.

And it all really is okay. Everyone is safe and her dad is going to recover. It's more the implications that are getting to her.

Whatever this all means, it's nothing good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track: back where i belong (feat. avicii) by otto knows.
> 
> get ready for some kim pov next, folks!
> 
> fun fact 1: in HP canon, there IS a female player on the Irish Quidditch team with the last name Moran. it's the little things, you know?
> 
> fun fact 2: if you read closely in your own copy of harry potter and the goblet of fire, you may JUST find a certain Mrs. Moran mentioned there, though not by name! she works for the ministry, remember. caught winky in the woods with the others. notice she left the tent still wearing her _long woollen dressing gown_? keep that identifier in mind, and you'll find her on page 117 & 118 of GoF (in my copy, at least. not sure about the american versions). chapter nine, 'the dark mark'. it's a short few lines: she basically tells crouch he's off his rocker (softly) then makes a comment about the perp Disapparating. the more you know!
> 
> note -- there will usually be more time in-between chapters, but today (27 july) is trini's dad's birthday! thought I'd put this one up for the sake of it because he features so heavily. hope you all are enjoying the story so far, and thanks for reading!


	4. Light On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/5AdnkoZJuRJCYqYBIzSqFb?si=bZ6etmlsRlyJo2KHMTARIA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"---inform you that the inter-house Quidditch Cup will not take place this year."

_paRDON._

Suddenly very awake, Kim's head snaps up from where it had been resting on her hand. She was dozing lightly, tuned out of Dumbledore's opening speech in favour of succumbing to a pumpkin pasty-overload haze.

Her eyes flit around the Great Hall in horror, and judging by everyone's faces, what she heard was not a pudding-induced hallucination.

Quidditch is _cancelled_?

Someone pokes her shoulder lightly. "You alright there, Hotshot? Look like you're gonna pass out."

Kim turns to see Terence Higgs peering at her with concern from his place to her right. He had taken to calling her a whole host of (not unkind) nicknames in her first year on the Quidditch team; as she was the youngest player at the time it had come with the territory, and 'Hotshot' stuck.

He lost his place on the squad due to Malfoy buying his Seeker spot in her second year, but he still practised with them as a substitute, and they remained friends all the same.

Just as she's about to respond to him the main doors of the Great Hall _clang_ open, revealing a cloaked figure who stands there for a moment, still, before lowering their hood. Kim instantly recognises his face as he begins to limp into the hall: Mad-Eye Moody.

Lovely.

She certainly noticed the empty seat at the Professor's table earlier; a famed Auror will be an interesting addition to the staff.

As Moody makes his way up the length of the hall Kim drifts into Terence's space slightly, nudging his shoulder and letting out a long sigh. "Ter, come on. The Cup was cancelled two years ago, what reason could they have for doing it again?"

Terence looks at a loss. "I don't know... maybe there was some kind of accident?"

His words stir her memory a bit as her mind flashes back to last year's Quidditch season, and she feels her brain reaching as if trying to recall something. It's on the tip of her consciousness—the feeling is reminiscent of walking into a room and realising you've forgotten why you're there.

_Accidents..._

Ah.

Lost in thought, her gaze had wandered over to the Hufflepuff table. After spacing out for a moment her eyes focus as she finds who her subconscious was apparently looking for: the girl she hastily introduced herself to last spring (with the adrenaline-boosted courage that only a Quidditch win could provide) is looking up at Dumbledore intently, her brow furrowed in clear disapproval of his announcement.

Kim smiles despite the internal drama that is her Quidditch feelings. Because the girl is all kinds of beautiful already, but with her brow furrowed like that?

_That's just unfair._

Shaking her head a little to bring herself back to reality, Kim redirects her gaze up to the Professor's table and tunes back into what's being said by Dumbledore, addressing the hall and smiling down at all of them with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, "---an event which has not been held for over a century. It is my very great pleasure to inform you that the Triwizard Tournament will be taking place at Hogwarts this year." 

.

Monday morning finds Kim walking near the back of the group of Slytherin fourth-years snaking their way down to Hagrid's cabin. She's always enjoyed Care of Magical Creatures, but she can't bring herself to be excited about it given the circumstances.

They tread the path with the lush sloping lawns flanking them on either side, a light late summer breeze brushing the grass gently, and Kim walks in silence amongst the chatter of her Housemates around her.

"Alright, Kim?" comes a familiar voice.

Rose Ortiz walks into her peripherals, a toothpick protruding from her mouth, flashing a half-smirk that masks the effort of carrying both the large book in her hands and a laden rucksack on her shoulder.

Kim exhales, the held tension in her body releasing a little. She's come to realise that constantly being geared up for a fight is exhausting.

Her fault though. Nothing to be done now.

"Hey," Kim returns, looking over at Rose with a soft smile. Her dark hair is a bit longer than it was last year, ending just below her shoulders, though she still sports the choppy bangs that always tend to fall into her eyes.

"Don't worry, okay?" Rose says gently, giving Kim a knowing look.

And Kim sighs again, because Rose is a friend that she really, really doesn't deserve. There were multiple times last year—more than Kim can count on two hands—where Rose was her saving grace.

Because the first time Kim cried herself to sleep in the middle of the night, she was alone. Just her and her thoughts; her and the echoes of the taunts she'd endured that day, desperately trying to keep quiet as Amanda Clarke, her ex-best friend turned personal bully, slept just across the room.

But the second time she found herself sobbing into her pillow with a horrible ache in her chest, Kim looked up through tears to see the green silk curtain of her four-poster being pulled back carefully.

And Rose stood there with a box of tissues and a question in her eyes.

Kim was overwhelmed in that moment; so used to being the person who has a strong spine and thick skin, who is supposed to be okay with walking alone through darkness. That was the path she chose, after all.

Before she had even begun to protest, though, Rose climbed into bed next to her with a shake of her head and a look on her face that communicated that the arrangement was non-negotiable. Wrapped her arms around Kim and held her tightly. And to Kim's surprise (and despite her attempt to look tough, which lasted all of two minutes), she had cried even harder with Rose holding her. As if having someone there to help you pick up the pieces gives a kind of permission to fall apart completely.

Rose was there for her that night and would continue to be for every bad one after that. There were a lot, and Kim couldn't be more thankful for her.

"I'm not worried," Kim mutters.

Rose scoffs. "Oh, come off it," she says, pulling a face. "You think that just because we don't live in the same dorm anymore you can lie to me now? Cheeky business, K."

Kim smiles softly and shakes her head as they come to Hagrid's small cabin on the edge of the Forbidden Forest, striding up to where he's standing, grinning at all of them with a mass of wooden crates at his feet. There are tiny explosions coming from them intermittently, and Kim raises an eyebrow at the sound.

The Gryffindors are already here, most looking apprehensively down into the exploding crates—their expressions tinged with a mixture of curiosity and disgust at the contents—and Rose jerks her head towards them. "Let's find Jason."

"You don't have to escort me," Kim says quietly, tone self-conscious.

"Again, bugger off with that crap," Rose grunts, shooing Kim over to where Jason Scott is sitting perched atop the wood fence that runs around the pumpkin patch with some other Gryffindors.

As they approach Jason sees them and his face lights up in a smile. "Hey," he greets, hopping down and looking at ease as ever, though Kim saw him sit up a little straighter as her House arrived.

"You have her for the rest of the day," Rose says quietly, shaking a finger in Jason's direction. "No ice cream, and she has to be in bed before ten."

Kim shoves Rose lightly, and Jason laughs under his breath as he looks between the two of them with a warm smile.

Pulling a face, Kim mutters, "If this is joint-custody, I choose to stay with neither of you."

"Yes, yes, love you too, K," Jason chirps.

Kim makes a soft kissing noise at him then turns to Rose. "In all seriousness, thank you."

Rose waves her hand dismissively. "Anytime. You know I've got your back." She pauses, turning to walk back towards the rest of the Slytherins. "I'll leave you two to it."

.

" _Blast-Ended_ Skrewts," Jason murmurs haughtily, face pained and shaking his hand as if it's on fire. Class is over and they're walking towards the castle at the back of the pack of Gryffindors and Slytherins, many of whom seem to have similar opinions about the subjects of today's lesson.

Kim stops abruptly and grabs his elbow. "If you'd just quit being so macho and actually let me _look_ at it—" she mutters, tone frustrated.

He stares at her for a moment, then makes a tiny whining noise and holds his hand out obediently. She takes his wrist gently with one hand and reaches into her rucksack with the other, bringing out the little metal box that serves as her first-aid kit.

Having a Healer for a mother rubs off on you, it seems.

Jason pouts down at her as she begins to fuss over the raw, angry-looking burn that covers most of his right palm. "Am I going to die? Leave me here, save yourself," he whines, bringing the back of his uninjured hand to his forehead and miming light-headedness.

"Merlin's pants, you're ridiculous," Kim says fondly, clicking her tongue at his antics. She smudges a thick orange paste on the burn with her fingers, layering it generously, then shoves the little tin at him. "Hold this," she mutters, taking a roll of clean white gauze and beginning to wrap his hand expertly. Once she's finished she ties it off at his wrist, pats it gently, then kisses it. "All better."

"You, love, are the greatest person alive," Jason says, handing her the salve tin back. He sighs heavily, holding his hand gingerly and examining it as they resume their walk back up to the castle. "Holy fuck, it's _cold_. That feels so much better..." he trails off, then pauses.

"WAIT!" he exclaims softly, pausing again for dramatic effect and pointing at Kim wildly with his good hand. "Ma'am, are you a _witch_?"

Kim gives him a deadpan look. "Ha ha ha. You didn't get blasted in the head too, did you?" she mutters, unable to keep herself from laughing.

"I adore you. Thanks, honestly," Jason says, smiling. "Saves me a trip to the hospital wing. I don't wanna get Hagrid in trouble with this rubbish, anyway."

Kim hums. The class response to the Skrewts had been less than ideal, what with how many people got injured. And she can't say she _blames_ them given the circumstances, but some kids were acting entirely out of line. Hagrid doesn't deserve that.

They soon arrive in the Great Hall for lunch, plopping down at the end of the Gryffindor table in a way that's become routine for them. 

Kim takes her copy of the _Daily Prophet_ out of her bag and dishes food onto her plate absentmindedly, scanning the headlines for an article to read. Across from her, Jason begins emitting tiny whines every few seconds like a sad puppy, and she glances up to look at him over her paper with an eyebrow raised.

Jason's pouting as he looks pointedly between his injured hand and his empty plate. After a few seconds he reaches for the dish of lamb chops and potatoes that sits between them on the table, struggling to spoon some onto his plate with his good hand awkwardly.

She smirks, bringing her newspaper up to block his view of her and gazing back down at her chosen article.

_He's a big boy, he can do it himself._

A moment later there's a very wet _thud_ , though, followed by more whines—he must have dropped a chunk of food and missed his plate—and he starts mumble-singing as if through tears, "' _And I'm never gonna dance again... guilty HAND has got no rhythm_.'" His voice increases in volume as he presumably leans across the table, clearly now singing an inch away from her raised newspaper wall, "' _Though it's easy to pretend, I know you're noT A FOOOOOOL—_ '"

She ruffles her newspaper with a huff and folds it up, smacking him on the head with it. "You're absurd, Jason Scott. ['Careless Whisper'](https://open.spotify.com/track/6KsgCYcZKPcBRDNGhiZWRR?si=rYBJw6FwTx-NY5BLxsBnJw)? Really?"

"Honey, if you love me won't you help me? Don't leave me like this," he drawls, not chastised by the smack in the least and holding out the serving spoon for her to take.

Kim stares at it for a moment before she grabs it, smiling at him and chuckling. "You _do_ know how much I love you though, don't you?" she asks, spooning a Jason-sized helping of food onto his plate.

"I do," he answers, all joking gone from his voice.

"Good. But I'm not going to do like, the choo-choo train bit and spoon feed you like an infant." She pauses. "I know you're not a lefty but you can do it. I believe in you."

It's then that Billy Cranston comes into her peripherals, zooming around Jason to sit beside him.

"Alright guys?" Billy says lightly, closing the buckles on his navy blue backpack and stowing it at his feet. "How was Care of Magical Creatures?"

And Jason's entire demeanour changes, coughing once as he straightens his back and replies, "It was okay. The creatures Hagrid has us working with are these right nasty things, though."

Kim tries to contain her laughter at how the drama seems to have evaporated from him in an instant. "They sting and shoot fire, Billy," she explains, then gestures in Jason's direction. "Jase got quite the burn from one of them."

With a look of deep concern appearing on his face, Billy raises his eyebrows and turns his whole body to Jason on the bench.

"It's nothing," Jason says in a nonchalant voice, bringing his bandaged hand out from his lap and waving it around. "Kim's patched me up, it's going to be just fine."

"What happened?" Billy asks, holding his own hand out palm up. Jason looks up at him to be sure it's alright to touch him, then gently places his hand there and allows it to be inspected. Without taking his eyes off of Jason's hand, Billy inclines his head in Kim's direction. "Did you use that strong-smelling orange salve, Kim?"

Kim smiles at their interaction. "Yeah _—_ same stuff my mum uses at the hospital. It's self-sterilising so it should take care of any venom or dirt that was in there, and it has a cooling effect. Give it a few days and it'll be right as rain."

"I've always loved that expression," Billy says softly, more to himself than anyone. "Right as rain..." he trails off, running his fingers gently over the bandage. Kim searches Jason's face intently, and she could swear his ears are turning a _little_ bit red.

Billy carefully gives Jason's hand back to him and nods. "I'm sorry that happened. You should've been wearing gloves."

Kim shrugs. "Nobody was, but yeah. I think I'm going to start bringing my dragon hide gloves with me to Creatures in the future."

Billy nods seriously. "Jason, you do that too. I will as well. Can't be too careful," he says, spooning some lamb chops onto his plate and plucking a roll from the basket.

"How was Moody?" Kim asks. Admittedly, she's curious about Mad-Eye. He seems like a strange pick for a teacher.

Billy chews slowly, clearly considering his words, then swallows. "Honest? I don't think I like him very much."

Kim blinks. It's fairly rare for Billy not to like a teacher, so when he doesn't, it's usually for good reason.

A famed Auror, though? Her interest is piqued.

Jason's seems to be too. "Why do you say that? Was he an arse?"

Billy shakes his head, though he still looks uncertain. "Not exactly. But he quite literally killed a spider in front of the class by way of the Killing Curse."

Kim and Jason stare at him, jaws open and horror-struck. "What do you mean, 'By way of the Killing Curse?'" she asks slowly, stunned.

"I mean that exactly, Kim. Literally, as I said."

Jason finds his voice, "That seems awfully not all right to me."

Billy nods, looking troubled. "He Imperiused the first one, then tortured another with the Cruciatus Curse." He pauses, a muscle in his jaw twitching. "It was horrible."

Kim pales. One of Billy's idiosyncrasies—as him and his mum, Candace, call them—is that he's deeply affected by the suffering or mistreatment of other living things. And that's not necessarily different from other people (as Kim, for example, once punched a boy on the playground when she was young because he purposefully stamped on an anthill), but as is the case with Billy generally, it's not that he's different from them in some alien sense—it's just that his senses and reactions are more pronounced. Something like an unpleasant sound might simply bother Kim or Jason, but be excruciating for Billy's brain to try and process.

And Billy certainly has a heightened response where the well-being of living creatures is concerned. It's so much so that, by Jason's account, Billy was so horrified at the prospect of turning mice into snuffboxes in their first year that he had flat-out refused to do it, then proceeded to lock himself in a caretaker's cupboard outside of the Transfiguration classroom (apparently not on purpose), and curl up in the corner.

Professor McGonagall knelt at the door and patiently explained that the mice were not being hurt in the process, mostly via bits of parchment pushed through the keyhole, given Billy was covering his ears with his hands.

He eventually calmed down, and McGonagall reportedly gave him a book on the subject and allowed him to sit at her desk and read while she taught the rest of the lesson. Afterward, she spent over an hour with Billy, explaining the entire process to him in detail so that he would be completely at ease. She even lent him a book of laws relating to the treatment of live creatures in magical learning.

Looking at Billy now, Kim finds her stomach churning at the thought of him sitting through that lesson, feeling as if she'd very much like to throw McGonagall's book of animal treatment laws at Moody's face. "Billy, you know you can leave if something like that ever happens, right?" she asks quietly.

Billy nods solemnly. "I know. But it's a lesson—I didn't want to just miss it. Something that heavy will probably be on the exam."

"Fuck the exam," Jason spits. "I'm going to report him, I don't care how famous he is."

"Jase..." Kim starts.

"No, K," he mutters, fuming. "Listen, I understand we can't be sheltered forever—there's a reason why Defense is a practical class. You need to be exposed to spells and practise them and everything. It can't all be theory and I _know_ that." He pauses, taking a deep breath. "But those curses are Unforgivable for a reason. They're illegal. I know there's no guarantee that some dark wizard won't come 'round and hit us with them one day, but I can't get behind this."

Kim sighs. She wasn't intending on arguing with him at all—she knows he's _right_.

Jason sits there shaking his head, and Kim hums softly at him. "I'll report him with you," she says gently, looking over and meeting Billy's eyes as well. She pauses, organising her thoughts. "There are certain horrors that you learn about but hope beyond hope that you never have to actually see. I don't think a teacher, no matter how much shit he's done or been through, should be allowed to expose anyone—let alone kids our age—to any of that in the name of learning. As part of mandatory curriculum, no less. I don't give a fuck what he uses either; those spiders were still living things with a consciousness. It's incredibly cruel."

She pauses. "We won't mention your name or anything Billy, and we'll wait to say anything until after my class tomorrow afternoon. Maybe he won't do it again."

Jason looks at Billy. "But we're reporting this regardless," he says, voice soft.

Billy nods then drains his glass of water. "I wasn't intending to, but your reasoning is sound. There were other people who—by the looks on their faces coming out of class, at least—felt the same as me, but I didn't loiter very long afterwards to discuss it."

"I don't blame you," Kim says, then pauses to finish off her roll. "On the _plus_ side, I'm certain we can expect a curse-free learning environment from Professor Vector today."

Jason scoffs, smiling. "You just made a maths pun. Here, in my House," he says, gesturing down the Gryffindor table.

"Puns are welcome in my House Kim, shall we move there?" Billy quips, nodding towards the Ravenclaw table with a twinkle in his eye.

Jason pouts. "Don't leave me."

" _There_ he is," Kim says, grinning at him. "I was afraid we were gonna have to deal with Tough Jason for the rest of the day."

Jason just glares at her as Billy smiles and takes something out of his robes. "The bell's going to ring in seven minutes," he says, glancing down at his silver pocket watch. It was his father's, and Kim has always admired how handsome it is.

She nods and shoves the last bit of her potatoes into her mouth.

They all make their way out of the Great Hall and towards the Arithmancy classroom, arriving before the vast majority of the class.

"Billy, you okay to sit in the middle again this year?" Jason asks.

"Yeah, that's fine."

Jason leads them to a row of seats on the left and they all sit. He goes to reach for his tattered bag with his injured hand on reflex and winces, and Billy takes it from him without a word, unpacking his writing materials and textbook slowly.

"I can do that—"

Billy just shakes his head, smiling. "You can unpack my things a few days from now when you're feeling better."

And watching them, Kim smiles too. Because Billy certainly doesn't want anything in return for helping Jason, but he knows him well enough to understand he won't ask for help. On the whole Jason tends to reserve his pouty, dramatic side for Kim and Tommy Oliver, exclusively, given they've all known each other since they were in diapers.

He's starting to be more open with Billy, though, and it warms Kim's heart.

.

The next day the three of them are sat in Muggle Studies, with Jason sprawled across a few seats as the lecture comes to an end. It's not a super large class, and Professor Burbage is one of the most easy-going teachers at Hogwarts. It's cool material most of the time, but this morning's History of Magic lecture was draining enough.

Everyone around them starts to get up, stretching and eyelids heavy, and a Gryffindor boy with tall spiky black hair pops his head over the seats from behind them to look at Jason. "Falling asleep there, babe?"

Jason looks up and flashes a lazy smile. "Go bother someone else," he grunts, tone jokingly exasperated.

The boy—one of Jason's roommates, Kim knows—makes a kissing noise at him and grins. "Touchy. Was just wondering if you still wanna join us in the library after lunch."

Jason huffs and nods, sitting up and spinning to grab his messenger bag. "Yeah, mate. These two are about to leave me, and you very well know that if I don't have people around me, I die."

Kim scoffs. "Like some kind of extrovert shark? Always has to be moving?" she mutters, raising her eyebrow at Jason. Hums. "Don't think you'd want to be with me where I'm going, anyway, Jase. I have Defense next."

Not wanting to be impolite, she looks up at the newcomer to acknowledge him as part of the conversation, and he makes a sympathetic face down at her. "Heard how that class went for the Ravenclaws—seems brutal," he says, shaking his head. "I wish you luck."

"Thank you," Kim replies easily. "For the moment though, lunch."

They all get up together as a pretty Gryffindor girl sticks her head into the classroom. "Zack, I swear to god, you are the slowest person on the planet," she calls, shooting him a glare. "Sometime in the next century would be fantastic."

The boy nods, adjusting his bag on his shoulder and starting to walk towards the door. "It's Jason that's slow. Yell at him."

Jason elbows Zack and they all follow him into the corridor, where they're met by a knot of five Gryffindors.

A tall brunette boy with floppy hair and an easy smile gives Zack a nod. "The prodigal son returns," he drawls, leaning against the wall.

The girl holding his hand, a blonde with striking blue eyes, smirks at Zack before looking at Jason. "I don't blame you for falling asleep, Scott," she says lightly. "Burbage is the shite, but those lectures can get a bit dry."

"Super interesting for us muggle-born folks, though," her boyfriend adds, shrugging and swinging their interlinked hands gently before he steps toward Kim and Billy, sticking his free hand out. "Rocky DeSantos. Roommate of these idiots—" he jerks his head between Jason and Zack. "We've met a couple times in passing."

Kim shakes his hand and nods as Billy gives him a wave. "We have. Kim Hart, and you know Billy," she returns kindly.

"Sky Tate," the blonde girl says, nodding at Kim with a small smile.

The good-looking girl who initially yelled at Zack nods at Kim as well, though hers is more of an upwards jerk of the head. "Mackenzie Hartford. Nice last name, Hart."

Kim smiles and they all start walking down the corridor together. "Yours isn't so bad either. Reckon it'd be better a bit shorter, though," she chirps, then realises how flirtatious that sounded.

"You never know, you two might be related," Hermione Granger says from slightly in front of them, turning her head and raising her eyebrows a little. There's a sly smile playing at her lips, and Kim's stomach does a jaunty little flip as their eyes meet.

 _Whoops_.

Admittedly, she's had a tiny, _tiny_ crush on Granger for ages. Who couldn't, when you're always jockeying for top scores in the year? Nothing stokes a fancy like a little competitiveness.

Mackenzie shrugs. "We'll have to make sure that's not the case before we get married," she quips easily.

Kim chuckles and scoffs, internally very much appreciating the banter. She's want for it these days, as sad as that sounds. Interacting with new people casually without having to be on the lookout for trouble is something she's missed. It's ease, peace.

"Aaaaand there it is," Parvati Patil mutters, shaking her head.

Mackenzie laughs, glancing sideways at Kim with her mouth still a bit open. "What! That would be an important thing to check for!"

Kim chuckles too. "It would," she says, looking at Mackenzie with a playful, suggestive raise of her eyebrow. Mackenzie shakes her head and looks forward, clearing her throat and blinking rapidly; cheekbones a _tiny_ bit more flushed than they were a minute ago, to Kim's delight.

"Heaven forbid you don't hit on every fit girl you meet, Mack," Jason mutters, throwing his arm around Kim's shoulders as they all come to the Grand Staircase, the labyrinthine flights stretching out above and below them, awash with chattering students making their way down to lunch. "But she's mine. You're too late, bub."

Mackenzie clicks her tongue. "Better luck next time."

.

Later that night Kim is sat up against the headboard of her four-poster, doing her reading for History of Magic with a cup of tea in her hand. Defense Against the Dark Arts had gone just as expected, with Professor Moody demonstrating the Unforgivable Curses in the same fashion Billy described. She left feeling sick to her stomach and skipped supper altogether, opting for a packet of rice crisps and a couple satsumas instead, now enjoying having her dorm room to herself while her roommates are elsewhere in the castle.

The lake makes a quiet sloshing sound against the two massive floor-to-ceiling windows across the room, and her emerald bedsheets smell like fresh laundry. She takes a deep breath; her tea is warm, and the whole setting is working to make her feel much better.

Closing the book and marking her spot with a scrap bit of parchment, Kim reaches up to the lamp just above her bed and pulls at the little silver tassel that serves as a switch. At once her space is illuminated, blending into the soft green glow of the lake that's always present in the room thanks to the windows. She stretches, gaze drawn to a tiny school of silver fish swimming by outside as she twists to grab her rucksack from its place leaning against her bed.

Taking out a fresh page of parchment and a fountain pen—having an inkpot on her bed has always ended in disaster—she begins a letter to her mum, the first of what's to be weekly correspondences. Given everything that happened at school last year, her mum had insisted on regular letters to keep in the loop.

Kim wets the tip of the pen with her tongue and writes, telling her mum all about the Triwizard Tournament and the lessons she's gone to so far this week. She tells her about Jason and Tommy and Billy, about Rose and Terence, among others, with the finished product coming out more like a diary entry than a letter.

With a final paragraph asking about her mum's job, the pets, and her grandparents, Kim twitches her fingers to fold it up neatly by magic and swings her legs out of bed.

Padding over to the door, she yanks her trainers on and enters the girls dormitory corridor, then takes a deep, settling breath before making her way out into the common room. It hasn't been the best place for her over the last year or so, and she clenches her fist before pulling at the door handle and speeding across the space. There aren't too many people around, and she lets out a sigh of relief as she exits through the sliding stone wall and begins her journey up to the Owlery.

.

The first week continues to speed by, with Wednesday afternoon arriving to find Kim emerging from an empty classroom, looking around with a measured attempt at casualness.

Satisfied, she hikes her bag further up her shoulder and strides towards the Ancient Runes classroom at a brisk pace.

She nudges the heavy wood door open and glances around the full room—Professor Babbling hasn't arrived yet. With a couple quiet steps she plops down in the nearest open chair, right by the door.

This has been her strategy so far—getting to class right before the bell sounds and leaving as soon as they're dismissed. If people barely notice she's there, they're likely to bother her less. Sitting around before a lesson is all well and good if you have people to chat to, but she doesn't have that luxury in all of her classes.

Not anymore.

So she's made a habit of swooping in quick and leaving just as fast. The hostility is a lot to deal with; it's better like this.

Professor Babbling arrives not thirty seconds after her, sailing up the middle row and dimming the lights around them in preparation for what Kim assumes is some lecturing with help from the projector. And Kim's always enjoyed this class—it's large, but not ridiculously so, and with it being an elective everyone here is actually interested in the subject matter.

For the most part, at least.

As Kim takes her writing materials and textbook out, her eyes flick up to the front and catch a familiar brunette side braid whipping around—a girl sat at the outer edge of the front row, thumbing through her textbook.

Kim's memory stirs and she realises that she remembers Trini Gomez vaguely from last year's class as well, though if her recollection serves, it was usually with a small knot of Hufflepuffs gathered 'round. Kim looks around the room—there aren't a whole lot of Hufflepuffs here, actually.

Continuing to look about, she realises that, admittedly, the class has thinned out since last year, members of her own House included.

A few more seconds of searching and... brilliant. Amanda Clarke is nowhere to be found.

Kim exhales heavily.

_Well, that's a great development._

Professor Babbling starts lecturing and Kim sees Trini's head snap up to listen. Her and Granger—whose hand has just shot up from the opposite side of the room—are the only ones occupying the front row.

Kim smiles to herself. What a nerd.

She spends the rest of class engrossed in the material, lulled into a prime kind of learning trance by Professor Babbling's low voice. It's the first lesson back so it isn't very long, but once the lecture is over she has ink smudged on the side of her palm regardless with her hand cramping uncomfortably.

Despite this, she smiles. Because she has that familiar, light feeling in her chest that comes from learning something she's genuinely interested in.

Babbling dismisses them with a heavy reading assignment for next week's class and Kim starts packing her stuff up with measured haste, still determined to get out before everyone else does.

But internally, she's heavily debating whether she should go say hi to Trini.

She could just walk up casually, right? Go say ' _Remember me?_ '; go say _anything_ at all to her. Because they'd kind of bonded over the couple minutes they chatted after their Quidditch match last year—

The rest of the class starts rising to their feet and a few walk out of the room, and Kim is going to do it.

She's going to do it...

As soon as she sees a couple dreaded people start to come her way, though—two of Amanda's closest friends, Rebecca and Harper, specifically—Kim is out of there like a bat out of hell.

She sighs. Perhaps it's for the best that she doesn't approach Trini today.

Besides, she doesn't want to come off as weird or anything, like: _'Oh hey look we talked that one time and kind of both overshared because there was a weird energy buzzing between us! At least I felt that, did you? No matter, we're in the same class! Let's be friends!_ '

That might be considered a little bit too intense. Maybe next time.

Kim lets out another small sigh as she peels down the corridor, excited to meet the boys in the library and determined to use her free period to get started on her rapidly growing pile of homework.

.

Trini shivers slightly as she walks purposefully down the dungeon corridor that leads to the Potions classroom. Double Potions isn't exactly her idea of a riveting way to spend her Thursday morning, but at least she has a knack for the material.

Tomorrow she has History of Magic first thing for the second time this week, which is infinitely worse.

She crams her banana muffin into her mouth to free up one of her hands (the other is occupied with her giant thermos of coffee) and pushes the door open, which creaks obnoxiously.

Walking into the dim-lit classroom she sees that there are only a few people scattered around. She's twenty minutes early, and she squints as she scans the backs of everyone's heads. Her eyes fall on the person she's looking for—there in their regular spot—and she smiles to herself, continuing to walk between the cauldron-laden tables.

"Hey, Billy," Trini says, sitting down next to a tall Ravenclaw boy at a table at the front of the classroom.

"Hello Trini!" Billy greets, turning his entire body to face her.

"How was your summer?" Trini asks, smiling at him softly as she takes her potions kit and textbook out of her rucksack.

"It was nice. My mum and I spent a lot of time with my grandparents at theirs," he replies, words coming out in rapid-fire. "Otherwise it was fairly ordinary. What about you?"

Trini nods, her eyes warm. "Mine was nice too. Did a lot of hiking with my dad and the twins... and we went to the Quidditch World Cup final together, which was so, so cool." She pauses, frowning slightly. "Well, other than what happened after the match."

Billy nods his head vigorously. "I went to that too! It's too bad we didn't see each other there. I stayed in my friend Jason's tent. It was very unnerving to witness, what happened with the Dark Mark." He pauses, a crease appearing in his brow. "How was it going through that situation with your family? Your brothers are young. That must have been very hard."

Despite the topic they're discussing, Trini can't help but smile a little at Billy's questions. He's one of the most genuine people she's ever met; they aren't incredibly close friends by any means, but she knows that he legitimately cares to know about what he's asking. He remembers the things she says and cares for her as a person.

As far as casual Potions-mates go, it's refreshing.

She nods, then sighs. "I'm sure it was hard for everyone, but our main concern—my dad and I—was, yeah, getting my little brothers out of there. I've never seen my dad like that…" she trails off, frown deepening. "Seeing him go into survival mode so quickly was a harsh reminder that he lived through the war, you know? He knows what people who play with the Dark Mark are like."

Billy nods. "I hope that didn't sour the Cup for you though, we talk all of the time about how much you love Quidditch."

Trini shakes her head. "Nah. I don't think any part of Quidditch could ever sour for me." She chuckles a bit sadly. "Me and Zack have spent every class we have together this week whining because the IHC is cancelled. Dunno I'm gonna do with myself if I'm honest."

"Have you considered playing some pick-up games?" Billy asks.

Trini hums. "Reckon my team Captain might set practises here and there so we all don't get too rusty, which is something at least…" she trails off again, flipping open her textbook. "And Zack and I've been out to the pitch a few times in the last couple days, but it's not the same, you know? One-on-one is a lot different than a match between two teams."

Billy smiles back at her, twirling his quill in his hand. "Well, we haven't been out yet, but Jason and I've been talking about doing that too—playing pick-up games." He pauses for a moment, seemingly considering something. "Maybe all of us could play together? Zack and Jason know each other. It wouldn't be a full spread of two regulation-sized squads, but it might be better than one-on-one."

Trini doesn't even hesitate before nodding. "That'd be brilliant. If it's okay with Jason too, that is." She shrugs, hesitating. "I was thinking I might ask my teammates, but I don't want to bug them or anything. Hopefully we get to scrimmage a little if we end up doing those practices."

"I reckon Jason will think us playing together is a great idea," Billy says.

Trini sighs softly. She isn't really one to be the organiser of social events, or the person who actively tries to get a bunch of people together in one place. When it comes to social interactions, wallflower is her go-to designation; even joining the Quidditch team was a big leap for her. But as much as she has found a home with her team, she still isn't _entirely_ comfortable. At least not enough to ask them all to come out to play with her, which _really_ isn't that big of a deal.

She's getting there, though. Stepping out of her comfort zone is something she's actively been working on, but it has to be done in small steps.

Billy's eyes flit around for a moment, like he's trying to think. "Why don't we do it sometime this weekend before school gears up proper? I will check my schedule and see if Jason has anyone else who would like to play with us. We'll keep it at a small group, but a few more people might be nice."

Trini's stomach tumbles around a little—meeting new people tends to make her nervous. But she'll have Zack there, and she really likes Billy; his friends can't be that bad.

"Okay, that sounds awesome. Count us in," she says, smiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title track is 'Light On' by Maggie Rogers.
> 
> Dumbledores lines at the beginning and end of the first scene are taken directly out of my copy of GoF!
> 
> \---
> 
> If you don't recognise the new characters (Rose, Mackenzie, Sky, Rocky), they're from Power Rangers canon and can be found on the PR wiki, if you're curious about what they look like! I've gender-flipped a couple, but their likeness is the same, mostly. 
> 
> Thanks for reading, friends.


	5. When You Break

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***NOTE: trigger warning for a panic attack.
> 
> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/4NXvMaa0k0f3gCX2JlWAEA?si=NO_XOhL5TEe3VdbEh34Cyg). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Excellent work, Miss Hart," Professor McGonagall says, passing between tables with a sewing pin in her hand as the class works at transfiguring their hedgehogs into pincushions. Kim's just managed to do it after a few unsuccessful tries, and she smiles softly, allowing a bit of pride to flicker in her chest. She knows it's not a race, but being the first in the class to complete the assignment feels kind of nice.

"Thank you, Professor," Kim replies quietly, as Professor McGonagall stops and brings the pin toward the pincushion a little bit tentatively, just in case the Transfiguration didn't manage to change it all of the way.

But given she's just commended Kim, it's likely only a precaution.

The needle goes into the cushion just fine, with no squeaking or fright from it at all, and McGonagall picks it up to examine it closely. After a few moments, she places it on the desk again and transfigures it back. "Once more, if you please," she instructs, gesturing at it before taking a step away from the desk and linking her hands behind her back.

Kim nods and takes a deep breath in and out before pointing her wand at it, focusing on tuning out the noisy classroom around her. As vividly as her brain can muster she pictures exactly what she wants the pincushion to look like, then says the incantation quietly and clearly.

And she feels the corner of her mouth pull up involuntarily at once, because some part of her knows it's successful before she even examines it closely; like she can figuratively hear something clicking into place.

Professor McGonagall nods as she picks it up again. "You have improved the quality," she says slowly, referencing the improvements to the material and the little embellishments Kim added. After a few more seconds of close examination she peers at Kim curiously. "Why?"

Kim shrugs. "Why not? I guess?"

Professor McGonagall surveys her for a moment. "Good answer. Ten points to Slytherin."

"Thank you Professor."

McGonagall inclines her head. "You may use the remainder of the lesson to work on other things, if you so wish," she says, then pauses to send a scrutinising glance around the classroom. Her gaze lingers on Goyle, who, despite being purple in the face with concentration, hasn't managed to change his hedgehog one bit. She looks back down at Kim with her lips pursed pointedly, then speaks again, "We will be on this assignment for at _least_ one more class, so I will likely give you a future essay or something of that nature to begin working on next week."

Kim nods and Professor McGonagall lingers above her, eyes softening all at once. "It's nice to have you back, Kimberly," she says, voice now just barely audible.

With that she continues walking around the classroom, Kim's pincushion still in hand. And Kim watches her, eyes widened just slightly. Stunned at the comment.

Because Transfiguration has been her best subject ever since she started at Hogwarts, but last year she found herself sliding academically in not just this class, but across the board. To know that Professor McGonagall still has some faith in her is... great. A relief. The encouragement is surprising and unexpected.

"Nice one, Hart," Cameron Watanabe whispers from the seat next to her, giving her a small smile before returning to his pincushion—which still mostly resembles a hedgehog, save for it being more square and entirely red.

She smiles back at him then looks over to Rose on her other side, who is muttering under her breath and reading the spell description in her textbook, having managed a very pincushion-looking thing that still has hedgehog spikes along the top.

Kim sits there in silence for a few moments, looking around the room and watching everyone working at the spell, before her gaze falls on Amanda Clarke a few rows in front of her.

And Kim's eyes linger, watching as Amanda talks with the other Slytherin girls grouped around; feeling somehow like she's looking at them from another room. From another planet, even.

Without warning, a familiar pain flares up in her chest at the sight—a splintering, dark thing that presses on her lungs from all sides, trapping her in place—rooting her to the spot as guilt, shame, and complete disgust with herself looms then crashes over her like waves on a worn down shoreline. It all hits her at full speed, forcing its way up her nose, into her sinuses; saltwater stinging her throat like bile, leaving an unpleasant taste in her mouth.

Not falling away either, not dripping off. No, it all grips her relentlessly, unnaturally, shaking her by the throat and looking deep into her eyes. Repeating a whispered, dangerous mantra over and over—

_Someone good could have never done what you did._

She blinks a few times and leans back into her chair discreetly, shutting her eyes for a moment and trying to breathe deeply to little success. With effort she tries to push it all from her mind, but it's all moving too fast for her to catch it.

" _Kim,_ " comes a small insistent hiss from her neck, barely audible over the chatter and bustle of her classmates working around her. " _Kim, I can feel your heart rate spiking. You are alright._ "

Kim shakes her head just barely, back and forth over and over with her eyes still shut, and when she doesn't respond she feels him—her tiny pet corn snake, Ptero—slither off her neck and down the front of her white oxford shirt, brushing the base of her neck with his tail as he does. He proceeds to wrap himself around her torso diagonally like a sash, exerting pressure by constricting in effort to calm her down.

Bowing her head, Kim balls one of her hands into a fist in effort to focus on something else. " _P, I'm okay,_ " she hisses out under her breath, in Parseltongue.

And she knows he hears her but he doesn't move for the next few minutes, only letting up once he feels her heartbeat start to slow.

Because panic attacks are a regular thing for Kim now—brought on almost easily, like she's always teetering _just_ on the edge of a precipice. One intrusive thought or external trigger can tip her headfirst into darkness. And there is always an opportunity to catch herself in those first few moments—mentally slap herself out of it somehow—before she really goes tumbling over the edge, but she manages that fairly infrequently.

Getting better at it though. After everything happened with Amanda last spring Kim could _never_ stop them, often experiencing multiple, full-fledged attacks in a day with no relief. It was all brand new to her and she had no idea how to deal with them back then.

Now, and with Ptero's help especially, she's able to stop them here and there. It's some improvement at least.

" _Thank you, P,_ " she breathes, reaching up to where he's coiled around her neck again to run her finger along his spine gently. To anyone else, he looks like an accessory—a dark green choker necklace or thick bracelet, depending on where he is on her body at the time. His true colour is a hot pink, but this way he can be with her all day long, disguised.

He said that he prefers staying with her over being in his terrarium during the day anyway, so it works out.

And all of the trickery was her mum's idea, given she and Kim both figured it best if he was with her as often as possible. His ability to help bring her down from an impending panic attack is game-changing, invaluable.

" _Of course,_ " Ptero replies, tickling the back of her neck with his tail in an affectionate gesture.

Kim takes a few more deep breaths in and out then fishes her Charms textbook out of her bag, hands a bit shaky, looking to start the reading assignment that Flitwick assigned them a few hours ago.

.

Once the lesson is over Kim bids goodbye to Rose and leaves just as quickly as usual, if not faster, knowing that drawing any kind of attention to herself—good attention, especially—is asking for trouble that she _really_ doesn't want to get into right now.

And she refuses to let her grades suffer any more than they already did last year, so staying quiet or doing mediocre work when she has the ability to excel is not an option. Especially not in her favourite class.

But Kim feels eyes on her as she speeds out of the classroom; as a result her steps are a bit faster, just enough so that it doesn't look like she's running away, all the while feeling like there's a stage spotlight above her along with an even bigger target on her back than usual.

And as Kim strides down the corridor, the space around her growing more crowded by the second with supper-bound students, she takes a deep breath then lets it out. Feeling okay, relatively, at how well she's just done. For the first Transfiguration lesson of the school year, she's off to a good start.

She allows herself to smile a little, and it's precisely then that a cold, piercing shout sounds from behind her; travels, crashing around her ears like a thunderclap, "NICE JOB IN THERE KIMMY!"

Kim grits her teeth, squeezes her eyes shut once then opens them again, forces her feet to keep moving. Shakes her head.

 _No_.

Because her first instinct is always to fight, to stand her ground, to march right back towards Amanda and tear her apart.

But that's the thing, isn't it: she already _did_ that. Tore Amanda apart. And this shit that's constantly being thrown her way now? Kim fucking _deserves_ it.

So, no. No fighting.

_Deep breath in. Keep walking._

"MAYBE IF YOU KEEP PRACTISING, YOU'LL BE ABLE TO TRANSFIGURE AWAY YOUR SHITTY FUCKING PERSONALITY!" comes Amanda's voice again, stalking her down the corridor.

Kim clenches her fist tighter, fingernails digging into her palm. She's nearly at the end, almost turned the corner, then she can disappear.

Nearly, nearly.

But _Merlin_ does she want to yell back. Tell Amanda that comment was weak, inform her that she's losing her fucking touch, that she knows she can do better.

And forget yell, forget it — she wants to scream back, wants to punctuate some cutting insult with a laugh that's exactly like the cruel, high-pitched sounds that follow her now; filling the corridor, imposing, all the way up to the high ceiling: Amanda's friends, mocking her.

 _Kim's_ friends, once.

She turns the corner and darts through a hidden passageway, using it to gain a few precious extra seconds to get to the bustling Great Hall before Amanda and her entourage.

A short time later Kim's sitting down at the Gryffindor table feeling light-headed, not entirely certain how she got from the Transfiguration classroom to here.

And she kind of just... stares at an empty plate for awhile—not sure how long—when a tentative, careful hand comes to rest on her shoulder.

With no control over her body at all, Kim flinches away like she's been burned, grimacing, sucking air in through her teeth. Ptero is around her torso again, compressing, trying to bring her down. But her every nerve is still exposed.

She thought sitting, breathing, waiting might help. But all at once she realises that she's past the point of being able to slap herself out of it.

And maybe that's Jason's warm voice beside her, or above, or below...

Everything is tilting on an axis, time slowing and speeding up at its own leisure.

Fuck, she needs to get out of here.

As abruptly as she arrived she gets up again, feet carrying her away and not quite processing anything at all.

Because Kim's losing herself now, feeling disjointed, thoughts all over, heart skipping like a warped record. Here— here— here it comes, watch the breakdown—

She exits the hall and soon turns into a familiar, lesser-used passage, crashing down the deserted narrow staircase with her teeth bared like an animal, breathing like she suddenly can't—choked splutters and gasps, silent, suffocating—trying to get as far from people as possible before she loses her mind completely.

Kim's sprinting full-stop now, down further into the dungeons, far enough so there's no risk of running into anyone. She turns off the staircase and her legs are shaking underneath her.

Ptero's trying to talk to her, she thinks, but she can't hear him over her heart pounding in her ears.

And after all of that she doesn't even go into a dungeon proper, because her destination is elsewhere: the furthest away that she can physically get from the main dungeon staircase. A corner at the very back.

As it happens, that particular place is a caretaker's cupboard.

Kim taps the handle of the wood door with her wand, mutters, pushes at it, movements stiff and jerky. It opens earnestly, happy to have someone stop by, so used to loneliness after hundreds of years of neglect. And the state of the place is an easy indication that this isn't her first time here by any means—it's strangely clean everywhere, the floor quite literally a different, lighter colour than out in the corridor, what with all the incessant scouring she's done.

Past caretakers likely gave up on cleaning the majority of the dungeons a long time ago. And as much as she despises Filch she can't blame him—there are hundreds of rooms down here, some as big as concert halls and others not much larger than the one she's in now.

This is _her_ stupid cupboard, damn it to hell, scrubbed clean in many a panic attack comedown while her brain was still in standby mode, sapped of any ability to process, reason, or feel much at all.

For the moment, Kim collapses against the stiff wood shelving—what could be hundreds of little built-in cubbies that serve as both storage and walls, some imperfect and charred in places where they've been blasted as if by small explosions; her knees hit the stone floor hard, wrists bracing, jamming, straining at the impact of all of her weight coming down.

She grabs at the shelf with clawing fingers, curls up against it a little to ride the attack out, squeezes her eyes shut tight despite the tears streaming down her face and the sobs wracking her chest. Ptero is still trying so hard to help, and him squeezing her like he is will take it all away faster, she knows.

He's so good, so fucking _loving_ and she doesn't deserve him.

A _creak_ splits the gasping silence as the door of the cupboard is pushed open—she forgot to lock it—and in the space of a stuttered heartbeat there's another, heavier _thud_ as someone else's knees hit the floor equally as hard as hers did. Ptero moves up to coil around Kim's neck just as arms wrap around her from behind. Strong, warm, saving.

Jason.

She might have known it was him before he even opened the door, but the recognition is mostly at how he smells—the sense memory stored somewhere safe, stable, well away from her reeling conscious mind. And he grips at her with a kind of desperation, throwing a lifebuoy to her as she's drowning, pulling her up to sit, squeezing her tight against his chest that's rising and falling in a quick beat, smelling like cologne and exertion and breathing rapidly into her hair through his nose.

He ran here, followed her all the way down.

"Merlin, Kim," he whispers, rocking her a little, pacifying. Surely not even realising he's doing it.

She brings her hands up to grip at his arms, flexed under the soft fabric of his robes at how tightly he knows he must hold her for him to be of any help at all. Eyes still closed she clutches blindly, fighting the frantic, trapped urge to push him off of her, trusting that a good hold on him will keep her afloat somehow. Impossibly.

It might be seconds, minutes, hours, or days that go by as they huddle together on the cold stone floor, but eventually she starts to feel herself come down. Breathes, and it's something a little rattling but unquestionably whole.

"' _The palm trees fall into the sea,_ '" Jason begins to [sing](https://open.spotify.com/track/0iI8LriXKjg47IxjNCWuwz?si=9FIqzUkHSf6UunB6yxXM4g) softly, like a lullaby. "' _It doesn't matter much to me. As long as you're safe, Kimberly. And I can gaze deep—_ '" he takes a breath, "' _into your starry eyes, baby, looking deep in your eyes, baby..._ '"

She lets the familiar song fill her ears, trying to hum along with him but failing to keep her voice still, interrupted by echoes of sobs, though now only faint remnants of the real thing.

Finally fading away, letting her breathe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'when you break' by bear's den.
> 
> the song jason's singing is called 'kimberly' by patti smith.
> 
> short one this week, so I've posted the next chapter too! happy reading, friends.


	6. Some Day Soon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/5REiwJZQboaDdAnDf8ljhs?si=-O5V9HdtTee9N7NhO80tFg). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Kim does something very uncharacteristic the following morning and skives off History of Magic entirely.

If she had the energy to do much of anything she would probably be pleasantly scandalised at her own rebellion, given they're still in the first _week_ of the school year.

But upon waking up she found herself so exhausted that she could barely lift her head from her pillow. The lethargy isn't something that she's had to deal with in a few months, and its presence at all sparks a small flicker of panic in her chest as she stares up at the canopy of her four-poster.

Because she _knows_ this particular brand of tiredness—it isn't her getting a cold, or a result of her staying up too late—it's a case of Depression Fatigue, very familiar to her now, where truly nothing seems more important than sleeping. Where regardless of how much rest she gets, it's like there is a hole in her energy reserves; all of it leaks out no matter what she does, and as a result she's unable to do much of anything at all. Like the voice of reason in her mind that tells her to _do_ things decides to take a break, goes on vacation for a few hours.

And she lays here now, having woken up again after sleeping for a blissful hour past when she would normally get up, the lesson upstairs already well under way. In the pitch darkness afforded to her by her curtains she blinks, feeling like a failure because she caved, slept in, while the other Depression Side of her mind assures her that it was completely, undoubtedly necessary.

Kim sighs, knowing that she's not in her right mind at the moment.

And it's comforting, at least, knowing that Jason or Billy will be able to give her the lesson notes. That Jason will completely understand, given how last night went. But even if she had nobody to cover for her, she's not sure if she would have been able to make it.

Luckily for her and the rest of the Slytherin fourth-years, they've a free period between History of Magic and lunch on Fridays. So Kim has a few glorious hours with the dorm to herself before she has to make her way to Double Potions.

" _Ptero, are you awake?_ " Kim hisses out softly, rolling onto her side and pulling back the silk curtain of her four-poster. As her eyes adjust to the soft green glow of the room, she peeks over at his enclosure, which sits right next to her bed.

It's a few moments before he comes slithering into view and up the tiny tree in the centre of his enclosure. Once at the top he continues onto the length of smooth nylon rope tied there, spinning around it and making his way over empty space like a tightrope daredevil. Upon arriving at the other end where it's attached to the knob at the top of her four-poster, he leisurely spirals down the post, bright neon pink against the dark, ancient wood.

Once at her eye level he wraps himself around the post securely and sidles forward, stretching toward her until he's positioned his face right in front of hers. " _Good morning_."

Kim tips her head so that it sinks into her pillow further. " _You could've just told me you were awake and I would have helped you over, you goofball._ "

" _No need_ ," he hisses softly, bopping his face into her nose. At the contact, she closes her eyes. Breathing deep, full.

.

Up a whole whack of storeys and across the castle, a tiny, barely audible snore sounds from the small girl on Trini's right. And knowing Chip, it won't be quiet for long—once she gets going, her snores tend to crescendo into something much more substantial.

And she shows no signs of waking up, given she's passed out in a typical fashion on her writing desk with most of her face buried in the elbow of her cloak.

On Chip's other side, Summer looks down at her pointedly before rolling her eyes and tossing her long blonde hair off her shoulder. Twirling her quill in her hand for a moment she considers the sleeping Chip fondly before bringing it down in an arc and mercilessly cramming the feather into her exposed ear.

Chip twitches for a few seconds before shooting backwards with a little yelp, her back hitting her chair with a small _thud_ as she starts to paw at her ear wildly. A few curious people look their direction and she glances around, running a hand through spiky red hair slowly and squinting, seemingly confused as to where she is for a moment.

Her gaze lands on Summer, who blinks back innocently. "Have a good sleep, pumpkin?" she asks sweetly, making a show of running the feather of her quill underneath her own chin.

"Ha, ha, ha," Chip mutters, voice gravelly from sleep. "I hope something at least _mildly_ interesting has happened for you to wake me up—"

Trini smirks. "Unlikely, unless Binns dies again," she says matter-of-factly, which earns her a gleefully amused smile from Summer.

"Then why for?" Chip whines, looking between them miserably.

Summer purses her lips together. "You'd just started snoring," she deadpans, which they all know is explanation enough in of itself. "I still have zero idea how such a small person can produce that loud of a noise, but better we don't let you get going."

Trini hums, looking at Chip and nodding. "We already have to deal with it sounding like a train is running through our dorm every night," she says gravely. "Better to save all of these innocent people from experiencing that as well."

Gia leans forward in her seat then, snaking her arm around Summer with a paper bag of doughnuts in hand and shaking it at Chip. "Sugar, love. You didn't even eat yours yet."

Chip grumbles something incomprehensible before taking the paper bag, opening it and bringing her doughnut out.

Within a few moments of taking the first bite, she's looking happier.

"There you go," Trini says, her hand flying over the parchment page on her desk as she writes. It's her day to take good notes, as one or more of them tend to be overtaken by a very insistent need to take a nap every time they're in this class.

They have a regular spot near the back of the lecture—a good vantage point—and Trini looks around for a moment as Professor Binns continues writing on the blackboard. It's the largest lesson that any of them have, at least by student number, given that all four Houses are in one section and the class is mandatory.

In reality the amount of people who actually _attend_ has a tendency to be much smaller, whittling away every year without fail as the school year goes on. Given this is only the second class so far since they've been back, it's still quite crowded.

All things considered, Professor Binns doesn't seem to notice.

Looking around, Trini sees more of the same: there are people asleep, others clearly doing other schoolwork, and some who are having what looks to be full-blown conversations in low voices. Still others are taking notes like she is, a few no doubt intending to capitalise on all of the gold to be made at the end of the year, when people undoubtedly go looking for good sets of notes for exam review.

It's quite a lucrative business, especially for History of Magic.

As for Trini, her memory tends to work better if she's both listening to the Professor and writing everything down, at least where test recall is concerned. She came to terms with this a couple years ago and has since resigned herself to her fate: she will undoubtedly be here in this seat bright and early twice a week, listening to Binns drone on about subjects that _should_ , in theory at least, be interesting.

To be sure, she would rather be sleeping. But there's nothing to be done.

The lesson finishes up after another quarter hour or so and Chip manages to stay conscious for the remainder. With a yawn, Trini packs her stuff up and makes her way out into the corridor with her roommates, walking in the direction of the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom. Instead of going in, though, they turn and descend a flight of stairs to the ground floor of the castle and make their way out into the sun of the courtyard near the Great Hall, eager to spend their short break outside.

It's a beautiful day and Gia plops down into the grass, squinting up at the three of them in the sunlight and smiling wide.

Trini looks between Summer and Chip then shrugs before sitting down next to Gia and leaning into her a little. "Are you guys ready for Moody?" she asks, as the other two sit down as well.

Summer grunts. "Going to have to be. Sometimes I wonder if Dumbledore's going senile though, honestly."

Trini can't help but understand where she's coming from—they've had a remarkably interesting set of Defense Professors thus far, with only one of them being competent.

Well, Professor Lupin was more than competent, really, but at this point he seems like an outlier.

She understands that they have to be exposed to gnarly subject matter—the class is literally on the subject of the Dark Arts, after all—but she would hope that there'd be some kind of limitations.

Either way, it's bound to be an experience.

.

And Defense most definitely passes slower than usual, given that the entirety of her class seems to be dreading Moody's demonstration of the Unforgivable Curses. As their House has their Defense lesson last out of the four, they'd all heard plenty from other students throughout the week.

He lectures for the first half of class, and when the bell rings everyone leaves for lunch looking rather glum. He's bound to do the demonstrations afterward, and Trini, Summer, Chip, and Gia find themselves not able to eat very much through the whole lunch hour.

They return to the Curse demonstrations, and it's interesting, to be sure. But it's also horrible, and once the double period is finally done Trini leaves feeling sick to her stomach. Even Summer—who tends to be stone-faced as her default setting—looks a bit shaken up.

Walking with the rest of the Hufflepuff fourth-years through the castle for a few minutes, they pass through the Entrance Hall and make their way out into the grounds, merging with the Ravenclaws as they all head down to Hagrid's cabin together for Trini's favourite class, Care of Magical Creatures. Her abuela—her dad's mum—worked for the national park authority all her life, and she instilled her love of nature into all of her kids and grandkids. Growing up, Trini travelled all over Britain with her family, hiking and camping and loving every minute of it. Even on the rainy days.

As a result she's always felt at home with animals, and having never encountered a magical Beast or creature before Hogwarts, she signed up for Care of Magical Creatures in third year without hesitation.

Both Billy and Zack had warned her to bring her dragon hide gloves to the first class, a tip she shared with her roommates, in preparation for whatever odd creatures Hagrid had for them to study. Approaching Hagrid's cabin, she finds herself grateful for the heads-up as the sound of a series of small explosions reaches her ears.

The next hour is spent in what Trini can only describe as peril, and that's with her rose-coloured-favourite-class-glasses on. As they all walk back up to the castle for supper with the distinct smell of singed robes in the air around them, she finds herself exhausted. The first week back is always a long one, but not necessarily in a bad way. Just draining.

She does have something to look forward to, though: Billy came over to her during class and asked if tomorrow worked for their pick-up game. And regardless of how much homework she has—which isn't a lot, yet—Quidditch is always at the top of her priority list.

Trini finds herself smiling as they enter the Great Hall, and as she sits down for supper with her roommates, there's an ease that descends over her.

.

As planned, the next day finds Trini walking into the Quidditch stadium with her broom in hand. Far across the pitch she spots Billy and Zack with two other people she doesn't recognise, all holding broomsticks. Smiling, she hops on her broom and speeds over.

Getting closer, she clocks both of the figures next to Billy.

Her breath catches slightly.

 _Oh_.

Dismounting mid-air and lightly jogging up to them, she breathes out a "Hi, Billy," and moves to stand next to Zack, who holds his hand out to her for a fist bump.

"Hey, Tiny."

Kimberly Hart is addressing her, eyes alight and observing her with an easy camaraderie, just like the first time they met.

Without missing a beat, Trini smirks and responds, "Hey, Bitch."

Billy and Zack look between them, clearly confused.

"Wait, you two know each other? That's great!" Billy says, clapping softly.

Trini waves her hand at him. "Oh yeah, we go way back. She tried to hit me with her broom once, it was really special."

"I thought we agreed that was _your_ fault—"

Interjecting, Billy turns to the sandy-haired boy next to him, "Jason, this is Trini! You've seen each other in passing."

Jason smiles softly at Billy then steps forward, holding out his hand, and Trini shakes it. "We definitely have," he says, giving her a nod. He's wearing a set of well-made and slightly tattered red leather Quidditch gloves, and her eyes linger on them as he steps back out of her personal space and leans casually on his _Nimbus 2000_. "Nice to meet you officially, Trini. Billy told me about how you stuck up for him during finals last year, and Zack won't stop going on about how good of a flier you are. I've heard great things."

Raising one eyebrow at Zack—who pulls finger guns at her in return with a wink—Trini shrugs a little, eyes flicking over to Billy with a warm expression. "Warrington and Montague were saying some really awful shit to him," she says lightly, then pauses. Seeing Billy smiling at her, she throws a little grin back. "The entire school knows where your spot in the library is, Billy, and they can't just go around shoving people's stuff onto the floor, anyway. They got what was coming."

Kimberly visibly perks up at the mention of Warrington and Montague, looking like she's just heard Christmas has come early.

"Waaait wait wait. That was _you_?" she says, eyes widening a little as she looks at Trini. "Those two couldn't make any kind of noise that wasn't in a ridiculous singsong voice for _hours_. I saw Madam Pince laughing so hard behind one of the stacks in the library that she cried. And like, this is hard-arse, doesn't-allow-you-to-breathe-too-loudly-in-the-library, Madam Pince..."

Kimberly trails off and pauses for a moment, looking contemplative. "Merlin. Next time we go to Hogsmeade, your first drink is on me."

Trini smirks, then shrugs again. "I figured if they were going to continue to talk shit, they might as well sound pretty while they did so. Not to mention they couldn't seem to jinx me back which was a bonus." She pauses, trying to gauge if Kimberly was being serious. "But sure, I'll take that free drink."

Jason smiles, stepping up to the wood crate sitting in the grass between the five of them. He takes an old practise Quaffle out and shuts the lid snugly, then mounts his broom and ascends to hover a few feet above their heads. "I reckon we're all going to get along splendidly. This is gonna be fun."

Tossing the Quaffle up and down in one hand, he tilts his head slightly and squints at the four of them on the ground. "What do you lot think, Gryffindor and Ravenclaw versus Hufflepuff and Slytherin, to start?"

Trini and Kimberly look at each other and cocky grins spread across both of their faces.

Flipping her half-braided ponytail behind her, Trini clasps her hands together. "Yeah Red, you're on."

Mounting her broom, she kicks off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'some day soon' by alexi murdoch.
> 
> our five kids have finally met proper! onwards we go!


	7. Nightswimming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/6G0NzOx2jEPFsSmhr9N8Ys?si=O03PAjhPQNipx-Pi18J6Hw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Kim breaks the surface of the Black Lake, drawing air into her lungs. Running a hand over her face, she pinches a thumb and forefinger along the sides of her nose to get the water out. Smiles.

Because she has that familiar feeling of buoyancy bobbing in her chest again; the one she knows has nothing to do with the cool water holding her up.

This is her thing, swimming out here. Cliff jumping. This is her place, tucked away from everything else.

And with her fingers starting to prune a little with how long she's been out, she decides to call it a night. The first swim of the school year is always her favourite, but she should really be getting to bed.

Diving back under the water, she swims toward the tiny pebble beach on the shore where she's left her towel, old portable gramophone, and little waxed canvas rucksack she uses for this particular activity.

Walking along the bottom—hard-packed sand and a flat rock here and there, smoothed by the gentle flow of water over years and years—she comes rising out, water dripping off of her. She cracks her neck and adjusts the black leather wand holster on her left forearm a little. Never without it.

After drying off she ties her towel around herself, pulls her socks and trainers on, then one of her faded Slytherin Quidditch crewnecks. She lets the gramophone play out the last few notes of ['Mayonaise'](https://open.spotify.com/track/0jmKzJmUEKNbC7eU8YfOiA?si=nUbTpSQDQL6yFmjyYHU0Lw) by The Smashing Pumpkins, then packs it up and shuts the briefcase. Looking around to make sure she hasn't forgotten anything, she shoulders her bag. Starts making her way back.

Entering the cover of the trees that surround the lake, her feet take her to the right, east towards the castle. She walks in a rough diagonal line, moving to the south in effort to stay in the trees for as long as possible.

As Kim goes, she takes a deep breath at how _surrounded_ she feels—something encompassing, peaceful. The night is warm, still a tad bit too early in the year for it to require any kind of proper clothes, and the water still lingering in her hair and on her skin pulls the breeze to her. It's comfortable, serene. Like every other time she comes out here.

She steps over a protruding root, the leaves of the ancient trees around her doing a slow waltz in the gentle wind. And it's well past midnight—technically into very early Monday morning now. There's certainly nobody out here, not that she's encountered. Here and there over the years, maybe, but never close enough to see her before she saw them.

Never anyone, never caught.

The worst she would get if she _was_ found out is a slap on the wrist, anyway. And she would be out here the next night regardless; maybe take a different route.

Because doing this—hiking around the lake, cliff jumping, night swimming—has kept her half-sane for nearly two years, since everything here at school started sliding out from underneath her. She could never give it up, and rules be damned, she would find a way to keep going.

Coming to the end of the wood with the lush lawn spreading out before her, Kim lingers a moment, looks around, then casts a Disillusionment Charm over herself. Something she taught herself a long time ago.

It's not like she's an expert so the spell is far from infallible, but it keeps her hidden enough in the darkness as she speeds over the sloping lawn, coming to the path up to the castle front doors and treading just beside it.

Once she's arrived she takes the steps two at a time and grabs the great iron handle of the left door, making to tug it open very, very carefully. Just enough to stick her head into the Entrance Hall to see if the coast is clear.

But it doesn't budge.

Her heart does a disappointed flop in her chest. More of a dramatic faceplant than anything.

_Filch, you useless bastard._

She tries the other door to no avail. Sighs loudly. When she came through an hour ago they were both unlocked — to be sure, they usually are. With the wall and the charms on the entirety of the grounds in addition to the security of the castle itself, locked doors don't quite seem necessary.

Apparently not tonight, though.

 _Ugh_.

Kim turns on the spot and lurches forward, dragging her feet a little like an unhappy toddler. Retracing her steps back the way she came: over the grass and back into the safety of the trees surrounding the lake.

Plan B it is, then.

And this has happened before, of course. She always has a back-up plan, even when she's doing a smidge of rule-breaking.

Kim's irresponsible, yes, but not an idiot. There's a _difference_.

Northwest she goes now, passing where she would usually turn a little to make her way to her cliff.

She comes to the end of the trees again and looks down at herself, checking that her charm is still up, then continues along into open space; back over more lawn.

Striding up a small incline, she comes over the little grassy hill and can make the Quidditch pitch out ahead of her in the night, reaching up to the starry sky. Like an idiot, she gives a jaunty wave as she walks towards it, specifically aiming for the small broom shed that stands between them.

Coming to it, Kim takes a quick look around again and pulls the rusted iron handle on the door with minimal effort—the wood brittle, dehydrated after hundreds of years of sun beating down—and swings it open just enough to slink inside. Reaching up in the pitch darkness, she paws blindly until her fingers brush the metal chain pull switch above her head.

_Click, click._

At once, the whole place is illuminated in a soft light. The bare gas lamp hanging from the centre of the low ceiling sways a little with the disturbance, back and forth like a pendulum, throwing different parts of the cluttered shed into light, then shadow, then back again. She grabs a busted broom handle from its regular place propped up in the corner and wedges it through the door handle and frame, crudely jamming it shut. Preventing anyone from being able to open it on the other side.

Kim drops her bag and towel, pulls off her crewneck, and changes out of her wet swimming costume into a soft t-shirt and a pair of joggers. With a nod, she packs all of it up and leaves her bag on the floor, standing up with her gramophone briefcase in hand.

She walks a couple paces and climbs a little over boxes and shelves packed full of an assortment of supplies: maintenance sets, extra Quidditch kit, practice pinnies, sanders and clamps and clips among them. The air is thick with the smell of dust, wood lacquer, and mown grass—all of it triggering a mostly unconscious kind of familiarity that makes her feel even more at ease.

Wedging herself into the back left corner and draping her body uncomfortably over a tall barrel on the floor, Kim reaches behind it and pulls a dirty tarp back to deposit her gramophone there carefully. With a lurch, she pushes herself backwards and into the open space of the shed, then waves her wand and replaces the tarp, hiding the gramophone further to be safe. She leaves it here in the warmer months; one less thing to carry.

Satisfied, she picks her bag back up off the dusty floor then shuffles a couple paces to the right, to the opposite corner at the very back of the shed. The one closest to the castle.

Here is the familiar pair of sawhorses (who, to be sure, are intricately carved to look like _actual_ horses). They're used to work on brooms that need repairing, and are her favourite two things about this entire shed.

Smiling to herself, she taps each of them once with her wand. Waits, plucking an old moth-eaten pinny from where it hangs over the one on the right.

"Kimberly, sweetheart," the one on the left says in a kind voice, springing to attention just as its twin does. It runs a hoof along the boards beneath it, now much more alive than the inanimate, stiff wood it was a moment ago.

"Hi guys," Kim greets softly.

The one on the right snorts, sounding like he's blowing a raspberry. "Thank you for taking that wretched thing off. It's been bothering my nose, you know how I get with the dust—"

He stops talking abruptly and sneezes. Huffs.

"Bless you, Roderick," Kim mutters, a small smile pulling at the corner of her mouth.

"Poor dear," the one on the left coos, swishing her tail so it brushes his rump affectionately.

"Have you two not been dusted yet?" Kim asks, taking out her wand back out of its holster and pointing it at them, then waving it toward the rest of the shed vaguely. "Filch's such a useless ass. _Tergeo_."

There's a _puff_ like pollen being shaken from a tree, disturbed dust lingering in the air for a moment, visible in the low light as it swirls around the gas lamp overhead, like fog against the dawn before it vanishes, magicked away into nothingness.

Kim grimaces. "Any better?"

"You're a dear, Kimberly," Roderick replies, nodding.

The horse on the left, Rodina, tips her head at Kim kindly. "Nothing from Greg today, I presume? Given you didn't come this way?"

Kim shakes her head. "No, sorry. Filch locked me out."

"No matter, sweetheart," Rodina returns. "Ready?"

Kim nods and Roderick clears his throat. " _Feed me and I live, give me drink and I die_ ," he says, voice clear and quiet.

" _Breathe with me, stay with me, and I will thrive_ ," Rodina continues, in the same tone. " _But do not offer me sleep, for I will not survive_."

Kim waits, and when they don't keep going, she nods slowly. Takes a deep breath in and lets it out; hangs her head to stare at the floor, unseeing.

What is it, some kind of disease?

She racks her brain, running through definitions and analogies, wading through a sea of numbers and letters and shapes.

A fever? Or is that way off?

Kim steps back a little, murmuring, "Hang on, guys. My mind's still a little rusty from summer holiday."

"Take your time," Roderick says, tipping his head.

Kim starts pacing the shed slowly, with only enough space among the clutter for three short strides before she has to turn around again.

To prevent herself from getting dizzy she slows. Breathes.

 _Okay_.

Her mum always says to keep it simple where riddles are concerned: the most basic answer should always be the first guess. In all likelihood, it really wouldn't be some kind of bizarre magical virus. Nothing that specific.

_'Give me drink and I die.'_

Kim furrows her brow. What dies when given water? Given liquid? No plant she knows of. Even a cactus needs water to live—

She stops pacing abruptly and sighs, annoyed with herself. Turns around and walks back over to the sawhorses. "Okay, is it fire?" she asks, a little timid.

If it is, she'll eat her shoe. That was so simple.

"The answer is fire, or a flame. Yes," Rodina replies, throwing her head about a little, satisfied. Roderick whinnies softly.

"I'm a tad bit slow today," Kim mutters, shaking her head. Both of them make hushing noises at her and she smiles.

There's a soft _click_ , and the unremarkable bit of square space of floor between them opens up, a hidden trap door swinging downward and revealing a pitch dark hole beneath.

Rodina tips her head. "It's the first week back, Kimberly dear. You gave us the correct answer."

Roderick nods. "Indeed. It's not a race."

"Thanks guys," Kim says, putting one foot on the rung of the ladder that will take her downward. As she lowers herself in, she waves her wand—swish and flick—at the broken broomstick wedged in the door, muttering, and it comes free, floating back to its corner. With one more wave she extinguishes the gas lamp hanging from the ceiling, throwing the shed back into its previous sleepy darkness.

With a few more steps down the ladder she's beneath the floor, safely clear of the trap door. "Bye, you two!" she calls. "Until next time."

The both of them say their goodbyes and the trap door begins to swing upward slowly. As soon as it does, Kim mutters, " _Lumos_ ," pushing the spell out through her palm and igniting her hand like a torch. In another moment the door has shut completely with a second _click_ , revealing an intricate carving that emits a soft blue glow: two magnificent horses facing each other with the Ravenclaw eagle sitting happily between them.

Kim smiles and begins climbing the ladder down carefully, her palm the only source of light in the dark. On her first time doing this she made the mistake of trying to climb down _without_ a light, which resulted in her nearly slipping and breaking her neck. Clinging to the ladder with her heart thundering in her chest, she called up in a panic to Rodina and Roderick to open the trap door again.

They were very understanding—the ladder began moving on its own by magic at once, carrying her back up to them without her having to move. And after sitting up there for a minute to calm herself, she proceeded to climb down without issue.

As far as passage guardians go, they're really quite lovely.

Kim lets out an easy breath. The air cools the further she descends, the smell of damp earth filling her nose. Her foot soon hits the ground and she hops off, turning around to face the stone tunnel that will take her back to the castle. It's an obsidian kind of darkness but it doesn't make her apprehensive anymore. Not after years of using it.

Humming ['Today'](https://open.spotify.com/track/0u5aO1GYsIhAWCPuXdwnak?si=ADEOatPlQgOBEXMncpTT7w) by The Smashing Pumpkins—one of the songs she was playing earlier at the lake—under her breath, Kim walks along by the light of her hand, the whole thing a sloping incline.

At long last she comes to the wrought iron spiral staircase at the end. Craning her head back with an ever-displeased huff she begins to climb it, up and up and up until she reaches the top and steps onto the landing. It's ten by ten feet or so, with a solid wall staring back at her and a massive bookshelf on the left, both reaching up to a ceiling she can't see, lost in the dark.

" _Nox_."

Kim runs a finger along a few of the book spines as she steps forward and leans up to the wall, lips nearly brushing the cold stone, so close that she hears her voice whisper back at her when she murmurs, "Fire."

She waits in easy silence and the wall doesn't appear to change. Familiar with it by now, after another moment she sticks her index finger out as if to poke at it, satisfied when her hand passes _into_ the wall. Shifting her weight a little, she pops her head through the illusion to check if there's anyone around before she steps through.

"Hi Greg," she whispers, now finding herself standing beside a tall stone statue of a large bald man in a recessed nook of a Hogwarts corridor. The East Wing of the fifth floor, to be exact.

"Good evening Kim," Gregory the Smarmy whispers back, his voice like spun silk. And he's _really_ not that bad at all; not as much as the nickname implies, anyway. "Neither as of yet," he says then, even quieter and meeting her eyes as she walks around to stand slightly in front of him. Answering her usual question before she asks.

She hums and glances about the corridor. If he hasn't seen Filch or Mrs. Norris come through here yet, then she will have to be double careful. Mrs. Norris is a bit trickier, but Filch, for all of his talk, is really quite predictable. He starts at a different part of the castle almost every night—his final patrol before he goes to bed—but tends to go in the same order: top to bottom, then bottom to top again.

"Thank you," Kim breathes, then shrugs out of one of her rucksack straps and swings it around to her front, opening it up and digging through until she finds what she's looking for: a faded, battered paperback novel. She takes a deep breath in and out and taps it with her wand. " _Geminio_."

The book becomes two, and she flips through the copy to check if there are words on the pages—habit now, as the first few times she tried the charm on a book, they all came out blank—then looks up at Gregory and pushes it into his large stone hand. "Got a new one for you. It's called _Pride and Prejudice_."

He peers down at her curiously and takes it, bringing it up to his face and squinting at the title by the light of the torch a little ways down the wall. Smiles crookedly, which means he's pleased. "Are you enjoying it?" he asks.

"Yeah," she whispers, backing up. She can't linger. "Right up your alley too, I reckon."

He continues to smile at her and gives her a nod. "Thank you very much."

She waves lightly and turns to walk away, descending the first set of stairs she comes to and winding her way through the castle carefully—through hidden passageways, along corridors, deeper and deeper down—until she's finally approaching the blank stretch of wall that serves as the entrance to the Slytherin common room.

Kim exhales. Despite the detour, she still feels light. Still buoyed, like she's floating on the surface of the water, staring up at the night sky.

.

The next morning finds Trini out in the greenhouses and wiping at her brow with the crook of her elbow, mindful not to touch her face with her dragon hide gloves, which are currently covered in Bubotober pus for the second time in two weeks.

Across the battered wooden standing table from her, Summer has a _gleeful_ smile on her face as she pops another of the swells, causing strong-smelling pus to come flowing out and into a bottle Zack has at the ready. He stands uncharacteristically still, carefully maneuvering to catch all of it.

The smell is entirely of petrol and Trini finds herself profoundly homesick again, just like last week. It's a reminder of her dad's car repair garage, of days spent sitting on the smooth, cool concrete floor with her nose in a book, the sound of ratchets cranking and air spanners whirring in concert, spinning around some old song playing on the wireless into a familiar medley she associates with home.

Rocky DeSantos, a puppy of a person and roommate of Zack's, elbows her gently and she snaps out of it, pushing the bottle over to catch the pus now draining from the squeeze he's just popped.

"Spaced out there, Crazy Girl?" Zack asks, glancing quickly up at her then returning his focus to the same task.

Determined not to dignify the name with a response, Trini shoots him a glare. She pulled a bit of a fancy corkscrew in their first pick-up match a couple days ago—scoring, to be sure, but also _nearly_ crashing into one of the goal hoop posts in the process.

She didn't expect the nickname to carry over, yet here she stands. Dealing with this shit.

"I love space, man," Rocky mutters absentmindedly, gripping another swell with a furrow in his brow at its refusal to pop.

Seeing this, Trini leans back a little. "That's nice," she deadpans, then raises her gloved hand up between them to protect herself after another forceful, unsuccessful attempt by him to pop it. Getting pus all over her and breaking out in some kind of ghastly reaction is not the way she wants her Monday to go. "But watch the trajectory of that shit, Houston, or we're gonna have a problem."

Rocky nods his head once, a sly, satisfied smirk playing at his mouth. "Roger that. Ground control hears you."

" _Honestly_ ," Summer says drily, glaring at Trini utterly unimpressed and running her fingers over a swell like she's trying to get the last bit out of a tube of toothpaste. "T, you'd be a lot cooler if you weren't such a fucking nerd."

Trini looks up to shoot a retort at her and sees a gentle darkness clouding Zack's face, a promise of a storm approaching in a fierce wind, jaw jumping under skin as he grits his teeth over and over with a side eye in Summer's direction. "And you'd be a better time if you weren't such a bitch," she quips, smiling at Summer sweetly.

And Trini watches Zack curiously, who clearly unwinds at her comment, even shaking his shoulders discreetly to get rid of the tension. Because he hasn't seen the two of them interact much, but this is her and Summer's relationship. Once quite hostile—at Summer's incitation, to be sure, back in their first year at Hogwarts—now turned into a continuous, crackling _roast_ of each other that Trini quite delights at taking part in.

Summer used to be quite mean, as she herself admits. But she's like a personification of some... distant cousin of toxic masculinity, where she tends to be an arsehole to everyone as a litmus test and only respects them if they match her ferocity with equal (or better yet, greater) intensity. If someone gives whatever she throws at them _right_ back to her, she gets a strange satisfaction out of it.

Her and Trini were rough for the first while; burning, scathing, spitting, with Trini being equally as vile in her unwillingness to be tread over, like an animal provoked to strike, until one day Summer's tone began to change, head tipping to the side, eyes brighter, exhibiting something like a tick where the corner of her mouth would twitch. All like she was flirting with stepping over the line that separated a mean comment from a joke.

And Trini, though stunned at first, began inching ever so slowly toward the lighter side of it all too, mirroring Summer. Suddenly, their exchanges constituted of ripping each other apart mercilessly and thoroughly _enjoying_ it.

They've been mates ever since.

But Zack's response of being about to tell Summer off warms Trini's heart, though she would never _say_ so aloud. In their time spent together so far, her and Zack have made a real effort to get to know each other, and though they've only really been hanging out since last spring, she knows that loyalty is ingrained deep into his nature.

"Time, you lot," Professor Sprout calls from where she's standing at the back of the humid greenhouse, all earthy smells mixed with the petrol. "Stopper the bottles and bring them to me, then you're free to go. Next week we're on to the next."

Trini grabs the little crate that contains the bottles from their table, waiting with an impatient teasing glare as Summer pushes a cork into the last. Once they're all safely inside, she starts making her way up to Professor Sprout.

Gia eyes her from her place slightly ahead, picking up pace like an idiot to beat Trini there, glass bottles clinking in her crate obnoxiously.

Trini glares but waits to act until Gia turns her back. When she does, she positively _sprints_ with her crate as quietly as she can muster, mindful of not tripping up and making a fool of herself, and arrives in front of Sprout _just_ before Gia.

She shoots Gia a smug look, who looks thoroughly appalled.

"You sneaky, condescending, _tiny_ rubbish bin—"

Professor Sprout gives Gia a _glare_ and she shuts up immediately, murmuring under her breath and stepping on Trini's foot hard as Sprout counts their bottles and marks the boxes with the names of their respective tables.

Jason Scott comes sauntering up on their right then, placing his own crate down gently and nodding once at Trini.

"Alright Trini? Hope Zack didn't do anything too destructive today."

Trini opens her mouth to respond, only to be hip-checked roughly to the side by Gia. "You're _very_ pretty," she says lowly, eyeing Jason up and down in a manner she usually reserves for appraising freshly baked donuts in the morning. "Proper ride, really."

Jason's whole body has a bit of a flustered fit at that: his eyes blink rapidly, mouth opens, closes, twitches. His fingers pinch at his robes and he rocks on the balls of his feet a little, before seemingly deciding on a course of action and tipping his weight backwards slightly, like he's trying to lean away without being too obvious.

Trini watches this with sympathy and shakes her head before stepping in between them. "No," she scolds, grabbing Gia's gloved hand with her own and tugging her away from him. Gia pouts her lips in a good impression of a smug duck and shrugs, allowing herself to be pulled back to her table and dropped off with Chip.

"Keep this—" Trini grunts, nodding at Gia, "here with you." Chip smirks and gives her a little salute.

Trini walks back to her table and strips off her gloves, waving her wand and spelling them clean before putting them away and shouldering her bag. Zack comes over to walk with her and Summer, and the three of them catch Jason on their way out of the greenhouse.

"Sorry about that," Trini says, grimacing at him and adjusting her mustard yellow rucksack strap on her shoulder.

Jason chuckles. "No worries. You should see Kim when she gets going—she could give your friend a run for her money."

Trini hums. "Somehow, that doesn't surprise me in the slightest," she quips, then jerks her head towards Hagrid's cabin as they make to go their separate ways. "Tell her to turn the charm off for the Skrewts though, won't you?"

The four of them diverge and Jason turns his head to keep eye contact. "I'd be better to tell her to turn it up, actually. She has a listening problem when it comes to me," he calls, voice raised a little to carry across the growing space between them. He waves goodbye and Zack blows Trini a kiss before she turns around and continues walking to the castle with Summer, who's lagged a bit behind to wait for her.

"Gia hit on the poor bloke?" Summer asks, full well knowing the answer.

Trini nods. "Typical day in the life."

.

For the second week in a row, their Transfiguration lesson is spent attempting to change hedgehogs into pincushions. And a handful of them manage to get it this time—Trini included—but Professor McGonagall, seemingly _very_ unsatisfied with their House's progress on the whole, sets them a heavy assignment due for their next lesson.

Groaning internally, Trini makes her way out of the classroom feeling the homework pressure. It's only the second week, for fuck's sake.

She spends their lunch hour shaking her head over and over at Summer and Chip struggling to copy her Arithmancy notes down—wrestling and jostling each other unnecessarily with the page sitting on the table between them, acting in a way that reminds Trini of her twin brothers messing with each other on a particularly long car ride.

They really should be separated, but Trini, Gia, and the other Hufflepuffs in their vicinity are finding it much too entertaining to put a stop to it.

And the both of them are usually more on top of their shit, but in their defense, Professor Vector technically didn't give them any homework last week. What she _did_ do was hint that there might be a pop quiz to brush up on last year's concepts, and Trini made a review sheet in anticipation.

Because Professor Vector is certainly a fair teacher, but her coursework is known for being anything but an easy time. Though Trini's sure Chip and Summer will both do fine—given the pop quiz is just review anyway—them taking it seriously is understandable.

A few minutes before the bell is set to ring Zack catches Trini's eye from the Gryffindor table next door, and she nods before standing and shouldering her bag.

They bid goodbye to Gia and merge with the steady stream of students making their way out of the Great Hall, and Zack comes speeding along from behind them, slowing to walk beside Summer. "T, I thought our eyes meeting across the room was supposed to be _significant_. Then you go and leave me behind."

Trini shrugs. "Gotta keep up, homeboy."

Him and his regular grab-bag of Gryffindors sit in their row, and as predicted, Professor Vector begins the class with a pop quiz.

The rest of the lecture—a double period—passes in a mix of numbers, formulas, and calculations, and they're set a bunch of questions for homework, as is typical.

"I owe you, T," Summer says, bopping into her shoulder a little as they leave the classroom, waving goodbye to Zack as they all make their way down to supper.

Chip nods from her right. "Same. You saved our arses."

Trini hums. "I'll think of something for you two to do for me. Indentured servitude, likely."

This earns her a light chuckle from both of them, and Summer dips her head a little. "As long as I don't have to launder your Quidditch kit, we're in business."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title song is 'nightswimming' by R.E.M.
> 
> posting a bit early this week! as a note, you'll see that I've started underlining music references when they come up in the story--just click and it'll hyperlink you to the track/album on spotify. 
> 
> my lovely friend ella recommended that I include a bit of behind the scenes stuff here and there, so I figured I'd make the songs convenient to find for those of you who are curious. music plays a _huge_ part in both kim and trini's lives (and all of the characters have their own unique tastes) so it's a nice little window into each of their heads.
> 
> last thing on the music, for now: everything's painstakingly accurate in regards to the years the harry potter books take place in canon, which means you'll be seeing stuff from the 90's and earlier mentioned in-universe. as you know, we're at the start of the goblet of fire school year currently, which is canonically september 1994.
> 
> happy reading, everyone. love that people are enjoying this adventure so far, and thanks for joining me on the ride!


	8. Apartment Story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/1lydAZJk7RcohAWufWQhVi). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Two days later finds Kim in the Owlery, watching the school owl that's carrying her letter to her mum become smaller and smaller against the overcast sky. It bears the news that her mum had insisted she keep her in the loop about—mainly how Kim's mental health is faring, how the situation is with Amanda, how lessons are, and the like.

She hums to herself as Billy shifts his weight beside her. "Owls are some of the most calming creatures alive," he says quietly, craning his head back to peer at the hundreds of sleeping birds perched above them.

Kim nods, turning to look at him with soft eyes. Theirs is an odd relationship, borne out of proximity more than anything. Because she's known Jason her entire life—they grew up together in the suburbs of East London, where Jason's parents and little sister still reside. Together with Tommy Oliver, the three of them were inseparable all the way up until Kim and Jason, a school year above, left for Hogwarts.

But as soon as they set foot in the castle—and even in the year before, really—Kim had started to change. Younger and easily influenced, she became too concerned with the new people she hoped to gain favour with and the image she wanted to construct. 

Kim found herself quickly becoming something that Jason never would've been okay with; something different, meaner.

He tried to keep them together, but knowing Kim better than anyone else around, he also got the message quite fast. She treated him like a particularly unwanted nuisance, and they had stood right here in the Owlery one fine October morning, in only their second month at Hogwarts, when she flat-out told him that she didn't want him in her life anymore.

It was cruel and due to no fault of his own, but he respected her wishes. His friendship with Billy had sprung up out of that ruin, from a place of hurt and utter heartbreak that Kim knows she will spend the rest of her life trying to make up for.

And she's told Billy countless times before, but she's certain that she will never truly be able to put her thankfulness for him into adequate words. Because the reality is this: when Kim was nowhere to be found in her former best friend's life, Billy came in and was there.

It's that simple.

Not that Jason wanted for friends—he's an easy to love kind of person. But Billy represents a depth and fraternity that Kim knows Jason yearned for upon arriving at Hogwarts, to a place brand new and exciting but isolating in its novelty. He needed someone genuine who wouldn't just drop him out of the blue, turning their back on him in an act of horrible selfishness.

And once Tommy arrived in their second year, Kim knows that she was there with Jason as much as she could be. Though sorted into Slytherin like Kim, Tommy easily avoided all of the vitriol and managed to find the absolute best, most kind people in their House to befriend. When outside of their common room she was present in Jason's life like a best friend _should_ be, providing everything for him that Kim refused to.

But that first year was entirely Billy—someone for Jason to be around without expectation or pretense. Someone to show him that the world could still be true and kind and _good_ in the face of overwhelming personal evidence to the contrary; a person to quietly help him pick up the fractured pieces of himself and start to build again.

Kim shakes herself a little to come back into the present and takes a deep breath, considering Billy as he stares up at the owls above them. She's still working at figuring him out; he's certainly someone she never would have befriended had it not been for Jason, but her life is so much better having him in it.

"Shall we?" Billy says lightly, feeling her eyes on him and gesturing to the door. Wednesday is the day the two of them spend the entire morning together; they have a shared free period now, just finished Herbology.

"Yeah," Kim replies, walking towards the door and pushing it open. "Library still okay? I'd like to get that write-up done for Sprout before we get saddled with more work this week."

Billy nods and they begin to make their way, Kim still getting faint whiffs of a smell akin to petrol here and there, no doubt left over from their harvesting of Bubotober pus this morning in class. It seems stuck in her nose, but it's not entirely unpleasant. Just noticeably present.

They pass the pearly-white ghost form of the Grey Lady in a corridor and Billy waves at her, getting a small smile in return. "Will your mum be continuing her pattern of weekend visits from last year, Kim?"

Kim shakes her head. "No, we agreed that I'm to write her every week instead. She was all for coming to see me as often as before, but I didn't think it necessary." She pauses, the corner of her mouth quirking up a little. "She's still going to come on Hogsmeade trip days, though. Figure it'll be a nice break from the city."

Billy nods. "That's great. She's a very lovely person, it's clear she cares about you immensely."

"She does," Kim says quietly. "I'm very lucky."

They soon arrive at the library and make their way inside, Billy just ahead of her and singing Stevie Wonder's ['Living for the City'](https://open.spotify.com/track/3qvuhGBr6BSdGPQsdf2gLr) softly, doing a goofy little dance as they enter the boxy wood-panelled hallway that serves as the entrance. Kim chuckles under her breath at his antics, gently tapping along to the beat on the side of her thigh.

This brief thoroughfare always feels more like a nondescript castle passage than an official entrance, only twenty feet or so long and just over half that wide; it requires no more than a mere handful of soft strides to cross, trainers padding along the beautiful, ornate rug that runs the length of it.

Passing the brass book return slot and the ever-colourful bulletin board that covers the majority of the left wall, Kim catches a few club adverts, neatly written schedules for the student-to-student tutoring program the Ravenclaws run, and offers of sale for everything from old textbooks to incomplete sets of _Gobstones_.

With a few more steps, her field of vision at once opens up to reveal the main part of the library.

It's gorgeous in a way that caused Kim's breath to catch the first time she saw it, and she exhales a content sigh as they walk forward into the space, entering the main stacks and beginning to pass row after row of ancient dark wood shelves that tower over them on both sides. It's not too busy, mostly populated with upper-years at this time of morning; at a glance, some have come prepared with a steaming mug for company while others still look half asleep.

And it feels both airy and cozy in here, offering a study environment option for just about anybody: countless large wood tables scattered all over, small nooks in reading rooms filled with squishy armchairs, and personal desks of varying sizes abounds. There's a diverse landscape, sprawling and ever-changing; certainly difficult to navigate, some days. But there is always _somewhere_ , reliably a place for you if you're willing to look, the library as whimsical and alive as the castle it lives in.

As they make their way out of the main stacks and towards an archway closer to the back, Kim yawns wildly and runs a hand through her hair. It seems brighter in here than usual—the late summer sunlight streaming through tall windows, bathing open books in gold and making wet ink shine. On their left, a student stands on his tiptoes and pulls a book from a shelf, causing a gentle swirl of dust to appear in the air, backlit and visible.

There's something like ease coming off of everyone they pass, the tension that builds around exams nowhere to be found amongst the gentle, unhurried scratching of quills; the smell of parchment and old wood managing to keep the whole place imbued with something softer, at least until midterm season arrives.

Turning down another row, Kim ducks to avoid a book at her eye level that's occupied with shelving itself and Billy swerves casually around another, still singing quietly.

They soon arrive at the large table that's become theirs, the feeling much like coming home at the end of a long day. Kim drops her bag on the floor with a huff, collapsing into her regular seat next to Jason's usual chair by the window. Billy takes his place at the head of the table, a bookshelf at his back, and immediately begins arranging his school supplies in his preferred pattern.

She lets out another content sigh, and they fall into comfortable silence for the remainder of their free period.

.

Around an hour later, Kim's reading over her completed Herbology assignment for the second time when Billy's voice sounds softly from her right.

"Lunchtime?"

She nods slowly, rolling up her assignment and beginning to pile her things back into her bag. The bell already rang fifteen minutes ago or so, but they wanted to finish up the last of their work. "You know what I really want?" she mutters, and Billy gives her a questioning look. "Frozen yoghurt. Like, a whole pint of it."

"You're a strange one, K," comes a familiar voice from behind her.

Kim turns around and a giant smile spreads across her face at the sight of Jason and his passenger—Tommy Oliver herself, clinging to his back like a lanky koala. He has his tattered messenger bag slung across his torso and Tommy's dark green rucksack is perched on her shoulders, and to Kim's post-essay brain they're an odd sight, lumbering about like a bipedal turtle on stilts.

"You know me, Tom," Kim returns, getting to her feet and stretching. Billy walks over to stand at her shoulder, and with the unexpected presence of all three of them around her, so much of… everything feels lighter at once.

Jason smiles, hitching Tommy up a bit higher on his back. "Sorry I'm late, guys—" he starts, but Kim and Billy wave him off. "Picked this sack of potatoes up on the way. Figured we'd all go eat together."

"'Picked up' is putting it much more calmly than the reality," Tommy chirps, not making to move from her spot. "I may've run at him screaming from behind and jumped on him. Almost got jinxed, eh Peppy?"

Jason pulls a face. Tommy's called him that—a short-speak of 'Peter Pan'—since the three of them were little kids. "Dangerous times, Tom," he says, voice faux-grave. Tipping to the side a little, he reaches up and ruffles her afro curls, which earns him a whole lot of nips at his fingers.

"Do nOT TOUCH THE FRAWK, MAN!" Tommy groans, ever-protective of her frohawk. She begins messing his golden brown hair up with gusto and covers his eyes with her hands, to which Jason starts spinning around precariously like an idiot, holding his arms out on either side of himself for balance; barking out an uproarious laugh.

There's an aggressive _shush_ sent their way immediately, and Kim bristles.

Annoyed, she turns her head, ready to launch a few choice curse words back in order to adequately communicate the definition of Conversation-Friendly library zones—

Instead of a cheeky student, though, she's met with the sight of the school librarian: Madam Pince. To be sure, she's seemingly appeared out of _nowhere_ a few stacks away, waving her wand at a pile of books floating in the air as if she had been there all along.

_Oh no._

Kim feels three pairs of teasingly _delighted_ eyes on her as she freezes in place, screaming in horror (internally, though not very far down) and wondering where in the eldritch fuck Pince came from. Briefly, she considers the chances of an inter-dimensional portal to the underworld being present in the Hogwarts library before she _feels_ Pince send a bone-chilling glare at HER, specifically.

She's slapped back to her senses and winces, not making eye contact but mouthing "Sorry" before she grabs Jason's elbow and steers him hastily in the direction of the library entrance.

Jason and Tommy both chuckle under their breath and Kim tries to shoot them her most disapproving look as she mutters, "Not a _word_."

Once they're safely out of harm's way Tommy seems to take pity on her, redirecting the focus to resume their previous line of conversation by scoffing down at Jason. "White people," she mutters, twisting around on his back to pout at Kim and Billy accusingly. "Where's my minority solidarity, friends?"

Kim chuckles, her fright ebbing away into happiness at Tommy and Jason's continued goofing around. "Your hair's perfect as always, stop being such a baby."

"It does look great, Tommy," Billy says, swinging his arms at his sides. "Besides, you did a bigger number on _his_ hair. Justice has been served."

Tommy nods proudly. "It'll take you an hour to get it back to its regular floppy goodness, I expect," she mutters, planting a kiss on Jason's cheek.

They soon cross the library threshold and enter the corridor outside, continuing to banter as they make their way down to the Great Hall for lunch.

Arriving to a rapidly-filling hall, Jason looks around and leads them towards the closest end of the Gryffindor table. He sits on the bench sideways and Tommy slides off his back to sit next to him, where she promptly grabs a turkey sandwich, dunks it in gravy, and sinks her teeth into it.

Kim and Billy sit opposite them, piling food onto their own plates and beginning to eat immediately. Predictably, Jason turns part of his attention to his hair, running his fingers through it and not-so-subtly checking his comically warped reflection in a pumpkin juice flagon.

"So what've you kids been up to?" Tommy asks around another bite of sandwich, tipping her head back to pour water into her mouth. "It's great being back and all, and the excitement around the Tournament is cool, but after seeing you all for the majority of the summer I like, miss you and shit."

Jason smiles at her, a depthless fondness swirling in his eyes. "We can make this a standing lunch date, if you'd like."

"I'd love that," Kim says, and Billy nods his agreement as well.

Because this past summer was the first they'd spent together again in _years_. The ease that Jason, Kim, and Tommy fell back into—almost like they'd never been apart—made Kim wonder how she ever got on without them. Having Billy there was an interesting addition, but it felt just as natural with him around, somehow.

"Done," Tommy says easily. "And before I forget — Kimcam, please tell my nephew I love him."

Kim smiles, bringing her hand up to her neck and running a finger along Ptero's spine. After a few seconds of talking back and forth in a barely audible Parseltongue, she replies, "He says he loves you too, and he's happy to see you."

Tommy pulls a ridiculous but entirely genuine sappy face, reaching to grab a treacle tart with one hand while still holding the last bit of her sandwich in the other.

Jason rolls his eyes affectionately, letting his breath out in a little huff. "But nothing new, really, to answer your question," he mutters, taking a pumpkin pasty for himself. "You know we've played a bit of pick-up to try and fill the IHC void — are you _sure_ you don't wanna play with us?"

Tommy shakes her head. "You lot have fun. Maybe once I get used to all these new electives and shit." She sighs dramatically, gesturing sadly with her sandwich. "The bloody schedule is currently kicking my arse."

Jason gives her a soft smile. "Okay. Would love to have you whenever you find a minute."

"Absolutely," Kim agrees, smiling too.

Jason pats Tommy's forearm and shrugs. "Other than that, though, it's been quiet."

They continue to chat as they eat with the hall bustling around them. As is typical, Kim finds her attention divided between talking and people-watching, and her wandering eyes eventually fall on Dumbledore chatting animatedly with Professor Sinistra over pudding up at the staff table.

Kim hums to herself, chewing on the last bit of her pumpkin pasty. "I _am_ curious about how the Tournament is gonna go down though. The teachers're talking it up quite a lot."

The other three nod their agreement. "Bridge and Carlos—those two gangly puppies from my year—" Tommy starts, smiling fondly, "keep going on about how they're entering despite the age restriction. No idea what they plan to do, but it's bound to be free entertainment."

Billy frowns. "There certainly has to be some kind of method to control for that..." he trails off, looking thoughtful. "Admittedly, it would be very interesting to compete. But it seems quite dangerous? Plenty of people have died in the past — I understand the administration wanting it to be more regulated."

Kim's reminded of something then, and she leans in a bit over the table to address the three of them. "On that morbid note," she says, voice very quiet and looking between Jason and Tommy, "I was waiting until we saw you, Tom, to tell you lot: I got a letter from my mum yesterday. She said that my dad contacted her."

Jason's eyebrows shoot up and Tommy's face falls, all of her usual joking manner vanishing.

Kim feels a rush of affection for them both as she continues, "They apparently met up to talk last week, which you know is unheard of. She didn't give me a lot of detail—didn't want to say it over a letter, I'd expect—but er," she pauses, considering how to phrase it. "His... scar, from the war? It's acting up."

Tommy and Jason both seem to understand immediately, but Billy looks confused. "Kim, I'm sorry, but I don't know what that means."

Jason holds a finger up to his lips, then whispers, "You know Kim's dad was on the Dark Lord's side during the war, Billy. He has a tattoo—"

"A Dark Mark. Here," Tommy interjects quietly, pushing back the sleeve of her robes and running two fingers over the underside of her left forearm, feather-light.

Billy looks taken aback. "On his arm?" he asks, apprehension in his eyes.

"Yeah," Kim answers softly. "They were… branded with it, and after everything was over it went from jet black to something like a scar." She pauses, sighing. "Been like that for the last, what, thirteen years? But my mum said it's been getting—" she makes quotes in the air, "more _apparent_."

Kim furrows her brow and takes a calming breath, feeling Ptero stroke the back of her neck with his tail soothingly. At the touch, she relaxes a bit without even trying to. "You guys know my mum, and you know she's not the type to make a fuss over nothing. If she didn't think it important then she wouldn't have told me. But I just... it freaked me out, and I wanted to tell you." She pauses, voice becoming smaller. "I can't talk about it with anyone else."

She runs her fingers through her hair and grips a bit at the roots as all of them just look at each other for a few moments, contemplative.

"Thank you for telling us. Honestly," Tommy says, reaching across the table to take Kim's hand. It's warm, soft. "We're here with you always."

"Thanks," Kim says quietly.

"You know," Jason mutters, looking thoughtful, "Moody said something in our first class last week—that his teaching this year was a 'special favour' to Dumbledore." He pauses. "You don't reckon he might know something...?"

Billy's brow furrows. "Professor Dumbledore is incredibly powerful, it isn't unreasonable to think he might. And it's definitely... curious, given everything that happened at the World Cup, isn't it?" He shakes his head, eyes flitting from side to side as he stares at the table like he's reading something written there. "I know the Ministry is saying it was just a group of intoxicated idiots messing around, but I read up on it a bit. There isn't a lot of information, but you apparently need to be..." he pauses, considering his words. "You can't just be anyone to cast that spell."

They all know what he means without him having to say it—the person who cast the Mark _very_ likely had a proper connection to Voldemort at one point. Whether that connection is in the past remains to be seen.

The bell rings and it startles all of them out of their huddle.

Jason sighs and covers their hands with his own on the table, squeezing once. "Keep us in the loop, K. If you want to talk about it, we're here. But that's definitely unsettling."

Tommy nods, and Kim gives the both of them a soft smile. Billy hums next to her, and she once again finds herself feeling incredibly safe in their presence.

The four of them start to get up, shouldering bags and stretching. "You two have free period now, right?" Tommy asks the boys, who nod in response.

"And I've Ancient Runes," Kim says, voice a light sing-song.

Tommy pulls a face, turning and making to start walking out of the Great Hall. "Your enthusiasm's gross. Try not to drool too much over Professor Babbling, won't you?"

Kim feels her ears go red. "You're such an arse!" she says, throwing Tommy an impassioned flick of the Vs.

"Excellent form," Jason mutters, grinning.

Tommy starts cackling then stops abruptly, eyes going wide as her gaze falls on something over Kim's shoulder. Her cheeks puff out comically and she scurries away, making a beeline for the door.

A second later, Kim turns around to find Professor McGonagall's face a foot from her own.

"Er—" Kim starts, suddenly unable to speak. Her voice seems stuck somewhere in her throat, evidently too frightened to emerge.

Professor McGonagall inclines her head, staring down her spectacles. "I know you and I don't have Transfiguration until tomorrow, Miss Hart," she says curtly, "but I would be happy to get started on teaching you a thing or two now, if you insist on _waving your hand around in that manner_."

Kim gulps. "No, Professor. I'm sorry— it won't happen again."

"Good," Professor McGonagall says simply, walking past her towards the doors.

Once she's out of earshot, Kim exhales heavily. "Holy shit." Jason bursts out laughing, and Billy's smiling, shaking his head. "Guys, I nearly just died!" she whines, pouting like an idiot. "This is no laughing matter!"

Jason comes around the table and pats her on the shoulder. "I know what'll cheer you up."

Kim huffs. "And what is that, Jason Scott?" she asks, shooting him an unimpressed look.

Jason doesn't miss a beat, leaning down to stage-whisper into her ear, "You'll be seeing Babbling in like, five minutes."

She smacks him on the shoulder.

"Ow!"

.

Kim shuffles quickly down the corridor, hitching her rucksack up on her shoulder as she speeds into the classroom, darting through the door just as it's about to close behind Professor Babbling.

She sits down quietly and gets her stuff out as inconspicuously as she can, trying not to look out of breath as she tips her head back a bit in relief.

Once she's got her quill in hand and Babbling starts talking, her gaze drifts to the front row to find Trini sitting alone again, slightly rotated to the right with her leg draped over the armrest of the empty seat beside her as she writes. The position looks ridiculous but somehow comfortable, and Kim understands—she's got one leg folded underneath herself at the moment.

To be sure, the darkness of the room made necessary by the presence of the projector makes this class feel more informal than any other, and while Babbling is by no means a pushover, Kim's certain she would let them all sit upside down if she thought they were paying attention adequately.

As she writes, listens, learns, she gets lost in it—feeling outside of herself in the low light. Here and there she finds herself peering over at Trini, eyes drawn to her out of curiosity, mostly unconsciously.

And the conversation with Tommy, Jason, and Billy is still causing a tiny undercurrent of anxiety to flow through her mind otherwise, not present enough to be uncomfortable, but certainly pulling part of her focus.

She waited to tell them because she wanted Tommy there, the only person she knows who really can understand this particular feeling—of having a parent on the wrong side of everything—given Tommy's late mum was part of the Death Eater ranks along with Kim's father during the war.

To have something like this coming up now certainly just trudges everything up again; all of that pain and hurt, betrayal and heartbreak. But to _not_ tell Tommy, or to tell the boys before her, would feel wrong.

The presence of Death Eaters at the World Cup was something else entirely to see—those masks, those cloaks—and it had brought out something in Kim unexpected.

Not fear, but _anger_.

At fourteen she wanted to run at the group of them, illogical and crazed, screaming and yelling. And it would have been foolish, but something darker emerged in her that night, threatening to burst through the gates of her consciousness; something raging, crackling, unmerciful. Kim wanted to _hurt_ them beyond just stopping, beyond subduing—she wanted to make the group who took her father from her feel the pain she feels.

And she's thought about it before, meeting him again in a situation like that. Vague imaginations blurred at the edges play out in her mind, recurring dreams in the dark. Always the same: him in his Death Eater robes, standing in front of her. Just the two of them staring at each other across open space, frozen.

To this day, Kim doesn't know what she would do if she encountered him proper. Say, if she bumped into him on the street — him tall, dark, handsome in his long black wool coat with the high collar, heavy leather boots taking him somewhere unseen, unnamed.

Because... what _would_ she do? Would she try to fight him? Or would she cry into his arms, tell him how much she fucking misses him?

And she really isn't sure, given that these days, and for years, really, she hasn't been sure if Ted Hart is actually that person—her _dad_ —anymore, or if he ever _was_. Is it possible for her father and the man who was a Death Eater to be separate, somehow?

It's a strange kind of mental gymnastics, to hold two completely different versions of someone in your mind at once. They separate, blur together, separate again; a broken, fleeting double vision, impossible to reconcile.

And would she want to? Reconcile them? Accept that those two people are really just one; that her father is both a Death Eater and the man who raised her, who was there when she was afraid, holding her at night and telling her that he would keep the monsters away?

What happens when the person protecting you from the world becomes _exactly_ what you needed protection from in the first place?

And bits of her memories play through her mind now, all helped along by the sepia tone of classroom, the soft light casting shadows that could be hiding him _just_ at the edge of her vision, hiding him on those days he would play around with her in the house, popping out from behind a curtain, laughing and sweeping her up—smaller then, thinner—into his arms.

Clicks of the projector could be a record player starting, stopping, framing them dancing in the kitchen with Kim's mum to some old song. Their family together forever: one, two, three. Bright smiles flashing, growing, brilliant and warming like the sun.

Kim writes lecture notes as it all plays out, half of her mind occupied by the present and half stuck in the past, Professor Babbling's voice laid over the memories like double exposure on an old photograph.

And with her hand cramping as usual, the lamps start to go up slowly, gradually, increasing in brightness until that stark contrast is swept away, the shadows slinking back, running from the harsh light. All of it no longer an outline, a potential for her mind to fill with images that she incessantly, constantly reaches for.

_But you can never go home again, can you?_

Kim takes a deep breath in and lets it out slowly, beginning to pack her things up. And Trini's there at the front taking her time, sliding back to sit in a semi-regular position that would be considered comfortable by most humans, tracing fingers over the side of her palm, over the dark ink smudged there.

And Kim raises her own hand, feeling like she's still not entirely here; still stuck in her own mind somewhere. Sees the ink there too, just the same as Trini.

She shakes herself a little and packs up faster, considering approaching Trini again. But she's at the front, and Kim would _have_ to walk by Amanda's friends to get to her, there's no way around it. Going up to the front, sitting at the front—she could just as well paint a sign on her back that says, 'Hit Me'.

And Kim should really leave the classroom now.

But she's watching Trini while the rest of the class packs up in what could be slow motion, all of it happening at the borders of her consciousness, on her peripherals, when Trini runs a hand through her hair absentmindedly. And Kim's stomach seems to trip over something, stumbling a little, doing an attempt at a somersault before righting itself.

_Hell, she's beautiful._

Kim sighs and shakes her head lightly. Not today, not today. She's too out of it; her mind feels like the dregs left over at the bottom of a teacup.

Couldn't talk to Trini properly right now, no.

So Kim gets up. Turns, leaves, walking out into the airy, bright corridor. Leaving her ruminations—and every one of her almosts—behind for the moment.

.

"Look at her fly!" Jason shouts, imitating a Quidditch announcer as Kimberly streaks down the pitch with the Quaffle tucked under her arm, having grabbed it once Billy scored on the opposite end.

Flying just behind the play, Trini waves at Zack like she's guiding an airplane onto a tarmac and makes a few motions before pointing to herself, then to Kimberly's right side. Bless him, he somehow seems to get it, and gives her a thumbs up while a cheeky grin spreads across his face.

Within a few seconds he comes to glide in on Kimberly's left shoulder languidly before starting to jostle her a bit, miming at reaching for the Quaffle with gusto, and Trini can hear her laugh as she tries to strong-arm him.

That's when Trini swoops in, giving the Quaffle a hard punch to knock it out of Kimberly's firm grasp. Zack pulls around Kimberly to block her just long enough for Trini to go into a quick swerve downward and grab the ball, where she makes a sharp turn to go streaking back the other way.

"HAH!" Trini shouts, turning her head to see Billy's eyes widen before he pulls around too. As soon as she levels out he comes in to fly right at her shoulder, flashing a toothy smile.

And she senses Kimberly right above, glancing up to see her grinning down at her from ten feet up, seemingly _delighted_ at having the ball stolen from her in such a manner.

"How's the weather up there?" Trini calls, grinning right back.

She hears Kimberly chuckle in response just before Trini's ancient _Cleansweep Six_ starts to do the thing where it brakes on its own a little. Used to it by now, she uses it to her advantage, coming into the scoring area and winding up as if aiming for one of the hoops and forcing Kimberly to change tack a bit to match her speed.

Anticipating a scoring attempt, Kimberly comes streaking downward like a shot, looking to block the ball, but Trini pulls a fake and tosses it to Billy instead.

"AGH!" Kimberly yells, laughing, missing the Quaffle with her foot by an _inch_.

And internally, Trini is impressed. That dive was on a hairpin, and to be able to go from flying normally to shooting down at such a sharp angle takes a whole ton of skill. A certain kind of recklessness, too, which she finds incredibly... admirable.

Trini certainly _knew_ Kimberly was good—she's watched her play for years. But they've only ever played in an official match against each other once, and being on the pitch with her is a whole other thing entirely. Trini's having to seriously focus on playing it cool, even in an unofficial scrimmage where they're all just messing around.

Because Kimberly is a force of nature when she plays, and it still makes Trini kind of perplexed every time she does something to drive that point home. Pulling off a move that _should_ be difficult but somehow making it seem effortless is a great example.

_Head in the game, Gomez._

Trini tunes back in as Billy catches her pass and shoots, with Jason coming in just a bit too late to slap the ball away before it sails through the left goal hoop.

"SCORE!" Zack shouts, flying around to hover beside Trini and whooping as Kimberly redirects her broom to streak after the falling Quaffle, catching it and bringing it back up to them. And when she comes level with everyone, it's with messy hair and bright eyes; there's an ease to her posture that radiates a carefree kind of happiness.

And Trini has a memory that flits to the front of her mind then, of Kimberly telling her the day they met about how she finds Quidditch freeing. How she doesn't think she'll ever get enough of it.

Looking at her now, Trini can see just how genuine she was being in that moment. Not that it's a surprise, but to be that candid and open with a stranger about something you love so much is a certain kind of bravery. And it's undeniable, the truth of what Kimberly said then; it's written all over her right now, coming off her in waves that float around, like words being read aloud to the wind.

Trini suddenly has an acute awareness flash through her, telling her that she's... flying? And she's about to 'No shit, Sherlock' herself when a sensation starts up at the crown of her head and begins to flutter down her back, causing her breath to hitch.

Because, yes, to be clear, she's very much aware that she's currently playing a sport on a broomstick— _literally_ flying—and there's most definitely a certain kind of rush that she gets every single time she starts sailing through the air. But that's not the same as what's happening to her right now.

Here in this moment, she really... _feels_ like she's flying. It's reminiscent of the very first time she got on a broomstick: like a ballooning elation has inflated in her chest, lifting her up as that gentle electric sensation continues to spread all the way to her fingertips and toes, up and down her spine. The entire experience catches her off guard so much that she has to shake herself a little.

_Serious question, is this what an aneurysm feels like?_

"Nifty little play you two pulled there," Kimberly calls then, out of breath and giving Trini and Zack a measured grin. She tosses the Quaffle in one hand lazily, and Trini finds herself still not entirely tuned in, her gaze lingering there, watching her wrist move.

She shakes herself again. God, these people are going to think she's a space case.

They don't seem to have noticed, though, and Zack winks in response to Kim's comment. "I just do what she tells me," he says, jerking his head toward Trini. "Crazy Girl and her crazy plays."

Trini grunts. "How long're you planning on going with that nickname, exactly?"

"Indefinitely," Zack chirps.

"Lovely."

Jason pipes up from where he's hovering next to Billy, "Anyone fancy calling it a night? I reckon we're gonna lose light soon." He gestures to the candyfloss sky, all pinks and blues floating above the Scottish mountains, teasing them with a promise of a summer night's sweetness.

Kimberly nods and stops tossing the Quaffle in the air; her carefree, somehow untouchable persona melting a little as she sends a warm, genuine smile at Jason. "Old man getting tired, I see," she says, then scrunches her nose at him when he scoffs. "Kidding. I'm ready for bed. Are you guys all okay with stopping, though?"

Zack nods along with Trini, and Billy smiles at all of them as he says, "Given we've all expressed interest in playing like this twice a week from now on, stopping earlier here and there should be just fine. On Tuesday night maybe we'll play right up until it gets dark."

Trini smiles at Billy before looking around at the other three. They've all had so much fun thus far that playing twice a week seemed an easy decision.

With consensus the five of them start to make their way down to the ground, and Trini lets out a big yawn. Tomorrow is Friday and she has a bunch of homework to get through on the weekend, but these pick-up games have been great. She hopes there will be many more to come, and it seems that the rest of the group feels the same way.

Kimberly yawns wildly a heartbeat after Trini starts, half-covering her mouth with her hand. And it's soon apparent that Trini's started a trend—Zack, Billy, and Jason all follow suit not a moment later.

The five of them look at each other with little bits of pleasant surprise flickering on their faces, mostly at the notion that none of them really realised how tired they were until this moment.

Trini smiles. Time flies, and all that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'apartment story' by the national.
> 
> those who don't know what 'flick of the vs' [means](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/V_sign#As_an_insult), it's more or less the UK equivalent of what the middle finger is in america (and elsewhere). also called a two finger salute and a host of other names. so our lord and saviour mcgonagall seeing kim do that is a Hard No.
> 
> SO! quite the hefty kim chapter, I know. my bad on the exposition at the beginning but I had to start giving you the first few pieces of THAT whole mess. kim/tommy/jason don't talk about it much (yet) because it's Very Painful, so this is how it had to be for now. no, I do not take criticism.
> 
> (got a bit of trini's gay brain shorting out at the end there, though! just constantly spacing out in a Gay Way as kim flies by! good kid, eh? you will see more of her next week, promise. more trimberly interactions coming up too. gotta get everything sET UP FIRST, YOU KNOW? this is the golf ball slowly revolving around the hole in space jam before you're PULLED IN BY A CARTOON LASSO!)
> 
> but yes! now you've met tommy! for those of you looking for a bit of a better idea in regards to what she looks like:  
> \- she's tall, for one. a few inches taller than kim, closer to jason's height.  
> \- build-wise she's like zendaya as MJ or rue in euphoria. lanky and swaying awkwardly but wholesome as heck. recent growth spurt and more coming, so that will stabilise later.  
> \- her hair is tight curls (see picture linked below), big, and full of secrets, as described. likes to wear it in a frohawk sometimes.  
> \- dark brown eyes.  
> \- ethnicity is mixed: half black half inuit canadian. closest I can think of look-wise is probably... [this?](https://assets.popbuzz.com/2016/16/amandla-stenberg-1461323534-list-handheld-0.png) amandla stenberg-ish, with both darker and slightly more angular features. hair is very similar.
> 
> ^ you will find all of this out and MORE about tommy as the story progresses, of course, but i figured i'd put the looks and such in now so you can picture her if you so please.
> 
> as always, thank you so much for reading. we still have some TIME to go yet, so here is your friendly reminder that this is a slow burn in the trash fire, my dudes. hope you're enjoying it, and comments are always super welcome and appreciated.


	9. Morning Glory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/5AMgAzHqrO8cUGoYGr1CHb). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Kim emerges onto the fifth floor and peers around, a familiar tickle of pleasant, yet slightly apprehensive rules-breaking anticipation scratching at her scalp. And she knows the risk of being caught is much less at this hour—it's half-past four in the morning, well after Filch's bedtime. But due to the continuous unpermitted outings, her behaviour in this particular part of the castle is almost instinct at this point, and with a careful first step into the corridor she sets off at a lurch, scurrying along.

She approaches Gregory the Smarmy at a quick pace, shoes barely kissing the floor with how quietly she's moving. He looks up though, ever aware despite being asleep just a moment ago, and nods once as she approaches.

"Hey Greg."

"Kim. An early outing today, I see."

She nods. "Got to get time in while the weather lasts."

Gregory sighs, amused, looking down at her with raised eyebrows and lips pursed. "Though you will still be out there regardless, I know, like some kind of ice sprite. Flouncing about without a care of the chill."

Kim smiles and shrugs. "Can't be helped."

He inclines his head. "I expect you would like one of your back-up passwords, and I do believe I have the perfect one, if you could just hang on for a brief moment—" he twists around on his stone base and sticks his arm straight through the wall behind him, reaching. Pulls out a book a moment later. Clearing his throat, he brings his glasses—which are made of stone with no glass in them at all, the movement so purely out of the force of some living, breathing habit—up from their chain around his neck to perch on his nose. Blinking like he's concentrating (though his large fingers are practised at this by now), he flips it open to a dog-eared page.

"I say, I squealed so loudly when I read this yesterday that I scared the wits out of a pair of students. It is _divine,_ ah, where is it now..." he pauses, running a stubby index finger along the page. Hums after a moment. "Here it is: 'I had not known you a month before I felt you were the last man in the world whom I could ever be prevailed on to marry.'"

Kim looks up at him seriously and nods. "Classic line. Bloke got absolutely _obliterated,_ didn't he?"

Gregory makes a pleased twittering noise, a gleeful twinkle in his eye. "He so much deserved it, the pompous bastard."

"You said you read that bit yesterday, so are you about halfway then? Enjoying it?" she asks, smiling. Genuinely curious to know his opinion. And years ago, she wouldn't have thought that a man with 'smarmy' in his nickname would have a certain fondness for novels with epic love stories in them—or novels in general—yet here she stands, discussing _Pride and Prejudice_ with him like they're part of a Hogwarts book club.

And they kind of _are,_ really, by their own doing: the shelf at the entrance to the passage he guards holds all of the books he's read. It appeared there the first time Kim gave him one, and they've had this little arrangement ever since; whatever she's reading, he reads too.

He told her once that he likes books because they take him out of himself; out of this corridor, this castle, this country. Kim knows the feeling well—he's the same as her (and most other readers) in that respect—so she finds it enjoyable, giving him new stories. They get to discuss them like this, and his input is always interesting.

"Halfway or so, yes," he confirms, nodding again. "So do not spoil me, young devil!"

"Greg, it was published nearly two hundred years ago," she deadpans, a teasing grin twitching at the corner of her mouth. "I _really_ think you're outside of the acceptable time limit to ask me that."

They both know that she would never spoil the story, of course. He's just being dramatic as always, which she very much appreciates.

Gregory huffs. "Oh, away with you," he mutters, giving her a shooing, jaunty wave. Mirth in his stone eyes, somehow. At this point, she's stopped asking herself how that could be.

And Kim smirks because she can't help it, clutching at her chest and feigning offense. "Ouch," she drawls. "Before I'm _rudely_ dismissed, can we shorten the password though? I know it's a back-up, but just in case! I don't want to forget it and I don't have my copy of the book on me."

It's likely unnecessary—in her experience the castle front doors tend to be unlocked by around six o'clock in the morning most days (if they're locked at all in the first place), so she's not expecting to have to come this way again. She'll only use his password if she returns through the broom shed passage, where giving it to Rodina and Roderick will allow her access to the trap door without having to solve a riddle.

It's a security measure in place so that people who come _out_ through the castle are vetted by Gregory the Smarmy and can get back _in_ as a result, but if anyone else wants to come through and into Hogwarts without being subject to his judgement first, they need to pass a different kind of test.

(She has a feeling, though, that if someone who wasn't a student somehow managed to get in, Gregory would grab them by the throat as soon as they came through the wall.)

So no, she likely won't need the back-up password. Never can be too careful, though.

He peers down at her, pretending to consider giving her another or not. "We must use that one some other time," he says, acquiescing. "For now, the password will be 'Ice Sprite.'"

"Thank youuuu," Kim sing-songs, voice soft. "Enjoy the rest of the book. I'll likely not see you later, so I bid you good morning." She gives him a wink and looks up at him, waiting, before he reaches out and discreetly drums his fingers along the wall. At that, she steps forward into the alcove he's situated in, knowing the wall to be an illusion now, and comes through it onto the landing with the spiral staircase just beyond.

Raising her hand in the pitch dark, she mutters, " _Lumos,_ " to ignite her palm like a torch. Continuing her pace from earlier she sets off, speeding along down the stairs and through the stone tunnel, always quicker with the decline.

Kim hums to herself as she goes, feet padding along packed earth. And perhaps it's the comfort of knowing that she's on her way to one of her favourite places, but this tunnel has never felt _ominous_ to her, per se. The rich, damp darkness was apprehension-inducing at first, sure, but as a physical space it exudes a neutral kind of feeling, simply a means to an elsewhere; the movement of it all better for her, healthier, less stagnant. Certainly different than being alone with her thoughts while stuck in one place, leg bouncing and worrying at her lip.

It's much closer to peace, the in-between. Here, she's better than usual at willing her mind not to fill the unfocused silence.

The iron ladder that leads up to the school broom shed soon catches her spelled light and Kim sighs contentedly, habit taking over as she tightens the straps of her rucksack so they're snug. Up, up, up she climbs, pushing her lit hand into the kangaroo pocket of her faded black hoodie once she's just beneath the trap door. As her eyes adjust, the familiar carving of two horses with the Ravenclaw eagle sitting between them becomes visible above, glowing faint blue against the ancient wood.

Winding her arm around the smooth cool metal of the ladder like a vine, Kim draws her wand from her forearm holster and reaches up to tap the two horses. The entire thing glows brighter before there's a _click_ and the trap door starts to swing downward slowly; practised at this by now, she steps down a rung without thinking about it, allowing it to pass over her head and open fully.

Once she's safely standing on the floor of the broom shed above, the trap door begins to shut of its own accord. With the corresponding _click_ , Kim putters over to her hiding spot—taking a grand total of two small steps to cross the cramped space—to yank the old, soft tarp up and off of a few tall barrels in the corner. She exhales sharply through her nose to avoid inhaling a lungful of dust and grabs her gramophone case from its spot, swinging back out to stand proper again.

Nodding once, Kim extinguishes the light in her palm, casts a Disillusionment Charm on herself, and walks out of the tiny shed, into the misty Sunday morning.

.

Trini climbs the spiral stone staircase at a sleepy pace, rubbing at her eye with one hand and holding the handle of her portable gramophone with the other. Coming to the door at the top, she grabs at the iron ring that serves as its handle, tipping forward to shoulder it open and walking out onto the parapets of the Astronomy Tower.

It's a cool morning, the air thinner up here despite the gentle, shallow fog that blankets the grounds below. She takes a deep breath, closing her eyes briefly before walking forward and gently depositing her gramophone on the stone floor. Going into a kneel, she fumbles at the old, stiff latches of the small briefcase and props it open, taking a record out of the built-in sleeve—Nas' [_Illmatic_](https://open.spotify.com/album/3kEtdS2pH6hKcMU9Wioob1)—and setting it up. With a few turns of the crank handle the first song begins to play quietly through the chilly September air, just loud enough for her to hear it.

From up here, the view is breathtaking: she's almost directly above the castle front doors, looking out over the grounds towards the front gates and further. The village of Hogsmeade pulls her gaze, there just beyond the wall to the north and nestled up against mountains that stretch and spread for miles. It's one of those places that even a wizarding postcard can't do justice; more than picturesque with its tiny thatched cottages clumped together, set against the lush green surrounding environment. The only entirely wizarding village in all of Britain, living and breathing for nearly a millennium; as ancient as Hogwarts, like a sibling next door. And sleepy, still, though waking—a handful of chimneys exhale thin tapering spires of smoke into the sky, evidence of the warm, crackling fires lit by residents preparing for the day.

Closer, a couple of owls come swooping towards the castle from the Forbidden Forest on her right, gliding lazily on the breeze.

Late summer in the Scottish Highlands. It's still, beautiful.

Trini takes a deep breath in and out again, rolling her neck gently to stretch as she makes to take a couple steps back from the edge of the parapets—

Oh, _look_ who it is.

She peers down, squinting at the familiar sight of someone under some kind of concealment charm walking the grounds below her. Over the years they've clearly gotten more proficient at it, but in the stillness of the early hour, and aided by the blueish twilight of the dawning morning, Trini can usually spot them. They're not _entirely_ invisible after all—more like a chameleon taking on the appearance of the space around them; a person covered in tiny mirrors like stars, an imitation galaxy.

And the two of them don't always coincide in the days or hours they choose to do their respective activities, whatever the mystery person's may be. Trini doesn't see them every morning she's out here by any means, but she's familiar enough with the peculiarity of the sight to notice, now.

Curiosity has nearly bested her a few times, fueling an urge to sprint down through the castle as soon as she sees them coming closer. Because if she were to run fast enough, she might be able to catch them as they slip into the Entrance Hall, right?

But no — not knowing what she would say or do with their identity is the reason she doesn't. Because… what _would_ she say, anyway? ' _Hi, I watch you without your knowledge from the top of the Astronomy Tower sometimes and I really wanted to meet you proper! My name is Trini, what's yours?_ '

Definitely not. The identity of this Morning Glory, whoever they are, will unfortunately have to remain a mystery.

This is the reality Trini has arrived on, even despite that curiosity becoming more and more insistent, prodding her in the side of the head with more force every time she manages to spot them. What else can her intrigue do but grow after years and years?

She lets out a disappointed sigh, watching the person enter the castle then stepping back as she meant to before, getting into position, pulling her beanie further down around her ears and beginning the blended tai chi and yoga routine that's become muscle memory to her. Every single morning she's up here—rain, snow, or shine. There's nothing in her life that quiets her ruminations quite like this.

Beginning to move through the positions, Trini works at emptying her mind and controlling her breathing in the way that her dad taught her years ago. Her brain likes to spin at a mile a minute, so the process has always presented a challenge, even after all this time.

And more so recently, even? Because something about this year feels different—she isn't sure what it is yet. It's holding on to her like bits of a spider web, lightly and just barely there. Every time she thinks she's swiped the last of it away, another bit of it makes itself aware to her senses. Clinging, invisible.

A few more deep breaths and she's rid of it for the moment, focusing on her heartbeat and the music drifting around her. Hip-hop seems an odd choice for a yoga soundtrack, but the heavy beats and rhythm have always worked to help quiet her thoughts. This particular record is insistent and artful in how it fills up her consciousness.

Genius, really. She loves Nas.

.

Trini gets lost in moving, in breathing, and before she knows it she's done. She uses the record as a timekeeper—once the forty minutes or so of it have played out, the sun is already on its way up to take its place in the sky.

Nearly seven o'clock in the morning, now. The castle just starting to wake up underneath her.

With one more deep breath Trini finishes stretching, packs her gramophone up, and makes her way back inside. Through the castle she goes, descending the marble staircase into the Entrance Hall with an energetic bounce in her step and turning left immediately to push open the door that leads down to the basement.

The air gets warmer as she makes her way down the stone flight of stairs, passing some sleepy, early-riser Hufflepuffs on their way up to breakfast. She hops the last two stairs and turns right, entering the corridor that leads to her common room, greeted at once by the happy warm glow of the torches on the walls and the unmistakable smell of fresh rolls and cinnamon buns wafting from the kitchens.

Stifling a yawn behind her hand, Trini comes to her destination: a seemingly ordinary stack of barrels. She taps out the password with her wand and the passage opens up—within thirty seconds she's standing in her common room, sunlight already peeking through the small basement windows that provide a shallow glimpse out into the grounds.

The circular room is a picture of comfort: the plants hanging in polished copper pots all over seem to reach out towards the windows, and the light wood and crackling fireplace always gives it a cozy feeling, regardless of the weather outside.

A cactus waves at her as she passes it on her way to the girls dormitories, and she waves back with a small smile.

.

Trini eats a light lunch on Tuesday, arses around in her dormitory for a little while, then makes her way up to the Entrance Hall with her broom in one hand and her Quidditch kit duffel in the other.

When she steps out of the staircase to the basement she immediately sees Zack across the hall, leaning up against the wall next to the castle front doors and dressed similarly to her—a fitted tank top, running shorts, trainers, and his regular tattered black rucksack slung over one shoulder.

She weaves through the last few stragglers in the hall—the afternoon bell sounded five minutes ago—and the two of them walk out into the sunshine together.

"This is wicked, eh?" Zack says, cruising down the front steps beside her and squinting a little in the light.

Trini nods, feeling something like relief at being outside during class hours. "Yeah. Whoever decided that our Houses'd share a double free period is touched in the head. Honest."

"Not complaining though," Zack chirps, stretching his arms out above his head lavishly and letting out a satisfied hum.

They make their way across the grounds, stopping at the small shed that contains the school brooms (where Zack picks his favourite) before arriving at the Quidditch pitch. Walking over the lush, manicured grass, they drop their bags and brooms at the entrance to the east change room tunnel, Trini kneeling down to take her beat-up portable gramophone out of her duffel. She looks around for a moment, considering where to put it, then walks out to the very middle of the pitch. Setting it down carefully, she opens it and begins to play a David Bowie album: [_Let's Dance_](https://open.spotify.com/album/37KYBt1Lzn4eJ4KoCFZcnR).

Hopefully, Zack will like it. She's not entirely sure about his taste in music—she's asked him before only to be met with a vague answer, and when she asked him earlier today after History of Magic he just shrugged and told her to surprise him.

By _her_ metric, at least, this should make for good running music.

It starts to play and she takes her wand out of its holster, waving it to increase the volume as she walks backwards. By the time she gets back to Zack it's not at ear-shattering levels, but loud enough that they'll be able to hear it clearly.

"Shall we?" Zack says, jerking his head towards the pitch proper.

Trini nods, double-tying her shoelaces before they set out at a light jog with ['Modern Love'](https://open.spotify.com/track/7LyIoUsiMtelB1I0I4drEF) booming through the stadium.

She smiles, craning her neck side to side and trying to loosen up a little.

"So what do you think about them? Our little pick-up crew?" Zack asks a few minutes later, voice joining the beat of their quickening breaths and the _swish_ of their shoes sweeping across the grass.

"I like them so far," she answers, considering. "Kimberly is... hard to get a handle on? but I _think_ I'm getting there. And Jason is full Wonderboy but more approachable than I would've guessed. Billy I've always been a fan of." She pauses, eyes roaming the empty stands. "Really are a strange trio though, aren't they?"

Zack nods. "They are. Jay and Kim have history, but I know it's complicated as all hell. You know him and I aren't that close, so I don't got the full gist."

Trini's jaw clenches lightly. "I can see that—the two of them. They're both too pretty _not_ to date."

"No, not history like that," Zack clarifies, as they come to the end and begin to curve around, running the edges of the pitch like a track. "They've never dated, I'm certain."

"Huh," Trini mutters. "Matter of time, then."

Zack makes a disagreeing noise. "Nah T, really. They quite literally grew up together—parents sent them to muggle school same year and everything. Jason's more protective of her than anything. Like, I made a comment about Kim, innit—"

Making an assumption, Trini reaches up and smacks him on the back of the head. Nicely.

"Mate!" he groans, chuckling, slinking away and putting a few feet between them for safety as they continue to jog. "It wasn't disrespectful! I just said like, 'Your girlfriend is quite the character' or something when we were in the common room this past weekend."

Trini grunts. "Okay, okay. My bad."

"It's cool, I'll get you back another time," he says, grinning. After another moment of determining whether or not she's going to hit him again, he comes back to run beside her.

"Anywho, Jason clarified that they weren't dating. But he said if _I_ was interested in her, he'd throw me from Gryffindor Tower if I ever hurt her, then come down and sink me and 'all ten of my abs' into the lake—" Trini raises her eyebrow at him and he shrugs. "His words, not mine."

"Points for imagery," Trini mutters, reaching up and adjusting her ponytail a little.

Zack hums. "So no, they aren't a thing. And I can't say exactly why, but I get the best friend vibe? Though I reckon they're _mad_ difficult to gauge. Either that or I'm losing my touch."

Trini considers this, and they run for a bit before she speaks again. "Okay, I have a question, and I don't mean it to be offensive so please tell me if I'm being an arse," she starts, craning her head around a bit to look at him. "I get that you and Jason are more like, roommates-in-passing kind of deal, but if you haven't got a clear picture of his and Kimberly's relationship by now, isn't that a bit of a red flag?"

He looks back at her curiously and she runs a flat palm over the top of her head, smoothing out her hair, considering what exactly she's getting at. And she's always valued this about her relationship with Zack—she can say what's on her mind and not feel like she has to hold it back. He helps her think through things and she almost never feels self-conscious.

Very few people in her life are like that, and having him around is really, really nice.

They'd started doing these runs together last spring, not long after they met. And the endorphin rush of jogging plus being beside each other for the entirety of the workout makes for a great setting to chat about all kinds of topics.

"I just mean... you've known them for three years, even if it's been more surface-level," she says slowly. "But if you've gleaned nothing from them in regards to their relationship that _entire_ time, doesn't that strike you as a bit odd?"

Zack makes an unsure hum and Trini hesitates, trying to formulate her thoughts. "I'm saying this knowing you aren't thick," she continues, smirking, "despite how you act ninety-nine percent of the time. So I'm sure it's not an inability to read them on your end. And I myself am _apparently_ very hard to get to know as a person—I tend to be reserved, right, but even I'll open up eventually."

Trini pauses again. "If they're _that_ closed off though, should we—should I—keep them at arms length?" she says, a bit timidly now. Not entirely sure why this is irking her so much. Her voice gets smaller and smaller as she continues to speak, "I really don't get a bad vibe from either of them—not at all, actually—but now I'm wondering if I'm just panning for fool's gold, I guess?"

She sighs, hesitates. "Man, I don't know..."

But Zack looks back at her like he understands. "No mate, I get what you're saying, and I'd probably agree with you if that was actually the case. It's impossible to trust a person if they never open up — why pursue a friendship if you know right out the gate that someone's _never_ going to trust you? You're setting yourself up to get hurt from the beginning." Trini nods and he inclines his head a little. "But that's the thing, T — I really haven't known _them_ for three years, so I can't make that call. I've only known Jason, and again, we aren't best mates, but he's definitely opened up to me in that time."

Zack tips his head. "Not Kim though, see. Jason and her only started talking again... December of last year, I think it was. He—" he stops abruptly, clearly considering his next words.

Trini peers back at him, curious.

"I don't want to overstep," he says slowly, furrowing his brow, "so I'll just say that he was a mess for a while after she kind of materialised in his life again. And not a bad mess, but not a good mess?"

He squints a little at his own vagueness, though his face looks softer. And Trini thinks she understands—Kim coming back into Jason's life had been hard on him, and Zack witnessed it firsthand.

Zack gestures vaguely. "Because they lived in the same neighbourhood growing up, right. Were inseparable, the two of them along with their friend Tommy." A little smile pulls at his mouth and he pauses. "Brief tangent: Have you met her?"

Trini shakes her head. "No, but I can hear how fit she is in your voice," she chirps, chuckling.

He laughs lightly as well—an airy, unbridled kind of sound. "When you meet her I wanna be there. She is... wow," he mutters, rubbing at his neck in a rare show of shyness. "I guess it makes sense, her being best friends with Jason and Kim. They're like genetically predisposed to gravitate towards each other or something."

Trini smiles and he continues, "But yeah. When I said earlier that Jason and Kim have history but it's real fucking complicated, _that_ was what I meant. They didn't talk at all for the first two and a half years they were here—I'd never seen her around him or heard anything about her even in passing—then BAM they're glued together at the hip...?"

_Huh. That does sound strange._

"So something happened before, obviously," Trini says slowly.

Zack nods. "Figure so. But it's really none of my business to ask."

"Yeah, of course," she mutters. "They're good now though, right? Regardless of whatever happened before. That's good for us if we're gonna be hanging around them twice a week."

"Absolutely," he says, putting a hand out in halt and bending down to tie his shoelace. "I don't think we should be wary of them unless they give us a reason to be. The two of them seem closed off, but I reckon that's a learned thing."

Trini nods, taking the opportunity to stretch her cramping hamstring. "Yeah, agreed. And my interactions with both of them've been limited so far, but... I dunno." She huffs, sighing. "You know I don't take to people very easy, it's something I'm working on—" he nods kindly, "but the two of them seem to be sailing past all of the traps I've laid out in my mind to snare new people from getting too close. Does that make sense?"

"Look at you, being self-aware," Zack chirps, nodding again.

Trini shrugs. "All I'm saying is that I don't mean to go all inquisition on you with the questions about trusting them. I guess I'm just... trying to be even more cautious? to compensate for all of those alarms being turned off in _myself_ , which is backwards, I know—"

"Not backwards," Zack mutters, smiling down at her. Encouraging, easy, as always. "I'm the same way, though you tend to come off as more of an arse in your particular approach."

She shoves him lightly. "Self-protection and being an arse can look like the same thing much of the time," she drawls, smirking. "And being wary of people can manifest in different ways—I see that in Kimberly especially, though her approach to it is different. It's easier to pick something out in someone's behaviour when it's something you recognise in yourself."

Zack makes an agreeing noise, running a hand up over his brow to keep the sweat out of his eyes.

"I dunno. There's a click there with her, and with Jason," Trini says slowly. "Just like you and I have—we've talked about this before."

He hums. "Like we're holding the same hand of cards, but arranged in a different order."

"Yeah," Trini agrees, sighing. "And that's kind of weird to say at this stage. But that's the feeling I'm getting. Billy included in there, too."

"Isn't weird to say, T. I get what you mean, I really do." He pauses, frowning. "It's strangely... easy? I've never felt anything like it — not so quick, anyway."

Trini shrugs. "Who knows, maybe it'll turn out that we all go our separate ways, right? I'm not particularly invested—not _yet_ —but it's a curious feeling."

They run for a bit in comfortable silence before Trini adds, "To answer your original question though, I like them. I hope we keep hanging out, even if we never really get close."

"Me too," Zack says, speeding up a little and whipping around so he's running backwards, able to meet her eyes. "But regardless of them, you're stuck with _me_ forever now. Hope you're aware."

She smirks. "And I'll never admit it again, but I'm surprisingly okay with that."

He smiles too, pivoting back around to run normally. "As for Billy generally, he's sunshine in a person. You know that."

Trini smiles. "I do."

They continue their run, the entirety of the David Bowie album nearly going by before they slow to a walk, doing one more lap to let their heart rates slow, then stopping beside their bags in the grass, stretching. The sun is sweltering hot, and both of them are sweating heavily.

Once the record finishes proper, Trini waves her wand toward where her gramophone sits in the middle of the pitch. The record sleeves itself mid-air then puts itself away in the built-in storage space within the briefcase, sitting snugly among the rest of the records in her collection.

And the case is magically expanded, certainly. She has a _lot_ of albums in there.

With a little nod to herself, Trini turns back to her bag and groans a little at how gross she feels. In one swift motion she peels her tank top off, adjusting her tattered brown leather wand holster on her forearm and silently thanking whoever enchanted it for making it sweat-proof.

"Hot there, Crazy Girl?" Zack says, mimicking her and stripping his own tight black sleeveless shirt off, bunching it up and using it to wipe his face, brow, and the back of his neck. When he's done he tosses it onto his bag and collapses to lay in the shaded grass. Whoops softly. "That's _so_ much better, oh sweet Jesus."

Trini laughs, stooping down to grab her little towel from her kit duffel. "You know, it's brilliant having another person around who has a muggle-born parent," she mutters, wiping at her own face now. "Hogwarts really deprives us of the most quality expressions here, eh? It's all Merlin this, Merlin that."

Zack smiles. "I kind of love that we don't get in trouble for it though. We can use all the religious curses we want with no retribution."

"Ironic," Trini chirps, smirking, and Zack laughs proper. "Admittedly, I'm a fan of the magical creature ones—" she stretches her calves out a bit, " _and_ the Merlin ones, to be sure. All of them, really. I'm always here for more fun ways to express myself."

"Amen," Zack mutters, a twinkle in his eye, now sitting up a bit and gulping at his water bottle.

Trini drinks some of hers as well before starting to pace a little, fanning at her face with her hand and feeling like some dramatic Victorian noblewoman as she does so. Billy, Jason, and Kimberly should be coming down shortly for their pick-up match, and she'd like to cool down a bit before that, if possible.

She strides out towards her gramophone and stops a few feet away, looking out at the stadium with her back to Zack and contemplating whether she might have time to jump in the showers in the Hufflepuff changeroom.

But her train of thought is interrupted when Zack walks around to stand in front of her, grinning like an idiot.

Trini stares up at him. "What?"

"I do this because I'm your friend," he says, then whips his water bottle out from behind his back and upends it on top of her head.

And it feels great, it does. But he is _dead_ meat.

Trini glares and Zack drops the empty bottle in the grass, backing away from her slowly with his hands raised in the air. "I told you I'd get you back for smacking me before!" he says, still smiling. At the look on her face though, his voice starts to get higher, his words more rushed, "But it worked for you too, didn't it? You were hot! I did a good thing!" Trini just continues to stare daggers at him through another pause, and his eyes widen a little. "I'm a _good_ person T! I am _innocent_!"

She considers him for a moment, a solid ten yards of pitch between them now.

Walking calmly to her gramophone case a few feet away, she—in what truly must be an idea of divine influence—replaces the David Bowie record with something _else_. Positions the needle, cranks it a few more times for good measure. And the volume is still loud as all hell, so when the song—the classic, terrifying organ [theme](https://open.spotify.com/track/4FlueI7VOMLUxJDCoeUDVL) from the Phantom of the Opera—starts to play, the effect is brilliant.

Zack's eyes widen comically, a deer in headlights.

With a kind of eerie calm that would most certainly have sent her little brothers running for the hills by now, she looks down at the record—the compilation album for the musical, [_Highlights From the Phantom of the Opera_](https://open.spotify.com/album/0MAILdDpjU31mPtauV7X85)—as the first song, 'Overture' continues to play. So wickedly appropriate.

Trini looks back up at him, a sly smile starting to tug at the corner of her mouth.

Without so much as a twitch to give herself away until the last moment, she draws her wand out of its holster in a flash, pointing it straight at him. " _Aguamenti_ ," she says drily, voice sounding nonchalant while internally concentrating very, very hard on how she wants the charm to manifest.

The music booms around her, and it's all _very_ dramatic.

Better yet, it works—the spell going full water cannon (but larger around and softer, to be sure, given she doesn't want to _hurt_ him), looking like something sprawling and alive as it shoots towards him, glinting merrily in the sunlight.

Her aim is true and it _blasts_ him backwards spectacularly, sending him soaring through the air in an arc and carrying him in a way that only charmed water could.

She watches this gleefully with a smile that's a little bit manic, she's sure, judging by the way she feels it light up her eyes. And she casts a Cushioning Charm to catch him gently, _lovingly_ as he lands on his arse ten yards away, drenched head to foot and spluttering.

He shakes his head wildly and blinks a few times, staring at her for a moment, completely stunned.

Trini smiles sweetly at him and tosses her wand into the grass beside her, holding her hands up now in a lazy kind of double wave, assuring him she's done.

But Zack's face changes from blank shock to smiling like an absolute idiot, then, and he pulls his wand out from the pocket of his running shorts with a flourish. And she can't hear him say the spell over the music, but in an instant, Trini's buffeted by a literal wall of water that engulfs her for a moment _completely_ before it falls away around her, sloshing about.

Her turn to splutter now, she wipes her face with a quick palm and _beams._ Lunges for her wand madly, diving and sliding on the wet grass; sends another jet of water at him, clutching at her wand with both hands.

Zack ducks, cackling, and brandishes his wand like he's throwing a frisbee underhanded, shooting another stream of water at her that she rolls out of the way of before rocketing to her feet.

His next one hits her square in the face, but not violently.

And _she's_ cackling now as she flat out rushes him, his eyes widening before turning on his heel and sprinting away, _shrieking_ like he's being chased by the devil herself.

He throws jets of water over his shoulder haphazardly, dodging as she continues to fire at him, both of them slipping and sliding on the sodden grass. Soon her eyes are wet not only with spelled water, but with tears at how hard she's laughing.

.

Kim, Jason, and Billy arrive at the Quidditch stadium to see two people sprinting across the far side of the pitch, wands out, one absolutely _peeling_ after the other, clearly mid-chase, stopping and starting, ducking, dodging, weaving.

And it has to be one of the most peculiar things Kim has ever witnessed.

Because something like delicate, calming [_opera_](https://open.spotify.com/track/5otNx6jsF4D3rSEBzeZEhn)—

_"'Think of me, think of me fondly when we've said goodbye...'"_

is BOOMING through the stadium so loudly that Trini and Zack themselves seem soundless from this distance, despite clearly _yelling_ back and forth at each other every few seconds and laughing uproariously.

_"'Remember me, once in a while, please promise me you'll try...'"_

And with them both firing _massive jets of water_ with the circumference of storm drains repeatedly at each other to boot—some rising up into the air like the necks of silver-blue dragons in the afternoon sunlight, then diving in merciless, sparkling arcs—it's the single most bizarre thing that Kim has seen in a very, very long time. A silent slapstick comedy film in real life, complete with the outlandish soundtrack.

It could therefore be deemed understandable that the three of them kind of just stand there, absolutely gobsmacked as they watch, until Kim covers her face with her hand, watching the two of them through her fingers; feeling laughter start to bubble up slowly in her chest, a bewildered smile pulling at her lips.

And at Trini and Zack beginning to come their way, completely unaware of anyone watching them, at Trini chasing him like an absolute _maniac_ , Kim bursts out laughing.

In seconds the laugh has taken over her entire body, reverberating from her stomach up through her ribs, soon finding her face and pulling insistently at her every feature.

Now _crying_ , Kim leans on her broom for support in a manner not at all superfluous.

Jason's whole body is shaking, his hand frozen in the midst of running through his hair as he laughs, and Billy is just standing there with his fist pressed to his mouth, staring at Trini and Zack with one of the _widest_ smiles Kim's ever seen him wear.

"What the _fuck_?" Kim whispers, voice not thick with tears but airy, coming out in a disbelieving squeak. Bent at the middle, teetering a bit precariously, seeing through eyes half-closed with how her smile has taken over her face.

Because really, who the hell _are_ these people?

Luckily for the three of them, the lady singing in the song, bless her, does a big old soprano scale at the end which snaps them out of their daze.

Kim leads the way and walks onto the pitch, her _Nimbus 2001_ in hand, trying to compose herself.

Trini sees them and starts walking their way at once, waving her wand to silence the gramophone then shooting one last jet of water at Zack's legs as an afterthought, which hits the back of his kneecaps and buckles them underneath him, sending him tipping onto the plush grass like he's just been hooked forwards.

Soaked to the bone and looking smug, Trini strides up to them in nothing but a sports bra and a pair of cropped running shorts. And Jason makes some remark that causes Trini to smile, but Kim can't hear him over the racket of her own mind, currently repeating one word ('LEGS!') over and over like a skip on a record.

_Holy fuck, get it together. Stop ogling._

Kim shakes herself a little as Zack comes jogging up behind Trini and taps her on the shoulder, holding his arms open for a hug and absolutely _beaming_. With a smile she wraps her arms around his neck, muscles jumping about under her skin, and he snakes his arms around her waist before lifting her up good-naturedly. Spins her a little, which earns him a laugh.

"That was mental," Zack says softly, releasing her.

And it's an interesting interaction, both of them shirtless for reasons Kim can't comprehend right now past the fact that they're shirtless at _all_ —

And they both really are incredibly good-looking. Trini e s p e c i a l l y—

And Kim didn't think she could be So Fucking Gay as a Known Bisexual yet hEre SHe sTaNDs—

The two of them say a few more things Kim doesn't catch and Trini turns to look at them all proper again. "How much of that did you lot see?"

"All of it," Kim blurts out, though surely not meaning to say anything at all, feeling like she's been hit over the head with a Beater's bat. Trini's Beater bat, maybe. She opens her mouth to say something else then closes it again, then opens it, then closes it.

Jason seems to sense Kim struggling and pulls her out, nodding at Trini. "Quite the show there, you two. Right had us in stitches."

"Looked like you were having a fantastic time," Billy adds, smiling. "Would you both still like to play, or do you think you've tired yourselves out? It's not a problem if it's the latter."

Zack shakes his head and Kim's attention moves to him briefly, noting that he really does have like, a hundred individually defined abs.

_Jason wasn't kidding._

"I'm good to play, no problem Billy," Zack says, looking over at Trini. "You cool too, Crazy Girl?"

Trini smiles, still smug, still causing Kim's heart to flounder about like a fish out of water. "Absolutely."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'morning glory' by oasis.  
> \- fun fact 1: oasis is one of trini's favourite bands of all time. you will find this out LATER!  
> \- fun fact 2: trini calls the mystery person a 'morning glory' because those are Real Life [flowers](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morning_glory#Habit) that come into full bloom in the early morning. 
> 
> .
> 
> OKAY! first of all, happy belated 1st of september to you all.
> 
> second. please, for the love of god, listen to the song that's playing when kim, jason, and billy find trini and zack in the middle of their waterfight. even a few seconds of it. really helps... set the bizarre scene they walk into. 
> 
> sigh. our kids are so stupid! I love them.
> 
> hope you all love them too. I PROMISE we're getting proper trimberly one-on-one interaction next chapter, beyond them ogling at each other and quipping back and forth during quidditch time. (who knows, our girl kim might just FINALLY pluck up the courage to say hello!)
> 
> as for the dialogue-heavy trini/zack hangout, gotta happen sometimes! trini is cautious and zack is a great friend. they meet each other on the same level, which is so lovely. their dynamic is a pleasure to write.
> 
> as always -- thank you all so much for reading, truly. comments are appreciated but no pressure if that isn't your thing. hope you're all having a lovely start to your week, wherever you are.


	10. Sit Next to Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/4BdGO1CaObRD4La9l5Zanz?si=_Y1GkT6sQhi4-al77kBToQ). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Yo," comes a low voice from her left.

Trini looks up as someone casually sails into her row and plops into the seat next to her; movements light, easy, as if their behaviour is completely normal and not at all out of the ordinary. Just a standard Wednesday afternoon in Ancient Runes.

But that person happens to be Kimberly Hart, and Trini didn't even know she was _in_ this class.

"Er, yo?" Trini replies, eyebrow raised.

Kimberly promptly begins making herself at home, pulling her textbook and writing materials out of her bag. "So you sit at the front, eh? I should've guessed," she says conversationally, a note of mischief in her voice.

Trini huffs, though there's a tiny hint of playfulness that sneaks into _her_ tone in kind when she mutters, "What's that supposed to mean, Kimberly?"

"Please, call me Kim. My mum doesn't even full-name me," Kim quips, smirking. "And I just mean, like, isn't there something about high-achievers or whatever sitting at the front?" She pauses, scrunching up her face a little. "Though actually, I'm fairly sure that's a myth..."

Trini just keeps staring at her, eyebrow fixed in place.

Kim shrugs coolly, though her voice comes out a bit quicker to explain, "In my quest to beat Granger at everything, I like to keep up to date with the top few students in every subject. Your name tends to come up quite often."

"You're backtracking 'cause you were going to make a joke about my height, weren't you?"

The corner of Kim's mouth twitches. "In theory I _could_ have considered it, but I'm not sure if we're there yet in our budding friendship. Wouldn't want to come across as an arse."

Trini hums. "More than usual, you mean?"

Kim chuckles and inclines her head, conceding defeat. Leans back in her chair to balance on the back two legs and glance around lazily at the students taking their seats in the rows behind them. Her mouth pulls into a charming half-smile in that... cocky, Top Scorer Quidditch Chaser way that Trini has become familiar with in their fairly limited interactions so far.

And Trini has witnessed guys exude this type of charm—she's seen it from Cedric, for example, at many a Hufflepuff Quidditch party—but she never understood what people found so irresistible in those moments, given the only thing she's ever felt for awesome players is great respect. She didn't get how being a sports star made a person more _attractive_.

Until she met Kim, that is.

Trini understands now.

She understands so much that she actively pictures the more controlled and rational section of her brain hauling off the other part—the one that is currently _swooning_ —in a fireman's carry and away from her conscious mind.

_Stop being so GAY, TRINI!_

Trini tips her head and pretends to consider her words for a moment. "How about this: if you acknowledge that you're only a half foot taller than me, I'll permit you to make jokes," she says, tone still dead serious. "I'm calling you _Kim_ now, after all — I feel like we've reached a more casual point. Poking fun is allowed."

Kim nods. "Deal. Acknowledged. Though..." she trails off, pausing. "May I _just_ say that putting the word 'only' before 'half a foot' when we're talking about height is a bit of a _reach_."

And all at once her eyes are brighter, slowly crinkling at the sides from trying not to laugh at her own joke.

Trini groans, though a large part of her wants to really, really laugh too. A small smile forms on her lips involuntarily. "Starting right up then, are we? I guess I authorised this."

Kim smiles back then her face changes; it becomes softer, almost, and her voice quiets slightly, "If it legitimately ever bothers you please let me know, okay? I'll totally stop—as much as I can be a runaway train sometimes with the banter, I'd never want to hurt your feelings or anything."

_...Huh._

Admittedly, Trini's taken aback at the honesty in her tone. It's reminiscent of the first time they met, where Kim was surprisingly candid with her, completely unprompted. A pleasant surprise then, of course, but even more so now.

Because up until this moment, that first meeting has proven to be an outlier—since the five of them started playing pick-up games together, all Kim's really offered Trini by way of conversation is joking remarks and sarcastic quips. And Trini doesn't particularly _mind_ , given she herself isn't one to jump into friendships headfirst either; there's a natural and expected thawing period as people get more comfortable with each other, and she's not in a rush.

Or... she's trying not to be. 

Her and Kim clicked the first time they spoke, after all. It's certainly not everything; not a promise or a guarantee, but there's some potential for them to get along, at the very least. 

It's a start, really. With any luck, they might just come to know each other a bit better in time. And as much as Trini's determined to go slow with it, any sincerity from Kim's end is welcome.

Truly, she's more than willing to meet Kim halfway.

So Trini answers in a voice that's soft, as well. "You know, you're surprisingly sweet underneath all the bravado," she says, eyes catching on how Kim opens her mouth then closes it, unsure of how to respond. "I'll speak up if it bugs me, sure, but you have to do the same on your end. Budding friendship and all that."

Kim hums happily just as Professor Babbling—in all her badassery—comes striding into the room, waving her wand to soften the light coming from the large hanging lamps above them as she goes.

Trini's only ever fancied one teacher in her entire life, and Professor Babbling is that teacher. She always sits in the back of her classes at Hogwarts because being in the front usually makes her anxious, but this one and Potions—which is solely because of Billy's preference—are the exceptions.

As it happens, she would be lying if she said that her choice of seating in this class was _entirely_ academic.

With the Professor's arrival the lesson begins, and as they go through it Trini regards Kim curiously in her peripherals every now and then. Each of them has their guard down in favour of focusing on the material, and working beside each other like this is... nice. In the simple setting of the dimly-lit classroom, it's comfortable.

Third period passes quickly and soon enough, the lamps are returned to their former—seemingly blinding, now—brightness. Kim stretches lavishly, stifling a yawn behind her hand as Trini takes off her reading glasses and puts them in their case, her own eyelids heavy as well.

"What do you have now?" Kim asks, as they both start to pack their stuff up. Her voice gravelly from not talking for the last hour or so.

"Free period. I'd usually go back to my room or something, but I told Zack I'd meet him in the library to keep him company," Trini replies, feeling oddly talkative in her sleepy state, words slipping out past her filters easier than usual. They file with everyone else toward the classroom doors and she puts more of her weight on one foot, trying to get rid of the pins and needles.

"How about you?" Trini asks, as they come out into the corridor and fall into step with one another. She runs her hand through her hair and rubs at the side of her face, trying to wake herself up a bit.

Kim smiles warmly. "I have free period too, actually. So do Jason and Billy, and funny enough, _we_ all have planned to meet in the library."

Trini makes a face, pleasantly surprised. "Cool. You going straight there, or?"

Kim inclines her head, readjusting her bag slightly on her shoulder. "Yeah." She pauses for a moment, hesitating. "But, like, if you would rather not be seen entering the library with me, or walking through the school in general together, I can split off and take a different route..." she says, tone joking.

As Trini glances sidelong at her though, she sees a flicker of uncertainty in Kim's eyes.

_Ah, shit._

Day-to-day, Trini actively tries to keep herself at an even keel. She's quite reserved as a person, but that demeanour can be read as 'I don't care, get out of my face' by a lot of people.

(And much of the time, that is _exactly_ what she means, but that's not the case here.)

Her and Kim click quite solidly on the humour chemistry front, though, so she was under the impression that she was navigating it a bit better than usual.

Guess not.

Trini's heart sinks as she begins to rack her brain quickly. Had she said something to make Kim feel that way?

She decides not to draw attention to it in favour of reassuring her instead, as Kim is clearly trying to mask it. "I know you're joking, but for the record, if I don't like someone I generally don't permit them to make jokes about my height, for one. Nor would I commit to playing pick-up with them multiple times a week, indefinitely."

Kim's face brightens at that, and she smiles softly at Trini before bringing her hand up to play with her choker necklace absentmindedly.

They continue the rest of the way in a neutral kind of silence—not familiar enough with each other for it to be comfortable, but not strangers enough for it to be awkward either. And in weaving through the corridors filled with students, Trini finds the energy invigorating; everyone's still bubbly to be back at Hogwarts despite it being the third week of classes already.

It doesn't take them long to make it to the library, and as they look around for their separate study dates they're met with a surprise: the three boys are situated together in one of the cozy reading rooms at a large rectangular table next to some windows. It's just a bit down the way from Billy's tiny secluded desk that he uses when he's working alone—somewhat of a perch off one of the narrow second floor walkways, where Trini jinxed Warrington and Montague last spring for messing with him.

"Hi Kim, hi Trini!" Billy greets, smiling at them from his place at the end of the table, a large bookshelf at his back. "Zack found Jason and I — we figured the five of us could sit together. Is that okay with you both?"

"That's perfect," Trini answers. Kim smiles at him and nods her agreement, then walks around the table to sit next to Jason.

Trini sits next to Zack—who already has a bunch of books and materials spread out in front of him for his Muggle Studies essay—and returns his offered fist bump fondly. Once she's situated, she promptly puts her head down on top of her arms, just to shut her eyes for a moment.

.

And it's much longer than a moment, because when she comes to, it's darker outside than it was before.

Trini blinks slowly as she registers a gentle hand on her left shoulder and props her head up on one palm. Finding four pairs of eyes regarding her kindly.

"Morning," Jason whispers across the table. "We didn't want to wake you, hope that's okay."

Trini squints. "'S definitely okay," she slurs out, then grips the back of her neck, grimacing a little. It's going to be stiff for a few minutes. "Hungry though, did I miss supper?" she asks, hiding a yawn behind her hand.

"No, Crazy Girl," Zack answers, removing his hand from her shoulder. "We're just about to go down. Figured you'd had enough beauty sleep and we've all finished our schoolwork."

"Cool, cool."

.

The start of lunch hour the next day finds Trini turning into the Charms corridor, intent on talking to Professor Flitwick in advance of their lesson next period.

_But— ah._

Up ahead stands a familiar silhouette, back to her—identifiable by a shock of choppy shoulder-length raven hair and an easy lean up against the doorframe of Flitwick's classroom. And Trini has an urge to huff as she wonders how someone can look so _cool_ while just fucking standing there, stupid olive green rucksack slung over one shoulder, right heel lifted and pivoting back and forth like a pendulum. Radiating both attentive interest and ease, somehow.

Trini mentally slaps herself to her senses as she approaches quietly, and Kim doesn't turn around. She manages to catch some of the conversation as she gets closer, "...invisible, then? Maybe if I keep going I'll get there," Kim is saying, with a smile in her voice.

Professor Flitwick's squeaky cadence carries out of the classroom, "Certainly! Just like any spell, the more you practise — and a natural affinity helps, of course—"

Trini pops her head through the door and Kim starts a little, having clearly not registered her approaching at all.

Flitwick smiles. "Ah, and here, an example of natural Charms affinity has materialised! Hello, Miss Gomez."

Trini feels a slight blush colour her cheeks at the praise, glancing sidelong at Kim, who still looks at ease. "Sorry to interrupt — Professor, should I come back?"

Professor Flitwick shakes his head. "No, that won't be necessary. I have your assignment right here—" he reaches a tiny hand across his desk and sifts through a pile of parchment for a moment before finding what he's looking for, "it's quite intensive. Should keep you busy!"

Trini walks past Kim and up to his desk, taking the offered page with thanks. It's an extra assignment to keep her occupied during the classes where she finishes the set work well before everyone else—Flitwick suggested the arrangement to her last winter, but she wasn't too keen on the idea of extra homework.

With their O.W.L.'s taking place next year though (as Professor McGonagall has reminded them countless times already) she figured it might be handy to _actually_ learn during her downtime in Charms lessons. She's never really been able to bring herself to make use of the extra class time and focus on other, non-Charms schoolwork; this arrangement is certainly better than staring off into space.

And at her own insistence she didn't want Flitwick approaching her about it during class hours—preferring to avoid unwanted questions—so here she is.

Trini peers down at the parchment briefly and thanks him again. Turning on her heel, she makes her way back out of the classroom and towards Kim, who's still leaning against the doorframe, foot stilled and arms crossed casually. Watching her with soft, though somehow unreadable, eyes.

And Kim gives her a little smile as she passes by, which Trini returns; though hers is small, tight-lipped—similar to the reflexive face small town residents pull while passing on the street—and coupled with a curt incline of her head.

She's away and halfway down the corridor when she hears Kim speak, "Thanks for the help, Professor. I'll see you next week."

"Certainly. And good work today, Miss Hart."

Trini registers a bit of a shuffle from behind her before Kim's voice, a softer tone now, reaches her ears again, "Hey, wait up." And she turns her head to the side, not stopping but slowing her steps just enough to be noticeable.

Kim reaches her a moment later. "Where're you off to now?"

"Library," Trini answers, continuing to walk as Kim falls into step beside her. "Need to take out a book for this assignment—" she raises her hand a little and waves the parchment lightly, "so I can work on it if need be."

Kim nods. "No lunch?"

"Grabbed sandwiches from the kitchens," Trini says, keeping her tone even and tapping her rucksack. "I wasn't intending on going to the Great Hall." She pauses, tipping her head to the side to look at Kim. "You?"

"Hadn't really decided," Kim says, shrugging. "Lunch probably, yeah. I usually eat with Jason and Billy."

Trini hums her acknowledgement. She's certainly seen Kim at both the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw tables before, but the concept still strikes her as a bit odd. Inter-House friendships certainly exist, and there's no _rule_ against sitting at another House's table, but she's been firmly inside a Hufflepuff bubble ever since she got to Hogwarts. It's comfortable, safe, and she's never once sat anywhere else at mealtimes.

They fall into that same neutral silence as they walk, extending right up to their arrival at the Grand Staircase, where they have to diverge—Kim down to the Great Hall and Trini up to the library.

Kim speaks then, voice casual, "You know, if you want I could come with you. We could grab your book then go down to lunch together and sit with the boys?" 

The last bit is more of a question than the rest—a tentativeness, almost, leaking through her easy tone. It seems contrary to what Trini knows of Kim so far, having come to the conclusion that any kind of socialisation is second-nature to her.

And Trini's roommates are currently down in the common room, scrambling to finish up their homework for next class; her grand plans for lunch included parking herself near them and spending some quality time sprawled on a couch, so it's not like she would be missing much by going to the Great Hall. 

"Er," Trini starts, blinking once. "Yeah, sure."

Kim gives her a small smile and the two of them direct their steps towards the library, ascending the Grand Staircase; nearly empty of people, what with most of the school down at lunch.

Up one floor and they turn off, soon passing the usual suits of armour, paintings, statues; and Trini finds herself considering just how a place so familiar can at once feel _different_ with someone new walking beside her. Because Kim's been at Hogwarts for just as many years as Trini has, of course, existing in the same space; reading the same textbooks, playing the same sport, walking the same corridors. Ships passing in the night, maybe.

But here they are now, side by side. Going the same way. And deliberately!

Trini can't put her finger on what it is that she's feeling exactly, but she registers the change; and in the back of her mind, she knows it's... _something._

Noting a small surge in her own willingness to chat, Trini pulls a funny face. "Wait, if I sit with you lot, does that mean I have to interact with Zack for an hour too?"

Kim chuckles. "Can't promise either way. He tends to make appearances at unpredictable moments."

Trini nods sagely, allowing herself to smile a little, consciously dropping the blank look. "Should've figured."

Kim hums. Hesitates for the briefest of moments. "Have you two known each other long? I only just met him earlier this year."

"Same," Trini replies. "But we clicked really fast." She pauses, tilting her head. "I don't know what that says about me, given he's an idiot, but he's easy to get along with."

"You two would be cute together," Kim says, voice light, a bit teasing.

Trini scoffs. "Absolutely not. He's... not my type, trust me," she mutters, in what she hopes is a convincing voice, something light without being too obvious or insistent. And for a heartbeat she considers going one step further, telling Kim that Zack isn't her type because he's a _boy_ , specifically, before thinking better of it.

It's such an unfamiliar urge—to share something that she considers _so_ personal with someone who's practically a stranger—and she's... struck by it. Kim is someone she barely knows, so why on earth would she tell her that? She doesn't have to defend her relationship with Zack to anybody, and Kim's just joking around.

Instead, Trini flips it. "I could say the same about you and Wonderboy."

Kim's turn to scoff, now. "We get that a lot. He's my best friend and I love him to death, but not like that."

Trini hums, though she doesn't _entirely_ believe her, regardless of what Zack told her last week on their run. And given Kim didn't seem to exactly accept what she said about not fancying Zack either, it doesn't feel too hypocritical. "Whatever you say."

"How about you come find me when you end up dating Zack, okay?" Kim chimes, as they cross through the wood-paneled entrance threshold and into the library. Her voice drops down to a whisper as she peers around, as if to check if the coast is clear, "I'll be the one holding the sign that says, 'I told you so.'"

Trini doesn't dignify that with a response, instead shooting Kim a deadpan glare and leading the way to where she expects her Charms book to be shelved. The familiar smell of ancient wood, parchment, and ink fills her nose, and she sighs contentedly.

Once they reach the stacks Kim bobs up and down on the balls of her feet, rocking her weight gently, humming a [tune](https://open.spotify.com/track/5eHPODjuuKkrJXwhhaMaQa?si=oAnaA4kzSjuHiufltLY5og) under her breath that Trini doesn't recognise. Clearly content to wait while Trini runs a finger down book spines, skimming the titles, trying to find it.

After a minute or so, Trini lets out an impatient huff. "How about I just do this—" she steps back once from the towering bookshelf and takes her wand out of its holster, eyes locked on the title of the book Professor Flitwick wrote at the top of her assignment. " _Accio_ ," she mutters, focusing intently.

A few feet above their heads a book pops off the shelf, teetering a little before soaring down to her outstretched hand. She plucks it out of the air, satisfied, and looks over to Kim, who's stopped her humming and has her eyebrow raised in surprise.

"You know the Summoning Charm already?" Kim asks, eyes warm, curious.

Trini nods, waving casually. "Yeah. That was my first assignment a couple weeks ago." She looks down at the book then back up to Kim. "Ready to go?"

"Yeah, sure," Kim replies quietly, turning on her heel and leading them out back into the main part of the library. 

As they walk, Trini considers for a few moments before placing her wand between her teeth. Her pace slows a bit and Kim matches it, walking shoulder-to-shoulder and peering at her with puzzled interest.

"We can stop for a moment, you know—" Kim tries, amusement colouring her voice.

"I've got it," Trini mutters around her wand, talking in much the same way as she does when there's a toothbrush in her mouth. Determined to look semi-graceful in her efforts, she flips the library book open carefully, balancing it on her left palm. Glancing up once to make sure she doesn't walk into anybody, she grabs her wand and pokes at the borrowing card peeking out of the pocket affixed to the inside of the back cover. "Trini Gomez. Er, three weeks, please."

She feels Kim watching her, that gentle mirth still giving her voice a lilt as she asks, "So you don't need to say the name of the thing you're Summoning, then? I thought I'd read that."

Trini shrugs, watching the borrowing card fly up and out of the book pocket to hover a couple feet in front of her face, moving with them as they walk. She could sign her own name manually but this is easier, watching 'T. Gomez' appear on the card as if written by an invisible hand. "You do at the beginning, and if you're ever distracted then you might as well. Even after you've got the general hang of it, mind," she answers, as the due date is printed both on the tiny grid pasted to the back cover and the borrowing card. "But as you get going proper, definitely not. The spell relies on intent, that's it. At least after some practise."

Kim hums, and with a dismissive wave of Trini's wand the borrowing card sails up and away, joining a few others high above their heads to fly like a gaggle of geese towards the circulation desk. And it's not that she avoids the desk as a rule, but Madam Pince is often away from it, off prowling elsewhere in the library. It usually takes some time for her to materialise, and Trini doesn't want to make Kim wait around.

"Makes sense," Kim returns, nodding thoughtfully. "It'd be a pain to continually have to name things." She pauses, turning her head a little, eyeing Trini in her peripherals as they walk towards the library entrance, passing a few keen students here and there who are posted up for their lunch hour—the scratching of quills, turn of pages, and chatter of low voices spinning into a gentle working melody around them.

"So erm, you've got extra assignments from Flitwick, then?" Kim asks, after a few moments. "Do you choose what you want to learn?" Her voice is tentative, though she's clearly trying for something more casual. And by Trini's regular measure of sharing _anything_ at all with someone she barely knows, it really isn't any of Kim's business.

Nevertheless, she inexplicably finds herself a lot more willing to answer than normal. Which... seems to be a building trend, where Kim is concerned.

It's just a question, after all. Kim's trying to show interest, which is a nice gesture.

_Budding friendship, right?_

"Sort of," Trini replies slowly, swinging her rucksack off one shoulder to place the book inside. "We discuss it and go from there." She pauses, consciously reminding herself to be more forthcoming. "Mind, I've only been doing it for three weeks? But when he pitched it to me last year he said if there's something in particular I want to learn that's not on the curriculum yet, or not at all, I could swing it by him."

Kim looks impressed. "That's cool. Keeps you busy when you're done assignments early, I expect?"

"Yep. Something you understand quite well, I'm sure," Trini chimes, bringing a teasing lilt into her voice. But Kim feigns confusion, clearly trying to look humble. "Quit it with the modesty. I keep track of the top students in our year _too_ , you know."

Kim tips her head back a little. "Er, right." She pauses, looking hesitant. "Yeah, McGonagall does the same thing with me in Transfiguration..." she trails off, furrowing her brow. "Well, she used to. Not since last winter now, I guess."

And Trini wants to ask for more information, but it's easy to tell that Kim's being vague on purpose. It's none of _her_ business, anyway. "I'm actually enjoying it so far," she says instead. "The extra assignments, I mean. And that's... so lame, but I really do like the material. Reckon it can't hurt to have a few more spells in my back pocket."

Kim nods, a soft smile spreading over her face, smoothing her brow back to something more at ease. "Yeah. Once I've got everything under control a bit better I'd like to go back to doing it too."

They continue to chat as they walk, soon arriving at the top of the marble staircase. The Entrance Hall beckons below them, littered with students making their way into and out from lunch.

Trini makes a vague gesture. "Lead the way."

Kim does a little hop to start down the steps, altogether seeming lighter now than she was a few minutes ago, turning her head slightly every couple paces as if to check that Trini's still with her. They angle to the left and into the Great Hall, making their way past the Slytherin, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff tables—the last finds Trini almost turning to approach it out of habit—before coming to Gryffindor, situated furthest from the doors.

Trini peers around at the mostly unfamiliar faces, feeling entirely out of place, as Kim looks about for all of five seconds before turning to Trini and gesturing for her to follow.

They walk the length of the hall to the very end, closest to the staff table, where Billy, Zack, Jason, and a bunch of other Gryffindors are sitting, eating and chatting away.

"Hey Gomez," Rocky greets, clearly pleasantly surprised.

Trini gives him an upwards jerk of her head. "Sup."

Kim indicates the bit of bench beside Billy, where some of the other kids budge up to make more room for them without prompt. "Sorry we're late," is all she says, not making a scene out of Trini being there, which strikes her as considerate. As if Kim knows instinctively that Trini would much prefer that there's no big announcement.

So Trini takes her place beside Kim, with a little sliver of space between them that makes her feel comfortable, but not too squished. And it's strange initially, this being her first time sitting away from the Hufflepuff table _ever_. But as the minutes pass—as she starts to eat, listening to the jovial conversation (even contributing here and there), with Kim soon laughing beside her—she begins to think that sitting at other House tables might not be so odd after all.

Maybe Kim's been onto something all along, really.

Because here's Zack, throwing quip after quip at Trini across the table, gentle light dancing in his eyes. Billy at her shoulder, with his book propped up on an elegant little stand that she doesn't doubt he made himself. Jason, who's elbowing Zack repeatedly for no reason at all except to be annoying, Zack stealing his food in retaliation; the purest example of 'boys will be boys' that Trini can imagine, in this moment.

And, yeah. Kim too—palpably less subdued as soon as they arrived, a carefree energy coming off of her now that Trini's only seen rivaled on the Quidditch pitch. It's like there's a safety in the familiarity that exists right here at this table; a safety which Kim is actively leaning into. Allowing herself to because she trusts it will hold.

Trini isn't even sure how she _knows_ that save for that it's all over Kim in the same way that magic is apparent to all of them—something that can be felt and sensed as certain as anything she knows to be true in the world. It's like a bright light radiating off of Kim, even mirrored on _Jason's_ face as he watches her from across the table, eyes lingering, soft and warm; something like pride shining back, blazing like fire. 

And if the people make the place, Trini thinks she might just be okay with sitting here sometimes. Not every meal, of course, because her House is home and that won't change. She would miss it terribly, the sense of belonging. That besides, she's quite sure that if she were to ever stop sitting with the Hufflepuffs altogether, Cedric _would_ have her head.

Summer certainly would have no qualms with hunting her for sport.

But sitting here—in a relatively foreign territory while surrounded by friendly faces—is certainly something different than what she's used to. It's so much like discovery, brimming with potential.

Seeming to sense her ruminating, Zack searches her eyes for a moment before smiling wide at her across the table. Bops the toe of her trainer gently with his before lobbing a roll her way, which she catches easily.

.

"So you're still good for Sunday, right?"

Kim nods once in answer, too focused on tipping a handful of chopped-up ingredients into her bubbling cauldron to reply proper. Once her cutting board is clear, she puts it aside and sighs heavily, finally done with the lesson's assignment.

Tipping her head back a bit, she squeezes her eyes shut and rubs at her temple, fighting a headache. It's Friday evening, and having double Potions as her last class every week is proving to be even more unfortunate than she anticipated.

Exhibit A: their dungeon classroom is presently full of thick vapour from all of the cauldrons boiling their contents simultaneously, and the resulting wet chattering sound, though not half-bad for masking a clandestine conversation, is driving her up the _wall._

Normally it wouldn't bother her to this... extent. Auditory rubbish tends to reach her brain jumbled as a general rule, sure, like there's a detour somewhere in her ears that tangles it up before it reaches its destination, but it doesn't always _amplify_ the way it is right now. Day-to-day, her normal is usually one of two options: either she's aware of _everything_ around her or she's honed in on one thing intensely—there's almost never an in-between. And the circumstances that determine which setting she'll be on at any given moment in time vary (though she's much better at understanding what those are than she used to be). 

But if there's one thing she knows, it's that she's leagues more sensitive to sensory input when she has a headache; lights get brighter, sounds become excruciating, smells can make her nauseous. If stressed out or tired on top of that, it's game over. 

Jason, who also knows this (bless him), picks her cutting board up absentmindedly and waves his wand. Muttering a cleaning spell over it, he replaces it on the table, having finished his own potion a minute before she did.

Kim smiles and pats his arm in thanks.

"Alright," he says, continuing their conversation. "Just checking—if you want to play less or whatever, let me know." He speaks quietly as to not be overheard by a nearby Snape, who's in the middle of scowling his way around the dungeon. "Don't want to be a pain in the arse."

"Jase, I _like_ playing with everyone," Kim mutters, furrowing her brow. She looks up at him from where she was double-checking the potion recipe in her textbook. "Do I really seem that miserable all the time?"

And she asks it with a bit of a playful note in her voice, trying to cover the twinge of hurt. She thought she was doing better at not looking pissed off constantly.

"No," Jason replies, sighing. "Just know you've a lot going on, K. It has nothing to do with your _very_ real resting bitch face."

She pokes him in the ribs, smiling, and he resists the urge to jump, eyeing Snape as he walks further away from them. "Really am trying to fix that, you know."

Jason shakes his head. "You don't have to, mate—I'm joking. Nobody has to smile all the time anyway. That shite's exhausting." He pauses for a moment, tipping his head to the side. "If your face is a bitch when it rests, let it be." Kim rolls her eyes at his phrasing, and he flashes a goofy smile. Certainly trying to make her feel better a little, which she loves him for. "Better to have it at neutral than to spend energy on arranging it a particular way. I certainly don't give a damn."

"But the others do, don't they?" Kim asks quietly, unsure. "Trini, Zack, all the Gryffindors you hang around..." she trails off, brushing the pad of her thumb over the corner of her textbook as her gaze falls on Zack at the table next door. There's enough space between them that he won't overhear, but she keeps her voice low anyway. "I want them to think I'm nice, and looking more approachable _helps_ , right?"

Jason's face softens, hearing the sincerity in her tone. "You're overthinking it. I talk you up to the Gryffindors already—because I love you—so you really don't need to do anything intensive to make them like you. They already do." The corner of Kim's mouth pulls up in acknowledgement, a tight-lipped smile that's more like a twitch, and he takes her hand under the table, sensing her insecurity. "As for Zack, he seems curious about you, which is a good sign. He's asked me a few things."

Kim's eyebrow quirks. "And?"

"And nothing," Jason says easily, shaking his head a little. "Roommate confidentiality. He asked about Billy before too—just interested in what you both're like, now that we've all been hanging around each other a bit."

She nods slowly. "Well, I suppose it's good I haven't scared him away."

"He's an intuitive bloke. Even if you _did_ look ticked all the time—which you don't—he'd be able to see past it." He pauses, looking contemplative. "As for Trini, I can't make heads or tails of her. She's a little shit just like you."

That's the impression Kim's got so far as well, and she chuckles. "Emphasis on the little."

Jason hums. "But she strikes me as a no-bullshit kind of person," he says, shrugging. "Meaning you don't need to put on an act for her, I'd expect. And she _does_ look angry or indifferent most of the time—" he smirks, "so I'm sure you two could bond over that, if nothing else."

"Or I could just chat with her about Quidditch all day," Kim muses, a playful sing-song in her voice. "In all seriousness, she's _really_ good, eh?"

He eyes her curiously, something calculating flickering in his gaze before disappearing. "She is. Don't think I've ever seen anyone go toe-to-toe with you on the pitch like she does, truly."

Kim flashes a smug smile. "Bet your arse you haven't. We _have_ to keep her—at this rate, I'll be a better player going into next season even with the IHC being cancelled this year."

"You Slytherins and your _ambition_ ," he mutters, smiling.

"Oh, shut up," she says, poking him in the ribs again, and he really jumps this time. The both of them freeze as Snape looks over, eyeing them dangerously for a moment before turning away again.

Kim waits until the coast is clear, not wanting to die today (at the slimy hands of an amateur Dracula impersonator, no less). "I genuinely would like to hang out with her—and Zack—even if we weren't all playing together," she mutters insistently, smirking. "Hence the whole me trying to will my stupid mug to look more friendly and all."

Jason gives a vague tip of the head. "Yeah, yeah. And I'm glad you like them, but I still mean what I said: I know you have a lot going on, so don't feel obligated to play with us all the time." He pauses, arranging his face into a silly frown. "And your mug is not stupid. It's lovely the way it is."

"Thank you _mum_ ," she chimes, though she can feel her affection for him warming her eyes. And he must see it, because he smiles sincerely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'sit next to me' by foster the people.
> 
> so! our kim finally plucked up the courage to approach trini in ancient runes!!! all that self-talk works, kids. but is kim flirting? is _trini_ flirting? are they just joking around? is it boTH?! only time will tell!
> 
> but yes. we have both of them working on being more approachable in a general sense, each not practised at that for different reasons. otherwise, we're getting there with the team building, more establishing familiarity and all that jazz -- trini's working on stepping out of her comfort zone when it comes to new people and experiences and kim's trying to do the same (though her tendency to not sleep a whole lot isn't doing her any favours). they're both trying their best!!!
> 
> if it isn't clear, kim's got adhd and those bits about how she processes sound etc are a direct nod to that. same thing RE her difficulty with sleeping normally and her physical behaviour -- note the rocking on her feet, bouncing her knee, shuffling... generally being like an idle animation in a videogame, yaknow.
> 
> an aside: crushing on professor bathsheda babbling is a universal hogwarts student mood, I don't make the rules. to understand, picture the hottest teacher you've ever had then cross that with rachel weisz's entire Aesthetic from the mummy movies. add some swooshy wizarding robes and you're good to go! you're welcome.
> 
> thanks for reading, all! hope you're having a lovely day/night. look out for some fun hufflepuff house lore building next chapter, along with a Very Soft trimberly scene. our girls might just have more in common than either of them realised.


	11. Superposition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/67YPjbcxUypwNOwYBZquq1?si=5ZRB0zOiR92YBmg9ZM41eg). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Trini walks into her dormitory and lets out a content sigh, toeing her trainers off at the mat by the door and padding through the room. It's similarly constructed to the common room: walled in light stone with the same honey-coloured wood everywhere. A massive burnished copper lamp hangs from the ceiling in the centre, with four more—much smaller, of course—spread around, one hanging above each of their beds.

It's different from the common room in one very distinct way, though—there aren't any windows whatsoever. And originally, Trini had been worried about this. But the earthy feeling that the whole place has about it makes up for the absence somehow, and the numerous potted plants hanging from the ceiling help substantially. With the yellow light from the centre lamp shining through the greenery, it's easy to forget that she's underground altogether.

Moving over to her nook—the first on the left—she comes to her bunk, which is recessed into the wall six feet or so, allowing for her entire massive bed to fit sideways. It's a loft setup, with her bed high up off the ground on sturdy wood posts and situated above a small work area.

She ducks slightly to start down the three wood steps that take her to the sunken square of space right beneath her bed, mirroring its size and shape. A bookcase sits to her right that houses her comic and record collections, schoolbooks, any leisure books she intends to read (if she has time), and gramophone. On the left is a corner desk that runs about half the length of her bed and the entire width of it, along the wall opposite the bookcase. Her pet Kneazle Sabre is curled up on the end and greets her with a _chirp_ ; Trini runs a hand through her fur, making cooing noises under her breath.

And she's found it comforting, being surrounded like this; as if she's got her own little house within the dorm. She's felt at home here since the moment she arrived.

Trini drops her bag next to the bookcase and makes a beeline for the parcel sitting atop her desk, waiting for her since she dropped it off after breakfast this morning. She sits in her chair to open the brown paper carefully, certain that she knows what it is—

When she pulls the record sleeve out, she _beams_. There's a note on top and she unfolds it,

_Trini,_

_Here we are! If Griffin gets this to you as fast as I know he can, then this album is hot off the press. It will look like it's been taken out because it has—I took a listen. Hope you don't mind. Let me know what you think! I will refrain from commenting until you write._

_Love you to the moon and back,_

_Dad_

Trini smiles down at the note and puts it on her desk, taking the crisp new record—[ _Day For Night_](https://open.spotify.com/album/3qtWDY2yl7NGrpCYqxrUt6?si=mMvT6vc7RkGx6utBCOSkBg) by one of her favourite bands, The Tragically Hip—out of its sleeve. Walking over to her gramophone, she sets it up and waves her wand to charm the volume to increase. Rotating the crank a few times, the album starts to play.

Letting out a content sigh, she takes her books out of her bag and sits in her desk chair again, starting to research for Professor Binns' essays that he's just set—one for every week of the next month or so.

And she always listens to music when she works; it helps her think when she's writing essays or doing assignments. Studying is a different story—she needs total silence for memorisation especially. But sitting here, she finds that listening to a brand new album while researching the Goblin Rebellions of the eighteenth century is a great way to unwind.

.

A half hour later or so Trini sees movement out of the corner of her eye and turns, finding Chip outside her workspace waving.

Trini grabs her wand and twitches it at her gramophone, bringing the volume down from where it was just shy of shaking the floor. She has a sound muffling charm on the whole area under her bed so that she can play music as loud as she wants without disturbing her roommates, and it's a setup that has served her well.

Bringing the charm down too, Trini flashes a sincere smile. "Hey."

Chip smiles back. "Hey, sorry to bug. _Reading Room_ is starting in five — you're coming right?"

Trini blinks and nods, stretching a little. _Reading Room_ is one of her favourite things about Hogwarts—where a group of Hufflepuffs read and very casually act out a story for the rest of the House every week. It's the closest thing they have to a theatre company, and it's a wildly popular and respected Hufflepuff tradition. As far as ways to spend a Saturday night go, hanging out with what amounts to nearly her entire House is top tier.

She stops the gramophone and ascends the little stairs out of her workspace, shuffling her feet into her fluffy slippers and grabbing a bag of crisps from their communal shelf near the door. Chip comes walking up behind her and they exit their dormitory, stepping out into the main hallway and walking towards the common room.

They find it packed with people: sitting on the plush overstuffed furniture, sprawled out on massive beanbags that are scattered about, or straight up laying on the floor in piles of pillows and blankets. At the opposite end of the room to the entrance there's an open space where a raised, slightly tilted stage platform has been set up, mostly blocked from their view by a rag-tag of old bedsheets fastened together to serve as a curtain.

Chip steps ahead and leads Trini into the mass of people, weaving through carefully before finding Summer starfished obnoxiously on their favourite giant yellow beanbag, saving them seats.

"Budge up," Trini mutters, waving her away so that they can sit down.

"'Thank you, Summer,'" Summer drawls, shifting to make space then laying back to stare at the ceiling, eyes half-lidded, dozing.

Gia comes traipsing through the crowd and drops a brown paper bag on Summer's stomach; the smell of chicken fingers and chips fills the air immediately. "How about, 'Thank you, _Gia_ ,'" she chimes, patting Summer on the head before sitting down next to her.

Summer pulls a silly face and sits up, leaning into Gia gently. "Thanks."

Trini reaches into the bag and takes a couple chicken fingers out, popping one halfway into her mouth and handing the other to Chip. "Thank you both," she says sincerely. Until she smelled the food, she hadn't realised how hungry she was.

Chip already has a few handfuls of crisps piled in the front of her jumper, using it as a bowl, and takes the offered chicken finger happily before handing Trini the crisp bag.

Gia promptly swipes it and Trini rolls her eyes.

"Alright, everyone! We're starting. Please take your seats—" calls Dustin Brooks, one of the _Readers_ and the Keeper on their Quidditch team. He's wearing a tall, ancient-looking top hat which looks like it's had a hole blown clean through the centre of it, and seems to have swapped his regular floppy brown hair for a more voluminous and flaming orange style. There's a bit of a bustle and a few noises of grumbling protest as the stragglers in the audience rush to sit down, treading on some limbs as they go.

After a minute the lights go out everywhere in the common room save for above the cleared stage area, and everyone quiets down at once. Trini smiles, noting a group of first-years sitting on another beanbag next to them in the dark, all looking excited but slightly confused. 

A light classical music starts to play as one of the other _Readers_ , an upper-year boy built like a troll, walks out onto the curtained stage. He seems to be wearing a juror's wig, his entire face is painted green, and a piece of parchment with 'BILL THE LIZARD' written on it in bold messy letters is Spellotaped to his chest.

Looking out at them all, he gestures to the room happily with a tattered book in hand. "Puff Players presents: _Alice's Adventures in Wonderland_ , Part Two," he announces, then walks off.

There's a pause before the curtain is jerked back to reveal a bare bones setup: three people—Dustin and two girls—grouped around a tiny table in ridiculous costumes, crammed together on two rickety chairs and nearly on top of each other. A cast iron kettle sits on the table with three of the yellow plastic cups that they all use for drinking games at House parties.

" _Chapter Seven: A Mad Tea Party_ ," comes the boy's voice again from beside the stage. " _There was a table set out under a tree in front of the house, and the March Hare and the Hatter were having tea at it_ ," he reads, voice magically magnified just enough to carry comfortably through the room. " _A Dormouse was sitting between them, fast asleep, and the other two were using it as a cushion, resting their elbows on it, and talking over its head_."

Another of the _Readers_ —Wayne Hopkins, a boy in Trini's year—steps onto the stage from the back then, arriving in a way that she can only describe as prancing. He's wearing the same getup as last week: a long fraying blonde wig and a pale blue dress, which is a solid few sizes too small for him.

Bringing his own copy of the book up to his nose, he reads as he steps up to the table. "' _Very uncomfortable for the Dormouse,_ ' _thought Alice_ ;" he says, going between a high-pitched voice for Alice and a low one for narration, "' _only, as it's asleep, I suppose it doesn't mind._ '" 

The _Readers_ make their way through the story with an attentive audience, all snacking and enjoying each other's company, until Alice is set to meet the King and Queen of Hearts and they all freeze in place.

The boy narrating the play comes out onto the stage with a twinkle in his eye then, using his wand to direct the tattered curtain to follow him and block the stage from view again. "House-mates, I have the absolute pleasure of introducing our guest _Reader_ , playing the Queen of Hearts—" he pauses for effect, then spells the curtain back once more, "HEAD OF HUFFLEPUFF HOUSE: PROFESSOR SPROUT!"

The room explodes in applause, all cheers and loud wolf-whistles as Professor Sprout comes into view, wearing a shiny black cloak with moving pictures of playing cards all over it and holding one of the tall rusty shovels from the greenhouses as a royal sceptre. And Trini beams, watching the bushy-tailed first year's gaze at up at the stage in surprise with big smiles and wide eyes.

As per tradition, Sprout guest stars annually in the first _Reading Room_ story of the school year. When she wasn't present last week everyone was confused, but given it was only part one of the book, they'd assumed that they would see her tonight.

The new kids hadn't known she would be here, though.

Reprising his role from last week as the Duchess, Cedric Diggory comes to the front of the stage in a puffy-shouldered, red velvet dress and gestures for everyone to quiet down, grinning like an idiot. After that the story starts up again with enthusiasm, and Professor Sprout's take on the Queen has everyone in stitches.

In four more chapters it's done, and the _Readers_ all take a bow to a fervent applause. The lights go back up gradually, leaving everyone sitting there basking in the happy energy for a few minutes before struggling to their feet, shaking pins and needles out from their legs and cleaning up their rubbish.

Some nights it's like this—where there are silly costumes and some semblance of props present—but others it's just a few _Readers_ gathered on the stage, reading a book out loud like a bedtime story. It's always a good time regardless of how much energy is in the air, because no matter how extravagant they make it that week, the vast majority of the House is _always_ there.

And it's been a bit different every year in how the whole thing runs, but never overly organised or uptight. At its most basic it's a bunch of kids reading a story out loud to their Housemates, with everyone experiencing it together and getting lost in another world for a couple hours.

Trini helped out a whole bunch of times last year, much preferring to be behind the scenes. On occasion she'll read as a stand-in if they need it, but being on stage isn't really her thing. Playing in Quidditch matches in front of the _entire_ school three times a year drains her enough to require multiple months of recuperation; she prefers to lay low when she can.

She follows Summer, Gia, and Chip back into their dormitory, chatting with a few people here and there as they go. Once they've shut the door she yawns wildly, feeling exhausted, and moves to start getting ready for bed.

.

The following morning, Trini finishes up her regular yoga routine and makes her way back down through the castle, trailing a hand along a stair bannister or two as she goes, feeling light.

Once she's made it back to her dorm she putters about, showering and tiptoeing around the room. Stops at her bookshelf, about to put an album on and settle in to read some comics for a couple hours before their pick-up game—scheduled for earlier than usual today—when her stomach gives an unexpected growl.

Trini hums, frowns, looking to where the box of granola bars usually sits in the top corner of her shelf, only to find an empty space. Because, that's right, she finished the last one a few days ago.

She sighs, grabbing her towel and untwisting it from where it was wrapped around her head. After drying her hair a little more she brushes it quickly and shakes it out. Pulls on her holster again and picks up her wand, waving it and muttering to send her towel soaring into the bathroom where it hangs itself up neatly.

Over to her wardrobe she goes, pulling on a pair of soft grey joggers and a navy hoodie, yawning. Slippers next, then Trini's walking out of her dorm with Sabre on her heels.

When she exits the common room and comes into the warmly-lit basement corridor outside, Sabre's sitting there waiting already, having used some kind of cat passage. Gives a little _meow_ before falling into step beside her, and Trini smiles.

Because the cats that live in the castle certainly prowl about, but Sabre tends to only visit Trini in the comfort of the common room or her dorm. There are exceptions of course—one of which is early mornings like these where there are little to no students awake yet. Sabre often elects to accompany her around, tagging along before she inevitably disappears with a swish of her tail, off to other exciting pursuits.

Trini certainly enjoys the company, and she sweeps down to run her hand along Sabre's thick fur fondly as the two of them walk the length of the corridor, making for the Great Hall. Preferring not to bother the house elves this early, given the kitchens resemble something like the aftermath of a tornado in the couple hours both leading up to and in the wake of every meal.

They emerge out of the staircase and into the cavernous Entrance Hall to find it empty, making their way to the left and into the brighter Great Hall, where the dawning light of the morning reflects in the enchanted ceiling above. And Trini's immediately met with a surprise in the form of Kim, sitting near the centre of the Slytherin table alone, reading a book and sipping at a steaming mug.

The place is almost entirely empty, as it always is at this time of morning, with one, two, _Kim_... fourteen people in total scattered about. As is typical Professor McGonagall is sat at the staff table; Trini's only ever beat her here a handful of times in all of her years at Hogwarts.

 _Focus_.

And Trini is doing an admirable attempt at thinking quickly considering how achingly slow her brain seems to be working—clearly upset at being asked to do _anything_ at all this early—and she can't really blame it. Because she's stopped walking just past the Slytherin table, at Kim's back now and safely outside range of her peripherals, not sure if she should go say hello, or—

But Sabre seems to have her _own_ idea, already halfway to Kim.

_What the…?_

They've never even met before. What is she doing?

Trini blinks a few times then lurches in their direction, mumbling under her breath in Spanish about the _audacity_ of her demon cat while trying internally to compose herself to little success, her sleepy mind stalled on noting that she's certainly looked better than she does right now, what with the damp, tousled hair and baggy lounge clothes.

Sabre brushes her tail against Kim's leg and Trini frowns, given her cat is not the type to even _approach_ strangers, for one, and certainly not so warmly if she does.

At the sensation Kim starts a bit, looking down before her face softens. "Hi love," she coos, low voice carrying through the empty space between them that Trini's quickly closing, "up early again, are we?"

Trini resists the urge to furrow her brow and huffs, seeing Sabre now winding around Kim's legs like a needy idiot.

_Breaking news: aloof cat decides to cuddle up to pretty girl. Local idiot lightly panics. Stay tuned for updates._

"Sorry," Trini says, and Kim's head turns, eyebrows raising a bit in surprise. Apparently too absorbed in the moment to notice Trini approaching, which seems to be a building trend.

Her hearing _really_ could be better.

"About?" Kim replies, looking at her with a curious expression.

Trini gestures to Sabre with a half-arsed flick of her wrist. "That."

Kim peers down at Sabre then back up to Trini, a soft smile dawning on her face. "This one's yours?"

"I would say something along the lines of, 'Couldn't you tell by her arsehole demeanour', but she seems to like you."

There's a playful light in Kim's eyes as she regards Trini for a moment. "Do you want to sit with me? Or is this strictly a chase mission?"

The question is simple but there's _something_ in Kim's voice, her eyes—like always—that throws Trini, that slaps her awake better than any amount of coffee ever could. And with her brain spluttering like a bad engine, she wonders for a split-second if Kim meant to insert a double meaning there—playfully suggesting that Trini's figuratively chasing _her_ instead of literally chasing Sabre; slyly asking if Trini's even interested in sitting, talking, getting to know each other a bit better, or if her intentions are purely one-off, superficial, a chase and nothing else—

Wait.

Is Kim _flirting_ with her?

As soon as the ridiculous thought crosses her mind she swats it away, frustrated with herself.

_Get a grip. Jesus._

"Er, no," Trini replies, then hastens to clarify, "I mean, yeah, I'll sit. No to the chase mission. She goes wherever she pleases." She gestures weakly to Sabre. "I stopped trying to get her to do what I wanted a long time ago."

Kim looks back down at Sabre, scratching behind her ears, now. "Mmm. She's quite the character."

Trini nods. "I know when I'm out of my depth."

"Do you?"

There's a smirk playing at Kim's mouth, eyebrow quirked as if in challenge. But there's also something else flashing in her eyes _again_ that acts like a Pavlovian command for Trini's stomach to somersault.

Blinking a few times, Trini decides she doesn't know what to say to that, presently feeling like her brain has packed up and gone on holiday in some kind of lack-of-coffee strike, leaving nothing behind in its wake except a _single_ bumblebee.

Yep. Just buzzing in her head, now, where there should be coherent thoughts forming.

So she sits next to Kim, trusting her body to perform better than her mind, carefully picking her feet up to slide them between the bench and table. Leaving what she hopes is a comfortable amount of space—a foot or so of bench—between them.

"Nice slippers," Kim mutters, and Trini closes her eyes slowly, mortified.

Her slippers, her slippers. In the shape of tiger paws.

_News update: Local idiot, Trini, has been cancelled. Thank you for your interest._

Her eyes lock on the jug of ice-cold pumpkin juice on the table, actively wondering if it holds enough liquid to drown herself in, right here, right now—

"I've some like that too back home. Not the same, but... similar," Kim offers, jerking her head in the direction of the slippers, grinning. There's still a barely held back note of mirth in her voice, and Trini takes the opportunity to twist her torso to face her defiantly, looking Kim right in the eyes.

"They're comfortable, okay?" she says, voice coming out with a whine present underneath, like an unexpected, below-deck stowaway on what is _usually_ a very solid, sturdy ship.

She holds Kim's gaze, daring her to make fun of them again, and Kim raises her hands in surrender a moment later. Laughs, then—a melodic sound that flutters out, vibrant, alive, into the quiet between them. "Easy there, _tiger_. I like them."

Trini groans, leaning forward to rest her head on her hand, squishing one side of her face dramatically and staring blankly at the stone wall across from them. "If I knew I was gonna be subjected to this—" she gestures with a limp wrist in Kim's direction, "I would've preferred to die hungry in my dorm."

Another little laugh. "Okay, okay," Kim mutters, relenting. Pauses, then adds, "But can you blame me? You're so easy to tease."

Trini shrugs, pressing her lips together, but a small smile breaks through anyway.

Kim seems to accept this as a win, taking a long pull of her coffee. "Do you often wake up this early?" she asks, properly offering a truce, which Trini gratefully accepts.

And with all the teasing and joking they've been doing—at her own expense, to be sure—Trini finds that her response comes easier than expected, "Yeah. I'm not a morning person, really, but I like the quiet."

"There's something about it, eh?" Kim mutters, nodding like she understands. "I love this place when everyone's asleep."

An easy pause, then, and Trini can't help feeling a bit curious. Still warmer, more willing to talk. "Do you love it when they're awake?" she finds herself asking, and quietly; the question passing her lips before she gave it permission to leave her mouth.

But Kim hums, not fazed, lips parting just barely. Holding, considering her answer. "This is my favourite place on earth," she says softly, like she's sharing a secret. "I guess it's just easy when there's nobody around."

It's not exactly an answer, but Trini thinks she might get her meaning perfectly. She nods slowly, and Kim turns her head to give a soft smile, genuine warmth in her eyes as she meets Trini's gaze.

And Trini isn't sure if she's just more... susceptible? to Kim because of the Gay Thing, like an inborn vulnerability, but she has absolutely _no_ concept of how much time passes before she turns her head a little—feeling like she has to _physically move her body_ to break eye contact—with the intent to grab the handle of the coffee pot that sits on the table a bit to their right. More to stop herself from continuing to stare than anything, to find something else to focus on, to use the caffeine to get that insistent buzzing (much louder, now) out of her ears.

She immediately realises her error: it's necessary to lean across the space of Neutral Bench that separates them. But Trini's committed to it now, already moving, and her right arm, the navy material of the oversized hoodie—her dad's, soft and faded, too big, baggier than she accounts for—brushes against Kim's left as she stretches a little to reach the coffee pot.

Something like a firework shoots through Trini's body from the spot the two of them touch, freefalling to a place somewhere in the pit of her stomach and exploding—crackling tendrils of lightning travelling, sparking through her bloodstream, nerves, bones. And she pushes through it, keeping to smooth movements, grabbing the coffee pot handle and bringing it back, retreating to the safety of her side of the gap of bench between them, though it seems to have shrunk, slightly.

Closer, they're closer.

Trini starts to pour a cup for herself, wondering how long it's been since Kim spoke. Feeling like she's come out of the cinema and back into real time, disoriented, not sure if it's day or night outside.

A mug slides into her field of vision—which still seems strangely narrowed—and she turns her head to look at Kim again, who's looking back at her, smiling softly with something indecipherable in her eyes.

Silently asking for Trini to fill it. Mostly empty, now.

Trini inclines her head and does, leaving a bit of space at the top, not sure if Kim takes milk in her coffee or not.

"Thanks," Kim breathes. She puts the cup to her lips, blows on it, barely visible steam chased away for a beat before she takes a sip. Prefers it black, apparently.

Trini _certainly_ does not, reaching for both the sugar and milk and adding a teaspoon of the former before pouring the milk in, watching it carefully as the two liquids refuse to blend together for a moment—black and white dancing, spinning around one another—before relenting, combining, the colour turning to something more like a caramel.

Satisfied, Trini sips at it happily, rich warmth flowing down her throat. She takes a sweet roll from the basket on the table with her free hand as a soft _meow_ reaches her ears, and she twists around to see her cat on the floor behind the two of them.

"Hey bun," she says softly, forgetting to play cool with Kim beside her. Feeling strangely at ease, like they're present on a softer, safer plane at the moment.

Trini holds her hand out above Sabre's head, who hops up a little, standing on her back legs to headbutt her palm affectionately. And as soon as Kim mirrors her position, twisting around to grip the outside of the bench, watching them with soft eyes, Sabre turns and brushes her tail across Kim's fingers in greeting.

"Hi to you too," Kim breathes, reaching her hand down slowly, tentatively, to run a hand over Sabre's back. 

Sabre leans into her touch, and Trini finds herself frowning again.

"She really does like you," she murmurs, puzzled now that she can think a bit better on account of the coffee. Because Sabre rarely lets _anyone_ but Trini touch her, and if she does feel so inclined, it's not for very long.

"I don't blame her," Kim chimes, tipping her head to grin at Trini, that easy charm brightening again in her eyes. "But we're familiar—we tend to run into each other. Or, she finds me."

"Really?" Trini asks, properly curious.

Kim nods. "Yeah. Since..." she pauses, considering. "When did we meet?" she asks, looking down at Sabre as if expecting an answer.

Trini tilts her head. "Before this month?"

"Mmm. Sometime last spring," Kim says slowly, continuing to stare at Sabre. When she looks back up at Trini, her eyes are still soft, but there's something behind them that's unreadable, a locked door. "After we met."

The memory flashes in Trini's mind, just once: the smell of freshly mown grass, a cool spring breeze against her face. A girl in front of her, long dark hair pulled back into a ponytail, looking as windswept as Trini felt. A feeling of being pulled forward, inexplicably.

And it feels like so long ago. Because, god, she's actually _talking_ to that girl right now.

Kim. Who seems older, hair shorter; a different glint in her eyes most days, though she still looks at Trini the same.

"Huh," Trini says.

Kim shrugs like she's trying to get something off her back discreetly. "She's really great. I've just been calling her 'cat,'" she smirks, "which I can tell she does _not_ like."

Trini smiles. "Her name is Sabre."

Kim seems to consider this. "Sabre..." she mutters, like she's trying out how it sounds. As soon as she does, Sabre _really_ leans into her hand, nuzzling against her palm gently.

And Kneazles are incredibly intelligent, being not just a cat but a magical one—protective, uncannily able to sense untrustworthy or rubbish people, and all-around more perceptive and understanding than what would be expected of an animal. Watching Kim interact with Sabre, Trini gets the distinct impression that she has past experience with Kneazles. They can be properly tricky arseholes if you don't know what you're doing.

"Okay, so no more of the _name-that-shall-not-be-named_ ," Kim says lightly, giving Sabre a goofy look. "I'll be very happy to not be on the receiving end of your death glares in the future." She cranes her head up to look at Trini and squints playfully, the teasing lilt returning to her voice, "Ah wait, I _think_ I see the resemblance now."

"Hah, hah," Trini mutters, rolling her eyes.

Kim just grins back at her before informing Sabre that she's going to eat, now, receiving another head bop to her hand in acknowledgement. With that, she pushes back up to sit properly and begins dishing some scrambled eggs onto her plate. "It's... really cool that she's yours, actually. I've been wondering about her owner for ages."

"Well, Sabre's never introduced me to any of her friends before," Trini returns, smirking. Feeling like the biggest dork but not finding it in herself to give a damn at the moment.

Kim laughs sincerely at that, though, and any hesitation Trini had at making silly comments vanishes.

"I'm honoured," Kim says, still smiling.

Trini hums, copying Kim by serving herself some eggs and a few pieces of bacon. "You should be, but you're also really good with her. You must have pets, no? Wild guess: a Kneazle?"

"Two. And others..." Kim replies, smiling as her hand comes up to her throat to run a finger along her chunky choker necklace absentmindedly. "My family's always been big on animals."

"Mine too, but non-magical ones."

"Oh?"

"Dad's muggle-born and he raised the three of us, mostly," Trini explains, shrugging. "Me and my younger brothers. A lot of hiking, national parks, that kind of thing."

Kim nods, taking a moment to swallow the forkful of eggs in her mouth. "My grandparents live in a national park not far from here. They're Magizoologists, actually."

Trini's eyebrows shoot up, turning to look at Kim with an excitement stirring in her chest that makes her feel like a little kid, though she thinks she succeeds in keeping most of it off of her face. "That's so cool. I want to be a Magizoologist when I'm older, I think."

"They love it," Kim says, smiling. "If you ever want to talk to them about it, let me know."

And the offer's clearly genuine—Trini's come to realise that Kim really isn't the type to say something unless she means it. At least in quiet moments like this.

"Thanks, Kim."

"Of course."

They chat as they eat, minutes stretching easily, falling into comfortable silence here and there. A couple handfuls of early-riser students trickle into the Great Hall, passing them on their left, but it still feels like they have the place to themselves.

"So..." Kim says some time later, poking Trini's slipper with her own under the table and clearly trying to suppress a smirk. Failing miserably. "I _have_ to ask: is Sabre short for Sabretooth _Tiger_ , or?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'superposition' by young the giant. and the quotes the readers recite during reading room are directly from my copy of lewis carroll's [alice's adventures in wonderland](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alice%27s_Adventures_in_Wonderland)!
> 
> \---
> 
> SO! HELLO! sabre is the captain of the trimberly ship, apparently! and kim knows her, somehow??? that will be explained in time.
> 
> hope you enjoyed the little glimpse of what it's like to be in hufflepuff house. more to come, so bear with me as we build this whole world out further. (WHILE STAYING CANON COMPLIANT, MY DUDES!)
> 
> as for trini and kim meeting in the morning, it was bound to happen. mind, trini isn't usually one to go up to breakfast on her own unless she has a reason for it—preferring to be with her roommates or housemates because she enjoys the company—whereas kim can be found almost _anywhere_ but her dorm/common room at any given time of day, often alone. 
> 
> also note that kim's likely been up for hours already, while trini is still half asleep post yoga. so if you noticed trini's internal narration being a bit ????? here and there, that was intentional—she is both groggy AND trying to deal with her brain constantly short-circuiting due to unexpected kim proximity. 
> 
> because! as our token Oblivious Gay who is _also_ a very observant person by nature (which has been really fun to play with so far), trini is an EXPERT in Gay Denial. to muddle everything up further, she certainly knows kim's beautiful, yes, but she doesn't have much personal experience with feeling attraction, per se. she's a big mess but is trying her best.
> 
> kim though? with the flirting? she is awake, has already been out swimming, has had THREE coffees, and knows EXACTLY what she's doing. 
> 
> so yes! friendly reminder, again, that this is a slow burn. BUT AS PER THE CHAPTER TITLE TRACK! there is clear chemistry there and you're gonna see it beCAUSE IF I HAVE TO THEN SO DO YOU! time will tell how it develops, and these kids still have entire lives outside of each other. we will get there though, so hold on to your hats!!!
> 
> thank you all for reading. as always, I am unashamed to say that comments are LOVELY and FUEL ME but if that's not your thing that is also super dope. I'm beyond thrilled that you guys, gals, and nonbinary pals are coming on this trip with me, and the fact that people are enjoying this story sparks a LOT of joy. you all are wonderful, thanks for coming by, and until next time!


	12. Forever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***NOTE: trigger warning for passing mention of panic attacks & suicidal ideation.
> 
> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/1tDVgmIzvqIpgilWP3tc69?si=-kJG0T62Q_Gf1VjxavdxgA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The end of September arrives in a crisp fashion, chillier in the mornings but not unpleasant, bringing with it the promise of autumn weather—Trini's favourite.

It's certainly still warm for the moment, though, and Wednesday free period finds her outside in the grounds, sitting underneath the ancient beech tree near the lake with Zack, Billy, Kim, and Jason.

And Trini's not entirely sure what this is—the five of them hanging out on their shared free period for the past few weeks, now for the third time in a row—but she doesn't mind it. She spends the vast majority of her time with her roommates and the Quidditch team otherwise, so it's not like she's snubbing her other friends or anything.

But she's never quite gravitated towards a group of people the way she has (and continues to) with this lot. Like they've all been pulled into the same orbit at once, suddenly on the same trajectory despite originating from different parts of the universe.

Celestial mumbo jumbo aside, though, she meant what she said to Zack a few weeks ago about taking it slow with Kim and Jason specifically. She finds making friends difficult—always has—and the ever-present paranoia of sharing too much of herself, enough to be considered 'weird' by Cool Kid Standards, doesn't aid in the process.

Besides her roommates and the Quidditch team (who she knows technically aren't obligated to like her, but it doesn't stop that little voice in her head sometimes, muttering that they're only putting up with her because they have to) Jason and Kim are the two most conventionally 'Cool' people she's ever come close to befriending. And Trini's own inclusion on the House team apparently grants her what is referred to at Hogwarts as 'Squad Appeal', which she knows puts her in a better-off tier than most when it comes to automatic popularity points. But Kim and Jason are on another level just based on who they _are_ , looking like they could walk onto the set for a reboot of _The Breakfast Club_ and play the roles of the popular kids without batting an eye.

Trini can't knock them for that, exactly, but it makes her more wary of them than is probably necessary. And she has the Tough Kid Of Few Words thing going for her, an identity that has been meticulously crafted very, very intentionally over her last three years at Hogwarts. But internally, and as much as she hates herself for it, she's just as worried as any other kid would be about not being _enough_ ; always fretting about not saying the right thing, looking the right way, or acting the part, though she'll never show it.

But she's trying. Clicking with Kim and Jason has been amazing, and if she's able to get a good enough read on the both of them to maybe start to open up a little, it would be brilliant.

Presently, they're all out in the grounds — Billy looked outside not a minute after her and Kim arrived in the library post Ancient Runes and suggested it, to enthusiastic agreement from all sides.

Billy sits with his back up against the enormous beech tree trunk now, homework in his lap, with Jason and Kim sprawled out on the ground a few feet away, all three sheltered by the shade cast under the tree's massive canopy.

Trini and Zack both elected to stay in the sun. And with an array of books and parchment spread out in the lush grass in front of her, she's presently experiencing the satisfying feeling of a tough concept coming together in her mind. She loves moments like this—that little click where what was foggy is made clear. Her Arithmancy homework is the cause, and she flops backwards into the grass dramatically, smiling up at the sky.

"I see your nerd glow, T."

"Let me have this!" she huffs, shooting a glare at Zack. And it was certainly difficult—she quite literally made a note in the page margins that says, ' _this was hard'_.

A small way of validating herself now that she's grasped it. It's the little things.

"I'll bugger off if you explain it to me."

Trini rolls her eyes and an unimpressed look crosses her face before Zack tips to the side and lays down in the grass beside her, wearing a toothy smile.

"Do you have food to offer as payment?" she asks, not humouring him by looking his way at all. She continues staring up at the clouds—imagining the swipe of a giant's hand, tips of huge fingers painted white and streaking across a bright blue canvas. Finding herself itching to paint, wishing she had her supplies with her at school. She never brings them, because who has that kind of time, anyway?

"Erm," Zack starts, then sits up, squinting in the sunlight. "Yo Jase, can you check my rucksack for those crisps?" he asks, looking to where Jason and Kim are both laying a few feet away—Kim with her head resting on his stomach, dozing, and Jason using his tattered messenger bag as a pillow, one arm curled behind his head for more of a cushion. He's doing class readings, levitating his History of Magic textbook above his face in a manner that's either very brave or decidedly stupid.

Jason grabs the floating book with one hand and makes to reach a few feet away to Zack's bag—looking worried about moving too much as to not wake Kim, gazing down at her like she's a sleeping puppy—when Billy covers his hand with his own. "I've got it, Jason," he says quietly.

Billy bends forward, brings the rucksack towards him and looks up. "Zack, can I check your bag instead?" he asks, voice still quiet, also clearly trying not to wake Kim. "I'm closer."

Zack smiles. "Yeah mate, of course. Thank you."

"No problem," Billy says, now poking through the bag. "There's a packet of crisps here, yes, and some licorice wands. Do you want those?"

"Please," Zack replies, and Billy sends them all floating over. Trini shades her eyes with her hand, looking up at Zack happily as he plucks them out of the air.

"One licorice wand will suffice," she chirps.

Zack deposits it in her hand with a flourish. "Cool. Though I know that you would've helped for free. You can't fool me."

Trini scoffs. "Just get your stuff."

He does, and the two of them get to work on it.

.

Trini walks into the Owlery the next morning and pulls the sleeves of her hoodie down over her hands. It's chilly and she hasn't got her coffee yet, but she's been meaning to send this letter to her dad for a couple days.

She's surprised to see another person as soon as she walks in: wearing a light grey hoodie that's a bit tighter than he usually would seem to prefer—short in the sleeves, like he's had a growth spurt recently—golden brown hair mussed from sleep, and holding a parcel in hand with his back turned to her.

Jason turns around at hearing the door close and looks at her blankly for a fraction of a moment before smiling, eyes crinkling at the sides. "Hey, Trini."

Trini responds with an upward jerk of her head, moving to look up at the wall with hundreds of perches going up to the tower ceiling, half-filled with owls who are snacking away happily on their breakfast mouse. She squints, looking for one that's finished eating, and raises her hand up in the air for one to come down. Smiles at Jason. "How's your morning?"

"Decent," he replies, now attaching his parcel to the leg of a barn owl. "It's my little sister's birthday today, so I'm hoping this will be there soon after she gets back home from school."

Trini smiles. "Cool. How old is she?"

"Eight today." He grins and shakes his head, emitting a little laugh as a quick breath out through his nose. "I reckon this sounds stupid, but it kind of amazes me every time I see her now. She's growing up so quickly."

"My twin brothers are eight this year too," Trini offers, as a large tawny owl comes swooping down to land on her forearm. It hoots at her in greeting and she whispers a hello at it, bringing it over to one of the little worn writing tables and letting it hop down. "I get that—I remember the first time I heard one of them say something that was like... adult-sounding, I was kind of dumbfounded for a moment."

"Same age, eh?" Jason says, bringing his owl over to one of the tall glassless windows and sticking his arm out slowly. It takes off, and he watches it go out into the overcast morning with a small smile. "Yeah, she's a good kid. So pure of heart."

"So she'll be a Hufflepuff, then," Trini chimes, grinning. She finishes attaching her letter to her owl's leg, double-checks the address, and brings it over to the window beside Jason.

Jason barks out a laugh. "Hah, no."

"We'd love to have her," Trini teases, as her owl lifts off her arm with another hoot in goodbye. The breeze plays with her hair as the both of them watch it go, and she turns to him with a twinkle in her eye.

"Uh huh," he says, turning to walk out of the Owlery and glancing at her in silent question to follow. She does, and they begin to descend the spiral staircase out of the tower together. "You know what's right awful though? She doesn't even _want_ to be in Gryffindor like me! She wants to be in Slytherin!"

Trini whistles lowly. "Betrayal in the Scott clan."

He chuckles. "It's all Kim and Tommy, honestly. Pearl's always thought they were cooler than me."

"Well, they _are_."

Jason cranes his head around to look at her proper as they come to the door out of the staircase, pouting. "How can you say that! You don't even know Tommy, do you?"

"I've heard enough about her to make the call. Can't fault the truth, Wonderboy."

He gives her a disgruntled hum paired with a small smile. Rolls his eyes. "I should've joined the Quidditch team. I bet she'd think I was cool then."

"You know, I could actually see that," Trini mutters, turning with him to make their way to the Grand Staircase. They seem to have wordlessly agreed to go down to breakfast together. "If you don't mind me asking — why didn't you? You have a natural knack for it, from what I've seen."

Jason shrugs. "I've always loved playing as a fun thing. Not that it isn't fun when you're competing, but I much prefer being the fan to being the player." He pauses for a moment, frowns. "My dad was really good in his time—Captain of the Gryffindor team and everything. When I told him I wasn't going to play he was disappointed, but I didn't want to do it just because he wanted me to, you know?"

"Don't like being told what to do, then?" Trini asks, and though her voice is teasing, it's a bit softer.

"Nah," he answers, smiling. "Prefer to do my own thing. He said he thought I was being unreasonable, side-stepping a cool opportunity, but I've been playing Quidditch my whole life casually and never once wanted to play organised."

"That's cool of you, knowing yourself at that early an age," Trini says, turning her body a little as they weave by a group of Ravenclaws. "My dad's always been my idol—if he wanted me to play, I probably would've tried it just on that alone."

Jason nods. "I thought about it. And it _really_ isn't a big deal, or at least it wouldn't be in most cases, but he played pro too, right—"

Trini can't help herself. "What! Mate, that's so cool!"

Jason beams. "Yeah. Started on the Arrows then moved to the Magpies for the last two years of his career. Played for… seven? years or so, then quit when my mum had me."

"Wow. What a dad," Trini says, grinning.

"He did the stay-at-home thing," Jason says, shrugging. "My mum's an Obliviator with the Ministry so she worked, and he decided not to go back to Quidditch after a few years of being off; in the end, he got a job at the Ministry too. Works with mainly aquatic magical life—going out on boats and stuff liaising with Merpeople colonies, evaluating areas where muggles have come into contact with magical water creatures, that kind of deal."

Trini nods. "That's really cool." And she means it—she's never met an Obliviator before, only seen a few of them running around at the Quidditch World Cup in the summer. And working with magical creatures in any capacity is kind of her dream job.

"He'd always wanted to do that, really," Jason says, as the two of them come to the marble staircase landing and start to descend into the Entrance Hall. "That was his focus in school—took Creatures all the way through to N.E.W.T., same with Herbology and all that jazz."

He pauses when they come into the Great Hall, which is decently populated given they have around an hour until school starts. They aim for the end of the Hufflepuff table, with Jason looking around a bit apprehensively as they arrive.

Trini sees this and laughs. "They aren't going to tar and feather you, don't worry."

Jason smiles and shakes his head, plopping down on the bench, grabbing the pot of coffee in front of him and pouring the both of them a cup. They don't have much time to spare, so they both start eating immediately.

"What I was saying with all of that," he continues, as Trini stirs her milk and sugar into her coffee, "was that he was putting... more pressure on me to play Quidditch than I liked. And if he was already doing that before I even _started_ , it likely would have been way worse if I actually decided to play."

Trini nods, eyes warm at him sharing this with her, and he hums. "And I get where he was coming from—he's my dad and he wants me to have the best possible experiences in life, right? But after being weirdly icy with me for awhile about my decision not to play, I think he grew to respect me more for doing my own thing."

He pauses, tipping his head to the side a little. "He apologised to me earlier this year, actually. Saying that he was proud of me and that he was sorry for being an arse back then. Bought an old beat-up automobile as a weird, very _dad_ kind of peace offering and asked if I wanted to learn how to fix it up with him."

"That's really great," Trini says, smiling. "Him admitting he messed up and trying to make it right. And that's a cool way to bond. I love cars—my dad owns an auto garage."

Jason's eyebrows shoot up. "Oh man, that's brilliant!"

Trini nods, biting into a piece of toast with jam and chewing for a moment before she grabs a satsuma from a bowl and pockets it for later. "We've had a few projects like that over the years, where we fix up an old beater and make it look like something out of a vintage car catalogue. Never kept them, though—my dad's always sold them as a side source of income."

"I guess if you have the skill, right?" Jason says, still seemingly very interested in their topic of conversation. She can practically feel him wanting to ask her a million questions.

Trini smiles. "Yeah. It was a great way to get to know each other better, and he'd always buy a little gift for me at the end of it as a kind of reward. We've only done it twice—it can take years per car, right, especially as something you're doing as a hobby—but if I ever have kids, I'd love to do that with them one day."

"If I ever get that good at it, I'd love to do that too," Jason says, tipping his head to the side a little.

"It's just practise, like anything," Trini assures him, letting out a little yawn. "If you keep at it I'm sure you'll be some brilliant magical car mechanic in no time."

Jason smiles wide. "I _love_ mechanics. I'm good with knick knacks already, but engines and such is the dream." He pauses, drumming his fingers on his coffee mug. "That's the goal, really." He looks down the table and notes how she's shifted in her seat a little. "Ready to go? I should probably get back to my dorm. I have to shower before lessons and McGonagall will hand me my arse if I'm late again."

"Yeah," Trini answers, getting up and grabbing another piece of toast for good measure. Jason stuffs a blueberry muffin into his mouth, turning to her and flashing a brilliant, silly smile that grows around it, and she shoves him lightly. They walk out together and she waves goodbye as he ascends the marble staircase, making her way down into the basement with a bit of a quicker pace than she usually would. Potions is _not_ a class that she can be tardy for.

.

"How are you doing, K?"

Kim looks up from _Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy_ to see Jason looking back at her, the concern on his face evident even in the cool afternoon shadows cast by the great beech tree they're sitting under; the worry in his voice heard over the early autumn breeze moving lightly through the grass around them.

She sighs and drops her book down to her lap, wedging her finger into it to mark the page and letting it close. "I should be asking you that, Jase. And I do, but you won't _talk_ to me."

And she's trying to divert him, of course, given she had another panic attack this morning—her second this week. Jason's trying to be a good friend, trying to talk about it with her. But he's treating her like she's made of glass, and she's tired of not hearing anything about his life despite her constantly making it known that she's here for him.

How can he expect her to start to open up to him again when he won't do the same?

Jason shakes his head. "No, don't flip this on me. How am I to start complaining about my life when you're having literal panic attacks all the time?"

And, yep, there it is. She _knows_ he didn't mean it badly but it stings a little, makes her feel weak. "You don't exist to worry about me, or to protect me. This has never been a one-way friendship, has it?" she mutters, surprised at how her own voice is abrupt and clipped, stemming from the defensive tension now coiling in her every muscle. "I know we're learning all of the steps to this again, and I know that is _entirely_ on me, but you don't have to be extra worried or attentive for fear of me leaving you again if you don't—"

"Don't be an idiot," Jason interjects, frustrated, and she can _feel_ the pressure mounting between them all at once, a wall of water sloshing against a shoddy, creaking floodgate. Inevitable, they both knew, given they've been steering around talking directly about this. "My concern has no ulterior motive—"

"That's not what I meant—"

"But it's what you _think_ ," he says softly, sighing. His jaw flexes. "Sometimes I feel like you forget how well I know you."

There's a pause for a beat. Her voice gets even harder when she speaks again, grinding against the gentleness in his tone, "Nobody knows me anymore, Jason. Forgive the drama of that statement, but it's true. Nobody does—myself included."

She drops the book off her lap and into the dusty dirt, the page forgotten. Because who gives a fuck, honestly. "And I've really liked spending time with Trini and Zack because it's a fresh start, right? So there I am trying to look more approachable and shit so they won't think I'm awful right out the gate, but all of it is such a _fucking_ farce, because as soon as they find out what happened they're going to be _gone_. You need to be preparing for that—for what associating with me gets you—not being fucking kind to me."

Jason scoffs. "You're assuming so much without knowing anything at all, which is so unlike you," he says, aghast. He starts to count off on his fingers. "You're assuming Trini and Zack will run when you don't know shit about it, you're assuming that opening up to me and Tommy means that you're doing us some kind of... what? disservice? which is _so_ backward—"

"Piss off 'I don't know shit about it', _anyone_ would run—"

"You are still you and I still fucking know you," he says firmly, matching her in cursing and disregarding her comment. Makes a point of looking into her eyes. "You're still the same person. And I know the reality of that might be even scarier than believing that you're different..." Kim swallows thickly, staring him down, jaw clenching over and over, "because you don't want to believe that you—the _same_ person you were years and years ago—could do the horrible things you've done. But you _are_ that person: past, present, and future. You are _all_ of them—"

She starts to open her mouth and he holds up his hand, voice rising in volume a notch, "And it's _because_ I know you that I'm trying to pull you back and help you traverse this. There's a haze in your mind that is going to take some time to clear, and you can't guide yourself out of it alone. Not when you can't see the way."

He takes a breath, looking at her with something like pleading in his eyes. "We've done this dance before."

Kim shakes her head, voice rushing out, defiant, "I may not be able to get out of it alone, but I don't want you in that grimy, cold, suffocating place with me. Stop giving me the benefit of the doubt when I deserve _none_ of that from you—"

"Could you can it with that crap for like, thirty seconds?" Jason exclaims, exasperated, voice cracking a little. "Tommy and I forgave you that night on the pitch when you apologised. You'll _always_ have the benefit of the doubt with us because we're your best friends. That's the end of it, so stop pushing me away—" his voice wobbles, falters, "when I'm right _here_ —"

Her breath hitches. "Jase, you're here and I love you but that doesn't mean I'm going to bring you further into this than you have to be—"

"You don't think I've been _in_ this from the first day we started talking again?" he interjects loudly, eyes alight, gleaming more than they were a moment ago. "No— the first day we ever sodding _met_? I've wanted to be beside you this entire time and you push me away _regardless_ of what I do! I've stepped back before because you insisted, and look where that got us!"

Kim stares, alarmed, as he shakes his head. Unshed tears shining in his eyes. "We've been there for each other _equally_ —you, me, and Tom—since we all learned to fucking speak," he says, enunciating, deliberate, his words like well-placed jabs, sounding more like he's trying to wake her up from something than to hurt her feelings. "And it was _you_ who started to pull away when everything went down with your parents."

When he takes a quick deep breath in she hears it catch, hears it shake. "Kim, we gave you space when you asked for it because we expected you to _come back to us_ —" his voice breaks, and it's like she's seeing him unravel where he sits, his regular calm demeanour replaced with something wilder, something more desperate; posture falling, curling in on himself. "And we tried, but it didn't take long for us to realise we was losing you. And once it became clear that space was not boding well at all, we tried to come to _you_ instead."

Jason gestures, a back-handed slap through the air, voice rushed, trying to get her to understand. "But that only pushed you further away! You kept doing exactly what you're doing right now—saying you didn't want to bring us into darkness with you."

His face falls then, and there's such profound disappointment there that it feels like all the air is gone from around them. "You left me. You left _Tommy_ , who was in the exact same boat as you, Kim. Her mum and your dad—both Death Eaters. You _both_ lost parents that day, but you got so wrapped up in it that it was like you forgot that she was going through the exact same thing."

Jason shakes his head, running a hand over his forehead roughly. "In the name of protecting us you left us. You tore yourself away and it broke us both." He pauses. Gestures, defeated, to her. "It broke you, too."

He falls silent abruptly, clearly trying to compose himself, but seems to soon realise it's useless. When he speaks again his voice resumes its previous track, rising in volume, inflating with his posture, "Don't you get by now that this whole bit _doesn't_ work? Every time you say stuff like this I hear your voice from that bloody day in the Owlery—"

Her breath hitches. "Jase—"

He barrels on though, too quick to be stopped, now, "...that day when you told me, after being together since the _day we were born_ , that you didn't want me around anymore. Just like that. You remember what you said?"

Kim stares at him, pale. She remembers every word of that conversation—it plays in her dreams, in her nightmares, in the back of her mind on bad days. One of her deepest, most profound regrets.

Jason's jaw clenches. "You fucking said: 'I won't bring you into this. You're not going to be able to take it, and I don't want you with me.'" He sounds congested, suddenly whispering to keep his voice steady, "How's that any different than what you're saying now? You've always been so black and white, Kim. And something you don't get—and something I'm starting to wonder if you'll _ever_ get—is that you can't do this alone. You're letting yourself flounder because you're being a sodding _idiot_ and won't take someone else's hand to help pull you out."

A pause, and then he's staring right at her, defiant, determined. "Merlin, I'm not dealing with this complex of yours anymore! You aren't allowed to keep setting yourself up for crap because you think that's what you are, or it's what you deserve. I've seen this bloody film before, and I don't buy any of it." He sighs, wiping at his eyes like he's frustrated with himself for being so emotional. "I lost you once because I listened to your idiot arse and backed away. I'm not making that mistake again. You're too fucking important to me."

And just like that he deflates proper, stopping his abrupt rising and falling, the swinging from blunt confrontation to quiet dejection. Looking exhausted.

Kim stares at him, completely baffled. He's never gone off on her like this before.

She waits a few moments before she goes to reach for him, then stops. Hesitates.

_No. Come on, you have to face this._

And she steels herself—timidly tipping forward, dirt from the roots of the tree scuffing up the knees of her trousers, and shuffles to sit directly in front of him, legs crossed. Doesn't touch him, timid. "None of what happened is on you, Jase," she says quietly, tipping her head to try to meet his eyes.

Jason just sits there, frozen, before he shakes his bowed head. Takes a shuddering breath in and lets it out. "You weren't in your right mind and I should've stepped up," he says softly, playing with the zipper on his Quidditch duffel. "If I had've been more stubborn, if I'd actually _fought_ for our fucking friendship, kept you from being so _stupid_ , none of this would've happened. You wouldn't be sitting here believing that you're undeserving of my love, or of anyone's."

She takes his hand gently, carefully, and he stares down at it for a moment before squeezing back once. "Kim, you came so _close_ to ending it," he whispers, so quietly that she barely hears, voice trembling. More soft than he's ever spoken to her, still not catching her eye.

"I know," she breathes, and they sit in silence for a minute.

She told him a few months ago. And he cried harder than she'd ever seen—her best friend in the world, learning just _how_ close she was to taking her own life.

He takes a shaky breath in and out. Calmer, now, but still cloudy, like a flash summer storm come and gone. "We've talked about all of this and I know that you _know_ what I'm saying is true," he says, sighing. "You're in a bad spot in your mind, I can see it. That's why I'm asking how you are."

"I'm sorry," she says quietly.

So many things she wishes she could take back.

Jason shakes his head, bringing her hand up to his lips and kissing it, finally looking at her with a kind of love in his eyes that she could never even begin to try and quantify. "You know _now_. I know now. And I'm not letting you do this alone, so please quit it, alright?"

Kim nods. She knows he's right.

She picks up _Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy_ from where it lays in the dirt, brushing the jacket off a little, finding her page again and putting her finger there. Marking her progress. "I'm not gonna promise you that I'm going to be any easier to deal with," she says then. Softly, plainly. "But I _swear_ to you I'm going to try."

"That's all I'm asking," he says, kissing the back of her hand again. He stares at the ground, eyes unfocused. "And I'm sorry too, for getting like this—"

"You don't have to be," she interjects quietly, putting a hand on his knee. "I'm glad you said something, and I want you to talk to me about anything—but _especially_ if I'm the source of what's bothering you."

Jason nods, humming. "And I'll try to." He waves his hand vaguely. "I know it isn't fair for me to expect you to talk then not do it myself."

And there he is, so much on her wavelength, always.

He pauses, still looking like he's lost in his own mind somewhere. "I just— it was supposed to be the three of us against the world, you know? And it's kind of all fucked now, with Tommy closer to other people. Guess I wonder if there's even room for us anymore. If she'd be better off..."

Kim shakes her head. "Before I threw a bomb into all of this, our friendship was the best thing about my life, Jase. And I know she felt the same."

He nods. "Me too."

Kim smiles softly. "It won't ever be the same as it was, because that's true of everything. But it'll be better, something that's grown with all three of us," she says, tone sure. "It's going to be a slow process, but we'll get her back properly. We will be whole again."

He sighs. "And that might include other people too..." he trails off, a small smile pulling at the side of his mouth.

"Billy is lovely," she says, sincere. Knowing. "He clicks with us, somehow."

Jason smiles properly. "He does. And..." he pauses, looking pensive. "You know, that ease with him—I feel it with Zack and Trini too. They feel like _us_." And the statement doesn't entirely make sense, but she knows exactly what he means. She felt it their first pick-up game together, and feels it still.

Kim nods, looking to where her broom is propped up against her Quidditch duffel. "I'm trying not to get too ahead of myself with those two. But they _do_ feel like us, and I can't quite find the right words to explain it beyond that."

"Just a feeling," Jason mutters, nodding too.

"Yeah."

He meets her eyes, and the affection still shining there sends a warm kind of buzz spreading through her whole body. "But I know you won't talk to anyone else about any of the stuff that's going on with you. Not yet at least," he says, voice gentle again. "Treat all of this as trauma, I've said that to you before. You're dealing with the fallout and you _need_ to talk to me about it, or to Tom."

And the tension truly leaves his shoulders, his neck, his voice. "So, new friends or not, Tom and I are gonna be there for you. You're going to _let_ us support you together." He smirks. "We'll be the best bra you've ever had."

Kim raises her eyebrow, pleasantly taken aback. "Your bi is showing."

His own eyebrows shoot up, eyes widening theatrically as he runs his hands over his front. "Wait, it is?" he says, faux-alarmed. "Bollocks, I've a bank robbery planned for later today. Is some nefarious entity disrupting my powers of invisibility?" He pops to his feet, drawing his wand and spinning around on the spot slowly like an idiot, stirring up a tiny cloud of dust that swirls, floats, settles. "VILLAIN! COME _OUT_ , I SAY! I JUST WANT TO TALK!"

"You're honestly something else. Why are we friends?" Kim asks, bewildered.

"We're friends because our powers magnify astronomically around each other," he explains in a posh accent, peering down at her as if speaking to a toddler. "A male and female bisexual _together_ is like, world-ending levels of invisibility."

"Bipocalypse," Kim chirps sagely, nodding.

He smiles at her, and properly. Plops down next to her again.

They sit in comfortable silence for a couple minutes before he speaks, all business, "Now, K. I _will_ talk to you about my life once you answer my original question: how are you?"

Kim looks back at him and sighs, acquiescing. And staring out over the sloping lawn of the grounds, she starts to talk about all of it—slowly, at first, then quicker.

Trusting him. Because underneath all of the swirling doubt in her mind, she _knows_ she can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'forever' by chvrches. (which is, for the record, one of the MOST kim & jason songs to ever exist. _please_ listen to it!)
> 
> speaking of kim and jason, HAPPY BISEXUAL VISIBILITY DAY (if you're reading this on the 23rd of September)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> \---
> 
> so yes! to business! we've done a tiny time jump since last chapter, about a week and a half or so. this one opens on a wednesday afternoon during the rangers shared free period before supper; for reference, kim sat next to trini in ancient runes exactly two weeks ago (and has been sitting with her in that class since then, which is LOVELY).
> 
> in regards to the kim/jason/tommy trio, we're starting to get an idea of what happened & just how badly kim hurt both herself and the people who love her. she was in a real dark place as a result, and all will be explained in time. 
> 
> the next chapter will open a few hours after the end of this one, right after their regular pick-up game. kim's past starts to catch up to her, biting at the heels of her new friendships, and trini gets a small glimpse of what she's running from.
> 
> ANYWAY! you will be getting two chapters on the next update. wahoo! and the kids are REALLY STARTING TO HANG OUT NOW! WE'VE GOT A GOOD FOUNDATION FORMING! THE STORY IS TAKING SHAPE AROUND THEM!
> 
> thanks for reading, all. appreciate you to the moon and back and I hope you had a lovely weekend. onwards we go!


	13. Please Just Take These Photos From My Hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/1Aaghfmt8pGitW02qlzo4E). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Later that evening, as they're all striding out of the pitch windswept and high on adrenaline, Trini notices one of her trainers is untied and kneels down to fix it. There are plenty of fun and colourful ways in which she could reasonably accept injuring herself on the Quidditch pitch, but tripping over her own shoelaces is not one of them.

Billy and Zack wait for her while Jason and Kim continue walking ahead towards the castle, chatting away, unaware that she stopped. And in typical idiot fashion, Zack begins leaning on the space between Trini's shoulder blades, essentially preventing her from getting up in any kind of dignified manner.

"Keep digging your elbow into me any longer, homeboy, and I'll jinx it to jelly right here and now."

He's familiar enough with her to know she's joking, but he backs off nevertheless. "Feisty," he teases, offering his hand to hoist her up. "Is this 'cause of that _amazing_ feint I pulled on you earlier? No hard feelings." 

Rolling her eyes, she takes it, and he pulls her to her feet with ease. She looks over at Billy, who's just standing there watching them quietly, rocking back and forth a bit on the balls of his feet.

"Thanks for waiting, lads."

Billy gives her a soft smile. "Of course, Trini."

"No child left behind," Zack says seriously, with a twinkle in his eye.

Trini shoves him, keeping her expression set to unimpressed. "I anxiously await new and exciting comedy material, Z."

Zack shrugs. "Height jokes are so classic, T." He pauses, smirking. "Not sure if I can ever _measure up_ to Kim on that, though. Girl's got a skilled tongue on her."

Trini groans at that, all the while feeling a heat creep up her cheeks that she hopes isn't noticeable. But with the flush already present from soaring through the chilly air for the last hour, she figures she should be good.

God, though. One mention of a pretty girl's tongue and she gets like this? Gay.

_Pull yourself together, Trini._

In an effort to brush it aside, she focuses her attention up ahead, to where Jason and Kim have just come to a stop. A group of four people blocks their path to the castle, and even from this far away, it's clear that the interaction is unusually tense.

On instinct Trini starts walking faster, just as Jason—who's usually so _steady_ in terms of how he asserts himself physically—lurches forward as if he's about to get into the space of one of the people standing in front of them. A Slytherin girl, by the looks of it. And, yeah—the other three grouped around her are Slytherins as well.

Trini can't clearly see Kim or Jason's faces, but Kim grabs his forearm firmly, pulling him back and putting her hand on his chest to steer him away from the hostile group and back towards the pitch.

It takes some effort on Kim's part, and as Trini, Zack, and Billy approach at a jog, now, they get a glimpse of why—Jason's face is arranged in a look of pure rage.

It's _so_ unlike him that Trini immediately has the violent urge to rush the offending group, who are presently walking away from them in the direction of the greenhouses. As they go, their jagged, mocking laughter cuts through the air, seemingly hanging around for a moment too long. 

"What in the bloody hell was that?" Trini asks quickly, steps heavier as she slows, skidding a little as she comes to a stop on the path and looks between Kim and Jason. "Do you want me to go break their legs?"

Zack nods fiercely from beside her and Billy gently puts his hand on Jason's shoulder, who's deflating already but seems to come out of it a bit more at his touch, expression softening back into familiarity.

Jason shakes his head and Kim doesn't even respond; she at once looks exhausted, but there's something else clearly wrong. Her eyes have gone dim, and her usual laid-back posture has been traded for something smaller, more weathered. She stands with her jaw clenching and unclenching rapidly, arms wrapped around herself, fists gripping at the soft black fabric of her hoodie as if trying to find an anchor. Looking ready to fall apart.

And Trini hasn't known either Kim or Jason for very long, but from what she's seen, this is entirely atypical for the both of them.

She's about to set off after the group of Slytherins, drawing her wand out of her sleeve when Kim's voice sounds:

"Listen, I'll meet you lot back at the castle," she says to nobody in particular, not meeting their eyes and evidently trying to keep her voice steady.

Trini and the other three look at her, and all the anger is gone from Jason now. There's only deep, sincere concern in his eyes.

"Kim, she's just being—"

"It's all right Jase. See you guys in a bit, okay?"

Kim walks away from them then, leaving the path that leads up to the castle and swooping down to pick up her _Nimbus 2001_ from where it lays in the grass. She begins crossing the lawn towards the lake, and Trini watches her go with a feeling washing over her that's a lot like failure—like there's something she should have done.

She stares after Kim as the distance between them grows, at a complete loss.

.

Kim quickens her pace as she strides away from her friends, needing to be alone as soon as possible. With effort she attempts to slow down her breathing on her own; Quidditch is one of the rare times when Ptero can't be by her side for obvious reasons—he's safely in his enclosure back in her dorm, and she chastises herself for relying so much on him to keep her steady in moments like this.

And Jason just was inches from hexing someone into oblivion, which is entirely _not_ what needs to happen right now. What Kim _needs_ is to keep her head down and away from Amanda Clarke; to sweat it out until the fever breaks. And as much as she wonders if this isn't dangerous, to harbour this kind of _hatred_ for herself in the meantime—when, on the nights when she feels like she's shipwrecked leagues underwater a familiar reel of her most abhorrent actions tends to replay on loop, when the sheer weight of everything she's done is as substantial and crushing as the pressure of an entire ocean on her shoulders—she knows that there's nowhere to hide from any of it.

Because she's not being tormented by something arbitrary, after all. She's not being chased by demons.

No — Kim's particular poltergeist haunts the surface of still, dark water on cloudy days; it appears in corridors when a shiny suit of armour catches her eye; it stares, unblinking, out of every drinking glass, window, and mirror in this fucking castle.

The shorter hair still throws her sometimes. Sallow skin seems to be stretched more taught, now, over cheek and jaw bones sharp enough to look almost alien. Blueish purple bruises under flickering, tired eyes are unfamiliar, woefully imperfect.

Washed out; a far cry from the person she used to see. Whoever that was.

And after removing all of it—all of the ice and steel and _oil_ that she had encased and covered herself with over the years—she'd found this broken, vulnerable person cowering underneath. The same person who stares out of mirrors back at her now and is somehow the closest to herself that she's felt in _years_.

Everything that she's done is blocks of iron on chains, fastened securely around her ankles and goading her to surrender to their weight, whispering her faults and stoking her guilt like a bush fire in a drought. Setting her entire person aflame—burning her up from the inside out. And after everything, Kim believes that she deserves it.

There are some ghosts that never leave, she thinks. And maybe they'll work out a mutually-agreeable schedule between them as time goes on, where haunting might occur only during the morning hours? Or perhaps a standing appointment, for tormenting to exclusively take place in Potions, when her mind is already elsewhere due to Snape's incessant, tedious drawl.

She shakes her head like she's trying to get water out of her ears.

Still here, still here.

_Still here._

You can't run from yourself.

Kim plucks at her Quidditch kit duffel, mind caught on the picture of her and Amanda that resides there, tucked away safely in a zippered pocket. The one she carries everywhere. Not that she needs a reminder.

Willing tears not to fall, she walks over the sloping lawn, feet carrying her in the direction she wants to go without much conscious thought. As soon as she comes to the edge of the wooded area that surrounds the lake she enters it, checking over her shoulder to make sure she's not being followed and adjusting her broom to sit a bit more comfortably where it's slung by a thick leather strap across her torso.

Kim walks amongst the ancient trees, a chill placating breeze shifting through her hair, footsteps cushioned by the rich moss that blankets the ground.

After ten minutes or so she comes to it—to the small cliff presiding silently above a tiny cove, tucked away from the rest of the school. Her refuge.

Dropping her duffel, she gently leans her broom up against it. Removes her robes from her bag and spreads them out over the smooth rock edge to sit, hugging her knees to her chest and looking out over the Black Lake.

Kim glances down at the photo that's now scrunched up in her right hand. It's enchanted to never wrinkle, an image meant to stand the test of time. Her and Amanda, sitting on lush green grass in a London park and laughing together candidly; a bubbling, bright thing that shook Kim's shoulders and painted a dazzling shine in Amanda's eyes. She remembers that day perfectly.

A profound feeling of loss washes over her. It wasn't supposed to go like this.

.

"Are you sure she's okay?" Trini asks, looking across the Gryffindor table at Jason with clear concern on her face.

He hesitates. "It's... been a lot, Trini," he replies vaguely, with sadness in his voice.

And Trini's well aware that it's none of her business unless Kim discloses it to her, but she can't help but be concerned. She knows what bullies are like.

It seems like a strange situation, though. The Kim she's beginning to know is quick-acting, blazing, and can be reckless at times. But her apparent willingness to let those people go at her, back there? And holding Jason back from a fight, for that matter? It doesn't feel right.

Trini sighs. "I'm not gonna press you. And I know you don't know me very well, but I'm here for the both of you if you ever want to talk about it."

Jason nods once. "She won't say it—at least not yet—but I know she's grateful. As am I, though the only reason I'm tangled up in it is 'cause I refuse to allow her to go through it alone." He pauses for a few moments, considering. "Not for her lack of trying, though," he adds, shaking his head and smiling sadly at Kim's stubbornness.

Trini furrows her brow, feeling an insistent concern tugging at the back of her mind. And she's once again surprised by it, by how she already feels connected to these people, somehow. Her first instinct is usually avoidance, after all—not because of cowardice, but due to a practised apathy. She's been playing at nonchalant for so long that sometimes it's like it bleeds off the page of whatever script she's following. Like over time the more she pretends, the more she becomes.

But with that situation just now, Trini had no urge to walk away whatsoever—no flat affect taking over her entire person. No, she was just as ready to throw down as Jason seemed to be. And she can scrap when she wants to, that's for certain, but finding people she actually cares about enough to _do_ that for is a rarity.

And Kim's somewhere out there in the chilly grounds, alone and trying to hold herself together. A girl who Trini's known to be so much elusive and almost untouchable in how she interacts with the world, like a solid object that keeps vanishing and re-appearing. Tangible, yes, but too quick for anyone to get a grip on it.

That impression is being tossed around in Trini's mind now, flipped and turned, everything she thought she had gleaned up to this point being thrown into question. With this new information, she's now beginning to wonder if Kim's dodging and weaving act—the vanishing and re-appearing, all of it—is more evasive than elusive.

Perhaps Kim's a solid object, yes, but one that's made of glass. Where a point in time frozen in one place for too long could mean exposure. It could mean shattering and cracking, destroying the illusion of something stronger.

Trini clenches her jaw and takes a deep breath in and out, looking across to Jason, whose mind is clearly out in the grounds with Kim as well. "We shouldn't ask her about it, right?" she mutters, trying to meet his eyes. He'd know best, and she doesn't want to make the mistake of _not_ talking about it, if that's what Kim needs.

Jason hesitates for a moment then shakes his head. "I reckon not mentioning it is wise. Mind, she tries to keep... all of this under tight wraps, but that's not going to be possible forever."

He seems to consider his words again, his tongue darting out over his lips and looking a bit apprehensive. "Listen, you two—" he says, looking between Trini and Zack fondly now, "have been a brilliant respite for her from all of this. And I don't mean that on a superficial level at all. She—and Billy and I, of course—has loved hanging out with you guys like we've been."

Trini smiles softly at him, trying to be encouraging.

He gives her a small smile back. "Beginning to know you both _after_ all of this that's happened with her has been lovely, because though I'm sure you both've heard about it vaguely—" Trini nods once and Zack does the same, "it's been nice to find new friends who aren't going to dismiss her right away? We've all clicked so far, at least in my experience."

"Yeah," Trini says quietly. "It's been a nice surprise."

Zack hums his agreement and inclines his head. "We really do enjoy spending time with you three," he says, voice carrying an unusually serious tone. "So if this rubbish with Kim is something that's been happening for a while, which is what it sounds like, I don't want you lot to think you have to hide it from us, innit. We wanna be here in whatever way that works for you," he looks between Jason and Billy, "and for her."

"Yeah, we won't push it," Trini adds, sighing. "No pressure to tell us what's going on. But if we can help, do tell us."

Jason hums. "All of this is... heavy stuff. I expect she'll approach you lot when she feels ready, but until then, better we leave it to her."

"Fair," Zack mutters, shrugging. "Whatever she needs. Whatever you all need."

"And you know that goes both ways," Billy says, smiling. "We're here for you both as well. And we can definitely speak for Kim in that respect too."

Trini smiles back at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'please just take these photos from my hands' by snow patrol.
> 
> \---
> 
> quick chapter this week, so I've put ANOTHER ONE UP TOO! but yes. trini has her first real (if brief) look at what's up with kim. and we get a bit of a clue in regards to just how close kim and amanda were before everything blew up.
> 
> again, time-wise, this is a couple hours after that kim/jason talk last chapter, so thursday night. 
> 
> next chapter opens on the following sunday, right before their NEXT scheduled pick-up game. reminder they're playing twice (sometimes even three times) a week! 
> 
> look out for some SWEET SWEET trimberly interaction next time! kim's been doing a bit of avoiding and trini's realised she... isn't a fan of that. GASP!
> 
> thanks so much for reading my dudes!


	14. Bigger Than Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/7GLvGlqdg2ocugG4G5ih4I?si=eS770zgwSuuWGnvlcqPkRQ). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Yo, wait up!"

Trini slows her steps and turns around to find Kim jogging down the castle front steps, broom in one hand and the other steadying her Quidditch duffel.

When their eyes meet, she flashes Trini a genuine smile—bright, welcoming, like they haven't seen each other in some time.

In a way, they haven't; at least not by the standard that they've built up in the last few weeks. And until last night Trini hadn't realised just how _used to_ seeing Kim every day she's become. Because they don't share classes daily, but they tend to bump into each other nonetheless. Like one of those things where once you're made aware of it, you start seeing it pop up everywhere.

That particular awareness began for Trini immediately after her and Kim met last year, certainly. But she's also never been one to... reach out. Her forte is moving away, not towards.

There were times last year where she would get the feeling that someone was looking at her and glance up, only to catch sight of Kim, apparently deep in conversation with someone else, engrossed in a task, or elsewise unaware of her existence. But as of the last few weeks, Kim seems to be conscious of Trini's presence any time they're within shouting distance; she will smile at Trini as they pass each other in the corridors, meet her eyes across the Great Hall out of nowhere— or more recently, be known to send balls of parchment sailing across the room at Trini's head in History of Magic. On days they don't share lessons, they'll almost always eat at least one meal together with the boys.

After that incident on Thursday night, though, Trini noticed a pronounced absence of any kind of Kim interaction on Friday—she hadn't been around at mealtimes, and though they all share History of Magic in the morning, they don't sit together. What's more, Kim's the one who tends to do the approaching in their relationship; given what Jason said about not mentioning what happened, Trini sat with her roommates as usual, and when the lesson came to an end she elected not to say hi to Kim, Jason, or Billy. She steered clear of them all day (which, in a castle of Hogwarts' size, is easy enough for it to not feel forced) in effort to give Kim some space.

But last night, post _Reading Room_ and upon settling into her bed for the evening, Trini found herself feeling like her and Kim had... fought, or something? Apparently seeing someone so often then suddenly not, even if only for a couple days, can make everything feel off-kilter. It throws a spanner in the works, breaking the comfortable routine.

To be sure, Trini hadn't known if Kim was going to come to pick-up today at all, so the fact that she's jogging toward her now is pleasantly surprising.

And at the sight, Trini gives a half-arsed wave in greeting, finding she has to hold a smile back. Turns to continue making her way down to the pitch just as Kim's about to catch up.

Kim speeds to a halt beside her, feet sliding a bit on the path before she matches Trini's pace. "Hey."

Resisting the urge to ask how Kim is—to offer to jinx those bullies from Thursday to shit, to find some way to fix what happened—Trini keeps her voice casual. "Sup."

"How's everything? Been awhile."

"Kim, it's been two days."

" _Trini_ , stop being a little shit."

Pulling a playfully affronted face, Trini pauses for a moment. Changes tack with a twinkle in her eye. "Do you ever hear someone say your name and kind of go, 'Huh'. Or is that just me?"

"Did that happen just now? It's probably 'cause I used my Stern Voice."

Trini smirks. "Is that what that was?" Kim gives her a deeply unimpressed look in response, and Trini laughs, feeling close to giddy at interacting with her again. "Okay, now _that's_ more like it. Maybe you're more of a physical communicator...?"

There's a beat where she realises that might come off as flirty, but Kim's face remains unchanged, something like amused challenge sparking in her eyes as she mutters, "I'll _physically communicate_ plenty in a minute—"

Trini's still chuckling. "That's right, play to your strengths," she coos, flashing an innocent grin.

Kim stares back at her for a few moments, amusement taking over her whole face, now. "Are you gonna answer my question, or do I need to wait until you've got this out of your system?"

"Might be a while," Trini drawls. "Haven't had the honour of poking fun at you for an _entire_ two days, after all."

Kim grins. "I've been on your mind then, huh?" she chimes. And Trini falters, tongue darting out to wet her lips, about to brush it off when Kim speaks again, voice softer, "I know what you're doing, you know."

Trini looks at her expectantly, unsure of what she's getting at. "And what's that?"

"You're trying to cheer me up."

Trini blinks a couple times, surprised at being called out. "Hey, you never know," she says, keeping her voice at an even tone. "Might just be that I'm completely disregarding your feelings by not asking how you are up front."

Kim scoffs, a soft smile on her face. "Right."

They enter the dark, cool tunnel at the south end of the Quidditch stadium and Trini takes a deep breath in, reveling in the familiar smell that acts on her stuttering heart like honey does on a scratchy throat. "To answer your question, everything is just fine. Zack and I have been living our best lives in the years you and I've been apart."

This earns her another little smile from Kim, and Trini pauses as they walk out onto the pitch, bright grey overcast October sky stretching out above the stadium like a domed, softly swirling ceiling. "Though I was anticipating being hit in the head by a ball of parchment in History," she continues, tilting her head a little, "and when it didn't happen I found myself missing the sensation... which I should probably be concerned about, but I can't be arsed."

"I'll make it up to you next week," Kim quips, laughter in her eyes.

"Lovely."

They continue to banter back and forth as they make their way to the middle of the pitch, aiming their steps to the right and towards the mouth of the larger, wider tunnel that contains the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff team changerooms. Billy is already there, cross-legged in the cool grass and writing in a notebook, softly singing what Trini quickly determines to be ['Walkin' After Midnight'](https://open.spotify.com/track/0Hr79rsnGjXo4GnNcheU4R?si=a_oQ9faNROCZKfJ2KE4K9w) by Patsy Cline.

"Hey B!" Kim calls, once they're twenty yards or so from him. Announcing their presence so they don't come up on him unawares.

He looks up and smiles. "Hi!"

Trini deposits her broom and duffel next to him. Stretches, then moves to sit. Jason and Zack should be arriving soon, with any luck.

Kim collapses into the grass in front of the two of them and lays on her back, humming contentedly.

"How's your morning been?" Billy asks, looking at Kim particularly with soft concern evident on his features.

Kim tips her head to face him. "Improved as it's gone on. Trini here was practically jumping through hoops to cheer me up, just now—"

Trini scoffs. "Give me a _break_ —"

"No really, you should have seen how playful she was being," Kim insists, smiling goofily at Billy.

Making a very determined effort to hide her shy smile, Trini rolls her eyes.

.

A couple hours later, Kim and Billy are walking away from the school broom shed post their scrimmage match, eyes fixed up ahead on Jason, Zack, and Trini. It's darker now, still afternoon; the warm wind whipping about stronger than earlier in effort to usher storm clouds in from over the mountains. 

And they're too far to hear proper, but Zack's clearly just said something moronic, because Jason shoves him lightly as Trini smacks him upside the head, all three laughing.

Kim and Billy watch, both smiling at the sight; fondly, in a way that's entirely involuntary. "What do you think about all of this?" Billy asks, looking to Kim with warmth in his eyes.

"About the five of us, you mean?"

Billy nods, running a hand over his short black hair.

Kim hums but hesitates, a small crease in her brow appearing then vanishing. Still worried, despite Jason's reassurances, that all of this new friendship stuff is doomed to fail.

(And even more so now, given what happened with Amanda last week.)

So she makes a noncommittal noise in response.

"I think it's going quite well, don't you?" Billy tries, peering over at her kindly.

They walk for another few moments in silence, Kim still considering her response. "I—" she starts, sighing. "Yes, of course. I really do _like_ them. Zack and Trini."

She falls silent again and Billy watches her curiously. "What's on your mind, Kim?"

"It's nothing. Everything's good," she replies, a bit too quickly, though she injects a manufactured smoothness into her voice and adjusts her posture to be more relaxed. Feeling pathetic for dwelling on it so much, for being so _scared;_ not wanting to whine.

She makes to quicken her pace a bit, to dismiss the subject and leave the conversation behind, but Billy slows to a halt, stubborn and insistent.

Kim stops too, throwing him a look that says, _'Really?'_ to which he jerks his head a little, encouraging. Fully aware of what he's doing. 

Flexing her jaw a couple times, she tries to find the right words before explaining, "It's just... when Trini and I came down to the pitch earlier, she cheered me up more in a few minutes than I'd been able to manage on my own in the last couple days combined. And she didn't even _do_ anything groundbreaking."

She gestures vaguely, shrugging. "But in the back of my mind, all I keep thinking is that it's not going to matter how well we click, or if we might have the potential to become real friends, because all of this is going to collapse before we ever get there..." she trails off, scoffing a bit at herself.

"Waiting for the other shoe to drop, as it were?" Billy asks, and Kim nods. "Is this why you've been actively avoiding Trini and Zack since Thursday evening?"

Kim blinks. "'Avoid' is a strong word—"

"What else would you call it?" he asks, completely serious. "Evade? Circumvent? Elude? I can get my pocket thesaurus—"

She runs a hand through her hair, sighing loudly. "Okay! I was avoiding them!" she mutters, whining a bit and making a dismissive gesture with her hand. "Can't fault me for being embarrassed, can you? I wasn't expecting them to see the Amanda rubbish so soon. And I didn't keep my composure at all afterward, either, walking away like I did."

"You thought that Trini and Zack would act differently after witnessing that?"

Kim nods dejectedly, suddenly unable to look at him. "Wouldn't you? Like, I get that they don't understand the history there, but I'm trying to project a better image. Shit like that doesn't help." She pauses, and when Billy doesn't say anything, she continues, "It's fine, alright? Bottom line is I agree with you that everything's going well. And Jase already told me not to worry, so you _really_ don't have to poke me about this."

She adjusts her tone to something softer, trying to communicate that she isn't angry, "I appreciate it from both of you, truly, but I can't see my mind changing. It's smarter to expect the worst and save myself the disappointment."

They resume walking as Billy hesitates, silent for a few moments before he speaks, "I'm not trying to change your mind. But full transparency: I _did_ want to talk to you about this." He pauses again, letting out a breath. "When you two came down earlier and you joked about Trini cheering you up, I didn't continue the line of discussion deliberately, even though I felt inclined to comment, because I wanted to share something with you that I felt might be better for a private conversation." 

His tone of voice piques her interest—at once more steady than usual, less rising and falling in a way that makes him sound older, somehow. "What's more, you've just confirmed my suspicion in regards to how you've been feeling. I won't pressure you to tell me anything else, and I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable—"

"You didn't," Kim interjects softly, smirking. "I'm just a sensitive bitch. You know this."

The corner of Billy's mouth ticks up. "Sensitivity isn't a bad thing. But I was worried about you and a direct approach seemed best, given you have a tendency to repress your anxious thoughts and feelings for fear of seeming weak to others."

Kim scoffs, a bit bemused at his honesty, though she knows he doesn't think of it as a jab. There's fondness in his eyes as he stares ahead towards the castle, different than what she's seen from him before. "Again, I'm not trying to change your mind or convince you of anything. I'm just asking you to consider what I have to say, because I have some relevant insight." She slowly nods her agreement and he pauses, hums. "This needs context to explain, so bear with me."

She watches him curiously as he begins, "Trini will shed her snarky tone and trade it for something goofy and bright when she can tell someone she cares about is hurting. It's a strange tendency, seemingly uncharacteristic in someone of her disposition, but I have known her as long as we've been at Hogwarts. It is a certainty."

He slows his walking pace a bit and Kim matches it, fidgeting with the hem of her jumper. "In first year, though we were Potions table-mates, Trini didn't talk much to me initially. I attempted to initiate a friendly camaraderie multiple times, but she was clipped and brisk in her replies." He hums gently; a warm, low sound. "Though not… unkind. Rather, she seemed disinterested, which I resolved to take in stride."

Billy pauses, brow crinkling slightly. "Despite how she behaved, I quickly deduced that my initial impression was incorrect, because it became apparent that she was remembering everything I told her. And... at first I thought that it was perhaps a memory quirk and not an act of friendship. But I began to notice something: though she was reluctant to speak about _herself_ in any capacity, she would engage if we kept the topic on anything else."

He smiles, gesturing stiffly with one hand then dropping it back to his side. "Over time, she used what she learned about me to prompt me, better understand, and listen with a depth that, at the time, I had not encountered in a person our age. She was considerate, and it would come out in the tiniest of ways, scattered through the small amount of words she actually said to me."

Billy turns his head towards Kim, a muted look in his eyes. "You know that by societally conventional standards, I tend to offer new acquaintances an over-abundance of information. I told Trini in our third class together—in September—about my favourite season being autumn, and added that it came with a caveat, given my dad's birthday occurs on the fifteenth of October. She continued to be relatively arms-length with me until that day came a few weeks later: we happened to have class on the fifteenth, and I had an encounter with a bully shortly before. I wasn't having a good day."

"But when Trini entered our classroom, she sat down next to me and it was..." he trails off, pausing. Hums. "Something akin to speaking with a different person, all at once. She was joking in ways that I had very little trouble understanding, and doing it so... _naturally_ , like all she had to do was throw a switch to activate a language that she hadn't even told me she could speak."

His voice breaks a little; wavers, steadies. And like a jab to the gut Kim feels an instinct to reach out for him, startled by his abrupt display of emotion.

But she doesn't touch him. Just watches as he closes his eyes slowly, keeps them shut for a few moments, then opens them again. "And it was the _first_ time in my life that I didn't feel like I was some... extraneously complex puzzle that nobody would ever bother to learn their way around, you know?" His jaw flexes. "Because up until that point, I didn't have any friends. You know I was home-schooled because of the meltdowns—"

Kim nods. Being in muggle school as a wizarding kid is one thing—at such a young age, most children can't control their magic at all, let alone keep it from erupting in high-emotion situations. Mishaps are bound to happen across the board, but Billy is _also_ prone to sensory overload episodes. As a kid, if he had one, it almost always meant he would lose control of his magic too; without a seasoned magic-user around to help diffuse the situation, he could have seriously hurt himself or someone else. It was too dangerous for him to be in an environment where an older witch or wizard was not present at all times.

"...so I never had anything like you, Jason, and Tommy did. I'd met other kids, sure, but most thought I was odd, or wouldn't take to me on a deeper level because they didn't understand how to relate to me. And I can't blame them for that. I understand that being on the spectrum makes me…" he trails off, pauses. "I know that I'm difficult sometimes."

Kim makes a loud disagreeing noise and Billy pauses, brushing his elbow lightly against hers in a barely-there touch to quell her as he continues, "But Trini was the first person other than my parents who went out of their way to make me feel... _seen_. Like my role didn't have to be the expendable film extra by default—that 'different' kid who always sat alone in the corner."

He starts to smile and it spreads, lighting up his watery eyes. "Nah, I could be the ruddy _lead_ if I wanted to be. And, to revert to my original analogy: I started to think that even if I was this unnecessarily complicated puzzle, perhaps someone, if it was the _right_ someone, might just think I was worth the trouble one day."

"B, getting to know you isn't trouble—"

Billy smiles sadly and hums. "I'm starting to believe that slowly, Kim. But my point is that it was _Trini_ who made me realise that I could have real relationships outside of my family — that there were people willing and open enough to learn as much about me as I was them, even if I was different from what they'd encountered before. Since that day in Potions, I have rarely found such ease in talking with another person as I do with her."

He turns to look Kim right in the eye, smiles kindly, then glances away. Shakes his head, looking bewildered. "She made interacting with me seem effortless! Just stepped forward and jived with me so seamlessly that it might not have been noticed by anyone else. But I _knew_ it wasn't as easy as that in my case; nobody can just _decide_ to get along with me. There is an inevitable learning curve, and she made a conscious effort to mould her approach to fit me."

Drumming his fingers on his thigh, he slows his pace to a stop again. Takes a deep breath in and sighs it out. "What I'm getting at is this: being there for someone isn't always about saying the 'right' things. There is a... presence of mind and action that is _so_ important, which can only be accomplished by a real effort to listen and support in a way that _particular person_ needs."

Billy continues to stare ahead, though his eyes are unfocused. "I know you're afraid," he breathes, tone still immeasurably deeper but shifted to something more careful, now, and Kim's throat feels thick all at once. "You think she won't accept what you've done."

Kim continues staring ahead, too. Swallows.

"And I cannot make any guarantee on what she will or won't do," he continues, voice gentle like a melody. "But I know her, and though you may not think it of much importance, her letting her guard down a bit more to try and cheer you up is a very good sign. She took that step, and in my experience with her, that only happens after immense calculation. You see the tip of the iceberg in her words and actions, but the consideration under the surface is... substantial."

Kim hesitates. "Respectfully, don't you think that's a lot of meaning to put on a bit of teasing? She's joked around with me before this..."

"This is post-exposure to the Amanda Situation," Billy insists, shaking his head. "There's a lot to unpack there, and that'd be easy for someone like Trini to infer after what happened. The key is that she didn't shut down when you approached her earlier. That's _huge_ , Kim."

"Is that a thing she does? Shut down?"

Billy nods. "Withdraws, more. She wouldn't have ignored you, per se, but her instinct is to back away—"

"HEY!" comes a warm male voice, carrying down the sloping lawn towards them.

It's Jason, standing at the base of the castle front steps, holding his arms out wide on either side of himself in a gesture of goofy confusion at their dawdling. A moment later, Zack hoists Trini onto his shoulders, who proceeds to wave with both arms like a palm in the wind; signalling the two of them to get a move on, her laugh spinning around the gentle autumn breeze floating over the grounds, beckoning.

Kim returns the summons with an equally silly wave, the wind playing with her choppy hair as Billy starts them walking towards the castle again.

He hums then picks up his previous line of thought, "Trini's instinct is to back away, yes. And the fact that she didn't earlier, the fact that she engaged... it means that she was trying incredibly hard to _stay_. Picture someone struggling to hold a very, very heavy door open."

Kim smiles, watching Zack bounce Trini around on his shoulders. "A very small someone, to be sure." That earns her a little chuckle from Billy, and she sighs heavily. "Thank you for telling me this. I had... some idea that a more toned-down approach might be a good way to go with her. So if she hasn't written me off yet I suppose I'm doing something right...?"

"I think you've a better understanding of her than you realise," Billy says, voice still soft. "Your instincts are good. Don't be afraid to keep nudging her; just continue to do it gently."

Kim takes a calming, deep breath in and out.

"And I'm telling you all of this because you need to hear it," he continues, looking her in the eyes again then back towards their friends. "You need to believe that her and Zack will take a chance on you, and Jason's assurance evidently hasn't done much. I figured I'd give it a try."

To her complete surprise, he reaches down and takes her hand, squeezing it once. Lingers before he lets go. "Give them credit, Kim. They see more of your heart than they let on."

And it's his touch, more than anything, that acts like a validation seal on their whole conversation, leaving a warm tingling in her hand where he touched it, like electricity.

Quiet tears spring to her eyes as she considers that this is the first time he's _ever_ done that—taken her hand purposefully, deliberately. Been comfortable enough with her to initiate that kind of physical contact.

And Kim never thought that she could be _more_ grateful for Billy after he was there for Jason when she refused to be. Her assumption was that their friendship would always be one of association—strong because of their mutual love for Jason, but not because they themselves had any kind of chemistry.

But all at once she's hit with the foolishness of that assumption—to write Billy off as someone too different from herself, a casual friend that could never truly love her after everything she had done, who would never even give her a chance.

Because he _had_ given her a chance. He _is_.

She tips her head back discreetly, taking a shaky deep breath in and out. "Billy... _thank_ you."

Not far from the castle, now, Billy waves at Jason, Zack, and Trini where they're waiting, sat on the front steps of the castle chatting. He looks over at Kim again, searching her eyes. "I have never told you this, but you are very important to me, Kim. I am _with_ you, and I'm here to support you, just as I know you'll support me if I ever need it."

A couple tears threaten to fall and she wipes at them quickly. "You're important to me too."

His smile gets wider, lighting up his own watery eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'bigger than love' by oh wonder
> 
> \--
> 
> hello again! have a slice of trimberly banter! and background on our billy/trini history! she's much more important to him than she knows.
> 
> for those of you who saw the 2017 power rangers movie (ps. reminder the ranger actors in that film are who the kids in this AU LOOK LIKE!!!) you'll be more familiar with my billy's pattern of speech—it's quite substantial! that's the best word I can use! 
> 
> aka he's used to over-explaining in order for people to understand what he's saying, and that's not necessarily because he spouts gibberish (he certainly doesn't), or says stuff that's too Advanced, or anything like that. he's super smart, of course! but mainly, he tends to say things and not fill in gaps that he assumes other people must understand already? most of the time it's just a bit of context or clarification and all is good! but he definitely is not known for being concise. which... is a PERSONAL MOOD! MMPR billy is certainly like this too.
> 
> fun fact: you know who is canonically billy's best 'translator'? OUR GIRL TRINI! I cry! they're the best!
> 
> MAIS OUI! THANKS FOR READING AND I APPRECIATE THE HECK OUT OF ALL OF YOU! 
> 
> PSA!!!! your friendly neighbourhood author is in midterms and is therefore a ZOMBIE! aka bit less of an edit than usual on this and the last chapter but things will be back to normal in two weeks when i'm donezo!
> 
> hope you're all having a good week so far! IT'S OCTOBER HOPE YOU'RE FEELIN SPOOKY!
> 
> (kim and trini get a bit of Nerd Competition going in the next chapter, so look forward to THAT!)


	15. Troubled Mind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/75s9Md3ylhRlx7DEFLV0ye?si=E0a42DucQxa3Nn2eJYaqvw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The trees are beginning to change in the Scottish Highlands: crisp autumn colours summoning up the courage to appear, to make the leap, slowly peeking out in small brave bursts on the borders of the Forbidden Forest and playfully dotting flashes of rich reds and golden yellows all over the surrounding mountains. The breeze is cool as it makes its way through the Hogwarts grounds, though without a bite, too early for that, still holding on to the ends of summer; gentle as it plays with the young vines of the numerous, quickly-growing orange sugar pumpkins in the patch behind Hagrid's cabin.

Kim pulls at the neck of her cloak, taking a deep, content breath in. It's early Monday afternoon and their Care of Magical Creatures lesson is done—passed in what has become typical fashion, consisting of numerous close calls and plenty of frustrated or alarmed curse words shouted throughout. And despite the Skrewts clearly intending otherwise, Kim, Rose, Jason, and the rest of their class have managed to make it through alive (and with all of their limbs intact).

Jason in particular is noticeably relieved, given he still seems a bit scarred by his first Blast-Ended Skrewt experience—easy to spot, now that the regular saunter Kim usually associates with him has repeatedly and consistently changed to something more like a scutter when in mere sight of a Skrewt.

His fright is only evidenced further when, just as they all start to leave at the end of the lesson, he _jumps_ a solid two feet straight up into the air after one nearby emits a louder-than-usual explosive _BANG_. Kim has to work _very_ hard at holding in her laughter, and Rose most definitely fails at doing so, cackling at him the entire way back up to the castle.

They bid Rose goodbye to sit at the Ravenclaw table for lunch, and an hour later Kim is striding into the airy, cathedral-like Arithmancy classroom with Jason and Billy on her heels. The magnificent looming wooden doors slowly _creak_ closed behind them until they shut with a noise like hushed thunder, deep but warm, somehow; contrasting with the cool, pale brightness of the room, made so by light stone walls comprised mostly of narrow, towering lancet windows that welcome the overcast October light inside.

Entering the centre aisle, Kim's about to continue towards their regular seats when she notes Zack and Trini sitting together on their right—Trini with a giant, red tartan blanket wrapped around her shoulders, using a common tactic employed by students who have lessons in this classroom in the cooler months, drafty as it is. The two of them are surrounded by a handful of Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs that are familiar to Kim, some vaguely.

They could sit nearby, right? What could it hurt?

_Would that be weird?_

Jason seems to have the same idea and turns to Billy, addressing him quietly, "Billy, how would you feel about switching up seats today?" he asks, searching his eyes. Changing routine isn't Billy's favourite thing, and some days he's more up to it than others.

Billy seems to hesitate a little, looking at their regular seats then back to Jason a bit apprehensively. "Where were you thinking, Jason?"

Jason shrugs easily, making sure to communicate that it's a non-issue. "Just saw Zack and Trini over there, but we can go to our normal spot," he says, starting to walk in the direction of their regular seats, which are near the front. "No big deal—"

Billy lights up though, interjecting, "Oh, I'd like to sit with Zack and Trini, actually!"

Kim blinks, his quick change in tack surprising her (and Jason clearly as well). Because if Zack and Trini are that much of a selling point for Billy already, then that's... really great. And after their talk about Trini yesterday Kim should have expected it, but to see it in action is another thing entirely. Her heart warms unbidden, seeing how at ease Billy looks with the prospect of changing seats now.

Jason smiles wide. "Cool," he says, leading the way to the row just behind where Zack and Trini sit, closer the back of the classroom. Beside them are two of Trini's roommates, along with Rocky, his girlfriend Sky, and Will Aston, another Gryffindor girl in their year.

"Alright, roomies?" Jason chimes, looking between Zack and Rocky, who have both twisted around in their seats with big smiles on their faces.

"Hey mate," Rocky returns easily, holding his hand out towards them, where Jason smacks it obnoxiously in some kind of Boy Handshake.

They sit, with Billy immediately bringing his writing materials out and setting himself up. Kim takes a deep breath in and out, almost feeling the calm coming off of him.

And Trini's turned around too, still in her blanket cocoon, looking between the three of them with an expression Kim can't place. "Are my worlds colliding proper, then?"

"If that's okay with you," Kim replies, a teasing lilt in her voice. Holding Trini's gaze.

Zack smiles. "More efficient for us this way, isn't it?" he chirps, then squints, a playful glint in his eye. "Plus, individual social interactions and Trini's level of niceness are inversely related on the daily. Cause and effect kind of thing—pure maths."

It takes Trini all of one second to realise what he's said, and she promptly rolls a page of parchment up in her hand and makes to smack him on the head with it, leaning wildly over her roommates to do so, but he ducks away, chuckling.

Billy looks up, smiling softly. "You mean to say that the more social interactions Trini has in a day, the meaner she is? A proper Arithmancy function, then."

Zack nods gravely as Trini gives up on reaching across her roommates and gets up from her seat proper, walking right over to stand in front of him and swatting at his head repeatedly. He holds up his hands to protect his face, laughing, and once she seems satisfied, she strolls back to her seat and plops down like nothing happened.

"See? Safer for everyone," Zack stage-whispers. "If we get all her socialising over with _now_ in one go, she'll be much less of an arse. People annoy her, innit."

Trini turns around again, pretending not to have heard him. "As I was about to say, you lot are welcome to sit in our general vicinity."

"But not in front of you though," Kim quips, keeping a straight face with effort and feigning absentmindedness as she takes out her books. "Wouldn't want you to need a booster seat."

There's a beat where one of Trini's roommates—the pretty one—starts sniggering silently, her back shaking. And Trini stares Kim down for a moment before raising an eyebrow. "I could best you in this class regardless of the scenario, booster seat or no booster seat," she says, shrugging one shoulder nonchalantly.

"'Is that a challenge?'" Kim growls, dropping her chin to look at Trini darkly, eyebrows raised and injecting a bit of a rasp into her voice. She puts a particular inflection on it, wondering if Trini will get the _Lion King_ reference.

_Too vague, maybe._

But there's a little twitch in Trini's brow and around the borders of her eyes before she smirks, and genuinely, though she looks bemused. "'Temper, temper,'" she replies, voice posh. And Kim smiles back at her like an _idiot_. "Deviation from the script, though—sure, let's make it a challenge."

Kim tilts her head. "Name your terms, booster seat."

Trini's mouth falls open a little, a crooked, still bewildered smile pulling at it, and rolls her eyes good-naturedly. "Loser has to do the winner's Arithmancy homework for a week?"

"Done."

"I like you," Trini's pretty roommate says then, twisting around in her seat and regarding Kim with amusement. "I'm Summer, by the way. Ripping on Trini is my favourite pastime."

"Kim," she returns, giving a little nod. "But you can call me 'winner' if you want."

Jason throws his head back dramatically and groans, Sky rolls her eyes, Rocky _beams_ , and Billy chuckles, shaking his head.

"You lot're children," Will mutters, looking between them with a small smile on her face.

Kim shrugs as Professor Vector comes striding into the classroom, arriving at the teacher's desk and taking a stack of parchment pages from her briefcase.

Jason hums then, still smiling a little. "How about your scores on the quiz determine the winner? Looks like she's going to hand them back today." He pauses, looking between them. "Or are we intending to drag this out?" Trini and Kim both shrug noncommittally, which he takes as agreement. "Alright then, whoever scores higher has to do the other's homework for next class. Deal?"

Kim holds her hand out, smirking, and Trini takes it.

And Trini's hand is warm, soft, save for the four tiny calluses at the top of her palm—from Quidditch, likely. Unavoidable in the sport despite them wearing gloves; Kim has them too.

They let go and Kim exhales a breath.

"Settle down, all," Professor Vector barks, starting to write on the blackboard. Trini and the others turn around to face the front, and Kim starts copying her words down. "Given your performance on the pop quiz, we're going to do another, more in-depth review lecture," she announces drily, waving her wand at the stack of parchment on her desk. The pages all go soaring through the classroom in an orderly fashion, finding each of their owners.

Kim plucks hers from the air in front of her face and frowns at the score: a little black nineteen over twenty. "Arse," she breathes, looking over it for her mistake.

And, ah, she miscalculated a vector, and just barely. Mixed up the formula with a similar one.

Trini turns around in her seat slowly, looking less than pleased herself, and holds hers up for Kim to see.

Nineteen out of twenty.

Kim chuckles lightly, showing her quiz as well. Trini's eyebrows quirk up a bit, and she gives Kim a curious look.

Jason cranes his head to look between them, scoffing a little when he sees the scores. He takes both of the parchment pages gently, comparing the two side-by-side. "Even got the same question wrong, and in the same way..." he mutters, looking up at Kim with a little twinkle in his eye.

"Five points to Ravenclaw for the top mark," Professor Vector says, voice full and rolling in how it carries through the room, back still turned as she writes on the blackboard. And Kim and Jason look at the same time to Billy, who, at the questions on their faces, holds his quiz up for them to see: a perfect score.

Kim smiles and looks down at her own again, a bit annoyed at herself.

 _Bollocks_.

She tilts her head up to see Trini looking at her. "We didn't say what happens in the event of a tie."

Kim hums. "Do the questions half-half then swap?" she tries.

Trini regards her with a soft, barely-there smile. "Sure. Done by free period on Wednesday?"

"Deal."

.

Tuesday night finds Kim sitting in a deserted dungeon classroom, her old teardrop gas lamp the singular warmth in an otherwise very present darkness, soft light streaking along the floor and up the walls, meeting the eerie green glow of the dungeon lamps now dimmed to but a flicker at the late hour.

Back to the frigid stone wall and knees drawn up close to her body, she's presently using a book as a writing desk with the others open and spread out on the floor in front of her, having just finished her half of the Arithmancy questions that she's to swap with Trini tomorrow.

She takes a sip of the tea in her thermos, cold long ago, scrunching up her face a little at how steeped it is at this point—bitter, coating her tongue—and continues on with her Transfiguration homework, taking notes on the assigned reading in preparation for beginning their unit on Switching Spells.

Sitting on her left is her gramophone, softly playing an album that came out a few weeks ago: The Notorious B.I.G.'s [_Ready To Die_](https://open.spotify.com/album/2HTbQ0RHwukKVXAlTmCZP2?si=6c9aGqzRQSWU9RJx9Wn5OA).

And it's not hers—a homework companion on loan from Damon Henderson, one of the Slytherin boys in her year. Her House has a sort of record sharing system going, affectionately called _Slytherin Spins_ , an attempt to fill the culture gaps present with Hogwarts' relative isolation from the rest of the world, absent a music shop or current events stand of any kind.

And it's a _sharing_ program given that making copies of records seems to stump even the upper-year students—in trying to spin the duplicates, the playback's never _quite_ right.

Kim's managed to make it work for books with a lot of practise, but the spell is like anything, where some iterations are more complicated than others. So where the ideal scenario would be one person buying the album and everyone who wants it getting a charmed copy—given there are no anti-duplication jinxes on muggle-made goods—sharing the records as a collective works just fine. And there's an accidental, unintentional kind of camaraderie that's sprung up within the whole thing that she's come to genuinely appreciate.

She taps her foot to the beat as ['Juicy'](https://open.spotify.com/track/5ByAIlEEnxYdvpnezg7HTX?si=2rW6xjXwTlyM_xQ8WDAlVg) plays quietly from beside her.

And it's nice, because between all of them who share records there are thousands of albums, all from different genres, styles, and time periods. They're all listed in a large black leather-bound notebook— _The Ssspin Compendium_ , the boys who run the sharing system dubbed it, much to Kim's delight—that hangs from a bit of rope next to the noticeboard in the common room. At the very back is the Greatest Hits list, where anyone in on the system can write up to ten of their own recommendations—their favourite albums of all time.

Kim hasn't gotten around to that part yet, though it's been on her to-do list for... two? years. She certainly has a working list going in one of her own notebooks, but picking ten albums is _hard_ , and it's not a task she takes lightly.

The sharing system has been a great thing, though, allowing them all to hear new music without spending exorbitant amounts of money, for one, and discovering new artists to boot that they likely wouldn't have otherwise. Kim's found some of her favourite music from trying an album out on a whim.

Because the four boys in her year who run it do an 'Album of the Week' bit as well: an overlarge, enchanted page of parchment tacked beside the noticeboard in the common room that has a recommendation from each of them with a little blurb attached. She's tried plenty of records based on their picks alone, or by perusing the Greatest Hits list in the back of the _Compendium_.

If someone wants to borrow an album they recommend, or any of the others in the collective library, they write on the parchment next to the noticeboard and one of the boys brokers the exchange; simple, easy. And anyone can join in on the whole thing, regardless of if they have a hundred records in their personal collection or zero. All they need is their own gramophone.

It's one of her favourite things about her House.

Kim lets a breath out and glances at her beater wristwatch: it's nearly curfew. And not that she would usually care, but she barely slept last night. Listening to the rest of the album will have to wait until tomorrow.

She gets to her feet and stretches, immediately feeling Ptero move where he's wrapped around her neck, having passed out an hour and a half or so ago following his (very exciting and successful) mouse hunt.

After a moment, a tiny, sleepy hiss reaches her ears in the near-silence of the dungeon, " _Bedtime?_ " he asks, bumping the underside of her jaw with the top of his head.

" _Bedtime,_ " she echoes in Parseltongue, yawning.

Kim waves her wand to pack everything up, lazy as an ass but giving zero fucks at all about it with how tired she is. And admittedly, the homework load is manageable, but her being fatigued because of other, mental health-related things is not. It's messing with her work ethic, and though she's doing alright so far, she wonders how long she can keep it up if she continues to feel like this.

" _Go back to sleep, love. Not time to wake up yet,_ " she coos softly, running her finger along Ptero's back gently as she picks her gramophone up and shoulders her bag. He's mostly nocturnal, after all, and she wants him to get enough rest.

Sighing contentedly, she murmurs, " _Lumos,_ " to push a light spell out of her palm, peers around to make sure she hasn't forgotten anything, and heads for the door.

Ptero makes a little acquiescing noise and snuggles into the dip of her collarbone. " _Are you going out later tonight?_ "

Kim pops her head out of the abandoned classroom slowly. " _Not planning on it,_ " she mutters, peering both ways along the dark dungeon corridor before emerging. " _Who knows, P, this might be the night I sleep like a log!_ "

" _We can hope! I expect you to be unconscious when I wake up._ "

She chuckles. " _That's the goal. But for now: back to bed, you,_ " she says quietly, reaching up with her finger again to tickle near his belly. " _You've already had quite the night! Still got another hour or so of beauty sleep._ "

" _Okay, okay,_ " he hisses, bopping her jaw again and curling around her neck once more.

.

Once Kim's back in her dorm she gently places a half-asleep Ptero in his enclosure and hastily gets ready for bed. Upon crawling under the covers, at long last, she finds her sheets cool in a reflexively satisfying way, activating some latent burrowing instinct along with the overpowering silly urge to smush her face into her pillow like an idiot. And she certainly _does_ do that, snapping her fingers once to draw the green silk curtains of her four-poster bed closed by magic and laying there in dramatic, horizontal bliss for a few moments.

With another deep breath in and out—more relaxed, now—Kim sits up against her headboard to start her weekly letter to her mum. And as she begins to write, she outlines everything that's been going on without feeling the need to sugarcoat in regards to her mood—telling her mum all about the lethargy, the detours into the Depression Zone, and the panic attacks.

Talking about it doesn't feel strange, either, because discussing 'heavier' topics is the main reason her mum instituted this weekly letter arrangement in the first place. It took some time for Kim to get used to sharing things, but it's been a good way to practise self-evaluation, if anything. And beyond that, she never could have guessed just how _valuable_ having an open, honest, and unashamed line of communication with a parent could be? or how much more secure she would feel, knowing that a Competent Real Adult was getting her the help she needed and supporting her personally, besides?

Kim doesn't tell her mum _everything_ , but in the past year and a half or so the two of them have become exceedingly close. None of this mental health stuff is exactly new—just unfortunate in its prolonged occurrence, given they were hoping that since the summer was going okay on the whole for Kim, coming back to school would continue on the improvement path.

To be sure, she really _is_ improving—it's much, much slower than she would like, but it's something. There are better people around her than there used to be, academically she's on a better track, and her mind is in a healthier place than it was.

Once she's done with the more introspective update, and having sent the past two letters without describing Trini and Zack in the Water Fight Incident, Kim tells her mum _all_ about that in detail too, smiling as she writes.

Because she's already gushed about their first few pick-up games, sure; but Trini and Zack seem to be increasingly everywhere, even in the week and a half since her last letter—what with the five of them as a group already sharing plenty of classes and a free period, Kim finally growing a backbone and starting to sit with Trini in Ancient Runes, and them all playing Quidditch together twice a week now at the least.

So Kim tells her mum all about Zack: about how ridiculous he is, his whirlwind personality, and his fiery heart. And part of her feels a pang of regret as she tries to put him into words, wishing she had met him earlier, and properly. Because he's Jason's roommate, after all; if things were different, if Kim hadn't been such a fuck up in their first two years at Hogwarts, they all might have clicked sooner.

She shakes herself. No matter now.

And she should really try to reel it back with the _friendship enthusiasm_ , because both Trini and Zack already have plenty of people they surround themselves with regularly—it's not like they're looking for more. But she can't help but hope that she comes to know them better with time.

Kim writes about Trini too—writes about how she seems done with life 99% of the time until she isn't, until she says or does something that throws Kim completely, so that she all at once feels outside of herself, like she's in a dream where she's flying but can't get down;

And Kim has to consciously tell herself not to overthink when that happens, to just let herself look out over the world suddenly laid out before her, at all of the possibility and wonder, without trying to figure out _why_ she's flying at all—

(She... doesn't phrase it _exactly_ like that in her letter, though. Gotta draw the privacy line somewhere.)

But her hand flies across the parchment, writing about how fucking smart Trini is, how she's _never_ seen a better Beater at Hogwarts, even at their age. She tries to describe Trini's _stupid_ , smug smirks, the quips that match Kim's shot for shot, all wrapped up and existing within her reserved, scowling personality that, from time to time, will blur into something more open, even if for a moment.

And she doesn't realise how much she's gone on until she stops abruptly, blinking a few times.

Seeing that she's spent a quarter of the letter talking about Zack and half of it talking about Trini, Kim has a few moments where she seriously considers just scrapping all of it before muttering, "Fuck it."

With a content sigh, she folds the letter up and pushes it into an envelope. Writes her mum's name and address then taps it with her finger, sealing it with magic.

Stretching a little, Kim yawns wildly and tips herself over the side of her bed. Pulling the curtain back, she drops the envelope into the drawer of her nightstand, which, when opened, gives off the smooth smell of rich ancient wood. It fills her nose, makes her loath to close it but she does, leaving the letter there to sleep just as she's about to.

Too tired to send it now; a task for tomorrow.

She turns over, pulling her covers up to her chin and beginning her marathon effort of chasing sleep; faintly wondering if she'll dream of flying again tonight.

.

"Kim, what on earth does this say?" Trini mutters, pushing the page across the library table with a puzzled frown on her face, pointing to a spot around the middle.

Giving a little hum in acknowledgement, Kim stretches forward off of her seat to smack it with her whole hand, splaying her fingers out as she slides the parchment across the large table and towards herself. Peering down at it in the general vicinity of where Trini indicated, she runs her hand over the side of her face a bit roughly, sleepy eyes squinting a little at one of the questions Professor Vector set them for next class:

_9\. By Agrippa's system—_

_A) Was Merlin's potential for fantastic magical achievement foreseeable?_  
_B) i. Could we have predicted that his successes/achievements would outweigh his failures?_  
_ii. If so, and in light of these, would those predictions have changed as his life went on?_  
_**NOTE:**_ _Explain your answers in sentences. Submit calculations on a separate page of parchment._

Kim rubs at her temple as she speed-reads her written answer below it, scanning her scratchy writing for anything super jumbled.

_**QUESTION NINE** _

**_A) IF eight is the most unpredictable Number by nature of infinity,_**  
**_AND we accept that personality type is indicative of success or failure,_**  
**_THEN Merlin's potential for fantastic magical achievement was predictable from the start._**

 _**B) i. IF (tends to positive infinity = success), (tends to negative infinity = failure),** _  
_**IF the nature of infinity is a predictability paradox, where a divined probability tends to positive infinity and tends to negative infinity,** _  
_**THEN as per his Character Number of eight, predictability of Merlin's potential for successes would be equal to the predictability of his potential for failures.** _  
_**THEREFORE Merlin's successes outweighing his failures could not have been divined, as the predictability potential for both his success and failure were EQUAL.** _  
_**ii. No, given predictions don't change with time as per the Agrippa method. From the start, Merlin's power had a potential for failure that was directly in line with potential for success. Furthermore, with his Character Number of eight—which is indicative of extremes in fate—any prediction would have skewed no more to one particular side or direction regardless of what he did.** _

She blinks slowly, so used to her cramped handwriting that she's unable to pick out where Trini can't read it. With a lurch she gets up and walks around the table, trainers padding along the floor with measured attempt at lightness as they carry her to Trini's side.

Kim places the parchment back down in front of Trini gently, drums her fingers on it, and leans down. "Okay, my bad. I know it's illegible. Where do you need me to translate?" she asks quietly, her words coming out without much conscious thought, mind more focused on keeping a physical gap of space between them. Trying to make sure Trini's comfortable. And it's proving more difficult than it should be, given Kim's tiredly swaying on her feet a little.

Trini points and Kim nods, beginning to read aloud, "'...outweighing his failures could not have been divined, as the predictability potential—'"

" _Divined as the predictability potential_ ," Trini repeats, sighing and tapping her quill on her parchment. She copies the words down and removes her reading glasses, rubbing a bit at her eyes. "I really should've been able to glean that," she mutters, sounding exhausted. They've all been in the library for hours working steadily since their free period began, and are well past supper now.

And admittedly, Kim can see how Trini had trouble reading the answer. Her writing is just shy of atrocious on the best of days, and she was working on these questions last night in low light, which doesn't help.

There's a pause for a beat. When Trini speaks again her voice changes a little, getting lighter as she turns in her seat, putting her glasses back on and pushing them only halfway up her nose so she peers up at Kim in a very Professor McGonagall-ish way. "But maybe I should fix a couple blank pages into my Runes syllabary so you can give me a key, you know?" she chimes, tone helpful, a smirk playing at the corner of her mouth. "So in the future I can read whatever language it is that you're writing in without having to ask."

"Hah, hah, hah," Kim mutters drily, leaving her completed half of the questions with Trini and returning to her seat, dropping into it with a huff and resuming her Charms assignment. As she situates herself again Ptero stirs gently against her chest, fast asleep and safely curled up in the pocket sewn behind the Slytherin crest on her robes. 

"I actually don't mind this stuff," Trini says a minute later, not looking up from copying the rest of Kim's half of the answers down. "As far as telling the future goes, this is by far the only branch of Divination magic I'd ever want to learn about." She taps her parchment lightly. "Merlin being a character eight makes _so_ much sense—the potential for extremes, the volatility."

Kim nods. "The most unpredictable, for sure. Take it from me, I'm a character eight too."

Trini looks at her curiously. "I'm a social eight."

"Heart eight," Zack chimes, giving them both a little half-arsed salute from over his Potions textbook.

"No way eh?" Kim mutters, genuinely surprised. Admittedly, she doesn't put a whole lot of stock in Arithmancy and Numerology, but they've been around as magical areas of study for _thousands_ of years—there's something to be said for that, and she's not going to knock magic that she herself doesn't understand completely.

Jason scoffs good-naturedly from her right. "Okay, executive decision—as the three sides of the Future-Telling Volatility Triangle, you lot are _never_ allowed to be alone unsupervised."

At this, Kim, Zack, and Trini look between each other with sly smiles. Because really, who knew?

And Kim's eyes linger on Trini, because her being a social eight is curious, given that a person's social number relates to how they _act._ It's the outer personality that they show to the world, the face people see on the regular.

But Trini seems to be on an even keel all of the time, or else is trying _very_ hard to be. And while an eight suggests practicality, commitment, and ambition, it carries the weight of being the most unpredictable number; it always has the potential to go one way or the other, regardless of the situation. Like a coin constantly being flipped, with the previous outcome never having any influence on the next.

It's curious, Trini being a social eight, because it would suggest that underneath that calm, cool exterior, she's much more of a tornado than she appears.

Considering this, Kim realises that Trini's number makes _complete_ sense.

She looks back down at her Charms book and makes a mental note to ask Trini and Zack both about their other numbers, perhaps on a day when she's more awake. Because them all having eights is quite cool, and almost always, each of a person's three numbers will be different—their social number different from both their character number and their heart number, which depict their personality on a general scale, and their inner desires, fears, and the like respectively.

And Kim's come to grip with _her_ character number being such a duality of concept, because it makes sense for her—encompassing her apparent ability to go from good to bad and back again without batting an eye. Though she sincerely hopes in the future that it'll mean something different, maybe foretelling determination in the face of adversity, or soaring successes after crushing failures, or the practised ability to hold different parts of herself inside her mind without them resorting to tearing each other apart.

Eight being Zack's heart number is understandable, too—she pictures his inner self as crackling violent energy and a calming tempering presence existing at once, somehow. A predictability paradox at its most basic yet most complex, tending towards both negative and positive infinity at once.

For the moment, though, Kim stops herself from continuing the conversation and forces herself to finish her homework. There will be a day for more discussion, for getting to know these quirky bits of information about one another, but she needs to get some sleep first. Ideally _before_ she dies from exhaustion, though some shuteye would be welcome in either case.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'troubled mind' by dan mangan
> 
> kim and trini's little two line challenge exchange is right out of the lion king, as mentioned in text. they're marked with double quotes! so "'temper, temper'" kind of deal.
> 
> \---
> 
> but yes. S U R P R I S E !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we be a tad bit early! _cackles_
> 
> everything is finally (slowly) COMING TOGETHER! they're all starting to SEE EACH OTHER MUCH MORE OFTEN! 
> 
> otherwise, we've got a little bit of slytherin lore in there, which I very much enjoy delving into! more to come! and a bit of insight as to what arithmancy actually IS, because we don't hear a whole lot about it in the HP books. it's basically magical maths! numbers divination! canonically hermione jean granger's FAVOURITE HOGWARTS CLASS, LADS! ancient stuff. very cool. 
> 
> AND! we have the promised little Nerd Competitiveness bit between trini and kim. 
> 
> sidebar -- they're nerds! both of them! I'm aware that their portrayal in fic tends to skew a tad bit more to the Not So Academically Inclined side (and that's cool! you do you!)???? but we know MMPR trini is a fucking ninja _nerd_ to the high heavens, and MMPR kim is super skilled in a whole variety of things! she's witty as FUCK! can play the guitar! was very much intending to go to post-secondary after she graduated! can fly ACTUAL PLANES (besides her zord)! knows multiple languages! etcetera! 
> 
> this shit is in different AREAS!
> 
> not to mention 2017 movie kim and trini are both in AP bio, which... you gotta have good grades for that shit! and according to the movie props, kim got an A+ mark on their exam review test! we don't know about the rest of their subjects, but that's a good indicator, at least. 
> 
> NOW! fun facts on handwriting---  
> \- speaking of the 2017 movie props, you can thank them for giving me a writing sample for both of our girls. the fonts I've chosen (hoping they render for you guys, fingers crossed) are the closest i could get to what their handwriting is shown to look like (while also weaving in some character stuff relevant to this story, of course).  
> \- each of the five kids' handwriting gets described in a few chapters, so worry not if kim's written part above just shows up normal-looking for you! (I will be sad about it if that's the case but alas!)  
> \- you'll see trini's down the line, promise. if you're curious, though, kim's font is 'bradley hand', and trini's is... wait for it... 'RAGE ITALIC'. 
> 
> can't make this shit up. poetic cinema.
> 
> (ALSO YES HELLO FOR YOUR INFORMATION, a fun fact on the subject of trimberly and school! kim has a lined paper [page](https://content.propstore.com/auction/powerrangers/listings/91350/img06.jpg) that sports trini's [handwriting](https://content.propstore.com/auction/powerrangers/listings/91700/img03.jpg) stuck in her 2017 movie prop binder. THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I'M NOT MAKING [THIS](https://us.propstoreauction.com/view-auctions/catalog/id/136/lot/27672/?url=%2Fview-auctions%2Fcatalog%2Fid%2F136%2F%3Fpage%3D12) [UP](https://us.propstoreauction.com/view-auctions/catalog/id/136/lot/27412/?url=%2Fview-auctions%2Fcatalog%2Fid%2F136%2F%3Fpage%3D1%26key%3D%26cat%3D1249%26xclosed%3Dno)! and it's so????? it's just little reminder notes! like to bring extra keys for tommy! to do the practise test! trini is trying to help her remember things! THEY ARE ADORABLE DARLING ANGELS!)
> 
> we were robbed of so much with not getting this sequel don't _touch_ me.
> 
> Large Sigh.
> 
> anyway, there you have it! thanks so much for reading as always, comments are so very much appreciated (like holy shit THANK YOU for taking time out of your day I have teared up more than once), reminder I'm still in midterms/the disclaimer from last time still applies, and DO I have some Soft Trimberly for you next chapter. HOO BOY!
> 
> until next time! hope you're all having a lovely weekend so far. take care and be safe!


	16. Awake

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/2UoZfgN00Q3o494A0GsSrG?si=c92UGKzRRBq6q9kBSr0ltA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Trini loves Hagrid. She really, really does. But Blast-Ended Skrewts? Even for someone like her, there are _limits_.

Presently hissing in a manner akin to a _very_ upset goose, Trini flaps her arm through the air quickly. The right sleeve of her robes is on fire.

" _Aguamenti_ ," comes a calm, clear voice. A jet of water hits her arm with a quick sizzling sound, causing a puff of steam to materialise.

Trini grits her teeth painfully and looks around to see Billy standing beside her, a deeply concerned look on his face. On the cool dry grass a solid _ten_ feet away is Chip, who, grumbling but unharmed, gets up and starts wiping at her face. It doesn't do much to help really, given she's covered head to toe in soot from the Skrewt's crate exploding.

"Thanks. Swear they're in their moody rebellious stage or something," Trini mutters to Billy, bending her arm at an awkward angle to get a better look at the burn damage. Her stomach flips at what she sees so she looks away, pointing her wand at the busted crate with her left hand. " _Reparo_."

The splintered wood pieces fit back together, enclosing the Skrewt in its crate safely. It's the end of lesson, and her and Chip—along with everyone else—were trying to put theirs to bed. Nicely.

"They do seem more volatile than usual," Billy agrees, stepping forward to peer at her burn.

"Are you okay, mate?" Trini says to Chip, who's come over to stand next to them.

"'M fine," Chip replies, then frowns as she looks at Trini's arm. "Sorry I couldn't put that out for you quicker."

"You were a bit displaced," Trini deadpans, consciously trying to slow her breathing. Her heart's racing from the pain. "No worries."

Summer and Gia come walking over as Billy looks around at the rest of the class, most of whom are beginning to make their way back up to the castle, and nods to himself. "Let me just grab my bag, and we'll go get that looked at," he says, smiling kindly at her.

Trini shakes her head. "I'm good, Billy. Get to supper, I'll sort it out—"

"No thank you," Billy interjects, mimicking Trini by shaking his head in the exact same way, then walking over to where his roommates, Koda Sudarso and Oliver Rivers, are standing next to his bag waiting. Billy talks with them for a moment, then they both smile at him and turn to leave.

"I've always liked him," Chip says quietly, as Billy starts to make his way back over. "Seems like a good bloke."

"And he gives you lip without fear!" Gia chimes, bopping Trini's shoulder.

Summer hums. "Admirable. Though that's probably because he's six feet tall. You barely reach his shins."

Trini reaches over with her good hand and shoves Summer as Billy comes back, his rucksack perched on his shoulders, then gestures to the path that will take them up to the castle. "After you four," he says politely.

They make their way back up through the chilly evening, not dark in the grounds yet but certainly getting there, and all sigh happily once they walk through the oak front doors and into the warm Entrance Hall.

Billy goes to continue forward to the marble staircase, but Trini makes a noise in protest. "I'm not going to the hospital wing," she says gently, and he wheels around to fix her with a questioning look.

"Trini, you need to have that cleaned and bandaged," Billy says, sounding more matter-of-fact than insistent.

Trini nods and starts to walk to the right, towards the door that will take her down to the Hufflepuff common room. "I've a few things in my dorm that'll work." She pauses, grimacing a little. "Honestly, I don't want to get Hagrid in trouble. Not when I can do the same thing myself that Madam Pomfrey will."

Billy seems to find no qualms with her reasoning and sighs. "Okay. Can I patch it up for you, though? It'll be easier if someone else does it."

"Someone else does what?" comes Zack's voice, just as he sails in to stand between Billy and Gia. Jason and Kim come up behind him, blinking a bit at the bright welcoming light streaming out of the Great Hall, given they've been in Snape's dreary dungeon for the last hour and a half.

"Nothing—" Trini starts.

"Trini did the same thing you did, Jason," Billy says at the same time, gesturing to her arm. "I haven't examined it, but she has a burn and, by my estimation, a negligible chance of blunt force trauma."

"Crate exploded," Trini mutters, backing away from everyone slowly, aiming for the door to the basement. She doesn't fancy being the centre of attention like this.

"I've got it," Summer says, smiling genuinely at Billy then pinching at Trini's robes, beginning to unceremoniously drag her toward the basement door. "Be back up in a minute." She jerks her head at Gia and Chip, and they both nod.

Kim frowns and steps forward just once into the empty space in the middle of their little circle, lurching a bit as if to stop herself from following further. "Well, wait — I can do that, Summer. I've a first aid kit in my bag."

Summer whirls around, long blonde hair flying. "Oh _do_ you?" she replies sweetly, meeting Trini's eyes with a look of pure mirth.

Billy hums. "Kim likely has the most healing magic training of anyone here," he explains, looking between Chip and Gia for any disagreement, who both give a little affirmative shrug. "In her hands Trini will be taken care of both well and quickly."

"Well and quick sounds _lovely_. She's all yours then," Summer says, pushing Trini gently forward in Kim's direction. And at her tone—a clear indication that there's going to be teasing about this later, euphemisms abounds—Trini can feel a blush starting to creep up her neck. Especially given Billy's phrasing on that last bit.

But Kim straightens her spine a little, clearly not sure if Summer's cheeky tone is directed at her or not. Her face gets a bit harder, and she blinks slowly before tipping her head once in a small nod.

No stranger to being cold as a defense mechanism, Summer senses the change and clarifies, "Didn't mean to sound like a git there, Kim. I'm just teasing Trini, here—" Trini shoves her in warning and Summer changes tack beautifully, "...about how accident-prone she is. It's one thing after another, really—"

Gia smirks. "Can't hardly keep up, so you have our thanks in advance for taking care of her quickly," she says, tongue between her teeth and now using her sleeve to try and wipe some of the soot off Chip's face.

"We're planning on child-proofing the dorm at this point," Chip adds, eyes screwed shut as Gia works.

Trini lets out a little breath. Because Summer was certainly about to make a comment with heavy sexual innuendo—which is ridiculous, but typical—and though Trini can certainly take a joke, she doesn't want to risk Kim being made uncomfortable.

Because there's a large part of Trini that's still afraid of being seen as the Predatory Gay kid, which is... unfortunate and completely ridiculous, given queer-related topics as a whole are one of the only areas where the wizarding world is wildly ahead of modern muggle society.

So she certainly knows that kids raised in magical families couldn't care less about her sexuality, but that type of self-conscious internalised shit is hard to shake. And Summer's comment wouldn't have outed her by any means, but until Trini says it to Kim explicitly, she finds herself wanting to steer clear of the subject.

Kim's mask drops as quickly as it lifted into place, and she sends a smile at Summer, Chip, and Gia. "Understandable. I wonder if you could get a hold of one of those tiny, child-size helmets too?"

"I swear to god," Trini mumbles.

"Oh, that's brilliant," Summer chirps, looking over to Gia. "We should add that to the shopping list." Gia gives a little salute, grinning, and Summer strides over to them. "Supper now, then — all this child-rearing's made me hungry."

"It's hard work," Kim says, nodding seriously then turning to Trini with a twinkle in her eye.

Trini just glares back.

"See you two in a moment?" Jason asks, smiling.

And with Jason, Billy, Zack, and Kim all looking at Trini, Summer waves to get her attention and mouths, "Have fun!" behind their backs, looking Kim up and down with suggestive eyes and waggling her eyebrows as she disappears with Gia and Chip into the Great Hall.

Trini pictures jinxing Summer's eyebrows to grow together and feels slightly better.

"Yeah," Kim answers, turning to Jason and smiling softly. With that the boys depart, and Trini and Kim are left there, standing between the doors to the Great Hall and the door to the basement as scattered groups of students make their way in to supper.

"Can't I just do it?" Trini tries. But as soon as Kim looks back at her, eyebrow quirked, she knows she's already lost this one.

"No."

Trini sighs heavily in reply, and Kim starts to lead the way away from supper and across the Entrance Hall. They enter a deserted corridor and walk for a little bit, soon finding themselves in an empty, unused classroom.

Kim waves her wand to ignite the lamps, and Trini looks about curiously—the furniture is arranged in a haphazard way, like it gets moved around and put back often. She's never been in here before, but that's not entirely unusual, even considering all of her time spent at Hogwarts so far. Given the sheer size of the castle, it's safe to say that she hasn't seen the vast majority of the place.

And she's not even counting the dungeons, which are a whole other thing entirely.

Kim swings her rucksack off her back and sits, rifling through it for a moment before producing a little lime green metal box and placing it on the large desk beside her. She turns and looks up at Trini, who's still standing, and gives her a soft smile. "I don't bite, you know."

Trini sighs a little and smiles back, rolling her eyes good-naturedly. "Where do you want me?"

"Next to me."

"Okay."

She sits and Kim scoots her chair right up to her, fitting their knees together, then swings the small wood writing desk up and out from its place beside Trini's armrest so that it separates them. With another warm smile, she gestures for Trini to hold out her arm. "Let's see it, then."

Trini does as Kim asks, holding her arm out gingerly and resting her elbow on the creaky writing desk. Kim peers down at it curiously, not touching it, and hums. "I'm going to have to cut your sleeve away, but we can repair it afterwards, okay?"

"Okay."

Kim nods and looks around the room for a moment, squinting, then seems to find what she's looking for. With a wave of her wand she brings a desk lamp floating over and places it right at the edge of the desk next to them. Once it's ignited it throws Trini's arm into even better light, and seemingly satisfied, Kim taps her wand to her left hand, mutters a spell, then does the same to her right.

"Sterilising them," she explains, when she notices Trini watching.

She starts to work then, and with a gentleness that almost makes Trini blush—the level of consideration Kim's showing feeling _intimate_ , somehow. And it's... not because Trini's touch-starved, she knows. Sincerely.

Because she tends to keep to herself when she doesn't know someone, sure, but when it comes to people she's fond of, Trini's way of expressing affection is almost entirely physical.

So no, that's not it. It's more that Kim's touching her with so much _care_ that Trini wonders if this is normal behaviour for her. She's certainly never seen this side of Kim; it's incredibly endearing.

Kim cuts the sleeve of Trini's robes away and carefully starts to clean the burn with a warm wet cloth that she's smeared with a silvery-green balm. It smells faintly minty, and Trini sighs lightly despite the pain, finding something like a tingling feeling erupting at the back of her head as Kim works.

After a minute experiencing the sensation she's beginning to wonder if she's breathing the smell of the balm in too deeply when Kim starts to hum absentmindedly, voice low, melodic—something that seems to vibrate through Trini's chest. And with only a couple feet of space between them, she could swear it carries right into her bones.

It also _intensifies_ the tingling, like someone's pouring a soft stream of sand from a tiny bottle onto her bare skin, right onto the base of her neck, where it proceeds to trickle down her spine.

And the corner of her mouth ticks up when she recognises the song Kim's humming — she's changed the key, but if Trini's proud of anything, it's her good musical ear. "That song breaks my heart," she breathes, and Kim doesn't look up, but a small smile appears on her face as well.

"Sorry," Kim mutters, blinking a couple times rapidly like she's coming out of a daze. "I know it seems like a downright lie, but I don't realise I'm doing that half the time."

Trini shakes her head. "No, it's... nice. Calming."

"You seem quite calm as it stands."

"Because _someone_ was humming."

Kim smiles and laughs lightly. "Well, I feel self-conscious now."

"You were just doing it a moment ago!" Trini says, voice teasing. "I was here then just as much as I am now."

Kim runs her tongue along one side of her upper teeth, mouth half-open in that slightly-flustered-yet-somehow-charming smile. She continues to tend to Trini's arm in silence for a few more moments then frowns. "Okay, are you super certain you don't want to go to the hospital wing?"

Trini mimics her expression, furrowing her brow. "Why? It's not that bad."

Kim gives her a deadpan kind of look. "Okay, one: you can cool it with being nonchalant, I _know_ it's painful. Two: because parts of your robes—and I have no idea why the school doesn't require them to be _fireproof_ , for fuck's sake—have stuck to your skin in a few places. That can be fixed one of two ways: either by Madam Pomfrey with a couple good painkilling potions thrown in the mix, or by me with no access to that crap."

Trini smiles, hoping her bashfulness at being called out isn't coming through on her face. "Honest, whatever you put on it helped a bit already. As for the nonchalance... I'm _trying_ not to be a baby. It's really not that bad."

Kim hums, still giving her a stern—albeit slightly playful, now—look. "If you're good at blocking it out, lovely. But if you're being a dishonest little shit—"

"Wow, rude," Trini interjects, scoffing.

"...you don't have to pretend with me," Kim continues insistently, voice getting softer. "At least not while we're in this room. I need you to tell me what you're feeling — if I do something that hurts I _need_ to know. Deal?"

Trini tips her head forward. "Yeah." She pauses, meeting Kim's eyes. "But are _you_ cool to do this? I'm sure you're hungry and I don't want to pressure you into anything you don't feel comfortable doing—"

"Trini."

Trini blinks. "Er, yes?"

Kim shakes her head, smiling softly. "I volunteered, remember? Though any claim I had to handling this quickly is out the window. If you're alright to have me do it, it's going to take a little while longer."

"I'm okay with that if you are," Trini says quietly.

Kim nods. "Alright. And for the record, it should still heal the same way whether Pomfrey or I do it. It's just the time it'll take to clean it that'll be different."

Trini inclines her head, then tilts it to the side. Regards Kim for a few seconds before she asks, "How did you learn to do this?"

Kim starts to work again, grabbing another cloth from her little first aid kit—which Trini's now heavily suspecting is charmed to be larger on the inside than it seems on the outside—and wetting it by poking it with her wand and muttering a spell. "My mum's a Healer at St. Mungo's," she explains, putting the cloth aside and taking a new, smaller tin out. "She's taught me some basic stuff. Nothing too crazy, but it's handy to know..."

Unscrewing the cap from the tin to reveal a clear potion with the consistency of a fibre paste, Kim takes some on her finger and dabs it onto all the areas where there's still black fabric sticking to Trini's angry-looking, inflamed skin. It takes a couple minutes, and she starts to hum the same song again as she works, much to Trini's delight.

She's learned now, though. No drawing attention to it.

And the burn certainly hurts, a _lot_ , but Kim's still being so gentle that she could very well not be touching it at all. Trini tips her head a little, watching and listening.

She doesn't realise she's smiling until Kim looks up at her and does a double take before she gives a tiny, shy smile back. "What?" she asks, quirking an eyebrow playfully.

"Nothing," Trini mutters, still holding her gaze. After another moment, though, she changes her mind. "Just... thank you for being so gentle. I'm realising this would have been much more painful if I tried to do it myself."

Kim seems pleasantly surprised. "Yeah, of course." She pauses, taking a deep breath in and out. "Alright — have to leave this stuff on for a few minutes. It'll make it easy for me to remove all the rubbish without hurting your skin."

Trini nods, shifting a bit in her chair and letting her eyes flutter closed. And it feels strange, here with Kim—the lamps around them are giving off a kind of dim light, and it's quiet. Nobody else has entered the corridor outside their classroom since they arrived.

It's not strange in a bad way, though. Just... different. Like being stuck inside during a snowstorm; where everything has ground to a halt outside and time suddenly exists nowhere but where you are.

Like the world's stopped and her and Kim have gotten off the carousel for a moment. Left it paused.

Trini starts humming quietly then, the same song Kim was before—['Silver Springs'](https://open.spotify.com/track/4nZi6XNe36Ut4Nij3IQ1yC?si=Si68RQouQdaN4xMIyselfw) by Fleetwood Mac—trying to keep herself awake in the odd kind of daze she's experiencing. And even with her eyes closed, she could swear Kim's smiling when she says, "Wouldn't have guessed, you fancying music like that."

"Music like what?" Trini replies, opening one eye goofily and quirking a brow. "Heartbreaking? Soft and earth-shattering at once?"

Kim tilts her head a little. "...Yes?" she says, squinting. A small grin growing on her face.

Trini laughs quietly. "Right back at you. It's going to be stuck in my head now, so thanks for that."

Kim shrugs. "Not my fault. I'm not even sure how it got into mine, given I haven't heard it in a while." She peers at Trini's arm and regards the formerly clear globs of potion, which have now turned solid white. With a satisfied nod, she gestures to it. "Okay team, we're cooked."

"Lovely," Trini deadpans, bewildered at Kim's choice of words. Observes Kim curiously as she picks up the clean cloth and starts to wipe the potion away. "You're sort of weird, you know that?"

Kim smiles, not looking up from Trini's arm. "So I've been told."

She cleans it, removing the bits of fabric along with the potion and continuing to hum to herself. And when she starts applying an orange paste to it, Trini audibly sighs at how it feels—numbing and cool, counteracting the burn.

"Nearly there," Kim says once she's finished, cleaning off her hands and spelling the cloth clean. "Bandage then we're home free."

"Thank you, Kim."

"Yeah, no problem."

Another minute and there's a bright white bandage covering most of Trini's right forearm. It feels infinitely better, and she smiles as Kim starts to pack her medical supplies up.

.

October continues to pass in a quick fashion, with Trini finding her weeks busier than she's used to, even with the Inter-House Cup not running.

Because she has her Quidditch team and her roommates, who she's around more than anyone else, and she has her classes and homework, but the addition of pick-up Quidditch matches has brought a whole new kind of colour to it all—specifically via the four idiots who she's playing said matches with two or three times a week.

And Trini can't put her finger on why she finds herself glancing at the Gryffindor or Ravenclaw tables at mealtimes, now, searching;

Because try as she might, she can't pin down just _what_ it is about Jason that makes him so much different than some of the other pretty boys she's known, the ones with lazy smiles and hair that seemed to fall perfectly no matter if it was messed up or in place, who could be unkind and careless with their words. Because he doesn't have an aura of threat that swirls around him, unrealised until it isn't — no, his hands are warm, his eyes are soft. His voice is always a question even if his words are not. Is he saying the right thing? Can he do something to be better? Is he making the best decisions for everyone?

He acts in a way that suggests a shift, a wheel that's still spinning with the urgent, frenzied force of something that happened before. An apology, now, for a wrong choice sometime in the past, one that still whispers in his ear, reminds him to stay the course, to pick the right door this time. He is so much, so vast, and maybe it's because there's such a humanity in regret—in the genuine and authentic person that can emerge out of it, so much more willing to skip the bullshit and go straight to the heart of _everything_ —that Trini finds herself drawn to him, so very unexpectedly;

And there is no concrete reason for the fierce kind of kinship she feels with Billy, a fondness there for him that she rarely has for anyone; like listening to someone you love humming a slow song on a quiet autumn night, with a comfortable house around you and cold rain falling gently outside — it's a safety, a wrap-you-up in it kind of warmth that's so inexplicable, and she's known him the longest out of them all but she's only just starting to see glimpses of something dancing and bright.

Because she's beginning to realise there's a latent, Billy-shaped foundation that's built up in her consciousness already; part of a familiarity that comes from knowing someone for years but never going too deep, never befriending them on a level that necessitates time spent beyond a weekly lesson or two sat next to each other. Now, she has an ease with him that feels automatic, so much different yet entirely the same as working next to him every week;

Then there's Kim, who's such a wildcard in all of this. Who causes little flutters of something like happiness in Trini's stomach that she's unable to explain with words, incapable of defining. And she can't seem to figure out why she finds everything Kim does so _fascinating_ , to an almost ludicrous degree, like Trini's on the shore of a new planet with nothing but wonder and discovery on the horizon; and she wants to map it all, draw it all in a wild urge that has her aching to paint something, to make art like she used to in effort not to tame any of it, exactly, but to _try_ and document every single frame, from a silly Quaffle toss Kim makes during a game to that _thing_ she does when she opens her mouth to say something then closes it again. It's all somehow endearing—even that mischievous, _annoying_ twinkle in her eyes that appears when she trades witty banter back and forth with Trini like it's going out of style.

And what are the paint colours she would use, anyway? Could any of them really do Kim justice? Or does Trini need something else—music, maybe, or movement, somehow—to even begin to express it all, to depict every curve and line and shadow? Will she spend her life trying to find _something_ that will help her with all of this, help get Kim out of her mind and away from her senses for just one fucking moment, to a place where Trini can put her down and step back so she can finally think clearly — process things without a stray thought about Kim breezing through her mind and causing her stomach to flip over, a sudden flash of colours that demand to be recognised; everything short-circuiting and starting up again, wiping her progress;

At the base of it all is Zack, of course. That idiot wheedled his way into her heart and mind a long time ago, it seems now, when he was not much more than a familiarity, a neighbour in a hospital wing bed; the both of them acknowledging each other with little nods here and there in the corridors that said, ' _I see you_ ' in a mutually respectful (yet cocky, as it always had to be with them) kind of way.

Now, he's the most solid thing in her field of vision through all of this, like something to focus on in the blurring kind of unsteadiness brought about by the lurching bond that's sprung up and growing between the five of them, reaching like vines and sprouting flowers that promise something else, something sweeter if only given time and care.

So no, Trini can't put her finger on any of it. She's in uncharted waters without a paddle, trying to navigate and resist giving in to the familiar urge to jump ship.

At the very least, she owes it to herself to explore a little.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'awake' by folly & the hunter. 
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO HELLO! have our girls interacting one on one in a Soft Scenario! this happens on a friday evening--end of last chapter was two days ago, on wednesday. but yes. you've likely already noticed that kim has a tendency to hum to herself in a wide variety of situations, but trini did not know this! she is delighted!
> 
> as for trini's thoughts about her sexuality -- she's a bit of a unique case, because though she has two magical parents (and the magical community is canonically Super Cool with Gay Shit/lgbtq+ stuff generally), her upbringing was not at all like kim and jason's, for example. she was raised in a much more muggle environment! immersed! she was involved in muggle sports and communities etc, and magic was more of a cool sidenote in her life than the main focus? 
> 
> for kim and jason it was the opposite--they were raised in the magical community and their muggle schooling was the outlier. so though trini's dad is lovely and she herself is cool with it, she's likely had to deal with Not Cool societal opinions more often and is therefore a tad bit cautious.
> 
> now, note!!! this is not a big deal in the context of this fic and won't be a Big Thing in the future--there are no Being LGBTQ+ Is Tragic storylines on the way. we have enough of those in media, imo. just wanted to acknowledge one of the interesting differences between muggle/magical society as it relates to our kids and their character development!
> 
> also! trini's little introspection at the end has a whole lot to do with how _pulled_ she feels towards our other four main kids. because in the past, all of her close relationships (family, roommates, and quidditch team specifically) have grown out of naturally close proximity. for trini, relationships develop over time with people you spend a lot of time with. and this is the case for humans generally, of course!
> 
> but zack was the first person who she befriended at hogwarts outside of those naturally-formed social spheres (again, they met in the hospital wing as neighbours!), and that was entirely because HE was the one approaching her at the beginning. they get along, of course, so trini soon began reciprocating. but she has next to no experience RE clicking with people and personally seeking out their company, if that makes sense? wanting to be friends with people who she might not naturally be around all of the time is new! and she is very ???
> 
> our girl is young and still learning! they all are! 
> 
> \---
> 
> so yes! coming to you live from the other side of midterms! hope everyone's doing splendidly. appreciate the well wishes on the exams and such. happy to be donezo, though my brain is something of a mush currently. if this authors note is incomprehensible i cannot be held responsible.
> 
> thanks so much for reading and for your comments! knowing people are enjoying this thing warms my heart a whole lot!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> until next time, and take care of yourselves!


	17. Landing Cliffs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/5tigkMHCUbLCxRTrlozt6F?si=muSDSotpT6yhJZgkwvgaVQ). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Fast-forward to the following Tuesday and Trini is sending a _perfectly_ aimed Bludger peeling at Jason, a smug smirk plastered on her face, and Kim has to resist the urge to fall off her broom at the sheer wave of awe that seems to buffet her from every direction.

Because, _wow_.

Trini sees more of the pitch in a quick glance than Kim does even after careful observation; her vision is wide, whole-picture, where Kim's is simmered down and moment-to-moment, like life through a periscope. Or a horse galloping _really_ fast, wearing blinders.

And that works perfectly for a Chaser, to be sure. Part of the reason why Kim's so _good_ at it is because she throws herself into things with limited hesitation, acting almost purely on instinct.

But it still baffles her, seeing someone like Trini with a Quidditch skill set that is completely outside of her own range. It's impressive, fascinating, and Trini does it with such a confidence—with that competitive streak colouring every decision she makes on the pitch, so perfectly lined up like a giant chess game, always five moves ahead...

_Merlin. Is it hot, suddenly?_

Streaking through the air with the Quaffle under her arm, only Zack between her and the goalposts, Kim averts her eyes from Trini and notes the weather hasn't changed. It's still a fairly bland, overcast evening.

Her brow furrows. She certainly feels strange—a little dazed, temperature seems to be skyrocketing, mouth a bit dry—maybe she's falling ill?

Zack comes shooting straight at her, clearly trying to get her to alter course, to slow down just enough so that Billy (who Kim can sense trailing slightly behind her) can catch up and help defend.

A game of chicken, though? She's here for it.

So she continues ahead like he isn't even there, the space between them closing rapidly before she remembers that this is a scrimmage match, and she doesn't want to _hurt_ him, by any means.

Kim dives down and Zack pulls up at the exact same time—on the same wavelength, apparently—and Trini comes in a few feet away, flanking on her left.

"You should've hit him!" Trini yells, that cocky _smirk_ present on her face that Kim isn't sure if she loves or hates at this stage, due to how it's making her stomach somersault in a way similar to how it felt when she abruptly went into a dive moments ago.

And Trini gives her a significant look when Billy appears at Kim's right shoulder, experience telling them both that his reach will be enough to block any shot she takes.

Within a heartbeat Kim flips the Quaffle to her easily and Trini swipes it out of the air, Beater's bat switched to her off-hand. Billy follows the ball to defend her instead, with all of them nearly at the goalposts now, but Trini quickly fakes up then lobs the Quaffle right back to Kim, managing to get it under his broom with some difficulty, knowing he'll block it if she tries to go over.

It's a good pass despite the tricky angle but Kim still has to lunge out to grab it, going into a barrel roll that's probably unnecessary. But she would rather look a bit overzealous than miss the catch; credibility is important to keep up, after all. She has her pride to consider.

And impressing Trini _might_ be a factor in there, too, though Kim's not entirely sure why that's even in her sights at this point.

Kim weighs the ball a bit in her hand to adjust her grip, and with a sure shot through the centre hoop a moment later she scores, putting her and Trini up two over the boys.

They play like that for an hour and a half or so, with Kim finding herself thrown off-balance by Trini repeatedly (and only figuratively today, given they're on the same team), just like every other time they've all played together. Because something about Trini is so unbridled when she plays, so completely bare—every emotion, thought, calculation showing across her face like an advert billboard in Piccadilly Circus. It's such a stark contrast to her day-to-day: the stoic, oft expressionless look.

Through seeing her like this, Kim has come to the conclusion that Trini's apparent indifference off the pitch is almost entirely a façade. It's a deduction she certainly could not have come to at this stage had they not been playing together, to be sure; as a result, she feels like she knows a secret of Trini's that she shouldn't.

And that's not to say Trini's fake in any sense of the word. More guarded, more protective of herself.

Because Kim can play that hand, too—can act cool and unaffected in order to keep herself less accessible. She did it for years. But between her own lived experience and Billy's advice on the matter, she knows that pushing Trini too hard by being overly forward or enthusiastic might cause her to shut down (at least until Kim's started to gain her trust). And Trini is evidently very practised at keeping other people at an arm's length, so Kim's not sure how long that trust will take to build.

But whether it's a short time or (more likely) not, she finds herself not worried or impatient in the slightest. She wants to get to know Trini, after all—she has since the very first day they spoke. This isn't a race, and she will make the effort.

So she's trying to go slow with it, to bite back the urge to go ninety percent of the way and hope that Trini will come the other ten. Kim has to act like a socially conventional human being and wait in the middle; maybe toe the line every once and a while. And it's still a bit scary because she can't entirely tell if Trini even _likes_ her as a person or not—a feeling certainly exacerbated by her own insecurities—but she's trying.

Whether she gets anywhere with this, though, is another question entirely.

.

The next day, their joint free period finds the five of them out in the courtyard instead of their regular spot in the library.

"Mate, we had a good team last year," Trini's saying to Zack, voice betraying her tiredness. "Stronger than Ravenclaw's, at least. More than able to compete with them on the pitch that day. It was hard for both sides to score—before they caught the Snitch, we were tied twenty-twenty."

Trini sighs then continues, running her fingers lightly through the lush grass of the courtyard they're all sat in, "The only reason everyone was saying we were—" she makes quotes in the air, " _flattened_ by Ravenclaw is because Cedric wouldn't get his head out of his arse and stop staring at their pretty Seeker. She literally grabbed the Snitch from five feet above his head within the first _ten minutes_ of play, while he was sitting there, probably making some stupid flirty remark and ogling her like she was the sun. He's my Captain and I love him, I really do, and he's a brilliant Seeker, but he cost us that match."

Zack tips into her shoulder teasingly. "'Pretty Seeker' eh?"

Trini glares at him then rolls her eyes. "Come on. That's not a Trini-Is-A-Big-Gay thing — It's Cho Chang. I have eyes."

Her gaze is drawn to Kim then, who, from her place on Jason's left has just turned away from the group and become very invested in digging through the depths of her rucksack.

Trini pokes Zack in the ribs. "Besides, it was _you_ who was going on about her the day we met in the hospital wing. What was it you said to her again?"

Jason holds up his hand then spins around and flops onto his back in the cool grass, using his Transfiguration textbook as a pillow and positioning his head in the middle of their little study circle. Beginning to laugh lightly at a memory, he tips his head to look at Trini and recounts, "Context, 'cause I'm not sure if you know this part: earlier that day, me, Zack and some other Gryffindors went with Billy to one of the Ravenclaws open group tutoring things."

His grin starts to grow into something more devlish. "And the bloke running it told each of us to partner up with an older student, right... so this knob walks right up to Cho and goes, 'Hey, I'm Zack. Want to make some magic together?'"

At once Trini, Jason, and Zack all start cackling. Kim turns back towards the group and groans good-naturedly, quirking her eyebrow at all of them as she fidgets with her necklace gently.

Trini feels her laughter turning into a goofy smile as she watches Billy lay down and copy Jason, positioning their heads beside each other and forming a 'V' with their bodies. Billy yawns and addresses the sky, "Then she charmed his shoelaces to tie together after she very politely declined his offer. Which, as you know, Trini, is why he was in the hospital wing with a concussion."

Huffing out another laugh, Trini nods. "Yeah, I remember that part." She pauses, shrugging. "In all fairness, her coming to visit and apologising was cool. Felt really bad."

Turning back to Zack, she smirks. "Girl after my own heart with that tripping you up shit though."

"I'm with you there," Jason chimes, smiling.

Zack scoffs and goes into a light sing-song, "She spent way more time cooing at you over your broken wrist than she did apologising to me, T."

Trini smirks. "Because I'm a delight, Z. She's been hit by a stray Bludger here and there too and could relate, is all."

"Suuure," Zack mutters, giving her a wink. "Whatever you say."

It's then that Kim abruptly throws herself onto the grass next to Jason with a small huff, her business rifling around in her bag seemingly forgotten. Zack follows suit beside her, and Trini completes the set.

As the five of them lay there together in the courtyard, staring up at the autumn sky, Trini can't help but think about how happy she feels. Within the last month, she's somehow managed to surround herself with a new group of people who feel... _right_. Who make her comfortable.

And she just _came out_ —as casually as she could muster without her voice shaking—and the world didn't end. Jason gave her a little supportive joke, Billy kept going as usual, Zack already knew, and Kim hasn't made to move ten feet away from her or anything. All good news.

Billy tips his head towards Kim. "Did you find what you were looking for, Kim? Do you want to borrow a quill? Jason has extras in his bag."

Kim shakes her head lightly, her hair bobbing in the grass. Her voice sounds distant when she answers, "No, Billy, I'm good thanks."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'landing cliffs' by explosions in the sky. bonus! listen to 'the ecstatics' off the same album and you'll be transported back to a lovely heartwarming scene in a CERTAIN 2017 POWER RANGERS FILM.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO! here we are a bit early.
> 
> featuring: kim feeling flustered around trini and being Very Unsure as to what's going on. she has her suspicions of course, but reminder that these kids are still figuring all of this Life Stuff out! they're only in fourth year at hogwarts! for a real life translation, as per england's system they'd be year 10 age. north american schools: grade 9/freshman year. 
> 
> and yes, kim has been blatantly flirting—at least by regular people standards (read: trini is an oblivious gay)—with trini already of course. but as you will discover over time, kimberly ann hart _will_ flirt with anything (hot) that moves. and fun future fic fact, a secondary character says exactly this about 17-year-old kim down the line! aka this particular kim behaviour only GETS WORSE WITH TIME.
> 
> which MEANS that while kim has a tendency to project confidence by bodily yeeting her personality into rooms before she enters, she really doesn't have much experience with _real_ attraction. cause again, she's young. see next chapter for some of her thoughts on this.
> 
> (for the record, I'm kind of going on JKRs timeline when it comes to talking about CRUSHES AND ATTRACTION ETC! everyone is different, of course, but in goblet of fire aka year 4 we see harry really starting to be like 'OH SUP' at cho, and that weird romantic tension between ron/hermione starts. hermione/krum canonically SMOOCH too! so yes. good times!)
> 
> also!!! witness our girl trini COME OUT! super chill, of course. just dropping that info in there. the sky didn't fall. and she knew it wouldn't, but there's always that little bit of apprehension! 
> 
> you also hear about how trini and zack met as two strangers who happened to be hospital wing neighbours. of course, zack was the one who started talking to trini and has not stopped since.
> 
> so yes. as has been the case a few times recently, this is a short update so I've put the next one up. originally these two were in the same chapter, but I separated them for Reasons.
> 
> HOPE YOU'RE ALL HAVING A GOOD START TO THE WEEKEND! <3


	18. Paint the Silence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/2YNG6LgbDOkfAQNK0wXTpy?si=cPo4PqpGSmyAs5hk85O4Pw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

On the morning of the twentieth of October, two very un-Hufflepuff groups of kids can be found squished together shoulder-to-shoulder, sitting and standing, at the end of the Hufflepuff House table. Sat one side is Jason, with the Gryffindor table at his back and surrounded by a hearty group of his Housemates, and on the other is Tommy, with an equally large band of rowdy Slytherins surrounding her.

Between them is a great, rectangular three-tiered cake: chocolate and vanilla inside with rainbow frosting and sprinkles on the outside. It boasts two giant messages written in an icing that changes colour every few seconds: 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY JASON' on one side and 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOMMY' on the other.

Each of them sits in front of their respective message, beaming faces dancing with flickering, happy light as candles erupting like sparkler fireworks crackle merrily atop the cake. And Kim is there in the middle, sat right _on top_ of the table cross-legged with the cake a little ways in front of her. Holding one of their hands apiece.

Because she couldn't stomach standing on one side over the other, even though she's well aware neither of them would be offended.

She's too sentimental for that, so here she sits.

Standing on the outskirts of the Slytherin group a few feet away is Trini, facing Kim and leaning onto the table with her elbow, smiling with a kind of true, unmasked warmth that Kim's rarely seen her openly display outside of pick-up matches. And she seems content to watch the revelry from the outside, removed a bit even though they're all sitting at _her_ House table.

And it's because of Trini that they're here at all, of course, using what she described as her 'Quidditch clout' to secure her House's approval to commandeer a part of their table for this particular moment. Her Quidditch Captain, Cedric Diggory, is sat nearby in case any of the Hufflepuffs try to give them a hard time.

Slytherin and Gryffindor have quite the hefty rivalry, of course—after some discussion they all figured neutral ground would be best. And knowing that they certainly wouldn't be able to eat the entirety of the _massive_ cake by themselves, Kim promised the Hufflepuffs free reign of it afterwards.

She makes another mental note to bring a piece over to Diggory as soon as they start handing them out.

Everyone is singing to Tommy and Jason loudly, serenading them with a boisterous, good-naturedly competing song from both sides, as Gryffindors and Slytherins were inevitably bound to do. And Kim isn't worried about the noise, given she has express permission from Professor McGonagall for this little celebration.

She chances a look up at the staff table then, where, true to form, Professor McGonagall is sat eating her breakfast with the _Daily Prophet_ propped up in front of her. Seemingly unable to hear the proper _ruckus_ coming from their group.

Kim smiles.

" _...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR—_ "

The two sides say their respective names at once: the Gryffindors shouting, "JASON!" at the Slytherins with bright smiles on their faces as the Slytherins sing, "TOMMY!" equally as loudly, only an easy happiness present among them, with some leaning over the table to get more into the other side's faces in jest.

And Billy looks like he thought this out in length beforehand, choosing to simply point between the two of them instead of saying a name, while Zack's in on the Gryffindor side _yelling_ , and Trini's watching it all from her spot, that soft smile never fading from her face.

"... _HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!_ " they all finish together, erupting in applause and cheers as Tommy and Jason look at each other before blowing out their candles in unison.

The two of them stand up and do a wild slap of a high-five over the cake, each still holding one of Kim's hands. They dip to kiss her on the temples at the same time, each thanking her before pulling back. She squeezes their hands and drops them, hopping off the table with Tommy's help before she steps back to watch them slice the cake up.

Once Tommy hands Kim a piece, she weaves around the Slytherins, walking down the table and closer to the centre of the Great Hall to find Trini talking to Emma Goodall, one of Tommy's roommates. And their body language is relaxed, easy, like they know each other.

If they do, it's news to Kim.

Trini sees her approach over Emma's shoulder and gives a little upwards jerk of the head, which Kim returns. Emma follows Trini's eyes and turns around.

"Thanks for helping with all of this," Kim says, nodding at Emma.

Emma gives her a genuine smile. "Of course. And you'll be at the party in the common room tonight, right? Or am I going to have to chase you down?"

Kim rocks on her feet a little. "No, I'll be there. Not really my scene but for her, I'll go anywhere."

Trini's head tips to the side, so slightly that she surely doesn't even realise she's doing it, but the movement is just enough to draw Kim's gaze. She glances at her and smiles, finding Trini's face the same it was a moment ago—relaxed, almost impassive except for the warmth in her eyes.

"Good," Emma replies, pivoting to put her hand on Trini's shoulder gently, squeezing once. "See you, Trini," she says, voice light.

Trini gives her a casual raise of the hand in goodbye, still so much more open than Kim's seen her in most of the time they've known each other. And with that, Emma smiles again at Kim as she goes to move past her and towards the cake.

Kim regards Trini curiously. "Didn't realise you two knew each other," she says, and there's a tiny, uncalled-for note of accusation that sneaks into her voice, surprising even her. She blinks and arranges her face in what she hopes is a warmer look, relaxes her shoulders.

_That was odd._

But Trini doesn't seem to notice. "Yeah, we went to the World Cup together."

Kim waits for any further explanation but Trini doesn't give it, so she just nods and switches tack, her voice becoming a bit more automatic, "Thank you for all of this — the table, the cake..."

Trini waves her off. "Anytime."

Kim notes the green and red confetti currently shooting out from little candied spouts that have appeared on top of the cake, erupting into the air and disappearing as it falls. "And was this—" she gestures to it, holding a hand out, where some falls then vanishes, "your doing, then?"

"Nah," Trini answers, looking up at it as well, the colours reflecting in her eyes. "Asked the house elves to surprise me. Do something festive."

Kim nods and leans between one of Tommy's friends and Trini to get to the table—certainly, she could have just gone behind Trini, but she likes her route better—to catch Cedric's eye, where he's sitting on the other side.

"Diggory," Kim chirps, voice a bit harder on account of being familiar with him from the IHC, but there's kindness in her eyes as she looks down at him. He glances up from his _Daily Prophet_ , raising his eyebrows a little at her in acknowledgement.

Kim brings her cheeky Chaser tone into her voice like injecting a dye, "I would normally thank you for all of this by way of flattening you into the pitch—more gently than usual, to be sure—but since we won't have the opportunity this year, this'll have to suffice." She raises the cake into the air a bit in indication and extends her hand across the table to him.

He accepts it and blinks at Kim, regarding her for a moment with a calculating light in his eyes, then turns to Trini quizzically. "Remind me, this is the one you _like_ , correct?"

Kim tries to keep the surprise off her face, but Trini just sighs. "Some days."

"Huh," he says, tone full smart-arse as well, holding Kim's gaze now with a toothy smile. "Well, Hart, if that _was_ a thank you, then you're welcome. Anything for Small, here."

And to Kim's surprise there's no protest from Trini at the nickname—on the contrary, she looks at him with an incredible fondness in her eyes. They're undoubtedly close, Kim decides, based on how he's looking back at her.

She finds she has to tear her eyes away from just... watching Trini and this rare display of affection, so different than her usual expressions that Kim feels a bit stunned, like she's been smacked in the face by something soft; a pillow maybe. It ignites a kind of pleasantly bewildered feeling in her chest, a happy surprise at the sensation that pulls her to throw herself into the fray of it all, to be the cause of that _look_ to manifest in Trini's eyes.

Forcing herself to stop staring at Trini—who luckily hasn't noticed—Kim gives Cedric another little nod which he returns. With that, she steps back, leaving him to continue reading his paper. And Trini pushes herself off where she was leaning against the table, tilting upward to a proper standing position, looking around as if to check if she's forgetting anything.

Kim furrows her brow. "You're leaving? No cake?"

"Not all of us have time to spare," Trini replies airily. "I left my stuff in my dorm in favour of carrying the cake up here."

Kim can't help but smile. "You know, you're kind of considerate when you're not pretending to be a closed book all of the time," she says, more of a blurt-out than anything, feeling more on solid ground with Trini due to the easy comfort brought on by the happiness around them, the confetti still falling, the tiniest remnant of that earlier look still in her eyes.

Trini glances over at Tommy and Jason then back at Kim. Shrugs. "I'm a sucker for celebrations like this. Chalk it up to growing up in a big family, I guess." She pauses, quirking an eyebrow—an expression, despite the rest of her face being impassive, that Kim's beginning to recognise as playful, almost. "I _do_ have a heart, you know."

"Shocker, really," Kim chimes, grinning.

Trini inclines her head. "Have to keep up appearances, don't I? But there are moments like this that are exceptions. Something you're no doubt familiar with."

"Am I supposed to know what that means?"

Trini shrugs, already starting to move past. There's a solid, smooth pause as Kim pivots anti-clockwise to follow her with her eyes.

"I mean you look good today," Trini says softly, stopping a couple feet away with her back to Kim now, voice even and sure. Head turned to the side, bowed slightly, only looking at Kim out of the corner of her eye. "Just..." she falters a little, pausing again for a beat; watching everyone celebrating, still not looking at Kim, only offering her side profile, "amongst all of this. Happiness in people you love makes you happy, and it's easy to see."

Kim blinks, not even having time to process her words—let alone respond—before Trini's got her back to her fully again, walking away from her and giving a lazy tilt of her hand in goodbye. "See you later, Kim."

And Kim doesn't move from where she's stood as she watches Trini leave the Great Hall, too pleasantly surprised at Trini's candor, at how, between her words Kim could hear something deeper: ' _I'm glad to see you enjoying yourself like this_ '.

She turns back to the revelry, walking around the table to Jason's side, where she's handed a slice of cake by Zack. Considers just how she knew that Trini was saying _more_ , was communicating something beyond what her words conveyed.

It's like she's slowly turning a wireless dial, flicking through radio stations, getting closer and closer to whatever frequency Trini is on. And there seems to be a tiny Trini Translator forming in her mind, helping her along in moments like this, giving her little bits of information that she inexplicably knows are correct.

She's learning Trini, slowly. And as she sits beside Jason and bops their shoulders together, watching everyone chatting happily around them—

As she carves off a little chunk of her cake with her fork, Kim smiles to herself.

.

"Jase, what does it take for you to... compliment someone when talking about them?" Kim asks, as they ascend the main staircase from the dungeons to the Entrance Hall with Zack on Friday evening. "Like, use a compliment as a descriptor? Do you refer to people like, 'that handsome guy' or 'that pretty girl' sparingly? Or is it something that's just a regular old identifier?"

Jason looks over at her, clearly confused. Zack is staring at her with the same expression.

She huffs then brings a hand to the side of her face, trying to organise her thoughts in order to express them more clearly. It's made harder due to the fact that _she's_ having a tough time with understanding her own mind recently—evidenced by how she's been trying to get her head around this for over a week (including the near-entirety of their double Potions lesson just now).

"Like, if you didn't know me, would you call me 'pretty' in passing?" Kim finally says to the both of them, cocking her head to the side as they climb the last stretch of stairs.

Jason doesn't miss a beat. "I'll call you anything you want me to, honey," he croons, in a ridiculous accent she knows he picked up from watching too many American Old Western films.

She smacks him lightly on the shoulder.

"Ow!"

"I'm serious!" she whines. Pauses. "Like, okay. I'm not trying to fish for compliments... just, if you lot saw any old good-looking person, would you call them fit? And then if you saw another, would you call them fit too? Or are like, complimenting adjectives only reserved for people who you actually kind of would consider dating?"

Jason gazes over at her as they walk through the doors and towards the smell of dinner wafting from the Great Hall. "K, I'm still not following. Do you mean like, does complimenting someone's appearance mean you're interested romantically? Or could be in theory?"

Kim nods slowly, though she herself isn't even sure that's what she's getting at.

Zack hums and pipes up, "I think that, yeah, by calling someone fit or handsome or whatever you're acknowledging that you think they're good-looking, obviously, but I don't think that necessarily means... like, 'Hey, I fancy you'. It doesn't have to be reserved for people you'd want to date. I reckon it's more casual than that."

The three of them cross the hall and sit at the very end of the Gryffindor table, and Kim's so lost in thought that she doesn't really notice. The only reason she _asked_ about any of this at all is because Trini called the Ravenclaw Seeker 'pretty' when the five of them were doing homework together last week.

And Kim is dwelling on it for some reason—she's not sure if it's because Trini is so difficult to read, or if she just wants to know _more_ about her, or if there's... something else there.

Because on the day that Kim and Trini first met after their Quidditch match last year, Trini called _her_ pretty—casually, of course, just a throwaway comment—but Kim smiled about it for days afterwards, despite not even knowing Trini at the time.

Up until recently she figured that her own happiness over that whole incident was because she was flattered at being complimented. But when Trini said that about another girl, it caused something unexpected and uncomfortable to flare up in Kim's chest. And when Trini voiced that she liked girls _romantically_ a moment later—which was news to Kim—it was like... game over. There was a figurative record scratch in her mind; she felt herself blush a little and turned away from the group in effort to hide it.

Because Kim's no stranger to the fact that where attraction is concerned, she seems to just fancy people on a more general level. To be sure, it was a bit of a shock when she found herself attracted to Amanda, of all people, a few years ago when they started to become closer as friends. Kim's sure she would never have actually _dated_ Amanda even if the chance arose, and she certainly never mentioned it to anyone, but the physical attraction was there undoubtedly.

She's found a contentedness in identifying as bisexual since then, making a kind of home within the word that feels right to her, but it's not a topic she ever discusses at length in her day-to-day life. It isn't a secret by any means, but there's no reason to shout it from the rooftops... right?

Jason and Tommy will certainly joke around with her about it, though they tend keep it between the three of them, and she talked with her mum about it last year—who was great—but otherwise, her sexuality really isn't anyone else's business.

For all intents and purposes, both her and Jason aren't publicly _out_. He's come to terms with it more recently, but it's still quite new for the both of them. Figuring it out doesn't have to be something that happens right away.

After all, it apparently takes a _lot_ for her to legitimately develop romantic feelings for a person. There just hasn't been anyone of interest for her to talk about.

There have only ever been two people in the past who she had a semblance of legitimate romantic feelings for: the first was Jason, when they were younger and barely spent a minute apart—those feelings had gone away a long time ago, obviously—and the second was Tommy, gone away too, now, and with Kim only realising the true nature of those feelings in hindsight, after coming to terms with the whole bisexual thing.

Both of them she's known since they were all in diapers, so she doesn't have experience with properly fancying someone _new_ , someone she barely knows; she's not familiar with the feeling in the slightest, which is why her own brain's fixation on Trini—and on that conversation out in the quad the other day—has been bothering her so much.

If she's developing feelings for Trini, that's just fine. But she's having a tough time differentiating between 'I quite like you and your personality and I want to be your friend' versus 'I would very much like to date you'.

In short, Kim's very confused. She intends to play it cool until she digs deeper and comes to some kind of conclusion, which seems to include asking the boys very vague questions about attraction in the process, all with the air of inquiring about the mating practices of an entirely different species. She doesn't know how to navigate any of this, and sure as hell can't classify her own feelings, but she's _definitely_ curious about Trini.

She wants to understand her better, and that's a start, at least.

Kim gestures with a green bean pinched between her thumb and forefinger. "So... you guys reckon complimenting someone like that is more of a throwaway thing?"

"I think it all depends on the person," Jason says, loading chicken legs onto his plate. "Some people are quicker to compliment while others are more reserved."

Zack nods from beside Jason, his gaze focused somewhere over Kim's shoulder. "Yeah. You know I tend to just say shit like that outright, innit. But someone like, say, either of these two—" he says, as Billy and Trini sit down beside Kim, "are a bit pickier when it comes to who they compliment."

"We're what now?" Trini chirps, slouching her cloak off and beginning to pour pumpkin juice into a glass. Her and Billy look chilled, given the late October nights are getting colder and they've just come from their Care of Magical Creatures lesson.

Kim widens her eyes slightly at Jason, who looks at her curiously but quickly gets the idea. He responds casually, "We were talking about how to tell what someone's actual intentions or feelings are towards you when they're hard to read, or when you don't know them. Like, if they compliment you in passing, are they being genuine, or is it a front, you know?"

He pauses briefly, taking a bite of chicken. "Zack's saying you two tend to be more sincere in that respect, or at least pickier with who you actually warm up to. Snape was going on tonight about poisons and antidotes and how people are untrustworthy and blah blah blah," he mutters, waving his drumstick around lazily for effect.

And Kim's got to hand it to him, that was a nice curve. She glances at Zack, who is inhaling a small mountain of potatoes smothered in gravy. If he noticed the subtle pull away from their actual conversation—and she's sure he probably did—he doesn't say anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'paint the silence' by south.
> 
> \---
> 
> hello again, all!
> 
> we've got around a week time jump between last chapter and this one. feat jason and tommy's birthday! in power rangers canon they're born on the same day, which I find SUPER LOVELY. in our story, he's a year older than she is for obvious reasons, given they're a school year apart. kim's born on valentines day, which makes her eight months older than tommy, both born in 1980. jason, the eldest, is born in '79 (along with our lord and saviour hermione jean granger, fun HP fact).
> 
> SOME FUN TRIMBERLY INTERACTION THIS CHAPTER! trini is perhaps getting a bit more familiar and comfortable with kim. a tad bit braver with her words, even. and kim is slowly learning how to interpret trini's scowling demeanour as a result. also, hello cedric! my SON.
> 
> not to mention that kim's finding trini evermore interesting to stare at these days. and she's getting to the bottom of the reason, it seems, but looks like we're gonna have to WAIT AND SEE HOW THIS GOES EH. 
> 
> & I hope you seasoned PR fans enjoyed our brief glimpse of emma. SWEET DARLING ANGEL!
> 
> but yes! thank you all so much, as always, for continuing to read this story. comments are super welcome and appreciated—tell me what you liked! scream about our ranger babies! do whatever! I'm incredibly grateful for all of the positive feedback and THANKS FOR STOPPING BY! 
> 
> until next time, and take care of yourselves! <3


	19. Flesh Without Blood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/2lu928pDKDPkCPKMXE6OHW). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.
> 
> NOW! AN UNORTHODOX REQUEST!!! if you could _PERHAPS_ have the above song in your head when the kids leave the library together and go down to supper, that would be swell. happens just past the middle of the chapter or so. 
> 
> cause if this story was a tv series THAT SONG WOULD PLAY during that scene, you know? aka please listen to it! for PEAK SCENE EFFECT. I DO NOT ASK FOR MUCH! I'd recommend all of it, but if you don't want to listen to the whole thing, begin at the pre-chorus and go through to the end of the chorus. (here's a direct youtube [link](https://youtu.be/xAQDerBVqWw?t=37). approx timestamps: 0:36 - 1:36). obviously this is not mandatory, though. just very much encouraged. as always, you do you, friends!
> 
> vibe check, if you're curious: I'm going for a sense of goofy teenage innocence mixed with blissful out-of-breath abandon! massive smiles! lovely happiness! 
> 
> thank u 4 your time.

A few days later Kim and Rose are trailing behind the usual Monday morning group of Slytherin fourth-years, all emerging up and out of the main dungeon staircase and into the warmly-lit Entrance Hall. It's fairly bustling, with students making their way to and from class, and Kim takes careful measure not to bump into anyone as they direct their steps to the right and toward the castle front doors.

She's only managed a few strides into the hall before Rose makes a frustrated noise. "Bollocks," she mutters, and Kim looks over to see her stepped off to the side next to a suit of armour, digging through her rucksack and looking annoyed. "Forgot my dragon hide gloves." She makes to turn around and go back down to the common room, but Kim grabs her forearm gently.

"We don't have time," Kim says. Even now, they only have a few minutes to get down to Hagrid's. By the time they go back down to the common room and make it out to class, they'll easily be a half hour late. "We'll just take turns, or you can have mine for the lesson. It's my fault we always go so close to the bell anyway."

Rose scoffs. "If I'm ever desperate to get to class right on time to _handle Blast-Ended Skrewts_ , please assume I'm concussed and take me to Pomfrey," she says drily, snapping her chewing gum. "You know I don't mind, K. How about I take one glove and you take the other?"

"Deal," Kim answers, grinning. Rose walks by her then, leading the way out, and the two of them shuffle towards the towering front doors. They push the one on the right open carefully—Rose with her shoulder and Kim, the taller, with one hand—not wanting to hit the group of Hufflepuffs who are entering the castle from the door next to them.

Rose exits out into the crisp grey morning and Kim makes to follow, only to be slightly hindered by someone trying to weave through her door as a shortcut inside. She sees a flash of a mustard yellow canvas rucksack before there's a familiar face passing by her.

Trini brushes up against Kim as they revolve around one another, each pivoting to allow the other _just_ enough space to get by, and Kim finds herself mirroring Trini unconsciously.

Just like the day they met, really.

"Hey," Trini says, in a voice that's soft and rough at once, amusement in her eyes as she looks up at Kim. There's a soft streak of a shadow on the left side of her jaw—dirt from the greenhouses, no doubt—that manages to come off as endearing, somehow.

All at once, a strange tingling sensation erupts at the base of Kim's neck, like the swipe of a soft brush with just _barely_ enough pressure to register. Everything seems to slow as they hold eye contact, Kim exiting the castle and Trini going in, turning towards each other as they pass.

But space soon starts to slowly expand between them again, time resumes its steady pace, and Trini gives Kim a little upward nod. "Watch where you're going—you'll crash into me one day if you keep doing that, you know," she says, voice chiding but mirth in her eyes, her words a clear callback to their near-collide in the match last spring.

Kim just gives her a disbelieving look and shakes her head, the movement completely unconscious, smiling in a way that feels insistent in how it pulls at her lips, too quick for her to try to tamp it down.

They both start walking backwards in order to keep eye contact, and it's playful, almost.

Moving further into the Entrance Hall, Trini grips at the straps of her rucksack and pushes them outward, as if to shrug. Summer walks behind her, tugging on the handle of her bag and gently towing Trini along with the stream of students moving towards the marble staircase.

The door closes between them and Kim stands there for a moment on the front steps of the castle, staring at the intricately carved, ancient wood. Feeling a tad bit unsteady.

That's until she's gently poked a few times in the back of the head. "Earth to Kim," Rose deadpans. "This is your captain speaking."

Kim whirls around to find Rose standing there looking amused. "Who was that?" she asks cheerfully, grabbing Kim's hand and unceremoniously tugging her forward, speed-walking them in the direction of Hagrid's cabin.

"Er, her name is Trini," Kim mutters, as Rose links their arms in effort to get her to keep pace.

Rose nods. "And? How do you know her?"

Kim blinks, still feeling outside of herself. "She's been there at those pick-up games I told you about. With Jase, you know? Billy knows her from class I think."

Admittedly, she's being _a little_ vague. Kim's very well aware that Trini and Billy have been Potions table-mates since first year, and that they're in the same section of Care of Magical Creatures as well.

And beyond what Billy has shared of his own volition, Kim may have politely grilled him about Trini. Multiple times. In the name of getting to know her better, and whatever.

But she doesn't want to come off as _too_ enthusiastic to Rose or anything.

"Cool, cool," Rose says, humming and looking a bit too knowing for Kim's liking.

The two of them arrive at Hagrid's hut not a minute before the lesson is set to start, and Kim lets out a breath.

.

A few hours later Trini's sat sideways at the very end of the Hufflepuff table, left leg up on the bench and folded as if she was _just_ about to perch cross-legged but thought better of it, leaving her right foot resting on the floor. Gia's up against her back, in the same position but facing the opposite direction, tipping her head backwards onto Trini's shoulder, nearly ear-to-ear, each using the other for support. The gentle ease between them and the rest of their team clustered around feels sleepy; warm, light.

Cedric's thigh is pressed lightly against her knee, him sitting sideways as well and facing her, one leg on either side of the bench, gaze flicking between the rest of their team sitting at the table, to Trini, then back towards the doors out into the Entrance Hall. They have a decent view of the ends of a hearty crowd of people gathered around where they all know the Triwizard Tournament announcement sign to be posted at the foot of the marble staircase.

Trini found him there a few minutes ago on her way to lunch after Transfiguration, before most of the crowd had arrived. At the look on his face—equally determined and apprehensive—she took his elbow gently and steered him here.

Gia offered a few joking comments and he was smiling in no time.

Because sitting like this is easier, watching from here is better, what with the commotion and eager chatter drifting toward them through the doors. It's exciting, and Trini can feel the same buzzing energy coming off Cedric in waves.

And it's not only him who's entering the Tournament, either—a few other upper-years on the Quidditch squad are, too. All talking about it with stars in their eyes, some so bright that it _almost_ distracts enough from the undercurrent of nerves present in their voices.

"Thanks for the rescue," Cedric mutters, now picking at his sandwich. Not really eating any of it.

Trini scoffs. "It was more that you were blocking my path to lunch. Figured I'd just bring you with me if I was coming here anyway."

"Two birds one stone?" Cedric says, smiling. Full well knowing that she went out of her way to pull him along.

"Exactly."

"I'm more of a two birds, one basket person myself," Gia chimes, tipping her head back even further on Trini's shoulder to address the enchanted ceiling; swirling grey clouds with small patches of bright blue streaked throughout. "More humane, friends."

Trini and Cedric smile at each other, and she grabs a chip from her plate to put it carefully into Gia's mouth, maneuvering her arm at an odd, craning angle before succeeding.

Gia hums happily. "Thanks, love."

Cedric tilts his head a little, mirth in his eyes. "Small, you should really eat your own food, you know—"

"I hear a comment about a growth spurt approaching in the distance," Trini deadpans, not looking at him and making a show of giving Gia another chip.

He chuckles. "Just saying."

"Yes, yes, I don't know how I'd survive without you," she says drily, then jerks her head upward in the direction of his untouched food. "How about you practise what you preach there, Captain Handsome."

And he really _should_ , given his face has taken on the same pallor appearance as it does before a big Quidditch match. Trini recognises it well, and knows he tends to forget to eat when he's stressed or worried.

He certainly doesn't need to be mummed, but it's instinct with her at this point, something stemming from the protectiveness she feels over him, her roommates, and the rest of the Quidditch team.

Not best friends, maybe, but people she cares deeply about. People she loves.

Cedric turns to look at his plate and sighs at it, acquiescing. After pouring himself another glass of pumpkin juice, he picks his sandwich up and takes a bite properly. Smiles at her as he chews.

Trini smiles back, easy. He's so much taken her under his wing since her first year on the team that, as far as people at Hogwarts go, she's come to trust his advice and opinions more than anyone else in her life. The least she can do is look out for him a little bit.

He's a good guy, and she adores him, truly.

Trini's about to grab another chip for Gia when a boy in their year, Ernie Macmillan, comes to a stop beside them in the aisle. Trini looks up at him and her face immediately falls into its normal look of indifference.

"Can we help you?" she asks, in a voice not _entirely_ unkind.

He looks back at her and straightens his spine a little. Admittedly, he _is_ standing in front of the entire Hufflepuff Quidditch team, which, in any House carries a certain kind of status that she normally doesn't consider, unless someone's approaching the group of them out of the blue like this.

"I just wanted to—" Ernie starts, then pauses, gaze flitting away from her and to Cedric. "Cedric, did you see that the delegations from Beauxbatons and Durmstrang are arriving at the end of this week?"

Cedric glances pointedly at the still-large crowd of people gathered around the sign at the base of the marble staircase, clearly wondering if it's possible that _anyone_ in the school is not privy to that information at this point, but his voice comes out kind when he replies, "Yeah, I just saw. Are you excited?"

Ernie blinks once, clearly surprised that Cedric asked his thoughts, but recovers quickly, his voice inflating to something closer to his regular pompous tone when he responds, "Oh, yes. As is the entirety of Hufflepuff House, I'm sure—" he chances a glance at Trini, who's watching him with an eyebrow raised, tamping down the urge to roll her eyes; unimpressed with his willingness to speak on behalf of their whole House, "er, given the calibre of the students who are intending to submit their names for the Tournament."

He looks at Cedric again. "I do wish you, and all of you who are entering—" he looks around at the rest of the team, "good luck."

"Thank you," Cedric replies, ever gracious, ever wearing his half Quidditch Captain, half Prefect hat.

Ernie gives a quick nod and departs, walking past them to sit down closer to the middle of the table, well away, where he begins a conversation with another boy in Trini's year, Justin Finch-Fletchley.

Across the table, Cadwallader makes a noise of indifference. "Bloke can talk, can't he?"

Trini smiles, chuckling.

.

In the week leading up to the arrival of the other Triwizard schools the Tournament is all anyone can talk about. Cedric—and the team, when they're with him—is prone to more people approaching him, given that the hot topic of Hogwarts gossip has become just _who_ will submit their names for competition. From what Kim and the boys tell Trini, it's the same in the other Houses, with everyone antsy and excited at the prospect of the Hogwarts Champion being one of theirs.

On Wednesday Trini and Kim leave Ancient Runes to find that the corridor outside their classroom looks much cleaner than it did when the lesson started: suits of armour are gleaming, the floor seems to shine, and even the glass panes covering the lamps are now clear enough for Trini to have to look hard to see if they've been removed entirely.

And they haven't been—they're just spotless, along with everything else in the vicinity.

"Wow," Kim mutters, noticing as well. They pass a suit of armour and her neck has a bit of a spasm, going to glance at it with interest then apparently thinking better of the action.

Trini's about to quip about the possibility of Kim being a vampire, given her apparent aversion to looking at her own (lack of a?) reflection, when _she_ herself looks, eye catching the mirror doubles walking beside the two of them, matching their steps through the corridors—appearing on the clean glass protecting ancient paintings, large and small windows, brass cases containing plaques or department announcements—as they make their way to the Grand Staircase.

As Trini tracks their reflections, a pleasant feeling washes over her. Because something as simple as her and Kim walking through the castle together is becoming familiar, now. Not as unsure.

Though Kim certainly still manages to throw her off-balance at any given moment, of course; that doesn't seem to be changing. But Trini's beginning to suspect that she may not... hate that, actually. With time, it might even be something she could get used to.

The two of them arrive at the Staircase to find more of the same—everything strangely shiny, clear, bright; noticeable despite the castle's usual near-pristine condition. "Gotta hand it to Filch, the pesky git," Trini chimes begrudgingly as they turn off, feet carrying them in the direction of the library.

Kim makes a gentle humming sound in agreement, peering about curiously.

They're nearly at the end of the corridor when a sing-shout erupts from behind them, sounding like the [bugle call](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY58inWev0E) right before someone would yell, 'CHARGE!'—

"DUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUH DAH DA DAH DA DAH DUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUH DAH DA DAH DA DAH DUHHHHHHHH!"

Though the comical shout is almost certainly in jest, Trini whips around as Kim does and draws her wand from within the sleeve of her robes in one fluid motion. Takes a measured, almost casual step to the left in order to be in front of Kim before she recognises the person _barreling_ towards them in a full sprint.

They've never actually met officially, even at her and Jason's birthday breakfast last week, but Trini's certainly heard of Tommy Oliver from the others; seen her from a slight distance.

So she steps back and re-holsters her wand, Kim turning her head and eyeing Trini with an expression she can't place, just as Tommy—tall hair bobbing wildly around her—reaches them and skids to a stop before tackling Kim in a hug.

Gently, though. Even after her frenzied approach.

Kim hugs her back, shorter than Tommy by a few inches; burying her face in her neck in a way that stuns Trini with its intimacy: how she shuts her eyes, gripping at the back of Tommy's robes, arms slid into the small bit of space between where her dark green rucksack meets her back.

And Kim's eyes aren't just closed, but screwed shut—a crease in her brow, like she's trying to remember something; whether recalling the past or etching this present moment into her mind, Trini's not sure.

They break apart and stand in front of each other for a moment before Tommy turns to Trini. Meets her eyes. And a brash kind of confidence radiates from her, though there's a kindness on her face that Trini thinks unwarranted, given they don't know each other.

"You're Trini," Tommy says, voice a similar timbre to Kim's but a couple notes higher. Sticking her hand out to shake.

Trini takes it immediately. "You're Tommy."

They clasp palms then let go—both solid, gripping, but not uncomfortably. Well met.

"Was hoping I might catch the both of you," Tommy says, a bit out of breath as she nods between the two of them. Trini glances over at Kim, who's watching Tommy with a face at ease, now, a kind of unbridled love in her eyes that Trini's only ever seen from her when she's looking at Jason.

It throws Trini a little, given she always figured that Kim was harbouring some kind of romantic feelings for him (despite assurances otherwise). With this though, with how she's _looking_ at Tommy, Trini's hit with the truth of what Kim's been saying this whole time.

And it's not because Tommy's a girl, either. Trini can't put her finger on it—but she's suddenly certain this particular look from Kim isn't romantic. It's unquestionable in this moment, like the second part of a matching set has been revealed, rendering Trini's previous deduction about the nature of it completely incorrect.

"Heard it was you who got the cake for our birthday," Tommy says, meeting Trini's eyes. "Wanted to thank you."

"Used her table, too," Kim adds, a playful kind of helpfulness in her tone, smiling as she watches the two of them interact.

Tommy nods. "That was big. You must be a right important person over in Hufflepuff, eh? I appreciate it, truly."

And Trini finds herself processing her words a bit slower, having to get used to how Tommy speaks. Disjointed—like her brain is flitting between multiple things, thoughts, stimuli, at once.

But she responds in normal time, "Not really. But it was no problem."

Tommy gives her a curt nod, checking her watch with a slight widening of her eyes at what it tells her. "Okay — I have to get to class, but thank you again, Trini."

She looks at Kim and puts a hand on her face in a way that makes Trini feel like she's trespassing on a very private moment. "Love you," she says, then drops her voice down, leaning in close to Kim's face. And Trini isn't sure, but it sounds like she whispers, "Straight on 'til morning, Kimcam."

_Huh._

A Peter Pan reference.

Kim smiles, breathing back a quiet, "Love you," before Tommy nods, gives Trini a little salute, and turns, jogging back the way she came. They watch her go for a few moments, Trini waiting for Kim.

With a different brightness in her eyes, now, Kim turns on her heel and starts to continue back down the corridor, looking lighter than she did a few minutes ago. They walk in silence for a little while, at ease in each other's presence. A slow progression into the beginnings of familiarity. 

"I like her," Trini says, as they cross the wood-paneled library threshold, steps soft on the plush ornate rug that runs the length of it.

Kim smiles. "I'm glad you do," she returns, sincere. "It's kind of hard not to — I learned that a long time ago."

Trini gives her a soft smile back. "It's cool that you all grew up together."

"Yeah. We got everything when we were little—the three musketeers, stooges, amigos..."

The two of them make their way through the library, soon finding the boys at their regular table tucked amongst shelves in one of the smaller reading rooms. Looking at home already as always, given they have another free period when Trini and Kim have Ancient Runes.

"Hi boys," Trini greets, dropping into what has become her regular chair next to Zack.

Kim does the same immediately across from her, pausing for a moment before sighing heavily and starting to take her homework out of her bag. Her Potions book hits the table with a bit of a louder _smack_ than she intended, if the look on her face afterward is anything to go by, and she sends an unimpressed glare at it.

Jason pushes his own Potions book towards Kim, tipping to the left to get closer to her, then hands her a page of parchment with writing all over it. He looks up at Trini. "We've nearly worked it out, I think," he says, furrowing his brow, and Billy and Zack give little affirmative nods.

Trini hums and digs through her bag, bringing her textbook out and the page of parchment she's been using to try and work out the best possible antidote recipe for their Potions assignment.

And they all decided to put their heads together for this one, given that, upon informing them of the assignment last week, Snape _very_ heavily implied that he would be poisoning one of them in class as a sort of pop quiz. Being his usual slimy self, he hadn't specified when—only saying that it would be sometime before winter break.

That left eight or so lessons of uncertainty between them and safety, so they all figured the sooner they had a solid recipe worked out, the better.

Lucky for Kim, Jason, and Zack, a half hour of their Potions lesson is being cut off on Friday evening this week to give everyone time enough to go to their dormitories, drop their books off, and make themselves semi-presentable for the arrival of the Beauxbatons and Durmstrang delegations. But Trini and Billy don't have that luxury, what with their section taking place tomorrow morning.

Still, even if the other three manage to avoid being poisoned this week, there's plenty of time for it to surprise them in the coming two months.

Trini hands her own notes to Zack and props her elbows up on the table, hoisting herself up and laying across it on her stomach to get closer to where Kim and Jason are huddled together on the opposite side, muttering over the parchment.

"Merlin, this reads like a novel," Kim says, somehow sounding both miserable and appreciative. Her eyes fly back and forth over the page, scanning the contents quickly.

Because the assignment is to come up with the best possible antidote to the wide array of poisons they've studied already this term. It meant researching all of the poisons again, reading up on any relevant antidotes to each, and then trying to Frankenstein-stitch together the best catch-all recipe they could.

Given how many of the ingredients could not be combined under any circumstances, or how some, when mixed with certain poisons, made the drinker even _more_ likely to die, it's proving exceedingly difficult. No doubt Snape's intention with setting the assignment.

But Billy is the most naturally adept Potioneer Trini has ever come across, and this is his area of expertise. Jason is up there, his mechanical mind filling the gaps between steps in Billy's methodical process, and with Zack thrown into the mix—his extensive knowledge of plants, magical and non-magical, an invaluable resource—the three of them have stepped up to the task formidably.

Trini and Kim have put in the work, too, giving more time to this assignment than they really can spare. And it's not like Snape's going to let them _die_ if their antidotes don't work, but a trip to the hospital wing (or worse, a zero for such a large chunk of their term grade) is not ideal.

Zack copies Trini by hauling himself onto the table, coming to lay right beside her on his stomach, chin propped up on a hand as he scans her offered notes, brow furrowed and nodding to himself every few seconds. Billy comes around to stand just behind Jason and Kim, and the five of them work on it like that—bickering lowly over ingredients, steps, methods in the brewing process—for almost two hours.

By the time they're all satisfied, a neatly-written finished recipe is inked onto a fresh page of parchment in front of Jason. It sits next to the previous one, a page covered in all of their handwriting: Zack's spiky and erratic with embellishments on certain letters, Billy's regular-cursive hybrid, Jason's blocky and heavy-handed but very legible, Kim's cramped and almost never linked together, and Trini's own, which is something like a speed-cursive, with sweeping strokes and nearly every word consisting of one, unbroken line.

Kim clears the table in front of her and pulls the finished recipe towards herself. Frowns, then places the rough page of notes above it as well.

Nodding once, she draws her wand, takes a deep breath, then twice mutters, " _Geminio_."

Four copies appear in a neat line beside both, and Trini and the boys smile at Kim fondly.

"Here—" she passes them around, "you go."

Jason takes the two originals, placing them into his Potions book carefully. Stares at them for a moment before shutting them into it, finally, with a little sigh.

"Well, I could eat an entire barrel of bezoars," Trini chimes, rubbing at the back of her neck and starting to pack up. As she puts the page of rough notes away she glances at it, at all of their handwriting there together, and the sight of it causes the corner of her mouth to tick up a little.

Across from her Kim chuckles at the comment, shaking her head and packing up with the rest.

"I could eat a barrel of... potatoes. Or apples. Like a normal person," Zack chirps, grinning and elbowing Trini a little as the five of them start to make their way out of the library.

Trini shrugs. "Suit yourself."

"Better be a barrel of _something_ left," Kim mutters, glancing at her wristwatch and unintentionally swerving a little as she does. Ever uncoordinated on her feet despite her prowess when she flies. "We're pushing it."

At that all five of them walk a bit faster, progressively hurrying through the castle at a quicker and quicker pace, taking shortcuts and scurrying along until they eventually devolve into _racing_ each other in the last stretch—full sprints with laughs echoing through quickened breaths off stone walls, punctuated by racing heartbeats.

Kim arrives first, the fastest, tagging the nearest open door of the Great Hall like an idiot with Trini skidding in inches behind. They're followed a few yards back by Zack—who only beat the other two boys because he managed to weave _beautifully_ around a stray gaggle of tiny first-years without stopping. Billy and Jason had lurched to a halt at the obstacle, not as graceful and probably scaring the first-years half to death before apologising and going around them, yelling their frustrations at the other three, carried forward by their laughter.

As Billy and Jason come peeling onto the landing of the marble staircase and start taking the steps three at a time, Zack walks between Kim and Trini and grabs Kim's wrist, hauling it up dramatically like she's a newly-minted Olympic medalist.

And Trini could swear Kim's blushing at the theatrics, her cheeks more red than they were moments ago, as Zack drops her hand gently and moves to Trini to do the same. Trini lets him, rolling her eyes but pleased, and once done he looks between them, head swiveling back and forth before raising both his own fists up into the air.

"BRONZE! SUCK IT, BOYS!" he yells, throwing his head back to the cavernous Entrance Hall ceiling, bending backwards at the waist like a limbo dancer.

His voice seems to balloon in the relative emptiness of the space, given most of the school has already retired to their common rooms for the evening. Trini and Kim share a look that's equal parts apprehensive and goofy, then tip-toe a few paces to pop their heads tentatively through the open doors and into the Great Hall.

Peering about, they find twenty or so students scattered around still. Thankfully, Professor McGonagall—or any of the other teachers who would've _certainly_ given Zack trouble for that outburst—is nowhere in sight.

The only two teachers remaining at the staff table are Professors Sinistra and Sprout, who both look up, eyebrows raised at the noise but unable to see out into the Entrance Hall from their positions.

In tandem Trini and Kim throw themselves back out wildly, not wanting to be seen and get blamed for the disturbance. When their eyes meet they smile wide at each other. Bright, high on adrenaline.

Jason and Billy are huffing and puffing beside them now, both looking winded but in good enough physical shape to not be too fazed by all of the running. With a little bob of his neck, Jason reaches up and adjusts the strap of his new rust-red leather messenger bag—a generous birthday present from Kim—like he's loosening a tie. Zack fidgets with his black rucksack, loosening the straps a bit and perching it on one shoulder casually.

And Kim steps up to Trini then—right into her personal space—to pinch at the front of her robes with careful fingers, straightening them a little from where they'd apparently twisted around—

_What the fuck what the fuck bE COOL GOMEZ._

Trini's unable to prevent her brain from short-circuiting right then and there; as a result she only faintly registers Billy preening in her peripherals, all of them trying to look like responsible, calm members of the student population before they walk in to supper.

There's a beat where Trini blinks up at Kim, unable to find anything out of place to fix on her person in return. Nothing imperfect. So she settles for inclining her head a little.

"Thanks," she breathes.

Kim just smiles in response and sways to sort of lurch to the side, going into a silly step and walking through the open doors of the Great Hall as if she's taking a leisurely stroll through the grounds. They all follow her, holding back laughs and acting nonchalant as they make their way to the Gryffindor table on the far side. It's empty save for a handful of people sitting near the middle, and they plop down onto the first bit of bench they come across.

There's still food around and they all start to eat, not in a rush, given that the house elves tend to wait until everyone has exited before taking everything away. And within reason, of course—Trini's certainly missed supper many times and taken an unplanned trip to the kitchens as a result.

"Good job team," Jason says lowly, tearing into a roll with his teeth in his best goofy dog impression and grabbing a lamb chop from his plate.

.

The next day, Trini and Billy manage to survive their Potions class and walk into the Great Hall together. Her roommates elected to go back to the common room for lunch, so she makes her way with Billy over to the Gryffindor table.

The two of them arrive to find Jason and Zack sitting amongst their regular group of Housemates, chatting lightly about something that happened in their Transfiguration lesson.

"...man, I feel bad for Neville though," Zack's saying, shaking his head. "McG's been on the warpath this week."

"Her and every other staff member in this castle," Trini chimes drily, sitting down opposite him and Jason, back to the doors, with Will giving her a little fist bump in greeting as she does.

Billy nods. "Filch has, certainly: after our Herbology lesson yesterday, Kim and I came in for break with the rest of the class and he was there, yelling about mud on our shoes."

"He _really_ has to find a hobby," comes Kim's voice, and she drops into the space of bench on Trini's right, unwrapping her arms from around her Charms book and stowing it in her rucksack. "Hi," she breathes, tipping into Trini a little.

"Hi," Trini greets back, matching Kim's soft smile.

Jason sighs. "Well, once the other schools get here tomorrow I'm sure they'll calm down a bit."

Everyone seems to agree on this, and they all fall into a jovial kind of chatter for the majority of the lunch hour, complete with an impassioned, season-appropriate debate between Will and Mackenzie in effort to determine the superior autumnal pie between apple and pumpkin. 

Kim chuckles after a bit, mutters, "I reckon 'both' is always a good option," and catches Jason's eye across the table. He seems to find her answer _very_ amusing, smiling to himself as more and more of the kids around them take sides in the Great Pie Debate.

And Trini peers between the two of them, in agreement with Kim but for the life of her unable to understand what's so funny. She eventually decides it's likely an inside joke; part of the nearly-telepathic, known-each-other-since-birth bond that Kim and Jason have going on.

Sometime later the conversation moves to talk of Potions, and Zack jerks his head in Trini's direction. "Glad to see you're both still kicking, though," he says, looking between her and Billy.

"Yeah," Trini returns, sighing and resting her cheek on her hand, unimpressed. "Looks like Snape isn't going to do it this week, but we still have two months to go."

"Joy," Kim deadpans.

Billy checks his dad's silver watch, nodding once to himself, then shifts as if making to stand up. "It's almost that time, everyone," he announces.

There's a brief few moments where some people—Rocky, Jason, Kim, and Zack, particularly—stuff one last bite of food into their mouths with abandon before everyone starts to get up in unison, stretching.

The group of them walk out of the Great Hall a minute later, all going the same way.

And they diverge as they climb up through the castle: Jason, Zack, and the rest of the Gryffindors to Defense Against the Dark Arts, Billy in the direction of a shortcut up to Ravenclaw Tower for his free period, and Kim to Transfiguration. Trini soon spots her roommates on their way to Charms and takes the stairs two at a time to catch up.

"Hey," Chip greets, as the four of them turn off the Grand Staircase with some other Hufflepuff fourth-years.

Trini smiles, bumping her shoulder into Summer's as they walk.

They soon arrive in the classroom, setting up at their regular table by the window, and Gia, Summer, and Chip each take _three_ books out of their bags with effort. All giving a little huff as they do. Their class has started the lecture series leading up to Summoning Charms, with everyone required to read three extra books on the subject before they even start any of the practical work.

But Trini's already done all of that, so she takes her Ancient Runes syllabary out of her bag instead, given she's not due for another extra assignment from Flitwick until next week. With a small sigh, she starts to lay out her translation homework, historically not great at concentrating on non-Charms material during this class, but determined to try.

She tunes out most of Flitwick's lecture and the majority of their lesson passes quickly enough. By the time he's finished and has deemed the remainder of their class time a work period, Trini's managed to complete most of her translation assignment (except for the last two questions, which she's been reading over and over again for the past eight minutes).

Her Housemates are chattering softly throughout the classroom, now at work on the assigned questions, and Summer's voice sounds from beside her. "T, can you explain something to me?" she asks, with the little line present between her eyebrows that indicates frustration with herself.

Trini looks at her fondly, dropping her quill and reaching over to put her thumb there lightly, smoothing it out. "I'll try — what's up?"

Summer nods once, more to herself than anything. And she's not typically one to ask for help from anyone, ever—too proud—so this must be stumping her. "Okay, so Summoning is different than Conjuration, I know that."

"Right."

"But my question is this: could I, in theory, Summon something that was like, down at the Quidditch pitch and have it come to me up here, despite all of the closed doors and shit that are probably between?"

"Yes," Trini responds, tone sure.

Summer frowns. "Okay. But... what would happen? Would the thing I Summoned just pass through any barriers it came across? That's what I don't understand, because it says here that—" she peers down at her book, "when we're talking Summoning versus Conjuration, 'The _distinction_ is between material and immaterial.'"

Trini nods.

"So whatever I Summoned wouldn't be able to disappear—become immaterial—then reappear to reach me, right?" Summer asks, tilting her head. "Because that's _Conjuration_ , which isn't what this is."

Trini hums. "You're right — so no, it wouldn't just pass through barriers like a ghost or something. The charm is like... an invisible magical rope. It has to have a path. So if there were locked doors, as long as they weren't magicked to be un-lockable, it'd probably break through them entirely."

"But," Trini continues, drumming her fingers on the table, "the spell is _really_ efficient. As it has to be. So it'll take the path of least resistance: if you Summoned something from the Quidditch pitch to here, whatever it was would likely just bust through the window—" she gestures to the one beside them, "rather than act like a person would and take the proper path up here."

Summer nods, hums. "Okay. And that's because it's directed by that 'shimmer'—" she pushes her book toward Trini, putting her finger on a passage, "which acts as a target?"

"Yeah. For the longer ones, at least," Trini confirms, then pauses. "You won't see it if you're just Summoning something across the room, though—" she draws her wand out of its holster and mutters, bringing one of Flitwick's blackboard erasers zooming toward them in demonstration, which she catches easily, "but if you did your Quidditch pitch thing, then you very likely would. It surrounds the caster to give the spell something to aim for, given that you have to be concentrating on exactly what you want to Summon and where it is, instead of where you want it to _go_."

"Gotcha," Summer mutters, looking more at ease.

Gia pops her head over, interested. "But that shite would fail if whatever I was trying to Summon was in a magically locked room, aye? Where the walls couldn't be blasted apart either?"

"Yep," Trini answers. "The spell relies entirely on two things: the proficiency of the caster and intent. If you yourself couldn't get whatever it is out of the room by magic, then the charm won't be able to, either."

"So no disappearing then reappearing outside the room, or passing through walls," Summer mutters, making a note on her page of parchment.

"No. But if it was in a box, that was in another box, that was in a _bigger_ box," Trini says, grinning, "all of which you were capable of blasting apart by magic, then the spell would probably make a right great mess in order to get whatever it is you're Summoning to you." She pauses, humming. "So you have to be careful with it, I guess? If you're proficient enough—and provided there's no anti-jinx and it's within the limitations of the spell—then whatever you're calling _will_ come to you."

"Brilliant," Chip murmurs, looking down at her own finished page of questions.

"Thanks, T," Summer says sincerely.

Trini smiles back at her, happy to help. If prompted, she could talk about stuff like this all day long.

Charms finishes quickly after that, and upon dismissal the four of them make their way directly down to the basement, grabbing some supper from the kitchens on the way instead of going to the Great Hall. Trini just takes a tiny chicken pot pie for the moment, given that there's a pick-up game scheduled for six o'clock or so.

They soon arrive in their common room, finding a fire crackling merrily in the hearth, with people lounging around chatting or doing homework amongst the numerous hanging and potted plants scattered about. It's all light woods, vibrant yellows, and lush greens, making the place feel bright and full of life despite being underground.

Trini and Summer let out content little sighs at being home. Trailing Chip and Gia, they make their way to their dorm, dropping their bags and all changing into lounge clothes save for Trini, who pulls on the kit she wears for pick-up matches. Today, that includes a long sleeve t-shirt, joggers, and an insulating, fitted black hoodie.

She retreats into the comfort of the study area below her bed, padding down three little wood stairs into the sunken space and letting out another sigh.

Moseying to her small shelf on the right to peruse her record collection, she flips through the jackets aimlessly before settling on Dire Strait's _[Brothers In Arms](https://open.spotify.com/album/15J400U0rEpgE64UQgtvLs)._ Sets it up, cranking the lever a few times to start it and bringing up the sound-muffling charm that she uses to spare her roommates the noise.

Forgoing her regular attempt at Coolness in the comfort of her own space, she starts to sing along to the first song, ['So Far Away'](https://open.spotify.com/track/3QHThjKGMW7y89xIEvB0J4), letting herself sway a little goofily as she goes to sit at her desk. Plopping into the chair, she fishes through her bag for the folded _Daily Prophet_ that she swiped from the Ravenclaw table this morning.

A few smooth, gurgling _chirps_ reach her ears as Sabre appears, immediately jumping up to sit on her lap. Bops her head into Trini's ribs a couple times before curling up contentedly.

Trini coos down at Sabre and Summons her glasses out from the bottom of her rucksack, making an effort not to move her now-occupied legs around too much. Perching them on her nose, she unfolds the paper and starts to read an article, given she already checked the British and Irish Quidditch League standings on her way out of breakfast—happy to see that her favourite team, the Tutshill Tornados, is doing well.

Homework isn't really an option at the moment, anyway, since she's meant to go down to the pitch shortly. That besides, the arrival of the other two Triwizard schools is scheduled for tomorrow; given the Tournament is all anyone's been able to talk about, it's hard not to feel like her schoolwork can wait until the weekend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'flesh without blood' by grimes. (DID YOU LISTEN TO IT DURING THAT RUNNING THROUGH THE CASTLE SCENE? DID IT CAPTURE THE VIBE OF INNOCENT BLISSFUL WILD YOUTH? I VERY MUCH HOPE SO!)
> 
> if you were wondering about trini's 'barrel of bezoars' comment — a bezoar is a stone taken from the stomach of a goat. snape mentions them in harry's FIRST ever potions lesson as an antidote to most poisons in the HP universe. trini's idea of a little joke, there.  
> \- fun fact #1: this is a case of JKR taking inspiration from Real Life history! bezoars were once thought to be a universal poison antidote, to the point where rich people had them made into jewelry for QUICK ACCESS (legend has it that queen elizabeth I had one in a silver ring, even). and wouldn't you know it, modern day tests have found them to be quite effective against a VERY common poison back in the day: arsenic.  
> \- fun fact #2: a bezoar is what harry used to save ron's life when he was poisoned in book 6!
> 
> \---
> 
> SO! HELLO! bigger chapter this week! she is large! and in charge!
> 
> got a whole bunch of things happening here. we begin with trini and kim having a very Soft Interaction! and Kim feels like she got bonked over the head ever so gently. trini is very much the suave one in that handful of moments, given kim is literally _unable to speak_ as a result of a) unexpected trini interaction b) unexpected trini PROXIMITY (they're SO CLOSE!) c) unexpected trini quips.
> 
> you may be like, 'yo jacinto, but sometimes kim is all smooth with trini and sometimes she is NOT! what is the DEAL?'
> 
> here's the THING: the key with these girls is that they throw each other off-balance. both of them reference this over and over again because they find the feeling SO confusing. now! as individual people they're quite smooth most of the time. but in situations where they arent as familiar, or don't know what to expect, they're _always_ on the balls of their feet, ready to move—their signature plays are surging forward/attacking (kim) and booking it away/defending (trini). which makes instability very much a CONCERN, because their regular responses require balance and control to execute properly. like a chair constantly tipped back on two legs, see? shift the weight a weird way, throw something in the mix that makes it unsteady, and everything goes tits up REAL FAST.
> 
> now, for us, that means these two are going to be ????? very often when interacting with each other. bamboozled frequently. this is their beginning! no person is Super Suave all the time, but it will happen!
> 
> OKAY! next up, cedric's Mentally Preparing to enter the tournament and trini's mumming him a bit. as she does. some interaction with a bit of the team, there. and ernie! who I do not dislike! but like, picture this kid approaching the jock table in a high school cafeteria. likely a hard no from any sensible person. we're lucky cedric is so Nice.
> 
> then TOMMY! running up to kim and trini like a goof! SHOUTING! note she will not always act like this, of course, and you'll see quite the shift in her next chapter for a very good reason. to be discussed in THOSE authors notes. we also have another peter pan reference. that story's significance to kim/jason/tommy will be explained in time.
> 
> we got our first proper TEAMWORK type of thing here between the five OG rangers, with them all figuring out an antidote together! and there is an element of PLAYFULNESS coming into this whole thing now! it has ARRIVED! they're getting comfortable enough to be silly with each other, which is HUGE. very much marks a big milestone aka them really starting to become _friends_.
> 
> aside, hope you're liking the secondary characters. they're all so dumb? you get to meet more as time goes on but I don't want to overwhelm anyone. we'll also learn more about them! hogwarts is a big place full of so many amazing different kids. 
> 
> \---
> 
> I've more to talk about but will attempt to chill, given I'm very aware that these authors notes are becoming less and less coherent. next time you can expect:  
> \- some EXCELLENT roasting of kim from our friendly neighbourhood gay, trini. truly top notch.  
> \- the arrival of the beauxbatons and durmstrang kids, featuring kim and jason being Very Bi on main.  
> \- chapter begins with some Dark background on kim and tommy, which I will likely trigger warning for (descriptions of Heavy Sadness, mainly. and for kim, what it feels like to lose yourself somewhere in the dark.)
> 
> AND!!! look out for the chapter two updates from now (AKA the Halloween Episode). got some fun stuff for you.
> 
> \---
> 
> I say this every update but I can't thank you all enough for reading!! I very much hope you enjoyed the chapter, and please do comment if you have feels! tell me about them! would love to hear. take care of yourselves and have a good week <3


	20. Rearviewmirror

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***NOTE: trigger warning for kim's thoughts on what it's like to walk away from something toxic. it's right at the beginning of this chapter and stays quite abstract—she likens it to a bit of a nightmare fairytale scenario—but if you have any **history with abusive relationships, families, etc.** , it might be triggering because you will very likely find it relatable. there is ALSO a bit of visually descriptive personification stuff that I figure could be considered **body horror** in that same section, so tw for that as well.
> 
> SO! if you'd prefer to skip it you won't miss much at all, promise: ctrl + f = 'taking a deep breath in' and start reading from there! <3
> 
> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/5XtyytAig4m3HkO2XXaL9l). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Kim stifles a yawn behind her hand as she walks into the Great Hall for breakfast Friday morning. Beginning to look past the Slytherin table (out of something like habit, now), she scans the hall for any sign of Billy or Trini, both who she knows to be early risers.

More often than not, though, mornings are the rare times when Kim will sit at her own House table alone. She finds herself missing it, oddly, even after everything that's happened; a kind of longing for something once had, perhaps.

And even though she knows that it was horrible, toxic, dysfunctional—that who she was before is nobody she would ever like to see again, and her old friends are rubbish people—there's a strange nostalgia she gets sometimes for that feeling of familiarity; of belonging to something... respected, even if that respect came from manipulation and stoking fear in others.

Kim has no desire to return to the person she was, so that _reaching_ for her old life surprises her sometimes; disgusts her, really.

But this is a thing brains do, she knows: they fall into habits, grooves, lines, and make a home there, walls and doors and windows growing out of familiarity into something that resembles comfort. And quite importantly, they do this without prejudice.

Because a habit will grow and form into something home-like even if said habit is destructive, won't it? Like a little cottage built in the middle of a cursed forest, maybe. There's a settling in that happens, a move into a place that you may stay in for years and years; memories are made, experiences had, and the longer you spend in that house, the less and less easy it becomes to picture your life before, or to imagine it after.

This can be good—finding things that you love, things to live for, things to give your life meaning. They colour your world, these habits and familiarities. Give you a home.

And Jason had told Kim once, voice gentle, that to break out of something like that is difficult, and even _more_ so if it's toxic. Because it becomes a matter of pathology, then, doesn't it?

Breaking a regular old habit is hard enough, as it is. But the pathological, the toxic ones? Once you move even _slightly_ away from them—as soon as you take _one_ step outside of that little cottage, that home of poisonous familiarity—it's as if a creeping fear infects you, your intentions, your path forward; a distorting, hideous, gasping fright that crescendos from a whisper to a blood-curdling scream with every step you try to take away.

_Will you ever find another home again? Can you start over? How? Where? With what means?_

But you're doing it! You're walking away through the cursed forest, aiming for the sun, trying to get out of the darkness—

And your steps feel sure until you start noticing things; hindrances to your way forward that weren't there before.

Or... _were_ they?

Because surely you would have noticed that your chest cavity is... open? Like a nightmare you think you may have had once but can't seem to recall the details of; exposing a heart beating, frantic and afraid, underneath an engulfment of black mould, a poison that's bloomed in your lungs, spread, spread—

And, god, is _that_ why you can't breathe?

Surely you would have noticed the twisted vines that ensnare your limbs, now, cutting, constricting, meaning to trap you in the threatening dark muck that's bubbling up around your feet? They certainly must have only appeared once you started walking away.

But… no. There are marks underneath those, too, aren't there? Scars, marring your skin. Old ones that you don't recognise.

Surely you would have noticed... right? It would've clicked. Because these things are obvious once you're outside, walking away, all of it exposed in the light of the day streaking through the haunted, gnarled trees.

But habit is dangerous, isn't it? Because it actively tries to keep you in that old home of familiarity, tries to make you stay, to keep _feeding_ it. It grows and grows until it takes up your entire field of vision, until it seems like all there is. And maybe you were just too ingrained in it all to notice before; to notice the fear that covers you now, that's taken up residence inside of you, that infects everything you are.

It, indeed, is a matter of pathology. These toxic familiarities, noxious habits—they're more difficult to break away from because they fight _back_.

And once you manage to get away, stepping out of the dark cursed bog and into the sunlight proper, still walking forwards, crying as you thank your steadfast, still-beating heart over and over for _never_ stopping, never giving up on you, even after you quit listening to its pleads for help, its desperate yells to get out, to leave, to never come back—

Once you apologise to it over and over, ending with a promise that you will work every single day to remove the suffocating mould that has grown around it, even if it takes you the rest of your life—

Even after all of that, even once you've managed to get out, leaving is _still_ a decision that prompts second-guesses and doubt. Often there's a desire to look back at what you've left behind, just once, maybe; to glance in the rearview. A pull to turn around, because that darkness is what you _know_.

Kim sighs. Shakes herself a little.

She is certainly very aware that brains do this. And with Jason and Tommy’s help, she's trying not to knock herself as much for the longing that tugs at her heart sometimes, even now, telling her that she misses that old home of toxic habit because it's where she _belongs_.

So, in effort to both show herself that she's Tough and to pacify her nostalgia, Kim opts for something as simple as spending time alone at her House table in the early hours of the morning. Given how rarely she sits there during regular hours, it's a nice thing to allow herself. A half measure, yes, but one that is a safe compromise. She loves her House, and the negative association with the past is regrettable, but she's dealing with it.

Or, she's trying.

Taking a deep breath in and out again, Kim quickly determines Billy and Trini aren't present in the Great Hall, finding a moment to stretch her neck a little; to anchor herself back on earth, out of the stormclouds of her memory, before she hears her name sound—easily discernible over the hushed early-morning breakfast chatter, most of the school still not arrived yet.

"Kimcam!"

Kim turns her head and notices a few things at once; the first, that decorations have sprung up overnight: each of the four Houses represented with great silk banners hanging from the walls, only dwarfed by the last, hanging behind the staff table at the top of the hall and emblazoned with the Hogwarts crest. Exuding a magnificence that stirs a warm flame of school pride in her chest.

And then there's Tommy, sat near the centre of the Slytherin table and waving at her in a manner completely unnecessary in the relative emptiness of the place.

With a soft smile Kim makes her way over, coming to stand behind her. The group of Slytherin third-years huddled around Tommy offer varying greetings, all genuine but with different levels of enthusiasm on account of the early hour.

"You're up early," Kim says, resting her hands on Tommy's shoulders. Voice lower than usual, given she hasn't spoken to anyone since she woke up.

Tommy turns around on the bench. Smiles as she looks up at her, though it doesn't quite reach her eyes. "Sit with me?"

Kim searches her face, suspecting what lurks there. Agrees easily as a result. On Tommy's right, Mia Watanabe—the younger sister of one of the Slytherin guys in Kim's year, Cameron—slides over, putting both hands on Bridge Carson's bicep and bodily shoving him along the bench to make room.

With a little hum Kim sits in the open space, moving so she's sidled right up against Tommy.

And Tommy drops her head to rest on Kim's shoulder, sighing softly. "Couldn't sleep," is all she says, only loud enough for Kim to hear.

Kim understands at once, given this time of year tends to be rough for the both of them; she herself has trouble sleeping in the days leading up to the 31st October, too.

She used to love Halloween—still does, really—but it's tainted and clouded by the history it holds for the two of them, now: the day their families found out that both Kim's dad and Tommy's mum were Death Eaters. Kim's dad moved out late that night, and Tommy's mum disappeared the following morning.

And even after four years, it's like the memories stir at the back of Kim's mind without her even noticing consciously, only coming to terms with just how much it's bothering her when she suddenly can't sleep, when her anxiety starts going through the roof even _more_ than usual; when her mind is more susceptible to intrusive thoughts and bouts of darkness, when everything reminds her of her dad—a song, a smell, a sight. Unbidden, her mind will stray to him more than is normal, dwelling on all of it.

Kim interlaces her fingers with Tommy's, squeezing once gently. Telling her that she's right here, too.

With her free hand she grabs the coffee pot, pouring herself a cup with a small sigh and bringing it up to her lips. It's warm as it slides down her throat—hot even. It's steadying somehow, having a bit of discomfort somewhere in her body other than her heart.

They sit in relative silence, the low chatter of Tommy's friends lulling them into a comfortable kind of safety as they revel in each other's company—each the only person who _really_ understands the other where this particular subject is concerned.

"How're you doing?" Kim asks quietly, nuzzling her cheek into the top of Tommy's head.

Tommy takes a deep breath in and lets it out in a heavy sigh, undramatic and defeated. "As is typical, I guess."

Kim nods. "The Triwizard stuff might help with diverting our attention."

"Here's to hoping."

And Kim has an idea, then. "Do you... maybe want to hang out tomorrow night?" she tries, voice timid. "I know there's that Halloween party in the common room, and if a Slytherin gets picked for Hogwarts Champion I'm sure it'll be a whole lot more fun, even, but maybe after—"

"K, I haven't been to one of those parties yet," Tommy says, taking her hand. "Never in the mood this time of year."

"Okay."

"That's to say I'd love to hang out," Tommy continues, a sad kind of smile appearing in her voice. "Anything in mind?"

"Not at all," Kim admits, then pauses. "Maybe we can go outside? Or just commandeer a dungeon and camp out?"

"I'd _love_ that," Tommy replies, tone perking up a bit. She tips back up into a regular sitting position and looks at Kim. "Wait, I know you didn't mean 'camp out' literally, but do you wanna do a sleepover? We can ask Peppy too?"

Kim blinks a couple times, then _beams_. "Absolutely."

Tommy nods slowly, considering. "I'll tell you what—you bring the tunes, I'll bring the booze, and we can task our boy with the food."

"A proper get together, then?" Kim quips, chuckling. "Deal."

.

Later that night every Hogwarts student is out front of the castle in full uniform, arranged in lines by House and year. It's a chilly evening, just before six o'clock with not a cloud in the dark sky, and Kim finds herself relatively at ease as they all wait for the Durmstrang and Beauxbatons delegations to arrive.

In the anticipation of not knowing how they're arriving or where they're coming from, there are hushed, excited whispers around her, everyone chatting away in anticipation.

That's until Dumbledore's voice sounds from the back of the group, where he's stood with all the other teachers, "Aha! Unless I am very much mistaken, the delegation from Beauxbatons approaches!"

Kim feels Tommy grip her shoulder excitedly from the line behind, and there's a few moments of confusion before someone shouts, "There!"

She squints, soon spotting it: over the treeline of the Forbidden Forest in the distance sails a carriage the size of a house, powder-blue in colour and pulled by _massive_ flying horses.

It lands in the grass in front of them all, and there's only a few seconds of pause before a towering woman—who Kim can only deem 'Hagrid-sized' in effort of being polite—emerges, followed by a dozen boys and girls in thin blue robes.

She speaks with Dumbledore for a moment before they make to go inside the castle, and the Hogwarts crowd parts to let them through. Kim's watching them go by curiously when she spots a girl: long, silky silver-blonde hair flowing behind her as she walks, face arranged in a look of distinction, the bluest eyes she's ever seen...

All at once punch-drunk and dazed, Kim doesn't realise her jaw is hanging open until a sharp pain erupts in the top of her foot, bringing her crashing back to earth. "OW!" she hisses, wheeling around to see Tommy looking at her with an unimpressed eyebrow raised. "What was that for?!"

Tommy scoffs. "I've been _talking_ to you, space cadet."

Kim puts a bit of weight on her foot and winces. "But stamping on my foot?" she whines, pouting. "Why don't you _love_ me?"

Tommy rolls her eyes and puts Kim into a light headlock, causing her hat to fall off with the flurried movement. "She's beautiful, I'll give you that," she whispers into her hair. "You are but a simple Bi, after all."

"Ugh," Kim groans, elbowing Tommy in the ribs to get her to relinquish the hold.

.

Once the welcoming feast is over, Kim can be found sitting together with Jason, Billy, Zack, and Trini, all just moved from their respective House tables to sit at Ravenclaw, strategically, to be closer to one very specific person. And Kim has moved _away_ , to be sure, but having people to freak out with about Viktor Krum's presence in the castle outweighs being a bit further from the Slytherin table.

Jason still hasn't said anything, seemingly too shocked to speak. Truly, he looks like he's just been hit over the head.

"You three are acting quite strange," Billy says, looking between Jason, Kim, and Trini pointedly.

Trini bobs her head a little to acknowledge him but doesn't take her eyes off Krum. "The best Seeker in the entire world is _right_ there. In our school. Breathing our air."

"This is a big deal," Kim mutters, very much in agreement, mimicking Trini by gazing wistfully in Krum's direction with her head resting heavily on one hand, elbow propped up on the table.

Zack twists around to glance at Krum then turns back to them, looking at Trini curiously. "Wouldn't have figured you for a fangirl," he says, not unkindly. More interested.

Trini shrugs, eyes still locked on the Slytherin table. "I'm full of surprises," she murmurs, then pauses for a beat. "Wouldn't be a bother to him or anything, though. Not my style. It's just mental that he's here."

Jason nods. "He's actually not half-bad looking up close, eh?" he muses, finally finding his words. Contributing excellently to the conversation.

"Solid five Snitches out of ten," Zack says, turning around to sit with his body facing the top of the hall in order to look between both parties easier, tilting his head a little.

Jason makes a disagreeing noise. "Nah mate, more like an eight."

"Eight my arse," Trini chirps. "I'd go with five, plus three for the star Quidditch player bit. But not eight on his own."

"I might say nine," Kim chimes, and all four of them whip their heads around to look at her. "What?" she asks, shrugging.

Jason looks back at Krum and squints, like he's trying to determine something now. After a few moments, he hums. "Ah, I see," he says sagely.

"See what?" Zack asks, looking over too, as if expecting something to reveal itself in a puff of colourful smoke.

Jason lets out an elaborate sigh. "K here only said nine because he's _broody_."

Kim scoffs. "Like _you're_ any different. We have the same type."

In her peripherals, Kim sees Trini look at her curiously. "Broody is your type? Really?" she asks, voice absent the usual deadpan. And Kim turns to face Trini then—when their eyes meet proper, her stomach does a neat somersault, then another, then another.

_Fuck, again with this shit?_

"Maybe I'm full of surprises too, Trin," Kim answers lowly, echoing Trini's words from earlier and tipping her head to the side a little. And it already comes out about _ten_ times more flirty than she intended just based on the tone of her voice, but with it being the first time she's tried a nickname for Trini, it's off the charts.

_Oh no, oh no._

She overshot it big time. Air sirens begin sounding in her head, Jason meets her eyes and raises his eyebrows once, and Kim resists the urge to cover her face with her hands.

_Mayday, mayday, brace for impact — catastrophic levels of embarrassment coming in fast._

Trini just looks back at her though, something unknown flickering in her eyes before she shrugs. "Isn't broodiness just a whole mess of angst wearing a pout?" she says, full deadpan restored. "So doesn't that mean you'd be dating yourself, then?"

At this, Zack immediately starts _cackling_ , and Kim's jaw full-stop drops open, flabbergasted and still not at all completely recovered from her own (mostly) accidental flirty remark.

But Trini is teasing her, and properly!

This, of course, is nothing new. And Kim has no idea why her heart's just done a hop, skip, and a jump; perhaps because romantic interests is a topic they haven't discussed at length, yet.

She feels equally delighted by this development and pleasantly smacked in the face by the jab, and she's frozen, jaw still somewhere on the floor, blinking rapidly but not breaking eye contact with Trini, who makes an admirable effort at keeping a straight face before a smirk pulls, pulls, pulls at her mouth. It spreads, grows, until she's wearing the most _smug_ smile that Kim's ever seen on her.

It is _certainly_ a new look, and Kim finds herself with the sudden feeling that she is in very big trouble with this girl, a message that sounds loud and clear over the still-shrieking air sirens in her brain, over the beating drum of her heart.

And Durmstrang's Headmaster Karkaroff provides a brief distraction—a respite in which to compose herself and locate her jaw—when he strides up to the Slytherin table and looks down at Krum with concern. It's hard to make all of his words out, but he definitely says something about going back to the ship.

The rest of the Durmstrang students get up, pulling their large furs on to protect against the chilly October night and beginning to make their way to the doors. Kim notes the rest of the Great Hall is emptying around them, and they all take it as their cue to get going.

Trini gets to her feet, continuing to hold Kim's gaze for a few more moments before shrugging again, still smiling like an _idiot_ at the bewildered look that seems to have permanently fixed itself to Kim's face. "Listen, I'm just trying to do a public service. You dating someone like him'd cause the world to implode in on itself—time as we know it would cease to exist, and reality would become one really long Smiths song, repeating over on loop."

Kim groans and starts to laugh despite herself, shaking her head in disbelief as they all begin to walk towards the doors. "You're such a nerd!" she exclaims, aghast and really laughing now, feeling it lighting up her eyes. "Merlin, I'm getting the mickey taken out of me by a bona fide nerd!"

Trini pulls a face. "Birds of a feather," she mutters, with that same charming, cocky deadpan that works for her somehow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'rearviewmirror' by pearl jam. incidentally, one of kim's favourite bands! you'll see more about this later.
> 
> dumbledores line when beauxbatons is arriving is directly from my copy of GoF!
> 
> \---
> 
> hello! welcome back! 
> 
> jumping right in with kim doing some introspective stuff in the first bit there. and you'll notice we dip into 2nd person for that little section, yes? kim's done this before—specifically when she was having a Think in chapter 13 about the Amanda Situation post the confrontation that trini witnessed. lens gets a bit closer so you can _feel_ it all a bit more, but I don't do that often. interestingly, from a POV perspective, each of our girls thinking about their feelings in a more abstract, 2nd person, 'you' type of way is a SEPARATION tactic! ie. holding a feeling at arms length and trying to figure it out! they push the feels away from themselves and closer for you to see! it's bonkers! if it feels a bit jumbled, that's cause it IS!
> 
> so kim has a tendency to do it when she's describing her Dark Feels, and trini will do it very rarely, but almost always when she's thinking about herself in relation to the people around her. that's to say that these two will go into 2nd RARELY, but when they do, it'll likely be when they're thinking about what freaks them out the most. for kim, it's herself and all the crappy stuff she has done/is capable of doing. for trini, it's other people and the idea of being vulnerable. all of that will be expanded on in time.
> 
> also! I wanted to note! with the bit at the beginning about the heart and the chest and the mould RE kim — it's supposed to... feel more organic and alive than scary. I wasn't trying to gross you out and this aint a gory/graphic fic u kno? like, I warned for body horror just to be safe! but my intention was to put a visual to a feeling, as is often the case. wanted to drive home that upside-down fairytale sense. unease and worry type of vibe. like a bad dream.
> 
> but yes. otherwise, we have a bit about kim and tommy RE their parents, which will be explained more next chapter, I believe, then further via a kim flashback in late second semester of fourth year. and kim going into the Dark Sad Zone real quick at the beginning of this chapter very much has to do with this being a crappy time of year for her.
> 
> (I KNOW CAM AND MIA ARENT SIBLINGS IN PR BUT SUE ME DUDES! like! come on now! they're in PRNS and PRS? right beside each other? this is how it should have been and I am allowed to SAY IT, thank YOU!)
> 
> as for fleur, I mean, it would be such a wasted opportunity for kim not to swoon. kim's Very Bi! like, a girl who's part _veela?_ give me a BREAAAAAK. and krum is krum. yo, if you've only seen the movies like... he isn't stupid! he's a cool dude! Very Good at quidditch! I love him!
> 
> aaaand RE trini saying reality would fold in on itself and become 'a smiths song playing over and over on loop' or whatever — explanation is that The Smiths are the most broody, melodramatic, depressing fucking band to ever exist. incidentally, trini thinks they're _massively_ overrated. (AND DONT COME FOR ME IF YOU LIKE THE SMITHS, OKAY? I THINK THEY'RE COOL AND SHIT LIKE, IN TERMS OF HISTORICAL SIGNIFICANCE! TRINI DOES TOO, TBH. SHE JUST FIGURES PEOPLE NEED TO CALM TF DOWN!)
> 
> but yes. that was a very time-appropriate joke for kids growing up in the late 80s/early 90s, okay. like... pls understand. trini is HILARIOUS and I love her. (and so does kim)
> 
> halloween episode next, friends. update will be sooner than the usual (aka sometime in the next few days) in effort to keep it within the SEASON! look OUT!
> 
> \---
> 
> (if this A/N seems more ??????????? than normal, that's because it is. hope you can follow along.)
> 
> I love each and every one of you very much for continuing to appear!!! your readership & wonderful comments fuel me and replenish my mana. thank you for coming along on this train with me, and take care of yourselves!


	21. By Your Side

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/6aXGgKVRGXlMqQYCIQqo4s). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Stop moving, damn it," Trini mutters, frowning.

"It _tickles_ , you bitch—"

"S, be nice," Gia says, sighing loudly.

"I am! Can't blame me for twitching—"

A shrill whistle sounds from the door of their dormitory. Chip stands there, kicking off her slippers with a brown cardboard pizza box in hand as she says, "Every year, without fail, you two start with this shit then end up practically making out by the end of the night. Can it."

Trini and Summer look up at her with pleasantly stunned expressions, Trini pausing in her application of costume makeup with a steady hand frozen a few inches from Summer's face.

Chip gives the two of them a deadpan stare. "What?"

"Maybe we should re-evaluate our character roles?" Trini chimes, sharing a grin with Summer before she resumes drawing.

Mindful of keeping still, Summer quirks an eyebrow. "Yeah, Trini's supposed to be the hard-arse, not you—"

Trini growls, interjects, "I've a newly-sharpened eyebrow pencil and I will not hesitate to shank you with it."

"Yeah, yeah."

Chip rolls her eyes and walks over to where the three of them are sat in the middle of the room, depositing the pizza box on the floor and flipping it open to much fanfare. Steam rises from it in delicious swirls as Gia pops the caps off a few butterbeers and hands them out, prompting happy murmurs of thanks from all sides.

"You lot can duel me for Mikey," Chip says over her shoulder, walking up the stairs to her loft bed and grabbing her _Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles_ costume from a coat hook on the landing next to it.

(One of Chip's more brilliant ideas, they've been doing a group costume for the House Halloween party since second year. As fate would have it, the four of them are _also_ the reigning beer pong champion team two years in a row, so there's an element of superstition involved—they're all convinced the group costume is lucky.)

"I'd never dream of it," Trini drawls, patting the little pot of blue face paint next to her fondly, which she uses to create her own character mask for Leonardo. She swaps out her eyebrow pencil for a brush dipped in white paint and starts filling in the space outlined to the sides and above Summer's eyes, avoiding the red mask she's already painted on.

Gia waves her wand and brings Trini's gramophone floating over, placing it on the floor across the room and beginning to sift through the built-in sleeve for records, trying to pick something to play.

Summer carefully pushes a slice of pizza at Trini's mouth, who chomps down on it as she works, and Chip comes back into her line of sight hopping on one foot, mumbling a string of curse words and struggling to get her green spandex shorts on.

A minute later she's donned her Michelangelo costume full stop, her skin now entirely green thanks to a clever illusion charm from Gia. Trini and Summer smile at her, themselves already in their costumes and green-ified, now only left to apply their makeup, eat, and drink a little bit in preparation.

Michael Jackson's ['Thriller'](https://open.spotify.com/track/2LlQb7Uoj1kKyGhlkBf9aC) starts to play from the gramophone and Trini hums along as she finishes up on Summer. Once she's done, Summer pecks her on the cheek and gets up, knees cracking from sitting still. Stretching lavishly, she walks over to the full-length mirror beside her wardrobe and whistles appreciatively at what she sees, running her fingers through her long dirty blonde hair to get it to fall the way she wants. "You always manage to keep me lookin' hot."

Trini smiles and takes a long pull of her beer. "You're welcome."

Chip waves her wand to bring strips of bright orange cloth to wrap around her wrists, elbows, and knees, tying them carefully by magic and humming happily. Comes over to sit in front of Trini with an easy smile on her face, draining the final gulp of her first butterbeer.

Trini brings another two bottles floating over and cracks them, meeting Chip for a cheers then starting on her face makeup. Gia plops down beside them with her prop _b_ _ō_ staff in hand and screws the top off to reveal a hidden hollow centre, becoming intently focused on filling it to the brim with the bottle of firewhisky that seems to have materialised at her side.

They're ready to go proper within another half hour, pleasantly buzzed and happily full of pizza. The party has already started out in the common room but they're expected to make a fashionably late entrance as one of the Four Feat reigning champion teams: one each for beer pong, flip cup, obstacle course, and interpretive dance.

Hufflepuff House is fond of theatrical shenanigans, after all.

Their cue comes in the form of one of the girls in their year, Megan Jones, knocking on their dorm room door and popping her head inside. She flashes them all a big smile, herself dressed as Storm from the _X-Men_ cartoon, part of another group costume. "Ready, you lot?"

Trini smiles and gets to her feet, adjusting her twin swords in the scabbards on her back. The other three get up and do the same with their gear: Gia waving her wand to fix her _b_ _ō_ staff to its sling, Summer fastening her pair of _sai_ to her belt, and Chip suiting up by both securing her _nunchaku_ to her thigh holster and hanging a pair of fluffy orange handcuffs from a loop in her belt.

With each of their huge, reflective gold champion belts slung across their bodies like sashes, the four of them file out into the girls dormitory hallway behind Megan, with Summer and Trini elbowing each other jovially on their way like they're about to run out of the tunnel at a football match.

They find Susan Bones dressed as Wolverine leaning up against the door that leads out into the common room, and as they approach, she greets them all with a big smile then turns around to scribble on a piece of enchanted parchment. Megan does the same on another, and both of them look at their wristwatches.

Two separate messages appear on the bits of parchment after a couple moments, then switch in unison to a little number counting down:

_10, 9, 8…_

"Brilliant," Susan mutters, putting her hand on the door handle and opening it up just a fraction. She peeks through and Trini sees the bustle and chaos of the party in the common room, though completely silent from this side of the door due to the enchantments put up by the Prefects for every big bash (out of respect for the kids who are studying, sleeping, or simply don't feel like attending).

Another message appears on both Megan and Susan's squares of spelled parchment: _Song started. 30 seconds to entrance._ The '30' begins counting down on both, and Gia grabs Chip's shoulders from behind and shakes her gleefully.

"Say your prayers, ladies," Megan chimes, beaming. She grips Trini's forearm kindly and steps out of the way, preparing to open the door for them. "Okay, you're go in five, four, three, two, ONE!"

They cross the threshold into the circular common room and are buffeted by an explosion of noise that causes Trini's breath to hitch in awe. It's timed perfectly to coincide with the start of the first verse of ['Holding Out For A Hero'](https://open.spotify.com/track/6Vn7FfpFRMGEpNjbrPTCXV) by Bonnie Tyler, thirty seconds in, right on cue.

And Trini lets out a little laugh in disbelief as she tries to take everything in, her senses overwhelmed but buzzing with joy, hearing a similar sound of amazement from Chip behind her as they file out into the packed common room full of their raucously cheering Housemates.

The whole place is decked out: cobwebs illuminated with spooky white light criss-cross the ceiling, enchanted fog covers the floor up to their ankles, glitter is magically floating through the air, and carved pumpkin jack-o'-lanterns are perched happily on nearly every table surface. In honour of Cedric being chosen as one of the Hogwarts Champions earlier this evening, haphazard congratulatory banners have been put up everywhere, and the party atmosphere (though usually especially rowdy on Halloween) is even more celebratory.

Their entrance song is _blasting_ from the amplified gramophone setup, and as they make their way through the costumed crowd they're patted on the shoulders, high-fived, and fist-bumped by what seems like every person in the vicinity. The four of them are aiming towards the _Reading Room_ stage, temporarily set up for this specific purpose, where Cedric—wearing a crown complete with lights that flash like a traffic signal—and a handful of other upper-year Readers are standing, flanked by a line of enchanted skeletons dancing the can-can.

Once Trini and her roommates step up onto the stage the music lowers in volume a bit. Cedric puts his wand to his throat, voice carrying out easily over the whole room as he announces, "And our final and most esteemed group of the evening: not one, but _two_ -time reigning pong champions, The Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles!"

The room whoops and cheers but Trini holds her hand up, drawing her wand from her forearm holster and pointing it at her own throat. " _Sonorus_ ," she mutters, and her voice magically magnifies for her next words, "I think we can share the Most Esteemed title, no? Who thinks mister Champion should do the Chug with us?"

She manages to keep her voice steady, and in answer the cheering swells to a roar. Cedric, bless his heart, blushes a little.

Trini lowers her wand and holsters it, smiling as she, Chip, Gia, and Summer are all handed half-pints of butterbeer for the traditional Chug that kicks off the Halloween festivities officially—one of Hufflepuff's highest honours. An additional half-pint is quickly floated over, courtesy of a beaming Cadwallader in the back, who gives Trini a little salute with his bottle of water.

She plucks the new one out of the air and hands it to Cedric with a big grin, then steps back into her roommates, leaving a few feet of stage between them and him. And in the midst of the yells, whistles, and continued cheers of their Housemates, the four of them hold their cups up towards him expectantly in a gesture of good faith. Offering to share the honour of kicking off the biggest party of the year with him.

The rest of the House follows, and after a brief moment of hesitation (and now blushing profusely) Cedric holds his up to join theirs in the air, accepting.

Seeing this, the room _loses_ it. Cedric shakes his head, wearing a huge smile, and the five of them knock their drinks back in unison, followed by the rest of their Housemates.

Wiping at his mouth with the back of a hand, Cedric holds his wand up to his throat and speaks again, "With that, the celebrations have officially begun! Let’s have fun tonight, Hufflepuff!"

As their Housemates divert their attention from the stage, Cedric claps Trini on the shoulder and smiles. "Small, you're _trouble,_ " he says, voice returned to its normal volume.

"You love me. And we discussed this beforehand," Trini chimes, gesturing to her roommates, who are all beaming at Cedric. "Knew you wouldn't make a big deal out of the champ stuff, so we did it for you. Not that you're going to need it, mind."

And Cedric, though clearly trying to look unamused, can't keep his smile at bay. After a moment he lets it go, and it lights up his whole face proper. "I do love you, and I appreciate the gesture. That was brilliant."

"I know right?" Gia says, squeezing his forearm and beginning to shepherd them all off the stage. "Let's get us some snacks, aye? All this fanfare's made me peckish again."

Chip hums happily in agreement, hopping up onto Cedric's back to get a better lay of the land, given she's five feet flat—an inch shorter than Trini—and can't see shit through all of the people. She clambers up and, after a few moments of squinting about, points wildly towards the back of the room with a victorious look on her face.

Wasting no time, Summer unclasps one of her _sai_ and takes a hearty bite out of the blade, which is made of hard candy specially for this occasion. She crunches on it contentedly, mutters, "Nice."

.

An hour later finds Jason, Kim, and Tommy situated in a mess of blankets on the floor of a long-unused dungeon classroom, their three sleeping bags arranged in a loose triangle with Kim's old gas lamp flickering happily between them. 

Jason came through with the food: there's a pile of chocolate frogs, custard tarts, popcorn, and a whole array of other snacks, along with a bottle of ginger ale that sits half-finished in favour of switching to the butterbeer Tommy brought. To the girls' delight, he also managed to pilfer two jack o' lanterns from the Great Hall sometime during the day—neither of them had any idea until he arrived earlier _beaming_ (if a bit tired from hauling them down so many flights of stairs), with one in each arm and clearly very proud of himself.

Those two carved pumpkins flank them now, candles lit and joining Kim's gas lamp to be the only sources of light in the otherwise complete darkness. It's just enough to keep the Halloween spirit going, absent the parties and the costumes and other decorations, and in the soft warm light they can see each other perfectly, which is all the three of them really need.

Kim tips back into their little triangle, having lurched away for a moment—still cocooned in her sleeping bag from the waist down—to reach her gramophone and switch out the album they just finished: [_Dookie_](https://open.spotify.com/album/4uG8q3GPuWHQlRbswMIRS6) by Green Day.

And she's just dropped the needle on Sonic Youth's _Daydream Nation_ , with the first song, ['Teen Age Riot'](https://open.spotify.com/track/7uilSLwD6eizA1Hp9SLRgO) now playing at a comfortable volume.

She smiles, feeling content at the freedom of listening to music _inside_ the castle (which is not something she does often, to be sure) with her two best friends. They'd managed a decent sound-muffling charm on the dungeon door between the three of them, so they aren't anticipating that it'll be heard by any chance passersby.

To be safe, though, Jason's borrowed Zack's old pocket Sneakoscope for the occasion, which is placed next to Kim's lamp on the floor. The chances of being caught down here are slim, but it's nice having the peace of mind; if any trouble from Filch happens to be coming their way, they'll have a bit of warning, at least. And with the way the three of them are quickly working their way through the case of butterbeer, their wits likely won't stay sharp for long. Any extra help is welcome.

Tommy tears open a chocolate frog package with her teeth, swiping her hand through the air to dexterously catch it in its escape attempt before cramming it into her mouth all at once. Kim and Jason watch her fondly, sipping their butterbeers and chatting lightly about nothing and everything.

Because the three of them haven't had a sleepover like this since before everything with their parents went down on this night, four years ago. And sure, the beverages are now alcoholic, they're in a dungeon instead of one of their parents' basements, and they've all grown quite a bit taller; but it still rings the same for the most part.

Tommy feels further than she used to, of course, but Kim figures that's because their prior normal was seeing each other _all_ of the time. With her being a different year, now, and not sharing any classes with Kim or Jason, it's different. She's made other friends and it isn't the three of them versus everyone anymore.

But Kim can't blame the rest of the world for finding Tommy as easy to love as her and Jason have always known her to be. And presently, it feels like the three of them might not have to be around each other 24/7 for this to work, anyway; there's a lot to repair and rebuild, but a new type of normal isn't a bad thing.

For the moment they're here in each other's company, which is more than Kim would've even thought _possible_ a year ago.

"Oh, hey," Jason mutters, scooting a few feet over in his sleeping bag like an inchworm to his fancy new messenger bag and starting to rifle through it. "I meant to... I've something for the both of you."

Kim frowns as her and Tommy look at each other for a moment. They both shrug then continue to watch him, amused at how he's clearly struggling.

"And that something is...?" Tommy asks, voice slurring _just_ slightly. Quirking a playful eyebrow.

"Diamonds?" Kim tries, when he doesn't respond after a few seconds.

Tommy bats her eyelashes. "Money?"

Jason mutters a tiny "Ow" and withdraws his hand from his bag quickly, likely having stabbed himself with a quill or something.

Kim takes the opportunity and chimes, "A rare and exquisite type of man-eating flower?"

After a few more moments of Jason's searching, now taking the entire contents of his bag out and piling it all on the dungeon floor, Tommy goes at him again, smirking. "Tickets to Peppy Is Unorganised, the Musical?"

Kim hums, gazing at him sweetly. "Or, alternatively, tickets to the sequel: I Love You Jase But Please Just Tell Us What It Is?"

Jason scoffs. "Will you lot shut _up_ , you impatient—" he finally pulls a parcel out with a flourish, "idiots. The suspense makes it more interesting, no?"

"No," Kim and Tommy say at the same time, then throw grins at each other.

Tommy turns back to look at Jason, shaking her head at him seriously. "It most definitely does not."

"Okay, okay," he mutters, waving his hand and inching to sit directly between them, parcel in hand. His face kind of softens, causing both Kim and Tommy to drop their bantering and peer at him curiously. "My dad showed me some old photos over the summer holiday and I had three copies made of two in particular. I was going to wait until Christmas to give you both yours, but... I don't know."

He pauses, the tipsy haze in his eyes giving way to something clearer. "With this being the first anniversary of... everything that we're together for, I wanted to give you both something to brighten stuff a little, I guess. I don't know what else I can do for you except continue to say that I'm here and I love you, and I hope that these help remind you of that whenever you look at them."

Jason reaches into the parcel and brings out two smaller ones, each wrapped in brown paper with a length of twine keeping it snug, coming together from all four sides into a little tied bow in the centre.

Without thinking about it, Kim waves her hand at her gramophone to bring the volume down to something of a comforting hum. Her and Tommy take their respective parcels, each with their name written on the top in Jason's neat, blocky handwriting, and begin to open them wordlessly. Gently, like whatever they'll find underneath might shatter at any moment.

Tommy gets hers unwrapped faster but waits until Kim catches up, and they reveal them together.

Kim stares down at hers, completely at a loss for what to say. In her hand is a set of two identical handsome frames stacked atop each other, each about the size of a sheet of loose-leaf paper she would use at home. Both with a beautiful wizarding photo inside, the first in black and white and the second in colour.

She focuses on the top one first, trying to take it all in. It's Kim's mum, Tommy's dad, and Jason's parents, all sat shoulder-to-shoulder in lush grass on a sunny summer day and facing the camera. Kim, Tommy, and Jason are in their laps respectively, and what amounts to three mini-scenes are happening simultaneously:

On the left of it is her mum, laughing, younger and sitting cross-legged, facing the camera at a bit of an angle with a tiny Kim—who can't be older than four or five—pulled into her lap, perched on her thigh. And Kim's laughing boisterously facing the camera as well, squirming around as her mum peppers her head and the sides of her face with kisses. Kim leans away from her a little in effort to escape, back brushing up against Tommy's dad Elijah beside them, and brings her little hands up to press her palms flat on her mum's cheeks. Her mum laughs harder, the sides of her eyes crinkling, and rubs their noses together. Both wearing mouth-open smiles and pictured in a side profile now, Kim splays her fingers out on her mum's face and kind of drums them there, bobbing her head side-to-side in a silly movement before Tommy's roaring laughter causes her to turn around and try to reach for her;

Tommy's dad Elijah is sat shoulder-to-shoulder with Kim's mum, him positioned in the centre of the photo, legs splayed out toward the camera with Tommy in his lap, clearly mid-tickle with her because they're both _cackling_. After a moment she climbs up his front to deftly loop around onto his back like a little monkey, wrapping her arms around his neck before she pulls herself up and starts blowing raspberries on the side of his face. He laughs, eyes scrunched almost closed behind his glasses, and reaches two muscled arms back to grab her around the ribs and haul her forward, over his head and back out in front of him. He spins her to face the camera and holds her there upside down for a moment, laughing as she tries and fails to swipe backwards at his face. And Tommy's smiling wide, laughing madly just like him (and clearly having a lovely time experiencing a world flipped on its head) when Kim reaches for her, little arms not long enough to quite make it in her effort to rescue, before her mum pulls her back into her lap and starts tickling her mercilessly. Elijah brings Tommy right side up and back into his lap too, where, still laughing, she attempts to escape to Jason beside her, to little avail;

On the right of the photo are Jason's mum Beverly and his dad Sam, with Beverly cross-legged and Sam half so—right leg stretched straight out and his left propped up, foot flat on the grass underneath them—resting his extended left arm on his knee lazily in a manner that Kim associates so much with Jason. His right arm is draped around his wife's shoulders, in excellent position to playfully ruffle Jason's ever-floppy hair where he sits in her lap, head tipped back to peer at his mum as she looks down on him from slightly above, the two of them clearly having some kind of silly face-making competition. After a moment Sam gets into it, leaning into Beverly to put his face next to hers, and Jason reaches up and grabs his nose. Sam to puff his cheeks out and makes a noise that sends Jason into a fit of giggles that has him occupied for a solid few more seconds, before he tries to pull Tommy to safety and into Beverly's lap with him.

The scene repeats again and Kim finds herself smiling, though her chuckle catches a bit as it leaves her chest, the picture blurs a little periodically, going in and out of focus.

She wipes at her eyes with the back of her hand.

Photo number two is just the three of them, a couple years older than the previous, standing in Jason's large back garden underneath trees whose leaves are ablaze with autumnal oranges, yellows, and reds. There's a massive heap of leaves at their feet, and each of them is wearing a matching mischievous grin.

They all pick up giant armfuls and toss them in the air at once, where they're whipped up in a light fall wind. With Kim and Jason distracted, Tommy takes two handfuls of leaves and grabs at the necks of their wool jumpers, cramming them down their backs. And it's pandemonium then, the two of them chasing her around, laughing, before Tommy drops into the pile of leaves on her knees in surrender and Jason and Kim both hop in as well, falling over each other like wrestling lion cubs and pelting her with great handfuls. And certainly, after a few moments, devolving into doing the same to each other.

The person operating the camera zooms in on them when they all stop, cheeks flushed and panting, sporting manic, elated smiles as they look from each other then back to the camera with bright eyes.

Kim blinks a few times and looks up from the photos, meeting Jason's eyes. "Thank you," she breathes, unable to put how she's feeling into any other kind of coherent statement.

Tommy is more of the same, simply putting her hand on Jason's cheek gently in thanks before wiping at her own teary eyes. "Jase, these're lovely," she mutters, voice sincere.

Jason takes both of their hands and kisses them. Tommy takes Kim's, and the three of them just sit there, watching the photos move in silence for a little while.

And they're both from before everything happened with Kim's dad and Tommy's mum—the first taken on a day when Kim's dad was likely away on a job with Gringotts and Tommy's mum was on shift at St. Mungo's. There are _so_ many photos of the three of them, of their families; all in mismatched assortments with Kim's dad and Tommy's mum appearing in the vast majority. But Kim hasn't looked at any of their photo albums since her parents split up, and given Tommy's reaction now, it's likely that she hasn't either.

Because their lives were happy before all of this. They—and Jason—had great childhoods, which seems unbelievable in Kim and Tommy's case, but that was the reality. And to lose that so suddenly, for everything they knew or _thought_ they knew to be turned on its head in one night—to be smacked across the face with the revelation that the people they love weren't at all who they thought? It was, and still is, devastating, and Kim's feelings where her dad is concerned are still infinitely more complicated than she can even begin to comprehend. Revisiting those old memories would be much more painful than pleasant.

Which is why Jason's decision to give them a picture of their family as it is now, but from _before_ it was broken, is such a thoughtful one. And he, truly, is the only one of the three of them who could have done this, the only one who could have stomached looking through all of those photos without breaking down.

Kim takes a deep breath in and out and smiles again, watching her mum in black and white: her dark hair a couple inches longer, the crow's feet at the corners of her eyes certainly more willing to smooth out than they are now, and a lightness to her that Kim's only started to see her exhibiting again in the last year and a half or so.

Jason takes the frames from each of them gently then, wrapping them up in their neat packages again with a wave of his wand before he places them carefully atop each of their rucksacks on the floor.

They spend another couple hours drinking and laughing. Later, with a sleepy kind of grin, Jason mutters, "Man, I'm so happy we did this."

Kim and Tommy both agree, big smiles all around, and a wild yawn takes Kim over for a moment immediately afterward. With a scoff, Tommy reaches over to ruffle her hair without warning, leaving it in a curtain hiding her face.

Now in a stringy kind of darkness, Kim blows an unimpressed puff of air out of the side of her mouth, causing a strand of it to whip upward momentarily before falling back down again.

She stacks both hands near her nose and parts her hair, feeling _very_ dramatic as she does so. "Was that necessary?"

Tommy smirks back at her. "Can't have you falling asleep on us, old lady."

Kim glares. "You are _eight_ months younger than me, you insolent—"

"Kids," Jason interjects, putting his newly-opened beer in his left hand and sticking his right arm out to separate them. "If I may. As the elder here, truly, I'd like to propose that we all have another pint and continue to enjoy each other's presence—"

Tommy throws a challenging look at her. "If eight months is all it's taken for you to become a crotchety old _bag_ —"

Kim's eyes light up. "A crotchety old—" she pauses, and her lip pulls back in a grin that's bordering a snarl.

"You heard me, grandma," Tommy chirps, clearly _delighted_ that she's riling her up. "Aren't you supposed to be keeping up the ageless vampire aesthetic? Doing the mysterious and inaccessible bit? Jase," she turns pointedly to him, who's gazing between the two of them looking both unimpressed and amused, "do you think there's a rule somewhere about whether or not dinosaurs can play in the IHC? Cause you'd think that—"

"I'll show you dinosaur, you _cheeky_ little—"

In a split second, Kim's pushed Jason's arm upward and flat-out _pounced_ on Tommy, putting both hands on her shoulders and pushing her back onto the floor so her head hits Jason's massive pillow with a soft _thud_.

Kim pins her like that, smirking with a kind of confidence that she only ever gets from Quidditch or alcohol, and Tommy looks stunned for a moment before she grabs her bicep and brings Kim right down with her.

And just like that, they're wrestling—rolling around in the huge pile of blankets between them and the dungeon floor and doing a good imitation of how they were acting as _seven-year-olds_ in the photo Jason gave them earlier.

"Young people these days," Jason mutters, shaking his head and getting to his feet. He starts to wave his wand repeatedly, first levitating all of their things out of the way then multiplying the blankets over and over to provide even more of a cushion, clearly looking to make sure neither Kim or Tommy get hurt as they grip and grumble at one another, each lost in trying to get the other to tap.

"Who's the old bag now? Getting a little wheezy there, love," Kim chimes, now holding Tommy in a headlock from behind, who struggles for a moment before tipping her entire body forward and throwing Kim over her shoulder, where she lands on her back—softly, thanks to Jason—in the thick padding of blankets with a groan.

And Tommy leaps on top of her, grabbing Kim's wrists and deftly using her hands to slap her in the face like an idiot. "Stop hitting yourself, Kimcam," she huffs, wearing a smug smile. "Poor dear, is that the dementia?"

Kim growls and manages to stop the flurrying attack, bringing a leg up and pushing Tommy down, and they go right back into their rolling, kicking, pushing, and pulling struggle.

"Kim — you can't — use — your — freaky — dancer's flexibility — in _combat_ —"

Kim huffs out a breath. "Okay—" with effort, she tries to pin Tommy's arm but can't, "one: combat my arse." She grabs at Tommy's leg and manages to hold on. "Two: I can't help if I'm adaptable."

She rolls them both, aiming for something in particular—her own open sleeping bag—and hits her mark. But Tommy has her hand plastered on Kim's face with the other gripping at the front of her crewneck, so Kim decides drastic measures are necessary and licks at her hand in order to get her to let go.

"Violation! Foul! We have a No Licking Rule!" Tommy cries, tipping her head back where she lays, chest heaving and exhausted.

"There are no rules here," Kim says, voice deliberately posh and ominous, and she goes to lurch backwards, intending to rise to her feet _dramatically_ , where she will zip Tommy up into the sleeping bag that's perfectly situated underneath her—

But Tommy slaps her hand out and buckles Kim's elbow as she goes to brace her weight on it, sending her collapsing heavily to the blanket-cushioned floor face-first, landing right beside Tommy and emitting a bit of a whine at her _genius_ evil plan not working.

"That woulda been good," Tommy mumbles, all at once sounding nearly half-asleep as she addresses the ceiling, "but y'never were great with balance." She pauses, leaving longer than usual gaps between her words. "At least day-to-day." She shoves Kim's arm lightly, tipping her head to the right to look in her eyes. "I hear that gets worse with old age, can you confirm?"

With her cheek still smushed into the blankets Kim juts her right arm out, smacking Tommy in the face weakly, and Tommy bends her own arm at an awkward angle to smack her back with the same force, which, admittedly, is not a whole lot.

Both completely exhausted, they go back and forth for half a minute, both slapping each other in a sluggish kind of way, neither willing to give the other the last hit.

"Knackered finally, you two?" comes Jason's sleepy voice, and his head must appear above them, because Kim can see his legs, and Tommy's eyes get a bit brighter when they swivel off of Kim to peer upward.

He bends down and wedges both hands under Kim then lifts up, tipping her over to roll her gently away onto her back, then once again onto her stomach. Plopping to the blanketed floor—which feels as plush as a thin mattress at this point—with a flourish, he situates himself in the newly vacated space, laying on his back with just enough room for there to be the slightest bit of a gap between the three of them.

Kim grunts, realising Tommy got the last hit in before Jason so _rudely_ rolled her away, and flops her arm across him, doing her best to use his weight as leverage to drag herself over enough to reach Tommy again.

Once Kim's made a bit of progress she makes a half-hearted swipe for her, which doesn't land.

Sighing heavily, Kim shifts over further so she's on her side right up against Jason, with half her body draped across him now, and reaches once more over, smacking Tommy's shoulder lightly.

"YESSSssss," Kim whispers, her voice coming out in a lisp because of how her face is squished against his chest. Victorious nonetheless.

He makes a little noise and brings his arm out from where it was pinned underneath her, wrapping it around to cuddle her up to him. And Tommy rolls over in a single elaborate heaving motion, which brings her toppling onto Jason to mirror Kim's position almost perfectly.

"Okay," Jason mumbles, eyes closed. "I want you both to put your hands on each other and say, 'Truce.'"

They both grumble, nothing intelligible whatsoever coming out of their mouths on account of the exhaustion and the beer working together to make them feel doubly intoxicated.

Jason seems to take that as it is, though he surely knows neither of them would ever cede to the other, and wraps his arm securely around Tommy just like he did with Kim, both of them with their heads resting on either side of his chest.

"Love you," he mumbles, to which he gets two still mostly unintelligible—but no less heartfelt—replies.

And Kim's passed out, proper, not a minute later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'by your side' by sade. such a good TUNE.
> 
> NOTE for all of you going 'what????' at the 'teenage mutant HERO turtles' — in the UK the BBC was freaked out by the _gasp_ violent connotations that came along with the word NINJA. alas! the [TMHT](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teenage_Mutant_Ninja_Turtles#Teenage_Mutant_%22Hero%22_Turtles) were born. mikey's nunchaku (aka nunchucks?) were also edited out cause that shit was banned from TV too. NOW! our chip has the nunchaku in this story because she wanted the costume weapons that were RIGHTFULLY HERS! she's also replaced mikey's TMHT grappling hook with... fluffy handcuffs. which, to be fair, have a grappling effect!!! (this was her argument. I think it's flawless)
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO ONCE AGAIN! HAPPY BELATED HALLOWEEN TO YOU ALL!
> 
> starting OFF! you have a look at the coolest puff party of the year. these kids are real big on the being together and having a good time thing. and! a glimpse of another couple HOUSE TRADITIONS! introducing... the Four Feats aka the team-based halloween drunk relay extravaganza! it's fun! it's silly! participation is optional! the points system is ridiculously complicated! and I'm happy to inform you that though you didn't see TOO much of it this time 'round, you'll see trini's legendary pong team in action... next halloween. in fifth year. fair warning for absolute madness.
> 
> also, The Chug! aka one of hufflepuffs highest honours. involves knocking back a half pint of beer to kick off the halloween festivities. ceremonial! good SHIT! and for those of you who dont drink, note that our boy cadwallader (aka one of the v talented hufflepuff chasers a year above trini) does not either! he had his water during the quidditch world cup afterparty and he has his water now! plenty of kids don't drink for a wide variety of reasons! 
> 
> that is to say I wanted to assure you that all these House things are often done with water instead of booze and everyone is COOL. this is HOUSE POLICY! BROS! (mind, I won't get into the rules for the Four Feats cause we don't have all day, but you DO have to have at least two alcohol-drinkers per team. for like, intoxicated hand-eye coordination reasons. must be fair lads.)
> 
> but yes. trini and her roommates have never begun the Chug before, just so you know. this is their first time and they are HONOURED AND DELIGHTED! and sharing it with cedric was like... they had to. he's the hogwarts champion now for gods sake (or, one of TWO with our boy harry), and THEY LOVE HIM VERY MUCH! SO OF COURSE THEY WOULD! he gets congratulated and fawned over all evening. but this is even BETTER!
> 
> also. sidenote. if you read the authors notes for ch. 17, I mention there that in the Far Away Fic Future a secondary character says, quote, 'kim flirts with anything that moves'. you've just met said secondary character! megan jones! FUTURE FRIEND!!!
> 
> now! to kim, jason, and tommy. our dumb kids. this is the first time they've been together on the anniversary of kim's dad and tommy's mom leaving. like, since it HAPPENED. reason being because the three of them had their friendship breakup, which you already know about. SO! this is a big deal, all of them being together for this. incidentally—even jason and tommy's BIRTHDAYS?!?! this year?!?! the first time kim's celebrated with them since everything went down. which is... gosh. it hurts my heart. so her sitting on the house table the way she did? between them, next to their birthday cake? in the middle of the fucking great hall? yeah. she missed them.
> 
> but yes. they have their little dungeon sleepover and are learning the steps to all of this again. but there's that EASE there with them that's so steeped in time and memory. & I know the picture descriptions were large blocks of text but I needed you to see them second-by-second. 
> 
> you also learn that kim's dad worked for gringotts back in the day, and tommy's mum was a healer at st. mungo's. more detail on all that later. ALSO! we have the first kind of... indication that kim/jason/tommy didn't just grow up near each other. their parents were all _best friends._ MY HEART! GOD! (note: you learn proper about how the parents met in the summer before seventh year. I know that's a ways off, but I dont make the rules!)
> 
> ...I _will_ tell you that kim's mum and tommy's mum were in the same healer residency class at st. mungo's! SIGH.
> 
> \---
> 
> we stopping there!
> 
> NEXT TIME ON GLEE: november begins, and trini and kim babysit a blast-ended skrewt. but oho! 'theyre not in the same class section!!!' you scream! alas, hagrid has a special after hours project for the fourth-years. canon too. keep an eye out for a princess bride reference. AND! trini finally withdraws a bit. was bound to happen—her instinct is to back away, remember!
> 
> <3 I appreciate you all to bits. take care, and until next time!


	22. Growing Pains

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/2N6bB5ck67CNILInUX1Ctw?si=4REM1ESTQpCgbigUHiIuyw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"'Take Care of Magical Creatures' they said. 'It will be _fun_ ' they said," Trini grumbles, her feet slipping and sliding in the cold wet grass, doing a better job at being _taken_ for a walk by her Blast-Ended Skrewt than taking it for a walk as directed.

"Stop being such a baby," Kim says through a little laugh, walking along beside Trini and her explosive companion with a clipboard. Jotting down whatever observations of the Skrewt's 'extraordinary behaviour' she can think of that might fit the criteria for what Hagrid is looking for with this assignment.

"Says you," Trini huffs, now digging her heels into the grass and trudging up more and more mud under her boots as she tries to brake. "Will you be taking over anytime soon, or am I going to spend the rest of my life like this?"

"I'm to observe and make notes," Kim answers airily, watching with a twinkle in her eye as Trini glares at her, body frozen and unimpressed as she slides comically along the ground at a turtle pace in the Skrewt's wake.

It's a Tuesday night, the first week of November, and all of the fourth-years taking Care of Magical Creatures are scattered around, halfway through their first session of the 'project' Hagrid has set—where they all come down to his cabin twice a week on Tuesday and Thursday evenings to make notes on the Skrewts. As if they weren't in enough Skrewt-related mortal peril already _once_ a week in class.

Kim, Trini and the boys have their Quidditch duffels (and brooms, in Trini, Kim, and Jason's cases) stashed safely right up against Hagrid's cabin, given they were hoping to get to play their regularly scheduled pick-up match this evening. None of them liked the odds of a Skrewt setting their kit on fire, so they elected to keep it all as far out of harm's way as possible.

Hagrid hadn't mentioned just how long they would be spending on this, but their chances of playing tonight before it's pitch dark are looking more bleak by the minute.

And Kim's certain that Trini would normally be happy about the prospect of learning more about any magical creature as part of an assignment. But she's doing a good impression of a water-skier at the moment, being towed along by her Skrewt like it has not a _clue_ that she's attached to it via the rope around its middle, and to Kim's amusement, it seems that Trini can't bring herself to be very enthused about the arrangement. This is not the sport she was hoping to participate in tonight.

Kim looks back towards Hagrid's cabin and squints in the dusk, trying to make out if the pairs have changed over yet, given she's supposed to switch places with Trini halfway through.

Instead, her eyes widen as she spots a speeding Skrewt... galloping? scuttling? towards them about fifty yards away, chased by no other than Billy, whose features are arranged in a bizarre kind of half horrified, half amused mid-laugh, like he's trying to decide how exactly he should be feeling about the situation.

And Kim sees why a moment later, when another Skrewt comes into view and Jason appears just behind Billy out of the twilight, chasing it with an almost identical expression on his face. Because a now-visible Zack is being pulled along smoothly by a rope behind the first speeding Skrewt, _cackling_.

The second Skrewt is coming up on his shoulder and moving just as quickly, with Mackenzie in tow, holding on for dear life via the coarse rope securely wrapped around one of her hands, long light brown hair streaming along behind her. She's also clearly having a _fantastic_ time, though, given she's egging her Skrewt on like they're in a dog sled race.

"COME ON HONEY YOU GOT THIS," Mackenzie yells, unable to do anything to spurn her Skrewt on except offer what Kim is sure are much-appreciated words of encouragement.

"NO WAY," Zack shouts, craning his head back to look at her. "ME AND _MATILDA_ HAVE THIS!"

"Matilda," Kim repeats drily, pure disbelief on her face. She looks back towards Trini, who has managed to halt their Skrewt's progress by charming the pile of mud that had built up in front of her boots to turn to stone. She's perched at an angle with all of her weight shifted backward, knees bent as the Skrewt continues to walk forwards, completely unaware that they've stopped. Slowly digging itself further into the slick mud.

Kim walks calmly up to Trini and offers her their clipboard with a smirk, holding out her other hand to grab the rope and take over. "I don't think it's about time to switch yet, but we might want someone heavier on the rope."

Trini gives her a puzzled look, grabbing her wand out of its holster and charming the rock in front of her to grow. Once it's fairly large, she carves a little eyelet into it carefully. "What do you mean?" she asks, tying the Skrewt rope through the loop in the rock and securing it.

Without a word, Kim turns around with a flourish and points in Jason, Billy, Zack, and Mackenzie's direction. They've got thirty or so yards to go before they pass by.

"What the _fuck_ ," Trini mutters, laughing at the sight. She pulls at their Skrewt's rope and nods once to herself, seemingly satisfied the stone anchor will hold, and walks past Kim, taking the clipboard lightly from her as she goes.

"See? Ours might want to join in on the fun," Kim explains. And indeed, just as she says it, their Skrewt seems to sense the others in a fuss nearby and starts running faster in place, now moving about a bit more erratically in what might be excitement.

Mackenzie and Jason's Skrewt gives a giant blast of sparks from its end then, which Mackenzie manages to just barely dodge with the manic smile never fading from her face.

"YESSSSS!" Mackenzie shouts, as she and her Skrewt rocket forward to pass Zack and Matilda. She thrusts a triumphant fist into the air before teetering precariously and grabbing the rope with both hands again.

"Admittedly, that looks sort of fun, no?" Kim mutters, tilting her head a little. Trini whirls around to look at her properly, jaw slightly open and squinting at her like she's never heard anything more ridiculous in her life.

"Of _course_ you think it looks fun, you—"

But Trini doesn't finish her sentence, because their _very_ excited Skrewt lets out a _BLAST_ that sounds through the night like a bottle rocket going off, shooting in the direction of the action; snapping the rope anchoring it in place completely and streaking away.

Kim's eyes widen. "Oh fuck."

Surely their Skrewt _escaping_ won't get them a good grade on this project.

And without thinking twice Kim starts sprinting after it, drawing her wand out of her forearm holster as she goes.

" _IMPEDIMENTA!_ " she shouts, brandishing her wand like a lasso at the Skrewt.

No dice, though — the spell bounces off of it with no effect. Kim huffs out a little whine, kicking at the ground even faster to try to catch up.

She and the Skrewt are coming together with Zack and the others at an angle, trajectory suggesting that they'll all be colliding shortly. And Kim strains her eyes to see just _how_ Zack and Mackenzie are being pulled along at such a speed without falling on their faces; after a moment (and with an astonished kind of bewilderment) she notes that they're both perched on what look to be pieces of wood.

Zack's is likely from a blasted-apart crate and Mackenzie's is undoubtedly an honest-to-god magically enlarged clipboard, easily identifiable by the huge metal alligator clip on the back. And the whole thing has seemingly been charmed to contort on the ends and sides, looking much like one of the plastic canteen trays Kim would use to carry her lunch around on in muggle school.

And Zack's, which she can see the clearest, also looks much too smooth to be natural...

Still sprinting, Kim smiles like an _idiot_. Because his has obviously also been magicked somehow, too; it has a lip at the front and it's well-shaped, like a giant popsicle stick.

Brain working fast, she points her wand at her and Trini's Skrewt, trying to aim for the now-short bit of frayed rope flailing around loosely behind it. " _Accio_."

The rope goes taut, coming out toward her like a pole suspended mid-air; but the charm does little to slow her Skrewt down, and after a few moments the line goes limp again.

But it's only just a bit faster than her, and with a head start, so Kim _really_ amps up her speed, pointing her wand and muttering, " _Engorgio_ ," to make the rope a half-length longer than it was before it snapped.

With that, she Summons it again, sticking her free hand out and wildly swiping through the air until she manages to grab it.

"HAH!" she huffs, now straining at keeping up and continuing to hold onto the rope at the same time. She can't manage this for long, and the Skrewt is stronger than her—

Noting that they're approaching the top of a little hill, Kim gets an idea. And with the brashness—or idiocy, she's not sure—of a Chaser, she makes her decision.

"Fuck it."

Throwing caution to the wind, Kim loops the rope around her left hand more securely and gets ready to point her wand at her black leather boots with her right.

_Wait, wait…_

As soon as Kim comes over the crest of the small hill and makes to descend again, she sends a prayer up to anyone who might be listening and _leaps_ into the air. Yells, with the others now right in front of them, " _WINGARDIUM LEVIOSA!_ "

It all feels like slow motion, falling for barely a foot until suddenly she's not—

She didn't realise she closed her eyes in expectation of a faceplant until she's jerked forward roughly, oddly off balance but definitely _not_ being dragged horizontal in the mud.

Kim opens her eyes. Looks down and lets out a little disbelieving huff of a laugh—her boots are levitating two feet off the ground and she's being pulled along by the Skrewt. The spell did what she intended, but she certainly didn't think this far ahead; it's like standing on a shaky platform at best, and to keep both of her boots levitating (and up high enough for one of them not to catch the ground on accident) already is proving to be incredibly difficult.

She's a giraffe on roller skates, one slip-up of concentration away from doing the splits. But at least she isn't running anymore, right?

"NICE ONE!" Billy calls, as Kim comes in to float along like a balloon—very precariously—beside him and Jason. Her Skrewt joins the other two happily up ahead, like a peculiar team of scorpion horses.

"HEY KIMBO!" Zack yells, twisting around a little. He has mud caked down the side of his face and in his hair, going down the length of his entire body. "HOW'S IT HANGIN'?"

Kim flashes a smile, eyes flicking up to him but not leaving her boots for long, needing to concentrate. Breathing quick with the adrenaline coursing through her body. "BRILLIANT! I'M GONNA JOIN YOU!"

And with that, she tugs herself forwards on the rope until there's enough slack to tie it around her waist. She does, and pulling at the knot, she faintly wonders if what she's about to do ranks supreme as one of the _stupidest_ things she's ever tried—which is saying something, in her case—as she raises her now-free left hand in front of her to help her visualise.

Furrowing her brow, Kim focuses as intently as she can on keeping her Levitation Charm up, wandless, as she stretches out her other hand to point her wand at the wood board Zack's situated on. " _Geminio_."

A replica board appears behind Zack and Kim Summons it to herself immediately, before it can go flying away behind them. Catching it, she quickly casts another Levitation Charm, guiding the board down to just beside her (miraculously still levitating) boots, using her wand like a conductor's baton.

Brow furrowed and legs shaking from trying to stay together, she works like a puppet master for a hurried few moments as she levitates her boots up another foot or so, then brings the piece of crate underneath her feet.

With her heart racketing in her chest, Kim lowers her boots so they brush the top of the wood and rotates herself so she's facing Zack instead of her Skrewt—

She grits her teeth and drops both charms simultaneously, putting more of her weight on the back so the front lip doesn't catch as she lands on the ground.

And then she's _going_ — casts a Sticking Charm on the bottom of her front boot for good measure, though that will certainly make it much more dangerous if she were to fall.

But it's more fun at the moment, so why not?

"BLESS YOU," comes Mackenzie's voice from Zack's other side, now leading the pack of the three of them. Clearly impressed.

"Yo, are we planning on stopping?" Kim yells at Zack, throwing a glance back at Billy and Jason, who are still—and admirably—running behind them.

"Tried," he shouts, smiling like a maniac. "No luck. Can't seem to land a spell from this angle."

Kim hears a happy little laugh from Jason, and she's about to turn her head to look at him again when another voice— _Trini's_ —calls out:

"Might need a bird's eye view, lads."

And Trini comes sailing into Kim's peripherals on her broomstick, just behind them and above. Looking smug. "Picked up these two hitchhikers on the way." She nods at Billy and Jason, both on broomsticks as well now and flanking either side of Trini with brilliant smiles on their faces.

"Oh sweet Jesus," Zack exclaims, eyes widening in delight. "Absolute _ledge_."

"Save your applause for when I stop this train," Trini says, furrowing her brow and urging her broom forwards. Once a few feet in front of the three Skrewts she twists around, wand in hand. Takes aim carefully at Zack's, very close to ensure she hits it, while Billy and Jason do the same to Kim and Mackenzie's.

" _IMPEDIMENTA!_ " the three of them shout, nearly in perfect unison. Their spells strike the Skrewts in the soft spaces between the grey shiny armour that they've grown in the past few weeks, freezing them in place, and Kim, Zack, and Mackenzie all let go of their ropes, each sliding forward in the slick mud for another few feet before coming to an entirely nonviolent stop.

Zack hops off his bit of crate and holds his hands up for Kim and Mackenzie, and they all do a wild high-five, whooping and cheering like idiots.

"Didn't know you had it in you, Hart," Mackenzie chimes, smiling wide with a twinkle in her eye.

Kim beams back and laughs lightly, taking a goofy bow. "Couldn't have ours escaping. I take my grades _very_ seriously."

Zack smiles at her then jerks his head at Trini. "Thanks for the save, T," he says, rubbing at the back of his neck with a pained grimace.

"Yeah, thanks Trini," Mackenzie echoes, pointing her wand at her massive clipboard and shrinking it back down to regular size. "Ours got away from Jason, here—" she waves her hand at him lazily, "and I ran after it. Couldn't spell it to stop, so I improvised."

"And _I'd_ tied my rope around my wrist, thinking I was all clever and shit until Matilda decided to shoot off after their Skrewt," Zack adds, now trying to wipe some of the dry caked mud off his face. "She dragged me a good way before I Summoned that bit of crate and got up."

"I think they're in love," Jason drawls, sighing lightly as he hovers on his broom beside Trini and Billy. "Better get them back before they start copulating."

"Good call. Nobody wants to see that shit," Trini mutters, looking down at the Skrewts, who are still frozen completely from the spells.

Jason and Billy both nod and point their wands again, using Hover Charms on their Skrewts to levitate them off the ground.

"Meet you back there, yeah?" Kim says to Trini, who's smiling at her.

Trini nods, and the three of them urge their brooms back towards Hagrid's cabin, taking the Skrewts along.

Kim lets out a little huff and jerks her head. "Shall we?" Zack and Mackenzie nod, and the three of them begin the walk back.

"Well, I think this counts as 'extraordinary behaviour', don't you?" Zack says after walking for a bit, stretching lavishly.

Mackenzie chuckles, bringing a half scrunched-up, half folded page of parchment out from a pocket in her robes. She flattens it out onto her clipboard (now free of mud and back to its regular size) and pins it down with the alligator clip. "Hagrid's gonna _love_ this. It's like a little love story."

"And then our Skrewt, the third wheel," Kim chirps, rubbing at the line of angry red skin on the palm of her left hand that's been rubbed raw with rope burn.

Zack throws an innocent smile her way. "It probably figured being a third wheel to some Skrewts was better than continuing to observe your date with Trini."

Kim has a very strong urge to smack him upside the muddied head, but she's not sure if they're quite there yet in their friendship. "You know, I'd jinx you, but I think you've already been dragged around in the mud enough today."

"It's a compliment, Hart," Mackenzie says, shrugging. "Girl saved our arses, after all, and in the most rad way possible. If you're not gonna date her, I volunteer."

"Go for it," Kim says lightly. Pauses, clenching her jaw. "You two would be cute together, I'd expect."

Mackenzie hums. "You're probably right. I'm hot, she's hot... but if I'm honest, she might be a little _too_ punk for me—so much anger in such a small person..." she trails off, shrugging. "I can't compete with that kind of energy, mate. My type is more on the emo side."

"So more like Kim, then," Zack chimes, and Kim really does smack him on the shoulder this time.

Mackenzie smiles. "Well, we already said that the last name change would be easy, just a little bit longer..."

"Or a little bit shorter," Kim deadpans, smirking.

Mackenzie gasps softly, clutching her chest. "Are you proposing? About time."

"YES! MAWWAIGE!" Zack exclaims, in a perfect imitation of the priest in _The Princess Bride_.

Kim laughs, and Mackenzie seems to get the reference, too, taking her page of parchment Skrewt notes off her clipboard and tapping it with her wand to stick the top two corners together, then placing it atop her head like a papal mitre hat. It promptly falls over her eyes, perched on the tip of her nose, and she grins like an idiot.

"'MAWWAIGE IS WHAT BRINGS US TOGETHER!'" she recites, holding her arms out in front of herself and walking forward blindly, now.

Kim shakes her head, laughing. "Is it possible to be uninvited to your own wedding?" she muses, reaching over and flicking the parchment with a _thwap,_ which gives Mackenzie a start. "And Zack, you're _certainly_ not coming."

"Man, I'll officiate," Zack says, straightening his spine. "Then take advantage of the open bar."

"Same. I'm gonna be _so_ drunk at our wedding," Mackenzie chimes, now flailing her arms about in search of guidance and finding Zack's forearm. "Absolutely pissed. Catch me in the back dancing on a table."

They start to pass some of their classmates as they get closer to Hagrid's, most still struggling in vain with their Skrewts. A _smack_ of an explosion rings out here and there, and once they're closer, Billy approaches them with Kim's _Nimbus 2001_ in hand, looking guilty. "I promise I didn't get it muddy, Kimberly."

Kim waves him off. "You're welcome to have a go any time, you know that. Especially on a rescue mission."

Jason and Trini come walking in behind him, both carrying their broomsticks, and look from Mackenzie and her hat to Zack, to Kim, then back again. "Er, you guys have a good walk?" Jason asks, perplexed.

"Kim and I are getting married," Mackenzie announces, still not making to remove her headgear. "She proposed. I cried."

"It was beautiful," Zack chirps, miming wiping a tear from his eye.

Kim rolls her eyes and shakes her head, smiling, and meets Trini's gaze, who's looking at her with a curious expression. They stare at each other for a moment and Trini raises her eyebrow, just slightly, asking something that Kim can't make out.

It's certainly teasing, but the look feels almost... _suggestive_ , and Kim registers a blush creeping up her neck, reddening her ears.

Thankfully, with her already-present flush from the chilly early November air, she's sure it's not noticeable.

.

The following day Trini and Kim leave Ancient Runes in the way that has become typical, both yawning in tandem. Slowly coming back into proper awareness after being put into a lullaby kind of trance by Professor Babbling's soothing voice.

They're chatting and walking their normal route through the castle when Trini goes to diverge, intending on directing her steps towards her common room instead of the library. She's been feeling overwhelmed lately, and though she's fairly sure it isn't because of anything Kim, Jason, Billy, and Zack—the two latter most definitely not—are doing, the urge to withdraw has been tugging at the back of her mind.

She suspects it might be an over-stimulation thing, or just the _thought_ of getting in too deep, friendship-wise. And she's certainly aware that the feeling is illogical and slightly paranoid, but doing a dip and vanishing without warning has always been her signature move.

Which is why Trini finds herself no longer heading in the direction of the library (though she's not sure she would even be able to explain _why_ she's feeling this way if asked).

Kim begins following her without apparent second thought, yawning again and chattering away about a maneuver she read about in _Quidditch Through the Ages_ that she intends to spring on Zack in their next scrimmage match.

"Er, Kim," Trini interjects, not unkindly. Slows her steps a bit and pulls over on one of the staircase landings as to not be swept up in the steady stream of students on their way to next period. "Are you... coming downstairs, then?"

Kim blinks rapidly and stops talking, perking up and looking about in a way that suggests she's presently found herself on a different continent than expected. Trini waits, a small amused smile threatening to emerge on her lips that she manages to keep down.

"Are we going downstairs?" Kim asks, still looking more puzzled than is probably necessary. Her eyes are warm, though, and Trini all at once has the urge to not retreat at all.

No—with this look from Kim, all she can find herself thinking about is one word:

 _Stay_.

Internally, Trini tries to slap the gay out of herself a few times.

_You don't need to be with her every minute. Chill._

Trini shakes her head. "I mean, I can drop you off at the doors to the dungeons? But I'm going to my common room." Pauses, just for a heartbeat. "Not coming to the library today. My bad for not saying anything."

For someone who still looks like they're in the process of working out a complex mental maths problem, Kim seems to recover quickly. "Oh, cool! I'll er, just show you that play another time then."

Trini tries to put sincerity into her voice when she replies, "Yeah, sure."

With that, Kim gives her a small, genuine smile and turns off the landing into a corridor, speed-walking a short way down before disappearing into a passage that Trini didn't even realise was there.

Trini blinks a couple times, mutters, "Huh," and makes to continue descending the Grand Staircase with everyone else. A comforting anonymity washes over her within seconds and she sighs as she walks, feeling the same kind of unimpressed with herself as she does whenever she hears a Madonna song on the radio.

Explanation: she really _shouldn't_ be annoyed at herself for finding 'Vogue' super catchy; it's music snob rubbish to shame that kind of thing. But she can't help but huff at her wiring sometimes, thinking it would be easier to keep her Cool Kid credibility up if she didn't feel like every cell in her body had the overwhelming urge to _DANCE_ like a fucking maniac as soon as that stupid song starts to play.

It's the same presently: this warm relief at being one person amongst a crowd, at Kim being gone, at being _alone_ is something Trini wishes she could override. Introvert brain be damned; it would certainly be easier to make friends if she could just... not have that as her default.

She sighs again, hopping a step just because. Registering a lightness in her body leaking over from the calm she feels, now, as she descends through the castle at a leisurely pace.

People say hello here and there and she gives them little waves, a small smile, pleasant interactions abounds. It's like plugging back into the castle's stereo system, part of it all again; refreshing, safe, familiar. For a little while, back outside of her recently-settled world with Kim and the boys.

As Trini comes onto the marble staircase landing, Hufflepuff's Keeper Dustin falls into step beside her with a jaunty little shuffle. Flashes his warmest grin. "Hey, Smalls."

"Sup."

"Eh, long day," he replies, shrugging. "Going down?"

"Yeah."

"Brilliant."

They walk the rest of the way to the basement together, chatting and joking around, and come through the common room entrance to find it in a gentle buzz. Trini takes a happy breath in and out and, after bidding goodbye to Dustin, sees a familiar trio sat by the fire.

She smiles as she walks through the common room, replying to her roommates' greetings with a playful grunt as she goes, intending to make a stop at her dorm to drop some of her stuff off and change into comfortable clothes.

A few minutes later Trini collapses into the empty spot next to Summer on one of the squashy leather sofas, tipping her head to rest on the back. "Yes. This is good."

"What's the craic, babe?" Gia asks, voice warm to match the atmosphere around them.

In lieu of a reply Trini just grunts and rotates to lay down, resting her head in Summer's lap with a heavy sigh. She smushes the side of her face into the red tartan blanket there, feeling the happy heat from their proximity to the crackling fireplace, and Summer adjusts her legs gently under the blanket to give her a better pillow.

Gia tries again, "You going to answer?"

"No," Trini murmurs, voice small.

"Okay."

Chip reaches over from the couch adjacent and squeezes Trini's socked foot gently, just once. The three of them resume their conversation, knowing after all these years that she will talk when she's ready. Summer's hand drifts down to run soothing fingers through her hair, and Trini's body relaxes as she lays there, listening to their voices like a familiar song on an old radio; drifting into a half-conscious sleep to the tune of an endless melody that she may not know by heart, but has listened to countless times. She knows the instruments, knows how they play together, yet always finds herself struck by the sound; so much beauty resounding in the ordinary—a symphony in a soup can.

Some time later Trini registers being carried, face nuzzled into warm robes full of that sweet and smoky fireplace smell that gets stuck in the back of the nose (to no protest, from most), and something citrus-y that her groggy brain informs her means Summer.

The next thing she knows, she's under what seems to be both Chip's red tartan blanket and her own warm bed quilt. Flitting her eyes open, she finds the familiar sight of the low, gently-domed light stone ceiling above her bed that always promotes that comforting feeling of being surrounded, like she's safe inside a cave of some kind (or a badger's sett, in this case). The burnished copper lamp that hangs there from a chain is unlit; her curtains are drawn.

When Trini's brain kicks into gear proper, a tiny pang of dread hits her heart.

Had she slept through the night and into the day? Missed her lessons?

She rolls over to face the back rough stone wall of her bed nook, intending to check the clock situated in the little square alcove there that serves as a nightstand. Instead of finding the time, though, there's a note _Spellotaped_ to the front of it in Gia's handwriting, just enough light coming through from the rest of the dorm for Trini to make it out:

If this note is here it means it's WEDNESDAY still (so calm down!) and we've gone up to supper. Will bring you something back down, pup.

Trini smiles and flips the note up gently, reaching for her clock to make sure it's set for the morning just in case. With a content, blissful sigh she pulls her blankets up around her chin, hearing Sabre purring near her knee. Reveling in the dark cool quiet until she falls asleep once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'growing pains' by alessia cara. 
> 
> gia's question of 'what's the craic' is irish [slang](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=What%27s%20the%20craic%3F) for 'how's it going?' more or less. trini's very familiar with these expressions by now, of course.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO! we have entered november! hope you enjoyed that silly bit there with the skrewts. couldn't pass up on trini and kim dealing with them together. and a little bit of one-on-one interaction is always nice!
> 
> I'm sure some of you have already noticed this in past chapters, but you see our kim do quite a bit of wandless magic here. now, if you're familiar with HP canon... that's not something incredibly common in the UK. at all. we hear about it when referring to Very Powerful Wizards, but the overwhelming majority of wizard Brits use wands. 
> 
> NOW. like most purists, I use JKR's writings as canon (word of god, dudes) along with the books, which INCLUDES pottermore and such. she's done a bit on other magical schools, and if you read up on them at all, you'll notice that wandless magic is thought of as very standard/normal in other parts of the world. notably within quote 'the entire african continent' aka 54 countries, lads. 
> 
> that all said — remember that these rangers kids look like their [actors](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/87/76/03/877603cad546274a1c71d75502bc9e83.jpg) in the 2017 movie (that pic left to right is jason, zack, kim, trini, billy). so our kim looks like our lord and saviour naomi scott, given she's the actor for the pink ranger. I've tried to keep each of the kids' racial backgrounds as close to the real life actors as I can because that shit is important! and having a diverse team is SO cool to see. 
> 
> which means! our kim is half indian/half white like naomi scott, with her mother born in _uganda_. which just so happens to be in africa, for those of you who don't own a map. I WONDER WHAT THAT MEANS EH?
> 
> (hint--think about where her mum would have been educated, and what that would mean for her spellcasting. kim explains further in january of year 4. we are in november now. not too far away!)
> 
> but yes. otherwise, we have trini soaring in on a broom to the save the day, and kim being very WOW along with everyone else in the vicinity. what a kid!
> 
> also, trini doing the withdraw—like I said in the last authors notes—was bound to happen. she's been spending a good amount of time with kim and the boys, and there will be days where she wants to go back to her 'normal'. that is OKAY! and doesn't mean there's anything wrong, necessarily. just trini's way of recharging.
> 
> she certainly still spends a ton of time with her roommates and her quidditch team, of course. but her, kim and the boys have established a bit of a routine with spending their group free periods in the library lately, and there will be times where that doesn't happen for whatever reason! just trying to be realistic with how these 5 get to know each other and interact—it's not like, a meet then they're glued at the hip type of scenario. quite close, but they still have lives otherwise! :)
> 
> \---
> 
> up next: a relatively kim-focused pair of chapters. I think I might put two of them up at once, but we shall see. after those, we have the first HOGSMEADE trip of the year. and remember what kim said to trini before their first quidditch pick-up match? she owes her a drinkkkkkk! we get some _serious_ one-on-one trimberly interaction. lifechats, friends!
> 
> thank you all for reading and commenting. please feel free to shout at me ALWAYS! I love it! doesn't have to be like, groundbreaking input or anything either. any comments or kudos or just GENERAL READERSHIP sparks so much joy! 
> 
> I also noticed we passed 100k recently, which is awesome. go team! applause to you for sticking with this thing, and until next time <3


	23. Evolve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/0yeCYP2FxoRgHOz0XV3Wsd). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Is this seat taken?" comes a gruff, unfamiliar voice.

Kim looks up from her Charms book. To her utter surprise, Viktor Krum stands above her, looking glum. Over his shoulder is his ever-present entourage—a gaggle of girls—lurking nearby in the stacks, watching him unabashedly with sly smiles on their faces.

And the library is certainly not very busy—it's the second week of November, far enough from midterms but not close enough to the final sprint before winter break to be crowded. It's Kim and Billy's shared free period and they're still in school hours, meaning there are plenty of empty tables around them; Kim resists furrowing her brow and keeps her face blank as she glances at Billy, who's looking between her and Krum curiously. He shrugs lightly, and she takes that as permission enough.

"Er, no," Kim replies, making sure to keep to a low volume as to not incur the wrath of Madam Pince. She gestures to the six empty seats at their table casually and Krum nods once, seemingly considering them all for a moment before situating himself in the seat closest to her, on her right. Given Kim tends to spend this particular free period in Zack's seat, he's parked himself right in Trini's usual spot.

Kim makes an effort to be as nonchalant as possible, all the while internally _screaming_ at the fact that a very famous, incredibly talented Quidditch player has decided to sit at their table.

Krum begins taking his stuff out of his bag and she goes back to her Charms book, not wanting to turn all super-fan on him or anything.

After realising she's read the same sentence over half a dozen times, though, she finds her mind unable to focus as she contemplates his choice to sit with them.

Because admittedly, it might get to be a lot after a while—someone nearly their age unable to be a 'regular' teenager. As Kim knows very well, anonymity can be just as comforting as it is isolating; being exceedingly well-known very likely could be the same kind of deal.

In her peripherals, Kim sees the group of girls start to move in their direction as one, and she slowly turns her head to stare right at them. Krum besides, she's sure Billy wouldn't be comfortable with having all of them at their table, and to be sure, she doesn't want them sitting down either.

Krum _certainly_ doesn't, evidenced by him sitting here—of all places—in the entirety of the library. He's clearly looking for some quieter company, and Kim's seen him sitting alone enough times to know that the girls tend to group around his desk, talking despite him politely stating that he has work to get done.

So she takes a deep breath and stares the girl at the front of the group down, face impassive. When the girl meets her eyes but keeps walking their way, Kim shakes her head side to side, almost imperceptibly.

It takes a few tense moments, and Kim's a bit proud of herself at the result—though she probably shouldn't be—because she's still got it, apparently: the girl holds her gaze before letting out an annoyed huff and leading the rest of them away, walking the length of the library and out towards the doors.

Directing her attention back down to her book with a tiny bit of pride stirring in her chest, Kim finds it fairly easy to get absorbed in her reading again.

A few minutes later, she's almost forgot Krum is there entirely when he turns his head towards her. "Thank you for letting me sit here," he says lowly, looking at Billy as well.

Billy looks up from his History of Magic essay curiously, eyebrows raised, then seems to register what Krum said. "You're welcome," he replies, giving a small smile.

Kim looks at Krum and he meets her eyes. Shrugs casually. "No problem," she echoes.

Billy hums. "If you see the two of us here in the future—" he looks at Kim questioningly, silently asking to speak for her, and she gives a tiny nod, smiling, "you're welcome to join us."

Krum's eyes are a bit warmer as he looks between the two of them, and he gives a curt nod back. "I vill probably take you up on that, if that is alright."

"Of course," Kim says, the corner of her mouth pulling up a little in effort to look welcoming. She turns back to her book then, nearly done it, finally.

.

Two days later Kim, Jason, and Zack are descending further into the dimly-lit dungeons with a hearty group of Gryffindor and Slytherin fourth-years in tow a few flights of stairs back; many dragging their feet on account of how attending Potions lessons these days seems to fill them all with even _more_ dread than usual.

The very real threat of being poisoned looming over you week after week is quite mentally exhausting, turns out.

Coming to the entrance of the corridor that contains Snape's depressing classroom, Kim's ears perk up at an apparent disturbance up ahead—complete with Malfoy, Pansy, and their group of gits, all wearing the badges that Kim saw them working on in the common room last night.

She never lingers in the common room anymore so she didn't see what they said then, but it's easy now, given it's shining off the walls in the low light: 'POTTER STINKS'.

Kim sighs, straightening her spine as she walks down the corridor with Jason and Zack slightly behind. As the three of them get around halfway to the classroom, there's suddenly shouting—

Streaks of light as spells shoot off—

Then a hand between her shoulder blades, pushing her to the floor firmly—

In a kind of bowed kneel now, Kim's view of the corridor ahead is blocked, though she registers the flashes of light as the spells ricochet off the walls before striking... two people, if the following yell and whimper are anything to go by.

Kim looks up then, the hand on her back relinquishing pressure and turning to more of a hesitant touch, to note that both of the boys have come around in front of her.

And she finds not Jason's hand on her back but _Zack's_ , who is in a half kneel, half squat directly in front of her, posture solid: one knee on the floor, right arm pointing steadily ahead, wand drawn.

Jason is mirroring his position to the left, in a crouch with his own wand trained in the same direction as Zack's, the two of them together blocking her entirely from any possible harm with their bodies.

"Sorry, Kim," Zack mutters, voice apologetic but uncharacteristically tense.

Ahead, there's another shout—more panicked this time—followed by a small, terrified cry.

The three of them get to their feet then, Jason first and offering hands to them both, to see Snape emerge out of the classroom and into the dim corridor like a bat out of hell, cloak billowing around his calves as he strides out.

For the countless time Kim wonders if he _magicks_ it to do that on purpose, if he gets up in the morning and thinks to himself, ' _What could I do to look more like a cheap vampire knockoff today?_ '

Or maybe he just _looks_ like that, which is much more unfortunate.

Snape's monotonous drawl carries out toward them, indistinguishable, and there are more angry shouts, presumably trying to explain what just happened.

They're followed by a brief pause before Snape's voice sounds again.

"Hospital wing, Goyle," he drones, ever disinterested.

And Kim kind of shoves the boys—nicely—to get them to continue to walk forward. As the three of them resume their approach, Jason and Zack are standing much closer together than usual, shoulders right up against one another, clearly coiled for another try at Let's Push Kim To The Floor.

_What was that about, anyway?_

She hears voices from behind them as the rest of the Slytherins and Gryffindors arrive, and a beat later Gregory Goyle is walking towards them in a quick stride, away from the scene of the commotion, looking more annoyed than afraid at the boils that seem to have appeared all over his face.

"What the—" Jason mutters, drawing his wand from his pocket, where he had been gripping it discreetly in case of more trouble. As if he's expecting Goyle to lash out at them.

And Zack hums an acknowledgement, his left hand curling into a fist. His wand hand kind of twitches at the wrist, like he's giving Goyle a warning.

Kim can't help but feel a bit warmer, because though how they're acting is completely unnecessary, Jason's been in her corner her entire life—always like a fiercely protective older brother, ready to throw down at the drop of a hat if the situation ever arose. And the situation _did_ arise. Plenty of times. He went to the mat for her always, despite her trying to talk him out of it.

But here _Zack_ is now, willingly throwing himself out in front of her to protect her from perceived danger, pushing her to the floor to keep her safe. Kim's struck by it, unsure what she did to deserve this kind of treatment from him, unable to determine when exactly she earned that kind of respect, that kind of loyalty.

And in the back of her mind, she wonders just _when_ Jason informed Zack that there was a chance some idiot Slytherins would try to attack her—whether verbally or physically—in the corridors. Because Jason's clearly told him to be on the lookout, that she was at risk, that she was a target; evidenced by how he just responded to all of that, how both boys assumed the spells were meant for her.

Kim sighs. And as she figured he would, Goyle passes them all wordlessly, likely on the way up to the hospital wing at Snape's insistence.

"Malfoy got Hermione! Look!" someone shouts. Weasley, maybe.

Kim can't _see_ over Jason and Zack but there's soon a cacophony of shrill, cruel laughter echoing through the corridor, a sound that makes her skin crawl, makes her heart hurt for Granger, who she's certain is being mocked—

And Kim, at once in a blaze of anger, refusing to stand by while someone is bullied a few feet away from them, elbows her way around Jason, her own wand in her hand, determined to jinx every one of those girls' tongues to the roof of their mouths—

But Snape's voice sounds, words that she can't pick out, and then Granger is sprinting up the corridor towards them, evidently hit by one of the spells from earlier given how her teeth have grown past her collarbone. She weaves between Zack and the wall with tears running down her face, looking humiliated.

Kim's head snaps around, anger turning to sadness as she watches her move down the corridor and out of sight, and then Potter and Weasley are shouting some _very_ colourful things at Snape.

The two of them lose fifty points for their House in total, an announcement which is met by a heavy, dramatic sigh from Jason.

They walk into the dungeon with the rest of the class, the latecomers behind them quickly asking around about what happened, and Kim, Jason, and Zack plop down at their tables—Zack at the one beside theirs, with Mackenzie, Will, and Sky occupying the other three seats. As soon as he sits down all three girls immediately start asking him what the hell happened, looking concerned. Rose and Rocky come sailing in opposite Kim and Jason and do the same.

Jason leans over their table, trying to be discreet as he gives the brief of it in a low voice. Meanwhile, Kim looks around at everyone, her gaze falling on Potter and Weasley.

Potter's at a table, looking murderous but _alone_ , which strikes her as odd. Neither him or Weasley look like they're going to follow, though.

Kim frowns, eyes finding Parvati Patil and... her friend, whose name she doesn't know.

(Jason says she's kind of a prat, anyway. Not that Kim's in any place to judge.)

_Surely one of them is going to go check on her?_

Maybe it's because Kim has so much experience with bullying—from both sides of it, to be sure—that she can't accept the idea of Granger somewhere alone, crying and upset after what just happened.

Kim sighs. This _really_ isn't her problem.

Another few moments and she waits, hoping someone will get up under the guise of pretending they have to go to the bathroom or something...

But Snape's about to start the lesson, so she sighs again, deeply, and leans into Jason. "I'll be back. Going to find her."

Jason frowns, though his eyes are soft. "Kim—"

"Mate, nobody _else_ is going," she whispers, knowing exactly what he was about to say. "I just— I know what that's like, you know? She shouldn't be alone."

Jason blinks slowly, then nods like he understands. Grips her hand once, lets go.

Because Kim certainly does know what it's like—a large part of how she learned the castle and the dungeons _so_ well was by continuously having to find secluded places to go cry, after all. Always in the wake of an incident like the one that just happened.

Where Kim was the target, to be sure. And more deliberately.

But hers was torment that she very much deserved, brought on by her choices, her transgressions, her mistakes. Though that reality certainly didn't make it hurt any less at the time. Or now, that she's thinking about it.

Kim sighs, grabbing a travel packet of tissues from her rucksack and stowing them in a pocket of her robes before getting up and leaving her books and bag behind. She crosses the room, aiming for Snape as some of the class is still clambering into their seats, quick chatter lingering all around at what just occurred in the corridor.

"Professor, may I go to the bathroom?" Kim asks, arranging her face into a look of slightly pained indifference. "I'm feeling a bit ill."

She expects to have to use the tried and true, ever-effective Period Card, but to her surprise he just gives her a nod. "Very well, Miss Hart."

"Thank you, Professor."

With that she strides out of the dungeon, giving Pansy a look of icy disapproval as she goes.

Pansy stares back at her for a moment before backing down, averting her eyes, and Kim's mouth ticks up into a smug smirk as she sails by.

_Winner, winner, chicken dinner._

And she really shouldn't be proud of herself for glaring someone into submission, but she can't bring herself to care.

Walking back out into the chilly corridor, she perks her ears up, trying to listen for any sounds of crying. Though Granger likely would have gone straight to the hospital wing.

But feeling that awful and _hurt_ can override logic, sometimes—where all you can think, feel, is that you have to hide. Some kind of animal instinct, maybe.

Kim begins to ascend the staircase, figuring Granger wouldn't go down, given it's a rarity for students from any House but Slytherin to venture deeper into the dungeons than they have to.

Which Kim has never understood, really. She's always liked the quiet.

After a few flights she catches it, and even with her hearing being notably awful—as she's been told plenty of times—she can make out soft sobs coming from the corridor ahead.

Kim makes an effort to be quiet, picking up her feet and walking along, following the sound until she comes to a tiny unused dungeon classroom.

She pokes her head in through the partially open door: Granger's there on the floor in the dark, cross-legged, crying into her hand. Kim knocks on the door quietly, not looking to startle her.

Hermione's head snaps up, wipes at her teary eyes hastily. "If you're looking for Goyle, he's not here," she says weakly (though she's clearly trying to sound curt). Her voice is muffled by her still-growing teeth, which have slowed down to more of a creep than a lurch.

Kim shakes her head. "Why would I be here for Goyle?" she says softly, holding her gaze.

Regarding Hermione silently, Kim expects that her comment was defensive; the first thing that came to her mind, not necessarily rational. Certainly uncharacteristic, given her and Kim are normally on friendly terms.

But Kim really can't blame her.

Hermione looks away, eyes full of tears. "Then if you're here to make fun of me, I really don't want to hear it."

Kim's brow furrows. She thought her reputation was improving a little.

"I'm not looking to give you a hard time," Kim says gently, then reaches into her robes slowly, bringing out the packet of tissues as she walks over to stand above her. "Here."

There's a solid few moments where Hermione kind of just stares at the packet, eyes squinting a little. Not making to take it.

And, oh.

 _Oh_.

She can't see through her tears, it seems.

"They're tissues, and I promise they're not jinxed," Kim explains, then pauses, deciding to test a theory. "And it's... _I'm_ Kim Hart, by the way," she adds softly, voice quick. "Not sure if you can see me very well, given it's dark as, well, a dungeon — erm, I'm a friend of Jason Scott and Zack Taylor, and you and I were partners for that Muggle Studies project last year. We interact a bit here and there... I swear I'm not here to bother you. Just wanted to check if you're alright, and I'm sorry for intruding—"

"Kim," Hermione interrupts, taking the tissues and beginning to wipe at her face. After a moment, her eyes are looking less like puddles, and as she peers up at Kim, there's _much_ more warmth there.

"Er, yes?"

"You guessed right—I didn't know it was you. Thought you were Pansy," she explains, voice still off on account of the teeth.

"Ah. Yikes."

The comment does what Kim intended, and Hermione's eyes brighten a little before she mutters, "Sorry." Now sounding a bit teasing.

Kim runs with it. "I'm going to transfigure my voice somehow, now. If you think I can pass for her..."

"Well, if anyone our age could manage that kind of Transfiguration magic, it'd be you."

Kim blinks, stunned at the flattery. "Oh, come off it. Let's avoid statements like that until you and I've had the opportunity to properly compete, yeah?" She pauses, voice becoming something goofy and wistful, "I'll permit it after I _crush_ you in two years, when we're in the same N.E.W.T. section, at long last."

Hermione goes to laugh but stops, hissing at the apparent pain the spell is now causing in her teeth.

Kim frowns. "Let's get you up to the hospital wing, okay?"

But Hermione shakes her head. "Give it another ten minutes. The less people who see me like this, the better."

"They're still growing, Hermione," Kim says gently, squatting down in front of her. "Going to hurt worse the longer you sit here."

Hermione shrugs. "I can deal with it."

Kim groans softly, shaking her head as she considers. "Listen, if you won't go yet, will you at least let me try to stop them from continuing to grow?"

"I tried already, but the spell won't work," Hermione mutters, clearly frustrated at her lack of success.

"What did you try?"

" _Finite Incantatem_."

Kim tilts her head. "That's the one I was gonna use." She pauses, considering. "I don't see why it wouldn't work — I didn't hear the spell that hit you, but I'd expect this is _Densaugeo..._? which really should calm the fuck down at _Finite_."

Hermione smiles again, holding back a chuckle. "My thoughts exactly."

Kim nods once, meets her eyes. "Let me try it. My guess is on account of your... current predicament, you can't pronounce it properly."

After seemingly considering for a moment, Hermione hums. "Yes, actually. I think you may be right."

Kim draws her wand, shifting a bit to rest one of her knees on the cold stone floor. "Ready? Just to stop them—I won't try anything fancy, promise."

"Okay," Hermione whispers, screwing her eyes shut.

Before she can change her mind Kim points her wand with a steady hand. " _Finite Incantatem_ ," she says clearly, focusing hard.

And to both of their surprise, the teeth not only stop growing but begin to shrink, coming back up from where they had nearly reached her abdomen to just above the base of her neck.

Kim smiles, pleased. "I won't try anything further—Pomfrey will sort it. But the pain should be a bit less now, if you're determined to wait it out."

Hermione feels at them, smiles. "Thank you."

Kim nods once then plops down beside her abruptly. "So," she starts, voice playful as she makes a show of peering around at the nearly pitch dark, chilly dungeon, "you come here often?"

Once again, she succeeds at lightening the mood slightly, and Hermione offers a little, surprised smile.

.

Kim escorts her up to the hospital wing then makes her way back down to the Potions classroom, re-entering twenty minutes or so after she left. She breezes in, makes eye contact with Snape—who gives her a small nod as he drawls on—then takes her seat beside Jason.

"Success?"

"Success," she says quietly.

"Good, K."

Five minutes later or so Snape's lecturing ceases, and a little glint appears in his beady eyes as he looks around at them all and says, "Antidotes! You should all have prepared your recipes by now. I want you to brew them carefully, and then we will be selecting someone on whom to test one..."

"Moment of truth," Kim murmurs, digging into her bag for the antidote recipe the five of them came up with together. Jason nods, pulling his identical recipe out, and is about to light the fire under his cauldron when there's a knock at the door.

A tiny Gryffindor boy enters and begins talking back and forth with Snape. Within a minute, Potter is speeding out of the classroom, off to take Triwizard pictures for the _Daily Prophet_. As he goes, 'POTTER STINKS' flashes at him from multiple directions.

After the interruption Snape seems in an even worse mood than usual, gliding around and breathing down everyone's necks as they brew their potions.

There's a palpable tension in the room the entire time, and at the tail end of the lesson an hour later, Snape chooses Rocky as his first victim.

(To be sure, Rose—who watches the whole display with a look of calculated indifference on her face, chewing her pink bubblegum and popping it a few times—helped him with his antidote.)

Kim watches Rose watch Rocky, with the slight narrowing of her dark eyes the only indication that she's concerned. Though she really shouldn't be, given her memory is absolutely _insane_ , and she could likely brew any of these potions—provided she read the recipe through once before—without having to reference a sheet. Rose's memory is nothing short of encyclopaedic, to the point of people joking that it alone is a superpower.

With her help, Rocky comes out unscathed; at worse, he looks a bit pale for a moment before peering up at Snape timidly, who doesn't even try to mask his look of complete disappointment.

And Kim figures Rocky's paleness is more from the anxiety over being _poisoned_ , rather than a reaction to the antidote.

With that the class is finally over, and Snape barks at them to bottle up a sample of each of their potions, no doubt looking for a good, harsh grading session to channel his wrath.

They all take their phials to his desk obediently before packing up and exiting the room, more than a few sighs escaping the other students around them at being free of him until next week.

"Good going," Zack says, punching Rocky lightly as they all walk the length of the corridor.

" _And_ good going," Jason chirps pointedly at Rose, slinging an arm around her shoulders.

Rose smiles and blows another tiny bubble with her gum, looking pleased. Rocky gives her a fist bump, thanking her profusely and promising her multiple favours in exchange for saving his arse.

They all make their way up through the castle and walk into the Great Hall—a strange, brief kind of unity lingering between their two rival Houses for a moment at managing to survive a perilous situation together—before they split off and go to their tables at opposite ends of the hall.

Kim bids goodbye to Rose and the other Slytherin fourth-years (the ones who aren't total pricks, which is more than most people would expect) and she's walking with Jason and Zack towards the Gryffindor table when she has a thought. Puts a hand on each of their forearms, gently.

"Would you two mind going for a walk with me, actually?" she asks, vague.

They peer at her curiously, both nodding after a moment, and she turns to walk back the way they came, leading them out into the Entrance Hall. "Is outside okay? It won't be long, promise." Jason and Zack both nod again, both regarding her with a soft fondness in their eyes.

Kim pushes through the front doors, walking down the stone steps and out into the grounds, immediately angling towards the lake. The weather is certainly chilly, the grass under their feet firm, frozen as they tread the sloping lawn. No snow yet, though, and after a moment she turns, drawing her wand and tapping both of their robes as well as her own. Mutters, " _Impervius_ ," to provide a bit more insulation against the cold, given none of them are wearing their winter cloaks.

They walk for a couple minutes in silence until Kim slows her pace a little, falling into step with them before she speaks, "Can one of you explain what happened before class?" she asks, and her tone isn't accusatory. More curious, soft.

Jason and Zack kind of waffle for a moment, each glancing at the other only in their peripherals as the three of them begin to walk around the edge of the trees that surround the lake to the north. As if making eye contact will implicate them, somehow.

She takes pity on them and speaks again, "I don't mean it badly. It just..." she trails off, looking at Zack. "It surprised me. Thank you both, truly."

Zack nods slowly. "Jay explained the situation to me last weekend," he says, and Kim inclines her head. She asked Jason to, certainly, though she wasn't aware that he'd done it already.

With how Zack behaved in the dungeons earlier, she'd guessed as much.

At the confirmation, though, Kim watches him more carefully, looking for any kind of hesitation, any misgivings, any second-thoughts about talking with her now, being friendly with her, after learning what he had. But he hasn't been any different to her this week, now that she thinks about it—if anything, he's been even warmer, somehow.

"And?" she tries, still watching his face, stepping over a root that's snuck out from the treeline, protruding from the grass.

Zack looks right back at her, expression open, honest. "I was going to talk to you about it. Just waiting for the right time. But might as well now, so—" he takes a deep breath, "all I wanted to say was that you don't have to be worried."

She blinks, a warmth flooding through her at him voicing it directly.

"I'd heard a bit before about what happened, which really wasn't much," he continues, looking out at the grounds and furrowing his brow. "And Jay's been tight-lipped about the whole thing... I just figured you'd tell me—or one of you would—when you were ready."

He shrugs. "But yeah — got the full story, and I wanted to acknowledge that _yes_ , what you did was right awful. I've come to know you decently at this point, so I understand that not saying that outright would give you the impression that I was glossing over it, or being disingenuous. So there: it was a shitty thing, and I understand the gravity of it."

Kim nods, surprised at his insight. He understands her better than she thought he did.

Or, really, maybe he's just never indicated it this explicitly. Maybe he's been this observant the whole time.

"But we're cool, Kim," Zack says, voice sure. "Jay told me you thought I might peace out after learning about all of it? And I get where you're coming from—again, knowing you decently well—but you don't have to be worried about that, mate."

He pauses, meeting her eyes. "I acted like I did earlier because he warned me that there likely would be some— er, proximity risks of being around you. And you know I've seen the bloody noses, the spell damage and shit from our boy, here—" he jerks his head at Jason, "getting into it with those wankers. So when I saw those spells, and I don't mean this badly, so please hear me—I assumed in the moment that they were directed at you."

"As did I, obviously," Jason mutters, gesturing lazily with his hand.

Kim nods, having figured as much. "Understandable."

Zack nods too, turning his body a bit more towards her as the three of them walk. "So it's not that I think you're some damsel that needs protecting or saving. Far from it. I just... I saw a threat to you and I acted. You're my friend, and I'd take a hit for you any day."

Kim blinks, once again thrown by his candor. "I don't think I deserve that," she says quietly, sincerely. "But... thank you, Zack."

He shakes his head. "You _do_ deserve it. And I don't believe that any less after learning about what happened with you."

She smiles at him softly and he returns it. Jason looks between them, evidently pleased at the interaction, and puts a hand on both of their shoulders, rubbing a bit before letting go.

"Just..." Kim begins slowly, "don't tell Trini yet, okay? I know Jase already said that to you, but just to make sure. I want to tell her myself."

Zack nods easily. "Of course."

With that, the three of them curve around, walking back at a leisurely pace towards the castle.

Kim takes a deep breath in and lets it out. Somehow, despite the chilly air, finding her heart feeling warmer than it has in some time.

.

Not five minutes into Kim and Billy's free period the following Wednesday, Viktor Krum's low voice sounds from above her. "Is that offer to sit still open?" he asks, looking down at Kim with softer eyes than before.

He looks less apprehensive, Kim realises. The thought seems bizarre to her—a world-renowned Quidditch player feeling nervous about meeting new people.

It warms her to him a bit more though, and Kim smiles lightly and looks over to Billy again, who nods approvingly. "Of course," she answers, gesturing to the table in the same casual way she did when he sat with them last week.

And he does the same too, coming to sit right next to her again. "I realised I haff yet to introduce myself to either of you. I'm Viktor," he says, offering his hand to shake.

Kim does. "Kim. And this is Billy," she says easily, giving an upward nod in the direction of the head of the table. And the introduction on Krum's end was completely unnecessary, but the fact that he did it at all is kind of nice. Polite.

"I'd prefer not to shake your hand, if that's agreeable," Billy says brightly. "But I'm very pleased to meet you."

Krum looks a bit confused but nods kindly before turning to start taking his books out. "Do you both haff a vork period every veek at this time?" he asks, looking between them.

Kim nods. "Yeah."

"Do you think, perhaps, I could continue to come every veek?" he asks, then hastens to add, "I do not mean to be—" he stops abruptly. "Ah, vhat is this vord…"

He pauses for a moment before gesturing vaguely. "Ah. Intrusive."

Billy shakes his head lightly. "Honestly, it's not a problem. We meant it when we said you could sit with us whenever we're here."

Krum makes sure to look between Billy and Kim both to confirm this, then nods slowly. "Alright," he says. "It vas nice, last veek. I do not mind noise or people, but I haff to get vork done sometime."

Billy nods. "Curious, and I don't mean to be rude, so please don't take it that way—but why don't you just stay on the Durmstrang ship if you keep getting swarmed all of the time?"

Krum shrugs. "Hogvarts has a vast library. There are many books on the ship, yes, but not like this."

Kim tips her head to the side a little. "Makes sense. We see you in here a lot, so we wondered..." she says, trailing off and pausing. "Though, if you're looking for a completely silent table, you might want to stay away from Billy and I if you see us here with two blokes and a tiny, angry-looking girl—" Billy smiles, shaking his head, "'cause we tend to chatter a bit as a group."

Krum's mouth quirks in a half-smile. "I appreciate your varning."

Kim nods. "Just so you know. But you can join us either way."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title is 'evolve' by phoria. 
> 
> most of snape's main lines are word-for-word from my copy of GoF.
> 
> \---
> 
> hello! back this week with a kim-centred chapter. bit of a hermione cameo. again, cameos like that from the golden trio and the other mains in the books will be RARE (the teachers are an exception, obviously). but it's nice to see her, at least! and you'll note this is just a look from another angle at a scene from the book! I'll always point to this as one of the easiest examples of why snape is garbage, after his 'i see no difference' comment RE hermione. not today, apologists!
> 
> so yes! jason told zack what Happened with kim back in the spring. about the Amanda Incident, as I've dubbed it. I've purposefully not outlined it much because you're gonna FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED (through trini's eyes) very soon. 
> 
> as for krum coming around — with the amount of time the kids spend in the library, I figured they were bound to see him here and there. he's just trying to get some work done! (as well as casually buMP INTO ONE HERMIONE GRANGER, OF COURSE)
> 
> he's a small part of the many interactions that I'm sure all of the hogwarts kids had with the durmstrang and beauxbatons students, yaknow? like they're at the school the whole year! bound to become familiar — especially in slytherin and ravenclaws case, given the two visiting schools sit at those house tables, respectively.
> 
> now, important note on the way I write krum — I use how JKR frames his speech in terms of like, actual patterns as well as textual expression (ie. 'have' becoming 'haff' and 'we' becoming 've'). I know people have varying opinions on trying to write accents into text itself, and tbh I wouldn't normally (at least not that heavily), but in the story I will be using JKR's way of writing when it comes to those particular accents in effort to keep it as close to canon as possible. easy examples are krum and hagrid! and this will be the same for the kids from durmstrang and beauxbatons, when we encounter them.
> 
> you'll note already that I write speech patterns different depending on the kid:  
> \- gia is irish and uses irish slang/also has indicative speech. the other secondary characters have specific ways of speaking too, which we will note down the line, but hers is the most apparent at the moment.  
> \- kim speaks a _bit_ posh because of her parents, educational background, and the whole slytherin uppity influence. her mum also didn't learn english properly until her late teens/20s (I realise uganda's 'official' languages are english/swahili, but kim's mum grew up in a gujarati household in a ugandan wizarding community and did not go to muggle school. so her gujarati, luganda, and swahili are MUCH, much better than her english).  
> \- aka kim grew up hearing more deliberate english pronunciations, less contractions, and less slang from her mum. BUT! kim's speech has also been influenced by other kids, including jason and tommy, so it's much closer to what naomi scott speaks like, if you've heard her in interviews where she's comfortable.  
> \- tommy was without jason and kim at muggle school for a YEAR so she's picked up more east london slang from the other kids she was hanging around. note her use of 'was' ie 'we was' and 'innit' as either a contraction or a tag-on at the end of statements. that type of stuff. but her, kim, and jason have the most 'refined' speech patterns of the lot.  
> \- zack is heavier into that type of slang than tommy because he didn't just pick it up—that's how he talks. less posh because of his income level/where he grew up. trini is similar having grown up in south england but I will explain when I have more a/n SPACE!  
> \- jason has a noticeable shetland scots thrum in there because that's his family background. he can also SPEAK shetland (and youll learn soon that kim and tommy have picked some up too!) and will use some words or expressions in line with that. his general phrasing is refined like kim's but he's picked up bits of those same mentioned speech patterns from both tommy and zack in his time.  
> \- you'll notice the kids even swear different. kim, jason, billy (when he actually DOES curse, which is rarely), and tommy will use wizard-based swears (ie merlin etc) because they were raised in wizarding society. trini and zack will not, because they were more muggle influenced, though obviously there is a lot of crossover. trini and zack touched on this during the run before they had that phantom of the opera water fight, but yes.
> 
> \---
> 
> onward! I've put up the next one because it's short and I realise we are a bit behind our reg update schedule. I'm currently getting bombarded with end-of-term assignments and stuff, including essays/reports/tests out the wazoo, so yes. thank u 4 ur patience. please adjust your expectations to like... a bit more chill for this update, given my mind is mush. <3 thank u for reading!


	24. Is There A Ghost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/26B0n5dX4S6pEdFMkfdNZo). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The post owls come soaring into the Great Hall on Friday morning, their silhouettes set beautifully against the pale blue of the enchanted ceiling. Kim rubs at the side of her face as her _Daily Prophet_ delivery arrives, taking a little bronze Knut out of the designated pocket in the front of her rucksack and placing it in the owl's leather payment pouch with a soft, "Thank you."

She detaches the paper from the leather strap and places it next to her bowl of fruit salad. Satisfied, the owl gives her a little hoot then sets off, and across from her Jason yawns wildly before sticking his hand out and spinning the paper towards himself, flipping through it with purpose to the British and Irish Quidditch League section at the back. He blinks a couple times, trying to focus his tired eyes, and peers down at it, continuing to munch on his cornflakes absentmindedly.

As is typical, he forgets that he's in the process of eating as he reads, hand stilling periodically and hovering with forgotten purpose above the bowl, a bit of milk spilling off the spoon, escaping his mouth for the moment.

Kim smiles at him fondly and takes a bite out of her toast, humming happily at the way the chocolate-hazelnut spread has melted a little. "Anything good?"

He nods, not looking up at her, eyes flitting back and forth over the page. "Kestrels lost to the Catapults..."

"Really?" Kim says, surprised. "Well, brilliant."

Jason hums, removing one of the paper sections and handing it across the table to Billy, who's himself immersed in some autobiographical Potioneer book. "Better for our side going into the match tomorrow—"

He's interrupted by a magnificent, dark eagle owl landing between them on the table.

Immediately, Kim feels her face pale. She looks across the top of the bird at Jason, who has dropped his spoon into his bowl in shock, looking as alarmed as she feels.

Both of them stare at the owl, wide-eyed.

Because that's—

"Crane," Jason says quietly. There's a pause, then he carefully holds out his now spoon-free hand, stopping it to hover just next to the bird's head. Crane twists around to face him and hoots happily in greeting, bopping his head into Jason's palm with eyes closed. Evidently pleased to see him.

But Kim doesn't register much of the interaction—her eyes are locked on the letter Crane has fastened to his foot, which is stuck out at her expectantly. Focused specifically on her name written there, in a hand all too familiar.

Her father's writing, which she hasn't seen in almost two years.

Kim blinks a couple times and takes the letter off his leg with shaking hands. Inhales a deep breath in and lets it out, then holds her hand out to Crane as well. He mimics the greeting he gave Jason but hoots a few more times with notable enthusiasm, bopping his head into her hand a second time.

"Hi love," she coos, voice deathly quiet. Gives a sad smile. It's been a long time since she's seen him, too.

Because Crane certainly continued to bring her dad's letters well after she stopped opening them in second year, always happy to see her, never understanding the dread that filled her heart whenever she spotted him soaring her way.

But she always put on a smile when she saw him, his soft eyes tugging at her heartstrings despite it all. Because she grew up with him—helped raise him since he was a tiny fluffball, brought home hooting happily with her mum from work one day. A birthday gift for Kim's father a few years after the death of his previous owl, who Kim never met.

He was her dad's, though, first and foremost. Gone with him that Halloween night four years ago, along with everything else.

Kim reaches out and pets Crane's head, running her hand from just above his eyes down to his back. He preens, closes his eyes again, looking more like a cat than an owl. Relishing in the contact.

And there are tears in her eyes before she can stop them, welling up with the force of just how much she's missed him. Something she certainly knew, given she still will feel a pang of loss unpredictably at the sight of an owl; usually only on days when her mind is already in a bit of a darker place than usual, like an old wound she expects to flare up here and there.

But at _really_ seeing him, here and literally out of the blue, her heart starts to pick up speed, jumping from her chest into her throat, and she swallows heavily, trying to keep herself calm even as her tears start to escape her eyes.

They streak down her face and Crane blinks at her, tilting his head to one side before hopping closer to her on the table. She feels Ptero slither off of her neck and down into the pocket in her robes—precautionary, given they don't know each other; they've never met, and how _strange_ is that?

How peculiar is it that these two animals who mean the absolute world to her have never interacted?

Kim tilts forward, looking right into Crane's big orange eyes, trying to smile at him, stroking his back. And he kind of gives a little, anxious half-flap of his wings, hopping in place like he wants to get closer.

So she tips her head further, bowing it at how she's crying silently, now, then brings her free hand up to wipe at her eyes. And with only an inch of space between them, Crane draws himself up to his full height and puts their foreheads together gently.

Both of their eyes closed, he nuzzles his head into hers, the gesture so intimate that her face contorts, twists into something like a snarl with the pain she feels ripping through her.

She whimpers a little, a sound so small that nobody but the two of them hears it.

And he coos at her then, softly.

Kim grits her teeth, tastes tears on her lips, tries to pull herself together.

Remembers that she's sitting in the Great Hall, with the school breakfasting around her, all caught up in their own lives, own worlds, own stories.

The two of them are frozen like that until Kim nuzzles her forehead into his one more time then pulls back, taking a deep, shaky breath in and letting it out. And she smiles down at him, genuinely, wiping quickly at her eyes and meanwhile feeling how Ptero's moved to wrap around her chest, constricting. Trying to keep her from toppling over the edge.

At seeing her smile Crane hoots happily again, still quiet, still searching her eyes with his. And she holds her hand out again for him, which he bops, lingers a little longer than he normally would. A goodbye.

He spreads his wings then, taking off, rising up, up, towards the ceiling, circling once and letting out a final, content shriek in farewell—so loud that some people look up—before soaring back out into the chilly, bright blue morning.

Kim closes her eyes, focusing on her breathing, gripping the bench underneath her with stiff fingers, trying to anchor herself—

The wood is lacquered, incredibly smooth after countless generations of students gathering, eating, existing happily here;

And that's the smell of coffee most prominently in the air, with fresh rolls, bacon, something sweet like syrup not far behind;

A busy hall is what she hears: a thousand sounds spinning together into a kind of warm, comforting white noise;

Tastes... tears. And hazelnut. The lingering sweetness of strawberries.

Kim opens her eyes, sees Jason looking back at her. Finds Tommy sat there beside him like she Apparated out of nowhere. Both regarding her with the same affection, same pain, same love in their eyes.

"Hi," Kim whispers, in a soft exhale. Feeling like she's come up for air.

"Hi," they respond in unison.

She smiles sadly at them both then looks down at the envelope on the table, addressed in her dad's hand. Resolves, right then and there, that she won't let it put a damper on her reunion with Crane.

Kim picks it up, holding it like a Howler that could explode at any moment, and swoops down to her rucksack, where she stows it at the very bottom. She tips back upward to sit properly and Jason and Tommy are still looking at her, features now tinged with worry.

But she shakes her head. "It's okay, guys," she says, voice small.

And as if they discussed it beforehand—maybe they had, who knows—the two of them get up and walk around the table, a feat that doesn't take more than a few moments given they're near the end. Billy seems to have scooted over to make space, and Tommy and Jason sit down on either side of her, each taking one of her hands gently.

Jason kisses her temple and Tommy puts her head on her shoulder; Kim finding herself feeling alright, even if only for the moment.

.

A couple hours later Kim walks into the library feeling especially drowsy, having just sat through yet another History of Magic lecture. She rubs at the back of her neck a little, humming softly along to a song that's been stuck in her head all morning, and quite appropriate for the topic of the lesson earlier: ['Sunday Bloody Sunday'](https://open.spotify.com/track/6C4LXC9UFH1IKiHYOp0BiJ) by U2.

She wouldn't normally be in here for her free period, given that she shares it with only the Slytherin fourth-years and none of the other Houses, but Snape has them researching _more_ antidotes with the heavily implied promise to test them again before winter break. And doing work in her usual empty dungeon classroom is her go-to, sure, but she might need books for this, and speeding through it as efficiently as possible is the goal.

Not to mention she still has to finish up the last bit of one of Flitwick's readings, which was _technically_ supposed to be done for yesterday's class.

The place is relatively empty, so Kim sits down at the table that the five of them have made theirs over the past couple months, taking out her books and flipping the two open that she's using for her Potions research. She has that lesson after lunch; it's more pressing.

And though she's certainly had her antidote recipe prepared for weeks now—after they had made it a group effort—she wanted to make sure to be read up on every established antidote possible, just in case there's a proper test or something. They have a Hogsmeade trip tomorrow, after all; she's not planning on getting much done, and she doesn't want to leave all of her homework for Sunday.

Kim settles in and starts to read. In the forced quiet of the library, though, she finds her mind drifting to the letter at the bottom of her rucksack.

Admittedly, she's curious what it says. Because her mum received a letter from her dad two months ago, equally as surprising, that led to the two of them meeting up in person—to him informing her mum that his Dark Mark tattoo was becoming more apparent. That, by his reckoning, it could only mean one thing; a warning of something he sensed coming, some kind of darkness rising.

He told her mum out of a complicated kind of love that still lingered, out of a desire to see both her and Kim safe.

That's what he said, apparently.

And her mum urged Kim to say something if her dad wrote; the same thing she asked of Kim years ago, after she threw him out of the house. Kim didn't listen to her back then, too young, too angry—blaming her mum for something that wasn't her fault.

But she learned her lesson after that. While she could certainly read it herself—and her mum respects her agency enough to be okay with it, given it's addressed to her—she's not going to.

It's going straight to her mum, unopened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track: 'is there a ghost' by band of horses. shit was playing in my head during that kim/crane interaction and it BROKE me.
> 
> \---
> 
> hello again! 
> 
> gosh. gotta say, this kim/crane bit hurt to write. I don't know if any of you have experience with like, no longer seeing a dearly loved pet due to fractured relationship circumstances? but hoo boy. it hurts dudes! kim's lost a lot, and though some of that is definitely on her... some is certainly not. underneath everything she's just a kid still, right. things can be tough.
> 
> as you MMPR heads surely have noticed, the name 'crane' is a nod to kim's crane coin, after the pterodactyl one. you'll note this is how many of the pets are named, either after a zord or a coin in most cases. (ie trini's family owl being named griffin after her thunderzord). look out for the others in the future! 
> 
> but yes! CRANE IS A SWEET BOY AND I LOVE HIM!
> 
> as for kim's dad sending her mum a letter months ago — this has been mentioned/talked about before, in the same chapter we met tommy. and it's complicated! yaknow! so much of this story is rooted in exploring what it means to be good or bad, light or dark, etc. — kim's dad is a death eater but also wanted to warn his family that something very shady is going on. he hopes for their safety! but yeah, we'll learn more about him in time, of course.
> 
> anyway. I'm well aware these last two have no kim/trini interactions, so please dont hang me by my ankles in the dungeons. 
> 
> cause I have excellent news!!! next chapter AND THE ONE AFTER THAT are almost entirely made up of kim/trini stuff. and they're huge chapters. our kids have their hogsmeade trip and our girls get to have a proper lifechat alone! at long last! get ready for a whole lot of talking, folks. 
> 
> we also meet a certain person who's very important in kim's life, get TWO flashbacks, and learn more about all five of the kids' pasts in the process. kim and trini especially. 
> 
> hold onto your hats!!! time for some BONDING!
> 
> \---
> 
> thanks so much to all of you for reading!!! I hope you continue to enjoy this story, cause I really do love writing it. 
> 
> thank you for your comments!!! they're so lovely!!! and if I haven't gotten back to them as quickly lately it's cause I'm in uni crunch time (as a reminder) so I WILL get there! I LOVE TO YELL BACK AT YOU ALL! 
> 
> but yeah, note that I'm Tired. & the thought of there being typos in these a/n's or in the text itself absolutely _vexes_ me... but I must acknowledge that if there is any time it might happen, it's this time of year. I HAVE NO BETA OKAY!?!? SO LIKE! if you spot one or something and feel so inclined, you can send me a message or an ask over on [tumblr](https://numberfiveisalive.tumblr.com/). or you can call me out in a comment here if you desperately have the urge to? come at me bro I don't give a fuck? (but I have been/will be doing re-reads of course. so like... should be fine.)
> 
> you're also welcome generally to talk to me over on the tumblr dot com! but yes. I can't thank you guys enough for your readership, comments, and kudos. the enthusiasm especially for the story is just!!! amazing. I appreciate you all to the moon and back, and until next time. take care of yourselves! <3


	25. No Way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/2UhhSTIAKDa5lwWItkYvIE?si=rfrrmUuCRFiD3JSNFe0RQw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Late afternoon on Saturday finds Trini sitting in front of Dervish and Banges, notebook open and charcoal pencil in hand, idly sketching Hogsmeade's busy High Street as people of all kinds walk by. There's a trio of busker musicians parked a few shopfronts down the way, playing a wood flute, tambourine, and a small drum, providing a lively underlying melody to anchor the chorus of happy bustle. As Trini draws, a sweet smoke drifts over her from time to time, carried on the chilly November breeze; it beckons to the roasted hazelnut cart further down the ancient street, and she breathes the smell in deeply at every opportunity. 

It's already become darker in the fifteen minutes or so that she's been out here, the autumn sun easier to set as they move into the winter months, though the streetlamps haven't ignited yet. She's got enough daylight to draw, still, and is quite content to wait as the boys take their time perusing.

There are plenty of ways to occupy oneself in town, after all.

Exhibit A: Presently, Trini's levitating a couple feet or so above the bench that occupies the front of Dervish and Banges, nearly finished a small chunk of the _Fizzing Whizbee_ that she purchased from Honeydukes earlier.

As the last of the piece melts in her mouth she floats gently back down to the bench, savouring the lemon flavour of the sherbet as it fades from her tongue. 

"Trin!"

She looks up without thinking about it, a happy flutter of surprise in her chest at the familiar voice.

Kim's walking down the street with a middle-aged woman next to her, and Trini smiles at the sight of them. Because though Kim's mum has a darker skin tone, her raven hair a bit longer and coming down just past her collarbone, the resemblance is evident—mainly in how they carry themselves more than anything.

It's funny, the things kids can pick up from their parents.

Trini stows her sketchbook in her robes and gets to her feet, stepping away from the shop and out into the street towards them.

As they come together Kim's face lights up and Trini feels herself mirror the expression (though she tries not to _beam_ like a complete idiot), given they haven't seen each other all day.

"Trin," Kim says again, jerking her head to the side, "this is my mum. Mum, meet Trini."

Kim's mum smiles in the exact same way as her daughter and extends her hand. "It's very nice to meet you Trini. I have heard a lot about you."

"You have?" Trini blurts out quietly, shaking hands and quirking her eyebrow at Kim.

Kim's looking a bit bashfully back at her, and as Trini unclasps hands with Kim's mum she remembers her manners. "It's nice to meet you too, Healer. What brings you to Hogsmeade?"

"Please call me Maddy, Trini," she replies, smiling. "And I'm just here to impose my presence on my favourite child. I tend to miss her, you see."

Trini smiles back at her as Kim rolls her eyes. Without a doubt, Kim seems to have gotten her goofy sense of humour from her mum too.

Maddy's not looking at Kim but seems to sense the eyeroll. "I love you too, honey," she quips, turning and ruffling Kim's hair playfully, which elicits a whine from her in return.

_"MuuuuuUUUUMMMM!"_

It's ridiculous and adorable, and a warm fuzzy feeling spreads through Trini as she watches them interact.

Maddy kisses the side of Kim's head and takes a deep breath in. "I'm about to go back home actually, Trini," she says, exhaling contentedly. "We're on our way to the Three Broomsticks. Care to walk with us?"

The invitation surprises her a little, but Trini nods quickly. "Er... yeah, sure! Let me just—"

She takes a few steps to the right and hauls the heavy door of Dervish and Banges open. Sticking her head inside, she sees Billy beside a row of odd magical instruments that are whirring quietly. The other two boys must be lost elsewhere, deeper inside the shop.

"Billy?" she calls, not too loudly.

He looks around for a moment, confused, then finds her and waves.

She gives him a nod and gestures toward the street. "If I'm not out here when you guys're done, I'll be in the Three Broomsticks with Kim, okay?"

Billy nods. "Okay! See you soon, Trini."

"Thanks, B."

She strides back toward Kim and her mum and the three of them start walking down the street towards the pub together, with Kim in the middle.

"Mum's had a bit of a migraine the last few days. Doesn't feel up to Apparating," Kim explains, making a sympathetic face and patting her mum gingerly on top of the head like a toddler.

"Sorry to hear that, Maddy," Trini says sincerely, the loose gravel that litters the smooth cobblestone street crunching beneath her boots as she walks.

Maddy waves her hand around. "It's fine, I'm fine. It's just easier taking the Floo Network—there is less brainpower needed." She smiles at Trini warmly then takes Kim's hand, swinging their arms between them gently.

"So," Maddy says then, eyes bright. "Kim tells me you are quite the Quidditch player, among other things."

Trini scoffs lightly. "Well, with the IHC cancelled this year we've been playing pick-up games together for a few months now... the high praise is probably because of a familiarity bias—"

"Oh come on. You're excellent," Kim interjects, pulling a face. She turns her entire body to face her mum for emphasis, side-stepping along the street in a giddy little hop. "Mum, she's excellent. And she's only been playing properly since second year."

Maddy looks amused. "Yes. I remember, _beta_."

As Kim turns to walk normally again she shoots Trini a smug smile, as if she's just won an argument. Trini gives her an unimpressed look despite the faint blush she's sure is creeping up her neck, and Maddy's walking a step ahead, looking between them with her eyes twinkling.

Trini goes to tug at her beanie, promptly remembers she didn't wear it today, and tries to keep her cool by running her fingers through her hair. "Well... thanks, Kim. You're not so bad yourself."

Kim smiles goofily and tugs on Maddy's hand like a little kid. "Mum, look! One person who doesn't think I'm entirely awful."

To Trini's surprise, Maddy's face falls. Trini had assumed Kim was joking, but she seems to have hit a nerve.

Maddy's voice gets quiet but Trini's able to just barely make it out, "Kimberly Ann, you will not talk like that," she mutters, tone gentle but stern.

Kim smiles sadly and Trini frowns. Now isn't a good time to ask about it, though, so she'll have to make due with a mental note for later.

They continue chatting as they go, and soon walk through the doors of the Three Broomsticks. The pub is charming as always, full of life, and making their way to Madam Rosmerta's massive fireplace requires weaving through a hearty crowd of Hogwarts students and locals alike.

Maddy turns to Kim and hands her a small parcel then hugs her tightly, muttering something into her hair that Trini can't hear over the steady noise and bustle of the people around them. Kim smiles sadly and pulls back after a few seconds, only to be tugged in again by her mum, who peppers her face with kisses.

As they break apart properly, Maddy's wearing a warm smile. "Trini, you are welcome to come to the house anytime, just so you know. Kim has a tendency to think about a lot but only voice a fraction of it, so in lieu of the invitation I am sure she _wants_ to extend—but likely will not—I would like to formally invite you to ours whenever you would like."

"Thank you, Maddy," Trini says sincerely, a bit surprised. In the back of her mind, she wonders if Maddy's this warm with all of Kim's friends.

With one more look at Kim that conveys something Trini can't pinpoint, Maddy turns and takes a handful of Floo powder out of a little box on the fireplace mantle. She tosses it on the fire, which turns an emerald green. The flames are roaring high as she steps into them and states a London address, and in another second, she's gone.

Kim turns to Trini with a quick spin on the ball of her foot, smiling mischievously. Her tone is playful when she says, "So, how about we get that drink?"

 _Ah_.

Trini blinks. "Kim, you don't _actually_ have to buy me a drink—"

"Shut up," Kim mutters, her tone jokingly impatient, grabbing the sleeve of Trini's cloak gently and tugging her away from the fireplace.

To her own surprise, Trini allows herself to be pulled along and through the dimly-lit pub. They find a little booth in the corner and Kim gestures for Trini to sit down, then turns to walk towards the bar to get their drinks.

Trini's removing her scarf and shrugging her cloak off when Kim reappears at her shoulder. "Whoopsie. I don't know what you want," she says, grimacing.

As if Kimberly Hart just said 'whoopsie'. Trini doesn't think she's ever seen Kim this... light outside of Quidditch; it's an entirely different side of her.

She meets Kim's eyes and sighs at her stubbornness, then shakes her head. "A butterbeer'd be great, please. If you aren't going to let this go."

Kim flashes a smug smile. "Okay, be right back."

Trini turns her head back to look at their table and runs her hand over the smooth wood, attempting to anchor herself in the moment. The pub is warm and crowded, but not uncomfortably so, and she stretches a little before sinking down into the booth a little bit more, content.

As Kim returns with their drinks—two hot, foaming butterbeers—and sits across from her, there's a further sense of ease that passes over Trini. It's nice, sitting here. Effortless.

And as Trini watches, Kim brings two shot glasses out from within her robes, stares at them for a moment, then draws her wand out of her forearm holster and carefully pokes at them, muttering.

At once, a copy of each appears, with four now on the table. Seemingly very focused on looking casual, Kim carefully produces an ornate silver flask from within her robes as well, filling each of the four shot glasses generously before stowing it safely away once again.

Kim slides two shots over to Trini and holds one of her own up. "To budding friendships," she announces, her smile still goofy, but softer now.

Trini clinks their glasses together, and they both down a shot.

And she tries to evaluate the situation that she's about to put herself in. Alcohol is well and good, but admittedly, being inebriated around Kim isn't something she thinks herself ready for _quite_ yet. Trini's been teased over and over by her friends about the fact that her usual carefully controlled, borderline icy, deadpan demeanour tends to melt away when she drinks.

"What is this?" Trini asks, gesturing to the multiple drinks on the table between them. The alcohol's still burning the back of her throat slightly, but it's not an unpleasant feeling. "When you said 'a drink' I figured you meant... one drink."

Kim shrugs innocently. "Can't hurt," she returns, eyes alight with mischief. "The flask of firewhisky was a parting gift from my mother, who, incidentally, asked me to assure you that she is in _fact_ a responsible parent." The corner of her mouth quirks up a bit. "It's not like we have school tomorrow, anyway. But if you don't want yours, I'll be happy to take them off your hands."

Trini sweeps her pint and remaining shot toward herself protectively. "No. Mine."

Kim laughs, her eyes filled with mirth and the slightest hint of something Trini can't place. And she's certainly getting better at it, but Kim remains one of the most hard-to-read people she's ever met.

"You're such a nerd," Kim mutters, her smile bleeding into her voice. "That's something I came to realise a bit ago, but it's still fun to see in action."

Trini scoffs. "Excuse me, I don't think you should be talking, Miss 'Quest-to-beat-Granger-at-everything.'" She pauses. "I think Babbling even likes you more than me, which is heartbreaking."

"Heartbreaking eh?" Kim teases, still smirking at her.

Trini gives her a serious look. "I've been madly in love with her for ages. Then you just swoop in..." she gestures vaguely with one hand as she trails off, shaking her head and holding her remaining shot up to cheers Kim sadly.

Kim rolls her eyes but obliges, and they down the firewhisky together. She carefully places her empty shot glass back down on the table with a _clink_ , blowing a quick puff of air out at the taste, then raises her hands up at Trini in a motion of surrender. "I'll keep back from her, promise. Code of honour and all that — you liked her first."

Trini's stomach backflips.

Surely, Kim's choice of words there hadn't been suggesting...

Huh. She's not sure why, but she hadn't ever considered the possibility that Kim might fancy girls, too. Which is so... grossly heteronormative of her.

She mentally slaps herself on the wrist.

 _Yikes_.

But unless Kim says it outright, or talks about anything romance-related going on in her life, Trini isn't going to assume or pry. It's quite an innocent statement, anyway. She's reading too much into it.

Trini grimaces as the alcohol leaves a burning sensation in her throat again, holding up her empty shot glass and appraising it. "Hoo boy. That shit doesn't play around."

Kim shakes her head, and her voice catches a little, as if she's trying to stop herself from coughing at the lingering taste, "I think the first time I ever tried this stuff, I was like, eight. My dad was drinking it neat at home one night when we were all listening to a Quidditch match on the wireless. I insisted on trying it, and I remember wanting _so bad_ to be all... adult-like. I looked up to him so much."

She pauses then continues, chuckling a bit to herself, "But it was so _vile._ I took one sip and made a show of spluttering for the next five minutes. My dad—along with everyone else in the room—was crying from laughing."

Trini smiles softly. She hasn't heard Kim talk about her dad before; she'd gathered that he wasn't in the picture anymore, but that's about it. Kim opening up to anyone seems to be a fairly rare thing, especially about this.

"So you've acquired a taste for it since then, I assume?" Trini tries, smiling at Kim still. "Or do you still hate it with equal fervor?"

Kim bobs her head side to side, eyes twinkling. "I've definitely found it to be useful. Tasty, no. But it has a time and place, I guess."

"Like now?" Trini deadpans, her face screwed up in mock disbelief. "Here, in this tiny pub a brief walk away from our school?"

There's a pause before Kim tilts her head a little, and her eyes are different, deeper, when she hums and answers, "Here, with you."

And the way she says it sends Trini's very gay head spinning a little. She's never been affected by someone like this—crushes are one thing, but with Kim, it's like the entire world falls away every time they're together. It's jarring.

They've spent what feels like almost every day together since their first Quidditch pick-up game in September, but it's still only been _three months_. Somehow, her and Kim have clicked so well that it feels like they've known each other already for... lifetimes. Trini's never let anyone in this quickly before, and she doesn't know what to make of it.

"Ah," Trini starts, her wit thankfully running sharper than her stuttering heartbeat would seem to allow. "So this _is_ a ploy to learn all my secrets. I knew it. Kimberly Hart, smooth operator."

Kim looks slightly to the side and her eyes start flitting around the room; her mouth opens in a half smile and she runs her tongue along one side of her teeth, looking a tad bit flustered for a moment.

"Well, if we're going to _really_ drink, I'm getting the next round," Trini adds casually, slipping out of their booth and striding the short way over to the bar.

She orders more drinks and within a minute, she's walking back to their table with another butterbeer for each of them. With a smirk, she also produces her _own_ flask—a birthday gift from her father who, as a Hogwarts graduate, is no stranger to wanting something a little bit stronger on a Hogsmeade trip day—from within the bundle of robes beside her.

"You sly devil!" Kim exclaims, looking absolutely delighted. "Oh, my mum's gonna be _thrilled_ to hear about this development. You two are going to get along splendidly."

Trini smirks, grabbing two of their empty shot glasses and wiping them out with a couple napkins before pouring just as generously as Kim did. She pushes Kim's towards her then gestures to it, taking her own in her hand. "This is single malt whisky. Fun fact, the Abraxans that pull the Beauxbatons carriage _only_ drink this shit. Let's see if you like it."

Kim quirks her eyebrow as they meet each other's eyes and wordlessly down the shots. Trini's feeling a good buzz already—three shots and a beer isn't nothing, especially so quick, and she's not a regular drinker. Despite how rowdy Hufflepuff parties tend to get, they're mostly reserved for special occasions.

With that realisation, Trini self-imposes a cap on her alcohol consumption as she finishes off her first beer and starts on her second. That will be it for tonight.

She tries to gently encourage Kim's previous inclination to share some more personal parts of herself, taking a long pull of her new beer before she says, "Funny enough, my mum was a fan of whisky too—single malt, in fact. Same stuff we're drinking."

Kim looks at her with the same depth in her eyes as before, and she pauses for a few moments. "What happened to her, Trin?" she asks, her voice very soft. Both of her hands are wrapped around her own beer loosely, almost absentmindedly. Clearly focusing on Trini and nothing else.

Trini sighs. That wasn't really where she intended this conversation to go, but sharing personal details with people isn't a one-way thing, right? She wants to know Kim—that requires some openness on her part, as well.

_Okay. Here we go._

She takes a deep breath and exhales her answer, "She left when I was eight. My little brothers weren't even two."

Pausing for a moment, Trini considers the fact that she hasn't talked about her mum in years. Her tongue feels heavy with the words, as if it's become swollen, and her mouth goes dry in a split second.

Trini takes a sip of her beer and breathes out again, steeling herself. "Hasn't made any kind of contact since then. Her parents both died before I was born, and my dad tried to keep in touch with her sisters but... yeah. She didn't want to be found. I don't know where she is."

She makes an effort to keep her voice steady but decides against trying to joke through it. Because Kim obviously understands losing a parent to some degree—to what extent, Trini isn't sure. But the alcohol is telling her that there's no need for walls right now, and she goes along with it.

"I don't..." Trini continues, then closes her eyes. Stays like that for just a moment longer than normal. She clenches her jaw and looks at Kim, though her instincts are screaming at her to look _anywhere_ else. "The only way that I know she's even alive is because her younger sister—one of my aunts—still comes around every year on Christmas and visits with us. She sends us birthday gifts too. It's kind of an unspoken agreement that we don't talk about my mum, but I feel like my aunt would have mentioned it if something happened to her, you know?"

Kim nods, and her entire person is radiating sadness. She looks heartbroken, as if she can feel Trini's misery clutching at her own chest.

Trini continues, absentmindedly running the tip of her forefinger around her empty shot glass. "My dad's mum—my abuela—lived with us up until a couple years ago when she passed. It was her who really became like a mother figure to me, in a way? We were close. Super mobile and healthy for her age... always seemed younger." Trini smiles a little, genuinely, though the pain of it all pulls at her features strangely. "Used to come hiking with us, even."

She takes a sip of her beer in effort to seem more casual, though under the table, her other hand is gripping her thigh so hard that it's hurting. It's been years and here she is, trying _so_ hard not to cry.

Unable to look at Kim any longer, her gaze falls on a small knot of old-timer wizards in the front corner of the pub who are celebrating something. She finds herself relating very heavily to the bottle of champagne that one of them is shaking up, then—

 _Pop_.

Kim's still sitting there patiently waiting, not pushing, and Trini sighs. "When my dad was at Hogwarts my abuela would read his textbooks, all in effort to just _learn_ more about him and what he was. She didn't have magic—my dad's muggle-born, right—but she saw the beauty in all of it even though she didn't understand it. Because he was her son, and she loved every part of him—" her voice breaks, gaze still on the wizards in the corner, unfocused, "...and I swear, so much of me is _her_ , if that makes sense. I'm never going to be the person she was, but there are bits that I recognise. And on the days I hate myself, I try to remember that and be proud of it."

Trini takes a deep breath again and looks back in Kim's direction, smiling sadly.

"I'm so sorry, Trin," Kim whispers, watching her with such a profound look of empathy that it alone comforts Trini a little. And in the dim atmosphere of the pub with the crackling fireplace nearby, the light reflects more than usual off of Kim's teary eyes.

"You get used to it, I guess. The loss," Trini mutters, sipping at her beer again in effort to occupy her shaking hands. "I don't think time makes it any easier, but you get used to it."

Kim nods like she might just understand, blinking slowly and taking a sip of her beer as well.

Trini meets her eyes. "What happened with your dad, Kim?"

Letting out a heavy sigh, Kim hesitates for a moment. "Wasting no time, eh?" she breathes. Her voice is kind, resigned, not brash or accusatory. Running an index finger over her choker necklace, she shrugs lightly, perhaps attempting to rid her shoulders of the tension that's clearly built up there within the last few seconds.

"My mum and dad split up a year or so before I came to Hogwarts. He just..." she trails off, seemingly trying to find the words. "She realised he wasn't the person she thought he was. I didn't understand it for so long— I was so horrible to her about it."

Kim shakes her head, at once looking frustrated with herself, simmering underneath. "But I didn't know the extent of it, and I was naïve. He was still my hero regardless of what my mum said." She pauses, silence falling between them as she deliberates again.

"And... I heard things, I learned things about him that should have made me hate him right away. But I couldn't," she whispers, tipping her head back a little to keep her tears from falling. And Trini knows Kim enough by now to understand that sadness doesn't have anything to do with it—in this moment, at least, it's Kim physically exuding anger, shame.

Kim's jaw clenches, eyes fixed on the table. "I spent years after they split up trying to emulate him, and that bled into my life at school, obviously. I was wrapped up this idea of who I thought he was: influenced by his stories, his ideals, and his superiority complex." She sighs heavily. "My first two years here I was... mean, and I befriended people equally as awful. That's who I thought I was supposed to be—it was who I _wanted_ to be."

Trini nods slowly, encouraging her to continue, face pulling into a sad smile that is tight-lipped and unassuming. She's internally battling an overwhelming urge to reach out for Kim to comfort her, to anchor her against the storm of raw, consuming self-loathing blazing in her eyes. 

Kim's leg bounces under the table, wearing on the pub's creaky wooden floorboards.

But she's not looking at Trini—her gaze is distant, somewhere else as she continues quietly, "And I can't blame it entirely on my dad. I was horrible. But... I don't think I really understood how harmful it all was—the blood supremacy bullshit especially. I was so bigoted, so ignorant."

She shakes her head. "But then the Chamber of Secrets was opened, right. And suddenly those ideals, those views, all of it was actually put into practice. Muggle-born kids I _knew_ were being targeted. And, gods, that slapped me straight across the face."

Kim's eyes glaze over, unfocused as she plays with her hands on top of the table. "Because there were my friends, right, _laughing_ about it in our common room, even as people were coming inches from dying."

And Trini can't say any of this surprises her—she heard stories about a lot of the kids in Slytherin House and the comments they made in second year especially.

She's heard stories about Kim, too.

Trini's considered all of this before. But she decided that she wanted to _know_ Kim—that includes the bad with the good.

Kim continues, looking angry again as her voice picks up pace, "It's like... the fact that those ideals were truly, actually harmful never clicked with me. Like, _Merlin_." She runs a hand through her choppy hair roughly, clutching at it briefly like she's considering ripping it out. "I was riding the tube in London with my mum once, right. And some drunk idiot started making comments at her. Throwing racial slurs around. And I was furious because, like, how fucking _dare_ he? And what an absolute troll he was, to think he was above someone because of the colour of their skin?"

She rubs the sides of her face with her hands now, movements still too rough, and a dark chuckle escapes her. "But then there I was. Literally perpetuating the exact same hate and ignorance, just in a different form. And that's not so say any of it ever sat exactly right with me, but I went along with it. I participated. I _bullied_ people, and it took kids I knew nearly dying for the reality of it all to get through my thick skull apparently." She pauses, taking a deep breath. "And as second year ended I was disgusted with myself. So I confronted my dad about all of it, there was a lot of yelling on my end, and I haven't spoken to him since."

Trini blinks at the abruptness of Kim's delivery as silence falls between them. It all makes sense, but she's getting the feeling that she's missing something.

Kim looks around for a moment and seems to realise that she's been talking for some time. "I'm sorry, Trin. You didn't ask for my life story—"

Trini holds her hand up in a placating motion. "Kim, keep going if you want to. This is all context, so don't apologise. Budding friendship and all that, remember?"

Kim gives her a small smile, though she still looks insecure.

"So you blew up with your dad, and what happened afterward?" Trini prompts, her tone encouraging.

Kim looks tired now, nodding to herself. "Okay. I er—" she stops. Takes a deep breath.

"I spent the first half of our third year pulling away from my old friends," Kim says quietly, rubbing at the back of her neck. "Trying to find myself again, I guess. They weren't so keen on that, though, and things with all of them started to get bad—they kept saying it was like they didn't know me anymore, and it was easy to tell that I just... wasn't okay with any of it. Disagreeing with all of that rubbish immediately labels you as a blood-traitor, so that's what I became." She shrugs like it isn't a big deal, and Trini feels a sharp pang in her heart at the action.

Kim gestures vaguely with her hand. "Word spread in my House, and soon enough everyone knew. People started accosting me in the common room, between classes, at mealtimes…" she trails off, sighing heavily. "And months went by like that until a bit before this past Christmas. A group of guys tripped me up in the corridor—which wasn't unusual by that point, though it was mostly verbal or spells, not physical—"

She pauses for a moment, looking disbelieving. "But _Jason_ , who I'd thrown aside like he was nothing the minute we stepped into Hogwarts — he happened to be nearby and saw the whole thing. We hadn't spoken for over two _years_ by that point, but…"

.

**ONE YEAR AGO**

"What's that fucking stench, lads?" comes a cruel male voice, sounding from a ways in front of her.

Kim's on her way to lunch from Charms alone, walking quickly, spine straight but eyes on the floor; trying to mind her own business. There's a decent smattering of other students about, but it's not excessively crowded in this particular corridor.

And she _knows_ better — knows being in more populated places is safer, but she's only a floor up from the Great Hall; she assumed she would be home free from here.

Guess not.

" _Easy, Kim,_ " Ptero hisses quietly, moving from his place coiled around her forearm and making his way up her arm, hidden by the long sleeve of her robes. Within seconds, he's wrapped diagonally around her torso like a sash, constricting. 

And Kim tries to breathe deeper, chastising herself internally. She _should_ have properly checked to make sure it was busy before she stepped out of the shortcut she took; the route itself was a good decision—close proximity to some of the other Slytherin girls in her year (the ones who haven't been her biggest fans as of the past few months, at least) is a guaranteed bad situation waiting to happen, and she tries to avoid that wherever she can.

But she had been hungry, so she hurried along without doing her usual checks; hoping to snag something from the Great Hall before most of the school arrived. Take it down to a deserted spot in the dungeons to eat in peace.

Kim peers up to find the source of the voice, squaring her shoulders and readying herself to throw some vile comment back—

But it's a group of five of them, all upper-years: four guys and one girl, wearing matching sneers. And there are plenty of _good_ people in Slytherin House, but as the Former Ice Queen Turned Blood-Traitor, Kim's become the favourite target of what seems like _all_ of the really, really shit ones.

Her brain processes quickly, working against the adrenaline flooding her system. Because she could take a couple of them in a duel... maybe? One-on-one if she had the jump, perhaps. But fair is not how people like this tend to play.

And they're fifth-years, to boot.

 _Shit_.

Deciding quickly to keep walking and pretend she didn't hear the comment, she makes to move out of the way and pass by.

As she does, though, one guy abruptly swerves to collide with her deliberately and sticks his foot out to trip her. Kim manages to catch herself painfully on one knee, not faceplanting entirely, but she drops the book she was carrying with a _clap_. One of them kicks it away as he passes her.

"Blood-traitor bitch," another spits.

Tears spring up in Kim's eyes from both the pain in her knee and the humiliation, but she grits her teeth. Unwilling to show weakness.

_Get the book, keep walking._

Stopped ten yards behind her now, the group of Slytherins snigger as they watch her on the ground, apparently very amused.

But a low, _familiar_ voice sounds—

"Hey."

And Kim's head whips around in shock, forgetting about her book entirely and scrambling to her feet to face the group of Slytherins, bewildered, as the boy who tripped her sneers and turns casually away from her to confront the person standing directly behind him.

Without another word Jason Scott _decks_ him right there, in a practised right hook square to the jaw.

The offending fifth-year goes crashing to the floor and Jason advances on him menacingly, wand now in hand.

There's a charged moment where the entire sparse population of the corridor is frozen, watching.

"You ever touch her again," Jason says lowly, voice soft in a way that's unsettling, eyes flashing dangerously as he stares down at him, "and I'll fucking _maim_ you in a way no magic will fix."

And the other Slytherins have drawn their wands but don't retaliate, given a hearty group of _eleven_ Gryffindors stands a few feet away at Jason's back, clearly on their way to lunch. All watching in silence; faces set in solidarity, wands held ready at their sides to deter any more violence.

One of the Gryffindor boys gestures to the Slytherins, then, urging them to pass by and walk away. There are grumbles as one of them hauls their friend to his feet, a red welt already colouring his jaw. He wrenches himself away and stalks past with the rest, and Jason's Gryffindor friends turn to watch them go.

The spectators seem to take the clue and resume going about their day, and Kim kind of just stands there, staring at Jason with tears now running down her face. She hastily swipes at them, too proud to start sobbing in the middle of the fucking corridor.

He looks back at her, a terrible pain swirling in his eyes that she suspects has little to do with his bruised knuckles.

"Er," Jason starts quietly, deflating completely and bending down to grab her book off the floor with his left hand. "Here."

He steps into the empty space between them and Kim meets him in the middle, taking it and muttering a soft, "Thank you."

And she finds herself unable to say much else, though she's run through a thousand scenarios like this in her mind over the last two years; imagining all the things she would tell him if he were ever to speak to her again.

"I, er..." Jason trails off. "You let me know if they bother you again, okay?"

Kim grits her teeth and purses her lips, trying to compose herself. Only registering now that his voice is deeper than it used to be; still the same, still so clearly _Jason_ , but a far cry from what it had been when they were kids.

And of course it is. She's certainly heard it from a distance, but never this close. Never directed at her.

Kim swallows, nodding in a shallow kind of way, not meeting his eyes. And he seems to sense that she has no intention of doing what he's asked—tentatively, his head dips down to get closer to her, just barely.

Because he's taller than her too, now, isn't he? 

There's a beat of silence that lingers between them, and though the corridor is full of other students and voices passing by, it feels like they're the only ones around.

And then he breathes, "Kim, _please_."

It's so soft; pleading in a way that feels like a vice in how it clenches around her heart. She brings a shaking hand up to cover her own mouth as she stares at the floor, all at once marveling at how a name isn't always just a name. How it takes on something _different_ , depending on who says it.

She takes a deep breath in and out, then looks up at him. Meets his eyes.

Finally replies, "Okay."

Jason seems to accept this, blinking a couple times before giving her a curt, awkward nod and beginning to back up. His movements are almost stiff, as if he's forcing himself to walk away. "I've a need for some ice," he says quietly. "See you."

His eyes linger on hers for a moment before he turns away, with Kim whispering a soft, "Bye" in his wake.

.

As Kim recalls the memory, Trini finds her own love for Jason growing exponentially from moment to moment. Even after two years, even after Kim _ripped_ him apart, he still went to the mat for her.

Kim sighs, continuing, "I bumped into him in the library not a week later, during winter finals — was walking around by myself looking for a spot and he saw me and waved me over. I literally looked around like a moron. Figured he was waving to someone behind me." The corners of Kim's mouth pull up slightly at the memory. "But he asked me to sit with him and Billy. And he just started… _talking_ to me. Invited me to sit with him in the library, at mealtimes, in classes — he insisted on it."

Her voice shakes a bit and she swallows thickly, shaking her head. "Took me back into his life without question, just like that."

Trini smiles softly. She hasn't known Jason long, but he's one of the most fiercely loyal people she has ever met, next to Zack; so though what he did was incredibly kind, she can't say that she's all that surprised. Together with Kim and Tommy, he's like the third part of a whole that cannot exist in separate pieces. At least not for long.

And if Trini's being honest, she gets kind of jealous of him and Kim's bond sometimes.

"I talked with both him and Tommy that same night," Kim says, taking a deep breath in and out, "but she approached me properly afterward—I reckon her and Jason had been talking about everything that was going on—and we reconnected, too. She stepped up so much, and I didn't deserve _any_ of that from her."

She frowns as her voice becomes quieter, "Outside of them I was trying to keep to myself, but the bullying from other Slytherins was getting quite... I don't know. I couldn't hang around with any of my old group of friends. Some of them reached out—the ones who weren't being outright hostile, at least—and we did okay for a while. But it soon became apparent that it wasn't working."

Kim stops, swallowing thickly. "The people who I used to consider my _best_ friends were treating me like dirt; it was like I was on the other side of some invisible line. I felt so alone, and it was causing problems on the Quidditch team, too. But then..." she trails off, shaking her head, and there's suddenly some kind of panic starting to break through behind her eyes.

And Trini gets a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach all at once. Because Kim is afraid of voicing whatever she's about to say. That is evident.

She tries to meet Kim's eyes, but they're darting everywhere as she speaks again, her voice rushed but quiet, "You have to understand, being influenced by someone like my dad... and acting like I was for so long? It's like, if you pretend to be something long enough, that's what you become. None of that is an excuse, and I'm not blaming my dad for my terrible actions, but that kind of influence is so fucking _hard_ to shake..."

Kim's voice falters and she swipes underneath one of her eyes, catching a falling tear as her jaw flexes. Clearly trying to compose herself, she takes a deep, unsteady breath in. "And after what I'm about to say, I know you're going to think I'm disgusting, and like, you can say it. Or like, stop being my friend. It's not unfamiliar to me—"

Trini starts a little, shaking her head. "Hey, hey— no, okay?" she interjects, reaching across the table and taking Kim's hand gently, but insistently. "You are _not_ disgusting. And I'm not going to stop being your friend. Jesus. I need you to chill, alright? Slow down, I'm not gonna get up and leave—"

Kim chuckles darkly, meeting her eyes. "Oh, just wait. I haven't even said the worst of it—and I've been trying to work myself up to telling you for a while, now."

She leans back slightly, something uncanny and cold seemingly taking her over. Takes a deep steadying breath. "I know you must've been wondering," she lets out, gesturing to herself, "like, the haircut, the way Jason tenses when a group of Slytherins walk by us, or why I don't fight back when they go at me like that. That's not because of my sudden feeble attempt to try and _not_ be a horrible person. This isn't some kind of martyr bullshit."

Trini shakes her head again. "Kim, you don't have to keep going if you don't want—"

Kim's voice is firm, "No. Please, Trin... after everything I just said, you have to hear this too. Because right now it looks like I'm innocent in all of this, but there's something else that happened this past spring. And, like I said, you don't have to listen to me anymore after I tell you. But you've heard up until now, so you have to hear this too."

Acquiescing, Trini falls silent and lets go of Kim's hand, leaning back and looking at her expectantly.

Kim nods, as if steeling herself, and starts, "So. This happened this past March, just before Easter..."

.

**EIGHT MONTHS AGO**

"You're choosing them over us. Kim... please. The match is a month away — we're so close to the Cup."

It's well past midnight and they're sitting on the dark leather sofas in front of the Slytherin common room fireplace. Kim had been trying to finish her Transfiguration essay in peace, having waited until the place was empty. But Montague decided to sit down and pester her again about her decision not to play in the Inter-House Cup Championship.

"For the last time: you know why Adrian and I backed out," Kim mutters, running her fingers through her long hair and adjusting it over her shoulder. "After all the shit you've pulled, we're literally just asking you guys to not play dirty for _one_ game. One."

Montague stares into the fireplace as she talks, and when he responds, his voice is surprisingly soft, "And I told you it's not about that, K. Like, so what, we rough them up a bit. Why is that such a big deal to you suddenly? You've been so fucking different this year..." he trails off, shaking his head and seemingly at a loss, clearly genuinely upset. "I don't know what changed, but none of us like it. I know you already know that."

He pauses again, his face changing into something darker as he barks out a laugh, "And how can you _not_ want to bash those Weasley's heads in? Their family is a fucking disgrace!"

Kim pinches the bridge of her nose, swiftly packing up her books and rising to her feet. "I've said this to you before and I've said it to the rest of our friends: everyone changes. Why's it a bloody scandal when I start to re-evaluate what I've been taught?"

She pauses and her voice rises in volume, suddenly angry, "That blood supremacy rubbish never sat right with me anyway and you know that! It doesn't sit right with so many of us but we fucking go along with it! Aren't we supposed to be learning for ourselves? Isn't that why we're _in_ this fucking castle?! Do you want to be your dad's puppet for the rest of your life?"

Her heartbeat is thrumming in her ears as he stares at her with a stony expression, and she visibly deflates under his gaze.

After a few charged moments Kim takes a breath and finds her voice again, though it comes out sounding defeated, "I'm so tired of hating entire groups of people on principle. It's exhausting." He opens his mouth to speak, but she holds her hand up to stop him, deciding to try another approach. "Our definitions of disgrace are very different. And no matter who we're going up against, it's just shit sportsmanship for us to play like that, isn't it? Feels cheap to me — we can beat them without resorting to cheating. We're evenly matched teams."

Montague rises to his feet as well then, looking at her incredulously.

And as he shakes his head slowly, she feels something between them truly break. This isn't just about Quidditch, it's about them as people; after a very rocky year of trying to stay friends, they both at once seem to realise it's impossible.

"Never thought you'd be one to defend blood-traitors, K. Should I start lumping you in with them, then?" He pauses, staring right into her eyes, and his voice becomes almost gentle, "Though I suppose everyone has already, haven't they?"

There's a pause as he grits his teeth. "Amanda's told me a thousand times that you've turned into scum. I was just hoping it wasn't true."

Kim snarls. To her credit, Montague takes a small step backwards. "Just so we're clear, Amanda's father is a literal fucking Merman. And you're _dating_ her." His eyes widen, stunned at the new information as she barrels on, "If the both of you are going to call me a blood-traitor, go ahead. But _you_ , for one, should at the very least be as blatantly discriminatory with the rest of the people around you as you are with me."

She falls silent abruptly, feeling sick as soon as the words leave her mouth.

Guilt immediately begins crashing over her, bringing a lightheaded sensation and something like a chill that runs down her spine.

Kim storms away from him and rushes to her dormitory, quietly deposits her books on her desk, and climbs into bed, fully clothed. Brings her knees up to her chest and sits there, staring at her green silk curtains.

A few beds away, Amanda is fast asleep. Tomorrow she will find out that Kim, her former best friend of two years, had outed her without her permission. The wizarding world is a shitty place for people of half-human birth, and she had just exposed Amanda's _deepest_ secret to someone who would clearly be disgusted with her on principle.

All for what? Proving a point? Making herself feel better?

 _Merlin_.

Her and Amanda have been on unfriendly terms for almost a year now — ever since Kim decided that she was going to stop being a prat, plain and simple. Refusing to continue to act like a horrible person just because that was what everyone expected her to do, no longer going blindly along with a set of ideals that was based in hate and bigotry.

Their friendship was doomed as soon as Kim started down that path; the group of friends she made in her first two years at Hogwarts would never follow her.

She had hoped for different, of course. But it was like swimming against a riptide.

Ironic that now, nearly a year after the start of her little introspective journey, Kim had just done something unforgivable even by her old standards—she betrayed someone's trust on the deepest, most hurtful level possible.

Kim presses her palms into her eyes until she sees stars. Maybe it had been her mistake in thinking she could change at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'no way' by the naked and famous.
> 
> \---
> 
> HI! got a lot in this one, and two whole flashbacks! hope it wasn't too jarring, going in and out like that. but I wanted you to SEE.
> 
> so! we meet kim's mum! she tends to have quite the negative portrayal in most stories post the 2017 film, but in MMPR her and kim are close! they haven't always been on good terms in this story by any means—kim alludes to it a bit when she's explaining it all to trini, but we'll find out more soon.
> 
> kim and her mum have a little thing they do, where they spend part of the hogsmeade trip with tommy, then take a walk through the outskirts of the town and talk. kim and billy have talked before about how kim's mum insisted on coming to hogwarts every weekend this past spring, after everything with amanda happened. that has stopped now, replaced by kim writing her mum a letter every week, as you've seen. but maddy still comes on hogsmeade trip days! she's lovely!
> 
> as for the background on both kim and trini's parents, that's just scratching the surface. you'll note that kim didn't tell trini that her dad is a death eater... which makes sense, I think. you can't drop everything on the first lifechat!
> 
> they're drinking, though, and quite a bit, which allows for this type of courage and honesty on both of their parts. and it doesn't make what they say less genuine or tainted... it's just easier. trini addresses this internally a bit in the next chapter.
> 
> and they're using flasks cause of the UK drinking laws—beer etc is fine, but hard liquor isn't something they can legally order at a pub until they're older. so they have workarounds. to the americans in the audience: your 21 drinking age is BANANAS. but yeah, if you were confused, there you go. 
> 
> reminder: kim's buying trini a drink because she offered in the first pick up game they played!
> 
> hope that flashback with jason didn't hurt your heart too much (CAUSE IT HURT MINE!), but it's context for all of this, and a nod to just how _messed up_ him and kim were in terms of their relationship. and kim not wanting to tell him about being bothered by the slytherins isn't her being an asshole—she just didnt think she deserved the help. because in her mind, all of that shit is something she brought on herself.
> 
> but jason knows her, of course, and could see through it. even after all that time apart. and he gave her another chance! what a GOOD BOY! that will be explained further, as well as how kim and tommy made up, further down the line.
> 
> but yes! next chapter will be more of trini and kim talking. the boys will come to see them, and our kids will have a drink together. this is the proper beginning of real trust between kim and trini, and it's so lovely to see. I love them! they're good kids.
> 
> as for trini's mum, she really was That Parent. just... walked out one day. there is backstory, of course, and obviously trini has a lot of Feelings about that. if you were to think about her mum leaving in the context of her worry about getting to know new people etc... that's something. that shit leaves some deep scars, and those notes resonate.
> 
> but this is a place where kim and trini can find equal ground, in the idea of mourning for a parent that isn't exactly gone. it's a very complicated, convoluted type of thing to process, and a commonality that will help them both understand each other a bit better.
> 
> NOW! briefly — kim's whole amanda incident is something I wanted to include in this story because of what happened in the 2017 movie. I didn't want to brush that aside, despite this being an AU, because it is a HUGE part of her 2017 characterisation. I tried to think of something that would be equivalent in the harry potter universe... and that was tough. but what kim did to amanda here was basically outing her — if it helps you to think of it in the context of a gay thing, sure. but it's also different? this is a deep racial prejudice in the magical community, and people (especially some in slytherin house) finding out that she is a half-human is a Very Big problem. it can become dangerous in some situations. 
> 
> so what kim did was Very Bad. though I hope that hasn't completely obliterated her as a character in your minds, because she's working to be Better. she _will_ get there, and I think the movie did a great job of poking at the idea of redemption and regret on that kind of Serious scale, tbh. the whole 'you did a bad thing, that doesn't make you a bad person' bit is something that's incredibly interesting and IMPORTANT to explore! that grey area. again, that's a big theme in this story! the main theme, even! what it means to be good/bad etc. stay tuned for trini's opinion on the matter in the next chapter!
> 
> \---
> 
> but yes! thanks for your readership, friends. comments are appreciated but no pressure, as always. we will continue this next time! <3


	26. Hold My Hand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/4WnYuVFXe6Si4fZqkxbnvS?si=gebLIGi5TSeUUH67ylzZlA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

When Kim finishes recounting what happened, Trini just sits there for a moment.

So that was it. Kim had _outed_ someone, and brutally.

With her story told, now, Kim's looking at Trini with a hollow fear in her eyes that screams of resignation; she's clearly held off on talking about this because she sincerely believes Trini will bow out.

And... this is _bad_.

Between this and the way Kim purportedly used to act, Trini's sure that in any other scenario, learning this about someone she barely knew would be more than enough for her to walk away.

But that's the thing: Kim _isn't_ someone she barely knows, not really. This is Kimberly Hart, who Trini has spent nearly every single day with for almost three months. And, no, that isn't a considerable amount of time. But Trini knows her to be good; to be a person who is trying to be better. She is sweet and funny and considerate.

What she did was horrible. That's undeniable. But... Kim clearly _knows_ that.

Because Kim's sitting in front of her holding her chin up and trying to make it look like she's fine, but Trini can see her hands shaking. She's legitimately expecting to be cut off entirely here and now, and after the lead up to that whole confession, Trini knows that Kim thinks she deserves it.

"Kim..." Trini starts, stalling, trying to get her thoughts in order. She has to say this right. "I need to ask one thing. Have you apologised to her? Amanda?"

Kim nods, and her voice comes out in a trembling whisper, "Yes."

Trini nods back. "Okay. And knowing you, I assume you've done it over and over." She pauses as Kim nods again in affirmation, and after another moment she takes a deep breath, then speaks, "Listen, I can see how sorry you are. I see how much you regret all of it and how much you wish you could take it back. And, yeah, you've acted like a bigoted git towards a whole lot of people, and what happened with Amanda is really fucked up—"

Kim's breath hitches, just barely. Her face is an open book—she's preparing for the final word before Trini walks out for good.

"...but you need to move forward," Trini finishes, watching her closely.

Kim just stares at her for a moment. "Trin. It can't be erased..." she mutters, meeting Trini's eyes with a confused look.

Trini sighs. "I know that. But you're frozen in one spot with this, Kim. It's easy to see that it's fucking haunting you." She pauses again, holding Kim's gaze. "It _can't_ be erased, I know that. So you need to pick it up and take it with you. You have to stop dwelling on it. All of this—the pure-blood bullshit, how you treated people before, the fact that you _outed_ somebody—it's all going to be a part of you for the _rest of your life_."

She pauses. "You need to pick it up and take it with you," she repeats, trying to make Kim understand. Trini reaches across the table tentatively and takes Kim's hand again, gently. "Carry it. Live with it. You did an awful thing—that doesn't make you an awful person. You're working so hard to be yourself, to be good. You have to stop torturing yourself with this." She shakes her head lightly, her tone soft, imploring, "Just... god, Kim. Just be the person you want to be."

Kim blinks rapidly, then shakes her head. "Trini," she murmurs, as if she can't believe what she's hearing. She opens her mouth then closes it. "Trini—" she tries again. And from her tone, it seems like she wants to convince Trini that staying friends with her is the _wrong_ decision. "You don't— you don't even..." she trails off again as her voice breaks, now trying to pull her hand out of Trini's grasp.

And, ah. _That's_ where she's going with this.

"Know you?" Trini finishes for her, not letting go of Kim's hand. Instead, she gently—stubbornly—pulls it a bit closer across the table. "Maybe I don't, Kim," she says quietly. "But... we've spent time together. I like your rubbish jokes and I know that you think I'm _hilarious_."

Unbidden, a small smile pulls at one side of Trini's mouth. And she keeps watching Kim, who, by how her eyes are glazed over now, is somewhere far away.

Trini keeps her voice soft, "I haven't told anyone about my mum in a really fucking long time. And something tells me that you've given a very, very small number of people the talk you just gave me." She squeezes Kim's hand again. "So if we don't know each other, we're starting to."

Kim seems to surface a little at that, finally meeting her eyes with an expression Trini can't place. Trini holds her gaze as she continues, "Mistakes are a thing that happens—humans are fucking imperfect and volatile. And not every mistake is going to be something simple and fixable, or the start of some kind of storybook redemption arc." She pauses, forehead crinkling a little. "I don't think the world is black and white—I don't think good people only do good things and bad people only do bad things. I reckon shit is a lot more fucking complicated, and to think in that kind of false dichotomy is incredibly ill-informed. It's dangerous."

Trini's brow furrows deeper and she shakes her head. "I'm not saying that going around being horrible is okay, and I'm not advocating for the forgiveness of every single bad thing anyone does. Far from that. I'm saying that... each of us chooses every day how to live our lives, I guess. Every moment is an opportunity to go in a different direction."

She sighs, bringing her free hand up to her face and rubbing at her temple. Aware that she's rambling, but she has to get her point across. "I'd be lying if I said I was going to completely forget all of this, because I can't. I literally can't — not because I'm holding a grudge, or because I think I have to be wary around you now, but because everything you just told me is _part_ of you. It's part of your history and your story just as much as my mum leaving is part of mine."

Kim looks down at their linked hands on the table and takes a deep, settling breath.

After a few silent moments, Trini abruptly nods to herself and gently pulls her hand away. "Okay. Stay here."

She launches out of the booth, jogging to the bar and an immediately attentive Madam Rosmerta, who quickly provides her with her requested drinks. She's back to Kim in thirty seconds.

Trini slides back into her seat with a flourish, then looks up to see Kim staring at her with a mixture of confusion and what might be amusement.

"Last one, okay? And, if I may borrow your firewhisky, please—" Trini asks gently, as she waits for Kim.

Kim obliges, digging into her robes again and handing the flask under the table. When Trini takes it, their fingers brush together, and it's like an electric shock shoots up her arm.

_Jesus. Keep it together._

Trini takes a deep breath. "I've got us each a half pint of butterbeer, and the intent here is that the whisky goes into it, full stop," she explains, bringing two of their empty shot glasses over and pointing her wand at them. " _Scourgify_. _Tergeo_."

Once satisfied with the cleanliness of the shot glasses she pours Kim's firewhisky into each, then hands one over. With a playful quirk of her eyebrow, head slightly bowed, Kim looks expectantly up at Trini.

"I figured we'd do firewhisky again, as you seemed to think this was the perfect occasion for it," Trini says, offering a small smile as she tentatively pushes Kim's half-pint towards her. "My dad says the best way to settle something between two people is with this: _a half and a half,_ or a whisky shot dropped into a half pint of beer."

Kim just keeps staring at her, with something on her face that Trini still finds herself unable to discern. But she knows there's most definitely amusement present there, so she continues, "It symbolises two people meeting halfway, but we can just do it with water... you don't have to drink any of it if you don't want to." She pauses, taking a steadying breath. "But I wanted you to understand that our 'budding friendship' has not been compromised, okay? And I want you to know that you can tell me stuff like this and not be worried that I'm going to be disingenuous in how I respond, or resent you for it down the line."

Trini takes another breath, trying to make sure all of this is coming out right. "You deserve kindness, Kim, and you have to know that. For some reason I trust you enough to tell you about my family. And I know it didn't seem like a lot, but that's a _big_ deal for me. So in addition to thanking you for trusting me with everything you told me about, I wanted to thank you for listening. Your evil plan succeeded in getting me to spill my secrets."

Kim's still looking at her with the same expression, plus a depth in her eyes that is reminiscent of earlier in the night. She's silent for a few moments before she speaks up, voice low, "You are so not what I expected. Not that I even had anything in mind in particular. You're just..." she trails off, slowly averting her eyes to look around aimlessly, shaking her head lightly as if at a loss.

Trini doesn't know what to say to that, so she waits. From the look on Kim's face, though, Trini didn't completely miss the mark with what she said—she seems to have handled this whole thing okay.

Something she's come to realise is that she's not a natural at making people feel better; she never knows the perfect thing to say or do. But... when it's _important_ , when it's something heavy like this, it's like all the words she never says out loud come as easily and certainly as an ocean current. Like they were always there, running underneath, but never felt unless she's already way out of her depth. 

(Or perhaps, not out of her depth at all.)

She cares about Kim, and if Trini going on and on has placated her somehow, then maybe she's not as bad at this as she thought. Maybe just... unconventional. Maybe Kim just happens to speak whatever language she does; maybe they understand each other even _better_ in moments like this.

Trini's still silent and waiting for Kim to finish her thought, but Kim tilts her head and seems to think better of saying whatever she was getting at, because her face arranges into a more typical expression after a few moments.

"Thank you, Trin," she finally says. "And thanks for trusting me, too. I want you to feel like you can tell me anything, and I'm so glad you felt like you could share stuff about your family." Kim pauses, then smiles. "To meeting each other halfway." She raises her glass up and Trini smiles back and mimics her, both of them dropping their whisky shots into their beers at the same time with a _clink_ , then knocking all of it back together.

Kim scrunches up her face a little at the taste and she uses the last of her other beer as a chaser. Once she drains it, she smiles sincerely as Trini sips at her other beer as well.

They sit in comfortable silence for a few seconds, until Trini jerks her head toward the back of the pub and says, "I'm just going to run to the loo real quick. Be right back."

She smiles again at Kim and gets up, making her way past the bar to the bathrooms. As she pushes her way through the door, she finds herself a lot more tipsy than she had anticipated.

It's always harder to tell when you're sitting down.

_Damn it._

Once she's finished and washing her hands, she looks at herself in the mirror. She's bonding with Kim—that's good, isn't it?

And that tiny voice in the back of her mind that likes to tell her that she's not enough—that people will get bored of her and leave, and whatever else—it tends to get quieter when she drinks. She knows that's not necessarily something _good_ , because she needs to learn how to turn the volume down on it when she's sober, too. But it's nice to be free from it once and awhile without effort.

That freedom just allowed her to have a heart-to-heart with Kim, after all, and she's incredibly happy about it.

As Trini walks out and into the pub once more, she spots the back of three heads on the side of the booth opposite Kim.

Coming around to the middle of the table, she stands there and stares at the boys squished together on the little seat with her eyebrow raised. All three are looking at her with bright, innocent smiles on their faces.

"Hey, Crazy Girl," Zack greets, already nursing a beer.

"Lads," Trini deadpans, trying to suppress a smile. Deliberates for a second before sitting down next to Kim. "Are you lot aware you took my seat?"

They all nod at her and Billy slides another full beer across the table. Kim has a new one too.

"I told them but they never listen to me," Kim mutters, with fondness in her voice.

Trini turns her head in her direction, and Kim is looking at her with the warmest smile that Trini has ever seen her wear. It's incredibly open, and Trini returns it. 

And... wow, Kim smells good. Holy hell.

They sit beside each other in class all the time now, but something about being squished together in this tiny pub booth with alcohol in both of their systems has got Trini's head spinning with the proximity.

_Gay, Trini. That's gay._

"You two looked like you were having a serious conversation," Billy says with a soft smile. "We sat at a different booth and waited for a break to come over."

"Ah," Trini murmurs, tipping her head back a little.

"We were," Kim says simply.

Jason looks over at Kim with a question clearly in his eyes, and his eyebrows lift a little with whatever Kim communicates back. Their seemingly telepathic, known-each-other-since-birth connection that they've got going on is kind of spooky sometimes.

And he looks at Trini then, with something on his face that's a lot like gratitude. She understands immediately and wants to tell him that it's no big deal—that of course she wouldn't run for the hills when Kim told her all of that stuff. Even though her _first_ instinct is always to run. To avoid.

But there's no need to voice any of that. She's here, and she's staying.

She's _staying_.

And that feeling—of making a conscious decision to actually _remain_ —it's different. A tad bit terrifying, maybe, but also comforting.

"I'm so happy we all decided to play pick-up together," Zack mutters abruptly from the corner. His voice is so soft that Trini almost misses it, and her first thought is that there's something wrong. But when she looks at him, she sees nothing but a hazy happiness in his eyes. "I think you guys are good for me, you know?" he adds, and Trini's heart warms.

"Amen," she says, raising her beer to cheers with a grin. More to validate him than anything, though she shares the sentiment completely. It seems to work, and he smiles lightly at her.

Kim turns to her and smiles too, putting her hand on Trini's thigh and squeezing lightly before she raises her drink as well. "Hear, hear," she says. Her voice is playful, but her eyes are incredibly sincere.

They all cheers, and Trini goes to drink her beer—the one she told herself she wouldn't have—and almost spits it out on her second gulp.

Because, well—

_Kim's hand is on her thigh._

Still on her thigh, more like. She hasn't taken it off.

And a mess of things go speeding through Trini's mind at once:

  * She's gay
  * A lot of obscene Spanish phrases that express her feelings regarding the current situation
  * Her and Kim have only just started this friendship thing
  * She doesn't even know if Kim fancies girls
  * (Statistically speaking, she probably doesn't)
  * Kim's hand is warm
  * Trini's leg might be twitching



Amidst the noise Trini comes to the quick, oft-practised conclusion that she will just play it off casually. Even if Kim likes girls, the five of them have the beginnings of something really cool here, as far as friendships go. If she made a move on Kim, or misread something and made it awkward, that could be the end of _everything_.

So, no. It's a hand on a thigh, nothing to freak out about. Girls can be really tactile, right?

Trini tunes back into the conversation. Billy's talking about their visit to Dervish and Banges, "...honestly curious if they would let me do an apprenticeship there in the summer. But there's the matter of the Trace: I'm not sure if it's still okay to do magic in Hogsmeade when school isn't in session. And—"

"Where'd you go just now?" Kim whispers to her, voice concerned and barely audible. She's sidled over so that there's no space between them anymore, and her lips are so close to the shell of Trini's ear that she can practically _feel_ them there. She can certainly feel Kim's breath, to be sure, and it's causing goosebumps to erupt all over her body.

_Straight thoughts, straight thoughts._

"Just thinking. I'm alright, promise," Trini answers quietly, turning her head slightly towards Kim but not entirely. She can smell the firewhisky on her breath, with a hint of sweetness from the beer.

"Okay," Kim says. There's a tinge of disbelief in her voice, but she doesn't push.

Instead, she runs her thumb over Trini's thigh in (what Trini assumes is supposed to be) a comforting gesture. But all at once it's like every single nerve under Kim's hand is super sensitive and _freaking_ out, and Trini's _got_ to keep it together for the team.

_StrAIgHT tHOUghTS!_

Keeping her breathing even, Trini consciously makes sure her thigh is still relaxed. Fixes her posture and body language to be as open as possible.

Because Trini can play straight; she's been doing it all her life.

Kim mirrors her by visibly relaxing as well—she'd tensed up a bit when she thought there was something wrong on Trini's end.

And it's so fucking nice, here, in this tiny pub. There's an easy buzz of lively chatter and noise from the other patrons surrounding them; Trini can even hear the jovial laughter of the group of wizards from earlier behind her, still celebrating and seemingly without a care in the world. She's sitting next to a girl she is a big fan of, to say the least, and their boys are across from them. The entire atmosphere whispers _warmth_. Safety.

Billy yawns behind his hand, halfway through a discussion about muggle steam engines, and Jason sways and bops their shoulders together lightly.

"Ready to go?" Jason asks softly. "Was just thinking about turning in, myself."

Trini's sure that they all could stay here a little bit longer, but Jason's trying to make Billy feel like it's no big deal if they go up to the castle. And it isn't, not in the slightest.

"Same. Kim's been feeding me drinks all night—I'm ready for bed," Trini says, turning her head to the right and sending a blinding smile at Kim.

Kim scoffs, smirking back. "Oh, come on," she mutters, rolling her eyes.

Trini makes to get up just as Jason does, feeling considerably lighter on her feet than usual. "Speaking of drinks, who do I owe for the pint?" she asks, looking between the boys as Zack hands her cloak and scarf over the table.

Jason waves her off as the others get up around them, too. "It's my pleasure, Trin." He smiles at her and seems to consider for a moment. "In another life—if you swung my way—I would've bought you all the drinks in the world that you fancied anyway," he adds, slurring his words the tiniest bit.

She smiles wide back at him.

"But aye," he announces dramatically, "she has no interest in me that way, lads." He looks to Zack, Billy, and Kim sadly, and Zack is chuckling quietly as he pulls his leather gloves on.

"You're a beauty though, Trini. A very..." Jason hesitates, squinting. "Small. Beauty. And brains too! And Quidditch!" he exclaims, throwing his hands in the air wildly. He smiles and taps a finger to his temple twice, looking at her like they're sharing a secret.

"Okay, you think I'm brilliant. I get it," Trini mutters, blushing a little despite herself. He's such an idiot.

"I do," he says simply, shrugging into his cloak and winding his scarf around his neck. "And if any bird messes with you... you tell me her name and address, now. I'll send angry hate mail." He looks over at Kim thoughtfully. "And Kim'll give'r a punch. Right, K?"

Kim's watching him fondly, smiling as she puts on her cloak too. "Of _course_ I'll punch her," she replies, dead-serious tone contrasting stark with the twinkle in her eyes.

"You guys're idiots, wow," Trini deadpans. Internally, she's fairly sure her heart is overflowing.

Billy rubs Jason's upper arm in an affectionate gesture and then grips both of his shoulders from behind, smiling wide and saying, "Onward!" in a posh voice.

And Trini's heart warms even further, because Billy has told them all before that some of his idiosyncrasies—his words—tend to not be as insistent when he drinks. He described it as something akin to dimming a room full of bright lights, and he feels much more comfortable being tactile with other people as a result. Until this moment, she hadn't seen it in action.

Drinking affects everyone differently, and seeing Billy let loose a little bit is a treat. He deserves it.

Jason leads the way out of the pub then hangs back to put his arm around Kim. They start to talk in low voices and Trini speeds up a little to fall in step beside Billy and Zack.

"Get anything from Dervish and Banges, Z?" Trini asks, pulling her cloak around herself a little bit tighter as they start to walk towards the school.

"Nah," Zack says, voice slurring like Jason's as he tugs at the straps of his black rucksack. "Didn't want to squish your baby brothers' merchandise."

She knows he's kidding, but she makes a face at him. "I didn't know you weren't buying anything! Let me carry your bag—you shouldn't have to cart around my stuff," she says, extending her hand.

He waves her off. "Quit it, Crazy Girl. I'm happy to carry birthday presents. Makes me feel important." He smiles at her then shrugs. "I just didn't find anything I was nuts about today, is all. Mainly I like browsing in there. They've some right cool stuff, innit. Helps me jog my brain a bit."

Trini's brow furrows. "How so? Looking at how it's all made and shit?"

"Kind of," Zack says, a bit hesitant. He pauses for a moment and looks at Billy. "My grandparents on my mum's side are muggles, Billy, and my grandfather crafted things for his job. He taught me quite a lot, and I've been tinkering around with some of his old tools recently. Over the summer, mainly, trying to improve. A place like that," he thrusts his thumb behind him to indicate Dervish and Banges, starting to swerve a bit to the left unintentionally, "is so cool t' me, 'cause it's basically my grandad's old shop with magic thrown in the mix."

Zack sways and Trini casually links her arm with his in a preemptive attempt to keep him from falling over. It's unlikely to happen but she holds onto him anyway, which he seems to appreciate. 

Billy nods eagerly, then promptly moves to Zack's free side and links their arms as well. Zack looks pleasantly surprised.

"That's a very interesting angle to look at it from," Billy says, pulling his cloak around himself a bit tighter against the cold. "I'm not great with muggle mechanics yet, but Jason and his dad've taught me a bit about engines. They're fascinating."

They continue to make their way back to the castle, entering the chilly grounds and chatting away. And a few minutes later, in the distance to their left—towards the Forbidden Forest—Trini could swear she hears people shouting in the darkness.

Furrowing her brow a little, she looks between Zack and Billy. They don't seem to notice anything, though.

_Huh. Must be the wind._

What she certainly _does_ hear, however, is Jason starting to sing to Kim from a few yards behind them. "' _I said get up, and let me see you smile—_ '" he sings softly, and she hears Kim's gentle laugh spin around it like a medley.

Smiling, Trini recognises the song immediately: ['Hold My Hand'](https://open.spotify.com/track/4WnYuVFXe6Si4fZqkxbnvS) by Hootie & the Blowfish.

Jason continues, "' _We'll take a walk together, walk the road awhile,_ _'cause..._ '" he takes a deep breath and starts the refrain, getting louder, "' _I've got a hand for you._ '"

Kim's smooth voice joins in and echoes his on the callback, "' _I've got a hand for you_.'"

"' _Cause I wanna run with you_ ,'" Jason sings, a huge smile evident in his voice. Zack grips Trini's arm tighter, excitedly, and she knows what he's going to do before he does it _—_

Zack throws his head back and shout-sings the second callback, "' _Won't you let me run with you? YEAH_.'"

And all at once the whole group of them start singing the chorus together like they'd rehearsed it previous, Billy most definitely included, "' _HOLD MY HAND_.'"

"' _Want you to hold my hand_ ,'" Jason sings loudly, as he and Kim come up on either side of the three of them, Kim interlacing her fingers with Trini's as Jason does the same on the other side with Billy.

"' _HOLD MY HAND_ ,'" they all sing, clutching each other closer and _beaming_.

Jason puts his free hand on his chest, tapping out the beat and closing his eyes. "' _I'll take you to a place where you can be_.'"

"' _HOLD MY HAND._ '"

"' _Anything you wanna be, because—_ '" Jason sings, then physically stops in his tracks.

They all stop too, taking a deep breath before throwing their heads back to the cold starry sky and belting the last line out together, "' _I WANNA LOVE YOU THE BEST THAT... THE BEST THAT I CAN_.'"

The five of them dissolve into a fit of happy chuckles and whoops, leaning on each other as they resume their walk back to the castle. And they're all a little intoxicated, yes. But the feeling Trini is experiencing is more than that; they're drunk off the night, off elation, and off of each other.

"We should start a band," Kim says airily, still holding onto Trini as she tips forward a bit to peer down their little line at the boys. Trini turns her head to look at her and squeezes her arm, smiling like an idiot as their eyes meet.

They all stay wrapped up in each other for the rest of their walk back, and, god, it makes her feel invincible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'hold my hand' by hootie & the blowfish.
> 
> a few of the lines are taken directly from the 2017 movie, during kim's talk with jason in his bedroom (which is one of my favourite scenes in the whole film). they're not exact, but pretty close. one of kim's, then trini gets jason's lines: "it can't be erased" & "live with it." & "you did an awful thing—that doesn't make you an awful person." & "just be the person you want to be."  
> also, zack's "I think you guys are good for me." and kim's "we should start a band." references abounds this chapter dudes!
> 
> and those lyrics at the end that the kids are all singing are from the song linked, which also serves as the chapter title! jason's trying to lift kim's spirits a bit. as he does.
> 
> \---
> 
> so, hello! here's the back half of this whole amanda incident/trini's mum reveal. our kim is a flawed character! we know this! but we're on our way to being better. the road will be bumpy! but we're trying!
> 
> fun fact, that little bit about trini hearing shouting in the direction of the forbidden forest as theyre walking back to school after hogsmeade — she's hearing the dragon-keepers! trying to control the dragons! not sure if you remember, but harry goes to see hagrid this same night under the invisibility cloak. sees the dragons! the first task is the coming tuesday! good times.
> 
> so, so. I promise we arent gonna be this Sad forever. but like I said last week, this is the true beginning of a deep level of trust between kim and trini. big things happening here! and the first real like... time we _feel_ the magic between the five of these kids, truly. them just hanging out, talking, bursting into song on their way home! 
> 
> youll notice jason's scottish accent comes out a bit more when he's drunk. what a good kid! what else... hm. you americans might know the half and a half drink/depth charge as a boilermaker? fyi! but yes. I'm evermore scatterbrained this week! exams! so a short a/n I suppose? (gasp) 
> 
> UMMM. trini's brothers' bday is november 18! turning 8! she bought them gifts to send in the post! and you'll learn more about zack's family and things later, but there's a bit of a glimpse here. he's got one muggle-born parent (his mum) just like trini! that will be important a ways down the line.
> 
> \---
> 
> think that's it, folks. next week features a jealous!kim based on a bit of a... misunderstanding. though kim wont know that. it's a cute trimberly interaction in either case, and you will meet a few more of the kids on trini's quidditch team, too, which is dope.
> 
> AS ALWAYS thank you all for reading! I hope youre having a splendid start to your week. again, i'm in the end of semester crunch so keep that in mind! can't wait to be on holiday tbh. 
> 
> take care of yourselves, and until next time <3


	27. What's My Age Again?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/4LJhJ6DQS7NwE7UKtvcM52). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Sunday morning finds Trini sprawled out upside down on a beanbag in the Hufflepuff common room, groaning.

When she got back from Hogsmeade last night she stepped right into the middle of a raging party. It's one she knew about in advance, to be sure—the team organised it as a celebration for Cedric before the First Triwizard Task on Tuesday—but hanging out with Kim (and the boys) kind of got away from her in terms of time.

After shouts of greeting when she came through the entrance and plenty claps on the back from what seemed like the entirety of Hufflepuff House, they all insisted that she catch up, despite her protests that she _already_ drank quite a bit at The Three Broomsticks.

She initially refused, but Cedric was giving her puppy eyes. And it was her House and her _team_ —as much as she would never admit it out loud, she loves them.

So, a whole bunch of drinking games later—including flip cup, defending her chugging champion title, and some sadistic game Summer invented that involved an obstacle course, to name a few—Trini wakes up to find herself still in the common room with her team (and a whole mess of others) in a pile around her.

There also might be an invisible elephant sitting on her head. Damn hangovers.

Trini immediately registers that Cedric is using her stomach as a pillow, and as she cranes her neck a little she sees that he has the word 'CHAMP' written in bold letters across his forehead in some kind of ink. She smiles down at him fondly, grateful that her stomach doesn't seem to be churning at the current moment.

Gia, on the other hand, is looking a tad bit green as she stumbles out of the circular door to the girls dormitories.

Trini turns her head to the side to see her better, watching Gia's eyes—though a little glazed over—flit around the room with purpose.

"Listen," she mutters, upon seeing Trini smirking at her, "I dunno what happened."

"Sure," Trini quips, quirking her eyebrow.

Gia crosses the room and gingerly lowers herself onto the beanbag next to Trini, where she must have slept all night, too. She's careful not to jostle the tangle of people still sleeping around them, which strikes Trini as considerate.

"Babe," Gia whispers seriously. "I'm never drinking again."

"Who's gonna be Summer's pong partner then?" Trini says, jokingly aghast. "How're Ced and I gonna kick your arse if you aren't participating?"

Gia smacks her lightly on the arm, scoffing. Trini chuckles.

"Team Small and Tall versus the world," Cedric mumbles, face still mostly pressed into Trini's abdomen. He halfheartedly punches the air as he does so, which amounts to his arm hanging limply for a moment then falling back to the beanbag with a _thud_.

Gia laughs. "Pardon me, Champ? Didn't catch that."

Cedric cranes his neck backwards, blinking sleepily and pulling a face, presumably in response to the lights in the common room. "I _said_ ," he starts, flashing a pained smile at Gia. "Trin here and I are the dream pong team. We've got all the hoops covered, as it were. Unstoppable, unstoppable..." he mutters, plopping his head back onto Trini and closing his eyes.

Gia and Trini share a smile.

A low grunt emits from him then, which he turns into a little humming tune. "Lads, I reckon I'm still drunk," he declares after a moment, still not moving.

Trini looks down at him again. "You deserved the good time, big guy," she coos, running her hand through his hair lightly. He snuggles into her touch and she smiles.

What an idiot.

"You kids gonna keep chatting all morning, or do you wanna go get some greasy food with me?" Aisha Campbell, Trini's co-Beater, mumbles from somewhere a few feet away.

Trini carefully props herself up on one arm and looks around, her eyes eventually landing on Aisha's hair first, which precedes her head by nearly a foot. It's sticking out from underneath a giant blanket, which she's holding up and over her eyes, peeking out every few seconds and wincing each time she does.

"Tanya — girl, where you at?" Aisha says, sitting up slowly and glancing around at the pile of unconscious Hufflepuffs with a confused look. She starts rifling through the sea of blankets around her, muttering, then finally produces her wand. Waving it once, she conjures a pair of sunglasses and promptly jams them onto her own face.

"I'm here, _sasa_ ," Tanya Sloan murmurs drily, raising her hand straight up in the air with a grunt.

"Incoming," Aisha says, waving her wand again and sending another conjured pair of sunglasses soaring in Tanya's direction. They smack her in the head lightly, and Trini chuckles a bit.

Tanya grabs them and puts them on before glaring at Aisha. "Girl. If you fucked up my hair, you're dead meat."

"Hush," Aisha says, getting to her feet and teetering for a second. "Have more faith, eh? A little jostle won't hurt." She clicks her tongue and shakes her head, chiding.

Trini smiles. Aisha and Tanya bring their Kenyan accents out to exaggerated levels when they're around each other—playfully and purposefully, to be sure—and it's always entertaining to watch them interact.

"Smalls, I see you there grinning like an idiot. You coming?" Tanya says, staggering to her feet as well and looking pointedly at Trini.

Coffee sounds good right about now, so Trini nods. "Yeah," she answers, carefully extracting herself out from under Cedric. Her knees crack a little as she gets up, and once she's vertical proper she holds her hand out to Gia, who takes it gratefully.

Once Gia's on her feet too, she makes a face at Tanya. "I blame you for how shite I feel right now."

Tanya chuckles, smoothing out her t-shirt and waving her wand to bring her hoodie soaring over. "Honey, you're my protégé. Gotta make sure you can keep up, and that takes training on a whole mess of different levels," she says, throwing Gia a wink.

"I'm reserve, Tanya," Gia mutters. "Not even on the team yet—"

Trini flicks her on the ear for her tone.

"Ow!"

"You tell her, Smalls," Tanya says, nodding at Trini in approval then whipping off her sunglasses in order to look seriously at Gia. "You're just as much on the squad as any of us. If our fearless leader was conscious, he'd say the same thing," she insists, pointing with the sunglasses for emphasis.

"Absolutely," Aisha agrees, moving her own glasses down her nose to fix Gia with a look.

Gia pouts a little, though she noticeably brightens.

"Speaking of protégés..." Aisha mutters, smiling with her gaze fixed over Trini's shoulder.

She turns to see Roger Malone sauntering out of the boys dormitory in joggers and a faded Hufflepuff Quidditch crewneck, running a hand through damp wavy black hair. He stops, looking around at them all and waggling his eyebrows.

"Ladies..." he croons, "could I interest you in an escort to breakfast?"

Ever the joker, all right. That's Roger.

"We were just on our way up. How about we escort _you_?" Trini quips, laughter in her eyes.

Roger mimes clutching his chest. "That'd be a _dream_. Oh, I must tell mother—she'll be so thrilled."

"Yeah, yeah. Let's do this sometime in the next century, kids," Tanya mutters, her turn now to conjure three more pairs of sunglasses and hand them to Roger, Gia, and Trini. She shoves her own back on and turns to head for the door.

The five of them exit the common room and walk upstairs and into the Great Hall like that, sunglasses on and probably looking ridiculous. They get a few funny looks from some of the other students but make their way to the Hufflepuff table relatively quickly, where they all sit down on the same side with Trini in the middle—Ravenclaw at their backs—with a grunt.

There's so much food. Trini immediately starts shoveling a bit of everything on her plate, while the others do the same, Gia included.

As Trini stirs sugar into her cup of steaming coffee, Roger addresses a dark-haired girl sitting across from them. "Yo, did you ever find your other shoe?"

She looks up and shakes her head sadly, grimacing.

And Trini's gay, still kind of hazy brain notes that this girl is looking quite amazing for A) this early in the morning and B) apparently being drunk enough last night to lose her shoe. Her hair is damp, coming down around her face in loose waves, and, yeah, she seems to have put eyeliner on too. Which is more than Trini can be bothered to do most days, let alone today.

"No. Tried Summoning it this morning," the girl mutters, waving it off. "I'm a moron. Here's to hoping some white knight returns it to me."

"I'm sure Prince Charming'll be along," Roger says, pulling a silly face and puffing out his chest. Trini rolls her eyes, sipping on her coffee and scanning _Sunday Prophet_ headlines, hardly paying attention.

The girl chuckles softly. "Whoever they are, I hope I get it back. Those're my favourite trainers."

Despite her calculated disinterest, Trini's practised ear catches the neutral pronoun and she looks up curiously, only to find the girl staring right back at her with _very suggestive_ eyes. She feels her stomach bottom out.

_What the hell?_

After a split second the girl rearranges her face into an easy smile, as if nothing had happened. One of her friends taps her on the shoulder lightly; she turns her head to the side and nods before starting to gather her things.

She reaches across the table and gently brushes the top of Trini's newspaper with her fingers, meeting her eyes again. "Can I just grab the third page? Didn't finish."

Trini blinks rapidly, fighting to keep her voice casual. "Oh— my bad, is this yours?" she says, voice gruff but apologetic. Beginning to gather the whole thing up to hand it over.

"You can have it," the girl returns, shrugging one shoulder. "Get me back sometime." 

Trini holds her gaze, nods slowly. Gives the requested page over. With a small smile that borders on mischievous, the girl takes it, grabs her coffee mug and reading glasses, and begins following her friends out of the Great Hall.

And as she turns to leave proper, she _winks_ at Trini.

It's certainly noticed by her entire group of sunglasses-clad teammates, and Trini watches the mystery girl leave, perplexed. She feels Aisha's gaze boring into the side of her head, and Roger chuckles a bit from beside her.

Okay, what is she missing here?

"Er, what was that?" Trini asks them, looking around. "My chugging skills aren't _that_ impressive...?"

"Yo, be real," Aisha mutters, smirking around a mouthful of chocolate croissant. "Any pull is 'cause of your _Quidditch_ skills, you pint-sized prodigy..." Her tone is teasing, and she chuckles lightly before pausing abruptly at seeing the look on Trini's face. "Wait— you don't remember?"

Trini's stomach flips. "Remember? The hell're you on about?"

Tanya quickly shakes her head from Aisha's other side. "No girl, don't worry. Nothing bad—"

"Guess you were quite gone, eh? Me too," Roger says quietly, grimacing.

"It's _fine_ ," Tanya insists, reaching over to pat Trini's shoulder. "She was just... like, major flirting with you the entire back half of the night."

Trini's eyes flit between the four of them, turning her head to the right and to the left wildly. They don't seem to be lying, but she has no recollection of this. " _That_ girl? How the fuck can I not remember that?" she stammers, a bit alarmed.

Gia pushes her sunglasses down her nose and looks at Trini seriously. "Aye, you hold your liquor better than me, but you had _way_ more to drink," she says matter-of-factly, ripping a waffle apart with her fingers and popping the pieces into her mouth.

Trini continues to glance between the four of them quickly. "Okay... but nothing happened? Absolutely _nothing_? You guys swear?"

Roger shakes his head now, and his voice is uncharacteristically soft when he says, "No. You weren't having any of it, actually. Respectful in my opinion, given how she was, like, throwing herself at you..."

"That chick _bad_. Gotta admit, Smalls got game," Aisha says, smirking. "Ced and Wally were even trying to wingman. What lovely gents."

Trini tries to recall anything about the girl but draws a complete blank.

 _Yikes_.

"I— I don't remember her name..."

"It's Kelsey, T," Roger says gently. "Kelsey Winslow. She's a year above us."

Gia peers at Trini thoughtfully. "Yeah, she's a proper ride, pup. I dunno how you kept it in your pants, honestly. Whole room was taking bets on whether or not it'd happen."

Trini's eyes pop as she blushes, mortified.

Roger grimaces. "I reckon you impressed a lot of the blokes, at least, with your... resilience. Not like Kelsey was being aggressive or anything. But she was quite convincing."

Trini groans and drops her head into her hands, rubbing down her face dramatically. She thinks bits of it may be coming back to her now, but she doesn't really care to remember. "Well, good job drunk me," she mutters, after a few moments spent wallowing in self pity. "Girl troubles are the last thing I need right now."

Gia shrugs. "I respect you for having like, really high standards, babe. Letting loose once in awhile isn't a bad thing though."

Trini nods, her entire face flushed now in embarrassment. "Okay, _okay_ , noted. Thank you all for filling me in, really, but can we stop talking about my love life now, please?"

The four of them chuckle good-naturedly around her, starting to chat about a variety of topics in an instant.

They finish up the rest of their breakfast slowly, careful not to eat too fast—Gia especially. And as they move to get up from the table, Trini's feeling remarkably better.

She regards a pot of coffee and scoops it up, weighing it in her hand first to make sure it's decently full. "I think this will be well-received," she says, then grabs another. They'd normally just ask the house elves in the kitchens directly, but Trini and her pet hangover elephant can't deal with the noisiness of that place right now.

The others seem to be on the same page. Roger grabs two pots as well, while Aisha picks up a tray with a pile of rolls on it, conjures a paper bag, and unceremoniously tips the entire thing into it. For good measure, she takes one of the pots off Trini's hands, too.

Gia and Tanya swipe a few clean mugs, and they all start making their way to the doors.

As soon as they come into the Entrance Hall and go to turn right to get to the basement, Trini sees Kim striding towards the Great Hall from the door to the dungeons, alone.

Kim's seen her already and waves lightly, coming to stop just to the side of the doors where they're standing. Other students filter past them in and out of breakfast, and, at some of the expressions on their faces, Trini's once again reminded of how ridiculous the five of them must look—decked out in sunglasses, half-dressed, and clearly rough from the previous night. Clutching plundered coffee and a giant bag of rolls, no less.

"Hey," Kim says, eyeing Trini up and down curiously, face arranged in a look of pure amusement. "Got up to some trouble after you left us last night, I see."

"No thanks to these idiots," Trini huffs, gesturing to her four teammates grouped behind her.

Roger steps forward smoothly, all charm as he addresses Kim, "Guilty, I'm afraid. But if you'd ever like to get into some _trouble_ as well, you let me know—"

Trini stomps on his foot.

"Ow! Trini!"

"Don't talk to her like that," Trini snaps gruffly, ripping her sunglasses off and glaring daggers at him. She's not actually _angry_ , but her point still stands.

With Roger hopping on one foot—and Kim regarding Trini with a curious expression—Tanya takes her sunglasses off as well and pats Roger on the shoulder lazily. "Honey, you know she can fly circles around you. Don't even try," she chirps, as she looks at Kim with the tiniest hint of a smile pulling at her features. The two veteran Chasers regard each other with an air of respect that could only be borne out of playing against each other for the past four years, and the whole interaction warms Trini's heart a little.

She's about to bid Kim goodbye and gracefully pull her group back downstairs when a bit of a clamour echoes through the Entrance Hall: a knot of popular Hufflepuff boys in Cedric's year have emerged from the basement, looking a bit rough themselves but otherwise managing. 

As soon as they see Trini, though, their faces light up.

"Yo little T! Get it mate, get it," one of them says, dancing around and shadowboxing her lightly on the shoulder as he passes.

The next guy gives her an impressed upwards jerk of the head, grinning wide. "Bird's _well_ fit innit. Fantastic mental fortitude. Didn't know you had it in you."

Trini covers her face with her hand, flustered at the attention but, despite herself, feeling kind of bolstered all the same. Who knew _not_ hooking up with someone could get you so much praise?

"Excellent execution, bruv," chirps another, bowing to her a little as he walks by with the rest towards the Great Hall. "We all won a haul of Sickles last night."

Kim looks after them as they disappear, seemingly confused for a moment; it's a brief pause before her face changes as she seems to take a guess at what they were talking about. Her head tips backwards a little, and something flashes in her eyes that Trini doesn't recognise.

It's replaced a second later by a small, tight smile.

Kim starts backing up rather abruptly. "Well, glad you lot had fun. Trin, I'll see you soon, yeah?"

And Trini stands there, not even having time to be puzzled about Kim's behaviour before she's watching her turn around to start walking into the Great Hall.

"Kim— hey, wait!" Trini finally stutters out, lurching forward and jogging up to catch up with her a few feet inside the doors.

"Mmm?" Kim turns around leisurely, wearing a smile that's a little bit _too_... different, a bit too cold, though it's clearly trying not to be. This only confuses Trini further; though she doesn't want to get into it right at this moment, given the fact that they're standing in a now-bustling Great Hall. She makes a mental note to talk with Kim later.

"Do you want to hang out before Quidditch, maybe?" Trini finds herself saying, before she's even processed it.

Kim looks surprised, but she shakes her head. "I have... I'm—" she starts, gesturing vaguely.

Trini raises her eyebrow as she waits.

"...I've that Arithmancy chart to complete still," Kim finishes, though her words sound oddly empty.

Trini senses something else is up, so she decides to not push _too_ much. "Well, I have to finish that chart too. We can hang out in the library if you want? Do it together? It'll take half the time." She pauses for a moment, then adds, "Or if you'd prefer to work in your common room, no worries. I'll just see you later today."

And she knows for a fact that Kim never does _any_ homework in her common room, but she wants to give her an excuse to back out. 

Kim looks at her curiously again, as if she's searching her face for something. 

Then, to Trini's relief, she nods. "Okay. Meet in the library, or?"

Trini smiles softly, relief brushing a fuzzy warmth over her skin. "Yeah. Give me like... an hour? I have to shower and stuff, and we have to clean up a bit. The common room's a right mess."

Kim nods again. "Done. See you soon, then."

As Kim looks up, she sees something over Trini's shoulder that makes her smile a little—genuinely this time. Trini gives her a little wave, then turns on her heel to make her way back towards the doors.

And she immediately glares, because her four teammates are stood there, having not gone down to the basement at all. They look like something out of a cartoon: bodies all entirely obscured by the door with their heads poking into Great Hall, one on top of the other, as if to spy on Trini.

"For fuck's sake," Trini mutters, huffing out a bewildered sigh. The four of them scramble to look innocent, and Trini jumps a little to smack Roger on the head with her free hand as she walks past them towards the basement door.

"Hey! Why's it always me, man?" Roger whines, laughing.

Trini just smiles at him sweetly as she holds the door open, swinging the coffee pot in a slow pendulum motion as she waits for them to pass by.

As soon as she's closed the door and begun to descend the stairs after them, Gia's voice sounds from the front of the group, "So, er, you gonna tell us who that was, love?"

Trini furrows her brow, confused. "Gia, you've met her. Many times. You all know who she is."

Gia waves her hand around, mock impatient. "Yes yes yes. Kimberly Hart—"

" _Star_ Slytherin Chaser," Roger offers, fanning himself.

"And former mean girl royalty," Gia continues, talking like she's reporting a peculiar weather pattern on the evening news. "Has bad blood with like, half of her House? But more _importantly_ —" she pauses for effect, "someone you were just making googly eyes at." She says the last bit so quick that Trini almost misses it, too focused on the part about Kim and the bad blood with other Slytherins.

Trini fixes Gia with an unimpressed stare.

"So, I ask again, little chicken, who _is_ she?" Gia whispers, looking delighted.

"She's a friend, guys," Trini mutters.

Tanya looks over her shoulder at Trini with a mischievous smirk. "So Kimberly Hart has nothing to do with drunk you rejecting Kelsey's advances last night?"

Trini just stares back at her, surprised at the implication.

Tanya seems to accept this as an answer, chuckling as she nods. "Yeah, I see you baby," she says, tone smug and borderline sing-song.

Trini's brow furrows. There's no way. Her not wanting to snog a pretty girl doesn't automatically mean she's hung up on someone else.

Because, yeah, Kim's beautiful. And Trini's gay. But it doesn't go further than that—not actual, real _feelings_.

She's only known Kim a few months, anyway.

"Just not a fan of public indecency, I guess," Trini says evasively.

"You know we tease you 'cause we love you," Aisha chirps, taking out her wand to tap the barrels that hide the passage to the common room, then patting Trini on the shoulder warmly.

"Yeah, yeah," Trini mumbles, though she knows it's true. The teasing, as much as it's embarrassing, warms her heart.

.

"Puke break," Zack mumbles, holding up his hand briefly then taking a dive toward the pitch without further ado. He dismounts from his broom, is spectacularly sick in the icy grass, then pulls out his wand and spells it away in one full swoop.

"Mate, gross," Trini says, wrinkling her nose at him once he's flown back up to their level.

Zack wipes at his mouth with the neck of the tattered black robes he wears for pick-up games. "The human body is a fragile thing, my small, small friend."

Kim chuckles from a bit above them, her short hair blowing around lightly in the wind. "Maybe we end for today?"

"Does that mean you forfeit?" Jason calls gleefully, soaring into their little circle with their beat-up Quaffle tucked under his arm, which he promptly tosses to Kim.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, homeboy," Trini chirps back, smiling at him. "You lot wanna get lunch? I'm starving."

Zack looks at her thoughtfully and nods, and they all start descending slowly. "Reckon I should have another shot? Hair of the dog and all that?"

Billy comes floating in beside them, peering at Zack with a pensive expression. "You could do that, yes. The science suggests that a small amount can help. But you should also be drinking plenty of water to re-hydrate your body."

They all dismount and Trini hangs back as the boys start to walk towards the broom shed, watching Kim kneel to place the Quaffle into the beat-up wooden chest that contains the practice balls. For the sake of safety they'd forgone the use of Bludgers today, given everyone was feeling a touch on the sluggish side after the night previous. 

Standing up, Kim waves her wand to spell the chest to float along behind them. When she notices Trini waiting, she gives her a soft smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes.

"Everything okay?" Trini asks, leaning into Kim a little as they begin to follow the boys. The two of them had talked a bit in the library about their breakfast encounter—Kim assured Trini that everything was fine, explaining any 'off' behaviour away as tiredness.

Trini can't seem to shake the feeling that she isn't getting the whole story, though; she's not sure what it is beyond that it's _something._ Her main concern is that it's her fault somehow, but she doesn't want to go too far in poking Kim about it if she doesn't want to talk.

So when Kim doesn't reply after the briefest of moments, Trini quietly adds, "You'd tell me, right?"

Kim nods slowly. "Yeah Trin, don't worry about me," she answers, cheeks flushed slightly from the wind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'what's my age again?' by blink-182.
> 
> "sasa" loosely means like... 'sup' or 'yo' or 'hey' in swahili. it's a bit of kenyan slang. basically a real casual greeting.
> 
> \---
> 
> hello everyone! we're just about arrived at the 1ST TRIWIZARD TASK! how very exciting! real HP plot stuff is coming along!
> 
> we have a bit of a 'this is what happened while you were drunk' trope at the beginning, because like... trini and kim drank a LOT in hogsmeade. remember, they aren't Large People by any means! like, naomi scott BY HER OWN WORDS is 163cm (5'4") regardless of what google tells you! she ain't 167cm! she is SMALL! becky is just over 5 foot.
> 
> and note: the only reason trini thinks kim's 'half a foot' taller than her, as per the chapter where kim first sat down next to her in ancient runes, is because SHE'S NEVER SEEN KIM WITHOUT SHOES ON (standing up, at least)! around school kim is almost always wearing her doc martens, which add a solid 1.5 inches to her height (I legit measured mine to check), taking her to a rounded up 5'6". trini tends to wear chucks 90% of the time, which add virtually nothing. the only time youll find her with boots are a) quidditch b) in heavy rain c) in the snow.
> 
> I digress. that's all to say trini is Small and her being hazy as to how the night went is understandable. but yes! trini has Admirers! which should be no surprise, given she's a dope quidditch player and is therefore quite high up on her House popularity chain (though she has done absolutely zero to cultivate that). jocks, man!
> 
> but don't hate kelsey on principle, please! she just has good taste! and thanks to that whole debacle, kim is presently the 'i hope this doesnt awaken anything in me' meme. by her understanding, those guys were congratulating trini for HOOKING UP WITH SOME HOT GIRL! and trini didn't think to clarify! because _she_ knew what they were saying--they were impressed that she held out! that her gay ass was able to not hook up with a hot girl despite the Very Clear Offer!
> 
> but kim! doesnt know this. so she's currently having a bit of a time! picturing someone you may or may not be crushing on hooking up with someone else? not nice! we will see how this progresses as time goes on. but evidently, trini's googly eyes where kim is concerned arent going unnoticed by other people. can kim not see it? is kim assuming they are Eyes of Friendship? ONLY TIME WILL TELL!!!
> 
> remember, kim thinks she herself is like, the Worst Person Ever. so we have the person who Legit Hates Herself crushing on someone who she sees as the cranky deadpan embodiment of sunshine. also, like trini said last chapter! they've only just begun this friendship thing! COMPLICATIONS!
> 
> anyway. hope you liked the little glimpse into hufflepuff again. they're all good kids. meet the other members of the team! tanya and aisha (and kelsey, incidentally) are from PR canon. I mentioned their accents deliberately getting heavier because I didn't want to write it too heavily into the actual text. but they do it and it's delightful. roger is straight outta JKR's behind the scenes of HP canon stuff. he's one of what's referred to as the ['original forty'](https://www.wizardingworld.com/writing-by-jk-rowling/the-original-forty) aka the non-exhaustive list of students in harry's year JKR wrote out to have a grab bag of names to toss in the narrative. it's a rough list, and some of the names were changed! but a lot weren't. roger would likely be in hufflepuff house. so here he is!
> 
> sidenote: that ^ is what I always refer to when people try to say that like, harry, ron, dean, neville, and seamus are the only gryffindor boys in their year. or hermione, lavender, and parvati are the only girls. or the mentioned slytherins are the only ones etc. im like. bRO!? to QUOTE jkr, "while I imagined that there would be **considerably more than 40 students in each year at hogwarts** , I thought that it would be useful to know a proportion of harry’s classmates". MEANING that there are far more than 40 kids per year. because of course there are! hogwarts is HUGE.
> 
> ergo, HELLO TO TRINI AND KIM AND THE REST OF THE DUDES! they were there the WHOLE TIME BROS!
> 
> dont mind me. 
> 
> \---
> 
> THANKS FOR READING AS ALWAYS! blanket disclaimer once again for exam brain up in here. hope everyone's still enjoying this thing! I LOVE COMMENTS BUT NO PRESSURE!
> 
> up next, we have the first triwizard task! not too much detail with that because you already know how it went, but you get to see it from a different perspective I suppose. after that, we get a bit more kim/billy/krum interaction, and the next day kim notices trini's a little bit off. turns out seeing someone she loves go toe-to-toe with a dragon was a bit nerve-wracking! kim sees this and is soft with trini! caring! good SHIT!
> 
> hope you all are well. take care of yourselves, and until next time!


	28. Holding on to You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/3C3cr2JQwXIhqAHqOardVO?si=BsIyXJ62Q1GkGKDp86sEow). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"You're gonna be amazing, Ced. That dragon has nothing on you," Trini says insistently, holding Cedric's face in her hands, their noses almost touching. Black and yellow paint streaks cover one side of her face, and she's decked out entirely in Hufflepuff gear.

"Except for fire-breathing," Roger mutters, grimacing and starting to count off on his fingers, "and demon teeth. Er... and claws, and wings—"

Tanya elbows him gently in the stomach. "Not helping, mentee," she mutters, itching carefully at the bright yellow paint hand print on her face.

Trini puts her hand on Cedric's shoulder, and he remains hunched over to allow her to do so. "We'll be right there. See you as soon as everything's done."

Cedric stares into her eyes and nods, seemingly electing to keep quiet in favour of not being sick all over the place. Aisha and Tanya hug him, Dustin shoots him finger guns, and Cadwallader gives him a clap on the shoulder. A few of Cedric's other friends do the same, and he nods at them all again, then backs away from them and into the Champion's tent.

Trini stands there for a moment and takes a deep breath, meeting Gia's gaze, who's next to Roger with her arms crossed.

"Ready?" Aisha asks gently, putting her hand on Trini's elbow.

"Yeah, let's go sit."

They all walk around the tent to the entrance of the enclosure, making their way up the wooden stairs to the seats.

Once they're at the proper level, Trini takes another deep breath in and out, taking in the atmosphere. The entire school—along with the students from Durmstrang and Beauxbatons—is noisy and present; the excitement in the air is electric.

Trini spots Kim and the boys sitting amongst a mass of Hogwarts students, most in yellow with some red smattered about, and she leads her team to go sit with them.

She plops onto the bench beside Kim with a huff, shutting her eyes for a few moments then opening them again.

Kim pats her shoulder gently. "He's going to be great, Trin," she says softly. And somewhere in the back of her mind Trini's grateful for how gentle her tone is—Kim knows how freaked out she's been about this, ever since Cedric got the tip that the Champions would be facing _dragons_ as the first task.

Trini just nods as Zack's face appears in her peripherals, his hair done just like Roger's: standing up in spiky clumps with all of the yellow paint that's been applied to it, and he has a burgundy red stripe going down one side of his face.

"This's gonna be mental," he mutters, copying Kim and patting Trini's shoulder.

And it is. The task starts and Cedric goes first of the four, stepping out and immediately transfiguring a rock into a Labrador Retriever as a diversion.

"GOOD SHIT MATE! YOU GOT THIS!" Jason yells over the noise of the stadium, waving his yellow streamer through the air. Kim and Zack are cheering loudly, Billy's watching with wide eyes, and Trini's whole team is grasping at each other's hands tightly, gritting their teeth and muttering expletives under their breath.

There's a whole lot of cheering from the crowd as the dragon chases the dog, but just as Cedric's about to grab the egg, it decides it would prefer him as a snack instead.

"Oh fuck fuck _fuck_ ," Gia mutters, squeezing at Trini's hand a bit painfully.

But it turns out okay—he gets away with the egg in about fifteen minutes, the dragon giving him a bad burn down one side of his face as a parting gift.

Once he's done Trini's team lets out a collective breath.

They all watch Fleur Delacour and Victor Krum with a lot less anxiety, both who get through it as well, to varying degrees of success.

"That was some cool charmwork," Trini mutters, referencing the strange trance Fleur put on her dragon, and Billy nods vigorously.

And Kim—along with the rest of the stadium—seems very invested in Krum's turn as well, which Trini chalks up to collective worry over just _who_ will be the best Seeker in the world if he gets barbecued by a dragon.

It feels like no time before Harry Potter emerges out of the tent as the last Champion, to a wall of cheers and boos. Trini feels her heart pang a bit for him—admittedly, he's not exactly _supposed_ to be participating, but he's still out here risking his arse like the rest of them.

She notices the cheers make up the vast majority of the clamour, though, which is more than she expected considering how everyone's been to him as of late.

Trini smiles softly. There is unity in Hogwarts, after all.

He Summons his broom and hops on it, and Trini hears a tiny gasp escape Kim at the action. She looks over to her—Kim's jaw is hanging open in disbelief, eyes wide and clearly _delighted_.

"Merlin! Why didn't we think of that!" Cadwallader shouts over the boom of the crowd, and Trini smiles wider as she watches his progress.

"Smart, playing to his strengths," Kim says, then pauses. "I wonder if Quidditch has ever been played with dragons involved?" she voices curiously, not taking her eyes off of him, and in a tone which suggests that she would _very_ much like to play in a match like that.

Trini scoffs. "Chasers and your adrenaline rushes. You're mental," she mutters, to a noise of offense from Tanya behind her, who reaches over and ruffles her hair.

Potter gets the golden egg and the Hogwarts section erupts in thunderous cheers that vibrate right through Trini's bones.

And they look around at it all, smiling at the scene; him choosing to fly aside, the whole event promotes the same feeling as watching a particularly exciting Quidditch match, and they're all reveling in it.

Aisha gets up and takes a deep breath. "Okay, that took ten years off my life," she huffs over the noise, and the rest of them nod their agreement.

Trini smiles, though. Cedric did it— _both_ of their Champions did. She's incredibly proud.

.

The following day Kim and Billy are sat in their regular spot in the library, working away, when Viktor Krum comes into the small reading room and plops into what has become his usual chair.

This time he didn't ask beforehand, which is an improvement in Kim's eyes.

"Hello, Kim and Billy. I am here for scheduled study time," he says lightly, pulling out his books and arranging two in front of him, followed by a large, leather bound notebook. And he tends to give off a bit of a sullen vibe most of the time, but today—by his standard, at least—he's positively chipper.

Kim expects that's from tying for first place in the First Task yesterday, but who knows. He could just be having a _really_ good day.

"Alright Viktor," Billy returns, pausing from his reading to give him a little wave.

"How're you?" Kim tries, her heart beating at slightly less of a breakneck pace than it was the first time he sat down with them.

"I am good, I am good!" Krum answers, nodding his head a couple times like he's headbanging at a rock concert. "How are you both? Did you haff time to vatch First Task?"

Kim smiles. "We did. Though honestly, I wouldn't have expected you to be here today. Shouldn't you like... take a day off after almost being roasted by a dragon?"

He actually _smiles_ back at her—it's a little lopsided, but charming all the same. "Most days I only am in Hogvarts until midday, then I return for supper. Sometimes I vill be here until late evening, but yes, I vill not be doing that for the rest of this veek," he says, nodding as if to acquiesce her point. "I haff not slept as vell in last months as I did last night."

"I bet," Billy says. "It must be nice to be done with the first one. Now you can look forward to the winter holiday!"

Krum nods in agreement. "I haff decided to do my schoolvork only for some veeks. Then I vill begin preparing for next Task." He pauses, absentmindedly looking around the library a little. "It is a vonderful castle, this—much larger than Durmstrang."

Kim can tell that Billy is _aching_ to ask more about Durmstrang, but he holds himself back, looking intensely conflicted before abruptly pulling his massive book up to stand in front of his face and effectively hiding behind it.

Krum looks a bit confused again, but seems to think it harmless. "Your friend is funny," he says quietly, just loud enough for only her to hear. There's a slight amusement in his tone.

But Kim, ever the type to jump first and ask questions later, bristles a little. "He's one of the greatest people I know," she says, voice matching Krum's in volume. She manages to keep the fight out of her voice with some effort, because, really, there's no need to jump down this guy's throat unnecessarily.

"Oh, yes. I do not mean this in a bad vay," Krum says sincerely, meeting her eyes. "Billy is kind. I do not know vord in English, but he is, er..." He pauses, crinkling his forehead a little and snapping his fingers lightly, as if he's trying to get his brain to jog faster to the beat. "Snitch in crate of Quaffles?" he tries, looking at her as if at a loss.

And Kim smiles, because she thinks she understands perfectly. "Unique?"

Krum grunts. "Yes. This. I mean your friend vell."

"I understand. And I love the Quidditch analogy, that was perfect."

"I haff to live up to my name, do I not?" he jokes, opening up one of his books then taking an inkwell out of his bag. "And today more, after Task. I did not fly vhen one of your Champions did." He pauses, shrugging again. "I am surprised at how vell he flies."

Kim chuckles. "He's been playing Seeker on his House team since his first year here." She pauses, finding herself surprised that she doesn't feel juvenile about talking to a _famous Quidditch player_ about the IHC. "We hold a school tournament every year," she adds.

And he must see something in her eyes as soon as she starts talking about Quidditch, because he gives her a knowing smile. "Do you play?"

Kim feels her ears go a bit red. Thankfully they're hidden by her hair. "Yeah. Chaser."

He nods, still smiling. "I vould haff guessed."

She leans back a little, feigning offense. "Is that supposed to mean something?" she asks, voice teasing.

Krum shrugs. She's beginning to think it's his favourite way to express himself. "First day I met you both, I _did_ see you vith those girls," he explains, and Kim's eyebrows shoot up. "I do not know a Chaser that is not..." he trails off, trying to find a word again.

"Stupid?" Kim tries, grinning. "Hot-headed? Reckless? Pompous?"

He smiles, shaking his head and pausing for a moment. "Brazen."

Kim tilts her head. "I didn't realise you could tell so much about a person by which Quidditch position they play," she chirps, smirking. She's kind of interested though, given she hasn't given this a whole lot of thought before. She holds Krum's gaze and turns her head to the left slightly. "B, do you think that's true?"

There's a few moments where Billy finishes up whatever line he's reading, then pops up from behind the book, laying it down. "Sorry, Kim? What is true?"

"That most Chasers are brazen in nature, and that you can guess what Quidditch position someone plays by their personality, or the things they do."

Billy hums, considering. "I could see a possibility for some correlations, yes. Though I don't think there have been any studies to support that. It would be an interesting thing to try and measure!"

Kim turns back to Krum with mirth in her eyes. "I'm messing with you, Viktor. I can see that too. Like, one of our friends—" she nods at Billy, "is a Beater, and a _really_ good one. Outside of Quidditch she has a knack for seeing the whole picture, you know?"

Krum nods knowingly. "As Beater— vell," he stops for a moment, then smirks. "As _good_ Beater must. Just as Chaser must see angles to be effective in moment."

"But not change the game's trajectory as a bigger picture thing. A Beater can do that," Kim says wisely, and Krum nods his agreement before taking a deep breath.

"If I may say this—I can speak for a long time," he says simply, looking between the two of them. "But this is your quiet vork period. I am not stopping because I must, but I see you haff many books vith you—" he gestures between the admittedly large piles in front of both Kim and Billy, "and do not vant to keep you."

Billy smiles sincerely and promptly stands his book up again, disappearing behind it.

Krum smiles at him softly, then turns to Kim. "I vould like to talk, but ve can do so another time."

Kim nods once, knowing full well that she desperately needs to get some of her homework done. "I _do_ want to continue this conversation," she says seriously, with an undercurrent of playfulness in her voice.

"As vould I. For now, I vill leave you to your vork, Kim."

.

A couple hours later the five of them all leave lunch together, with Kim and Trini saying goodbye to the boys to make their way to Ancient Runes.

Zack looks back at them as he walks behind Billy and Jason in the direction of the library and blows a kiss. Trini swats it away, and Kim mimes catching it before it hits the ground. She raises her fist up as if to cheers him, and he laughs before waving lazily and following the other two off to their shared free period.

"You shouldn't humour him," Trini deadpans, though Kim can hear the smile in her voice.

"Zack and I're two sides of the same coin. It's expected," Kim says, shrugging.

Trini furrows her brow, tipping her head as if puzzled. "You think so?"

"Mmm. We're both social sevens, remember? Space cadets."

"True," Trini deadpans. "Have to keep tethered to each other or both of you will float off into the vast, crushing expanse of the universe."

Kim laughs, shaking her head. "Exactly."

They walk into the Ancient Runes classroom with only a couple minutes to spare until the start of the lesson, Trini leading the way up the aisle to the very front, where she turns right and moves a few seats into the row before sitting down with a huff.

Kim plops down beside her, taking her copy of _Spellman's Syllabary_ out of her bag along with her writing supplies. Trini tips her head back a little and takes a deep breath in and out, and Kim's gaze lingers on her for a few moments, trying to gauge. She's been subdued since yesterday—more than usual.

"You okay?" Kim asks quietly.

Trini looks over and nods, giving her a soft smile. Kim can see something else there, though, and she weighs whether or not she wants to push it. She suspects Trini's worrying over Cedric, though she's not sure.

Their talk in Hogsmeade has made things feel... different between them—more open and honest, less guarded—but she knows that Trini responds best to small steps.

Kim hesitates for a few moments. Then, in a voice that's still gentle, says, "I won't pry. But I'm here."

There's a pause before Trini turns her head. Searches Kim's eyes, not saying anything for what feels like half a minute.

"I appreciate you, you know that?" she finally breathes, tone sincere but halting, almost; like part of her has _just_ learned this information and is unsure if sharing it is appropriate. And the statement itself is not a common thing to say, phrasing-wise, at least not in Kim's experience. Something about it, and delivered in that specific way, sends a sensation like the touch of a feather brushing down her spine.

And... it's not necessarily in an attraction way, either? The feeling is something like surprise mixed with what might be a sense of humility.

_Huh._

All at once, Kim realises she feels _lucky_. Because Trini is beginning to trust her, even timidly.

And for a moment, she allows herself to be proud of it; satisfied that she's slowly uncovering that person she used to be—someone who is deserving of Trini's confidence.

Something about Trini makes Kim want to be better, and that's the beginning of everything, isn't it?

"I appreciate you too," Kim answers, trying to wear her sincerity on her face. Trini smiles at her and moves to take a quill out of her bag just as Professor Babbling comes soaring into the classroom, prompting them to look away from each other for the moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'holding on to you' by twenty one pilots. the bridge is one of my favourite things.
> 
> friendly poke to listen to the title songs if that's your thing! music is integral to this story, so if you can incorporate it a bit, GREAT.
> 
> \---
> 
> SO! hello! bit of a short one. we have the beginning of trini's Anxiety RE cedric. I tried to get into her mind when it comes to seeing one of her favourite people in the universe competing in tasks that are legitimately dangerous? remember, people have died! it's not super common, but trini Feels all of it a lot, despite how she acts externally.
> 
> she's not alone either--the rest of the team is on the same page, expressing that anxiety differently. but there's excitement there too, of course! it's a huge deal and an honour to compete!
> 
> then we have the return of our boy krum, who I love. with how much time he canonically spends in the library, I saw a nice opportunity to have him and the kids interact. note again his phrasing--specifically the omission of 'the' and 'a' sometimes in the translation from his better bulgarian/russian over to english.
> 
> alsO CAN I JUST SAY HOW COOL FLEURS CHARMWORK WAS ON THAT FUCKING DRAGON? trini commenting on it was 100% just like, unrestrained awe. very advanced shit, to be able to charm a full grown mother dragon into that kind of a trance at her age. 
> 
> that little bit about cedric being tipped off about the dragon is a canon reference, given harry told him about it after seeing them himself on saturday night.
> 
> the little discussion on how quidditch positions might correlate a bit to personality is something I find FASCINATING. that's my inner jock talking. I remember responding to a comment back on the prologue of this whole thing and talking about how kim and trini's quidditch positions were VERY CAREFULLY CHOSEN--again, quidditch is such a big part of both of their lives, and it's woven right into their characterisations. 
> 
> then that bit where kim says her and zack are both social sevens -- referencing the talks the kids've had about their aritmancy/numerology classifications. I took a bunch of books out of the library way back when I started developing this story in late 2017 and read a LOT about this stuff. all of the kids classifications are incredibly interesting and PERFECT. 
> 
> sidenote, for any of you who know about arithmancy/are curious, there're 2 main types: chaldean and agrippa (pythagorean). the agrippa method has already been mentioned cause it's the simpler of the two and the kids are only in 4th year. they learn the more complicated stuff later on. 
> 
> NOW! I realise there's like 0 reason to tell you guys this, but you know I tend to go on! so I will! something that I changed a bit in this story is that in traditional agrippa method you're supposed to use your full birth name to do the calculations. I do NOT do this. I use the names that the kids use/most identify with. my reasoning is that... hm. there's a lot of magic in a name? and when I was reading about this, one of the library books--when talking about divination by numbers--mentioned a name as having power because it encompasses _everything_ you are.
> 
> I wanted to highlight that aspect, because this story is very much about identity and what it means to be a person in the world--what it means to figure yourself out, to lose yourself, and find yourself again. it's also incredibly queer in a zillion aspects! and something that was super important to me in developing it is including as many _different_ types of kids as I could, from sexual/gender identities to religion, race, creed, etc etc. so in the context of being inclusive to trans & nonbinary peeps (and/or people who change their birth name for whatever reason), I wanted to expand the lore a bit. so in the hogwarts arithmancy class professor vector INSISTS that the kids use the name they most identify with. because that has magic in itself, see?
> 
> PLUS! for my own Accuracy Satisfaction, I also have actual legit arithmancy reasoning: in chaldean, which (again) is more complicated, you're SUPPOSED to use the name you most go by! so it's okay! it's kind of like... in astrology for example most people know their sun signs, but it's best to look at your WHOLE chart if you can for a more all-encompassing picture. the more in-depth you can classify yourself, the better.
> 
> ANYWAY I FUCKING LOVE MAGIC!
> 
> \---
> 
> next time on glee: one of my favourite chapters yet (and I've written staggered bits all the way through to the epilogue already, for the record. incomplete, but over 600k words so far). so yes. next chapter is _entirely_ a trimberly interaction and v soft. LOOK OUT FOR SOME BONDING!
> 
> thanks as always for reading and I appreciate you all. your comments've been so lovely and fuel me. to everyone who doesnt comment, I LOVE YOU A LOT TOO! 
> 
> until next time, and take care <3


	29. Ambulance for the Ambience

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/3KI6te4PrFwNpGI1xsmRJI?si=wTjIH_jgQJeaR2aE15_huQ). it's a perfect song to listen to while you're reading this one, just SAYING. no words, just music. very soft. & by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Hey stranger," comes Kim's low voice.

Trini turns around to see her standing a few feet away between the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw tables, wearing a forest green Slytherin Quidditch crewneck and loose black joggers with a weathered rucksack that's different from her usual one slung over her shoulder. A faded black leather gramophone briefcase is in her left hand, and her hair is damp.

And Kim's regarding Trini with a soft kind of light in her eyes—an appropriate marriage of the early hour and the quickly approaching dawn.

Speaking of which, she should really get going.

"Hey," Trini greets, then grabs a banana and turns to face Kim proper, lifting her legs and spinning on the bench so that her feet are in the aisle. "How's your morning?"

"Surprisingly great, actually," Kim replies, looking like she certainly means it.

Trini smiles. "Any reason you're up, or?"

Kim kind of tilts her head, a twinkle appearing in her eye, at once resembling a little kid who got away with something they shouldn't have. "You know I like the quiet," she answers with a grin, skirting the question. "How about you?"

"Always up anyway, but I'd usually be in my room. Tad bit anxious though—figured I'd go for a walk."

Kim frowns. "Anything I can do?"

Trini shakes her head, getting to her feet. "No, but thanks. Gonna go try to snap myself out of it." She shrugs. "Good old shock method, you know."

And by how Kim nods she _does_ seem to know, which doesn't come as a surprise to Trini, given what Kim told her in Hogsmeade last weekend.

Picking up her winter cloak from where it was bunched up on the bench, Trini holds it firmly at the corners with both hands and moves in a kind of twisting motion, looping her right arm over her head. It spirals around in a nautilus before falling gracefully over her shoulders.

"Are you going outside?"

"Yeah. Like I said — shock method," Trini answers, fastening it at her collarbone. "Though this's more like a light slap than a shock. The cold air usually helps to clear my head."

"Well... er," Kim starts slowly, hiking her bag up on her shoulder, "do you want company?" She pauses, then rushes out her next words, "I mean, like, if it's more of a thing you'd prefer to do alone, I totally get that. Just know having people around can be nice sometimes—"

"Kim," Trini interjects, smiling and shouldering her own rucksack before starting to walk around her. "If you're okay with the cold, I'd love company. But if you're coming we have to go."

"Oh?" Kim says, lurching to grab a couple rolls off the Ravenclaw table and scuttling up to walk shoulder-to-shoulder.

"Yep," Trini chimes, deliberately vague.

Kim watches her curiously but doesn't press, instead digging through her rucksack to bring out her own winter cloak, which she puts on as they stride out of the castle together.

They're walking down the path for a minute when Kim runs a hand through her damp hair and takes a deep breath in and out, closing her eyes contentedly for a moment in the peace of the morning. With a start, Trini hesitates, then reaches back into her rucksack with an awkward twist of her arm, making to grab her scarf out of the main pocket.

Kim looks over at Trini with a warm, amused light in her eyes. "Need help, there?"

Trini resists the urge to huff and sighs a little as she shakes her head, struggling to get at it. "I should've just taken my bag off like a normal person, but I'm committed now."

When she hasn't managed it after another five seconds, Kim swerves in front of her and blocks her path. The gentleness in her stride makes the movement seem slowed down, _feel_ slow against the backdrop of the early morning; like warm honey on its way into a teacup, heavy but comforting in the weight; a sweetness in motion, overflowing.

Both of them stopped now, Kim rests a soft hand on top of Trini's and quirks her eyebrow in question; playfulness in her eyes but with a depth present there that's becoming familiar, that sounds in Trini's mind like the opening guitar chords of U2's ['All I Want Is You'](https://open.spotify.com/track/34sL4eaI8UKWOyYpCvoboU?si=9qhZZJxMQSma8_8V870Jqw): soft, like a person whispering a secret to someone they love in the dark.

She tries not to think about what that means, exactly.

Says instead, "Okay, okay. There's a scarf in my bag, can you grab it?"

Kim smiles lightly, inclining her head. Handing Trini her gramophone briefcase without a word, she brings out the scarf in a sweeping upward arc, appraising with interest. Her eyes travel over the gold and grey paisley. "Silk? This is _beautiful_."

"Put it on," Trini instructs quietly, weaving around Kim and continuing down the path, if only to have the sound of her steps fill her ears again; to drown out that song playing in her head.

Kim makes a surprised little noise and scurries up to walk at her side again. "Me?" she asks, as if there's anyone else around. Still staring down at it, running the cool flowing material through her hands.

Trini can't help but smile softly as she keeps her gaze fixed ahead. "Yes, _you_. Your hair is wet, no? Gonna catch your death out here." She pauses for a few moments, then adds, "It seems thin but it's enchanted to hold in heat."

Kim can't seem to fault that explanation, so she unfolds it and drapes it over her head. After a moment of tying it loosely, she peers at Trini with a grin. "Do I look like a wealthy grandmother?"

Looking over, Trini fights the urge to curse under her breath.

_Does Kim look good in everything?_

"Suits you," Trini replies, and when Kim gives her a disbelieving look, she chuckles. "I'm being serious."

Kim _beams_. "Hey, Being Serious. I'm Kim."

Trini rolls her eyes with such enthusiasm that Kim laughs—really, really laughs, eyes crinkling at the sides and bending forward a little.

And Trini picks up her pace to try and hide her smile, pulling at her grey beanie, a little tick she exhibits when she's anxious.

Though... on the whole, she's finding that Kim's presence is calming her down. Like something tempering which, if she's honest, is unexpected. But she accepts it with a silent thanks put out into the universe; lets out a long breath that clouds, swirls, then dissipates in the chilly air as she leads them off the main path and towards the Quidditch pitch.

As soon as she does, Kim hums softly. "May I ask where we're going?" she asks, voice overly polite, still playful.

Trini pulls at her beanie again. "I want to show you something."

Kim lets out a little sigh at her persistent vagueness, shaking her head fondly, but seems to accept it as they continue their walk down.

When they come to the Quidditch pitch Trini leads them through the south entrance tunnel, into the stadium and across the frozen grass, all the way to the side closest to the west wall of the grounds.

Trini begins climbing the stairs up to the stands but Kim stops at the base. Huffs, pouting. "You didn't mention _stairs_ ," she whines, throwing her head back like a dramatic idiot.

"You're telling me the best Chaser in this school can't handle a bit of a climb?" Trini teases, continuing to ascend. Knowing by now that Kim will follow her despite the dramatics. "Should I call for a litter to carry you up, Your Highness?"

"Oh hah, hah, hah," Kim calls.

Trini looks down through the gaps in the wood stairs to see Kim kind of stand there for a moment, still pouting. After a few seconds she sighs _loudly_ then starts to peel up the stairs two at a time.

And Trini keeps at the same pace until Kim catches up with her, glaring but evidently not winded.

"Thank you for joining us, _Princess Peach_ ," Trini chimes, inclining her head in jest.

"Is that a real person or did you just make that up?"

Trini balks. "Do you not...?" she starts, then sighs. "We'll talk about this another time."

Reaching the stands, Trini walks across so that they're aligned with the centre of the stadium and climbs to the top. Already feeling ten times better now than she did before.

She plops down facing the pitch and digs through her rucksack, out of which she pulls a blanket, thermos of coffee, and a mug. Spreading the blanket out on the wood bench, she takes her wand out and mutters, " _Engorgio_ ," charming it to enlarge enough for them both to sit comfortably.

With one more charm she makes a copy of her mug. Throwing an expectant look at Kim, who's standing in front of her looking both confused and amused, she pats the bench next to her.

Kim sits, pleasantly surprised when Trini hands her the duplicate mug and pours steaming hot coffee into it. "Can I know what's going on now?" she asks, voice softer than it was. Less teasing, more tentative.

Trini pours coffee into her own mug with a practised air of nonchalance. "I've a date."

Kim's brow furrows for a moment, clearly trying to figure out if Trini's pulling her leg or not. She raises an eyebrow, looking around wildly as if expecting someone to pop out of nowhere. "A date? With who?"

Trini smiles, and the timing is _perfect_. "The sun," she says softly, pointing in the direction they're facing, having deliberately chosen this spot a long time ago.

The best seats in the house.

Kim regards her for another second before turning her head and looking, and then _there_ it is: the sun rising over the Forbidden Forest, blinking out at them for a moment sleepily then waking up, light streaking out, illuminating both of their faces in a warm, happy glow.

A soft gasp sounds from Kim next to her.

"Wow."

Because the formerly blueish, fluffy clouds that litter the expanse of space between them and the horizon are changing, and quickly—neon pinks barreling forward into the fray, followed close behind by brilliant yellows. Each chasing the blues and greys out of the sky, separate until they're not, all at once—the two twining around one another, spinning in a kind of harmony that is something _so_ close to musical in Trini's mind, blending into a brilliant orange bright as a blazing fire that soon overtakes the darkness completely.

It's slow first then faster, catching fire and spreading, reaching—

Then, in a blink, everything has changed.

The world is brighter.

Trini watches as it happens, her smile doing a formidable job of mirroring the sight opposite them. She brings her coffee mug up to her lips, blowing on it a little before she unscrews the cap of her thermos—which contains a tiny bit of milk and sugar.

Once it's added she takes a sip. Sighs happily.

"I used to sit out here almost every morning, years ago," Trini begins quietly, eyes still fixed on the horizon. "When I was teaching myself to fly."

Kim's smiles at her phrasing, warm and bright as the sunlight reflecting off her eyes, watching Trini and holding her coffee mug in both hands. Content to listen.

"It became this galvanising thing, almost," Trini continues. "Because I'd been out almost every morning practising like a maniac for a few weeks before I finally just... slowed down. Stopped. Came up here to watch the sunrise deliberately, instead of it being something that happened while I was out here, that occurred on the peripherals of my focus."

Kim continues to smile softly at her, not taking her eyes off Trini's face. And to her own surprise, Trini doesn't find herself feeling self-conscious.

"It was after a particularly frustrating morning. Couldn't get my broom to work the way I wanted," Trini says quietly, shaking her head a little. "After seeing that, though—" she gestures toward the sky, "and this sounds stupid, but I just... didn't feel so frustrated anymore. Watching the sun come up, seeing the light illuminate the pitch like it did—it reminded me that there was still a world outside of all this. Which is a _huge_ cliché, I know—"

"There's nothing wrong with that," Kim says softly, reassuring.

Trini presses her lips together into a light, slightly lopsided smile. Nods. "It kind of just... took the pressure off. And I started having fun with it—stopped worrying about learning specific techniques, or moves, or whatever. I just... started to fly."

Her eyes soften a little, remembering the feeling. "And I told you this the day we met, but that's about the time it became the thing that freed me, you know?" She taps a quiet finger on her coffee mug and slowly turns her head to look at Kim in her peripherals. "When I wasn't overthinking all of the time, or policing myself."

Deep breath in, deep breath out. "That's why I come out here on days that I'm anxious. It still does the same thing after all these years—assures me of something that, no matter how many times I hear it, feel it, see it, never seems to stick in my mind: that there's a world beyond this pitch, this castle."

She meets Kim's eyes then, and in the multitudes of things Trini sees there—both defined and undefined—what is apparent most of all is understanding. And she realises after a moment that this is the first time she's _ever_ brought anyone here to this spot, at this time of day, for this purpose.

But it wasn't intentional, really. Not like Trini planned on showing her this.

Just something that happened. Easily, on its own.

"Thank you for letting me tag along," Kim says quietly, like she read her mind.

"It's actually nice having someone else here," Trini returns, smiling at her. She jerks her head toward Kim's gramophone case. "Especially when they bring one of those."

Kim blinks, seemingly having forgot that she brought it at all. "Ah. Yeah, I was using it this morning. But I wouldn't want to mess with your space, Trin."

The nickname sends little shocks shooting through Trini, just like the first time Kim used it, and she has to pause before she responds, waiting a few moments before realising she doesn't know what Kim means.

"Mess with my space?"

Kim hums, gestures vaguely at the stadium in a way that's gentle, somehow. Considerate, respectful. "I mean, play music in the peace of all of this."

"Ah," Trini says, then frowns. "Funny enough, I haven't ever played music during this particular activity—never brought my gramophone down here when I was learning 'cause I was scared someone would hear. Didn't wanna be found out."

"I'm not sure I can picture first-year you," Kim chimes, eyes twinkling like they've absorbed the sunrise.

"First-year me was afraid of heights."

Kim laughs. "What?!"

Trini nods. "True story. Didn't have the guts I do now—" she grins and Kim returns it, "I'd just got here and was afraid that they were gonna throw me out for any kind of infraction. But..." she trails off, contemplating. "I don't think music'd be a bad thing, Kim. This might be just me, but I don't think music is ever a bad thing."

Kim shakes her head. "No, I don't either. Just trying to be considerate."

Trini smiles. "And I appreciate that." She pauses, eyeing the gramophone again. "But... do you want to play something? Or should I peruse your record collection with judgement and pick something myself?"

Kim rolls her eyes, smirks. "I don't keep my entire collection in here. This isn't my proper one—" she runs a finger along the scratches and scuffs on the square case, "I just use it when I'm outside of my dorm."

"Makes sense," Trini says, nodding. "I really need to retire mine and upgrade, then I'll have a beater for occasions like this. But a new one isn't really in the cards for me at the moment."

It's a nicer way of saying that she can't afford one, because good gramophones cost a pretty penny. And the ones they have to use at Hogwarts aren't like the proper turntable her dad has at home—they're hand-crank, mechanical machines. Entirely not electric due to how magic tends to interact not at all well with electricity.

And the gramophones that actually work at Hogwarts technically should _never_ be used to play a vinyl album, given they're made for a different, older format of record that was standard in the first half of the century. The mechanism in a gramophone _should_ tear into a modern vinyl record like a knife whittling a wax candle, but with magic thrown into the mix, all of the problems evaporate.

In a professional witch or wizard's hands a mechanical gramophone can be modified for magical use, allowing newer records to be played in magical institutions, buildings, and communities. That's a large part of why they're so expensive—it's a niche service, and if you want to hire someone reputable who will get the gramophone playing at _optimal_ sound quality, you certainly have to pay for it.

That's not to mention the cost of fixing them if anything wears out, brought on by the reality of just how old they are. The last mechanical gramophones were manufactured in the late 1950's, so the newest possible—and most expensive—units were made thirty-five years ago.

As for Trini's, it's pushing _sixty-five_.

But she's taught herself how to tinker with hers over the years. She's always had a knack for mechanics—it runs in her family, after all—and has successfully made little improvements, rendering hers more impressive-sounding than it would be otherwise. It's served her well and is one of her most prized possessions.

Kim turns to pat hers. "This one was a lucky find in a muggle shop. I needed another to bring with me places, because my proper one is my _baby_ and I couldn't risk it."

Trini laughs lightly. "I understand completely." She leans forward a little to get a better look: the whole thing is beat up, sure, but it's evident that Kim's made an effort to take very good care of it otherwise. "Wait, is this a Trench?"

"Yes!" Kim exclaims, a surprised happy sound, seemingly delighted Trini recognised it. "Mind, mine is a _2A_. Made in 1926—so 'Trench-style' might be more appropriate."

Trini smiles wide. "I've a _Decca 120_. Which, before you click your tongue at it—"

"I wasn't _going_ to," Kim interjects, narrowing her eyes and clutching at her chest. Feigning deep offense.

"Mmm, whatever you say. But I fitted it with a _Meltrope III—_ "

Kim scoffs. "Literally the best soundbox ever made," she interjects again, drily. "Why, yes, continue telling me how I would turn my nose up at this absolute _rubbish_ gramophone, won't you."

Trini shoves her shoulder. "Alright, alright, that wasn't fair. But all I'm saying is with that modification, plus the _Dual Audioscopic_ horn, right—it could probably almost hold its own with whatever rad..." she considers Kim for a moment, " _HMV..._? you have."

Kim opens her mouth then closes it, and Trini gives her a satisfied nod at clearly having called it right.

"Okay," Kim mutters, smiling wide, "I know you probably meant that as a jab, but I'm actually flattered."

Trini waves her hand. "Just figured." And it's not that she means it as a bad thing, Kim having a top-of-the-line gramophone. Like Kim said, it's more of a compliment than anything. "What model?" she asks, more curious than she's trying to let on.

"A _102_ ," Kim replies, a faint blush colouring her cheeks, now. She puts a hand on the back of her neck and grips at it for a moment, giving Trini a shy smile, then removes it to put her index finger in the air. "Gift from my mum _and_ grandparents put together, in my defense. I'm born in February, so it was a combined Christmas and birthday thing."

Trini nods. "Erm, brief addendum to what I said: mine could definitely _not_ hold its own with yours," she admits, grinning then waving her hand dismissively. "But mate, no need to defend anything. I'm just messing with you." She pauses, throwing a questioning look at Kim. "I _would_ love to hear something on that sometime, though, if you'd oblige me."

"Absolutely," Kim answers without hesitation. "The first time I heard it I cried." She sees Trini's quirked brow and tips her head a little, eyes serious. "You think I'm being facetious but I'm not."

Trini chuckles. "No, I can see that. I'll bring tissues for when you show it to me."

They kind of stare at each other for a moment, both smiling, and Kim grabs her beater gramophone—a _Decca Junior 2A_ , a later-generation take on the original model, nicknamed the 'Trench' because of its popularity with muggle soldiers in the First World War. Made by the same company as Trini's.

And Trini would never judge someone based on their music taste, or whether they know little tidbits of information about gramophones—she finds people who do that pompous and ridiculous—but it's cool that Kim knows the history all the same.

"I've never actually heard one of these," Trini mutters. At that, Kim reaches across to deposit it on her lap, gesturing for her to take a look.

"They're really great little guys," Kim says fondly, reaching over again to unbuckle the case for Trini. "Tough as nails, which is why when I found it—and already knowing what I wanted to use it for—it sort of felt like fate."

Trini smiles, opening the case. It's certainly had a lot of use but Kim keeps it in good shape, if the well-polished silver parts are anything to go by. Kim sticks her hand into a sleeve that's been installed on the lid of the case, reaching down into it up to past her elbow—clearly magicked with an Extension Charm—and pulls out an album that Trini recognises immediately: the Stone Roses self-titled LP.

"Was listening to this earlier," Kim explains, handing it to Trini. It's a beautiful cover: green and black and white paint splattered about, looking like something Jackson Pollock would dream up. "One of my favourites."

" _Yessssssssss_ ," Trini murmurs, drawing the word out dramatically and throwing her head back a little in appreciation. "Mine too."

Kim smiles, pleased. "You, me, and the rest of Britain."

"Tired of it after this morning? Or would you mind playing it again?"

"Never could tire of this one," Kim replies easily, taking the LP from Trini's hands gently and removing the sleeve before setting it up on top of the green felt tray. "But if I may, I think a particular song—" she positions the needle carefully, "would be perfect for right now."

The fourth song on the album, ['Don't Stop'](https://open.spotify.com/track/2V27EJCAIW5ePRCvWCrpvg?si=H3bcj17JTde0KI88jbdO5w) starts to play and Trini smiles wide. Closes her eyes as a feeling something like a high sweeps through her brain. Kim picks the gramophone up and moves a bit down the stands, placing it a bit away from them then returning to sit next to Trini.

"This is good. I like you," she mutters, opening one eye and squinting at Kim playfully.

"Finally!" Kim exclaims, pumping her fist in the air and bringing it down slowly like a goofy, theatrical idiot. "If I'd have known this album'd be the deciding factor, I would've led with: 'Hi, I'm Kim, and I like the Stone Roses.'"

Trini rolls her eyes. "Okay, nope. Changed my mind—you're too much of a dork."

Kim scoffs, smirking, and they fall into a comfortable silence as the song plays around them, each looking out over the Quidditch pitch and sipping their coffee contentedly.

"So can I ask what kind of music you like, then?" Kim tries a minute later, voice a bit playful again.

Trini hums, shrugs. "I know everyone always says this, but I try to keep my options open." She pauses, tipping her head to the side a little, considering. "I mean, I'd probably say alt-rock? Indie, Britpop, post-punk... but hip-hop and shit too."

Kim nods slowly. "We probably have some overlap then. No pressure but, like, when you're thinking of bands you're a fan of, what comes to mind?"

Trini considers for a few moments, at ease with the question itself but finding it hard to answer. "That's so hard."

"I don't mean it binding," Kim says lightly, shaking her head with a smile. "Like, how about this: off the top of your head what're some bands you've listened to recently?"

"Er," Trini mutters, then hums. "Alright — Oasis, New Order, Joy Division are the three most recent, I believe."

"You say all of that and I hear Manchester," Kim chirps. "Those plus the Stone Roses. Quite the trend."

Trini scoffs. "Okay, reductive. I'll keep going with the recent ones—which are decidedly _not_ Manchester, thank you." She pauses, frowning. "That'd be..." she starts counting off on her fingers, "The Cure, U2, Public Enemy, Radiohead, The Tragically Hip—"

"Wait, wait," Kim interjects, looking dumbfounded. "You like the Hip?"

Equally bewildered, Trini blinks back at her. "You _know_ the Hip?"

Kim nods earnestly. "Yeah! And, like, I don't mean that as a condescending—" her voice changes to a mocking, pompous kind of thing, "'Oho, _you_ know the Hip?'" she says quickly, and her voice returns to normal for her next words, "They're too little for that anyway — I just mean that I've never met anyone outside of Tommy and Jason and their families who does."

Trini smiles, understanding. The Tragically Hip is one of her favourite bands, but they've never really gained traction anywhere outside of Canada, so Kim knowing them at all is a super cool surprise. "Yeah. My dad picked [_Road Apples_](https://open.spotify.com/album/2QNTZHxK2b7QAHiKbZZHzz?si=U7BTXi4mR-63emE6_wfbrA) up out of a bargain box a few years ago. Right after hearing it we went and bought their other two releases." She tips her head. "Rest is history."

"Tommy's mum's side of the family is Canadian," Kim explains, looking at Trini with something indiscernible flickering in her eyes. "They used to play the Hip _all_ of the time. I associate their music with such... goodness." She pauses, humming. "Can't explain it."

"You've memories tied to it. I get you."

Kim nods. "Yeah. And I know they had another release in the last couple months, but I can't find anyone in my House who has it—"

"I do," Trini chimes, smiling.

Kim blinks. " _Mate_. Can I borrow it?" she asks, looking like her words escaped her mouth before she had a chance to vet them. Quickly adds, "Please?"

"Of course."

Kim lays back on the bench abruptly, splaying her arms out. "This is great."

They keep talking like that, each learning more and more about the other's music taste; even after a half hour Trini could keep going forever with it, but they're pushing it time-wise. They have class soon.

When Trini announces this Kim sighs, getting up and putting the Stone Roses album back into her gramophone case carefully. "How're you feeling now? With the anxiety?"

Trini shakes her head. "Subsided. Honestly, I've noticed a bit of a pattern with Thursdays over the past couple weeks? What with Snape and the poison." She shrugs, packing her stuff into her rucksack and slinging it over one shoulder. "That's likely all it is."

And Trini full well knows that's not entirely true—she's mostly feeling like this because of Cedric participating in the Tournament, but she doesn't want to be too whiny.

It's going to be just fine.

Kim nods. "Understandable. But I'm glad it's calmed down a little—and I see how being out here could help, now." She looks around as they start to make their way back towards the stairs. "It's beautiful. Thank you again for showing me this."

Trini smiles, watching the gentle breeze play with Kim's hair as she adjusts the scarf a little. "Thank _you_ for coming with me. You're decent company."

Kim beams like an idiot. "You're not so bad yourself, Trin."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title track is 'ambulance for the ambience' by broken social scene.
> 
> \---
> 
> SO! this's the morning after last chapter and a Very Soft encounter. got to watch these two and their dynamic for a more extended period of time! it's growing and developing!
> 
> first off, the scarf trini lent to kim was her abuelas. trinis dad charmed it and gave it to her as a gift back in the day, and it's trinis now.
> 
> as for her telling kim to put it on -- remember, trini's way of showing affection is Very physical. kim's is very much in talking and listening. obviously they do other things but that's the boiled down of it! trini doesnt want her to catch a cold!
> 
> that bit about the first few notes of 'all i want is you' being what trini hears is also part of how trini (and kim) tend to Feel Things. (PLEASE LISTEN TO IT TO UNDERSTAND. just the first few notes before the singing.) 
> 
> but yes, trini is also very visual cause she paints--she'll always describe things more vividly in her minds eye than kim does, chapter-to-chapter. but they both have very emotional responses to music; when trying to put feelings into some kind of more concrete understanding, it is VERY!!!! helpful.
> 
> now, the GRAMOPHONES! that shit took a long time to figure out--how exactly people at hogwarts listen to records specifically and who would own what unit. like, YES they have gramophones in the HP movies but theyre the OLD mechanical ones, which again are NOT SUPPOSED to play modern vinyl records. so for it to be Relevant to 90s teenagers who listen to music (that majority is on newer records), magic is the fix. and it's relatively simple in this context -- just a matter of making the arm of the thing not as heavy and the needle a tad bit different... maybe a slight amplifying spell in the unit itself and some light reworking. definitely is one of those wizarding jobs that i'd love to have in this universe.
> 
> BUT YEAH I HAD TO READ A LOT ABOUT GRAMOPHONE MECHANICS! MANY BOOKS! so... forgive the bits about the specifics. it ORIGINALLY WAS MUCH MORE IN DEPTH and you should know that I am doing you a SERVICE by cutting it down. I had to reel it back in order to like... miss me with the moby dick effect of having half the book just... about... whaling. u kno? WHICH IS COOL IF YOU LIKE WHALING! BUT YES!
> 
> anyway. kim's beater looks like [this](https://www.thegramophonecollector.com/photos/DSCF0230.JPG) and trini's looks like [this](http://www.graham-ophones.co.uk/communities/4/004/012/101/264//images/4621418116.jpg).
> 
> I'll show you kim's 102 in a future a/n, when her and trini have their little listening hangout. it's pretty much the best mechanical gramophone you can get (like, when we're talking consumer portable types). a 102C specifically. good shit. and if you're wondering about HMV... yes, _that_ HMV. back in the day they were on some good shit before their empire CRUMBLED. but in the timeline of the story, that company is still in its prime. kim and tommy visit a HUGE hmv shop in london during christmas of... year 5. I believe. a huge space full of records is kims (and trinis) idea of heaven, after all.
> 
> but yes! bit of a glimpse into trini's music taste. kim will outline her own when trini asks her in a few chapters. in short, trini's is VERY brit while kim's has much more american influence. that's a major simplification but there you go. also the bit about kim being introduced to the tragically hip via tommy? that's a nod to tommy being half inuit on her mum's side! aka from northern canada. tommy is first gen born in the uk.
> 
> SIGH! the tragically hip as a band becomes a little thing between trini and kim. you will see as time goes on. it warms my heart a lot. note specifically the songs 'scared' and 'long time running' but there are SO MANY MORE. 
> 
> funny thing -- that bit about trini having a date with the sun? such poor wording, trini. what are you DOING? like, we weren't seeing that from kim's perspective, but kill bill sirens went off in her head. after that whole misunderstanding with her thinking trini hooked up with someone, kim was like IS SOME GIRL ABOUT TO COME OUT HERE RIGHT NOW? fully about to CUT somebody for like, 3 seconds. (and she certainly didn't think that was trini's suave way of asking her out, by the by. kim isn't even considering trini would be interested in her that way at all. not yet.) but JUST YOU WAIT KIM! 
> 
> I think that's it...? yes? good!
> 
> \---
> 
> thanks for reading as always. hope you enjoyed the softness between these two. they're LEARNING ABOUT EACH OTHER! & next chapter is another fun interaction. not as much one on one, but look forward to some serious roasting of trini (with kim there, delighted) thanks to the hufflepuffs.
> 
> happy almost hanukkah, christmas, kwanzaa, winter solstice, yuletide... and various other lovely holidays to you all. take care <3


	30. Livewire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/6bpBsotzL05UzS1rHsIqk8?si=MXXd621VREK2XRk0f7JKPQ). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"I'm glad we survived that."

"Me too, Trini."

Trini and Billy are walking upstairs from Potions with the rest of the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw fourth-years around them. All feeling grateful that they're alive, given Snape didn't manage to poison anyone during the lesson.

Five down, three more to go until winter break. Over halfway, now.

Trini sighs.

The group of them—all mentally exhausted from another will-he-or-won't-he ordeal—stream into the Great Hall for lunch, with Billy bidding her goodbye before making a beeline for the Gryffindor table, to where Jason's sat, talking to Zack.

Cedric catches her eye and jerks his head in greeting from the Hufflepuff table, a soft smile on his face, and she gives him a little nod in acknowledgement. Gia, Summer, and Chip go down one side and Trini walks down the other to sit next to him.

"Small," Cedric greets happily, his face in much better shape already than it was two days ago—the injury there merely looking like an angry sunburn at this point.

"Tall."

"T, can you pass the salt, please?" Chip asks, already sat opposite Cedric, her eyes trained on a shaker to Trini's left.

She does, giving it a little toss. Chip catches it easily with one hand then promptly begins salting her butternut squash soup, and after watching her for a moment, Trini ladles herself a bowl as well.

Beginning to eat and chatting away with her Housemates around her, Trini relaxes her shoulders.

Around halfway through their lunch hour she's taking a sip of her pumpkin juice when she spots Kim walk into the Great Hall with another Slytherin girl: Rose, Trini knows.

Kim bids her goodbye with a genuine smile, continuing further into the hall alone and breezing by everyone. Turning a few heads—boys, especially—as she does, like always.

It's nearly impossible for people _not_ to do a double-take when they see Kimberly Hart, apparently. But Kim pays them no mind, always moving—always chased, but never caught. Gaze fixed ahead.

That's until she passes by Ravenclaw and her focus shifts to the Hufflepuff table, eventually finding Trini.

And Kim meets her eyes. Smiles so warmly that it makes Trini feel like the most important person in the whole place.

It's hard not to feel like that, really. Because so many people have their attention fixed on Kim, but she's not looking at _any_ of them.

No, not at anyone but Trini.

A tiny quirk of Kim's eyebrow, then, as her warm smile changes to a smirk, a challenge, a question. Asking Trini something like,

_'Are you going to stay there all day, or?'_

Trini quirks her eyebrow right back, defiant, as if to reply,

_'That's the plan.'_

Because, sure, she _was_ intending to sit with them at the Gryffindor table in a few minutes, but Kim doesn't have to know that. Trini doesn't want anyone to think she can just be summoned at their leisure, after all.

Plus, it's more fun to toy with Kim a little.

And after a moment Trini thinks she's won, that Kim's about to sail past—continue on her course to sit on Jason and Zack's side of the Gryffindor table—when she turns neatly on a dime, striding right up the aisle towards Trini with a glint in her eye.

She very well could just be walking to sit next to Billy—

Nope. Passed right by the boys. Jason and Zack's heads turn to follow her, frowning.

_Called out. Oh no._

Trini turns back to her soup and stares it down in a way that suggests she's looking to portal through it to another dimension; focuses on keeping the rest of her body language nonchalant.

But the internal panic must show on her face, because Summer looks at her across the table, squints, then turns her head to the right.

Apparently seeing Kim on the approach, Summer smiles with straight up _glee_ , looking like she's just received a present. "Hello Kim," she greets happily. "What can we do for you on this fine Thursday afternoon?"

And Summer's question is genuine, though her tone is dripping with mirth, clearly reading the situation to see that Kim is the reason for Trini's sudden and very _intense_ fascination with her soup. Various other greetings sound from around the table, with Aisha, Tanya, Gia, and Cedric taking a particular interest in Kim's arrival, all joining Summer in grinning devilishly at Trini.

_Oh no, no, no._

And Trini doesn't turn around, but she hears Kim's low voice sound from right behind her, oddly chipper and ringing with something that's easily identifiable as absolute _delight_ , "Hi everyone. Just wondering if I could steal Trini, here. Thought she could spend the rest of the lunch hour with us next door."

Trini grunts. "Nah. I've reached my quota."

"But _T_ ," Summer says sweetly, with an air of very, very faux-confusion, "didn't you just say a few minutes ago that you were about to go sit over there?"

Aisha, Tanya, Gia, and Cedric come soaring into the conversation one after the other, not missing a beat,

"To which we all sobbed with despair—"

"But, alas, our Trini must set sail and explore the world—"

"Our little chicken in flight—"

" _Do_ tell her to write us, won't you Hart—"

"Oh my god," Trini groans, bringing her arms up onto the table and dropping her head down dramatically, burrowing her face in the crook of her elbow for good measure.

There are chuckles from her _attackers_ , all sounding like they're quite pleased with themselves. From her place hiding in her robes she hears a smack of a high five, which is immediately followed by three more.

She chances a peek out, just enough to grumble at Summer, "I _was_ going to, but I changed my mind."

There's a pause before Kim's voice sounds again, "Well, in that case..."

Trini feels Cedric move away from her down the bench like a _traitor_ , his body heat gone, before it's replaced by who other than Kim, taking a seat beside her.

"So, Hufflepuffs. Tell me something about Trini that I don't know," she says pointedly, clearly intent on making Trini suffer for her stubbornness.

And Trini doesn't even have to see their faces—at the charged pause that follows Kim's words, she can _feel_ them all itching to throw her under the bus.

In all her life, she's never been more sure of an impending, absolute _roast._

"Okay, me first," Gia chimes, then clears her throat like an idiot. "Our scene opens in Greenhouse Three, where our class was re-potting baby Mandrakes in second year—"

"Nope," Trini grunts, immediately aware of where this is going. With a lurch she rises out of her dark, robed elbow-haven and squints at the lights, shaking her head and getting to her feet. She steps over the bench and out from underneath the table then waits in the aisle, staring down at Kim expectantly. "You coming?"

Kim looks up at her with a playful twinkle in her eye. "In a minute—I _think_ I understand why you wanted to stay here now." She turns back to Gia. "Sorry to interrupt. Please do continue."

Gia grins. "And you remember that Sprout had us all wear earmuffs, right. But our girl Trini here, as fate would have it, got a mosquito bite _just_ beneath her ear the day before, after going on one of her broody trips down to the Quidditch pitch alone—"

" _Kim_ ," Trini whines, throwing her head back to the ceiling. Resisting the urge to pout.

Kim reaches back blindly and brushes her fingers against Trini's, just once, wordlessly telling her to wait a little bit longer. At the action—specifically the ever-occurring electric shock that runs up her arm and through her whole body without mercy as a result—Trini's brain shorts out and shuts off completely.

"So we all have our earmuffs on, aye. And she's done well with her image by that point," Gia explains, "with most people knowing she's this Tough Kid. So she picks the Mandrake up all confident, places it into a new pot no problem, but as she's about to start scooping dirt on the little devil, she goes to scratch her ear absentmindedly—"

"Poor dear," Summer quips.

Trini's brain reboots. "It was itchy!" she huffs, crossing her arms.

"Moved the earmuff just enough," Gia continues, grinning. "Didn't even think, and she's lights out like—" she snaps her fingers, " _that_. Falls like a teeny, tiny felled tree right into one of those giant canvas bags full of Professor Sprout's _preferred fertiliser_."

And Trini can't see Kim's face, but she knows she's enjoying every second of this. She sighs loudly then tries to salvage some of her image. "I was out for hours after that and woke up relatively clean in the hospital wing." Shrugging, she pauses. "No harm done. Not that these knobs'll ever let me live it down."

"We're better than we were, though," Roger chirps, getting in on the action. He looks at Kim. "For a long time we all called her 'DeeDee—'"

"'Dragon Dung,'" Chip adds, tone helpful, "see?"

Roger nods. "But in all seriousness, never in a mean way. Just giving her a hard time."

Gia hums. "And she certainly gave us hell for it—"

" _Listen_ ," Summer interjects, holding up her hand to halt the rest, voice grave. "None of these morons know hell, alright. This bitch charmed a bed sheet to _whisper my name_ then made it float above me as I slept one night, all creepy and shit, as punishment. I learned my lesson, and I'll _never_ sleep in a canopy bed now, not even if you paid me."

Everyone laughs, Kim included, and Trini has to hold back a smile. "Are we done now?" she mutters, looking around at all of them. And she knows the teasing is out of love—it doesn't actually bother her. The mortifying embarrassment is regrettable, but what can you do.

They all know she would rip them out in the exact same way if the roles were reversed.

Roger and Gia share a look, pretending to consider letting up before they dive right in again, trading lines, recounting the story to Kim back and forth in a spitfire:

"So she got all of us in one way or another, definitely—" Roger says, grimacing.

Gia nods. "But, Merlin, if _anyone_ she didn't know well called her that—"

Roger whistles lowly. "Example one and only: this pompous prat in our year—Ernie—used it once—"

"In the middle of Herbology a couple weeks later," Gia explains. "Just said it to her, pretending like he was some important git who didn't know her actual name—"

Roger nods. "Which he definitely did."

"Gobshite," Trini mutters.

"And she jinxed him into _oblivion—_ " Gia says, smiling wistfully at the memory.

"He's still afraid of her to this day," Roger mutters, in a tone that suggests he can relate.

"Because the stones on this one, right," Gia recounts fondly, nodding in Trini's direction with a proud grin. "She just did it right there in the middle of the greenhouse, not giving a fuck."

"I got detention for a week," Trini adds, accepting her fate, now, of dying today—here, in the Great Hall—of embarrassment. Might as well help the story along and get it over with.

"You did, but I swear Sprout heard him say it, or she _knew_ somehow," Gia muses, then meets Kim's eyes again. "'Cause all she had to do for her sentence was go around and water the plants in the common room." She pauses. "Aye, they all love her now, the cacti in particular—"

Summer pulls a face. "They sing with her like she's some kind of Disney princess, it's nauseating—"

"O K A Y!" Trini says loudly, voice slightly muffled by how her hand is covering her own face now, peering through her fingers to try and mask her horror.

"It's more like a hum, but it's _adorable_ ," Gia mutters, then looks to Summer as an afterthought, drawing her wand from her sleeve with a flourish. "S, you want a Cheering Charm, love?"

"Piss off," Summer mumbles, shoulder-checking her.

Giving up on trying to get them to stop, Trini takes a step forward and hooks her arms underneath Kim's, chest flush up against her back. With a lurch, she begins gently but firmly hoisting Kim up, who has no choice but to comply or else be pulled from the bench onto the floor.

And Kim sags, deliberately making herself dead weight until Trini pulls her completely to her feet. When she's standing proper, she steps over the bench and sends a playful, still very amused smile at Trini. "So small yet so strong," she says, in her most silly voice.

"Yeah, yeah," Trini mutters, pulling her by the elbow away from the Hufflepuff table. "Thanks for that, you sodding traitors!" she calls over her shoulder.

Multiple variations of, "Anytime!" and "You're welcome!" are their replies, and Trini rolls her eyes.

She steers Kim over to where Billy's sat opposite Jason and Zack, gesturing for her to sit once they arrive. Kim does obediently, though Trini makes sure to leave no space between them on the bench, just in case Kim tries to make a break for it.

"Hi guys," Kim chirps, smiling wide at the looks of confusion on their faces. "Lovely day, isn't it?"

Jason looks between them, gaze calculating. "Everything okay?"

"Oh, it's brilliant," Trini says drily.

Billy doesn't catch the tone and continues along, "Not including Jason and Tommy's birthday celebration, is that the first time you've sat at the Hufflepuff table, Kim?"

Kim nods. "Yep. Very interesting topic of conversation," she replies, turning her head to look at Trini with mischief in her eyes.

Trini glares. "Was it?" she asks, voice a low growl, _daring_ Kim to repeat any of it.

There's a pause where Kim gulps, eyes widening a little. She holds Trini's gaze for a moment with a slightly open mouth before she turns back to look between the boys, speaking quickly, "I mean, like, not _super_ interesting, no..." she trails off, clears her throat. To her credit, looking a tad bit flustered at Trini's tone. "So er, how has your lunch been, boys?"

Internally, Trini's ego is hopping around at getting Kim to back down. Maybe she should use her Danger Voice more often.

Jason and Zack are wearing matching looks that say, ' _Really?_ ' but Billy manages to save Trini from any further line of questioning. "Lunch's been good. We were talking about how it's finally starting to feel like the lead up to the holidays, what with the First Task over with."

Kim starts humming ['It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas'](https://open.spotify.com/track/2pXpURmn6zC5ZYDMms6fwa?si=66zRmvX_RoOOcalt4kA-4A) under her breath, dishing food onto her plate and placing a custard tart in front of Trini for good measure. And Trini can't help but smile softly at this less-guarded Kim, this lighter, more at ease person she's been privy to since their talk in Hogsmeade last weekend.

It's as if Kim's given herself permission to really trust Trini, now. To be who she is without pretense or expectation.

And watching Kim, who's tucking in to her food happily, Trini has a fleeting thought that, if she's honest, she would endure a hundred more embarrassing episodes of Let's Talk About Trini if it meant that she got to learn even a _tiny bit_ about Kim in return.

Because with how she's smiling right now, with the way she was looking at Trini earlier, with the progress they've made even in the last week... somehow, it's like the scales have tipped in Trini's mind. Like every bit of risk in getting to know Kim—in opening up and trusting this person who makes Trini feel so fucking off-kilter all of the time—is suddenly and completely outweighed by the reward, no contest.

Three months, almost. That's how long it took for Kim to set herself up and move into a spot in Trini's life.

For all she knows, this could've been in the cards since the day they met; an inevitability as certain as the sunrise they watched together this morning, set in place in some beginning unknown. Determined by some star or some planet, some explosion of light before either of them existed as they are now.

And as Trini begins to eat, feeling Kim beside her, the sides of their bodies still pressed together, she finds herself okay with the unknown, for once.

Finds herself certain that beginning to know is enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'livewire' by oh wonder.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO! HAPPY HOLIDAZE TO YA ALL!
> 
> getting into some teasing between trini and kim here. I appreciate their banter so much, and them getting to a more comfortable place with each other is something that's happening slowly but surely. such a pleasure to watch it develop. AND! kim becoming more familiar with trini's hufflepuff family! these worlds are melding together! it doesnt have to be one or the other!
> 
> I'm sure you caught that the little deedee bit is a nod to the 'didi' nickname trini had in MMPR. there's a bit of that in the 2017 movie as well, as full of easter eggs as it is. dragon dung is indeed professor sprout's preferred fertiliser in HP canon!
> 
> again, the bit with snape threatening to poison them all as a quiz is straight out of GoF. as is the test that'll be coming up in the final week of classes. typical snape nonsense!
> 
> but yes. all of the hufflepuffs beginning to catch on to trini's little kim crush is... so pure. there's very much a sibling relationship there with trini between the members of the quidditch team and her roommates especially, and they're all THRILLED to be able to poke fun at her about it.
> 
> & that 'little chicken' bit is a nod to what the 2017 movie cast called becky! :) it's a lovely nickname and I'm a fan. gia tends to use it, and did a few chapters ago already.
> 
> but yeah. everyone's getting comfortable! wahoo!
> 
> \---
> 
> thanks so much for reading, as always. I appreciate comments A WHOLE LOT AND REMINDER THAT THEY FUEL ME! I can't thank all of you enough who have taken the time to comment so far, even once. each and every one makes my day, truly. for those of you who don't comment but still read every update, I APPRECIATE YOU LIKE CRAZY AS WELL! thank you for your readership and coming along on this journey with me.
> 
> take care, everyone! happy holidays -- hope this quicker update gave you a bit of something fun to read if you were looking for a way to pass the time <3


	31. Human Name

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/2CYqjGBuDtQ0JTA3gxxVaj?si=0GW_7F0iStOtkWrcdCee-g). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

November's final days are windy and sleeting, the weather uncooperative and unwelcoming as the five of them forgo their regular Quidditch pick-up games in favour of more hours spent in the library preparing for end of term.

On Sunday morning Trini's sat with Zack in a library nook containing a few of the coveted squishy armchairs, her managing to get there before anyone else and save him one. She's got one leg draped over an armrest and is half dozing, half reading her Astronomy textbook as he sits with his back up against the front of her chair with his huge star chart spread out on the smooth hardwood floor.

There aren't many people here yet, most preferring to sleep in a bit on weekends. It's nice, calming; easy like it always is when it's just the two of them. He's a gentle balm on the crackling energy that's been building up inside her for the last few days.

Trini sighs heavily and peers over Zack's shoulder, mind restless with being cooped up inside the castle all week, sheltering from the inclement weather, save for the single clear morning three days ago where she went down to the pitch with Kim to watch the sun rise. They've been playing Quidditch multiple times a week for months now—the change in routine, now lacking a physical outlet, is making her antsy.

She watches Zack draw lines between carefully-drawn constellations with a pencil and ruler, tongue between his teeth. Seeming to sense her eyes, he turns his head to the side and gives her a little nod, eyes not leaving his chart. "You okay?"

Trini hums out a small groan, tipping her head back. "I might go for a walk outside or something."

He looks pointedly over to the window ten feet or so from them, where the frosted glass is being pelted gently with small bits of hail coming down from the dark grey clouds above. "Oh yeah?" he says, teasing in his tone.

She huffs and turns to dig into her rucksack, peering around for any signs of Madam Pince before taking a glazed doughnut out of a brown paper bag and biting into it. "I could do sprints around the library," she deadpans, the sugar coating the roof of her mouth, "but I feel like that may not go over well."

He nods slowly, brow furrowing. "Well, it's Sagittarius season," he mutters sagely, gesturing to his chart.

Trini shoots the back of his head a blank look. "And?"

"It's all chaotic energy, innit?" he murmurs, tapping his pencil on his thigh. "Flighty, all-in, restless type of shit. And you're a Leo, too, which just means more fire on top of your usual."

Trini frowns, surprised. "Didn't realise you knew anything about astrology."

He shrugs. "I don't, really. Just saying."

"So what, I should embrace the chaos? Pop up and do jumping jacks?"

"I mean," he says slowly, then smirks a little. "Jupiter's the lucky planet, mate. Maybe do a few push-ups, then channel that shit and plant one on our resident emo princess—"

Trini smacks him on the back of the head, and he brings his hands up, leaning forward to get out of her reach. "You're in denial, it's cool. Still love you."

"Fancying straight girls isn't in my wheelhouse," Trini mutters, tipping a bit off her chair to shove him between the shoulder blades for good measure.

Zack shakes his head. "Who says she's straight? You _seen_ how she looks at you?"

Trini's heartbeat picks up speed, and she tries to keep her voice even, eyes on her textbook, "She looks at me how she looks at her other friends. Don't push it, Z."

He sighs, and it's a more serious, frustrated sound than she's used to hearing from him. Turns around on the floor to try and meet her eyes. "Look, I get it—"

She raises her head and quirks an eyebrow, and he hesitates. "I mean, I don't get it completely. I've never fancied a bloke, per se, but this isn't really about that, is it? She's your friend—our friend—and you don't want to throw a spanner in the works, right?"

"Mate, I _really_ don't want to talk about this."

He shakes his head. "Here's the thing though — you might not want to now, but if you're actually starting to get feelings for her, you're gonna have to eventually. Who in the five of us are you going to talk with about it? Not Jase 'cause he's too close to her. And I'm not sure if you've hit that level of honesty with Billy yet."

Trini meets his eyes, jaw jumping under her skin, and he continues, "Not a ton of people get Kim, you know? And you sure as hell make sure that not many people get you. But you've opened up with me, and I'm on my way with her..." he trails off, sighing heavily. "Just trust me once in awhile, won't you?"

There's a few moments of silence between them where Trini plays with the corner of her textbook. "I'm not asking you to let me braid your hair and gossip for hours," he adds quietly. "But I've got your back."

Trini sighs, brow twitching. "I don't _like_ like her, okay?" She shakes her head, willing her words to form into something that makes a shred of sense. "Sure, I think she's beautiful—who fucking doesn't—and she's funny and amazing, but we haven't known her long." She pauses, frowning. "How do you even tell when you fancy someone? What does that even mean?"

And to Zack's credit, he doesn't make a joke. He hesitates, and his voice is softer when he replies, "I think... like, if you want to spend time with them, if you find yourself interested in what they're interested in, that's something? Wanting to get closer, wanting to know every part of who they are."

"Isn't that just... friendship, though?" she says with a smirk, letting out a small chuckle. "I mean, I want to know more about you, but I wouldn't wanna kiss you."

Zack nods slowly, smiling back. "It can be friendship, yeah. But you know it isn't the same—there's that heart flutter." There's another pause where Trini considers, actively trying not to deflect or change the subject. "Here's a question: if she wanted to kiss you, would you kiss her back?"

Trini groans. "Z—"

"T, just... would you?"

She stares at him for a long few seconds then rolls her eyes. "I— maybe? But I'd just as well snog Sandra Bullock if she wanted to—"

"Wouldn't we all," Zack mutters, smiling softly. He puts his hand on hers and squeezes. "I'm not trying to push you into something you aren't feeling. I just reckon it can't hurt to talk things out, right? And if you don't think of Kim like that, or you aren't even ready to consider anyone in that way, then that's cool. Timing from person-to-person with this stuff varies a whole lot."

Trini nods, knowing he's right. Appreciating his understanding more than she could ever say.

She stares at a spot on the floor, trying to determine what she wants to tell him. "I just... I want to be her friend," she says quietly, like she's admitting a secret. "And I'm not sure if that's a me thing—like you said, where I'm just not ready for a romantic relationship—or if it's because of something else. But I swear that when I think about Kim and I in the future, all that sticks out to me is that I want to be _near_ her."

And as Trini says it, she's hit with the truth of the statement. It shakes her a little, just how much she wants Kim to be part of her life. She pauses again, trying to phrase. "I'd be so honoured to be someone she trusts. Ever since I met her I've wanted to know her better, you know? And all that fancying stuff is... only just starting to come up on my radar recently. I reckon that might be the problem, actually."

"It's not a problem," Zack says kindly.

"Just confusing, then, I guess," Trini mutters, running a hand through her hair. "Because she's the first person I've ever met who I've had that... pull to be near to, and you're right — it _is_ different than friendship."

She pauses again, shaking her head. "But I've never done this. A passing crush is one thing—me seeing Sandra Bullock in _Speed_ over the summer and my jaw dropping is different. With Kim it's like... she's real and she's here and she interests me more than anyone I've ever known."

Trini smiles a little. "I'd be so happy to just be her friend. Maybe I'll want more one day. But right now, there's no other motive."

Zack inclines his head. "That's cool, T."

"So no, I won't be kissing anyone because it's Sagittarius season."

He laughs. "Give it time. There's always Taurus season."

Trini turns her attention back to her schoolwork. "I'm not even gonna ask."

"Brill, I'll tell you anyway — that shit's ruled by Venus. Literal love planet." 

"Is that why you're so mushy all the time?" she mutters, still addressing her textbook. "Mister Taurus?"

Zack lights up, putting a hand on his chest dramatically. "You know my sign? Crazy Girl, you _care_?"

"Being aware that your sign's a bull is more of a safety precaution, for my sake."

"Whatever you say. I know the truth now."

.

Billy joins the two of them a couple hours later, plopping down into the chair next to Trini with a small huff.

"Alright, B?" Trini greets, smiling at him.

He nods by way of reply, taking his books out of his bag and yawning behind his hand. There's an intricate plush felt brooch fastened to his red hoodie that she's never seen him wear—a light brown smiling moose with a shock of short brown hair and four level antler prongs on either side of its head. Both the hair and one of its peripheral antler tips are glowing with a soft yellow light, no doubt enchanted, and the antlers themselves seem to be oddly shaped. 

"Hoose," Billy announces, pointing to it when he notices her staring. He turns slightly in his seat, puffing his chest out to give her a better look.

As Trini continues to peer at it curiously, Zack chuckles and mutters, "Lovely name, that."

Billy inclines his head with a soft smile.

"Not too verbal today?" Trini asks quietly, and Billy nods again. "Okay. If you wanna write us then go for it. Poke me with your quill."

"Same," Zack says, humming. "Or... chuck something. Either way."

Billy's smile gets wider, reaching into his hoodie kangaroo pocket and pulling out his tiny reporter's notebook, which he promptly opens up to show one word written on an otherwise blank page near the front: 'Thanks'.

"Got you," Trini mutters, settling in again to resume her Astronomy reading.

.

Ten minutes later, Trini gasps softly at a realisation and looks up at Billy, who's deeply absorbed in his own textbook. Considering for a couple moments, she shoves Zack lightly. 

He turns around to look back at her, questioning.

"Hoose!" Trini exclaims softly, smiling like an idiot. "Hanukkah Moose. I'm so thick, my god."

Zack grins and makes a show of glancing at the clock on the wall nearby. "That took awhile."

"Might need another coffee."

"Want me to go?"

Trini shakes her head. "I can. Will bring a pot back."

Zack hums. "Okay. You still have that last doughnut?"

Reaching into her rucksack, she pulls the brown paper bag out. As she pushes it into his hands he whispers a quiet word of thanks.

Trini gets to her feet and stretches lavishly. "Don't let the others take my seat if they show up," she says, and Zack gives her a little salute as she shoulders her rucksack. "I'll grab more food too."

With quiet steps, Trini begins to make her way out into the main part of the library, passing by students in various states of studying mode: sitting in weird ways on chairs, half-asleep on desks, heads buried in books. 

She takes a deep breath in and out as she walks, happy to be up and moving. The stacks tower around her like something comforting, enclosing against the cavernous cathedral-like ceiling, and she watches a flock of memos fly through the air high up above as she closes the last twenty feet or so of the space.

Turning out into the deserted corridor, she's walking for all of a minute when a large tapestry twitches on one of the walls up ahead; soon revealing Kim, who steps out from behind it and turns in her direction.

Kim sees her at once, offering a goofy little wave. "You're not done already...?" she calls, pulling a disbelieving face.

Trini shakes her head, striding up and swerving around her playfully at the last moment. She spins and starts to walk backwards as she says, "Getting some food. Wanna come?"

"Obviously," Kim replies, grinning. With a jerk of her head, Trini resumes walking away from the library and Kim falls into step beside her, bopping their shoulders together.

"How's your morning?" Trini asks.

Kim shrugs. "Decent. Clearly in no hurry to hit the books. Yours?"

"I miss Quidditch."

"Yo, same." Kim runs her hand through her hair absentmindedly, humming to herself. "We gotta get out there as soon as the weather lets up."

Trini makes a frustrated noise. "The boys're babies. A little hail never hurt nobody."

Kim throws a silly look at her. "Okay," she deadpans. "You do you. I'm too pretty for that rubbish."

"Are you now?" Trini quips, unsure of how to reply otherwise.

"Do _you_ think I could live my best life with some giant scar on my face?" Kim says, voice grave but eyes twinkling.

"From... a bit of hail," Trini mutters drily, quirking an eyebrow. "Right."

Kim chuckles, shrugs.

"I'm sure you could make it work, let's be real," Trini says then, pretending to think. "Might up your intimidation potential."

"I can be plenty intimidating already, thanks."

"Sure you can."

"Pray you never see it."

"Eh, not really the praying type," Trini chimes, grinning. "Though... I probably should be. Might help with finals."

"Do you think the gods give extra credit to people who pray 'round exams?" Kim muses, voice still light. They turn onto the Grand Staircase, which is littered with a few groups of students here and there. "Like, as points for trying?"

"I... dunno," Trini says, tilting her head and pushing her hands into the pockets of her grey joggers. "Would you?"

Kim peers at her curiously. "If I was a god?"

"Sure."

" _Hell_ yes," Kim answers, grinning.

Trini sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. "You aren't nearly as funny as you think you are."

Kim gasps. "Blasphemy. What a thing to say!"

"It's the truth."

"I'm gonna write the Vatican. The nerve of you is astounding."

Trini scoffs. "Witch posts a letter by magical owl to the Vatican. Okay. Ten quid they'll have you on a stake within the week."

"I'm quite important over there," Kim murmurs, snapping her fingers with a flourish. A flame appears, hovering gently in the air, and Trini has to stop herself from rolling her eyes well onto the spiritual plane itself. "Actually, I could just pop by and get our food from them instead?" She flashes a stupid smile. "The catering is _divine_."

"Please stop," Trini mutters, failing to keep her own smile at bay.

Kim makes a victorious noise at the sight, likely louder than she intended, because it seems to echo off the walls of the Grand Staircase. As they pass a painting the occupant peers at them curiously, though wearing a kind smile, and Trini mouths, "Sorry."

"You _do_ think I'm funny," Kim chimes, grinning like an idiot.

"It's a nervous tick," Trini deadpans. "Only occurs in the company of lunatics."

Kim's face brightens, clearly pleased. "Yo, would you send a testimonial to our dear old pope for me? He'll eat that shit up."

Trini glares. "Lunacy?"

"Oh, absolutely," Kim says seriously. "No faster way to sainthood."

There's a pause where Trini narrows her eyes. "Tell me, did you drop the 'god' title somewhere on that last flight of stairs?" she asks coolly. "Or were you demoted in the last couple minutes for trying to tempt me into _committing actual murder..._?"

Kim bites her lip in an admirable effort to keep from laughing. She opens her mouth then closes it, and Trini waits, eyebrow quirked. 

"Er," Kim starts. "Okay. So I _might_ have got my ranks mixed up, here—"

Trini stops abruptly on a landing and full-out reaches over to put a finger over Kim's lips.

Kim's eyes go wide with mirth, but she shuts up.

"Listen here, _angel._ This's a perfect moment to drop it," Trini says lowly, trying to sound serious even as a huge grin breaks across her face. "Please."

Another brief pause. And Trini's not sure what exactly does it, but Kim seems to lose her nerve all at once; she kind of splutters, and as Trini pulls her hand back and gestures for her to keep walking, she obeys without another word.

When Trini chances a look over, though, Kim's wearing a soft smile.

.

"There's gotta be somewhere..." Trini mutters, walking along a dungeon corridor on Tuesday, three stories down from the main floor of the castle. Inexplicably feeling like she needs to keep her voice down; she never ventures into the dungeons except for Potions classes, all of which have been only one level down in all the years she's been at Hogwarts.

Jason hums, speaking quietly as well, "There will be. Huge variation in room sizes down here."

Zack sticks his head through the next door on the right, holding his lit wand up to try and see inside. "Classroom," he reports, then steps out and closes the door. Jason does the same on the other side, huffing a bit at finding another space too small.

They're set on finding somewhere to jog, given it's recently become much too cold out in the grounds to be using the Quidditch pitch as a running track. Trini and Zack have kept up their regular routine of Tuesday's after lunch being their designated workout time up until now, with Jason joining in mid-October; and it's certainly doable on sunny days in the winter, but the weather this past week has been windy and sleeting. Not the best setting for a comfortable run, and none of them are looking to break their neck or turn their ankle on the ice that covers the pitch, either.

According to Jason, there are hundreds of individual dungeons down here. By his guess, there should be a place for them to use as an indoor track until the spring.

They come to the end of the green-lit corridor and Trini turns towards the final threshold to find a large door recessed a bit into the wall. Zack and Jason hang the left turn to continue along the hallway adjacent, with Zack whistling ['Listen to the Music'](https://open.spotify.com/track/7Ar4G7Ci11gpt6sfH9Cgz5?si=RxzWd3noTpG7S6kKvGX1bg) by the Doobie Brothers softly.

Trini pushes the ancient door open with an audible _creak_ , holding her lit wand up to peer inside, squinting. It's a high-ceiling, large space, and she waves her wand to ignite the lamps and torches in the brackets along the walls, surprised when two large, cobweb-covered chandeliers light up as well.

"Hold up lads," she calls, turning to jerk her head at them.

She walks in slowly, the chilly, cavernous room empty save for what looks like a rough wood crate in the corner and some kind of fixture in the middle of the back wall.

"Whoa," Zack mutters, coming in with Jason as Trini walks further inside. "This can work."

Trini continues, reaching the back and holding her wand up high in the air to try and get a better look. It's an old plywood board tacked to the wall, ten feet up, with what looks like a metal hoop fastened there. A smattering of small rusted chains hang from it, and Zack makes a little whooping happy noise as him and Jason come up to stand on either side of her.

"Yo!" he exclaims, a surprised laugh escaping his chest. "T, it's a ball hoop!"

Trini's eyebrows shoot up. "God, you're right."

Jason frowns up at it. "Like... basketball? In a wizarding school?"

"Quidditch isn't everyone's thing, I guess," Zack mutters, now making his way over to the open wood crate that sits in the back corner. He peers inside and cheers, bending at the waist to bring something out.

And when Trini sees it—an old deflated basketball—she laughs lightly, pleased. "You've gotta be kidding."

Zack tosses it up and down in the air, testing it a bit. She's about to warn him about it being worn out enough to explode with over-inflation when he pokes his wand at it, muttering. After a moment, it inflates, and he moves his wand to hold it between his teeth as he presses on the ball again and dribbles experimentally.

Jason jogs backwards towards the hoop, holding up an easy hand for a pass. "Oh, we _have_ to play now."

Trini looks at him with a raised eyebrow, grabbing the ball from Zack and dribbling over. " _Can_ you play, pure-blood boy?"

She tosses it to Jason lightly and he catches it, passing it behind his back and shooting at the hoop. It goes in with a _swish_ of the chains, and he jogs over to grab it before passing back to her. Trini catches it, surprised, and gives him a little nod.

"Muggle school?" she asks, shooting and following the arc of the ball by hanging her wrist in the air. It falls with another _swish_ , and she grins.

"Yeah," Jason answers, grabbing the ball and passing to Zack. "Was mates with some blokes back in the day who used to hang out a lot at the park near mine. Played either this or footy every day. You should see Tommy—she's got a mean box-out on her."

"How about Kim?" Zack asks, dribbling around experimentally.

Jason nods. "Best point-guard on the court. Every kid in the ends was in love with her."

"Translated well into Chaser stuff, I suppose," Trini mutters, catching a pass from Zack and taking it in for a lay-up.

They play for forty-five minutes or so, pulling silly shots, horsing around and laughing, getting most of their planned workout in before finishing up by jogging laps around the huge dungeon. It's maybe a quarter length of the Quidditch pitch, but it serves just fine, the chandeliers above illuminating the whole place well enough as they circle around, shoulder-to-shoulder.

"This was a good idea, Jay," Zack says, breathing heavily as they finish their cool-down lap and shuffle over to their kit duffel bags in the corner.

Jason picks up his water bottle and smiles. "Glad we found one. Knew we would eventually, but that hoop is a pleasant surprise."

Trini nods. "I mean, I'll still take Quidditch any day of the week, but for a workout it's perfect."

They shoulder their bags, steps heavier as they make their way out. As they leave, Zack waves his wand to extinguish the lights, and they step back into the green glow of the dungeon corridor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'human name' by favela (feat emily nance).
> 
> RE jason, 'the ends' is just slang for 'neighbourhood'.
> 
> \---
> 
> HEY! a light little chapter this time, so quicker update. hope you enjoyed it!
> 
> first up! we have zack and trini having a good heart to heart, which I always adore. trini's... sorting out her kim feelings. very, very slowly. NO RUSH U KNO! and don't get mad at zack for poking a bit. he just wants what's best for trini, and he can tell that there's _something_ going on. he will certainly open up to her in time, too. and has already. but we'll get more in depth with his character textually as the story progresses.
> 
> also! our billy is jewish! he doesn't keep kosher on the reg but you will find him celebrating holidays and things—when he's home, him and his mum go to synagogue. he's jewish on his dad's side, and his mum isn't practising, per se, but their family certainly takes part in some of the traditions. billy has a menora in his dorm room, as well.
> 
> I fully got the hanukkah moose bit from a plush toy I saw once! I believe there's also a semi-recent childrens book about a hanukkah moose...? but yes, billy's is a brooch, and he's had it for forever—his parents got it for him when his dad was still alive—and wears it as a way to be festive. it can be used to keep a cloak closed, or can be fastened to clothing generally! 
> 
> if you didnt guess by the description HOOSE is a menora of sorts, and is enchanted so each of his little antler 'candles' can light up individually, with his super tall hair glowing as the shamash in this case. good times.
> 
> now! trini and kim! what actual idiots, eh? their conversations can get a bit ??? just because... it's kim. she's all over the place, especially when she's talking to trini. and they're still getting to know each other, so the banter is something that will continue to develop over time. 
> 
> catch that bit where trini called kim 'angel' ?????? DID YA? CAUSE I FUCKING DID??!?!?!? TRINI WHAT ARE YOU DOING BRO?! sure it was in the context of... their discussion. but. TRINI MAN IDK IDK IDK.
> 
> kim certainly caught it too. lord help her indeed.
> 
> also, to any of you folks who are religious — trust, kim and trini are very respectful kids when it comes to that stuff. kim's comment on lunacy and sainthood was in reference to like, how miracles are basically magic in this universe? WITH ADDED context in regards to how magic and witchcraft is often muddled up and conflated with madness and... yeah? it's quite an interesting and history-savvy comment and I'm proud of her. you'll see where she gets this type of commentary from when her mum talks about that kind of stuff in... the summer between years 6 and 7.
> 
> so yes! keep that in mind. dont hate her pls.
> 
> what else? billy will be nonverbal/partially verbal sometimes because that's a thing with him. this time, it's mainly due to studying exhaustion, but there won't always be a 'trigger'. that's just how he is sometimes. he's trying his best! 
> 
> and trini jason and zack playing basketball in a dungeon is very... them. trini calling jason 'pure blood' isnt... quite accurate but she says it as a quip, and will be known to call kim that here and there even though it isn't quite accurate in her case either. youll find out more about jasons parents and stuff DOWN THE LINEEEEEEE.
> 
> I think that's nearly it! the inclement weather is taken right out of HP canon for their present place in the timeline. sleet and stuff! yikes! though trini would... apparently be willing to play quidditch in any conditions (same with kim, if it was a regulation IHC game), staying inside for a bit is reasonable here.
> 
> ALSO HAVE YOU LOT _SEEN_ SANDRA BULLOCK IN SPEED?!?!? THE FILM??? trini's comment is very, very on point. just wanted to note. (and it also stars the internets darling immortal Good Boy, keanu reeves, if you were looking for another reason to watch. bi peeps, I GOT u.)
> 
> \---
> 
> next chapter is entirely a trini/kim interaction. they do their little listening picnic with the album kim asked trini to borrow a couple updates ago. it's VERY soft and I'd ask you all to prepare yourselves.
> 
> happy final day of hanukkah, friends! and happy holidays generally!
> 
> <3 THANKS AS ALWAYS FOR READING! HAVE A NICE DAY/NIGHT AND I APPRECIATE YOU ALL TO JUPITER AND BACK!


	32. Re: Stacks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/2LthqyP0MLhGUBICwR1535?si=QdyKJILjRYCeAydglc0bFw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Curious, what was the first album you listened to on this?" Trini asks, watching Kim unbuckle her dark green _HMV 102_ gramophone case and open it up carefully atop the large blanket they're sat on.

The two of them have parked themselves in the grassy Quidditch stadium tunnel that houses the Hufflepuff and Gryffindor changerooms in order to shelter themselves from the swirling December snow, which is a pleasant change from the windy sleet that's been the norm for the past week or so. They both wanted to be outside as a result, but with limited options, this is where they ended up.

It happens to be where they first met, which is kind of cool. And the acoustics in here are _fantastic_ , no less.

They've brought supper in the form of breakfast foods acquired from the kitchens: coffee, bagels, jam, and some fruit. And given it's completely dark out and snowing (with the winter sun setting at around four o'clock now most days) they've made a nest of multiple blankets to keep extra warm, and have put charms up to keep the space they're situated in better insulated.

Trini's done the best she can with the heavy soup bowl she stole from the Great Hall, too, which now houses crackling blue flames—completely non-destructive but providing a hearty amount of heat nonetheless. And between the blue flickering flames and Kim's antique gas lamp, they're thrown into a kind of hybrid light—both warm and cold—which illuminates their faces just enough so that they can see each other clearly, but not much else.

"First one I played on it? Ever? [_Siamese Dream_](https://open.spotify.com/album/0bQglEvsHphrS19FGODEGo?si=JhH3Q9YlQnyetwjOdpPuCw) by The Smashing Pumpkins," Kim answers, smiling as she sets her gramophone up, then takes a bite of her apple.

"And..." she continues, "the first _new_ one I listened to on it was the Nine Inch Nails [record](https://open.spotify.com/album/3nJnyDV8fwFpffo0EyHQto?si=8NqEPp6fS2OWL_SdfmPexw) that came out earlier this year." She scrunches up her forehead a little, looking like she's recalling the memory. "It was... something."

Trini hums, considering as she sips at her coffee with the added _Bailey's Irish Cream_ , which gives it a pleasant, warm smoothness. "I haven't tried listening to that one yet—the Nine Inch Nails album. I know everyone lauded it, but it _really_ doesn't seem like my cup of tea."

Kim nods. "Honestly, it wasn't mine either. When I first listened I thought it was absolute rubbish. Couldn't figure out why the reviews were so good. It just seemed like..." she trails off, gesturing vaguely.

"Noise?" Trini tries, and Kim nods in agreement.

"Yeah. And there're plenty of times where I don't agree with the industry people on what's good and what isn't — I wasn't necessarily determined to like it." Kim pauses, and a little smile starts pulling at the corner of her mouth. "But after I listened to it once I couldn't shake the feeling that there was something I was _missing_. So I listened to it again. Then again."

Kim shakes her head a little. "In the process I realised that I had what seemed to be some kind of Puritan-aligned grandmother living in my brain, so I made an effort to shut her up." Trini pulls a confused face and Kim smiles as she explains, "Given the vulgarity and unnerving feeling of the whole thing, the entire album was just... hitting a wall in my mind, I reckon? Which prevented me from really _hearing_ it."

Trini nods. "Gotcha." She pauses. "That's really cool you recognised that in yourself though."

Kim shrugs. "The album didn't change my life or anything. And it won't ever be on a list of favourites for me." She hesitates, and her voice gets quieter, "But I can understand why it _would_ be, for someone else. It's so different from anything I've ever heard? So much alive and visceral to the point of it seeming obscene. But there's a realisation once you hear it a few times that, like... _that's_ how it would probably sound if a person's brain in their darkest, most terrifying moments was plugged into to a set of speakers." She pauses, hesitating again, eyes glazed over like she's lost in her head somewhere. "I figure it's kind of transcendent, really."

She stops talking for a few seconds, then shakes her head slightly and meets Trini's eyes. "Two songs on there I want you to hear one day. Individually, they're on my favourites of all time list." Another pause, and she grins. "Which really isn't saying much, given it's quite long."

Trini smiles, watching Kim with a warm but puzzled expression. She's never heard her talk like this, and it's causing her brain to stall a little with the influx of new information. "I'm curious about your music taste — you know how you asked me before what I'd listened to recently? Same question."

Kim furrows her brow, tipping her head a little. "Sonic Youth, Portishead," she starts slowly. "Nirvana, Green Day, Massive Attack..." she trails off, frowning. "My memory's shit... er, Pearl Jam, Dinosaur Jr., Pixies..."

Trini blinks back at her, tipping her head to rest up against the cold wall of the tunnel. "Okay, admittedly? I'm kind of floored."

Kim chuckles, throws a questioning look at her. "Why?"

"I'm not sure," Trini says honestly. "Not that I was expecting anything in particular... I just—" she pauses, frowning. "I wasn't expecting anything, but I wasn't expecting that either."

"Which part?"

"All of it."

Kim smiles, shrugs. "Honestly? I didn't even have a gramophone at school for the first two years I was here—" she sees Trini's eyebrows shoot up, and she chuckles a little. "You said you grew up with music on in your house all of the time, and that was me, too. My mum and dad were big on it—both've been to Reading, Knebworth, Glastonbury, all of that, over and over."

Trini smiles at this. Her dad was the same.

Well, her dad _and_ her mum.

"But after they split, my mum just... stopped playing music," Kim continues, sighing sadly. "It was the strangest thing, like she had too much attached to the songs, to the albums—as if she couldn't separate my dad from any of it."

"And that silence kind of... permeated. Bled into me, too." She stops abruptly, gesturing a bit with one hand. "Which, to give you context, was bizarre, given they got me my first turntable when I was like, six. No joke. So where before I had music playing _all_ of the time, after my dad was gone I just... didn't. And then I came here to Hogwarts and I didn't even think to bring any of it with me at all."

Kim frowns, looking like she's disappointed with herself. "In hindsight, it _really_ should've been an indication that I was sliding much further from everything than I thought? Because music just... disappeared from my life. Faded away into a silence that was _so_ loud." She pauses, swallowing thickly. "But I wasn't listening, of course. It didn't really hit me until I started to come back to myself again — the start of the summer between second and third year."

Trini watches her, sees the mess of emotions flickering over her face. 

"The morning after I got back home from Hogwarts I went straight to my dad's, intent on confronting him." Kim presses her lips together in a sad kind of smile, staring at her mug of coffee. "Mum was scheduled to be at work until around suppertime, so I came back to the house straight after, kind of in shock if I'm honest—like, I'd just cut my dad out of my life completely after planning on doing it for _months_? And I can't explain why, but I walked over to my record shelf and picked one up."

She looks at Trini and seems to read the unasked question on her face. "[ _Physical Graffiti_](https://open.spotify.com/track/2LthqyP0MLhGUBICwR1535?si=QdyKJILjRYCeAydglc0bFw) by Led Zeppelin. No real conscious choice. And... I couldn't bring myself to use my old turntable, 'cause my parents both signed it when they gave it to me. It hurt to look at it, even. So I packed it up and put it in a box in my bedroom cupboard. Brought the Zeppelin album down to the living room and put it on."

Kim blinks, shakes her head. "And I swear, it was the strangest thing. Because I decide to play music for the first time in forever, laying on the floor of our living room with the volume up so loud that it may very well have been shaking the walls of my house—it _felt_ like it was—and my mum just so happens to come home earlier than she was supposed to."

She pauses, eyes looking far away, somewhere else. "She comes walking in, kind of just stares at me—because remember, I'd been a prat to her for... two and a half years, it was by that point." Her voice gets quieter, with both an unfathomable kind of sadness and a heartbreaking shame crossing her face, "She picked me up from the Hogwarts Express the day before and I _tried_ — I fucking tried to say something to her, to apologise for all of it... but I couldn't."

Kim shakes her head, sighing heavily. "Too much of a coward, right. There was too much to say, I didn't know where to fucking start because I'd destroyed us, destroyed her, destroyed myself. I'd planned to do this giant apology as soon as I saw her but didn't say anything; just nodded at her when she picked me up. Spent that night in silence, and she went to work the next morning before I was awake. Left a note in the kitchen telling me that she'd be home for supper."

"So I'd been laying there on the floor for like an hour straight, just listening to the Zeppelin album," Kim continues, then huffs out a bewildered breath. "And I remember _so_ clearly that ['Ten Years Gone'](https://open.spotify.com/track/1NV6sCADgcLSW7DG7zSWlq?si=lXxU79p6SHaQqjYyrKt8LQ) was playing at the moment I heard her come through the front door."

Another huff, eyebrows shooting up then falling in a disbelieving kind of twitch. "I thought she wouldn't be home for hours!" she exclaims weakly, lost in the memory. "I'd planned to have it all shut off way before she got back, to stick to whatever kind of unspoken moratorium on music we had going on out of respect for her..." Kim shakes her head again, eyes widening a little. "But she just... walks in! And I'm not sure how well you know that particular song—"

"I know it well," Trini says quietly.

Kim nods. "Okay. It's that [bit](https://youtu.be/DBzuYNK95sM?t=199) in the middle— the... second? verse maybe, where Robert Plant just _loses_ it — you know?" Trini nods again, feeling pain pulling at _her_ features now, mirroring everything that's appearing, growing, twisting, disappearing on Kim's face from second to second. "My mum walks in right before that part starts. And she kind of stopped as she enters the living room. Just stared at me. Because I know for a fact that she hadn't played _any_ music at all in the house between that moment and when my dad left — she told me later, but I suspected it then."

"And there I am laying on the carpet in our living room, still in shock after what had just happened with my dad, and this song is just like, _shaking_ the walls, the ceiling, the floor." Kim pauses, gripping her forearm with her hand tightly. "She comes in and sees me, then she's looking at me like I'm this... wounded animal who could snap, bite, attack at any moment. It was such a defeated _sadness_ that I could swear I felt my heart break."

Kim's jaw tightens. "I realised I'd been crying, not sure for how long, and I got up, with the song thundering around us, and I just... closed the space between us and hugged her. For the first time in two and a half _years_ , Trin."

She pauses, voice trembling, trying to compose herself. "She sort of froze, so surprised at me touching her that she was legitimately stunned. And then she lets out this sob that I—" her voice breaks, "will _never_ forget the sound of until the day I die. Drops her bag, her cloak, and hugs me tighter than she ever had. Starts to cry, too. Pulls me into her like she's trying to meld our bodies together, clutching at my jumper with this kind of desperation that I'd never felt from her in my life."

Kim's gaze is far away now, voice softer, though getting the warmth back, "We ended up on the floor, me in her arms, collapsed but holding each other up. Stayed like that all through the song and I'm not sure how many others, just crying for everything that'd happened. That was the first day we started to fix all of it; the day music finally came back to me again."

There's a long pause after she stops talking, and Trini waits. Realises there are tears pooling her own eyes.

After a few more moments Kim shakes her head, seeming to come out of a daze. Looks up, straight into Trini's eyes. "Big tangent, I know. But what I'm saying with that story is that it was music that really started to bring me back to myself. So, yeah—those artists I listed are angsty as all hell, and sad, and depressing much of the time—" Kim's smiling a little now, genuinely, through unshed tears of her own, "but that's what I could relate to. It's what helped pull me out of that hole I'd dug myself into—knowing that I wasn't alone, that there were other people who had fucked up as bad as I did, who felt just as sad, just as lost, just as hopeless."

She shrugs, smile growing. "So that's what I listen to most these days, because my music taste—at least as I've gotten older—has formed and shaped around shit like that. A bit more of an evolution than anything, because my parents really influenced me there too, which why I said before that you and I probably overlap a lot more than you'd think."

Trini nods, feeling like she understands so much more, now. "Kim, thank you for telling me all of that. Truly." She pauses. "You know I wasn't harping on you though, right? Those're all great bands... just unexpected."

Kim waves her off lightly. "I know, Trin." She continues to look at Trini for a moment before taking a deep, settling breath in and out. Gestures at her fancy gramophone. "Alright — so what do you wanna hear?"

Trini grins. "Well, given you wanted to borrow this, and we both like the Hip, and _nobody_ I know but my dad likes them..." she starts, rambling a little as she pulls The Tragically Hip's [_Day For Night_](https://open.spotify.com/album/3qtWDY2yl7NGrpCYqxrUt6?si=sl-5wkHSRrKKf0fL0_HLjA)—their newest release, the one Kim hasn't heard yet—out of the sleeve in the lid of her own gramophone with a flourish. "Thought we could do this?"

Kim _beams_ at her. "Is that it, then?!" Trini nods back, handing her the record, which Kim takes eagerly, though she holds it like it's made of glass. "Yes, yes, yes."

"You sure? 'Cause I brought the rest of my records with me if not—"

"Trin, give it here please," Kim interjects, still smiling.

Trini huffs, smiling back, and hands it over. Kim takes it gently and removes the sleeve, setting the record up on her gramophone. She's about to drop the needle when she pauses, stares at it for a moment, and instead waves her hand to float one of the blankets across the width of the tunnel, where it spreads out neatly on the cool dry grass up against the wall. Kim pops to her feet and waves her hand again, bringing her gramophone floating over with her carefully, then squats down once it's in place on the blanket, setting it up proper but not starting it quite yet.

She nods to herself and strides the twenty feet or so back to Trini, where she sits back down in their pile of blankets and brings her coffee to her lips, her eyebrows shooting up as she takes her first sip. "Wow, this is _good_. It's whisky, you say?" she mutters, appreciative.

Trini nods. "I can't believe you hadn't tried _Baileys_ before."

Kim shrugs, taking another hearty gulp and smiling contentedly. "As I get older I'm starting to realise just how much the wizarding world is missing, omitting all of this muggle stuff." She pauses then grabs the bottle from where it's laid near the food, examining it before screwing the cap off and pouring more into her cup happily.

"It's barely alcoholic — maybe... double the proof of beer or so," Trini says slowly, then turns, sticking her hand into her rucksack. "Which is why I brought this, too." She takes a thermos out, a tub of whipped cream, and a pint-sized unmarked glass bottle of dark brown liqueur, smiling mischievously at Kim.

And Kim, to her credit, looks a tad bit apprehensive. "Okay... is that home-made alcohol?"

Trini nods, bringing two more mugs out of her bag. "My abuelo used to make it. We still have... gallons in our basement, which, for this stuff is plenty. Should last a long while."

Kim peers at her curiously. "Given that you have two mugs there, I'm guessing I'm to try it?"

Trini shrugs. "You don't have to by any means. I'm fine having two mugs to myself," she says, grinning. Not wanting to pressure, certainly.

That earns her a chuckle from Kim. "Oh no, I definitely want to." She smirks back at Trini. "I'll try everything once... with some exceptions, of course."

Trini's turn to laugh, now. She nods, then takes the little pint bottle in her hands. "You can do stuff with a bit of a kick, right?"

Kim scoffs, feigning offense. "Merlin, I can hear my ancestors _yelling_ at me from whatever plane they're on—" she wags her finger like she's chastising, pulling out a thick Indian accent, "'for shame, for shame.'"

"I didn't mean it as an insult!"

"The fact that you even had to _ask_ , though."

Trini fixes her with an unimpressed look before she drains the last of her coffee and gets to work preparing their drinks—unscrewing the cap on her thermos and pouring rich hot chocolate into each mug, then a liberal amount of the alcohol. She swirls each of them around for a moment before adding a few dollops of whipped cream.

"Quite an elaborate thing to bring to a listening picnic," Kim teases, watching Trini with warm eyes.

"I know, right? I'm great. And in the middle of flurries, no less," Trini chirps, gesturing lazily to the snow swirling past the mouth of the tunnel. She finishes the drinks and hands Kim hers, steam rising up in swirls like sweet smoke. Kim brings it up to her face curiously, smelling it.

"Explanation," Trini starts, raising her own mug a little, "it's a liqueur made from hot chile peppers and dried fruit, mainly. There's more stuff in there but it's not important. It'll be spicy and sweet at the same time."

"Sounds good," Kim says easily, and the two of them clink their mugs together in a cheers before each taking a hesitant sip, not wanting to burn their tongues. Trini watches her carefully, curious if she'll like it.

And she's not disappointed—as soon as Kim tastes it, she makes a noise of high praise, muttering, "Trin, that is _unholy_ ," with her eyes rolling back a little.

Trini can't help but smile wide. "Yeah?"

Kim hums. "If I didn't like it I'd just say so—nicely—you know me," she says sincerely, smiling back at Trini for a few moments. "And in the interest of being reciprocal—" she waves her hand at her gramophone across the tunnel to start the album up, and ['Grace, Too'](https://open.spotify.com/track/0qC02cAOQmm4eJR4Kn9pcY?si=XdDu4PZKS2Kg5vVobFmvaw) starts to play.

Trini raises an eyebrow. "Reciprocal?"

Kim nods, something flashing in her eyes for a moment then vanishing before she responds, "Yeah. Like, I've just experienced this—" she raises her mug, "so it's only fair that you get to have your world rocked like I did."

Trini's stomach flips over at her phrasing, and she could swear she sees a slight blush on Kim's cheeks in the low light.

But they're drinking something spicy... that's to be expected. So Trini nods, working at keeping herself composed, and scoots over to rest her back up against the cool wall of the tunnel again, patting the space beside her.

Kim smiles and comes to sit right up against her, shoulder-to-shoulder, and takes another hearty gulp of her hot chocolate. "Man, I know this's supposed to be sipped, but it's _so_ good."

And tipping her head to look at Kim properly, sincerity is all Trini sees. "Your wording from before is funny—calling this stuff 'unholy,'" she says quietly, smiling to herself. "My abuela used to have a little mug of this after evening mass sometimes, and every time she came home wanting it, she'd throw her hands up and announce—" she pauses, humming and furrowing her brow a little. "Er, in English it's something like, 'Post-Mass Hell Drink.'"

Kim laughs, and properly.

"She only went to church here and there," Trini continues, smiling too, "but it was the funniest thing. And whenever her and my dad let me have a sip of theirs they'd be making jokes about tongues of fire—which is a Bible reference—the whole time."

"I love your abuela," Kim murmurs, then lurches to grab the thermos, bottle of liqueur, and whipped cream. She starts preparing another mug for herself and tops up Trini's as well.

"I think she would've been a fan of yours," Trini says quietly. Kim looks up at her, face suddenly softening, clearly deeply flattered. "Especially if you'd called this stuff 'unholy' in front of her. She would've asked you to move in right then and there."

Kim blinks, still taken aback at the compliment, then recovers. "Smart lady."

"She was."

They fall into an easy silence with the music filling up the tunnel around them, and Trini tips her head back to rest on the wall, closing her eyes.

A couple minutes go by and Kim's voice sounds from next to her, quiet, "So what do you think about the gramophone?"

"I think it sounds _incredible_. Like the album so far?"

She can hear the smile in Kim's voice when she replies, "I'd imagine my opinion is being informed both by the alcohol and by you being here, but I think it's perfect. Thank you for listening to it with me."

Trini opens her mouth then closes it. Pauses for a beat. "If you ever repeat this I'll have to kill you," she says, voice low and teasing before it changes to something different, more sincere. "But honestly? There's nowhere in the world I'd rather be right now."

"Me too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 're: stacks' by bon iver.
> 
> \---
> 
> hello everyone! a soft trimberly chapter for you today! quite a good amount of dialogue, but we're getting into some proper lifechats now. I'd say sorry for all the music references but that was the nature of their discussion. part of the HISTORY! & if you're curious, the two songs kim wants trini to hear on the NIN album are 'a warm place' and 'hurt'. 
> 
> I put a little link to the exact spot kim talks about in 'ten years gone' as well, where maddy comes into the house and finds her there. it's quite a moment, if you have the song playing loudly in your mind (or externally) as you picture it. like... just _thundering_ through the house. SIGH!
> 
> but yeah. we get a bit more of an idea of how everything went down with kim and her mum. it hasn't been an easy road, but they're closer now than they've ever been. we also get a bit of a glimpse into trini's home life before her abuela died, who, remember, lived with her forever. both her grandparents lived in the basement of their house! there's a little suite down there, along with storage space and such.
> 
> NOW! kim's music taste is... rooted in grunge, first off and most importantly. also has rock all over the damn place—including indie, alternative, punk, noise, and experimental, among others. she's MUCH more classic rock influenced than trini, as well. she'll go all over the place, from hip-hop to trip hop and into a tiny bit of new wave. but yeah! there's more and that's only scratching the surface. it by no means covers her tastes entirely, but there's the basis. I have... so many playlists devoted to exactly this, for each of the kids.
> 
> fun fic fact: in april of this school year, youre gonna get a more concrete glimpse into both of our girls (and the boys') music tastes! via mixtapes! I'll release the spotify links once we're there in the story. not sure if any of you are interested but!!!
> 
> what else? hmm. that smashing pumpkins album 'siamese dream' has been referenced before in the story already, when kim was listening to it on one of her swims out at the lake. you'll see her swimming throughout the story, but she goes out at least once a week and has been for some time. didn't want to get TOO repetitive by showing you all the time, and that goes for trini's yoga and the pick-up quidditch matches too, obviously. there's so much to show!
> 
> incidentally, as we continue along in the story there'll start to be bigger gaps between each chapter in terms of in-universe time passing. JKR will have points where she just... skips right over multiple months at once sometimes. and it won't be to that extent at all, but since we're still at the beginning of this (reminder, it goes all the way through their time at hogwarts!) we need to show their relationships as they build and grow. to me, it'd feel too quick otherwise, you know? especially for a slowburn of THIS MAGNITUDE.
> 
> the little inclusion of kim doing a thick indian accent there is a nod to how naomi brings it out in interviews sometimes, though very rarely.
> 
> we get a little flashback to this tunnel scene in a few in-story months, though it's not to a part I've shown here. figured that would be too repetitive. it's specifically the two of them laying on their backs on the blanket, listening to the song ['scared'](https://open.spotify.com/track/3GuGAaOn1SQbggjKDtF7C4?si=1J2fvheFRSuObqD0R2W0JQ) by the tragically hip off the mentioned album. as I've said before, that song becomes important for the two of them down the line.
> 
> also, you might've noticed the little bits of their warm/cold dichotomy coming through via the lights that each of them brings to this interaction—trini with the cold blue flames and kim with the warm yellow. IMPORTANT note: these are EXTERNAL things they're bringing, see? kim's old gas lamp is an important object that we've seen before, providing an external source of warmth and light that she herself does not conjure, if that makes sense. cause throughout the story we've some moon/sun, night/day imagery here and there, with cold/night/moon=kim and warm/day/sun=trini. them providing flames here that are the _opposite_ to what they hold within them internally is very intentional. (but it's not so simple either—they're two very layered and complicated people who are more than one thing, of course. just a note.)
> 
> \---
> 
> COOL COOL COOL! next time on glee, we have a long time coming kim/zack one on one interaction. brief appearance of the beetle devil herself, rita skeeter, and you get to see a bit more of the castle, along with some stuff I've extrapolated.
> 
> thank as always for reading, everyone. I'LL KEEP SAYING HOW MUCH I APPRECIATE THE READERSHIP, and I hope you're continuing to enjoy this thing. truly. it's such a pleasure to watch these kids go about their lives.
> 
> <3 take care, happy new year, and until next time.


	33. Learn To Be Still

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/5POu9RspR7sR9zD5m6ZZkJ?si=S8BoTMDMRiONre_TxHno7Q). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The start of the second-last week of school is dreary and dark; Monday morning finds Kim standing in the pumpkin patch outside Hagrid's cabin, shivering in the chilly air and listening to instructions on how to coax the ten remaining Blast-Ended Skrewts into crates for hibernation.

According to Hagrid, they might not even be the _type_ to hibernate. But they're all going to try to make it work, apparently.

Kim sighs.

Though she would usually spend Care of Magical Creatures with Jason at her side, she finds herself primarily accompanied by Zack instead today — Jason's been sick in bed with a nasty head cold since last night and is up in their dorm, coughing away.

And Kim can get on without him, truly—there hasn't been a head-on confrontation with her Housemates in over a month. But Zack is still sticking close to her; he didn't offer an explanation, but she surmised that it's by Jason's request.

Kim makes a mental note to grab a soup to send up with Zack after class, given Jason likely still has steam pouring out of his ears after his second dose of Madam Pomfrey's Pepperup Potion this morning.

The class begins their attempt to corral the Skrewts into boxes lined with blankets and pillows, the goal being to pen them up in there for a nice, season-long nap. Kim works with Rose—who is keeping closer to her as well, no doubt also noticing Jason's absence—and some of Zack's regular gaggle of Gryffindors, though they find themselves failing over and over thanks to the nigh impenetrable grey armour that the Skrewts have grown over the past couple months.

 _BOOM_.

Kim's ears perk up, turning her head—

"Oh dang," Zack mutters, eyes following offending Skrewt as it gallops out through a newly-singed hole in the fence and into the grounds.

Within the next five minutes small fires are burning in multiple sections of the pumpkin patch, not powerful enough to catch but wilting plenty of plants in the process. Kim peers over to Hagrid for instructions but finds him otherwise occupied with extinguishing duties, which she can't exactly blame him for.

There's another _BANG_ as two Skrewts blast a box apart at the far end of the space, setting fire to the fluffy pillow and blanket inside.

Sky looks around at the quickly escalating chaos with a raised eyebrow. Shakes her head and mutters, "Nope."

Without further ado, she grabs Rocky's hand and starts pulling him away towards the back door of Hagrid's cabin, where the majority of the class is now jogging over to take refuge. 

"Where's that famous bravery lads?" Rose calls to their backs, smirking around the toothpick in her mouth. Sky flips her off, and Mackenzie and Will look on after their fleeing classmates, clearly trying to decide what to do. Malfoy, Crabbe, and Goyle are already inside the cabin, their faces pressed against one of Hagrid's windows and fogging up the cold glass.

Another crate explodes close by and Kim starts a little, raising her wand in case the Skrewt comes closer. A few feet away, Will claps her hands over her ears and winces, scrunching her eyes shut.

Mackenzie's face changes, getting softer as she puts a hand on Will's shoulder to get her attention. " _Do you have your earplugs?_ " she asks in British Sign Language, signing a couple feet in front of Will's face.

Will shakes her head, palms still clamped over her ears, and Mackenzie jerks her head at Hagrid's cabin. She signs, " _Go get warm,_ " and moves a hand to the small of Will's back, pushing her towards it gently.

Rose jogs over to a length of rope discarded in the dirty snow and scoops it up, weighing it in her hand before starting to make her way towards one of the Skrewts at the edge of the now partially-smoldering pumpkin patch. "Hart, you gonna help me?" she yells, turning back to give Kim an imploring look.

Kim nods then turns back to Mackenzie with a curious expression. "Mack!" she calls, voice raised over yet another small explosion twenty yards away.

Mackenzie looks over, taking her eyes off of Will, who's entering Hagrid's cabin at the tail end of the group. She jerks her head in acknowledgement, long light brown hair whipping around in the wind.

" _Help us round these up, will you?_ " Kim signs, turning to follow Rose, and a pleasant look of surprise crosses Mackenzie's face.

Zack jogs up beside her as Mackenzie does, another rope in his hand, and the two of them make for a different Skrewt as Kim joins Rose at hers.

Some time later and they and a handful of other students have managed to get all but one Skrewt subdued. With all of them sporting a variety of burns, stings, and cuts, Kim and Zack are perched on an untouched part of the wood garden fence with Mackenzie and Rose leaning up against it, all watching Potter and Weasley at the other end of the pumpkin patch.

The two of them have managed to get themselves pinned up against the wall of Hagrid's cabin and are shooting sparks from their wands at the _furious_ Skrewt that's slowly advancing.

"Should we... help?" Zack asks slowly, shaking his arm out like it has pins and needles. There's an angry welt near his elbow with a dark stinger puncture in the centre, and a twin spot visible through a singed hole in the leg of his trousers.

Rose sniggers, shaking her head. "Eh, they've got it."

Kim's about to agree when Rita Skeeter—clad in the most _ridiculous_ cloak of all time, complete with a fluffy purple collar—seems to materialise out of nowhere right up against the fence next to Hagrid's cabin.

She starts to talk to Hagrid and Kim frowns. Word around the castle was that Dumbledore had banned her from the grounds.

"Didn't know there'd be giant cockroaches in Creatures today," Mackenzie mutters, eyeing Skeeter disapprovingly.

"Fire-roasted, if we're lucky," Rose quips, checking her wristwatch. "Might as well get out of here. Nearly lunch."

Kim's feeling a tad bit light-headed, and she's not sure if it's because they've been in close proximity to the massive steaming trough of single-malt whisky that sits in the Beauxbatons Abraxan paddock for the whole lesson, or if it's because of the creeping numbness that's slowly spreading up her left arm.

Admittedly, it's helping to dull the fiery-hot pain left behind from the Skrewt sting at the base of her palm. But she should probably get it checked out by Madam Pomfrey. "I'm good with that. Her outfit's already burning my eyes enough."

Zack chuckles, beginning to limp towards Hagrid's cabin. "Enough fire for one day, innit."

The four of them make their way to the back door, watching with wide eyes as Hagrid body-slams the last Skrewt to the ground.

Rose tries the door, opening it a bit before finding it blocked, and Mackenzie hops up onto a sodden wood crate underneath a nearby window to knock on it loudly. The person behind the foggy glass jumps, and Mackenzie waves a two-finger salute, gesturing for them to remove the barricade.

Zack blinks slowly, swaying a little, and Kim puts her hand on his unhurt arm, searching his eyes. "You alright?"

He nods, eyelids heavy. "Head's fuzzy."

Their classmates start to pile out of the cabin, some peeking around the edge and electing to go the long way to avoid the last Skrewt, which is now being wrangled by Hagrid with Rita Skeeter chattering along in his wake.

Kim soon finds herself experiencing a hot flash despite the chilly weather, and halfway up to the castle her vision goes spotty out of nowhere—

_Shit._

Overcome with a horrible wave of nausea, she veers off the path clumsily and drops to her knees to be sick in the snow. Sky and Rose hurry to her side, muttering words of quiet surprise.

Sky quickly spells the vomit away and Kim wipes at her mouth with her sleeve, bracing her weight on her hands and breathing heavily.

"I'd be sick if I was you, too," one of the Slytherin girls sneers, walking past.

Rose pauses her rubbing of Kim's back to turn around and bark, "AND I'D HAVE THE CLAP IF I WAS YOU! GOOD TALK!"

"Rose — It's fine," Kim murmurs, getting to her feet with their help.

"She's such a twat," Rose scoffs, as the three of them resume walking back up to the castle, now at the back of the line of students.

"I'm sorry, Kim," Sky says quietly, then sighs. "Let's get you and Zack to the hospital wing."

.

Fifteen minutes later Kim and Zack are laying in beds next to each other, both bandaged and potioned. Madam Pomfrey had gruffly shooed everyone out of the ward who didn't need to be there, so they've got the whole place to themselves.

Zack's singing under his breath, the both of them under the heavy influence of a world-tipping mixture of anti-venom and painkillers.

A dopey smile spreads across Kim's face as she listens. "What song's that?" she mutters, eyes closed. Her head feels light as air.

"Eagles," Zack replies after a moment. "['Learn To Be Still.'](https://open.spotify.com/track/5POu9RspR7sR9zD5m6ZZkJ?si=iotoEBilSt-2YXEuDDQMkw)"

Kim bobs her head side-to-side gently. "Mmm. Could be our theme song."

She can hear the smile in his voice when he replies, "Yeah, Kimbo. You an' me."

"Double trouble on'the double."

"That..." Zack mutters, trailing off and crinkling his forehead. "Wha' does that even mean?"

Kim just smiles wider, eyes still closed. "Shhhh. Sing?"

He lets out a tiny, breathy laugh. "Sing."

And he does, resuming the song in a low, gentle tone.

After singing it another few times through, Kim's nearly drifted off into a blissful sleep when he speaks again, quieter than before, "Wha' do ya think Jay's gonna say when he finds out I didn't keep y'safe?"

Kim hums, furrowing her brow. Eyes still closed. "I _am_ safe. You're here with'me."

She tips her head to look at him then, finding him staring back at her with heavy-lidded, shining eyes. Kim smiles and he returns it, reaching across the space between them with his bandaged arm. Stretching out her own patched-up hand, she runs her fingers along his gently.

.

They're released from the hospital wing an hour later, not long after Trini and Billy come by to assure them both that they're covered for Arithmancy notes. 

Kim yawns and stretches a little, hiking her bag up on her shoulder and looking around for a moment to make sure she isn't forgetting anything. Once satisfied, her and Zack leave with a written note each from Madam Pomfrey clutched in hand, excusing them from lessons for the remainder of the day. And it's likely unnecessary, given their injuries aren't serious, but they happily accepted when she offered.

They make their way slowly, mindful of Zack's limp, and Kim forgoes her regular shortcuts in favour of a route with less twists and turns for his sake. In their comfortable, easy silence, she absentmindedly hums the first verse of a [song](https://open.spotify.com/track/2JuasWPUodaUxf5nwNpciQ?si=WPI-P1pHSIWCteVD9KJvNg) she's had stuck in her head since swimming yesterday; it's one of her favourites, and she can't help but start to sing under her breath lowly as they go.

The castle is quiet around them otherwise, most everyone in lessons or at their destinations already. And they encounter a handful of scattered students about, but with how the torches are lit to compensate for the lack of daylight peeking through the dark grey clouds outside, it feels as if it could be the middle of the night.

As they reach the Grand Staircase Kim peers over the railing to see it entirely devoid of traffic—a rarity that makes it almost feel smaller from up here, like it's shrunk itself to look more inviting in its eagerness to have the weight of people upon it again. Of the one hundred forty-two staircases at Hogwarts it's certainly the one most unused to being alone for very long; the great stone walls that stretch up, up, up to the cavernous ceiling might be leaning in to greet them, even...

(Mind, that could also be the lingering effect of the potions.)

Either way.

Kim pats the bannister lightly, trying to anchor herself by listening to the soft chatter of conversation coming from some of the portraits on the wall nearby. 

Zack hesitates beside her, resting his weight on the shiny black cane Madam Pomfrey told him to use until tomorrow night. "Gonna go to your common room?" he asks, rubbing at the small of his back to get the tension out.

"Wasn't planning on it," she says, shrugging. "Reckon I might post up in the dungeons. Do some reading."

Zack tilts his head a little, something unreadable in his eyes. "Would you be cool with company?"

A happy bit of surprise sparks in her chest. "I'd— sure, I'd love that."

He smiles wide. "Brill. Was gonna get some soup for our boy and bring it up real quick first. You peckish at all? We can grab a bite from the kitchens an' take it downstairs?"

"Great," Kim answers, remembering her mental note from earlier. "Didn't realise I was hungry until you said that."

The two of them start to descend towards the Entrance Hall and Kim continues to sing under her breath. Zack holds out Madam Pomfrey's note on a landing, squinting a bit at the scraggly writing. "I mean, she gave us permission to get some food too? Not that we need a note, from my understanding. But it's a nice gesture."

Kim nods. "Have you not been in there before?"

"Nah," he replies. "We've a good stash of snacks in the dorm. Jay or Adam tend to go on food runs."

They fall into that same comfortable silence on the way down, reaching the marble staircase landing and finding the Entrance Hall empty, drafty like the rest of the castle. The lamps and torches flicker merrily along the walls, casting a warm light around the cavernous space that keeps out the dark and cold of the late winter afternoon.

Their footsteps echo through the hall as they descend the stairs, and Zack makes his way down carefully, mindful of the cane and his injured leg. "Any idea what kind of soup he'd like?" he asks, voice quiet.

Kim hums, turning with him to the left towards the door to the basement. "Butternut squash is his favourite. We'll get a bit of toast, too."

"Cool."

She holds the door open for him and they enter the narrow staircase, immediately greeted by warm air that sweeps the happy smells of cooking into their noses.

Kim sighs contentedly as they turn into the softly-lit corridor at the bottom and approach the large painting of a silver bowl full of fruit on the wall, sticking her hand out to tickle the green pear with her index finger. It squirms a bit and a green door handle appears, which Zack opens.

They enter the kitchens—a high-ceilinged, massive space directly beneath the Great Hall that contains four long wooden tables which mirror the ones upstairs.

Somewhere around a hundred House-elves are about, all wearing a crisp tea towel tied as a toga with the Hogwarts crest stamped on the front. Most seem to be finishing cleaning up from lunch: scrubbing gleaming brass pots, drying pans and dishes, and replacing cooking equipment back to their places heaped against the towering stone walls.

The great cooking fireplace is alight on the wall furthest from where Kim and Zack stand at the entrance, happy flamelight dancing on the flagstone, silhouetting the group of seven or so elves sitting in front of it on low stools playing a [song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eaEiu10DS_4). Two are picking and strumming small string instruments that sound similar to acoustic guitars, another is on a wood flute, and a lone female House-elf sings softly, her voice carrying through the room strangely; it reaches Kim's ears like she's sitting right next to them, the melodic language weaving around the jovial sound of the clattering of pots, _clink_ of utensils, and tiny voices.

Kim looks to Zack as he takes it all in, watching him smile as the other three elves [join in](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eaEiu10DS_4&feature=youtu.be&t=99) with enthusiasm on fiddles and a drum, causing nearly all of the elves in the place to start stomping their feet and dancing in place as they work, the music swelling louder throughout the room. Here and there, a few grab their neighbour and spin them around, smiling and singing along.

"Is that... Scots?" Zack asks quietly, as if in a daze; something like veneration lighting up his face. "I mean, I can get bits of it, so it isn't Gaelic."

And Kim's got goosebumps all over her body when she replies, "I reckon you're close — it's part Shetland."

Zack tilts his head, eyes still glazed over. "Our lad's dialect?"

"Yeah..." she trails off and pauses for a few seconds, allowing the music to fill her up. Smiling as she's drawn back into younger, warmer memories. "Jase'll be upset he missed it."

Zack peers at her curiously. "Do you know a little, then?"

Kim smiles softly. "Still familiar enough, I think. We three thought we were clever as kids, using it at school so nobody could understand us." Zack returns her smile and she furrows her brow, still trying to pin the rest of the song down. "But part of it isn't Shetland, I'm certain. Maybe an older dialect? or another language entirely."

He hums and they stand there together, listening.

Kim runs her hand through her hair and shrugs lightly. "Can't be sure. But I've never heard the same tune twice in here, so I suppose it'll be a mystery."

A pair of male House-elves approach them and give a little bow each. "Hello," the one on the right greets, their voice oddly clear over the music due to a foreign magic recognisable in an intrinsic, inexplicable way that Kim thinks she might be able to _feel_.

Zack tilts his head, perhaps sensing it too, and Kim links her hands together at her front, rocking on her feet a little. "Afternoon. Could we get a spot of lunch to take away, please?" she asks, looking between them with a kind smile.

The elf on the left nods quickly and gives her a polite smile in return. "What would you like?"

"Er," Zack starts, blinking quickly. "Might we please have a butternut squash soup with toast, a lemon ginger tea with a smidge of honey, a roast beef sandwich with chips..." he trails off and looks to Kim expectantly.

"A spicy chicken club sandwich with chips and three bottles of water, please," she finishes, as another elf brings a tall stool over and pushes it gently at the back of Zack's knees.

"Thanks," he mutters, adjusting his injured leg to stretch out in front of him, and the little elf bows before hurrying off.

Kim pats Zack's shoulder as the elf on the right gives them a curious look. "Tea and soup. Is a student ill?" they ask, small brow furrowing.

Zack nods. "Yeah, a friend of ours has a head cold. We're bringing him something to eat."

"Ah," the elf says kindly. "We can take it to him."

"Oh," Kim mutters, surprised. "You don't have to fuss, we can do it."

The other House-elf steps forward once. "Miss, we'd be happy to. It can be done in moments. But I will not overstep," he says, bowing again.

Zack blinks. "No, er—" he pauses, considering. "That'd be quite helpful actually. His name's Jason Scott and he's a fourth-year in Gryffindor House. The soup, toast, and tea are for him."

"And the third bottle of water," Kim adds.

The elf on the right nods. "Shall we include a note from you?"

"I— yes, sure," Kim answers, going to reach for her rucksack. Before she can shrug it off, though, another elf appears with a small pad of parchment and a pencil. She smiles warmly down at him, still feeling a bit fuzzy from the painkillers. "Thanks so much. You're doing a wonderful job."

The elf smiles back, pleased, and waits. Kim writes quickly, muttering along so Zack can hear, "'Feel better. Love, Zack and Kim.'"

She hands the notepad and quill back to the elf with a small, "Thank you," and Zack looks hesitant for a moment, drumming his fingers on his cane.

"Er, if you're going up there, can I ask you to bring something back down?" Zack asks, voice shy, and the elf nods easily. "Okay. I live in the same room as Jason — my name's Zack Taylor. My bed's next to his, on the right if you're looking at it, and underneath there're some vinyl records in a milk crate. Can you bring me the one called _Hell Freezes Over..._? It's got a light grey sleeve with a white square in the middle."

"I can do that, sir," the elf answers, and Zack smiles wide.

"Thank you so much, truly."

The elf bows before he walks off, disappearing with their note and Jason's food shortly after.

Kim and Zack wait for all of five minutes, listening to the music and marveling at the bustle, before the same elf returns with a sharp _pop_ , materialising a few feet away with a record sleeve in hand. He walks over to them and smiles. "Mister Scott says thank you. Here's your item, sir."

He hands the record to Zack and within another ten seconds their requested food is being brought to them in two brown paper bags by another elf.

Accepting it with a last round of thanks, Zack takes another look around before they leave, emerging into the warm stone basement corridor and directing their steps to a passageway that goes straight down into the dungeons.

Kim leads the way, walking slow so Zack can keep up.

He grimaces. "Weren't be a lift in this place, eh?"

And as the two of them continue to descend they find that every so often, the narrow stone staircase moves on its own by magic like an escalator in the London Underground, helping Zack down the last few steps in a flight.

Each time it does, Zack emits a tiny scoff and says something along the lines of, "I know, I know. But I can _do_ it. I was joking about the lifts!"

"It's just letting you know the option's available," Kim sing-songs, smirking as they hit another landing and curve around to the next flight. "But it'll stop if you ask. The castle's real respectful that way."

Zack hums, letting out a little laugh as he limps down. "I'm just being stubborn. It really _is_ nice," he mutters, patting the stone hand railing fondly. "Er— thanks, Hogwarts. Sure — I'd like some help, please."

The stairs underneath them start moving at once, the castle all but doing a little jig in its willingness to assist. A stone bench as wide as Zack's shoulders rises out of the step he's standing on, and he stares at it for a moment before sitting down. "Thanks."

Another seat appears next to Kim, and she shakes her head. "Oh, no thank you," she mutters, talking to the stone. "But I appreciate it." Her stair returns to normal, and she's about to step off at the bottom of the landing when she realises the floor is moving there, too, and stays where she is.

Zack begins whistling a carnival roundabout tune, and it's not long before they find themselves at the desired dungeon level.

Kim turns off, walking the corridor and a leisurely pace. The greenish light of the lamps casts an eerie glow over both of their faces, and Zack looks around curiously at some of the classrooms as they pass by, humming in interest every so often. "You know, I've never been more than a few storeys down here," he says, voice quiet. "Always 'fraid I'll get lost."

"Or you'll encounter some of my lovely House-mates?" Kim guesses, throwing a small smile at him.

He gives her a little acquiescing tip of the head. "Well, yeah. I also'd like to remain alive."

Kim hums. "Honest? It's too bad more people don't explore a bit. Like, I get why they don't — it's damp and cold and creepy... but it's kind of mad that _this much_ of the school is unused? There're so many rooms down here."

Zack nods, continuing to look around as they arrive at Kim's destination and go through the unlocked door, stepping into an old classroom: medium-sized, filled with high worktables and stools. Two large basin sinks are positioned along the left wall—with only one in working order, Kim knows—and the space is mostly otherwise empty, save for a large discarded cauldron in one corner.

Kim puts her rucksack down on the nearest table, waving her hand to ignite the long-necked goose lamp that cranes over it. "Would you prefer the floor? So we can elevate your leg?"

Zack considers for a moment, peering around. "If that's alright?"

"'Course."

They set up propped against the wall, Zack stretching his leg out with a small sigh. Kim digs into her rucksack and removes her beater gramophone before pushing her bag under his foot so he can prop it up.

"Thanks, Kimbo."

She jerks her head at the record in his hand. "Gonna tell me why you had that brought down?"

He smiles, taking it out and handing it over. "It has the song I was singing earlier. Just came out last month."

"Eagles?" she asks, squinting at the label in the low light. She opens up her gramophone case up between them and readies it, humming under her breath.

"Yeah."

Zack lights his wand and leans over to move the needle a bit, lining it up with where Kim presumes the track to be. She turns the hand crank a few times, waving her hand again to get it going on its own, and the song starts to play quietly.

Kim digs into the brown paper bags and brings their food out, depositing Zack's sandwich in his lap. He extinguishes his wand and uncorks her bottle of water unasked; Kim flexes her bandaged hand a bit, smiling in thanks.

"My dad really liked these guys," Zack tells her quietly, already started on his sandwich. He plunges his hand into his bag to bring out a chip. "Such a chill sound."

Kim nods, tipping her head back to rest against the cold stone wall as she chews. "We... don't know a whole lot about each other, do we?" she breathes, voice soft. Both of them a touch more honest now, apparently, with help from the potions they were given earlier.

Zack tips his head back to copy her, turning her way. He regards her for a few moments with something playful flickering in his hazy eyes, then takes a deep breath in and out. "My favourite colour's black."

She chuckles lowly. "Mine's... probably pink. Or green."

There's a pause as the two of them sit in comfortable silence for a minute, working on their late lunch happily.

Zack looks over at her again and gives her a small smile. "Favourite place in the world?"

Kim considers, then smiles back. "Might just be here. Hogwarts."

"Really?" he asks, voice gentle.

"Yeah," Kim says. Hesitates, sighing lightly. "I've had so much stuff happen here that's rubbish, but... there's nothing like it. So much to explore, I guess? So much to learn." She takes another bite of her sandwich. "Otherwise, the basement of my house, maybe. You?"

"The end of my mum's bed," he replies, a soft smile growing on his face. "That's where we play chess." He pauses. "You know she's ill — that tends to be the place she's most comfortable."

"That's really sweet, Zack."

He shrugs. "She's who I've got through everything, you know? Whatever I do, whatever happens, however my life turns out, it's her an' me." There's a pause as he pops another couple chips into his mouth, chewing slowly. "And magic helps, of course—she's not going to go any time soon. But it'll be much earlier than most people lose their parents. So I'm grateful for every bit of time we get to spend together like that—in her room, where she feels best, playing quietly."

Kim nods, the combination of the music and warm food in her stomach lulling her into something like a half sleep. "It's nice you're so close."

"I love Hogwarts too," he says quietly, taking a sip of his water. "There's something about it—being in a building that's so... _magical_. I remember the feeling the first time I walked in."

"Felt like home," Kim breathes, understanding.

"Yeah." He pauses, humming along to the song as it approaches the end. "Let's keep going. Ask me something else."

Kim considers, not speaking for half a minute. "How about... like, what do you want from your life? In the future, where do you wanna be?"

He doesn't take long before answering, "Don't have a sodding clue on a more general level. But job-wise, I'd fancy being some kind of crafter, I think? Maybe incorporate some inventing in there."

"Married?" Kim asks, quirking a playful eyebrow.

Zack shrugs. "I mean, if I find someone who can put up with me, yeah." He chuckles. "Might be nice. I don't got any... anxiety over it, though? Like, I'd never marry someone because I felt like it was something I was supposed to do."

"I feel that," Kim says. "Reckon it's tough when your parents didn't turn out that well too, you know?" Zack nods knowingly. "I mean, my parents _loved_ each other. And it still didn't work out in the end. I guess part of me hopes for a romantic partnership one day though, despite that. Someone who _gets_ me. Still loves me for everything I am."

She pauses, sighing heavily. "This is the potions talking, I think — but I've a hard time believing anybody'll ever be okay with... all of me. You know? I've already been such a git in my life."

"Sure," Zack says, voice gentle. "But you can look at it on the flip side too—you still've so much time to _become_." He pauses, brow crinkling as he takes a deep breath in and out. "Like, my mum and I used to get talking about life a lot when we were out gardening together. She did it a lot more when she was better... still does, but not as much."

He bops her shoulder with his. "And she said something once that's stuck with me: sometimes a plant can start out not great, right, and if it isn't thriving, you need to figure out why. So you change the light, change the location, change the soil. But you don't change the _plant_ , see? In order to help it along, you find out what it needs. Give it new sustenance to grow, new opportunity to flourish. It'll flower if it's in the right conditions — if the area around it supports growth."

Kim waits as he pauses, seemingly trying to phrase it, "We've a tree behind our caravan that my mum planted not long after I was born. Was this tiny seedling at the time, right. But now, all these years later, it's a proper tree! It's grown and lasted through bouts of illness, shitty weather, all of it—"

Zack stops talking and hums, playing with the lip of his brown paper bag. "Bonds between people are something that I've never quite been able to wrap my head around. They're so complicated, always evolving. But that's because _we_ are always evolving, always changing and growing. Sometimes you just... need to find the right spot to flourish."

Kim smiles as Zack puts his hand on hers and continues, "You'll find people who'll be more than okay with all of you. I know I am, and I know Jay is. Tommy is, Billy is. Trini is. And so many other people besides."

She takes a breath, a bit shakier than before. "Thanks, mate."

He shrugs lightly. "The most we can do is keep trying to be better. You're doing that — I see it. It's easy to, just being around you. We're all here with you."

Kim smiles at him, squeezing his hand gently. She blinks a few times and shifts a bit, shaking the pins and needles out of her foot. "Tell me about crafting. Is that something you've started doing, or is it more of a goal for later?"

Zack gives her a little tip of the head, considering, then goes for his rucksack. In another moment he's brought out an old dented glasses case and opens it with a small _creak_ , revealing a little knife and some spiraled wood shavings covering a small, intricately whittled wooden figure: a broomstick just smaller than the length of the case.

Kim gasps softly, taking it from him gently when he offers. She holds it in her bandaged palm. "You _made_ this?"

He puts his hand on the back of his neck, a small shy tick she's only seen rarely. "I did! Sort of silly, I know—"

"Zack," she interjects quietly, shaking her head, "it's lovely. I'd no idea this was a hobby of yours."

He nods. "I've mainly made stuff for my mum—wooden bowls and cutlery, that kind of thing. Getting decent at it though — I can do engravings and the whole lot now." Kim hums and he smiles softly, muttering through another mouthful of sandwich, "It's... nice. Quiets my mind, I guess."

"So you do it by hand?" she asks, examining it.

"Yeah. I'd like to try by magic one day."

"Mate, _I'd_ like you to try by magic one day, if that's something you want. I'll commission a whole set of little figurines like this."

He smirks at her and waggles his eyebrows. "Right. That'll be a hundred gold, payable up front."

Kim shoves him lightly, chuckling. "Arse."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'learn to be still' by the eagles.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO! welcome to a kim/zack chapter. I love their dynamic. it's been a long time coming to see them interact alone.
> 
> that scene in Creatures is straight out of the books, though we obviously watch it from harry's POV. always interesting to see it from a different angle. 
> 
> now, kim can sign! in MMPR canon she can sign ASL. given we're in the UK, I've changed that to BSL! our girl will aston has used it forever, given she's autistic and has episodes where she's nonverbal. so mack, as her best friend, learned it over time. you'll see them communicating like that here and there. but kim hasn't been hanging around them for long and hadn't seen it until that moment.
> 
> you might've guessed that hospital wing visits are a fairly frequent thing for hogwarts students, given how dangerous learning magic can be. some injuries are worse than others. but don't worry too much about kim and zack! theyre doing just fine.
> 
> fun fact: 'nutshell' by alice in chains is a song kim frequently plays at home on her acoustic guitar, which is another skill/hobby I've brought over from her character in MMPR.
> 
> passing mention of adam park, one of jason and zack's roommates. he's been named before I believe, but he doesn't hang around them on the daily. no bad blood at all, just different friend groups. I know he's loved by PR heads, and those of you who are big fans of his WILL see more of him down the line. fear not.
> 
> but yes! hope you guys liked that little bit about the kitchens. the descriptions are extrapolated partially, but mainly built on top of what we see when HRH visit in goblet of fire. the music's something I added because work songs are a thing across like... all human races and cultures. figured house elves certainly must have them as well. especially such a large group working at once!
> 
> the tune is an old scottish folk song out of shetland, if you're curious. with hogwarts being in the highlands, it felt appropriate. go ahead and click through to the link to listen! it's a modern interpretation obviously, but yes.
> 
> that little bit about the kids recognising a foreign magic with the elves is a nod to how the house elves' magic IS different than wizards, canonically. they can apparate etc within the castle, and we saw some of that with dobby in the books, where he wasn't restricted by certain limits on magic like the wizards were. 
> 
> ALSO HELLO YES HOGWARTS IS ACCESSIBLE! IT'S A MAGIC FUCKING CASTLE! and though JKR blabs about magic kind of... being able to sort out ailments and disabilities, she leaves room for magical illnesses and such — so witches and wizards DO have stuff like that, and not everyone is abled (see mad-eye moody). the castle is an incredibly magically potent building! if it can rearrange itself to make more dorms and things for different classes of students canonically, it certainly can be accessible for people with a wide range of disabilities.
> 
> we get into how other health things work in the wizarding world later on too, specifically in regards to how st. mungos hospital dealt with kim when she was suicidal. there's an inpatient mental health ward for that very purpose, and they have ways of treating patients who are struggling with that. incidentally, there've been mentions of kim being in her Depression Zone and that isn't figurative—she certainly takes medication for it. her mum's a healer, remember. and the meds are magical, mind, but still there. just like anti-depressants, they help her get on an even playing field with neurotypical folks.
> 
> cause... at their core magical people are still HUMAN, yaknow? therefore they have to be susceptible to that kind of stuff too. but yes, more to come on that down the line.
> 
> back to the kim and zack talking — there's a brief mention of zack's dad, here. just as a note, zack doesn't talk about him like he's awful, but it's definitely a sore spot. you'll find out more about him in the future, but zack's mum is muggle born and his dad was not, for reference. him being able to keep up with trini in regards to muggle stuff is because his mum and her muggle parents primarily raised him. the bit about him playing chess with his mum is from the 2017 film too, as is the fact that she's chronically ill.
> 
> and zack having a crafting hobby is a bit of a build on his whole... tendency to live in a train car sometimes in the 2017 film. that plus how much he does at home with his mum and their financial situation means that he's had to be quite handy. and he is! he also has some family history with it, which was mentioned in the chapter 'hold my hand'. his muggle grandfather had a shop where he crafted things and the like.
> 
> \---
> 
> THANKS FOR STOPPING BY AS ALWAYS! your readership warms my heart & your comments fuel me. love you all, and have a good weekend!


	34. Harmony Hall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/39exKIvycQDgs4T6uXdyu0?si=dLC2lKB3R8qxFMvAYjjaLA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

They're sat in the library for their group study period, ten minutes or so in. All is quiet save for the scratching of quills on parchment, rustling of pages, and small, pensive hums sounding here and there. And despite her crushing end-of-term workload Trini's elected to start off with some light for-pleasure reading: her glasses are perched on her nose as she finishes up the zoological column that appears in the _Daily Prophet_ every Wednesday.

"Hello, Kim and Billy. Is it still alright if I sit here vith you during this time?"

The voice causes Trini's heart to flutter excitedly in her chest, and her head snaps up from her article. Viktor Krum stands to her left, beside Billy at the head of the table, seeming a tad bit hesitant.

Kim looks up at him and smiles wide. "Of course," she replies, gesturing to the empty seat on her left.

Krum nods curtly and plods over, dropping into the chair with a light huff and beginning to take his writing materials and books out. When he looks up and catches Trini's eye, he gives her a tight-lipped smile and extends his hand over the corner of the table. "Hello, I'm Viktor. I am a friend of Kim and Billy."

Trini blinks rapidly. "Er... hi. I'm Trini," she mutters, gripping his large hand.

Jason and Zack are _staring_ , evidently trying to hide their surprise but not managing it very well. Billy waves happily at Krum from the other end of the table, who waves back with a genuine smile.

Looking between Zack and Jason, Krum hesitates for a moment then pops to his feet. Walks around Kim, grazing her on the shoulder with his fingers in greeting, the touch stunning Trini with its familiarity. He offers his hand to Jason, who gets up as well and draws himself up to his full height, taking up more space than usual.

"I'm Jason," he says, voice a note deeper than his regular tone. "Pleasure."

Krum grips his hand. "I am happy to meet you."

He makes his way around Billy then, giving him another soft smile but rightly not making to touch him, which causes Trini's brow to twitch.

_How long have these three known each other?_

Zack's posture, once standing too, is at ease compared to Jason's, but the look on his face is much more unreadable than usual. "Zack. Good to meet you, mate."

Krum shakes his hand with another curt nod. "Same here. I haff heard much about the three of you."

"Oh?" Trini says, as Krum walks behind her to take his seat once more. Plopping back down, he nods.

"Yes. Kim and Billy speak very highly of their friends."

Trini catches Kim's eye with a quirk of her eyebrow, to which Kim responds with a small smile, eyes bright. "We do," she agrees, shrugging one shoulder.

Though very curious about this entire development, Trini doesn't want to make Krum uncomfortable, so she turns back to finish reading the last couple paragraphs of her _Daily Prophet_ column. The words don't absorb as well as they usually do, and she sighs lightly as she pulls out her Astronomy chart to continue working on it.

In her peripherals, she sees Krum lean towards Kim a little, taking a thin tattered paperback novel out of his bag and pushing it her way. 

Kim's whole face lights up in a smile, picking it up gently off the table and flipping through. "So you found a... " she pauses, humming as her eyes flit over a page, "er, I can't tell the difference between Bulgarian and Russian text."

"They are the same," Krum responds quietly, reaching to run two fingers over some of the letters. "Or, similar. Each uses Cyrillic script. It is difficult to notice vhen you haff not learned both languages." He pauses, smiling softly. "Here is in the original Russian—I vas taught to read this in my schooling vhen I vas young."

"Have you finished?" Kim asks, and he nods. "And? How did you like it?"

Krum nods enthusiastically again. "I vas quite fond of it."

"It's quite satirical, eh?" Kim says quietly, keeping her voice low.

Krum smiles. "He is a very— erm," he pauses, brow crinkling. "Curt writer. I must say that I appreciate the recommendation. I haff only read _Crime and Punishment_ before this, and not with much care."

"This was the first Dostoevsky I read," Kim says, patting the book. "Then _Demons_ after."

"That vill be my next one, then."

.

"One, two, three. Two, two, three. Three, two, three. Four, two, three," Trini counts slowly, with one hand clasped in Cedric's and the other on his bicep, spinning together in an empty classroom a few days later. He treads on her foot but realises quickly, not putting enough weight down to hurt her.

"Argh. I'm so sorry—"

"Ced, it's _okay_ ," she says gently, then resumes. "You're doing great. Forward, side, close. Back, side, close."

They continue to dance, with Trini correcting him here and there. Professor McGonagall had recently announced that Hogwarts will be holding something called the Yule Ball on Christmas day, a staple Triwizard Tournament event. Apparently, a dance from the Champions and their partners is tradition.

With how nervous Cedric seemed about it, Trini decided to donate a few of her weekend hours to help him out. And he really isn't _bad_ — he can dance already and keep rhythm just fine; it's just the waltz steps that he needs to learn.

"Now turn me underarm with your left hand."

He does and Trini smiles as he guides her back in, taking her hand a little bit clumsily but managing it. They've been at this for an hour and he's already improved exponentially, but she can tell he's tired.

Trini stops and looks over at Billy, who's sitting in the corner next to his bright red _Columbia 9000_ gramophone and doing schoolwork. "Okay — we're good, Billy. I think that's it for today."

He smiles at her and makes a few more notes in his notebook before starting to pack up.

Cedric sighs heavily. "Honestly, thank you so much."

"Happy to help," Trini says, smiling at him and gripping his forearm. "After we do this again next week you're gonna be a pro."

He rubs at the back of his neck with one hand, tipping his head and scoffing lightly. "Okay. Whatever you say."

"You've nearly got the basics down," Trini insists. "Like I said, all you need is to get through the first dance. Then you can do your white boy flailing as much as you please."

He bops her shoulder with his elbow, smile widening as he walks over to his bag. "Coming to the common room?"

"Not yet. I'll be down later."

Cedric nods and gives a little wave to Billy as he starts to walk out of the room. "Thank you for the music, Billy."

Billy looks up. "No problem Cedric."

When it's just the two of them left, Trini walks over to Billy and stares down at his gramophone, shaking her head. "I'll keep saying it: that thing is _so_ rad."

"Glad you think so," he returns, latching it shut and swinging his rucksack over his shoulder. "I expect some people would regard it as ostentatious, but I love it."

"It's brilliant."

They exit the classroom together and begin to make their way up to the library, Billy humming ['Thank You For the Music'](https://open.spotify.com/track/1HNWHQqLxjI2LXnlIY9DTR?si=2rDS7LOXTLuGrDvQm7Zj7Q) by ABBA lightly as they go.

Trini finds herself yawning and dragging her feet unintentionally; it's a grey day outside, chilly and windy, and she's glad to be inside as she wraps Chip's red tartan blanket around her a bit tighter to shield against the drafty corridors.

"I've some instant coffee in my bag, Trini," Billy says, as they walk over the library threshold and she yawns for the third time. "I know it's not entirely ideal in terms of taste, but it might help."

"That'd be great," she replies, looking at him with a warm smile.

They soon reach their table to find Zack, Kim, and Jason, and Billy lets out a tiny, happy hum.

"Hey," Jason says, peering up from the mess of parchment pages scattered on the table in front of him next to his Potions textbook. Trini gives a half-arsed wave and Billy smiles wide as the two of them take their regular seats, Billy at the head of the table and Trini on Zack's right, facing the window that's at Jason and Kim's back.

Kim looks tired too—there are pronounced bags under her eyes and she doesn't seem entirely present, flashing a lazy smile at Trini and Billy by way of greeting. It's nearly the final week of classes before winter break, and they're all exhausted, what with all the tests, projects, and essays.

The five of them designated the next few hours for Potions review, given Snape told them this past week (in typical fashion) that they'll be sitting a test during their final lesson. Trini sighs and pulls out her books, bringing her notes out as well then lowering her head down to the table to rest her forehead there.

Billy takes a container of instant coffee out of his rucksack, followed by a mug, which he promptly makes a copy of. "Anyone else?"

Kim makes a little grunt sound and whips her head around, almost drunkenly. "Please."

Jason and Zack both echo her and Billy soon has five mugs in front of him. Out comes a thermos, then, filled with milk. The cap is a twist off and has a cache of sugar inside.

As he prepares them each a cup they all watch him fondly, smiling at how he remembers their coffee orders by heart, and each thank him as he sends the mugs carefully floating over.

"Okay," Jason mutters, voice cracking slightly. He clears his throat and sighs dramatically, then pulls a page of parchment towards himself by the corner. "So we've our old all-around antidote as a failsafe, and we all know that by memory—or we will after a brief review." Everyone nods, Zack's face slipping off his hand and nearly hitting the table. "We'll compile the review sheet today for each of the individual antidotes and use that to study, then quiz each other for the rest of the week until we all have it down…?"

"Sounds good," Billy says, opening _Asiatic Anti-Venoms_ with a soft _thud_ and beginning to flip through it.

Zack rubs his face with his hand. "So we still think he's gonna pick a random poison that we've studied then test us on our ability to brew the specific antidote, yes?"

Trini nods, taking her glasses out of their case and putting them on. "That's what Billy and I gleaned."

"Same for us," Kim confirms, sighing. "We're gonna have to memorise _all_ of them and then recall on the spot."

"Why don't we get a bit crafty to help with retention?" Trini mutters, shuffling through her notes. "I mean, there're some antidotes here that have very similar recipes. So we can sort them by similarity, then memorise them in blocks, you know?"

"Gotta love witches getting crafty," Kim chirps, in a stupid cartoonish voice that makes her sound utterly ridiculous. There's a light dancing in her eyes, causing them to crinkle at the sides with the effort of not laughing at her own joke.

Trini rolls her eyes. "I can't believe I'm friends with you."

Kim smiles innocently, her entire face still bright with held-back laughter. "Hey, you entered into this willingly."

"That's only because you tricked me into thinking you were cool initially—"

"Well, magical folk can be _tricky_ sometimes, Trin—"

Trini groans. "Son of a fuck," she murmurs, shaking her head in disbelief and looking away from Kim pointedly to address Billy instead. "B, what do you think about the sorting recipes idea?"

Billy smiles. "I figure it's sound. We just have to make sure we distinguish well between antidotes to avoid confusing ourselves."

Trini nods at looks between Jason and Zack, who both smile their agreement. She chances a glance in Kim's direction, finding her pouting like a toddler. Trini just stares back, face in an impassive deadpan, and quirks her eyebrow in a way that comes off _slightly_ more playful than she intended. "Is there something else you'd like to say?"

Kim flashes her a brilliant, goofy smile. "I'm glad I tricked you into being friends with me."

Trini blinks a couple times then mutters, "Yeah, yeah."

.

"' _SUNNY, THANK YOU FOR THE SUNSHINE BOUQUET..._ '"

Trini sails through the sky, happily content with the winter sun warming her face and the chilly air whipping around. It's a bright Sunday morning—early, overcast, and still. The Quidditch pitch below them is entirely covered in a few feet of snow, with two _huge_ drifts piled at either end of the stadium, blown to crest like giant frozen waves against the stands.

They've been playing for around an hour already, finding the break from studying entirely welcome.

It's their last pick-up match of the year, all of them excited at the thought of more to come. They're set on bringing two Bludgers into their future games, and Kim and Jason intend to approach Tommy again about coming to play in the new year. With some luck and a bit of careful choosing, they might even have some other people start to come out.

Trini will regularly get to beat iron projectiles through the air again, at long last.

(Once and awhile is nice, but it's much more fun when someone else has the ability to get you back.)

For the moment, though, she's got the Quaffle under her arm. Jason's on her right with a wicked smile on his face, so free in flight, and Zack's coming up on her tail.

It's two-on-two today, with Billy electing to sit it out in the stands below due to a tension headache from all the studying they've been doing. He's got Trini's gramophone at his side and seems to be enjoying the disc-jockeying responsibilities, currently playing Boney M.'s disco cover of ['Sunny'](https://open.spotify.com/track/6UTVzTRJdyLqAkezfal8pm?si=TwUoVW4ySXu4bTAyu_7TsA) at a volume that carries and echoes throughout the entire frosted stadium.

In another second Kim's appeared seemingly out of nowhere between Trini and Jason, swerving in expertly and bumping Trini's shoulder playfully. With a jostle, she reaches across to try and grab the Quaffle.

"No," Trini deadpans, twisting a bit and throwing a goofy smile at Kim. Jason drops down below them and moves to the other side; with her left hand Trini tosses the Quaffle up into the air and punches it in his direction.

He catches it and Kim goes right after him, doing all but hopping onto the back of his broom.

And Trini looks over just in time to see Kim stick one finger in her mouth—undoubtedly grimy from playing—then shove it into Jason's ear with a maniacal _cackle_ that sounds over the wind.

"KIM — YOU DODGY—" Jason splutters, swatting at her as she weaves around him and grabs the Quaffle with a bit of a struggle, pulling up on her broom to go into an honest-to-god _upside-down death drop_.

Trini's jaw hangs open, utterly gobsmacked.

After a few stunned seconds she shakes herself and wrenches her broom around, intent on chasing Kim down. She's soon in pursuit, watching as Kim plummets in what nearly amounts to a freefall before righting herself and pulling up a few feet above the pitch, ever casually showing off her flying prowess.

Laying as flat on her broom as she can muster and squinting at the sunlight reflecting off the snow, Trini quashes down her urge to cheer _loudly._

She levels out with Kim above the snow, and in few more seconds Kim whips her head around, grinning wickedly. In a quick swoop, she urges her broom a bit lower to drag the toe of her boot through the deep layer of powder that blankets the pitch, stirring up a huge cloud of snow in her wake.

Trini lets out a surprised yelp and swerves upward, managing to _just_ get her head out of it as she tries to soar above.

With a swipe of her gloved hand over her eyes she clears her vision, registering a healthy amount of snow that's made its way down the front of her robes, sticking to her everywhere.

And the chase is fun, but Trini knows she'll never catch Kim—normally, she wouldn't dream of racing her _Cleansweep Six_ against a _Nimbus 2001_ because it's no contest, like a stock sedan versus a sports car. With that plus Kim's daredevil drop move to boost her speed, there's no chance in hell.

Kim seems to have the same thought. Apparently not content with the lack of competition, she kind of slows right as she comes into the scoring area, seeming to deliberate for a moment before she stops entirely, drops the Quaffle, and awkwardly _punts_ it like a goalkeeper kicking a football.

Trini's eyebrow quirks as she watches it sail towards the goal hoops, herself coming up level with Kim just as it hits the edge of the one on the right and bounces off, goal-less.

"FUCK MEEEEEE!" Kim wails, though she's got the most ridiculous smile on her face.

"YOU SHOWBOATING IDIOT!" Zack hollers from up above them, laughing as he goes into a swan dive to catch it.

Trini urges her broom forward at once, darting by a still-stopped Kim to go after Zack; her stomach swoops with the quick drop, heart up somewhere in her ears, rocketing after the falling Quaffle with him ahead of her.

She doesn't sense Kim behind them—evidently too amused watching to throw her hat in—and Trini tries to squeeze everything out of her broom that she can. Hers is faster than Zack's, given he's riding one of the rickety old school brooms, but he's got a lead on her and is flying with complete and utter reckless abandon.

His typical fashion, really.

_Wait..._

Trini has no more than a few seconds to realise that the snowdrift immediately below them is coming up much quicker than expected, given there's usually way more space from the top of the goal hoops to the ground.

And Zack must arrive at the same conclusion, starting to pull up sharply at once, coming in too fast—

Without thinking, Trini whips her wand out of her forearm holster and casts a Cushioning Charm _just_ as he goes ploughing into the snow drift—it must be multiple storeys high, but she's not sure how much of it is ice underneath.

He disappears.

Pulling up to a full stop just above where he went in, Trini shouts down at him, frantic—

"YOU OKAY?"

Zack's muffled voice sounds from the darkness, somewhere far below, "Y— YEAH! FUCK EH!"

Kim is there in seconds, followed close behind by Jason. "Holy shit," she mutters, hovering next to Trini and peering down.

"ZACK, YOU EGG!" Jason barks, paler in the face than he was moments ago.

"CAN YOU MOVE?" Trini yells.

"NO!"

Trini, Kim, and Jason blink down at him, considering. "We can't levitate him out," Trini murmurs, chewing on her gum shield and thinking quickly.

Then, an idea.

She makes a quick backhanded shooing motion to Kim and Jason, who comply at once to clear some space. "Z! CAN YOU HOLD YOUR ARMS STRAIGHT UP? LACE YOUR FINGERS TOGETHER!"

"Trini, what—" Jason starts, but Kim stops him with a gentle hand over his mouth, watching Trini intently.

Urging her broom forward a bit, Trini takes extra care not to dislodge any of the snow. It's massively unstable and she can't risk causing the hole to collapse further. "SQUEEZE YOUR HANDS TIGHT!" she shouts, aiming her wand in Zack's direction. "FORGET THE BROOM! CLOSE YOUR MOUTH AND SHUT YOUR EYES!"

It's too dark to see him, so she concentrates as hard as she can on his gloves.

"OKAY, DONE!"

Trini waits another second before making a swish and flick motion, muttering, " _Wingardium Leviosa_." She raises her wand up steadily, conscious of not pulling his arms out of their sockets with the force—

Zack comes sailing up and over their heads in what's nearly a _Superman_ pose, powdered snow following him into the air in a brilliant cloud that sparkles in the sunlight.

Trini carefully curves her wrist to float him to the back of her broom, where he sits, spluttering a little.

"Holy fuck," he mutters in a small voice, wrapping his arms around Trini's waist.

"Are you hurt?" Jason asks, coming in close to run a gentle hand over Zack's shoulder.

"Don't laugh, but I sacked myself _right_ well."

Jason pulls a pained face. "Er— shit. Okay, lets get you sat down."

"You're so stupid," Trini mutters. Certainly relieved, but trying to keep her worried frustration at bay as she puts her wand away and steers them towards the middle of the pitch gently, where Billy's pacing back and forth in the stands, music notably silenced.

They all soon reach him and dismount onto the weathered wood platform. He watches, shaking his hand like a tambourine at his side, eyes wide and calculating.

"I'm fine, B," Zack mumbles, walking stiffly with a bit of a waddle. He sits on the nearest wood bench gingerly and sighs out his relief. "Already feeling better. T, whatever you cast saved my arse."

"I suspect the snow would've caught you well enough, if most of it was powder," Billy says quietly. "But it's likely frozen deeper down. That's... equivalent to hitting concrete at that speed."

Kim props her broom up against the railing and sits next to Zack, digging through her black and pink kit duffel. She brings out a soft cloth pack full of a grain-like material and mutters as she pokes it with her wand, causing steam to rise immediately into the chilly air.

And it must be enchanted to have a calming effect, because as soon as the light scent of lavender hits Trini's nose she can palpably feel it sinking into her mind. She shakes her head, propping her broom up next to Kim's and crossing her arms.

Kim places the beanbag warmer around Zack's neck, hanging it there like a gym towel.

He sighs out a word of thanks, shutting his eyes.

"You want, er, ice?" Jason mutters, looking at Zack with a raised eyebrow.

Zack groans. "I mean, yeah. I got it though." He turns around to grab his own kit duffel and brings out a soft ice pack, tapping it with his wand and muttering a Freezing Charm over it before sitting it on his groin gently. "Why am I such an idiot?" he whines, throwing his head back.

"Beats me," Trini growls, arms still crossed. Billy looks between them, running his foot over the wood board flooring of the stands and scuffing it repeatedly.

Kim's own knee is bobbing on the rickety wood platform as she peers up at Trini and gives her a _look_. "Trin—"

"Don't 'Trin' me," Trini says immediately, doing well at keeping her even composure, though there's a bit of fight threatening to leak into her voice. She looks back at Zack. "This's just for fun, Z. You don't need to have the dial up at a hundred percent for everything you do—"

"I _know_ , T—"

"I'm not trying to be a prat, but if you'd _just_ —"

"Guys," Jason interjects, putting a tentative hand on Trini's shoulder. "It's okay. Let's not argue."

Trini scoffs. "This isn't an argument — I'm informing him that he's a sodding lunatic." She pauses, pinching at the bridge of her nose and taking a deep breath. Trying to simmer down.

Jason pats her shoulder a bit awkwardly. "Well, yes, that's not up for debate, is it?" he quips, smirking at Zack, who returns it.

"Certainly not," Zack agrees easily, reaching a gloved hand out towards Trini with a pouty face. He's met with a deadpan stare, and he hums. "Crazy Girl, I'm sure you recall that we've _all_ done stupid things in pick-up—"

" _I_ managed not to crash, thank you," Trini mutters, rolling her eyes.

Kim puts a halting hand up in the air. "You scared us, Zack," she says softly, gripping his forearm. "That's what she's trying to say."

"The translation is unnecessary," Trini mutters drily, though her anxious, racing heartbeat is slowing.

"Always here to help," Kim chimes, a goofy smile spreading across her face.

.

The next morning Trini takes a deep breath in and out, tugging at her ankle to cause a satisfying pull in her hamstring and finish up her yoga routine. 

She sighs contentedly. The snowy grounds are asleep below her, stretching out in the growing brightness of the pre-dawn twilight. And it's easy, not having to be concerned with anything except letting the record whirling around on her gramophone—[ _Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Chambers)_](https://open.spotify.com/album/3tQd5mwBtVyxCoEo4htGAV?si=HzUxAAkmQYOkTrThcV0_DQ)—play out to its end, just over an hour.

It's quarter past seven or so; a bit longer than she would usually be up here, but it's no matter. She hasn't been tardy for Herbology yet this year.

(Which is really quite impressive, given Monday mornings have been dubbed by humanity to be Difficult, as a rule.)

A little extra time to unwind can be good, especially given she didn't sleep well last night, finding it difficult to settle after Zack's accident on the Quidditch pitch.

All turned out fine, sure. But it very nearly was _so_ much worse.

Rubbing her hands together, Trini breathes hotly into her gloves. A leftover muggle type of habit, perhaps, given the enchanted, thin cotton is keeping her fingers quite safe from the bite of the still winter air. Her breath rushes into her cupped hands in a quick huff, escaping out again and disappearing into the morning.

 _CLANK_.

Trini turns her head slightly, ear drawn to the familiar noise. Unfazed, she rolls her neck a bit and bends down to pack her gramophone up.

With a final glance at the grounds—eye catching on a handful of circular lights in the portholes of the Durmstrang ship as its occupants rouse for the day—she turns on her heel and crosses the parapet of the Astronomy Tower, swinging open the wooden door and beginning to make her way down the narrow spiral staircase.

_CLANK, CLANK._

The sound is like jingle bells striking cold iron, punctuated here and there by a dull _CRASH._ It becomes louder as she descends, and upon reaching the bottom she resists the usual urge to clamp her hands over her ears.

Trini finds the pearly-white ghost form of the Bloody Baron there, drifting around and rattling his chains about, and he looks up, eyebrow raised. When their eyes meet, she gives him a small nod in acknowledgement.

"Sir."

Ceasing his clanking and groaning, he peers at her curiously; face always impassive, to be sure. As unsettling as ever, save for the way his head tilts just _barely_ to the side.

Trini's learned him a bit by now; coming up here to float around and make noise is his favourite pastime. When she first arrived at Hogwarts he used to do it earlier in the morning, scaring her _witless_ when she first heard him.

It's a little more than an ominous noise when you're recently eleven years old, in a completely new school (that also happens to be an ancient magical castle), and expecting your surroundings to be mostly quiet as you go through your familiar yoga routine at the top of the tallest tower, presiding over the newfound peace that is the Hogwarts grounds in the early hours of the morning.

Needless to say she hadn't expected to hear the Bloody Baron and certainly froze when she did, terrified that some Eldritch monster had escaped from god-knows-where and was on its way up to the top of the tower to eat her for breakfast.

So, as the noise got louder, first-year Trini had:

  * wondered if whatever untrained magic she held within her could manifest to catch her if she flung herself off the tower to escape
  * seriously considered if she could take a run in the direction of the lake, jump, and manage to land in it
  * figured she might just be able to pull a move right out of an assassin film and hang off the parapets long enough for the monster to be fooled and leave



In her head, eleven year-old Trini—apparently determined to conquer her fear of heights in one fell swoop—watched herself scale the side of the castle, pull an unbelievable slow-motion stunt and bust through a window, arriving in a full classroom to fervent applause and awe from her classmates...

That is to say—

What she _really_ did was huff a lot, plop to the ground, cross her legs, and stare daggers at the door to the staircase.

Upon waiting for a half hour her fright had turned into impatience; the noise was still sounding loud and clear, but she had yet to be eaten, maimed, destroyed, or otherwise removed from this plane of existence.

What's worse, she was going to be late for class during her _first_ week at Hogwarts.

Excellent priorities, as always.

Which is how Trini ended up creeping down the spiral staircase amidst the racket getting louder, wand in hand but with as much use to her then as a rubber chicken, and holding considerably less entertainment value.

She stuck her head out of the staircase—standing even shorter than she is now, hair a lighter shade of brown from the summer sun—and looked around, finding the Bloody Baron there going about what she would find out later was his regular business.

He met her eyes then just as he is doing now, stopping his moping about to peer at her. Younger Trini stared back like a deer in headlights, and with an expectant, neutral movement of his arm, he gestured towards the door. Silently telling her it was safe to go.

Trini stands before him now, older. Still unnerved by him but no longer afraid — because though she avoided this tower like the plague after their first encounter, she quickly found in the weeks following that there was no other view like it at Hogwarts. She came back, surprised to hear him clanking around below her regularly a few days a week and soon deciding to bring her gramophone with her to drown out the noise.

And when she began to make a habit of it properly—yoga every morning in the rain, snow, or shine—she noticed that the music was no longer necessary; the Bloody Baron began showing up less and less.

It became apparent that he was merely coming at different _times_ of the morning, though, treating the Astronomy tower like a private timeshare held between the two of them.

To this day Trini's not sure if it was because he simply didn't want other people around during his raucous tantrum time, or if it was for another reason; perhaps he noticed how pale her face was that first time they met, how wide her eyes were. How her hands shook at her sides as they regarded one another.

Perhaps he had noticed her music; wondered why a person would be possessed to come to the highest point in the castle every morning if not for some time alone.

Perhaps he understood then, and still does.

And he gives her an incline of his head now, returning her nod. It's curt but polite. Almost amicable.

Trini leaves and begins to descend through the castle, yawning as she goes. She stretches her neck out a bit, reveling in the looseness of her muscles, and sighs contentedly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title track is 'harmony hall' by vampire weekend.
> 
> \---
> 
> HEY! we're on our way to winter break. the rest of the kids meet krum during library hangouts—he won't be around very often, but you'll see him here and there. kim and billy hadn't mentioned it not out of... secrecy per se, but more because krum is becoming an actual friend. and how do you bring something like that up, anyway?
> 
> well, now the other kids know! look forward to a certain kim/krum buddy interaction at one of their hogsmeade trips next semester, which trini is going to be... unhappy about. 
> 
> note that krum is VERY interested in hermione, and kim is aware of this. it is FRIENDSHIP! but trini doesn't _know_ that.
> 
> whoops!
> 
> kim and krum are talking about a book called [_notes from underground_](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Notes_from_Underground) by dostoyevsky. she rec'd it one day when they were talking. obviously he's a prolific russian writer, so krum would've been taught his stuff in school, most likely. he hadn't read this one tho!
> 
> now! the wizarding world is fairly old fashioned in a whole bunch of respects, and dancing is included in there. most kids who've been raised in wizarding society likely know how to dance, but there are others like cedric who dont, of course!
> 
> trini doesnt DANCE, per se, but she's a good dancer. kim and jason, fun fact, DO dance! they were contemporary ballet partners back in the day. that's a MMPR canon reference to OG kim and teaching her dance classes at the youth centre, and with OG jason's martial arts background, I thought it translated nicely. 
> 
> he does martial arts, too! as a note. both him and tommy, same as canon. but yes. you'll see jason and kim dance in the summer between years 4 and 5, and kim still has her summer job teaching. good times.
> 
> billy's gramophone was his fathers. it's one of a few things he's inherited, including his silver pocket watch. 
> 
> trini's broom is unable to keep up with kim's because they're very different makes & models! and trini's position as a beater is ranged, so having a broom that isn't lightning fast has never massively hindered her. 
> 
> (having some speed would likely do great things for her playing, mind. but she's been kicking ass just fine without it so far.) 
> 
> cause trini's family isn't well off—we're not talking the same as zack's, but her dad can't afford to buy one new. racing brooms are VERY expensive, canonically! so hers is secondhand and wasn't in the best shape to start (though she takes excellent care of it). she's making it work!
> 
> but yes. I believe the weasley twins ride cleansweep 5's, and trini's got a 6. newest model is 7 (which ron gets later on) so trini's isn't _actually_ ANCIENT, but it certainly feels that way sometimes!
> 
> hope you liked kim being a remarkably skilled dumbass with the death drop. and punting the quaffle is just... sigh. they're all having fun together!
> 
> also! on trini's use of a levitation charm to get zack out—she said 'we can't levitate him out' cause they couldn't! she had to go for his gloves because that spell canonically doesn't work on PEOPLE. trini, as our resident charms whiz, knew this and got clever with it. levitated his gloves with him IN them, see? kim did something similar with her boots in chapter 22! 
> 
> (friendly reminder that quidditch is fucking dangerous!?!)
> 
> witness our first tiny argument between the core 5 and note how they dealt with it! their dynamics are so interesting, and they all compliment each other SO well. more about that later, but trini being anxious about the accident makes sense. it freaked her out!
> 
> as for trini and the bloody baron, that's a build on HP canon. he very much clanks around the astronomy tower as a pastime, so they'd encounter each other quite frequently.
> 
> \---
> 
> next time, we have a little glimpse of the kids being disasters in the lead up to winter break. also, we see moody teaching! he's going to be around in future chapters because of something that happens with kim.
> 
> I'll do a bit of a note on him later, given he's... not MOODY, as you know. he's barty crouch jr using polyjuice potion, but nobody knows that yet. and that's SUPER interesting to me in the context of kim and her father's death eater-ness, because barty jr would've been around during the war. he's certainly more than familiar with kim's father, and the extent of that'll be explained by maddy in... summer between years 4 and 5. so not too long off.
> 
> THANKS FOR READING AS ALWAYS FRIENDS! I'm stoked that people are still newly finding this and braving the slowly building word count. your comments are SO FUCKING LOVELY to get.
> 
> for those of you who have been here for awhile already, I see you and appreciate you so very much. from the bottom of my heart, I can't thank you enough.
> 
> until next time, and take care of yourselves!


	35. Making Due

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/0EPJwMOyGYTsaJbHENRJVb?si=KJD0d8GtR_GGjfNH0NKKaw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The final week of school begins in a rush, with too many assignments and tests bearing down on all of them to allow the thought of much else. They spend what spare time they have in the library along with what seems like the entire Hogwarts student population, cramming notes and scribbling final papers; eager for it all to be over with.

Tuesday finds Kim walking into the Muggle Studies classroom behind Jason, trailing Billy as they file into the row just in front of where the rest of their regular knot of Gryffindors are sitting.

Taking her seat, Kim brings her end-of-term essay out from her bag carefully, unrolling the parchment a bit and scanning her attempt at neat writing. She's fairly satisfied with it—they were tasked with writing about the effects of the automobile on present-day British muggle society, to Jason's delight—and she's happy for it to finally be out of her hands.

"Ah, fuck," Zack mutters from the seat behind her, beginning to scramble through his bag and continuing to swear under his breath.

Sky peers at him curiously, playing absentmindedly with her long blonde hair as Mackenzie comes peeling into the classroom with Rocky hot on her heels, both looking very frazzled with noticeable bags under their eyes.

The two of them sit and Will gives Mackenzie a look. "Done, then?" she asks, a sly smile pulling at her lips.

Mackenzie tips her head back and sighs heavily. "Yes."

Kim chuckles. The two of them were absent for History of Magic, which isn't entirely unusual in Rocky's case, but Will had mentioned that they were up all night finishing their essays.

"Babe, you have ink on your jaw," Sky mumbles, turning to where Rocky's slumped in his seat beside her. She licks her thumb and starts to work at it, frowning at its refusal to come off.

"It's fine, it's fine," Rocky says, gently swatting her away. He takes her hand and kisses it, letting out a sigh just like Mackenzie's.

Zack, meanwhile, has now upended the entire contents of his rucksack into his lap. "Shit—" he grabs at the pile—pages of parchment, a notebook, his pencil case, and varied granola bars and snack wrappers among the clutter—and unceremoniously drops it into Rocky's lap, who barely reacts, head still tipped back on the seat and eyes closed, "think I left my essay in the dorm."

"Didn't you have it...?" Billy starts, frowning.

"Take your seats, everyone. We're about to start," comes Professor Burbage's voice, as she looks up at the class over the top of her spectacles from the front of the room.

"Bugger, bugger, bloody hell," Zack splutters, getting up and racing to the front of the classroom. He skids to a stop in front of Professor Burbage's desk and says something lowly to her. She meets him with a half amused, half unimpressed look, then gestures lazily towards the door.

With that, Zack sprints from the room without another word, a few curious people turning to watch him as he goes.

Jason shakes his head in a very Exasperated Dad type of way. "I swear I _told_ him to double-check his bag before we left this morning."

Kim grimaces as Burbage gets out of her desk chair and turns to start writing on the blackboard. "Hope it didn't fall out in the History room or something. You think Burbage'll believe us if we tell her that we saw him finish it yesterday?"

"Let's not think like that unless he really has lost it," Billy says, humming to himself and drumming his fingers on his own essay as he removes it from the small protective parchment tube in his rucksack.

Kim looks back over at Jason to find him staring at her like she's just casually uttered the answer to the meaning of life. The colour drains rapidly from his face as his eyes glaze over, seeming to look through her, and Kim meets his eyes and quirks her eyebrow in question.

He doesn't answer the silent ask, instead opening the top of his fancy rust-red leather messenger bag with a _thwap_ , movements jerky and beginning to rifle through it just like Zack was a minute ago.

"Merlin's _pants_ ," Jason mutters after half a minute, eyes wide.

Shoving his bag into Kim's lap with a spluttered apology, he whips out of his seat and jogs up to the front of the classroom, face red as he hesitates before wheedling around to Professor Burbage's right side. She stops writing on the blackboard pointedly, turning her whole body to face him with a stern look.

Kim hears the words, 'interruption' and 'honestly' while Jason rushes out what looks like an apology, and in another few seconds he's flat-out peeling from the room towards the door, back out into the corridor.

Rocky laughs quietly from behind Kim and Billy as Burbage starts to lecture. "Some people can't keep their shit together, eh?"

Kim whips around and roll her eyes, giving Rocky a once-over. "You've got your joggers on still, Mister Together," she chirps quietly, smiling.

Rocky's eyes widen as his head whips down to look, finding that he indeed is missing his uniform trousers, instead wearing his light grey joggers, complete with the sportswear logo on the thigh. "Oh, fuck _me_."

"End of term's a bitch," Mackenzie mutters at the ceiling, looking like she's about to fall asleep with her head tipped back on the top of her chair, essay clutched in her hand and slightly scrunched up.

Kim chuckles in agreement. With all of the papers and tests this week, she can't wait for it to be over.

"I'll have all of your essays, if you please," Professor Burbage calls, waving her wand and causing all of their papers to glide gently out of hands, off of writing tables, and up and out of rucksacks. Kim watches hers go, meeting the rest and coming to land in a neat pile atop Burbage's large claw-footed desk at the front of the room.

It's not ten minutes later when Jason comes speed-walking back in, making sure to close the heavy wood door as quietly as possible behind him. He has two rolls of parchment clutched in his hand — they fly away from him almost as soon as he enters.

Professor Burbage pauses her lecturing briefly to address him, "You were successful then, Mister Scott?"

Jason nods quickly, cheeks further reddening at everyone's eyes falling on him. "Yes, Professor. Zack's is there as well."

Burbage hums and the two rolls of parchment find the pile on her desk. "Lovely." She turns back to the board, pointing at the notes written there in chalk and resuming the lesson, "And when we speak of Fordism and the impact on muggle working conditions of the first half-century, we must remember the context of the Industrial Revolution from our previous unit..."

Jason comes back to sit, collapsing into his seat heavily and taking his bag off Kim's lap with another apology. "They were in the History classroom—you were right," he breathes.

Kim blinks at him, surprised. "Oh? I was joking."

Jason nods, taking out a fresh parchment page to start taking notes. "I know. But I completely forgot — Zack and I were comparing the length of our essays before lesson. Left them on an empty seat."

"Comparing sizes, _were_ you lads?" Mackenzie chirps lowly.

Will smacks her on the back of the head. "Come off it, you perv."

Kim chuckles, and without taking his eyes off his notes, Billy frowns. "Zack isn't going to know you found them, Jason," he whispers, nudging Jason's knee with his own. "I'd reckon he's tearing your dorm apart."

"Arse," Jason mutters. He stops writing, considering. "I can't leave again or she'll have my head."

"I caaaaaaaaan," Mackenzie drawls lowly, and Jason turns around to look at her. "I'm gonna pass out if I sit here any longer. Love the Burb, but I got my paper in—it's nap time."

"You sure?" Jason asks.

Mackenzie nods. "Bring my stuff up after class and you've got a deal. Don't want to look like I'm leaving proper."

"How respectful," Sky deadpans.

"I'm trying, alright," Mackenzie replies, now watching Burbage intently. "Okay, I'm just gonna go. If she asks, tell her I... went to be sick or something."

"Great," Kim mutters, watching with amusement as Mackenzie—swaying almost drunkenly from exhaustion—gets to her feet slowly, goes into a nearly spot-on _Pink Panther_ impression, and slinks from the room.

Burbage is known for being a laid-back teacher, so if she notices, she doesn't say anything.

They spend the remainder of the lesson wrapping up their unit, this being the last class before the winter holiday. Zack comes tip-toeing in after twenty minutes, sending a shy look to Professor Burbage which is met with a curt nod, and sits back down behind Kim.

"Mack find you, then?" Jason whispers, turning a bit to see him.

Zack nods, breathing heavily. "Yeah. Thanks for grabbing mine, mate."

Jason smiles. "No prob. Glad we got them in."

"Jase'd also like to apologise for doubting you," Kim quips.

Zack looks confused for a moment before smiling. "Thought I was disorganised, did you bud?" he asks, taking out a sheet of parchment and beginning to scribble down the notes on the blackboard.

Jason flashes an apologetic grimace. "Sorry."

Zack makes a kissing noise in response, and everyone settles in for the remainder of the lesson.

Once it's over Kim gets up slowly, stretching with a satisfied hum, and they all make their way down to lunch.

They enter the Great Hall, the smells of food beckoning them inside, and Jason directs his steps towards the Gryffindor table.

Trini joins them a short time later, yawning wildly.

"Did you nap?" Zack asks, pouring himself a glass of pumpkin juice.

Trini shakes her head, going for a pot of coffee. "Nah. Almost fell asleep working in my dorm so I moved to the library." She looks to Kim and jerks her head. "Finished the Runes translations, if you want."

Kim smiles and chews a bite of her ham sandwich before answering, "Thanks, but I did them last night. Was going to ask you the same."

Trini nods and pinches the bridge of her nose, sighing tiredly. "Boys, you still up for our jog? I could use it."

"Yeah, we brought our stuff," Zack replies, nodding. "Might be a nice de-stressor."

"Agreed," Jason says, smiling at Trini.

.

"We're going into Counter-Curses and Hex Deflection next semester," Professor Moody's saying an hour later, writing on the blackboard in his scrawled hand.

Rose hums curiously from beside Kim, and a few other heads in the class perk up at his words.

"Does anyone know the incantation one would most often use to block or deflect an enemy spell?" Moody asks, turning to peer around at everyone.

Ziggy Grover puts his hand up from a few desks in front of Kim and Rose, and Moody nods at him. " _Protego_ , I think?"

"That's correct. Five points to Slytherin," Moody answers, writing it on the board with the heading 'Shield Charm' and underlining it. "You lot don't have to write this down yet, I'm just giving an overview."

Kim hums, leaning back in her seat and listening intently. She tips back on two chair legs and notices Moody's eyes on her as she does.

"And do any of you know the Shield Charm, yet?" Moody asks.

The class is silent in response, and Kim shifts a bit. She knows it—it's one of the spells her mum insisted on teaching her last year, when Kim told her about the bullying she was experiencing at school—but she's not about to volunteer. They haven't learned it in class yet, after all. 

When nobody says anything, Moody grunts. "Nott, on your feet."

Theodore Nott does as he's told, more apt to listen to Moody than he is most Professors, from what Kim's noticed. He walks down the right aisle to the front and waits expectantly, crossing his arms.

And Kim's watching the front of the class as Moody's eyes fall on her again. "You — leaning back in your seat. Fairly comfortable eh?"

Kim's eyebrows shoot up at being called out. Moody flashes what might be a smile her way, though it looks a tad diabolical on his scarred face, and jerks his head. "Up. You two are going to demonstrate."

Blinking her surprise away, Kim grits her teeth and slowly tips back onto four chair legs. She feels eyes on her as she rises from her seat, drawing her wand out of her sleeve as she walks up to the front of the class, robes swishing around her ankles.

Moody indicates for her to stand on the far side and she does, with Nott squaring up to her.

"Cheering Charm is innocuous enough — Nott, I want you to use that," Moody instructs, then looks to Kim. "You will try to block it with a Shield Charm. Again, the incantation—" he gestures to the board, "is _Protego_."

Kim makes an effort to look unbothered, though Nott clearly figures he's about to get a free shot at her in front of everyone.

Moody steps away, facing the class with his back to the blackboard. "Three, two—"

Nott jumps the gun and sends a spell at her a beat too early but Kim's ready, muttering, " _Protego_ ," and throwing her free arm up instinctively across her torso.

The spell hits her practised Shield Charm with more force than a Cheering Charm should be able to muster, sending her skidding back half a foot but otherwise on balance.

Moody grunts at Nott, eyes flashing displeasure. "Twenty points from Slytherin," he growls, glaring pointedly. "Try disobeying me in my class again and you'll regret it. Don't think I know what a Knockback Jinx looks like, boy?"

Nott grits his teeth and bows his head a bit. "Sorry, Professor," he mumbles.

Kim keeps her eyes on Moody as he turns to give her a once-over, expression almost unreadable. "Hart, right?"

An inexplicable skip of anxiety flits through Kim at him saying her name, and she nods slowly in affirmation, aware of how his good eye flashes different, just for a fraction of a moment. Something like familiarity; almost like he's impressed.

And Kim wonders if Mad-Eye has ever encountered her father. It's certainly possible — her dad works as a Curse-Breaker for Gringotts, and though that usually takes him out-of-country, it wouldn't be surprising if Moody's time as an Auror had brought him 'round to some ancient cursed wizarding estate in Britain, perhaps, if there was Dark Magic involved.

_Maybe they've worked the same case a few times?_

She's certainly never spoke up or answered a question in this class; never talked to Moody one-on-one. Her name's on the class registry, but for him to know who she is by sight causes an odd sensation to settle at the bottom of her stomach, like a heavy cold stone coming to rest there.

"Well done. Ten points to Slytherin," Moody says, after a pause. Still holding her gaze. He gestures for the two of them to sit, and Kim thanks him quietly before making her way back to her seat.

She gets a couple approving nods from her fellow Housemates as she goes, and other looks that clearly say they were hoping she would get thrown a few feet onto her back.

Once her and Nott are both sitting again, Moody resumes lecturing. " _That_ is an example of a solid Shield Charm," he says, turning to write on the board again. "Though your form needs work, Hart."

Kim inclines her head, not offended. She doesn't exactly have combat training.

"But that's a very human instinct — to throw a hand up to block a spell," Moody continues, now magicking the chalk to draw a rough sketch of a person on the board with their wand pointed forward. It starts moving like a wizarding photo, going through the motions of casting then reverting back over and over.

"Proper form is stance shoulder-width apart," he explains, pointing to the figure's feet moving, "and you want to use your off-hand to either provide leverage for casting or to offset your weight if you're in motion. Balance is important — not often will you be in a duel where both sides are standing still, unless it's in a controlled school environment like this..."

Rose bops her shoulder into Kim's. "Good going."

Kim gives a small smile, adrenaline draining out of her. Heartbeat returning to normal.

She makes a mental note not to lean back in her chair in this class again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'making due' by the arkells.
> 
> \---
> 
> good day! bit of a shorter one this week, so we're a touch early. have some lead up to the winter break, school-wise, and a bit of moody. I've always found him to be one of the best defense teachers in the books, along with lupin. (which is sort of funny, as you all know, given THIS moody's a death eater in disguise.)
> 
> as much as I hate to say it, snape was good too. again, practicality in defense is... so important. you can't learn to defend yourself via theory.
> 
> but yes... moody recognising kim and her last name is a thing, of course. because he KNOWS kim's dad. the extent of that, like I said last authors note, will be explored by maddy when she's talking to kim about it in the summer between years 4 and 5. but kim isn't aware of the depth of it at this stage.
> 
> now! this is the calm before the storm of a couple kim-intensive, very heavy chapters, where shit gets a bit messy. there's a confrontation with some of her housemates next update, and you're going to see firsthand the type of bullying she's had to deal with in the fallout of being deemed a blood-traitor (by the assholes in her house who subscribe to that type of thinking). I'll trigger warning for that when it comes.
> 
> mind, we saw a bit of it in the flashback when jason punched that upper-year slytherin guy, back when kim was telling trini about everything that's been going on during their talk in hogsmeade. but yeah. it's not just amanda she's had to grapple with, as a reminder. 
> 
> cause kim was certainly dealing with this type of bullying BEFORE the Amanda Incident, when she came back to hogwarts in third year and started to... try not and be a dick anymore. basically. she's that thawed out mean person/ice queen that suddenly starts to be nice, which is perceived as weakness by a LOT of people. 
> 
> so amanda specifically harassing her is something kim thinks deserved, which we've seen already. she has a complicated response to it, somewhere between guilt and the urge to defend herself. but other people going at her? that is VERY different.
> 
> you'll remember from the jason flashback that kim was... much more resigned to it before, too, almost using it as a kind of atonement for the things she had done. but that flashback was just over a year ago now, in-universe time, and kim also didn't have the people on her side then that she does now. she was much more... alone.
> 
> mind, kim is a remarkably skilled witch, remember. with that plus having a GROUP of friends now who care about her, the present-day confrontation will be different.
> 
> we also will get a bit of background on gregory in the next couple chapters, who you remember as kim's sentient statue good friend that guards one of the passages out of the school. we never meet him in the books, but he's referenced here and there. another canon bit I've built out!
> 
> he has a REALLY interesting story, and I won't dump it all on you at once. but he's more important to kim than even she realises.
> 
> what else? a bit of interaction with the other gryffindors here, and what I believe is the first proper glimpse of muggle studies as a class. we had a brief look back at the beginning of this story, but didn't see any of burbage teaching. she is... SUCH a good. a legitimate badass and I love her.
> 
> \---
> 
> THANKS FOR READING AS ALWAYS EVERYONE! holy shit the comments some of you have been leaving are... so lovely, and I can't thank all of you enough for taking the time to leave a note. especially the first-time commenters! I know it can be hard and people get anxious, so it's so very much appreciated.
> 
> for the record, your comments can be anything from a heart to a smiley face to a keysmash, to a line or bit of characterisation you liked, or something you thought of while reading. it doesn't have to be a huge in-depth thing (THOUGH THOSE ARE SO FUCKING GREAT AND THANK YOU SO MUCH TO THOSE OF YOU WHO DO THAT! IT MAKES ME SO!).
> 
> but yes. I appreciate the heck out of you all. take care, and until next time! <3


	36. Mount Everest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***NOTE: trigger warning for a bully encounter & some light violence.
> 
> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/18wCJcoFmXZ0jfrFhF6cYS?si=EqYigyzsRKO2sK5oIqygcQ). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Later," Kim says on Thursday afternoon, waving goodbye to Rose as she walks out of Charms and into the corridor.

She goes at an easy pace, humming to herself as she makes her way towards the Transfiguration department, intent on meeting up with Jason and Zack and walking down to lunch together.

Turning out of a passage and into another corridor, she finds it's not _too_ busy, but enough people are present for her to do a quick glance over everyone's faces.

Keeping an eye out for trouble, as always.

" _Kim, you okay?_ " Ptero asks in Parseltongue, no doubt noticing her heart rate pick up.

She averts her eyes from the cause—a group of upper-year Slytherins coming out of a classroom up ahead—and swerves casually to get a bit closer to a handful of Ravenclaws walking just ahead of her, trying to blend in. Resisting the urge to duck behind them.

Ptero tickles the back of her neck with his tail, hidden by her hair. Looking for a response.

Kim smiles softly, mouth a bit tight, watching in her peripherals. " _Awake, sleepy?_ "

" _Only barely_ ," Ptero replies, not moving his head.

Kim weaves through a few more students as the group of Slytherins passes by, the corridor still not too crowded. Calculating quickly, she decides to aim for a smaller set of stairs hidden behind a large painting twenty yards away. " _You and me both. Can't wait for the semester to be done_."

" _One more day!_ " he hisses, wrapping a bit more snugly around her neck.

Kim feels their eyes find her before they say anything, her body coiled tight already when one of them loudly sneers, "Dirty bitch."

Some of the Ravenclaws ahead of her turn around, startled by the grating vitriol in the voice, and frown. Kim weaves around them, straightening her spine, flexing her left arm where her wand holster resides but not acknowledging the comment.

"HEY. I'm talking to you, Hart."

A few people walking the other way look at her, confused. Because she's well-known enough from Quidditch—it's hard for her to be anonymous in the castle, no matter where she goes.

So Kim doesn't even try to stop herself; she wheels around in the most unbothered way she can manage, face set to impassive, and finds the Slytherins much closer to her than expected. Clearly having followed as soon as they spotted her.

She quirks her eyebrow and raises her head defiantly, waiting.

It's four sixth-years: three boys and one girl, all vaguely familiar to her. She recognises one to be Cassius Warrington, who tried out for the Quidditch team last year but didn't make the cut; he was one of two Chasers brought in for the IHC final against Gryffindor when her and Adrian refused to participate.

The uppity guy who yelled at her tilts his head arrogantly. "That's better. Scum should answer when called."

And the lone girl pipes up, stepping forward, "Or maybe you don't like your surname so much these days — ashamed of daddy, are you?"

Kim's eyes flash and her lip pulls back in a snarl, stunned at the underhanded implication but determined to keep her head. Because plenty of kids in Slytherin have family and friends in the Dark Lord's service, but it's not something discussed—let alone mentioned—in _public_.

It's a fairly vague statement for anyone who doesn't know the context, though, and she notes the other kids watching the altercation in silence around them, the corridor strangely quiet.

"Find something else to do with your time," Kim growls, squaring her shoulders. "I'm tired of this."

The guy who yelled after her steps closer. "Here's a thought: nobody cares what you're tired of."

Kim coolly draws her wand out of her sleeve and points it at him with a steady hand, eyes dangerous. "Fuck you. I don't even know who you are." She jerks her head at the girl and clicks her tongue cruelly. "And you— starved for attention, are we? _Your_ troll of a father doesn't send enough birthday cards from Azkaban?"

They both reach for their wands but Kim's faster, twice muttering, " _Flipendo._ "

 _BANG_ , _BANG_.

The force of the spells send them rocketing backwards, one after the other, landing a few feet down the corridor on their backsides. The guy hits his head on the floor and grunts, looking dazed, and Kim advances a few smooth steps, pointing her wand at Warrington and the other boy, who snigger and hold their hands up.

Kim waits for a few moments in the tense silence, eyes darting between the four of them. When they don't make to retaliate, she backs up a few feet, pulse hammering in her ears.

"What's going on out there?" comes a gruff voice from a classroom behind the group of Slytherins, no doubt in response to the sound of spells going off.

Not looking to stick around, Kim glances one more time at them before slowly turning around and beginning to make her way to her intended passage, trying very hard to keep her steps slow and nonchalant; still determined not to look shaken up.

She's no more than a few steps away when a _stab_ of white-hot pain shoots through her left knee, collapsing it under her—

Whirling around again and half bent over, she sees the girl on the floor where she left her—nose bleeding from the Knockback Jinx—pointing her wand in Kim's direction and looking _pissed_.

Kim splutters out, " _Protego_ ," on reflex, just in time to block another nonverbal spell.

"WHAT! IS IT! WITH YOU _IDIOTS_?!" booms the same gruff voice as before, and Professor Moody comes lumbering out into the corridor, gnarled face livid. "CURSING SOMEONE WITH THEIR BACK TURNED IS DESPICABLE BEHAVIOUR!"

He looks between the four upper-year Slytherins—two still sprawled the ground—and Kim rapidly. "Rowle, Hart — in here _now_."

Kim tilts her head back a bit, frustrated, and takes a deep breath in and out. She shuffles her leg gingerly to test it, unwilling to look weak, and nearly cries out when she puts a bit of weight down.

Holding back tears, she grits her teeth and walks forward, limping as little as she can manage and holding her head high. Picturing hitting them a few more times; annoyed with her own negligence. 

_It was stupid to turn your back._

Rowle gets up from the floor and wipes at her bloody nose angrily, long platinum blonde hair flying as she stomps into Moody's indicated classroom. He waits in the doorway, watching Kim approach with an unreadable look on his face.

"Don't you all have places to be?" Moody barks, glaring at the spectators still gathered in the corridor. "You three, though," he adds, looking to the Slytherin boys, "would do well to wait out here."

The remaining students get on their way, not needing to be told twice, with everyone in the vicinity giving Kim a wide berth as they pass by.

Kim comes to the door, Moody still staring at her. Mumbles a courtesy, "Professor," through gritted teeth as she passes.

Rowle is perched on a desk a few rows in, arms crossed and staring daggers at Kim as she arrives, which Kim returns in full force.

"Would either of you care to explain?" Moody growls, shutting the door and turning to them expectantly.

Kim keeps her mouth shut and Rowle is equally silent, save for a small huff.

"Because it looked to me," Moody starts, glaring between them, "like you two and those Neanderthals got into a bit of a tussle, eh? Four-on-one. Would that be correct?"

Kim masks her surprise, figuring he hadn't seen anything but the aftermath.

After more silence, Moody sighs gruffly. "Rowle, we don't tolerate bullying here. You and the other three'll be serving detention with me for a week—today and tomorrow to start. I'll see you in the new year to complete the rest."

Rowle splutters. "Professor, she hit us just as well—"

"After repeated provocation," Moody interjects, eyes flashing in warning. "Don't mistake me for a fool, girl. My hearing's just as good as it's ever been." He pauses, staring her down. "Count yourself lucky I don't give you double the time for that cowardly stunt you pulled."

He pushes off the door and starts limping past them towards the desk at the front of the classroom, muttering, "Back turned, _I'll_ say."

That shuts Rowle up, and once arrived at the desk, he sits behind it and looks to Kim. "Hart, you won't be getting detention. I can't punish you for defending yourself. But this'll be your one and only warning: you can't go around jinxing other students, no matter what rubbish they spew at you. Hear me?"

"Yes, Professor," Kim mutters, jaw flexing repeatedly at the pain in her knee.

He nods. "Good." Staring between them for a moment, he waves his wand to start a quill writing out a handful of notes by magic, then jerks his head at Rowle. "And don't you dare think that me giving Hart a warning means you're safe to keep this nonsense going. I hear _one_ word about this happening again, and your detentions get compounded. That goes for any other kid you like pester to pass the time. Relay that to your friends."

Rowle inclines her head. "Sir."

Moody grunts. "Get the others in here, please."

With another small huff, Rowle pushes off the desk and passes by Kim, not sparing her another glance. Wrenching the door open, she mumbles to the Slytherin boys and they lumber in, all staring Kim down as they do.

"You've nobody to blame for this but your own damn selves," Moody says, getting up from the desk and making his way back over. "You four start detention with me this evening. I'll see you tomorrow night as well, then the first three days of the new term."

Warrington makes an affronted noise, eyes widening. "Professor—" he gestures to his other friend, "we didn't even _say_ anything to her!"

Moody flashes a wild-looking grimace. "Didn't hear any protest either. You stood at their backs, which makes you an accomplice." He looks between the three boys, voice dropping into something like a snarl as he leans in closer, "You think harassing a kid two years your junior makes you big men? Eh?"

He scoffs and waves his wand at the desk, where four parchment notes roll up and begin to travel through the air towards them. Passing them out, he hums. "Take these to Professor Snape—I'll know if he got them. You four are dismissed. Hart, stay."

They leave the classroom and shut the door, Kim keeping her eyes fixed on the blackboard, gripping at her forearm painfully to focus on not crying. Professor Moody turns away and she quickly swipes at the bottom of her eyes, frustrated with herself, and Ptero runs his tail along the nape of her neck.

It calms her down a little.

Moody limps a few paces towards the front of the classroom and turns around to face her again, leaning up against a desk and leaving some space between them. "You okay?" he asks, voice much kinder.

"Yes, sir," Kim replies quietly.

He stares at her, magical eye oddly still, and sighs. "Should have that leg looked at. It's bleeding on my floor."

Surprised, Kim cranes her head down. And he's right—there's already a shining outline of blood on the stone floor around her trainer, thicker on the outside of her foot. "Ah, sorry."

Moody chuckles lightly. "Don't apologise. You're a tough kid, but why don't we get you to the Matron?"

Kim frowns, wondering how on earth she's going to make it there. "Er, yeah."

He gestures to her knee. "Familiar with a splinting spell?"

"Yeah, my mum's a Healer."

And as he nods, his eyes flash with something that might just be genuine warmth, more than what she's seen from him before. "Right. You know it's going to hurt, then. I'm going to splint it to get you over there, that all right?"

Kim hesitates and perches a bit on the desk, moving her robes out of the way. And her stomach flips a little at seeing the actual state of her leg—her trousers are dark with blood from her knee all the way down to her trainer, and there's a deep gash, cleanly sliced through the fabric.

"Okay?"

She hums. "Okay."

Still not making to get too close to her, Moody raises his wand. " _Ferula_."

And the pain is... something, most definitely. She watches as a stiff splint appears around her leg, encasing it on all sides except the front, followed by a bandage that winds itself around quickly by magic, right over her trousers.

With another wave of his wand, Moody conjures a crutch and hands it to her, which she accepts with quiet thanks. "So we can match while walking over there, eh?" he quips, giving her a lopsided grin and waving his own gnarled cane as he makes to lead the way out of the classroom.

Kim gets up and leans on the crutch, her leg more supported with the splint, and makes a disagreeing noise. "Professor, you don't have to walk me—"

"Hart," he interjects, turning around in the doorway, "this isn't an honour guard. You clearly can handle yourself well enough. It's just courtesy."

After a few moments Kim inclines her head and follows him out into the empty corridor, everyone by now down at lunch. Sighing a bit at not having to look tough for anyone, she starts limping next to Professor Moody, him slowing his usual rapid pace.

"As your Defense teacher, I've got to say—" he starts, walking stick making a hollow _clunk_ sound as he walks, "nice Shield Charm, there. Suffice to guess that our lesson the other day wasn't your first rodeo, eh?"

Kim blinks. "Er, no? Will that hurt my grade?"

Moody chuckles. "Course not. Knowing it already is _smart_ … especially if you've had to deal with tossers accosting you." She stifles her surprise at Moody talking so candidly and shrugs her response, and he sighs. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry about them. Respect that you kept your mouth shut, but you don't owe 'em nothing."

Kim sighs as they turn into a staircase. "Thanks, sir."

"Form still needs work, though," he quips. "Saw that hand come up."

And, despite still feeling like rubbish, Kim can't help but laugh a little. "If I say it was actually for balance, and therefore _entirely_ in line with what you said in class, does that mean my form was perfect otherwise?"

Moody looks over at her, grinning his crooked smile. "I suppose it does."

.

"WHERE IS SHE?" Jason roars, face flushed and contorted with rage, shoving an oafish Slytherin boy into the wall of the Entrance Hall by the front of his robes.

"Stuffed in a cupboard, Scott," the boy answers, smirking. "Though I'm sure _you'd_ like to stuff—"

 _WHAM_.

Jason punches him right in the stomach.

"Fucking wanker," the boy grumbles, coughing once. "I dunno, innit? Moody broke it up."

"We know she got hurt," Trini growls, stepping forward threateningly with her wand held at her side. "Everyone's been talking."

"Not our fault she can't take a joke. Stupid bitch—"

Zack punches him square across the face, eyes alight with anger, and the boy groans. To their right, the two other Slytherins make to step forward, but Tommy, Rose, and Rocky continue to bar them, holding their place with wands raised.

"It'd be wise to shut the fuck up," Zack mutters, shaking his hand out once. Turning to Trini and Billy, he sighs. "I'm gonna check the hospital wing."

Trini nods. "I'll come with."

Jason shoves the Slytherin boy again, pushing him away and towards the busy Great Hall; Rose, Tommy, and Rocky move aside to let him pass.

"Watch your back, Scott," one of the other boys grumbles.

"Oh, don't worry," Trini snaps, eyes flashing. "Once we figure out which of you hit her, we'll find _you_."

"Piss off," Jason growls, flexing his wand arm and taking a couple steps towards them. "I don't have time for this—"

Rose steps into Jason, putting a steady hand on his chest. "Not worth it." She half turns to the Slytherins and makes a shooing motion. "Do your posturing somewhere else, won't you?"

They throw her a glare and make their way back into the Great Hall, Trini exhaling as they do.

"I'm gonna check her spots in the dungeons," Jason says, still red in the face and seething.

"Same," Tommy says, and when Jason goes to wave her off, she shakes her head. "Last thing you need is to run into other Slytherins down there."

"I can deal with it, Tom," Jason mutters, turning away and beginning to stride across the Entrance Hall.

Tommy huffs, taking off after him. As she does, a parchment airplane comes soaring down the marble staircase; Trini watches it float across the Entrance Hall, finding its mark by pinging Jason in the temple.

It falls to the floor and he stops in his tracks, bringing his right hand up to rub at the spot as he kneels down.

Unfolding it, Jason's brow furrows. "'Hart's in the hospital wing,'" he reads aloud, as Tommy peers over his shoulder. "'She's okay. Might fancy some company.'"

"It's from Moody," he explains after a moment, then immediately changes direction, hurrying towards the marble staircase and pocketing the note.

Rose hums and hesitates before gripping Trini's forearm. "Best we don't crowd her. She's not going to want a fuss."

Rocky nods his agreement. "We'll see you later, okay? Give her our love."

Trini gives the both of them a small smile. "Thanks for the back-up."

They wave at her as she, Zack, and Billy make to follow Jason and Tommy, speeding up the stairs to catch up.

The five of them wind their way up through the castle, Jason leading. He takes them through a staggering amount of shortcuts and passages, some of which Trini had no idea were even there.

In his haste, he seems to move on autopilot until he wrenches open a door, only to be met with solid wall. Blinking rapidly, he huffs, and Zack puts a gentle hand on his forearm.

"Isn't Friday, mate," Zack mutters, tugging Jason away and towards one of the main side staircases instead.

It's not much longer before they're walking down the drafty, deserted corridor that leads to the hospital wing.

With the rest of the school down at lunch it's quiet, their steps echoing off the sun-streaked floor as they pass window after window on their right: large, frosted, and beckoning them out into the snowy grounds.

It's a beautiful day, really, and Trini's eyes fall on the Quidditch pitch, sparkling in the sun, before roaming over to the dark of the Durmstrang ship set against the icy Black Lake, blanketed in a crisp layer of snow.

Jason and Tommy are walking the quickest, leading the way as they burst through the doors. Trini, Zack, and Billy follow on, and they're met with a completely empty hospital wing, save for two occupied bays.

Kim is situated in a bed to their right, propped up with pillows and laughing quietly, with a small tray of sandwiches floating just above her waist. Sat on the empty bed beside her is Professor Moody, himself with a plate and a sandwich, arms crossed and chatting away.

Upon their not-so-inconspicuous arrival, Kim looks up and smiles in a way that Trini has rarely seen; it's bright, beaming, and entirely unbridled. "Hey, guys." She glances to Moody then with glassy eyes, jokingly accusatory. "You were supposed to tell them I was fine, not that I was _here_."

Moody chuckles. "I did, kid. Included the whereabouts because if I was them, I'd like to know."

"Er, thanks, sir," Jason says, crossing the ward to approach Kim's bed. He sticks his hand out and Moody kind of stares at him for a moment, puzzled, before taking it.

"Part of the job," Moody mutters, getting up off the bed and waving his wand to vanish his plate.

And they all certainly know that he didn't have to stay, but he kept Kim from having to be here by herself. Despite Trini's negative opinions of him after their first Defense lesson, he's... grown on her a bit.

Staying with Kim strikes her as an unexpected kindness.

Moody sends a small smile at Kim as he starts to make his way out. "See you, Hart. Try to keep out of trouble."

Kim smiles back. "I'll try!" She pauses as Tommy comes over and kisses her forehead. "Thanks for keeping me company, Professor."

"Of course," he returns, opening the door that leads back out into the corridor. "Scott, Taylor, see you in class. Don't be late."

"Yes sir," Zack replies, giving him a little salute. Jason nods, and Moody exits.

Trini walks up to the side of the bed as Jason and Tommy surround Kim, Jason taking her hand in his and kissing her palm. "What happened?"

"Is it your leg then?" Tommy asks, frowning at Kim's left knee, which is bandaged and elevated by magic.

Kim chuckles. "I'm okay," she mutters, sighing contentedly with all of them around her. "Just a bit of a scuffle. I'd prefer we don't make a big deal."

Trini shakes her head. "We had no idea where you were. Sorry it took so long to find you."

Kim meets her eyes. "It's okay, Trin. I'm fine, really."

"We're gonna meet you outside of your classes from now on," Zack says, in a tone much more serious than his usual. "Or Rose'll walk you to us." He scoffs, brow furrowing. "Can't go two steps without idiots harassing you."

"Guys, it's—" Kim starts, tone frustrated.

"Kimberly," Billy interjects, giving her a sad smile. "Humour us."

After a few moments Kim sighs heavily. "I really don't need a guard with me at all times."

"Like hell you don't," Jason mutters, running a hand over the side of his face.

"We _know_ you can take care of yourself," Tommy says, voice a gentle sing-song. "But if people are gonna be pricks, we'd feel better if a few of us are around in some capacity."

Once Trini steps a bit closer to the hospital bed Kim meets her eyes again. Trini searches them, putting a hand on her forearm. "Are you alright, though?" she asks quietly, and Kim seems to understand what she's asking without her having to say it explicitly.

Kim sighs, hesitating. "I mean, no? But I dealt with it."

Madam Pomfrey comes sailing towards them from her office at the back of the ward, noting all of them there with a stern look. "You lot should be getting to class, now. Kimberly dear, please finish up your lunch so we can get that potion down."

"How long does she have to stay here, ma'am?" Billy asks, watching Madam Pomfrey as she shoos Jason and Tommy aside to put a gentle hand on Kim's leg.

"Reckon just a few hours...?" Kim mutters.

Madam Pomfrey nods her agreement. "Have to stay off it while the ligament heals," she says, twitching her wand to raise Kim's leg a bit higher and bringing a couple pillows soaring over to prop it up manually. "No fractures, so it shouldn't be long."

"So they cut you?" Trini murmurs, fresh rage roiling in her stomach.

"The students responsible will be disciplined, Miss Gomez," Madam Pomfrey says curtly, uncorking a phial and handing it to Kim. "Drink up. You five, please get going."

"If I get more credit, my back was turned," Kim mumbles, knocking the potion back and making a tiny displeased face. And Trini knows for a fact that it doesn't taste that bad, but Kim's expression causes her heart to flip around in her chest. It's somehow endearing.

_Calm, Gay._

"I've a double free period next," Billy says, voice steady. Clearly expecting an argument.

Madam Pomfrey regards him for a moment, as if determining if he's telling the truth. "Alright, then you may stay if you wish," she replies, making a shooing motion. "The rest of you — off you go."

Kim's eyelids immediately get heavier with help of the potion, and she smiles lazily. "Let's hope I'm not here again next week."

Madam Pomfrey scoffs good-naturedly. "Two weeks in a row is _indeed_ a trend."

Trini squeezes Kim's hand and starts to back up, and Zack scoots around to kiss her forehead. "We'll be back after class," she says quietly, and Kim smiles up at her.

"You really don't have'to," Kim mumbles, snuggling her head back into her pillow. "'m fine, you know."

"We know," Zack says quietly, eyes lingering on her before backing up as well. Jason kisses her hand again, and Tommy pecks her on the cheek.

Trini leads the way out of the hospital wing, anger rising to a boil inside of her in seconds, and she grits her teeth as she walks back out into the corridor.

Once the door closes, Jason voices a similar feeling. "I'm going to _rip_ them limb from limb."

Tommy sighs. "I'll talk to some people. We'll get them."

Zack runs a hand through his hair, shaking his head. "This is where B would tell us not to get in trouble, I reckon."

"He'll understand," Trini mutters, crossing her arms as they walk.

"Yeah," Zack says, putting a hand on her shoulder. "This can't keep going on."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'mount everest' by labrinth.
> 
> \---
> 
> so, hello everyone! bit of a heavier chapter today. kim was due for an altercation, and having the other kids at her back now (though not in those specific moments) is DIFFERENT.
> 
> reminder that moody can SEE THROUGH WALLS with his magical eye. so though kim figured he didn't see anything but the aftermath of the fight, he saw it ALL.
> 
> again. moody's also... complicated. I'm very much aware that he's a Really Bad Dude in disguise, but remember the thing about slytherins, or the thing about some people in general — if you're part of THEIR people, there's an entirely different set of rules. that is to say, moody (or barty crouch jr, in this case) knows kim's dad. so she, to him, is his _people_. he's also a good teacher, though it kind of pains me to say that. but there is a protectiveness there that he has for her, and again, we will EXPLORE THAT LATER VIA SOME STUFF KIM'S MUM TELLS US LATER ON!
> 
> NOW! the kids roughing up that slytherin upper-year to find out where kim is... that's something new. we haven't seen them all band together as of yet, but they're at that point in their friendship as a group. they've been spending SO much time together, and though kim hasn't had one of these bullying situations (at least to this degree) in some months, it's still very much a thing. remember how jason and zack reacted a few months ago, when those spells went off in the corridor outside of the potions classroom. zack was ready to throw down for kim then, and he certainly is now.
> 
> mind, kim's going to have complicated feelings when it comes to all of this. she has a thing about looking 'weak', and though we all know that being bullied doesn't make you weak, or lesser, kim DOES NOT like looking vulnerable. for zack and trini to see the aftermath of this is... embarrassing for her. she does NOT like it, and we will explore that further as we see the fallout of all this.
> 
> also! the last time we saw a proper confrontation with bullies, it was in a flashback, from when kim and jason (and tommy, by extension) still weren't talking. kim still had friends but a VERY small amount. we've seen rose defend her on multiple occasions in multiple ways, but it's much different when you have numbers on your side. jason and the rest of the kids are going to try and put a stop to all of this next chapter, or at least make the assholes responsible for bothering kim understand that she has people at her back. and there are more than even she knows.
> 
> but this isn't the only group of idiots who've been bullying kim, remember. she's been blacklisted by a lot of people in slytherin house. this is a start.
> 
> you might recognise a couple of the names here from canon—warrington and rowle. warrington, like kim said, played in the IHC final between slytherin and gryffindor last year as a fill-in. him and montague become a pair of annoyances down the line for harry and co, and also bullied billy in the library last year. trini jinxed them in response.
> 
> rowle is the daughter of thorfinn rowle, one of the death eaters who invades the castle at the end of year 6. presently, he's still in azkaban.
> 
> as a note — kim's dad isn't in azkaban. but that line about being 'ashamed' of him that rowle spits at kim is targeted at her sort of... newfound morality. she's no longer subscribing to the blood status stuff, and by extension, obviously doesn't approve of her father and his death eater membership.
> 
> RE jason opening a door to be met with a solid wall — though the grand staircase MOVES as if on swivels in the movies, there's not actually any specific mention of it doing that in the books. what JKR DOES say is that the staircases found throughout the castle literally move sometimes, only to be found on certain days etc. it's not often, but it happens. so that's what zack was saying, when jason tried to take that particular shortcut. it's thursday, and it only appears on fridays.
> 
> \---
> 
> but yes. next chapter we begin with some kim flashbacks, which are bound to happen when she's in the throes of this type of mental funk after a confrontation. if something crappy occurs, it can shake your carefully crafted neutral mindset, you know? especially for someone like kim, who is most certainly canonically depressed in the 2017 film, and is in this story as well.
> 
> I will note that the upcoming flashbacks may be heavy for some, cause we get a glimpse into kim's mind the night she nearly took her own life. it's a part of her story and is directly related to all of this bullying stuff, so that's where her train of thought goes. it keeps quite vague, but I'll put a trigger warning up.
> 
> thanks for reading, all. again, next couple chapters are going to be heavy like this one, until we get back to our regularly scheduled slowburn programming. 
> 
> I appreciate you all to the moon and back! take care of yourselves.


	37. Sky Full Of Song

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***NOTE: trigger warning for a panic attack and suicidal ideation. specifically the flashbacks to kim on the night she nearly ended her own life—both begin with 'EIGHT MONTHS AGO'. all of it stays quite vague, mind, and we don't actually _see_ anything because she's stopped before she can make her way out of the castle. but it might be triggering, so please take care of yourselves. (if you'd rather not read it and would like a summary, please go ahead and message me on [tumblr](https://numberfiveisalive.tumblr.com/) and I'd be happy to provide one.)
> 
> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/64fzn2ewOdSH57wrxTPGov?si=H51U6pFhQTyXmqTy4pHNJg). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

**EIGHT MONTHS AGO**

Kim can't breathe.

She clutches at her robes, curled in the fetal position on the floor of the dungeon caretaker's cupboard, trying to inhale but only managing staccato gasps, no room for air with the sobs wracking her chest. Snarling, forehead to the cold stone floor, eyes screwed shut.

Sharp pain shoots from her bloody knuckles through the stiff bones of her hand when she clenches her fist; she hits the floor with the side of her palm once, twice, three times, smearing the blood already there—

_Is this who you are? It is, isn't it?_

No, no, no. Things were getting better—

Making an effort to breathe through her nose, all Kim registers is the smell of ancient, smoldering wood mixing with musty dungeon. Above her head is a series of spots where the empty wooden cubby shelves have been blasted away—

 _BLAM_.

She throws her arms over her head protectively, her magic flaring and _exploding_ again like a live wire flailing about in a storm. Splintered, blackened pieces of smoking wood shelving fall around her.

"Fuck," she spits, trying to get control of herself. Her whole body is shaking.

But she can't calm herself down—

.

**TEN MINUTES EARLIER**

"It wasn't your secret to tell," Kim says lowly.

Ty Fleming sneers back at her, arms crossed. "Wasn't yours to either, but that's how shit goes, innit? You fucked up, K."

Montague stands a couple feet away, looking between them rapidly, clearly conflicted. He told Ty—one of his best friends—about Amanda last night, right after Kim spilled the beans about her Mermish heritage.

By noon today, their entire House seemed to know the big secret, too.

"Better watch how you fucking speak to me," Kim snarls, voice deadly even. Eyes flashing.

"You're not top dog anymore," Ty retorts quietly, taking a menacing step closer to her.

Kim stands her ground. "Maybe not—" 

And without warning, she pulls her hand back and punches him square in the mouth. He staggers back and collapses to the floor on his knees, holding his face and groaning, hot blood gushing out between his fingers.

Kim grits her teeth at the pain in her hand, determined to stay level. "But I can still put you in _your_ place, you piece of shit," she finishes, glaring down at him.

She throws an icy look around at the small crowd gathered in the common room around them, daring any of Ty's friends to make a move. When nobody does, she turns around in the most dignified way she can manage, trying to keep up composure, and walks out into the dungeons alone.

.

**PRESENT DAY**

When Kim's released from the hospital wing around suppertime she insists on going back to her common room instead of the Great Hall, giving the others a solid excuse of wanting to sleep.

Tommy walks her downstairs and Kim promptly excuses herself, averting her eyes from the handful of people present as she limps with her crutch towards the girls dormitories.

Arriving at her dorm, she finds it empty. Her roommates are likely still up at supper.

With a heavy sigh, Kim puts Ptero in his enclosure and carefully gets into her pajamas.

She sits on her bed, the room dark save for the soft green light coming from the floor-to-ceiling windows. Staring at her hands, she stays like that for some time, contemplating.

And after a few futile attempts at sleep through the night, Kim leaves her dormitory at around four o'clock in the morning, walking carefully on her repaired leg with use of her crutch. Madam Pomfrey said she need only use it for a day, but Kim's been itching to get out to the lake.

She makes her way up through the castle, hitching her rucksack up on her shoulder and feeling her gramophone slide around a bit inside the magically-expanded space.

The emptiness of the corridors is comforting, given she figures that walking around in the coming days will be rougher than usual, what with the expected _looks_ from people.

It's stupid how fast gossip travels in a castle full of teenagers.

Kim sighs.

Her mind especially has been in a darker place today, which is no surprise; she hasn't experienced a proper physical altercation in some months, not since returning to Hogwarts in September.

And harassment from Amanda and her friends is certainly expected; deserved, really. But the random idiots bullying her is different. Having Zack and Trini there in the hospital wing earlier was also... new, and not something she entirely liked.

It was kind of them, and she's incredibly grateful for their concern. After hoping for a bit of a fresh start, though, having them around to see her that _weak_ and pathetic made her feel like crawling into a hole and staying there.

Kim is better than she used to be at staving the fleeting negative thoughts off, not as suggestible when her mind goes to darker places. But in the face of a very present and stark reminder that people still hate her, it's more difficult.

And it's strange, how everything can be going just fine one day and then shift into horribly wrong the next.

Turning into Gregory the Smarmy's corridor, he looks up like he always does. Gives her a happy little wave. He's got a small novel in hand and seems to have been reading by the light of the flickering torch next to him.

His eyes flit down to her leg, clearly noting the crutch, and he frowns. "Everything okay, Kim?"

She limps up to him and nods once, trying to smile but certain it doesn't reach her eyes. "Yeah, just a little injury," she answers, casually deflecting. "How's your night?"

Gregory tilts his head at his book. "Lovely." He pauses, regarding her with a calculating gaze. "But truly — if you're hurt, is a swim the best idea?"

Kim gives him the look that she usually employs to keep her mum from pestering. "I can handle it."

He throws his hands up, though there's something else in his eyes that she can't place. "Why don't you just spend time with me instead?"

She hums, brow furrowing slightly. Hesitating for a few moments as her dismissive air turns to curiosity; he's rarely so insistent.

"I, er... don't have any interesting thoughts to share with you, though," she mutters, actively trying not to be a prick. "My brain isn't quite working right now."

Gregory tilts his head. "As much as I enjoy our conversations, you're not required to talk if you don't want to."

_Huh. This is new._

Kim watches him carefully for a few moments. "You've never stopped me before."

There's a pronounced pause, and whatever pretense he'd been holding up seems to fall away all at once. His face changes to something both incredibly warm and somberly serious.

"I _have_."

.

**EIGHT MONTHS AGO**

It's a quarter hour or so past curfew when Kim leaves the safety of her caretaker's cupboard. In somewhat of a daze, she walks down the chilly dungeon corridor with a hollowness in her chest.

Her right hand hangs limply at her side, still caked in dried blood—it throbs at her quietly but she's unable to do much, having left her rucksack and tiny Healers kit back in her dorm.

Nor would she care to do anything about it, beyond what she's managed already: one of her socks is haphazardly tied around her knuckles to stop the deep, tooth-shaped cut from dripping onto the floor as she makes her way upstairs.

And Ptero is asleep in his terrarium, warm and safe. She won't be going back to her room tonight, not with Amanda sleeping a few beds away.

_It's probably better like this._

Her mum is great with animals, after all. Kim's not worried about what will become of him.

She has no concept of how much time it takes for her to get up to the fifth floor of the castle, but she's soon padding through the low light towards the passage out into the grounds that Gregory the Smarmy guards.

Nobody will find her until tomorrow. Or even longer, maybe.

She sighs.

And Gregory looks up as she turns the corner, giving her a small smile. As she gets closer, though, it seems to flicker on his face.

"Evening, Kim," he greets quietly, voice smooth as ever. "No gramophone tonight?"

Kim shakes her head and runs her fingers through her long hair, adjusting it to fall over one shoulder. When his stone eyes flick down to her crudely-wrapped hand, she averts her gaze and pushes it into the folds of her robes, trying to be inconspicuous. "Wasn't really feeling it."

He nods slowly. "Fair enough." Pauses, seemingly deliberating. "I shall see you later, then. 'Music' will be the password."

Kim hums, only barely hearing him. "Okay."

She steps around him and through the wall, now an illusion, moving as if on autopilot.

Her foot is on the top step of the iron staircase that will take her below and into the passage when his voice sounds from behind her—

"Wait, Kim? Before you go — could you explain something to me?"

Kim closes her eyes for a couple seconds, takes a deep breath in and out.

Turning around, she finds Gregory's head and shoulders are poking through the wall, clearly enthusiastic. The firelight from the wall torch dances across his stone face, so much alive.

"I— What about?"

He hums. "The ending of _The Remains of the Day_. I've only just finished this evening, and I can't seem to fathom how they left it like that."

She finally meets his eyes. "How they left it...?"

"Why didn't Stevens _say_ anything to Miss Kenton?" Gregory urges, tone disbelieving. Ever one to cheer on a love story. "After all that time? I can't wrap my head around it."

Kim's mind already feels like it's underwater.

She hesitates. "I suppose he thought there was no point, right?"

"But after everything! And with possibility still ahead of them?"

"What possibility, though?" she counters softly, eyes on the floor. Her brow twitches. "He messed it up long before. There's no changing something like that."

Gregory shakes his head, stepping fully off his stone base and through the wall, into the passage landing with her. "Surely he could have!" he insists, walking over to the bookcase and bringing his glasses up onto his nose.

He pulls a book and flips it open, movements quick. Kim watches him fondly, a small mote of warmth sparking in her chest then going out as he runs his great stone finger down a page. "She clearly wondered if she made a mistake! There was space to maneuver!"

Kim tips her weight heavily against the iron bannister, coming back to herself slightly with the talking. It's enough lucidity to register how physically exhausted she is, given she hadn't slept a minute last night, either.

Not after outing Amanda like she did.

When Kim doesn't say anything Gregory looks up at her, peering over the glass-less frames of his spectacles. "I do apologise for bothering you with this. But I _must_ know!"

His earnestness is so evident that Kim manages a small, tight smile, and his face brightens further.

"You aren't bothering me. I'm just being..." she mutters, then pauses, trying to compose herself as an uneasy fuzzy lightness ebbs through her, like the prelude to fainting.

Gregory seems to notice, and he hums once. "Are you not feeling well? Would you like to sit down?"

Without waiting for an answer, he snaps his fingers and a _full sofa_ appears right beneath the single wall torch across from the bookcase, complete with a green sleeping bag, multiple blankets, and a soft pillow.

Kim blinks a couple times at the sight, gripping at the cold iron railing with her uninjured hand so hard that her knuckles go white.

Sitting for a bit couldn't hurt, right? Just long enough to explain it to him...?

Something hot and acrid bubbles in the back of her throat at the thought.

 _Coward_.

Kim screws her eyes shut and shakes her head almost drunkenly, arm flexing when her weight sways to the side a bit.

"Just for a few minutes," comes Gregory's worried voice, closer now. "The lake will still be there after you've caught your breath, I assure you."

She opens her eyes and he's only a few feet from her, offering his large mitt of a hand in silent question. After staring at it for a few seconds she takes it gently, finding him strangely warm to the touch, and he guides her over.

Kim's legs do all but give out under her as she sits down on the sofa, swallowing thickly. "Must be getting ill," she mutters, sighing.

He wraps a huge blanket around her with another twitch of his fingers. "I will not nag."

"Lovely," Kim murmurs, curling in on herself and perching her chin on her hands. She shuts her eyes again, desperately willing the world to stop tilting.

There's a pause as he watches her, concern creasing the corners of his eyes. "I will merely... acknowledge aloud the absurdity of swimming in the middle of the night while in such a state."

"That's nagging."

"When did you eat last?" he asks, peering down at her.

" _Greg_ —"

" _Kimberly_ , please."

She doesn't reply, and he clicks his tongue impatiently, muttering something incomprehensible under his breath.

Thirty seconds later there's a soft _clink_ , and Kim opens her eyes to find an end table has appeared a foot away from her, complete with a steaming mug of herbal tea, bowl of soup, and small plate of sandwiches.

Kim tips her head into her hands, hiding the tears that spring to her eyes immediately and threaten to escape.

Because Gregory has been one of her only friends for a year or so now. Here he is doing something caring and considerate, despite her blatant efforts to brush him off.

And that bit of warmth in her chest finally _takes_ ; grows. It's a bit of a... tightness, sure, but it stays, wrapping gently right around her heart.

Kim reaches her uninjured, trembling hand out and takes the teacup, blowing for a moment before bringing it to her lips. It's a cool peppermint with a bit of honey already stirred in, and it glides down her throat, warming all the way down.

"Honestly, I get it," she finally says softly, trying to get out of her head and meet him halfway, like they always do when they talk about books. "About the ending. I was the same way when I finished—when he didn't tell her how he felt I wanted to jump into the story and shake him a bit."

"Exactly," Gregory returns, clearly pleased that she's engaging. "But you seem more understanding now? Shall I expect to feel the same after some time?"

Kim shrugs one shoulder, sipping at the tea again. Trying to allow the memory of the story to fill her mind in order to give him a proper answer. "Not sure if I'm more understanding," she says quietly, pulling the thick blanket tighter around herself. "But I... can see why he didn't act? And because of who he is, I expect it's more a case of inaction rather than the _choice_ not to do something?"

Gregory nods, head tipped to the side slightly. "Are those different?"

As Kim considers, something about the story seems to click in her mind. "I think that's... what becomes apparent at the end, and only after she's gone and he's left there alone: inaction and choosing not to act might come to the same thing, but they're _so_ different. At least in this context."

He watches her, still looking puzzled.

Kim frowns. "Like, his personal life is sort of... one big series of inactions, right?" she continues slowly, trying to phrase. She picks up one of the roast beef sandwiches and bites into it, chewing.

"And it isn't his fault — he's a butler," she mutters after a few moments, humming once. "So he can't get married or he'll lose his job, right. He can't express his feelings because it would compromise his professionalism... so there've always been external constraints that took his agency away? But it gets to the point where he's so used to _not_ having the privilege of choice that he like, assumes inaction by default."

"Even at times when he _does_ have the ability to change things," Gregory says in agreement, nodding wisely as he crosses his arms and leans against the bookcase. "I see."

"Yeah. Again, not his fault," Kim murmurs. "But I figure that's why he didn't say anything to her at the end? He just... didn't even consider that he had the _option_ to." She pauses, grimacing. "I don't know if that's the answer you're looking for."

"It's a perfect explanation," Gregory says, smiling sadly. "Though... I _might_ have to argue that this book does not comply with our 'no sad endings' policy."

Kim manages another small smile. "Can I make a case? Don't want you to think I'm flouting the rules."

Gregory surveys her for a few moments, a gentle playfulness in his eyes. "Granted."

She inclines her head and considers. "I suppose the book ends on what feels like a... beginning to me?"

He hums, still watching her intently.

"I reckon that's what it comes down to," she continues slowly. "We go through so much of his story, learn about everything that was important to him, and it's only at the very end that we understand the title of the book isn't actually _about_ the small bits of time he has left over to himself after long days of work. It's about looking at the remains of the day and realising that there's... forever within those moments. Even after so much is gone."

Kim blinks a few times. "Every day, or every small remaining bit, is something new right? It's only after..." she trails off, frowning.

After a few moments he extends his hand to her; a simple question in the silence, offering the book. She nods and reaches out timidly, arm heavy as iron but extended in the space between them, feeling the firelight warming the crown of her head.

Gregory's smile grows and he steps forward, handing it over then backing up again. Kim murmurs a small word of thanks, flipping to the last few pages. "It's only after he talks to the older butler that everything clicks for both him _and_ us," she says softly, perching the book on her lap. Eyes flying over the words.

She begins to read, "'Perhaps, then, there is something to his advice that I should cease looking back so much, that I should adopt a more positive outlook and try to make the best of what remains of my day.'"

Kim shakes her head slowly, rereading the passage again. "And you saw the note I made in the margin here—that passage is so... lonely? It's so resigned, because he knows so much time is behind him, but then he says, 'After all, what can we ever gain in forever looking back and blaming ourselves if our lives have not turned out quite as we may have wished?'"

She looks up and Gregory and he's staring back at her, still leaning against his bookcase. "I guess I love that," she breathes. "So much of his life has gone by already, but he finally understands in that moment that there's _worth_ in trying to make the remainder count for something. He finally gets to have a real choice for himself, and it's one he never even realised he could make."

Gregory watches her pensively. "I think you may have just helped me grasp it all," he says, voice very soft.

"Y— yeah?" she says quietly, that little spot of warmth growing again in her chest.

And it spreads further, further. Buoying her in deep water, warming against the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'sky full of song' by florence + the machine. a very kim song, here.
> 
> the book greg and kim are discussing in the flashback is ['The Remains of the Day'](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Remains_of_the_Day) by Kazuo Ishiguro. one of my favourites, and kim will re-read it a bit down the line in year 6. the quoted lines are directly from my copy!
> 
> \---
> 
> so, hello there. another heavier one, as I said last time. hope it wasn't too much of a pull down for anyone.
> 
> here, we see our first real look into what the Worst Night was like for kim, immediately post the amanda incident. and I want everyone to remember that I'm not... trying to excuse anything kim did by showing you what her reaction to it was like? this isnt a 'poor kim because she's suffering now after doing something awful' — it's the REALITY for her. she outed amanda, and by the next day everyone in slytherin knew what happened.
> 
> what you didn't see was when kim and amanda had their big confrontation, just before that scene with Ty. it happened in their shared dorm room, which is how kim learned that Ty specifically had spread the word to everyone. that was why they had their own throwdown in the middle of the common room, with everyone around — kim walked out of her dorm in a daze, feeling like the world was crashing down around her, and _saw_ him.
> 
> cause remember, kim gets into moments where she... really doesn't think things through. this is evident day-to-day, but when it comes to BIG situations, it's magnified and can make things so, _so_ much worse. if she's in enough of a whirlwind, things can go very wrong.
> 
> when kim left the common room after punching Ty she took refuge in her caretakers cupboard in the dungeons, which you were introduced to near the start of this story. after the inevitable panic attack she went into a disassociative state, which is _exceedingly_ dangerous for a person who has thoughts of suicide anyway. but with everything else that had just happened, that really would have been... it.
> 
> sigh. this was mentioned back when kim and jason had their talk under the beech tree. but yeah. that's all to say that greg _saved kim's life_ that night, truly. we find out next chapter just how much he suspected in terms of her intentions, and... my gosh. kim's _alive_ because he stopped her, and he did it very carefully. knowing kim well enough by then, he was well aware that a honest confrontation/intervention wasn't going to work. he did it in a casual way, which is _exactly_ what needed to happen.
> 
> that moment where greg offered his hand, too? that was the FIRST time they'd ever touched purposefully. kim finding him warm to the touch was a surprise, because he's made of stone, of course.
> 
> note: if you go back to that chapter where we first introduced the dungeon caretakers cupboard, which is 'when you break', I believe, you'll see that the wooden cubbies are described in places to be 'blasted away' etc. that's because of what happened that night.
> 
> and this is also a bit of a glimpse into what losing control of one's magic actually LOOKS like. in HP canon it's mentioned and alluded to multiple times, mainly in regards to young kids who don't know how to control it yet consciously. but it ALSO happens in moments of extreme stress or emotion in magical people of all ages. some more than others, mind. 
> 
> so those explosions when kim was having her panic attack were a result of her own magic flaring out, as mentioned. I alluded to this a bit when we talked about billy and his meltdowns when he was younger, where he could put others or himself in danger because of his magic doing the same thing.
> 
> this brings us to an interesting character element that kim and billy share. kim's adhd makes emotional regulation VERY VERY difficult—sometimes nigh impossible in certain situations. and billy, as someone who's autistic, has a similar type of deal going on. so they together are MUCH more likely to lose control of their magic as teens/adults than most wizarding folk would be, simply because of just how close magic is tied to emotion. this is a canon thing that I've built out and blended with neuroscience to extrapolate.
> 
> but yes. I know the flashbacks and moving around a bit in the narrative is a little difficult to track, so we won't be doing that often at all. necessary here, though.
> 
> \---
> 
> the next chapter will continue this conversation that kim and greg are having in present day. kim's not nearly in as bad of a spot as she was that night, of course. but he explains what happened from his pov, and we learn some stuff about his backstory. after that, we have a tense confrontation with trini, tommy, the boys, and others versus the slytherins who injured kim.
> 
> hope you all are having a great day/night, and thanks as always for reading. truly. take care!


	38. Satellite Call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***NOTE: trigger warning for discussions of someone dying by suicide in the past. Again, it's not graphic. But this'll be the last of it for some time.
> 
> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/0Jab895fPkyyQdNkMl6nYi?si=_MIl-Wq7T1adDHTJq2faaw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

**PRESENT DAY**

After he's explained, Gregory sighs heavily. "So... as much as I wanted to talk about the book, it wasn't so urgent. I just wanted to keep you under my eye."

Kim considers him for a moment, adjusting herself on her crutch. "Did you know?" she asks, voice barely audible.

He's silent for a few seconds, holding her gaze. "I suspected."

"I didn't realise it was that easy to notice...?"

"It... wasn't. But the look in your eyes that night was familiar to me." He pauses, sighing again. "I once saw it in someone I loved. A long time ago."

Kim pales. "Gods, Greg. I'm so sorry—"

"It is passed," he interjects gently, giving her a small, tight smile. "But I did not act then, and I lost someone dear to me. I was not going to let it happen again."

There's a pause of somber silence between them.

Kim shakes her head slowly. "You know, I thought I was being inconspicuous. Had no idea that you knew what was going on. You didn't... you didn't say anything."

"Sometimes, people need not know your motivations," Gregory says quietly. "That may sound disingenuous, but I could not let you leave the castle that night. If I were to have been forthcoming about my worry, you might have decided to find another way."

He pauses, voice becoming even softer, "I did not know the exact circumstances, of course. And I could not fix your world for you, but I _could_ help you hold your pain back until morning, when even the most dreadful of monsters lose the dark."

Gregory searches her eyes. "The light of day does not make the things that haunt us any less terrifying, but it does allow us to see clearer. It is only in revelation that we can begin to confront what we are afraid of."

Kim lets out a heavy breath. Trying to steady herself. 

"Greg... _thank_ you," she finally whispers, voice thick.

He shakes his head. "I merely kept you busy until we could get you proper help. You are the one who agreed to write your mother that night. That was the first step—I only helped you to your feet so you could take it."

She's silent for another few moments. "I'm... _so_ sorry about the person you loved."

He gives her a sad smile. "The reason I'm here with you in this castle is because of what happened, actually. In a way."

Kim frowns. "What do you mean?"

"I have a statue here because of the potion that brought me fame — do you know it?"

She nods slowly. They haven't learned about it lessons yet, but she looked Gregory up in the library a few years ago. His potion has been deemed _Gregory's Unctuous Unction_ for its effects: making the drinker believe that the person who gives it to them is their best friend.

Gregory inclines his head. "I've been informed since my death that it has some... _smarmy_ connotations these days," he says, giving her a sly smile. "And I don't mind the nickname much, I suppose. But the truth is that my invention of the potion was not nefarious—it was intended for medicinal use." He pauses, regarding her almost timidly. "Would you care to hear about it?"

Kim hums her easy agreement, and he leads her through the wall into the passage landing, where a familiar squishy sofa has appeared against the wall. He gestures to it and she sits, while he conjures another massive seat for himself right beside.

Once they're both situated, him huge and her small, he takes a deep breath in and out. "The person I loved who died by suicide was my brother-in-law. We knew each other all our lives," he begins quietly. "In my time, what he experienced was known simply as melancholy. And though we were close, he was a _stubborn_ bastard..."

Gregory's voice wavers a little and Kim scoots forward on her sofa timidly, taking his great stone hand. He looks down and inclines his head sadly. "He would not _listen_ to me. I tried everything I could think of to help bring him out of it. All to no avail."

"To be sure, I soon came to understand that it... wasn't that he didn't _want_ to listen or get well," he adds softly. "This was the hellish, insidious influence of his ailment, rendering him incapable of doing so. He was trapped in the throes of a terrible apathy that choked his sensibilities."

He pauses, large broad brow twitching. "And I'd come to some professional renown by then, so I was able to bring the best Healers available to the house. But…" he shakes his head, sighing, "though they tried admirably, they could do _nothing_. There was no magic for his disposition beyond cheering spells and tonics, which did not address the deeper issue. They were short-term fixes for a chronic illness."

Kim hums quietly and he continues, "There was one Healer in particular who worked tirelessly with us—a good man who later became a dear friend—but he eventually concluded that my brother could not be helped unless he _himself_ made the decision to try and get well. I... of course argued that he was unable to even arrive there in his mind, what with the haze that clouded it, but the apparent fact remained."

Gregory gestures softly. "Without any other options, I began to work on a potion that might help. I hoped it would grant the power of suggestion— _true_ suggestion, where a person would not only listen to what was being said, but internalise it. I endeavoured to override the flat affect of melancholy, intent to clear it _just_ long enough for a deceptively simple idea to take hold: that all was not lost."

"And I... rapidly became obsessed," he goes on, sighing. "I threw myself into the task and toiled over it in the years that followed, but he worsened all the time. Soon he could not leave his bed, so I moved my lab into the room next door and took the wall away. We spent nearly all day, every day in each others company." His voice cracks, just barely. "Sometimes, he would read tales aloud to me as I worked. When he was awake."

Gregory runs a hand over his head. "And true to form, he would poke fun at me, of course." His voice changes to something a bit higher, carrying a different timbre, "'Dear man, there are tasks that do not have a victory at the end.' Or… he would throw his hands up and say, 'Magic cannot fix everything, Greg.'"

Kim watches with a heavy heart, hearing his impression of this person's voice that he still so clearly remembers well, though it's been _centuries._

And this version of Gregory sitting beside her is not human, per se, but he's imbued with living, breathing memories; he calls to them just as vividly as he surely would have if Kim traveled through time to speak with him when he was alive, all those years ago.

"One night, I'd fallen asleep at my desk and I heard him get up," Gregory continues softly, gaze far away. "He came over to put a hand on my face and said, 'Old friend, another day ends. Sometimes there is no right answer.'"

Gregory hesitates, face twitching. "He told me that he intended to watch the sunset on our porch," he says, then pauses, shaking his head. "And I was _thrilled_ , certainly, given it was rare by that time for him to leave the upper floor at all. So I gathered some of his favourite biscuits and made tea for us."

His voice takes on a strange tone, eyes still glazed over, like he's experiencing the memory where he sits, "It was a chilly evening in the late autumn, so we had our tea with a dram of Scotch and I packed our tobacco pipes. All was peaceful, and we didn't do much talking—he seemed absent, but that was how he had been for some time."

Gregory stops talking for nearly half a minute. Kim cups his warm hand with both of hers, and he sighs. "And I... saw that _look_ in his eyes," he turns to her, "the same one I recognised in yours that night you came to me."

Kim's brow twitches and she lets out a small, deep sigh. Gregory inclines his head, covers her hands with his. "It was certainly familiar—again, as if he wasn't entirely present—yet coupled with this... novel resolve, too. Nearly relief. But he was there with me, awake and talking: sitting outside, breathing in the misty dusk..."

His words begin to come out quicker, just above a whisper, "I say, to this day I do not know what I could have done? I've tried and _tried_ with a fury to come up with a solution, but hindsight has not illuminated it whatsoever. Though perhaps—" he moves to grip at his own forearm tightly, voice wavering as a note of defeated levity spins into it, "perhaps I should have tied him to a post in the house! Or held him tightly, so he could not walk out into the night—"

Kim makes a small noise of disagreement. Breathes, "You did what you could—"

"Maybe," he says softly. "But the fact remains that I did not stop it."

Gregory pauses, shutting his eyes heavily then opening them again. His voice comes out barely audible when he continues, "I awoke out there in my rocking chair a couple hours later, with both of our blankets wrapped around me. By then he was gone."

Kim wipes at her teary eyes, chest tight.

"And I was so _close_ ," he whispers, like he's telling her a secret. "Before then, I'd managed to arrive at a cheering potion that was nigh euphoric. It was leagues more powerful than anything that existed in my time, and potent enough to properly lift the haze of his melancholy for a short while."

Gregory shakes his head, eyes widening a little. "But my urges and suggestions would _still_ not take. The disease was rooted far deeper in his mind than I ever imagined, and I couldn't administer it to him more than a handful of times, of course. I'd surmised that a solution of that potency would be highly addictive, and had no desire to continually test unproven potions on him. But... I knew I was on the right track."

There's a long pause.

"I finished the potion a few months after he died," he breathes, sighing again. "It was only after I sought the help of scientists and philosophers who studied the human condition that I came to a breakthrough—they told me that ideas and advice take surer root in one's mind if they come from a person sincerely cared for. This seems a simple fact, but I attempted to apply it to the potion itself, and soon found the key to it all was making it activate the parts of the brain that govern human connection. Love."

He hums. "And you know that love cannot be truly replicated by magic, of course, but I discovered that the trust and fondness that one holds for a true friend _can_ be, if only for a short time."

Kim nods, still holding his hand.

"With that knowledge, I worked to add an element which would specifically target that particular type of fraternity: the feeling brought about by sincere, true contact. It is... one of the most fundamental elements of humanity, that social instinct—it's the reason we have survived as a species for so long."

Gregory squeezes Kim's hand very gently and gives her a small smile, which she returns.

"So — my finished potion mimics a suggestion coming from a best friend, yes," he explains quietly, inclining his head, "but it's paired with the feeling of being at the... height of the best day of one's life. You would agree to anything, _do_ anything when someone you loved so dearly was next to you, with no melancholic apathy dampening the ability to experience those emotions in the first place. It was not one or the other that I needed, but a _marriage_ of the two concepts."

"When the potion was complete, I contacted the Healer I had worked with before and began testing it on myself under his supervision. I did not suffer from melancholy, though, so it was difficult to know if it was an effective treatment." He makes a vague gesture. "But I am an adept Potioneer, and he was a truly good man who wanted to help. When we were certain it was safe for others to consume, he began administering it to patients."

Gregory shakes his head, another soft smile breaking through the sadness. "And it… _worked_ —a young woman in our town was brought out of her melancholy after a single dose! She lived for decades afterward and would send me baskets of baked goods during the holidays."

Kim smiles, wiping at the tears that have begun to escape her eyes again. He returns it, then continues, "With the help of my Healer friend, I supplied others in his field with the potion. Eventually we grew more ambitious, dreaming it could be used by both magical and muggle Healers across the country..."

He pauses for a few seconds, the smile slowly fading from his face. "Forgive me, Kim, but I hope it's alright to stop there for the moment. Revisiting these memories is... taxing."

"It's more than alright," Kim whispers.

He sighs. "If it's agreeable, I will gladly tell you the rest of the story another time, if you would like to hear it."

Kim nods kindly. "I'm sorry it's so hard, Greg. I'd definitely like to hear the rest of it one day, whenever you feel up to telling me."

He gives her a small smile. "Truly, it's quite the tale."

"Thank you for sharing with me."

There's silence between them before he squeezes her hand again; very softly, careful not to hurt her. "Again, the reason I'm telling you this is all to say that yes, I have effectively kept you here once before. I am... determined to do things better."

Kim nods, not speaking. Considering his words with her throat still thick from the tears.

"Will you sit with me now?" he asks quietly.

"I'm not in that bad of a place, I promise."

"Perhaps not, but I would prefer if you're not alone with this for the next while. I am excellent company."

Kim chuckles. "And modest, too!"

He smiles down at her, stone eyes somehow shining in the firelight.

.

The next day, they leave History of Magic and go through break tense, with Kim using her crutch to get around.

And Trini watches Kim hobble away with Rose in the direction of the library for their free period, none the wiser to their plans, before making her way upstairs with Jason, Zack, and Billy to the third floor of the castle, a few minutes to spare before the start of their next class.

It's not a whole lot of time, but they figure being a bit tardy is okay once and awhile.

Turning a corner into their intended corridor, they find the entirety of the Hufflepuff Quidditch team waiting as planned, along with Tommy and nearly ten of her friends.

Trini lets out a breath.

Kim's friends Terence and Adrian are there, too, with two more upper-years Trini recognises from the Slytherin Quidditch team: Miles Bletchley, their lanky Keeper, and Hakan Urqu, a reserve Chaser who's built like a nightclub bouncer.

With Trini's roommates, Jason and Zack's Gryffindor friends, and Billy's roommates following behind them, they all converge in the busy corridor, other students making their way in various directions and unaware of their intentions, for the moment.

Cedric gives Trini a tight smile. She returns it, and they loiter for a couple minutes before their target group arrives: the boy Jason and Zack roughed up yesterday, as well as Warrington and four more upper-year Slytherins.

But with more than twenty people on their side, Trini isn't worried.

"Oi, Vekar!" Cedric calls, voice clipped but carrying.

One of the boys, who carries himself like he's made of money, narrows his eyes at Cedric. "What, Golden Boy? My shirt untucked?"

And Cedric, who Trini is so used to being easygoing and kind, has his jaw set in a no-bullshit way as he steps forward. "You accosted a friend of mine yesterday."

One of the Slytherin girls, a tall platinum blonde with a pretty face, sneers. "And? Mind your own business, Diggory."

"It's my business when you're harassing other students," Cedric presses, closing the space between their groups as other people in the corridor take notice. "Especially kids in the younger years. Got too much free time or something?"

Vekar scoffs. "Just a bit of fun," he replies, drawing his wand out of his sleeve slowly. "Seems you're the one with the spare time, though." He looks between everyone gathered around, eyeing Jason in particular. "What is this? An ambush?"

The other Slytherins draw their wands too, save for Warrington, who meets Trini's eyes and stares her down.

She glares right back.

"This's us telling you to fuck off and leave her alone," Jason says, voice even and clear, though he's flushed with anger.

"Or what?" one of the boys chirps, stepping forward into the gap of empty space between their two sides. "You gonna Jelly-Legs us, kiddo?"

Jason makes to match his movement, but Zack holds out his arm to bar him.

"Here's something — I'll personally make your life hell," Cedric says, voice thrumming with more ferocity than Trini's ever heard from him. "Which you know I _very_ well can do. Being Golden Boy has its perks."

Tanya gives the Slytherins a curt jerk of her head, all business. "You don't want everyone to get real hostile, now," she croons, voice smooth and stony. Wand held ready at her side.

"Like we're afraid of you lot—"

"How about us?" Terence barks, as Adrian, Miles, and Hakan step up beside him, all four of them taller than Cedric. "We're quite well-liked, innit?" He pauses, eyeing all of them. "Keep up with bothering Kimberly, and we'll make sure you're hexed every _single_ time you walk into the common room."

"Only so much of that a bloke can take," Adrian says, raising his wand proper and pointing it straight at the tall blonde girl. "This isn't about being afraid, it's about being smart. Though I'd sure fancy teaching _you_ not to jinx someone when their back's turned, you sniveling coward."

"Speaking of — targeting a younger kid four-on-one?" Miles spits, gesturing angrily at Warrington in particular. "Not to mention she's the best player we have on the damn _squad_." He pauses, scoffing. "Lumbering twit—"

"I didn't fucking touch her," Warrington growls, just loud enough for it to carry across the neutral space.

"You know right well that watching's the same bloody thing," Hakan says, lip pulling back in a snarl.

Vekar makes to raise his wand to match Adrian's, but one of his friends puts her hand on his forearm, pushing it back down gently and stepping in front of him. "Listen, lads," she drawls, raising her hands up lazily. "We don't want in-House trouble. Isn't how we do things—"

"Oh, it isn't?" Adrian snaps, angrily grabbing at his robes where the Slytherin crest is stitched on. "Because Hart is one of _ours_ , is she not?"

A tense few moments hang in the air between them.

"This is your one and only warning," Terence says, looking between all of the Slytherins. "We hear a bleeding word about any of you harassing her again — hell, you _look_ at her the wrong way, and shit starts getting lairy."

Cedric nods. "Plenty of ways this can go. But I'd rather not be stuck in detention with you lot, so wise up, yeah?"

The group of Slytherins seem almost docile, now, the word of Housemates their age seemingly settling the matter for the moment, like a bucket of water on a crackling fire.

There's another charged pause, each side eyeing the other, and Trini tightens her grip on her wand.

"Fine," says the blonde girl, finally. "We all leave each other be."

A few of her friends nod begrudgingly, and Cedric shifts his weight backwards a little. "Lovely."

With that, the group of Slytherins start to walk past them, a fuming Hakan glaring down at one as he goes by. Trini and the rest watch them travel further down the corridor in silence.

Once they've all disappeared into a classroom, Cedric meets her eyes. "Good here, Small?"

Trini nods. "Thanks." She looks around, sighing heavily. "All of you, truly."

Miles waves her off. "We should've done it ages ago. If they try anything else, we'll get them."

"Should get going though, all," Terence mutters, glancing at his watch and hitching his messenger bag up a bit. "Don't need another tardy." He looks to Jason and Tommy. "Keep in touch if things continue or get worse."

He claps Jason on the shoulder then, muttering something to him that Trini doesn't hear, and Jason grips his forearm in return. With that, everyone starts to split off, most walking towards the Grand Staircase.

"That went better than I expected," Tommy mutters, coming up to stand beside Trini.

Jason grips at the back of his neck. "I _know_ it's good we didn't scrap, but..."

Zack hums as they all start to make their way out of the corridor. "I get you, mate. Sometimes a show of force is all it takes, though.

"Power in numbers," Billy agrees, then looks to his roommates, Koda and Oliver. "Shall we? I don't fancy getting Professor McGonagall angry."

Koda makes a noise of agreement, and the three of them start to speed-walk in the direction of a side stairway.

"See you lot at lunch," Billy calls.

Trini waves then turns around, addressing her own roommates as they begin to walk together, "Thank you guys, honest."

Chip smiles softly. "If she's important to you, then we're there, T."

"Always," Gia says, and Summer nods.

.

Kim limps through the common room entrance later that evening, harbouring a soft relief at term finally being over. She turns left immediately once they're in the main space, stopping with Rose and Tommy at the _Slytherin Spins_ board to peruse it a little.

Leaning absentmindedly on her crutch, Kim hums to herself as she looks over the names of the albums that each of the four boys who run the system have listed as their pick of the week: Damon's got [_Crazysexycool_](https://open.spotify.com/album/5eg56dCpFn32neJak2vk0f?si=HEOixMhdTE2hlkhwTaDvEw) by TLC, Xander's is Pearl Jam's [_Vitalogy_](https://open.spotify.com/album/5pd9B3KQWKshHw4lnsSLNy?si=3OKzMse0T2SZVswJHvWipQ), and Ziggy's had [_Tical_](https://open.spotify.com/album/26RDYvX2sIuiEUhqVPkNaf?si=lS3A5bmSSJevLYT_McwPqg) by Method Man up since the beginning of the month.

Kim chuckles softly under her breath, noting that Cameron's still hasn't changed from Mariah Carey's Christmas [record](https://open.spotify.com/album/61ulfFSmmxMhc2wCdmdMkN?si=rJMHcLSZQBiHlWe4syFZIg). He's had it there since it came out around Halloween.

It's an adorable dedication, given he doesn't celebrate Christmas at all. More of a winter solstice guy, by Kim's understanding, who just so happens to have a deep, downright _giddy_ love of Mariah.

_Understandable, really._

And though Kim knows that she won't get it until the new year, she puts her name down for _Tical._ There are a couple people ahead of her in the queue, but she's been meaning to listen since it was released in mid-November.

Tommy requests the Beatles' [_Live at the BBC_](https://open.spotify.com/album/2EowTulHWqSY6QZfTDf5vW?si=1wOxYvQASeKFahaCJRCZdQ) and the three of them turn to make their way to the girls dormitories, walking slower on account of Kim limping along.

"Yo, K!"

Kim immediately tenses, only to look up and see the two seventh-year Slytherin Beaters, Derrick and Bole, lumbering towards her with purpose. They're both built like vending machines and are quite dense as a general rule.

And their behaviour on the pitch isn't known to be _honourable_ , exactly, but they've never been anything but just north of personally neutral with her. Still, she keeps her guard up as they approach, and it's only after Bole gives her a small, lopsided smile that she deflates a little.

"We, erm, heard what happened," Derrick says, voice slow and thick, like molasses made audible. "Miles gave us the gist." He pauses for a beat, making a small gesture towards her injured leg as his tone shifts into something sharper, a promise of violence, "So if anybody _fucks_ with you again, we want you to tell us, hear?"

Kim blinks rapidly, stunned.

"Our bats're here with us at school," Bole grumbles, giving Kim what she assumes is supposed to be a meaningful look. "Didn't know the Tournament'd be happening none, did we?"

Derrick nods gravely, a small grin pulling at the frown on his lips. "Happy to crack 'em out. You just say who."

"Er..." Kim mutters. "Thanks, guys."

"We mean it, K," Bole grunts, then shakes his head, thick brow knitting together. "Had no clue this shit was happening, eh? Nobody touches you on the pitch without going through us, an' that goes same for school hours. IHC cancelled or not."

Kim feels Tommy and Rose's utter bafflement on either side of her, and she smiles softly. Genuinely. "That's really kind. Didn't know you cared."

Derrick crosses his massive arms and shrugs. "Offer's good for any of them blokes on the team, too," he deadpans, and Bole lights up a bit. "We know you can hex 'em into next week, brain like yours, but we've been meaning to turn Montague and Warrington into jams since last year. The soddin' pricks."

Kim chuckles lightly, inclining her head. "Can't blame you there. Truly, thank you."

They both nod, with Bole looking like he's about to reach out to pat her on the shoulder, but he seems to think better of it. After each of them meet her gaze—with fiery, protective sincerity in their eyes—they back away.

And Kim stands there for a moment before she feels Tommy's hand on her hip, gently steering her towards the dormitories.

Once they've crossed the common room and entered the quiet safety of the hallway, Kim exhales heavily. "That was... unexpected. Word travels fast, I guess."

Tommy hesitates. "I'm sorry about all of this, Kimcam."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'satellite call' by sara bareilles. again, SUCH a kim song.
> 
> that word terence says, 'lairy' is brit slang. meaning messy or violent, in this context. as for the new names—vekar is a villain out of PR canon. he's a fancy, self-obsessed dick. and fun fic fact: hakan urqu is... sort of mentioned in HP book 6, in a similar-ish way that gia's mum is in book 4 (see chapter 3 a/n). it's my build that STAYS WITHIN CANON, but you won't find his exact name anywhere if you go looking. all will be clear when we get there! 
> 
> and you'll recognise miles, derrick, and bole from HP (along with adrian and ter). koda and ollie, billy's rommates, have been mentioned before in passing. koda is from PR, and ollie is in JKRs original forty.
> 
> \---
> 
> so, yes! this is the end of the heavy bits for a little while, at least where the more scary/violent kim stuff is concerned. we'll have a passing amanda encounter in a few weeks time, update-wise. BUT! next chapter is our kids basking in the end of term glow!
> 
> hope you enjoyed that dip into greg's backstory. I know that's not... exactly what most of you are here for, given this is a slowburn love story at its heart. but this world has SUCH depth, both canon and what I've built around it. so I'm GONNA show ya here and there! I'll not apologise for this! I don't make the rules!
> 
> cause greg's extremely important to kim and who she is as a person, as you've seen. didn't want to give you his whole story at once, but he's a very interesting guy. has a whole incredible history that is SO much more intertwined with kim's than either of them realise right now.
> 
> also note: greg didn't 'talk kim out of it' that night, to be clear. he just delayed her long enough to get professional help. the sequence of events'll be explained more later, but him saying 'you were the one who agreed to write your mum' gives an idea — back in chapter 8 the fact that kim's mum maddy came to visit every weekend after the Amanda Incident was mentioned. that grew out of the letter kim sent maddy that night after greg stopped her. & kim didn't tell greg EXACTLY what was up, but you know now that he suspected what it was. he literally sealed off his passage and _walked kim_ to the owlery. maddy got the letter, picked kim up within hours, and took her OUT OF SCHOOL right then and there to go to the hospital for treatment.
> 
> so yes. greg stalled with a question he genuinely had about the book. but those thoughts on the ending? that was ALL from kim. the fact that it related to her at the time was not by gregs design—he was grasping at straws to keep her there with him.
> 
> kim that night was like a tiny boat adrift on a still-looking river that leads to a deadly waterfall. what greg did was throw her a rope from the riverbank, hitting the boat over and over until kim grabbed it. even then, picture someone who is horribly exhausted/ill—there's only so long kim could hold on, right. but greg NEEDED to keep her tethered in one place long enough so that she could survive to the morning.
> 
> but yeah. kim has way more people in her corner than she knows and it's important for her to SEE that. jason tells her offscreen about the show of strength with the big group that they did, and though kim's still dealing with the embarrassment (of sorts) she's touched and grateful, above all.
> 
> and! here's another example of the slytherin loyalty in its purest form with derrick and bole—they see kim as a person who is THEIRS. might not show it with outward displays of affection like, say, adrian or terence, but they consider kim a little sister type of figure. & RE them not knowing about the bullying prior to being told about it, hogwarts is a BIG school. theyre three years above her, after all. they don't interact on the regular.
> 
> now, I'd imagine some of you will be disappointed we didn't have a proper throwdown, and I feel that. I really do. but we're in this for the long haul, lads. THOUGH! as a hint, one of a few... explosions, of sorts, _does_ happen in the next while. and someone who is small and VERY angry might just be the main player in that. give it a few months in-universe time. that is ALL I WILL SAY.
> 
> a little nice note: that confrontation with the bullies had all four houses present on the side defending kim. just a little ping for later on in the story. there is unity in hogwarts after all!
> 
> \---
> 
> as I mentioned, next chapter is some sweet sweet wholesome hangouts. I hope you enjoy it, truly.
> 
> sigh. guys, I seriously can't stop saying just how floored I am by the responses to this story so far. your comments legitimately have made me TEAR UP many times now. it's such a surreal feeling to have people reading this and loving it as much as I do. thank you for your comments, kudos, and readership. I appreciate you so much.
> 
> until next time! take care of yourselves <3


	39. Electric Indigo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/79xbBvSiL94cKEww2amEI4?si=s_Oa7p8ATV-luuvs51hq2Q). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Knight to E5," Trini says, eyes flying over the chessboard, trying to calculate. Her Knight does as it's told, moving to take out Zack's black Pawn with a kick of the horse's back hoof.

They're all sat at the Gryffindor table for lunch, now officially started the winter holiday. The Yule Ball is six days away, set for next Friday, and with term finally over, they have a week in the castle to arse around. Despite the heavy load of homework that all of the fourth-years have been set, Trini can't help but feel relaxed.

Though, to be sure, Zack's beating her currently—much better at chess than she would have guessed—and she's pouty about it.

"I reckon I see what you're trying to do, Crazy Girl," he mutters, voice conspiratorial as he stares at the board with a frown. "Queen to F3." His Queen looks up at him, clearly unimpressed with his choice, and he chuckles at the expression on her tiny face. "Trust me, won't you?"

"She's just angry she doesn't get to whack anyone," Trini quips, then hums once Zack's Queen has moved. "Rook to B6."

"You're running from me!" Zack sing-songs, drumming his fingers on the table.

"I think that was a logical move," Billy says, looking over from where he has a large book propped up against one of the sandwich trays. Leans lightly against Zack's shoulder, peering at the board.

"Eh, I'm _completely_ running from him," Trini admits, smiling softly. "Didn't think you had it in you, Z."

Zack shrugs. "Me and mum play all the time. It's our favourite thing." He pauses. "Knight to G4."

Trini's heart warms at his candor, nodding lightly. "That's cool, mate. Did she get this set for you?"

"Nah. Was my dad's."

Trini keeps her eyes fixed on him, searching his face. He doesn't offer any more information, so she doesn't push; just nods. His jaw flexes as Kim's head, pressed lightly up against Trini's thigh, moves a little in her sleep.

Kim's laying on her back on the bench, and Trini resists the bizarre urge to reach down and run a hand through her hair. Mentally slaps herself.

_None of that._

"Queen to A5," she says quietly, and her Queen darts in, taking a run at Zack's Rook. With a big swoop of her sceptre, she sends it skidding off the board.

Jason yawns from his place next to Billy, halfway through his umpteenth re-read of _Quidditch Through the Ages_. He blindly paws with his spoon into his French onion soup and raises it to his mouth—not realising there's no soup on it at all—then pouts when he makes the discovery.

He seems to decide he needs more tea after this and begins to prepare himself another cup of English Breakfast, looking up at Trini after a moment in silent question.

"Sure, thanks," she mutters. He makes a cup for her, sliding the sugar and milk over once he's done adding them to his own.

Trini blows on her tea lightly, watching the steam swirl above it. She takes a content breath in and lets it out slowly, putting her mug back down on the table and holding it with both hands for a few moments, relishing in the warmth coming off the porcelain.

Then—in a brief stroke of what might be madness—Trini reaches down and starts to run her fingers through Kim's hair gently. Her leg is fully healed, crutch absent, given Madam Pomfrey only required her to use it for a day, but she's sleeping because she had a headache earlier.

So... if Trini can help, she wants to.

Kim nuzzles into her touch immediately, unconsciously, making a little content humming noise in her sleep.

For the next five minutes Trini runs her fingernails along Kim's scalp softly, humming ['My Life'](https://open.spotify.com/track/4ZoBC5MhSEzuknIgAkBaoT?si=IKRDY5C4TeSp1v3UVMSPkA) by Billy Joel while focusing on trying to best Zack, though she has little success. She pauses in her humming only to direct her troops across the board.

"Lovely song," comes Kim's low voice, a barely audible mumble. Trini looks down to see her eyes are still closed, but there's a little smile pulling at her mouth. Clearly half asleep.

Trini smiles without thought and continues to hum as she plays. 

Though she puts up a good fight, her and Zack are done in another ten minutes or so.

Once it's over he smiles and gives her a fist bump. "Good game, T."

And Trini can't help but smile back despite the loss—it's nice, doing this with him. "Thanks for letting me play with you."

Zack scoffs. "Mate, 'course. Great to have—" he raises his voice a little, " _someone_ to play with who won't get bored halfway through." He shoots a playful kind of glare a few feet down the bench at Mackenzie and Will, who both look worse for wear on this fine afternoon, no doubt a result of the supposed _raging_ party Gryffindor held into the early hours of this morning to celebrate end of term.

Mackenzie seems to sense his eyes and looks over, glum face lighting up as she waves at him and Trini like an idiot. After a moment she drops right back into her self-pity wallow, burying her head in the crook of her elbow.

Will pats Mackenzie's shoulder gently and sighs heavily, downing the rest of her coffee in a big gulp then crossing her arms on the table and resting her chin there. She pulls her hijab down over her eyes with a tiny whine, followed by her black baseball cap.

"Hey, I play with you," Jason says, feigning offense as he pulls a face.

"You do," Zack replies, with a twinkle in his eye. "But it's nice having someone with a _brain_ to go up against, see—"

Jason looks aghast for a moment before grinning devilishly, reaching behind Billy and shoving Zack so hard that he goes tipping off the end of the Gryffindor bench onto the floor.

He scoffs loudly and glares up at Jason, _appalled_.

Trini smiles at their antics just as Kim shifts again beside her, letting out a small groan before she opens her eyes proper. Meets Trini's gaze with a whispered, "Hi."

"Morning," Trini breathes.

Kim sits up slow, rolling her neck and blinking adorably at the bright lights of the Great Hall. She leans into Trini, body warm from sleep, and twitches her fingers to bring an empty glass into her hand by magic.

After pouring some pumpkin juice for herself Kim takes a big drink. Sighs contentedly. "You lot still want to go for that walk?"

"Yeah," Jason replies, reaching his arms out over the table and stretching like an overgrown puppy, face screwing up a little before he relaxes, shaking out his shoulders. "I'd like that."

Trini yawns wildly. "I'm gonna have another coffee, but I'll be good after."

"Deal," Kim says, then smiles at her, eyes communicating a kind of uninhibited fondness that Trini's certain isn't... intentional; a carry-over from the sincerity of sleep, not quite faded away with coming to consciousness.

But it catches Trini off-guard like a jab to the gut, and she has to shout at herself internally to avoid blushing, pinching the outside of her thigh discreetly under the table in effort to redirect the energy somewhere.

Kim promptly picks up the coffee pot and fills Trini's nearly empty mug, who sits there, watching her do such a... simple thing. Feeling an unfamiliar feeling stirring in her chest.

It's not in the usual way, either? Not in the manner that she, like any Good Gay, is usually thrown off by Kim. Because she's beautiful, of course—it's impossible not to notice.

No, this feeling of being _struck_ by her is novel, somehow. Like a whisper of something in the distance, a word unfamiliar.

And as Trini sits there watching, she's not sure if she wants to strain her ears to hear, or disregard it completely.

.

The five of them walk out of the castle front doors a short time later, descending the great stone steps into a fresh layer of packing snow—three feet deep or so—that covers the expansive school grounds like icing on a giant cake.

It's a beautiful day, the crisp winter sun proud and bright in the sky above, warm on Kim's face as she tips her head back. Closes her eyes, sighing contentedly.

Aimless and light, they make their way around at an easy pace, eager to chat about anything and everything now that term is done. And as they go Kim inhales in deep, deliberate pulls, finding the chilly air grounding, steadying, freeing as it fills up her lungs. Letting it go in the same slow measure, she altogether feels remarkably better than she has in the past couple days, eyes following her breath as it billows and swirls out into the gentle afternoon.

Because Jason's laughing heartily at something Zack's just said, face screwed up with the happiness of it; a balm to the formerly raw state of Kim's emotions, inflammation soothed with warm honey. Providing a thick sweet comfort against the brisk, clean cold.

It's a few minutes later amidst this particular lightness of being when Kim winds up and launches a snowball into the air, pure delight written all over her face and lighting up her eyes.

Up and away it goes, travelling a shallow arc and landing _perfectly_ , hitting the back of Zack's neck and blasting spectacularly apart on impact.

Zack lets out a scandalised, dramatic _shriek._

He turns in theatrical slow motion to face her, and the two of them stare each other down for a moment.

"THAT'S IT!" he exclaims, grabbing at the fresh swaths of snow at his feet, slipping a little in his attempt to take a quick charge in her direction with a manic smile plastered on his face.

Kim's eyes widen as she blows a stunned kind of raspberry and turns on her heel, cloak whipping around, boots sliding like Zack's in her haste to escape.

A short ways away, Trini looks up from where she's building a snowman with Billy. "You've done it now," she deadpans. Jason is sprawled on his back making a snow angel next to them, eyes fixed on the sky.

Working like a very enthused orchestra conductor, Kim waves her wand at the snow around her as she books it past them with what she'd label as quite impressive agility. In the space of a few heartbeats, it forms into packed snowballs that begin pelting backwards in Zack's direction.

And either her aim must suck or he's unfazed—likely both, actually—because there's soon a return _barrage_ hitting her on every part of her body.

"NoooooOOOOOO," Kim squeals, curving around to run back towards the others wildly. Once she reaches them, she dives behind Trini for cover. "YO, SAVE ME!"

With a roll of her eyes, Trini merely moves to the side a little so Kim's exposed again.

When Kim makes to scuttle behind her once more, she sighs _loudly_ , and there's a stout pause before Trini suddenly waves her wand, spelling a wall of snow to spring up a few feet away, just high enough for them to crouch behind and blocking them from Zack.

Another twitch of Trini's wand and a bunch of snow around them starts to form into perfect snowballs of its own accord. Directing them to pile neatly behind the wall, she slinks over to brace her shoulder against it expertly.

She throws a pointed look at Kim, and—

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Trini yells, starting to chuck the snowballs in Zack's direction with silly abandon.

 _Beaming_ , Kim crawls along the ground to keep her head down and joins Trini on the other side of the snowball pile, still growing in a rapidly-building pyramid of ammo as the seconds pass.

Zack slides to a halt in his tracks, laughing, then waves his own wand to form an identical little shelter wall, which he promptly hides behind.

Kim slyly streaks out from behind her and Trini's cover, cackling madly, and bewitches no less than ten snowballs to go soaring around Zack's wall, surrounding him on all sides and hanging in the air menacingly.

"SURRENDER!" she shouts, wearing a smug smile that she can feel warming every part of her, like a promise of laughter.

Zack's hair appears over the top of his wall, followed by his narrowed eyes. He's wearing a calculating look, clearly trying to figure out if he should give it up—

But Jason's steady voice booms from their right, "NEVER!"

He barrels in to hide beside Zack, quickly sending snowballs out at Kim, who spells hers to follow through on the threat and pelt the both of them mercilessly.

"Okay, okay," Kim calls, panting and holstering her wand with an elaborate performative movement. "How about no magic?"

A snowball smacks her in the shoulder, and she whirls around to find Billy standing there, frozen as if in disbelief, with another ready-made snowball clutched in his left hand.

"Oh dear," he says quietly, sounding like a person who is intensely regretting their actions.

Kim grins and bends down to the ground to grab more snow, glancing casually up at Billy, who's still rooted in the same spot. "Sure you want to join in, B?"

"I, er—" Billy stutters, peering down at the snowball in his hand with a frown. Tilts his head to the side slightly. "That was my intention, though in retrospect, it may have been ill-advised. But yes, I would like to participate."

"Great," Kim barks, then whips one at him, hitting right in the centre of the chest.

Billy lets out a little hoot of a laugh and remains still for a moment, then goes into a sprint to avoid Kim's next snowball.

He dives in with Trini and Kim's eyes go wide all at once, finding herself in between her four friends—Jason and Zack on her left and Trini and Billy on the right.

A certain sense of impending doom dawns on her.

_Oh no._

The other four seem to be on the same wavelength, and all of them grin devilishly.

(With the exception of Billy, who straight-up looks delighted.)

"Er, listen," Kim starts, backing away slowly with her hands up and flashing her most charming smile, "you all love me. You wouldn't—"

"FIRE!" Trini shouts, eyes lit up and smiling wide. Kim yelps as she's hit on all sides, making to run away again—

But Jason anticipated it this time, apparently, because he's on her quicker than she can get ahead.

He grabs Kim around the waist, hauling her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. The other three appear a moment later, with Trini drawing her wand and waving it in great swooping motions, charming a giant snow drift to form.

Jason promptly tosses a _howling_ Kim off his shoulder and into it, where she goes falling softly, the snow cushioning before compacting, and comes to a stop several feet down.

Kim huffs and lays there, surrounded on all sides by packed snow—though not uncomfortably—with everything now muffled and quiet, unable to see anything except for the body-shaped outline that acts like a window to the clear blue sky above.

Jason, Billy, Trini, and Zack's heads appear, looking down at her and silhouetted by the bright winter sunlight from behind. Their white smiles are easy to see, though, brilliantly contrasted.

They all peer down at her innocently.

With a scoff, Kim tries to move—

_What on earth._

It's much harder than it should be. The snow's stiff as all hell.

"Need help up there, Kim?" Trini chirps sweetly, with a suspicious glint in her eye.

Kim glares. "Ten sickles you did something. I can't move."

"Oh really? Can't move?" Trini coos, blinking rapidly. "Well, consider this a character building exercise then. Tough love is often the best, eh lads?" She looks around at Jason, Billy, and Zack, who all nod solemnly.

With that, Jason casually turns and winks at Kim. "Best of luck, love!" he offers, then walks out of her very limited field of vision.

Billy seems a bit conflicted before he shares a look with Trini that Kim can't pinpoint; after a moment he gives a wave, then departs after Jason without another word.

"Wait—" Kim splutters hastily, letting out a little stunned laugh. "Wait, wait, okay. You can't just _leave_ me—"

"Byeee Kimbo," Zack sings.

Trini remains, peering down at her with a smug grin. "When you're done chilling here, we'll be in the Great Hall, mmkay?"

Kim's eyes go wide, unable to keep from smiling in her bewilderment. "Did you just pun me?"

"I did. Good day to you," Trini says. And with a curt, businesslike nod, she leaves too.

"HEY!" Kim yells after her. "GUYS!"

She's met with silence.

"Wankers," she mutters, letting out a pitiful whine.

Kim makes to wiggle again, attempting to reach her forearm holster, but she can't move at _all_.

She considers for a few moments, and is about to try at sending a Warming Charm through her hands to melt the snow when four heads pop right back into her field of vision.

"Hullo," Zack says, reaching a hand in to help her out. All at once, the snow around her seems to give, and she frees her arm with little effort.

With a roll of her eyes Kim takes his offered hand, muttering obscenities. Once she's standing upright, Trini brushes off the back of her cloak a little.

Throwing her most spectacular glare around with conviction, Kim scoffs and turns to speed past them, starting to walk towards the castle. Hiding a bright smile.

The other four come peeling around in front of her though, grinning like idiots. They post up and just stand there, blocking her way and staring at her goofily.

Kim huffs, unable to tamp down the smile any longer, feeling it pull at the corners of her mouth insistently, inevitably. And Jason barks out a laugh in triumph before turning around and offering a piggyback ride, which she happily accepts.

Once Kim's well and situated, she takes the opportunity to mess up his ever-perfect hair.

"Suppose I deserved that," Jason mutters, still laughing.

To show her agreement Kim does it five more times on their way back up to the castle, prompting easy chuckles from him each time.

.

The following evening Trini walks into the bustling Hufflepuff common room with a case of butterbeer in her hands, followed by Cedric and Roger, each holding a case as well.

The space is aflutter with preparations for the party: there are people setting up tables for food and drinking games, moving the furniture to the borders of the room, and hanging up streamers and fairy lights all about.

After their second and final waltz lesson yesterday, Trini had informed Cedric that in order to graduate her crash course, he had to dance with her in front of their Housemates. He was mortified initially, of course, but she gently reminded him that he's going to have to dance in front of the entire school—and the Triwizard delegations—at the Yule Ball in a few days.

He agreed reluctantly, acquiescing that it was a good idea.

As it turned out, plenty of the rest of the House was enthusiastic about learning how to waltz too, given nearly all of them intend on going to the Ball.

So here they all are, throwing a last-minute bash that will be half lessons, half tomfoolery.

Because Trini's seen Cedric dance at plenty a House party in the past — it's just the formality of the waltz that's making him nervous. He needs to loosen up, and doing some more 'serious' dancing interspersed with some silliness is called for.

The three of them deposit the cases of butterbeer on a table, with Cedric taking his wand out and waving a Cooling Charm over all of them. The dark bottles glaze over, at once beginning to sweat in the comfortable warmth of the room.

She takes two, cracks them open, and hands one to him and Roger apiece. They both thank her with big smiles, and Aisha, Tanya, Dustin, and Cadwallader soon come in through the entrance passage laden with food of all kinds from the kitchens. There are smiles abounds as they lay it out, and people start flocking over to grab some immediately.

Trini saunters over as well, snagging a couple of the miniature chicken pot pies that were calling her name. She pops one into her mouth happily as she walks over to the table at the back that holds the gramophone setup; humming to herself, she begins to peruse the milk crates full of records chosen for this particular occasion, wiping her fingers on her jeans as she flips through the jackets.

The lights in the room dim and she looks up, smiling at the easy atmosphere created by the combination of coloured fairy lights, gas lamps, and the massive crackling fireplace in the centre of the room. Most everyone has a butterbeer or yellow plastic cup in hand, Summer, Gia, and a few of the other fourth-years already have the pong table going, and Trini figures it's about time for some music.

She'll start the waltz-appropriate songs later, once everyone's ate their fill. For now, she chooses ['Groove Is In the Heart'](https://open.spotify.com/track/2He3NOyqtLNE3RQPpeDdSb?si=cyqb7wG0Ql2OZjsG8am1TQ).

"' _We're going to dance. We're going to dance..._ '"

Trini looks up at the room to gauge their reactions, finding smiles all around, some people starting to bob their heads as they mull about. Others are arriving from the dormitories, looking around and making beelines for the drinks or food tables.

She picks up the fountain pen laid next to the little pad of parchment on top of one of the record crates and starts writing a list of songs for the queue, including the artist and album name, so whoever's nearest the gramophone can switch the song as they go through the night.

Some of the older kids know how to wave their wands and have a certain record play at a specific track, but most just change it manually. It's a system that their House has used for much longer than she's been at Hogwarts, and it works quite well.

Everyone mulls about for twenty minutes or so, eating and chatting, laughing and playing drinking games to the tune of the music, and as soon as ['Temple Head'](https://open.spotify.com/track/3jfxfd9XG1F3BuK07Kw7kR?si=woQl4VN4TWCxJZwlSRA54g) starts to finish up, Trini puts her hand on Cedric's arm and motions for him to follow her to the middle of the crowded room. She waves her wand at the gramophone to lower the volume and looks around at everyone.

Cedric puts two fingers in his mouth and whistles to get everyone's attention, and they all look over, smiling.

"Alright everyone? Welcome to Waltz 101," Trini says, voice clear and carrying through the room. Everybody cheers and she smiles, holding up a hand. "Ced and I are gonna show you the ropes. If you could all divide into two lines on either side of the room—gender doesn't matter, you can decide who'll lead between you and your partner—and watch as we twirl around for a song, that'd be great."

Enthusiasm abounds, everybody shuffles to follow her instructions, soon facing Trini and Cedric as they walk into the large open space that's opened up in the middle. She nods at Cadwallader, who's positioned behind the gramophone, and signals him to hold off on the music for a moment.

Trini turns slowly on the spot as she continues to speak, "The waltz is _super_ simple if you don't overthink it. It's a three count — so, with Ced leading, it looks like this..."

She steps into him and counts off under her breath so only he can hear, and as they start to dance in a box step, she narrates out loud for everyone, "One, two, three. One, two, three. Forward, side, close. Back, side, close."

The two of them stop and Trini looks around again. "Turning and stuff is something you can do once you've got this down. And it doesn't have to be perfect, alright? Just have fun."

She smiles at everyone as there are some whoops of encouragement directed at Cedric, who blushes lightly. "We'll go for one song, then come on in and join us," she continues. "If you don't have a partner, pair up with someone else who doesn't. Those of you who are familiar with the steps already, help out those who aren't."

Trini nods again at Cadwallader and ['Wallflower'](https://open.spotify.com/track/1jExlbW0RhRCBTQG52jVgB?si=Q-UU5VhZS9mQqbv8qvEyoA) by Bob Dylan starts a moment later. Cedric offers his hand, which she takes with a goofy smile, and he draws her in, all gentlemanly but obviously very nervous.

As they start to dance Trini keeps her eyes on his face, making sure to exude encouragement. "It's just us here," she breathes lowly, so only he can make it out. "Just you and me. You're doing great."

They start to turn, slowly rotating for a bit before changing smoothly to the opposite direction. Trini smiles wide, genuine happiness and pride shining in her eyes as Cedric leads her in a way that seems effortless, the tension in his shoulders relaxing as the song runs on.

Their Housemates watch in near silence with fond smiles on their faces, some counting under their breath or shuffling their feet discreetly, trying to visualise dancing themselves.

The song ends and there's a brief pause as Cadwallader sets up another Bob Dylan song, ['The Times They Are A-Changin''](https://open.spotify.com/track/52vA3CYKZqZVdQnzRrdZt6?si=CSwwOgYpS9yNCzExX0yNIQ). Trini beckons everyone in with a gesture of her hand, and when it starts up everyone in the lines on either side of the room slowly step into the middle to join them, some smiling wide, others looking a bit shy as they approach their partners.

Trini feels goosebumps erupt over her whole body, unexpectedly.

And they all start to dance together, with the common room feeling both larger and smaller all at once; comfortable, but intimate. Some pairs begin to spin slowly while others do a straight box step, and there's an easy, low medley of laughs that begins to float through the room, as feet are lightly trodden on or couples brush up against one another in the warm, safe atmosphere of it all.

Cedric twirls Trini under his arm, smiling wide once he completes it without issue, and she can't help but _beam_ back when he pulls her in again gently, a bit closer than they were before.

He watches her for a few moments as they move together. "Promise me you'll let me waltz you around at your wedding?" he asks quietly, eyes bright in the dim light of the room.

Trini inclines her head. "This's going on the mixtape, then. I'll be waiting," she breathes, voice matching his—quiet, like they're in the thrall of a moment better understated, better gentle. A space of forever contained in a three minute song.

Everyone continues to dance as they start and make their way through a cover of ['Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be, Will Be)'](https://open.spotify.com/track/52Xfwd81ZsBMDTW2S2X3zz?si=_wuFg6xRQDWCi1knmL9F8Q) by Sly & The Family Stone. It's a song Trini absolutely loves, and it fits with the tempo for waltz, so it was an easy pick.

As she peers around, all she sees is smiles on everyone's faces, illuminated in the rainbow of fairy lights.

Trini lets out a happy little sigh. Figures she did okay, and Cedric gently squeezes her hand to tell her that he agrees.

By the end, and to her delight, most everyone has the hang of the steps. When it finishes proper she steps back from Cedric and they do a little bow to each other.

"How does everyone feel about that? Get on okay?" she asks, looking around at them all. There are sounds of agreement and clapping, along with a whole lot of thanks thrown her way, and she smiles. "Alright. How about we let loose a bit, now? We'll return to this in a few songs." She jerks her head at Cadwallader and he smiles wide, putting the next record on her written list onto the gramophone and positioning the needle carefully.

"Thank you all for coming," Cedric calls, beaming at all of them. "Wally — if you please."

Cadwallader gives him a goofy thumbs up and drops the needle, starting ['Let's Work'](https://open.spotify.com/track/0wgVCOPXv9YSgmRijmDSkh?si=cJw7cIl7Q6GOkJtemsqv4Q) by Prince.

Everyone starts bopping around at once, dancing loosely and smiling. Trini moves out of the crowd and over to the gramophone, where she nods at Cadwallader. "Go dance, mate. I'm gonna chill for a bit."

He grips her shoulder fondly and nods, and she pulls up a chair to sit as he walks away to join in on the dancing, stopping by the drinks table to bring another cold butterbeer over to Cedric. They cheers and whoop and dance along with the rest, and Trini laughs under her breath, watching the silliness of it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'electric indigo' by the paper kites.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO! getting back into the lighter stuff, post the trouble with kim vs some of the slytherins. it's cool to have everyone in the castle around for the winter holidays, given most kids are usually at home as soon as classes are over. thought we could have some hangouts! and a snowball fight was necessary, of course.
> 
> clarifying note about will aston — will's a practicing muslim who doesn't drink alcohol, but the gryffindors were at that party well into the early hours. so though she isn't hungover like mackenzie, bright lights and noise and such are not great on no sleep. and!!!! will's also autistic, as previously mentioned. all that party shit tires her out much more than some. so that thing she does where she pulls her hijab down over her eyes to just... stop seeing the world/block out lights etc is something you'll see here and there. it's both a playful thing she does (purely because she's a dramatic idiot) and also very much a practical technique she employs to cut down on sensory over-stimulation, in addition to her aforementioned earplugs. 
> 
> bit of a mention of zack's dad, too. trini evidently doesn't know what happened there, but she knows that he's not around anymore. that's IT. and you will find out about that at a FUTURE DATE! but yeah. kept zack's little chess games with his mum from the 2017 film, as he mentioned to kim a few chapters back.
> 
> note, kim also has a chronic pain thing, given she gets headaches and migraines fairly regularly. it's been mentioned before multiple times in passing, and often has to do with over-stimulation that's an unhelpful hand-in-hand thing with the adhd. but she has a whole bunch of triggers, including the STRESS that would come from being in a fairly substantial bully confrontation. also, if you remember, her mum maddy had a migraine when she came to visit hogsmeade. she gets them too.
> 
> and! trini's! starting! to! notice... DIFFERENT kim feelings. slowly. does she want to acknowledge them? continue to ignore? DOES SHE EVEN KNOW WHAT THEY ARE? TIME WILL TELL.
> 
> snowball fight was... lovely. kim being an idiot? and completely NOT thinking shit through? on brand. the others teasing her as a group is also... pure. I appreciate it a whole lot. they're showing their BIG LOVE for her in their own way, yaknow? she's had a rough few days. 
> 
> for the record, trini doesn't... actually believe in 'tough love', and neither do I. was just a joke. like, sure, confrontation can be necessary in some situations, and some people need to be kind of figuratively smacked awake (you'll see later kim is one of these people, and jason and tommy do this for her sometimes) but I hate how that phrase 'tough love' is used in Society! 
> 
> ANYWAY!
> 
> as for the hufflepuff waltz 101 party. I just. yeah. I want to apologise for that bit about trini saving cedric a dance on her wedding day but I also... don't want to. I'm sorry but I'm not, okay? I hurt myself with that one. and ced said it so... completely without any input from me. idk, in all seriousness, these kids have had the reigns since even before I started writing this story down. I feel like I'm so rarely in control of what they do. my job's just documenting. so when they had that exchange I was just... like... ok. okokokok that's... fine.
> 
> also, as evidenced already! but to remind you! trini is loved dearly by her house. she's a hot(shot) quidditch star with a grumpy but PURE heart my dudes!
> 
> BUT YEAH JUST! HAPPY MOMENTS! HAPPY TIMES WITH EACH OTHER! EVERYTHING IS OKAY AND GOOD FOR NOW!
> 
> \---
> 
> some more soft stuff next time with the kids, including a little christmas eve get together and their secret santa gift exchange!
> 
> thank you as always for reading, everyone. the fact that I've been getting more and more comments every chapter is... so unexpected and incredible. thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts and feelings, I can't say how much it means to me. IT KEEPS ME GOIN U KNO!
> 
> hope you're having a good day/night, and take care! <3


	40. The Little Things That Give You Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/4hZBQElqZGij1ffHQdMQVa?si=XlYRWcfNQPGOGNVfxyZBHg). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house...'"

Trini squeezes Gia's knee and gets to her feet, stretching a little and hitching her rucksack up onto her shoulder.

With a wave goodbye, she begins making her way through the sea of beanbags, chairs, and people huddled in soft piles on the common room floor to the back, where tables are set up bearing leftover food and drinks. One of the upper-year _Readers_ continues to read the poem, everyone in the room listening in happy, sleepy silence.

Considering for a moment, Trini snags two heavy glass jugs of eggnog from the table and places them carefully in her bag, checks her forearm holster to make sure her wand is there, and sets out through the exit into the corridor.

She makes her way to her destination slowly, descending a few storeys beneath the castle to reach the correct dungeon level, the _tap tap_ of her trainers the only sound in the otherwise peaceful, Christmas Eve quiet.

Turning off the stairs and into a corridor, the green lights from the lamps on the walls provide a low illumination in the darkness. Shivering a little at the drop in temperature, she keeps her ears perked; not a huge fan of how it's darker in some areas, short stretches where the cold creeps in a bit more due to an errant lamp being out. She pulls her hoodie sleeves down over her hands absentmindedly as she makes a turn, clutching a piece of parchment in her hand that bears Kim's scribbled directions to one classroom in particular.

Trini hums a little tune to herself as she winds through the labyrinthine corridors and begins counting doors. Reaching what she assumes to be the correct one, she looks around a bit before drawing her wand and tapping the handle.

" _Alohomora_."

There's a gentle _click_ and Trini pushes it open, finding herself facing a small but comfortably-sized classroom. She's greeted by a soft smell of cinnamon that warms the chilly dungeon air and her eyes adjust to the dim but soft light, yellowish orange instead of green-tinted.

The desks, tables, and chairs have been pushed to the perimeter, and there's a happy crackling fire blazing in the hearth at the end opposite. Happy chatter and laughter reach her ears, a deep male voice carrying around the room from Kim's fancy _HMV 102_ gramophone, which Trini recognises to be a read-along of _Frosty the Snowman_ , if the illustrated children's book that Jason's holding up for the four of them to see is any indication.

Trini smiles as she closes the door quietly, watching her friends for a few moments: Jason and Kim are laying together in front of the fireplace in a pile of pillows and blankets, her head on his chest, Zack is sitting cross-legged on their right and in the middle of stuffing an entire mincemeat pie into his mouth, and Billy is sipping on a butterbeer on Jason's other side, his back to the fire.

Billy looks up, smiling softly in greeting. Waves, causing the others to turn around and greet her with sleepy, bright smiles.

Giving a little wave back, Trini's eyes catch on the red, white, and green fairy lights hanging in the air by magic just below the ceiling. What could be over a hundred candles are placed on the tables pushed up against the walls, flickering merrily, and there are countless plush blankets strewn about, covering the cold stone floor and making the whole place feel warmer; more inviting.

She toes off her trainers on instinct at the door, padding in and moving over to a table on the left where an open case of butterbeer is perched along with a wide variety of snacks.

"Alright, Trini," Billy greets, popping to his feet and coming over. Zack follows, making a stop at his bag to bring out a beautiful wooden carved mug, which he places on the table.

Trini removes the two jugs of eggnog from her bag, smiling. "Hey. Happy Christmas Eve, all."

The four of them return the sentiment, with Zack drawing his wand to make copies of his mug. Uncorking the first bottle of eggnog, he carefully pours a cup each for them and adds a bit of rum from a beat up flask, humming along to the _Frosty the Snowman_ theme song under his breath, which is playing from the gramophone as an end to the story.

Jason nods in Trini's direction. "Just finishing up Frosty — we was waiting for you to start Charlie Brown."

"Sorry I took a bit," Trini returns, carrying two mugs of eggnog over to Jason and Kim, who accept them with soft thanks. "Everyone was nearly asleep when I left."

"No apologies," Jason says, waving her off lightly. "Just glad you came." He shifts a bit under Kim to grab his wand from where it's laying a few feet away and waves it, bringing a butterbeer soaring over. Plucking it out of the air, he pokes it with his wand to cool it and hands it to Trini. "You have to catch up — Kim and I are on four."

Taking the beer, Trini raises her eyebrow and meets Kim's eyes, the flames of the fireplace reflected there, who's looking back at her with an unbridled fondness written all over her face. "Four, eh?"

Kim scoffs good-naturedly and smiles. "Been here for a couple hours," she mutters, then squints a little. She waves her hand, bringing two more butterbeers sailing over, which she promptly casts a Cooling Charm over before opening them. Handing one to Jason, he chuckles and takes a long pull.

And Kim and Jason have been here for a couple hours for one specific reason—there's a Christmas Eve party in the Slytherin common room tonight. From Trini's understanding, all of the Houses are holding some kind of celebration, given most kids fourth year and above are still at school for the Yule Ball tomorrow.

But Kim doesn't feel like she's welcome at Slytherin events, and understandably, so Jason planned this instead. Otherwise, she would be sitting in her dorm alone, or elsewhere in the castle, most likely.

Trini's heart warms as she watches Kim and Jason talk lowly, the other two still behind them doing something or other.

A minute or so later Zack and Billy come over, bearing two paper plates stacked high with assorted food and snacks. They place them on the floor carefully as Kim moves over to her gramophone to change out the record; flipping through a small pile of albums in a stack next to it, she picks out [_The Temptations' Christmas Card_](https://open.spotify.com/album/6I2JnGSREqEgFPnSXkFxlW?si=kpov7luZSFKsqQ6gUEvHrQ) and sets it up, dropping the needle to start it playing softly.

'Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer' begins, and Trini takes a pull from her beer. Intent to go slow, given she already indulged a fair amount at her little House gathering.

She sighs contentedly.

The five of them go through most of the album chatting lightly, and once it's done Jason reaches over and picks up the old bright red record sleeve that has [_A Charlie Brown Christmas_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v78Ka4mSt1A) written across the front. Humming to himself, he sets it up as they all watch him fondly.

It's a kind of peace that's different from what she's used to, Trini finds. And it isn't exactly new? given she has friends in her House who she loves dearly and spends time with often.

But there's something different, more cohesive about this group. It's a special type of belonging with them around her, sitting here in the soft firelight listening to a classic holiday story. And as Trini revels in the feeling, she actively tries to write it all into her memory, taking a deep breath in and out as the opening notes start from the gramophone.

.

On Christmas morning Kim wakes up with a lightness in her heart, rolling around under the covers for a moment before sitting herself up in her bed. She pulls the curtain of her four-poster back to see her roommates are still sleeping and checks her clock—it's just past seven thirty.

With a happy little sigh, she notes that there's a small pile of presents at the foot of her bed, brought by the house elves in the night. She swings her legs over the side and into her slippers, stretching lavishly.

One in particular is from 'Secret Santa', and Kim smiles as she picks it up. The handwriting on the label is large and blocky—deliberately ambiguous—and the parcel is wrapped in green paper with pictures of red baubles on it, sporting a silver bow on top. It's soft and fairly large, and she hums happily as she places it on her bed along with her other gifts.

Kim showers and pads back into the room quietly, getting dressed in lounge clothes and fuzzy socks before grabbing the Secret Santa gift and her current book. Once Ptero's coiled around her neck and situated she exits her dorm, intent on making her way up to breakfast.

Walking through the empty common room, she peers at the _Slytherin Spins_ portion of the noticeboard; noting Cameron's left Mariah Carey's Christmas album perched on a pile of five or so other records next to the ancient gramophone that never leaves its place in the corner, complete with a giant brass horn taller than she is.

Kim stares at it for a moment then smiles to herself, glancing around before striding over. She peers at the tracklist on the back of the sleeve, takes the record out, then sets it up on the table, positioning the needle so that the second song, ['All I Want For Christmas Is You'](https://open.spotify.com/track/0bYg9bo50gSsH3LtXe2SQn?si=AmJLsPgqRrKIYrWvoVW14w) starts up. Twitching her fingers to raise the volume slightly by magic, she smiles wider at the little xylophone notes as they begin to play.

"Yesssssss," comes a male voice from the direction of the entry to the boys dormitories, and Kim spins around quickly, tensing up.

But she's pleasantly surprised to see Xander Bly, one of the four guys in her year who runs _Slytherin Spins_ , sauntering out towards her; singing the song in a theatrical, deep voice like an idiot. He's physically fit, good looking, maybe a couple inches taller than Jason, with wavy dark brown hair.

If this was a teen film, he would be the popular boy that everyone fanned over.

Kim notices these things, of course.

Xander comes towards her and holds out his hand in question, which she takes, laughing lightly as he spins her around once slowly.

"Do one of you get Summoned whenever music is played in the common room?" she asks, still smiling.

"Oh, yes," he says seriously. "Part of the blood pact we signed." He jerks his head as he moves past her, beckoning her to follow him to the noticeboard. "Care to help me with this?"

"Happy Christmas to you too."

He grins. "Happy Christmas, Kim."

Kim watches as he unrolls a long page of parchment, which he tacks up at the top, indicating for her to hold it as he spreads out the bottom. Once it's up proper he steps back, crossing his arms and looking satisfied.

She peers at it curiously: it has 'Currently Rocking' written across the top in big letters, and has the names of everyone who's a part of the record sharing system listed—herself included—with a couple blank lines next to each.

Mariah continues to croon in the background as Kim asks, "And this is?"

Xander smiles softly. "By popular request. People keep saying that our recommendations are great and all, but they want more stuff to peruse, I guess. We've the Greatest Hits list, yeah, but this is more of a fluid thing. Anyone in on the system can write whatever album they're jamming to as of late."

"That's brilliant," Kim mutters.

"Put one up!" Xander urges, waving his hand at it.

Kim blinks, hesitates. "Er... I don't know." Rubs at the back of her neck, suddenly self-conscious, which isn't a feeling she experiences often.

"Come on, Hart," he says playfully, then pauses. "We did some enchantments, just like the ones on the _Compendium_ —only people in on the system can write on it, and you can wipe yours away at any time."

She stares at him pointedly, self-consciousness melting away at the challenge in his voice, quirking her eyebrow and smirking in a way that makes him blush a little, to her delight.

If she's sure of anything, it's that boys are easy.

"Do you have a pen?" she asks airily, holding her hand out.

He smiles wide and starts patting at his robes—a bit hurriedly and eager to please, she notes with a sly satisfaction, though she doesn't show it—and produces a fountain pen. Kim takes it with a low, slightly sing-song, "Thank youuu," and turns slowly away from him. Running her index finger down the list, she finds her name and pauses before writing '[ _MTV Unplugged In New York_](https://open.spotify.com/album/1To7kv722A8SpZF789MZy7?si=S7z-zefsQlG23XN4fQGyeA) \- Nirvana'.

"Happy?" she asks, turning back around and handing him the pen.

Xander lets out a little laugh. "Interesting. Haven't heard that one yet—it's on my list."

Kim looks at him for a moment pointedly before taking her wand out of her sleeve and waving it a few times—to open the door to the girls dormitories, then the one to her own, then to unlatch her _HMV_ gramophone case where it sits on her desk. She pictures the record clearly in her mind and mutters, " _Accio_."

It soon comes sailing towards her, and she holds her hand out to pluck it from the air coolly without looking. With another few waves of her wand, she closes her gramophone case and the doors.

Kim steps close to Xander and pushes the record into his chest. "Come find me when you're done," she says lowly, in a voice that's _borderline_ seductive, though she makes sure to keep any suggestion of it being deliberate out of her face and posture. Preferring to toy with him and leave her intentions ambiguous.

When he takes it from her she turns and exits the common room, leaving him standing there with a goofy smile on his face.

The unmarked wall that acts as the entrance slides shut with a satisfying _thud_ behind her, and she strides the length of the corridor, shaking her head at herself and smiling.

After climbing up to the castle Kim enters the Great Hall, finding it decked out in what likely are much more elaborate Christmas decorations than usual on account of the Tournament. It smells like fir needles, icing sugar, and cinnamon, with multi-coloured baubles sparkling all around in the light of thousands of candles and torches.

Kim's about to turn to sit at the Slytherin table when she catches a familiar pair of eyes.

Trini smiles at her, looking a bit unsure at being caught staring, but Kim feels something like warmth spark to life in her chest as she makes for the mostly deserted Hufflepuff table without thinking twice.

And any suave air she had about her when she was with Xander seems to leave her in a hurry, replaced with a kind of happy nervousness; a flutter in her heart that promises to make a fool out of her if she isn't careful.

Because flirting, acting cool and charming... that's all well and good, really. But it's like the more time she spends with Trini, the less able she is to bring that side of herself out on a whim. Like her brain stops functioning properly, inexplicably.

It makes Kim more honest, not as calculating; less like she's pushing buttons and trying to gauge the reaction. Forces her to be more trusting around Trini, almost—given she's not able to properly put up that illusion of mystery, that deliberate veil of smoke to keep people back _just_ enough so that she seems accessible, but never close enough to get a handle on.

She certainly still manages it—any flirty remarks to Trini are almost entirely intentional from Kim's end. But she's found that they have a different kind of effect than they usually do; when Kim manages to pluck up enough courage in the moment to be even the _tiniest_ bit suggestive, it works to throw _her_ off balance as well.

Like a recoil, which is a new experience for her, truly.

"Happy Christmas," Trini says, voice low and gravelly from sleep still. She has a half-eaten bowl of cornflakes in front of her and Sabre is winding around her legs.

Kim smiles as she returns with, "Happy Christmas, Trin," then bends down to pet Sabre before sliding onto the bench next to her. Nobody except for a few Hufflepuff upper-years are here at the table, sitting way at the other end, and Kim bops their shoulders together before she pulls a mug towards herself and pours a cup of coffee.

"Got your gift then?" Trini asks, sporting a sly smile and jerking her head at the parcel Kim's just deposited on the table.

"I did," Kim answers, trying to keep her face impassive. She didn't get Trini for her Secret Santa gift recipient, but it's supposed to be a _surprise_ and she doesn't want to give anything away. Looking up at the enchanted ceiling, where snowflakes are falling, then around at the rest of the hall, she lets out a happy little sigh. "It's sort of nice being here for Christmas, isn't it?"

Trini nods. "This sounds weird, but I could get used to it." Kim tilts her head curiously, silently asking for elaboration, and Trini hums. "I dunno. Waking up here, seeing the castle decorated like this..." she trails off, pausing. "I mean, it's nice, you know? Feels so much like home that I'm surprised."

Kim smiles at her and takes a sip of her coffee as Trini continues, "I love being at mine for Christmas, don't get me wrong, but I came in here earlier and it just... hit me, I guess. The fact that we go to a school of _magic_ in a giant, thousand-year-old castle." She shakes her head, smiling. "I've never been here on Christmas day so I hadn't seen the hall decorated like this. Felt like I was in first year again, seeing everything for the first time."

"I love that feeling," Kim says softly, looking around, trying to see what Trini sees. "It's so... warm. Safe."

"Exactly," Trini mutters. "Like everything's right in the moment, like nothing can touch it."

Kim smiles at her and reaches across the table to squeeze her hand once, gently. She grabs a bowl and pours herself some cornflakes, then milk, and starts munching on it happily.

" _Ender's Game_?" Trini asks, jerking her head at Kim's book on the table.

Kim nods, chewing on her cereal and swallowing before she answers, "Yeah. I'm not very far in yet but it's dark as all hell."

Trini nods knowingly. "But _space_."

Kim smiles. "Space." She thumbs the corner of the book, pulling a chunk of pages back then letting them go with a satisfying _thwap_. "It's such a cool concept. I'm a sucker for sci-fi, honestly."

"Didn't realise you read so much." Trini grabs a satsuma from a bowl and starts to peel it. "Every time I see you there's a different book in your hand."

"There're a lot of things I do to try and keep myself sane," Kim says lightly, shrugging. The crisp citrus smell from the satsuma fills her nose, and she sighs happily again. "Reading is one of them, I guess."

"Nice to have something for yourself," Trini returns, then gestures at the book lazily. "Don't let me keep you."

Kim shakes her head. "It can wait. You're more interesting."

"More interesting than intergalactic space travel?" Trini deadpans, quirking an eyebrow as she pours herself more coffee. "Than aliens?"

Kim grins. "Mmm, when you put it that way, definitely not."

Trini shoves her lightly. "Jerk."

"You said it, not me."

They continue to banter back and forth, enjoying the ease of Christmas morning and people-watching as more students and teachers arrive in the hall for breakfast. Billy joins them first, sporting a giant red Father Christmas hat with what looks like a fluffy square dreidel bauble on the end. It seems to be enchanted to slowly light up and spin, changing colours from white, to green, to red over and over.

Trini gives a little wave to Hoose, who's fastened to the breast of Billy's jumper, smiling at them.

Jason and Zack come in a half hour later, both looking sleepy but content as they exchange Christmas wishes and sit down on Billy's side of the table.

It's a quiet morning, given the vast majority of students from years one through three have gone home for the holidays already. The Yule Ball has an age limit of fourth year and above, with the only exception being if someone in the lower years is tagging along as a plus one. Kim and Jason had both informed their Heads of House that Tommy would be coming as their date to be double sure she would be permitted to attend.

And if Kim knows Tommy, she will be asleep until noon today. Christmas morning sleep-ins are a well-established tradition at the Oliver household.

Jason peers around the table, spots a steaming spinach quiche, and lets out a triumphant, villainous laugh. Zack slides it towards him and Jason slices himself a giant piece, expressly waiting until his mouth is full before speaking, "Wonder if they always have this, or if it's just 'cause of Beauxbatons?"

Billy gives him a disapproving look at his complete lack of manners, though there's a small, amused smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. "I believe quiche specifically is a French dish, Jason. But similar flans have existed in England for some time, so it's hard to say for sure."

"Either way," Trini mutters, promptly carving herself a little slice as well. "Absolute rookie mistake, me eating cereal before the real food arrived."

Kim chuckles. "Well, that can't be helped. How were we to know that nine was when breakfast started proper?"

"How long have you lot been _up_?" Zack asks, aghast.

Kim and Trini both shrug at the same time, then share a smile once they realise. "Not that early," Trini mutters, then shoves a chunk of quiche into her mouth.

"You don't strike me as a person who'd enjoy mornings, Trini," Billy says, now stirring a bit of milk into his cup of tea.

Trini huffs. "Honestly? It's surprising to me too. I love sleep more than I love myself."

Kim rolls her eyes. "Do I seem like a morning person?" she asks Billy teasingly.

"No," Billy replies, sounding certain. "Night, definitely."

Kim's face breaks into a goofy smile. "Excellent."

The five of them continue to eat, enjoying each other's presence and the easy peace of the morning, until Zack pulls a parcel out of his bag and plops it on the table, smiling. "Presents now?"

There are sounds of agreement from everyone, each pulling their own gifts out. Kim pokes at hers playfully and grins. Trini knocks on hers like an idiot and puts an ear to it.

"Same time or turns?" Billy asks.

The five of them look between each other, smiles growing for a couple seconds before they all start ripping the wrapping paper off their gifts at once: Zack with glee and throwing it in the air as he does, Jason putting a bow on his head as a hat, and Billy draping a ribbon around his neck like a necklace.

Kim and Trini both pause for a moment to watch them fondly, and once Zack's managed to finally get his unwrapped, they all peer at their gifts at the same time.

And Kim runs her fingers over hers, mouth falling open. In her hands is a beautiful green and silver throw that looks somewhere between a tapestry and a blanket, woven from a material that's soft as silk. It's somehow thick but lightweight, and Kim can tell immediately that she's going to get a whole lot of use out of it.

She holds it out, grabbing the top corners so she can see the design in the middle. It's the Slytherin House crest, and she stares at the whole thing for a moment before smushing her face into it happily. When she drops it into her lap and spreads it out over her legs, Trini peers over, impressed, then picks up a corner to feel the material. "One guess at who this is from," she mutters.

Kim throws a look across the table at Zack, who must sense her eyes, because he peers up from his own gift and smiles wide. "Like it?" he asks, looking a bit sheepish.

"It's _beautiful_ ," Kim says, voice sincere. She can't wait to put it on her bed and burrow underneath. "Probably a stupid question, but did you... make it?"

Zack nods. "Not stupid. But, really, only someone as fit as me could make something that good looking."

Jason groans softly from beside him and shakes his head. "Better watch that big head of yours. Gonna right topple over one of these days."

"You'll be there to catch me," Zack croons, making a kissy face at him.

Jason rolls his eyes and jerks his head. "But I can witness that he made it—he's been working in the common room for ages. Mack started calling him Nonna because he'd just... sit there with his honest-to-fuck _loom_ , bloody weaving."

"That title is a badge of honour," Zack says proudly, puffing out his chest. He looks back at Kim. "But yeah, it's woven, and if you do this—" he reaches across the table, making sure not to put his sleeve in a dish of scrambled eggs, and taps the throw with his wand, muttering, " _Pink_."

All of the green accents turn a hot pink at once, and the silver ones turn black.

"What the _fuck_ ," Kim murmurs, letting out a disbelieving laugh. "That's amazing."

Zack shrugs. "That's the only colour change it does, but I hope you like it. More important is that I charmed it to heat up if you trace the image of the snake with your finger. Try it, go from the tail to head."

Kim blinks, unsure if he's pulling her leg or not, but tentatively places her finger on the snakes tail then traces the image, ending at the head like instructed. The whole thing immediately heats up, and she makes an appreciative noise. "You know how cold I get!"

"Yeah, Kimbo. Figured this could be both practical and stylish," Zack says, grinning at her. "Trace from the tail to the head to heat it up, then from the head to the tail to decrease the heat. You've got it on max right now since you went all the way to the top, but if you stopped somewhere in the middle, it wouldn't be as warm, see? Made sure the maximum won't burn or anything, either. It's completely safe."

Trini puts her hand on the blanket and nods. "Z, this is a really fucking cool bit of charmwork."

Zack grins. "I think you mean it's real _hot_ , T—"

The rest of them groan in unison as he says it, all shaking their heads. "Really, thank you," Kim mutters after a moment, giving him a big smile. She runs her hand over it again, marveling at just how long it must have taken him. Reaching across the table, she puts her hand on his and meets his eyes. "Honestly. You put so much work into this and it's beautiful. I love it. Thank you so much."

"Of course. Happy Christmas, love," he returns, clearly pleased at her reaction. He peers down at his own gift and grabs at it, holding up a set of brand new, all black Quidditch practice robes. And he desperately needed them, given his other kit is quite literally falling to pieces. "These are mad fancy, Jaybird."

Jason pouts. "How'd you know it was me?!"

"They've _vents_ in them, bruv," Zack chirps, indicating a slit with a tiny zipper that runs up the torso seam. "This' like, pro shit."

"Hope I got your sizes right," Jason says, smiling. "But yeah, they stay perfectly in line with your body temperature, and will warm up or cool down depending on how extreme the weather is. They're quite neat."

Zack claps him on the shoulder, smiling wide too. "It's great. I would've just kept sewing my old kit back together."

Jason grins. "I know, mate. If they don't fit, we can return them over break and grab another size." He pauses, then takes what looks like a business card out of his grey hoodie pocket and holds it out to Zack. "And this, too. Know how you said the enchantments on your mum's favourite tea set are fading, given it's like, a billion years old and has been in your family for ages?"

Zack nods slowly, looking confused, and Jason continues, voice getting softer, "Well, you said you was worried 'cause you'd have to find someone specialised in that kind of thing to fix it, which is mad expensive." He jerks his head at the card and Zack takes it, peering at it curiously. "Turns out a friend of my mum's does all kinds of stuff like that, and he's real legit too—has a famous old shop in London and everything. She talked to him and he's going to fix it for you, no charge. Just tell him your name when you go in and he'll know who you are. I can come too, if you'd like."

There's a few moments of silence, and Kim looks at Zack to see that he has tears in his eyes. He continues to stare down at the business card. "Jason," he whispers, voice wavering a little. " _Thank_ you, mate."

"No big thing. And I know it's not really a gift for you, but—"

Zack shakes his head, meeting Jason's eyes. "It _is_ a gift for me though. This'll make her so happy — I can't tell you how much this means." He wraps his arms around Jason then, patting him on the back.

Jason hugs him tightly, muttering, "Happy Christmas," into his shoulder.

They break apart and Zack takes a deep breath in, then pockets the business card carefully before gripping Jason's forearm. He gazes at the object perched on Jason's lap, which looks like a bright red metal lunch box. "You now, bud."

Jason nods and begins to open it carefully, clearly having waited to peek inside to save some of the surprise. His eyes get wider and wider as he starts pulling at bits of it, and the whole thing is soon revealed to be a toolbox with a fold-out set up. And it's not just the box, either—it's full of tools of all kinds, all unfamiliar to Kim, given she didn't grow up in a household with much muggle influence.

Even to her untrained eye, though, it all looks like much, much more than should physically be able to _fit_ into the box. It very likely has an Extension Charm on it, and Kim only knows one person out of the five of them who could conceivably manage a half decent one, given it's not something they've even covered in class yet.

Kim peers over at Trini knowingly just as Jason seems to come to the same conclusion, looking up at Trini with shining eyes. "You remembered!" he exclaims softly, voice thick with emotion, sincerely touched.

"Of course I did," Trini mutters, voice a bit more of a huff than usual as she crosses her arms, like she's uncomfortable with the affection Jason's displaying. Kim reaches over and uncrosses them gently, taking Trini's hand and bringing it up to rest on the table, where she interlaces their fingers.

Trini blinks rapidly at their joined hands then looks back up at Jason, who's staring at the tools like they're made of diamonds.

"Someone explain, please," Kim says softly, looking between the two of them.

Trini jerks her head at the toolbox, movements still a bit stiff, though she doesn't take her hand back from Kim. "Wonderboy told me that him and his dad are restoring a muggle automobile. My dad owns an auto garage, so I figured I could put together a kit of essential tools." She gestures vaguely at it with her free hand and addresses Jason, "Even if you have some of these already, you can never have too many. And... none of them are new, I hope that's okay—"

"Of course it is, Trin," Jason says quietly, still staring bewildered at the tools.

Trini nods. "But I've cleaned them up, and my dad assured me each one is in tip-top shape." She pauses, looking a bit hesitant. "And I _may_ have cheated a bit on the one gift rule, but it's technically part of it... check in the compartment underneath where your left hand is."

Jason blinks at her then does as instructed. After a moment, he brings out a very large book bound in well-used, shiny brown leather. He clears a space on the table in front of him and places it there carefully, opening it to reveal a reference text full of colourful, moving pictures.

"Now this... is kind of a really, really late birthday present," Trini mutters, and Jason looks up at her, about to open his mouth to protest when she holds up a hand. "I _know_ I got you that big carton of _Every Flavour Beans_ , but would you believe me if I said I gave you those because I chickened out on giving you this?"

Jason continues to stare at her, puzzled, and she explains, "You told me you were interested in car mechanics, and later that night I remembered I had that—" she gestures to the book, "here at Hogwarts. My dad gave it to me a long time ago. It explains what each part of a car does with pictures and shit, and it's honestly like the auto mechanics bible—it's always open in the shop next to me when we're working."

She pauses, shrugging. "I like having it around at school because it's legitimately one of my most treasured possessions. So I figured I could make a copy and give it to you, right, because I knew your birthday was coming up."

"But then I was thinking — you don't have anyone there with you who _knows_ about cars," she continues, frowning a little. "The book's useful to me, of course, but I also have my dad there showing me how everything works in person—when I was learning, I could see how it all fit together 'cause I had a pro explaining it in real time. But you said you and your dad are learning together, so I figured I could make a few... additions."

Trini reaches across the table with her free hand—still allowing Kim to hold the other—and flips a few pages, gesturing to a little group of symbols inked in red next to a title that reads 'Alternator', then looks up at Jason. "Tap the sideways triangle with your wand. It means 'Play.'"

Jason does, and Kim's eyebrows shoot up as the image of what she assumes is an alternator starts to move on the page, so that the pictures of the individual parts arrange themselves in a line. As the five of them watch—Zack and Jason with their mouths hanging open—the whole thing starts to assemble itself slowly, like a step-by-step guide. Here and there a little text bubbles pop up, each containing a blurb of Trini's loopy handwriting, presumably explaining it all in even more detail.

"The book already gives a whole lot of information, but I wanted to add those bits to try and explain it all the way my dad did to me," Trini continues, rubbing at the back of her neck. "There're little tips and such in there too, and I got his input on all of it, so it's legit, promise. You can pause and replay — that's what those other symbols are for."

She chuckles softly and pulls a face. "Just, if you ever get rid of it, don't donate it to a muggle shop or something. I don't fancy a brush with the Improper Use of Magic Office."

"Or the Misuse of Muggle Artefacts Office," Billy adds, voice helpful.

Trini smiles. "Exactly."

"Trini," Jason breathes, blinking rapidly. Clearly overwhelmed. "I wouldn't dream of getting rid of it. I've never seen anything like this." He flips through the pages carefully, finding a set of inked symbols on the vast majority, and shakes his head. "How long did it take you to _do_ this? And—" he stops abruptly, squinting at another set of images. "Wait, did you draw some of these?!"

Trini smiles a bit shyly. "Yeah. Only where I thought it needed more visual explanation. And it took me... erm, I dunno — from that day we first talked about it to the day before your birthday, which was what, like two or three weeks? Not long."

Kim frowns. "What do you mean by saying you 'chickened out' on giving it to him, though?"

Trini hesitates for a few moments before answering. "Thought it'd come off as too... intense? We'd barely known each other two months by that point."

Kim finds herself feeling just as bewildered as Jason looks. Because this is _such_ a sweet gesture, and if Trini had done it months ago, that makes it all the more touching. She runs her thumb over Trini's hand lightly as she says, "Trin, you know I think the world of you, but you were being thick."

"Think the world of me, eh?" Trini chirps, deflecting, and Kim rolls her eyes good-naturedly.

"Thank you for giving it to me," Jason says quietly, reaching across the table and putting his hand on top of hers.

Trini gives him a genuine smile and takes a deep breath in and out. "Glad you like it. And you're welcome to come to me if you ever need help." She turns to run her hand over her own gift then—a book titled _Dragon Breeding for Pleasure and Profit—_ and flips it open. As she turns the pages, she chuckles happily at what she sees. "Okay, this is super cool."

"Planning to start a dragon breeding business, Crazy Girl?" Zack asks, only half joking.

Trini chuckles. "Not as of this moment, but this is..." she trails off, looking fascinated.

Billy smiles. "It has a list of ailments, a section on identifying dragon eggs, and a whole host of information on different dragon breeds." He pauses, gesturing to the book. "Turn to the middle, Trini. What you'll find there is the main reason I got it for you."

Trini does, turning the pages carefully to find a sleeve situated in the centre. Gingerly, she pulls out a page of parchment and unfolds it once, then again, and again. Soon she's holding a fold-out world map, styled in a way that makes it look old even though its brand new, with a sepia tone to the whole thing. It's nearly as large as Kim's throw, and Trini blinks rapidly, eyes bugging out as they fly across it. "Billy, holy _shit_ ," she whispers.

"Right?" he says, clapping a couple times softly. "Even if the book was completely blank, that map alone would be worth the purchase. You can make it bigger or shrink it and it'll stay true to form, and it shows the locations of wild dragon species all over the world! If you tap one of the dragons, a bubble shows up with their species name and a bit of information, though it goes into much more detail in the text of the book itself."

Kim peers over, shoulder brushing Trini's, and smiles. The little pictures of dragons are flying around on the map in vivid colour, contrasting beautifully with the browns and sepia tones of the map itself. A bright green one peers up at the two of them, tilts its head, then starts doing happy little flips in the air, clearly intending to impress.

Trini huffs out a soft, disbelieving kind of laugh and Kim shakes her head, humming in agreement.

"This is amazing," Kim mutters, then spots two little images of what might be magnifying glasses on either side of a scale that runs along the bottom, with a plus sign on the right and a minus sign on the left. She points to it gently, not touching the map. "Trin, what do you reckon...?"

Trini frowns. Then, tentatively, she presses the plus sign with her index finger.

The map zooms in closer. Trini's eyebrows shoot up and she presses it again, causing it to go even further in. She drags her index finger across it to centre the map more on Britain, with the other bits going off the edges, and zooms in once more. It goes a good way, and more little icons start to appear, containing additional notes about the dragon species living in the area.

"B, this is _wicked_ ," Trini says softly, pressing on the minus symbol to bring the map back to its regular, zoomed-out state.

"I wasn't even aware it had a magnifying function!" Billy says happily. "But yeah, I asked Professor Hagrid about what kind of books would be appropriate to get for someone who loves magical creatures as much as you do, Trini. He recommended a wide variety, but he owns a copy of this one specifically and he showed me the map—he's got it up on the wall in his cabin. When I saw it I thought it was perfect."

Trini sighs lightly. "I feel so..." her voice wavers a little and she trails off, making a frustrated noise, seemingly at herself. Her hand opens over her chest, hovering just above, and flexes. Smiles nonetheless, eyes bright. "Thank you."

Billy nods then looks down at the gift on the table in front of him: a handsome kit box bound in black leather. Carefully, he opens the latch that keeps it fastened shut and lifts the lid.

His eyebrows shoot up and he looks up at Kim with a brilliant smile on his face. "Kim!"

Kim smiles wide. "Had the blokes at the shop make it up for you specifically. It has all your favourite coloured inks and a set of new quills, but the highlight is the measuring tools. They're all enchanted, so it'll make any calculating you do in your projects way easier."

Billy pulls out a little pad of parchment, peering at it curiously, and Kim holds out her hand. "May I?"

He nods and hands her the whole kit, and Kim takes out the geometric compass—an instrument that looks like two small metal chopsticks fastened together with a metal ring at the top—and places it on the table, where it stands up of its own accord. "Okay, er, measure the distance between these—" she arranges two mugs on either side of it, with an empty space in the middle, "then the diameter, radius, and circumference please."

The compass starts to move about, doing a kind of walk then spinning around a few times, and a quill pops out from the kit and pauses above the inkwells.

Kim blinks. "Er, in black, please."

With a small _pop_ , the cork on the black inkwell comes out, hovering above it as the quill dips in and floats over to the pad of parchment in Billy's hand. He places it on the table, watching with wide eyes as the quill starts to record the measurements.

Once it's done, it replaces itself along with the compass in the kit.

The inkwell corks itself again too, and Billy shakes his head in disbelief. "That's _phenomenal_ ," he says quietly, as she passes the kit back to him. He stares at it, eyes travelling over all of the different tools. "And there's a little abacus here, too!"

Kim nods, smiling. "That'll work on its own, as well. Just tell it what you want to calculate." She pauses, tilting her head. "Obviously they all work manually too, so you can use them in whatever way you prefer. I just figured they might make stuff easier."

Billy blinks rapidly for a few moments then gets up from his seat abruptly, walking around the table to stand behind her. He holds his arms aloft expectantly, and Kim gets to her feet slowly, staring at him, stunned, before she hesitantly steps into his embrace. Billy hugs her tightly, and this is the first time they've hugged, _ever_.

"Thank you so much."

Overcome with emotion, Kim tries to keep her voice steady when she answers, "Yeah, of course. I'm so happy you like it."

He walks back around the table to sit down again, and the other three clearly are surprised by the hug as well. Trini looks like she might _cry_ , and Jason's smiling so wide that Kim can't help but mirror it.

Zack laughs lightly. "This Secret Santa thing was a hit, I reckon."

They all mutter their agreements, and Kim brings her blanket up to drape over her shoulders. It's one of the softest things she's ever felt.

She looks around at her friends, all so thoughtful and loving, and a warm feeling spreads through her chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'the little things that give you away' by U2.
> 
> that line at the start is a direct quote from the poem 'twas the night before christmas' by clement clarke moore.
> 
> \---
> 
> (sorry, I fucked up the posting date there. had it at january so I deleted and re-uploaded. fixed now. I'M IN MIDTERMS DON'T JUDGE ME OK)
> 
> HELLO ALL! soft chapter today. have some holiday cheer in february! why not!
> 
> first up, we have a little christmas eve get together with the kids. if you're curious, tommy was at the slytherin party at kim's insistence. cause again, she has a whole lot of friends in her House! but we WILL be seeing her at the yule ball, as kim mentioned this chapter. so look forward to that!
> 
> I'm also trying to kind of juggle the five OG rangers ie kim, trini, billy, zack, and jason with the later tommy addition. I want to stick to the OG/2017 canon in terms of them being a team BEFORE tommy comes in, and you'll get an idea of what I mean a bit more when a certain Big Fic Plot Point starts up, come the beginning of second semester. 
> 
> RE kim/jason/tommy, too, they're still working on getting back to their normal, right? kim mused a bit on this topic back in october, when they had their little trio sleepover in the dungeons. cause tommy's had jason there for her since she started at hogwarts, sure, but it can be difficult having a best friend in a different house. she had to find new people in slytherin, and they're great friends of hers now. that's her main group. 
> 
> and where kim is concerned, tommy still is a bit... hesitant? in a way. on the down low, though. she hasn't told kim that. like, they're certainly back on great terms, but... remember, kim hurt tommy too, right. not just jason. it's nothing insidious on tommy's end. she's just being more careful, I guess. and beyond what jason said when him and kim were sitting under the beech tree we haven't delved into it much yet, because tommy hasn't been hanging around our five OG kids that much as a _group_. that'll happen down the line, don't worry! but right now, she's still on the outside when it comes to group dynamics. our five have to get close together first. 
> 
> now, tommy talks a bit with trini (of all people) about this in the spring & we get a bit of a glimpse into her reasoning of not necessarily wanting to hang out with kim and jason as much when they're with billy, zack, and trini. she's kind of got that... now grown up younger sibling hesitancy, too? where she's always worried she's imposing on something, or that people are only cool with having her around because she's the token little sister of the group? if that makes sense. 
> 
> so yes. THAT IS ALL KIND OF NOT RELEVANT TO THIS CHAPTER! but just as a note. I don't want you to think I've forgotten about our most iconic green ranger. it's just slow progression that's character-based.
> 
> as for everything else, hope you liked their gifts! the interesting thing about having a story that stretches over FOUR PLUS YEARS is that I have ALL THESE BIRTHDAY AND HOLIDAY GIFTS to consider! but I love delving into the concept of invention in the HP universe, and you got a little glimpse of that with zack and trini's gifts here. trini gets some really cool birthday stuff from the kids in the upcoming summer especially.
> 
> on that note — you OG fans probably already realised this (and I've mentioned it), but I've taken all the 6 core kids' birthdays from PR canon: kim on 14 feb, billy on 1 april, zack on 3 may, trini on 9 august, and jason and tommy sharing 20 oct. where this story's concerned, jason's born in 1979 and the rest of the kids are born in '80. if you're an astrology fan, sun signs go aquarius, aries, taurus, leo, libra, libra in order.
> 
> but yes! also say hi to xander, who you've seen mentioned in passing a couple times. he's LOVELY and I'm a big fan of his. fun PR canon fact, him and trini have the same line upon being told about their ranger powers/the whole Save The World thing. it's 'what does this have to do with us?' and I LOVE that little detail.
> 
> lots of music mentions in this chapter because music is great. and you'll note the kids listening to those christmas stories on the gramophone — that's kind of my workaround for the fact that TVs don't work at hogwarts due to the whole electricity not being friends with magic thing. it's their way to keep up the little tradition that a lot of people have, where you watch those classic films around the holidays. read-along gramophone recordings exist for a LOT of older films, including some disney too! it's fucking awesome!
> 
> \---
> 
> next time on glee: the yule ball, in two parts! we end this chapter and pick up later this same evening, with trini on her way out to the festivities. look forward to all of the kids dressed up for a fancy party!
> 
> thank you as always for your readership and comments, guys. you fill my life with JOY. take care <3


	41. Menswear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/1v07ywlVYd02pOCnXRBDNA?si=-w3YUvBJStS7o8E94i584g). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Trini checks her dress robes one last time in the mirror and sets out for the Entrance Hall, taking a deep breath in and out. They've all agreed to meet at the top of the marble staircase before the Yule Ball and go in together.

The _click-clack_ of her heels echoes through the warmly-lit corridor outside her common room, and as she turns toward the stairs she finds Zack sitting there waiting. He's dressed in all black robes with a thigh-length suit jacket, smart emerald green tie, and pocket square to match. His hair seems to be more tamed than usual and adds an extra few inches to his height.

He looks great.

"Hey, Crazy Girl."

Trini smiles at him sincerely and exaggeratedly curtseys. She's wearing a long, open-backed, V neck dress in a brilliant yellow gold that ends a bit above her ankles. The top is held up by double spaghetti straps that go up and over her shoulders, crossing in the middle of her back, and she's charmed the bottom to shimmer slightly as she moves.

Zack's eyes catch on it and he whistles lowly. "Mate, that's so cool!"

She scrunches her nose at him, remaining silent as they begin to ascend the narrow stone flight of stairs together. Finding herself oddly becoming more and more at ease as they go. He always seems to have that effect on her.

Zack, on the other hand, is chattering away next to her as they walk, evidently quite nervous. "You ready for this? Should be fun. I'm quite stoked to see The Weird Sisters play. I wonder if..."

As they enter the Entrance Hall from the door to the basement Trini faintly registers Zack asking her something.

And there are a few stragglers in the hall around them, but her mind is elsewhere, having just spotted the two girls standing at the top of the marble staircase.

Trini stops dead in her tracks.

Kim and Tommy are waiting on the landing, off to the side and chatting lightly. 

Tommy is facing them, dressed in an emerald green fitted suit and a black dress shirt with a shining silver pocket square. Her hair looks brilliant—the tight curls have been slightly altered from their usual afro style into a kind of up-do—she's pulled the sides back so that all of the volume is entirely on the top and back of her head, with plenty of strands stylishly falling down her forehead to just below her eyebrows.

And though the six of them had all agreed to go to the ball together as a 'group date', Tommy's outfit almost perfectly compliments Zack's.

They're kind of cute. And normally, Trini would smile at this. But she seems to have misplaced her jaw on the floor somewhere.

Because... _Kim_.

Trini continues to stand there like an idiot, having forgotten how to do much of anything.

Kim is wearing a high-necked, dark green dress that stops just above her knees. The back is entirely open to the base of her spine and the colour has a depth to it that twinkles in the torchlight. Her choppy shoulder-length hair has the same effortless wavy look that it usually does, though she has sleeked it back on one side for the occasion; she looks both regal and incredibly cool.

Clearly smiling and laughing lightly, Kim's angled slightly away from them when Tommy puts a gentle hand on her forearm, nodding once towards the bottom of the staircase.

Kim turns, eyes searching for a moment before she meets Trini's gaze and positively _beams_.

Trini feels Zack's light hand on her back guiding her forward discreetly. She's never had a problem walking in heels, but he seems to have noticed that she was rooted to the spot for... other reasons.

With him guiding her out of her reverie she begins ascending the stairs slightly ahead of him, flicking her gaze between Kim and Tommy in effort to make her staring less obvious.

As they climb the last few steps, Trini is focusing all of her energy into keeping herself composed.

Zack grabs her hand gently and gives it a squeeze, then walks away from her and up to Tommy, who is the same height as him in her black stiletto heels. He holds out his hand to her and bows a little, entire face lighting up in a smile as they begin talking lowly. Tommy mirrors his expression back at him as a light blush creeps across her cheeks.

Trini's totally going to tease him about this later.

Kim strides up to her, eyes sparkling. "Bloody hell, Trin. You look gorgeous." Without taking her eyes off Trini, she tilts her head slightly in Zack and Tommy's direction. "Taylor, you don't clean up so bad either."

And Trini finds herself _incredibly_ glad for the concealer potion she applied, as its entirely hiding the blush that she knows has just bloomed across her face.

With their eyes still locked on one another Trini responds in kind, trying to keep her voice even. "Right back at you," she breathes, then pauses to inject some lightness into her tone. "Should I go in there and tell everyone to go home? 'Cause, _wow_..." Trini waves her hand to indicate that she's talking about Kim, stalling as she tries to get her words out. "Really nothing else to see tonight, is there?"

Kim eyes crinkle as she laughs brightly, genuinely amused and shaking her head, and Trini feels like she's fucking flying. Zack sails in and drapes an arm around Trini's shoulders, looking Kim up and down affectionately.

"Damn Hart."

It's all he needs to say to get the sentiment across, and Trini finds herself agreeing.

More to have something to say other than 'You're beautiful' over and over again, Trini looks around pointedly and asks, "Where're Billy and Wonderboy?"

Tommy answers from her place beside Zack, nodding towards the Grand Staircase, "Here they come, speak of the devils."

Billy and Jason are speed-walking down the stairs towards them, having met a bit earlier to help each other get ready. Jason's wearing a fitted, rust red suit and a sheer white shirt with the top two buttons undone; Billy sports a royal blue suit, polka-dotted bow tie, and a crisp white shirt. They both look exceedingly handsome.

Coming to a stop on the landing, Billy begins talking in rapid-fire, "Sorry guys, I couldn't seem to get my lapels right and my dad used to say that a man always needs a smart suit. I want to get a photo to give to my mum. Do you like our socks? Look!"

The two of them each grab a pant leg and pull it up slightly, revealing matching white dress socks with moving multi-coloured dinosaurs on them.

Billy looks giddy and Jason stands there at ease, a carefree smile on his face. He meets Kim's eyes then whistles lowly, making a silly face and holding his hand out to her as he begins goofily shifting his weight from foot-to-foot in mock dancing.

Kim takes it with a grin and Jason spins her slowly, theatrically mouthing "Wow!" and bowing to her. He looks at Tommy in the same manner for a couple moments then swoops her up in a hug, spinning once before letting her down.

Adjusting his hair carefully, Jason waggles his eyebrows at Trini. "Lookin' _mighty_ fine tonight ladies," he croons, in his best American old-timer impression. "Whadya say? Wanna see what all the fuss is about and go where the night takes us?"

Trini chuckles at his antics, her heart warm and full. She holds out her hand tentatively to Billy, looking at him gently in question, and after a brief moment he smiles and takes it. To her surprise, he holds his other hand out for Kim to take, which she does happily.

Jason claps Zack on the shoulder, and they all stride down the marble staircase and into the Great Hall together.

They've purposefully arrived to the Ball a bit later than the rest of the castle, not wanting to stand around waiting to witness all of the tradition and ceremony. And as they walk through the open doors into the crowded Great Hall, Trini peers around in awe. The walls have been enchanted to look as if they're made of ice, and there is endless garland and mistletoe crossing the starry ceiling. There must be a hundred round tables scattered around the hall, each softly illuminated by a lantern in the centre.

The whole place is dimly lit, creating a picturesque and romantic atmosphere filled with happy conversations and the light _clang_ of cutlery on plates. Trini didn't realise how hungry she was until right this moment.

She's tugged gently towards the back right side of the hall, where a few tables sit unoccupied in the corner.

They come to one and Kim sits down next to her lightly, reaching out and inspecting the gold plates and cutlery with interest. Billy looks down at his plate and confidently says, "Pot roast and mashed potatoes with gravy, please."

Nothing happens for a few moments, and Jason peers at Billy's plate curiously.

It fills with food at once, and Billy smiles around the table at the rest of them. "I saw one of the Durmstrang girls do it as we were walking over," he explains, picking up a little menu and waving it with a _wobble_.

Jason promptly orders the same thing as Billy but requests a side of Yorkshire Pudding as well. Tommy asks for roasted chicken with potatoes, and both of their faces light up when their food quickly arrives.

Noting the little text at the bottom of the menu that says 'Requests Permitted' Trini stares down at her own plate for a bit, contemplating.

She looks over at Kim, who's already watching her with a soft smile.

Trini raises her eyebrow in silent question and Kim shakes her head lightly, looking a bit dazed. Trini holds her gaze for a moment, eyes warm, before looking back down at her plate. "Er, chocolate chip pancakes? Please?"

Another brief wait and they materialise in front of her, stacked four-high and steaming, along with side dishes full of blueberries and strawberries. With a small satisfied hum, Trini picks up the little maple syrup boat and begins pouring it on her food happily.

"Oh my _god_ ," Zack whispers, gazing at her food with longing in his voice before turning to his own plate with a pleading look. "Waffles with poached eggs, sausages, and hollandaise. Please and thank you."

Meanwhile, Kim's still staring at her plate, seemingly at a loss. "Man, if I thought Hogwarts could actually whip up what I want right now..."

Trini considers this, cocking her head to one side. "Why not? Could just ask—if it doesn't show up in a couple minutes you can order something else."

"Don't wanna be a pain..." Kim mutters, grimacing.

Trini hums. "Kim, it's a special event. If there's any time to ask, it's tonight." She shrugs. "Can't know until you try."

Kim seems satisfied with that answer. She crinkles her forehead, hesitating for a moment before addressing her plate, "Alright, can I have _kadhi chawal_ , please... or, wait— if you know how to make Gujarati _khichdi_ , could you sub that for the regular boiled rice, please? And some _chapati_ if at all possible? Er, please?"

Trini smiles as she watches. Kim being excessively polite is one of the multitude of things she does when she's nervous or shy, and it melts Trini's heart a bit.

_GAY. Pull yourself together._

Kim sits back and prepares to wait patiently, with the air of someone who's trying not to get their hopes up. Trini grins at her and they sit there together, Kim popping a few of Trini's blueberries into her mouth as they wait.

After a couple minutes go by, though, Kim shrugs. "It's cool, I can totally just get something els—"

She's interrupted by her requested food appearing.

Kim tips back slightly, surprised, then leans forward tentatively, spearing her fork into it, picking up some and blowing on it softly to cool it down. Trini looks around the table—everyone is watching Kim fondly with the same soft smiles on their faces.

She tastes it and straight up _moans_.

At the unholy sound, Trini finds herself feeling dizzy. She faintly registers that she may just pass out right here, right now, on Christmas Day, wearing her fancy dress in her fancy shoes at this fancy party.

Slightly comforting is the realisation that, at the very least, her pancakes will provide enough of a cushion to prevent her head from smacking against the table.

Trini quickly employs her regular method for dealing with situations like this: picturing the Responsible Side of her brain fending off the Very, Very Gay Part (which, incidentally, can currently be found flouncing about in her conscious mind like a ballerina).

As she visualises politely beating it back with a stick, Trini stares daggers at her empty goblet. "A Butterbeer, firewhisky smoke, and a double-spiced mulled mead, please," she requests quietly, eyes narrowed at the glass as if it has personally offended her.

Because god, she needs a drink. Or five.

Zack pushes against her with his shoulder playfully. " _There_ you go. Let's get this party started, shall we?"

He brings his goblet up to his mouth like a microphone and orders six shots of firewhisky for the table, followed by six butterbeers, a gillywater for Tommy, and two glasses of oak-matured mead for Jason and Billy. Technically they're not of age to be drinking hard liquor, but it seems those rules have been relaxed a little for tonight.

"Single best decision I've ever made in my life," Kim mutters thickly, now shoveling food into her mouth with abandon. "Who knew they could actually _do_ this?"

And as she waits for her drinks Trini's gaze falls on Jason, who's looking at Kim with a glint in his eye. He seems like he's trying to decide something.

After a moment he nods to himself then twists around in his chair, tipping it slightly to reach the empty table behind theirs. Grabbing one of the unused gold plates, he brings it back to the table, clearing room beside his own plate and placing it there.

Jason elbows Tommy and starts talking lowly, with the two of them soon having what looks like a full-blown conversation with the plate that lasts for about a minute. Once they're finished Jason glances up and meets Trini's eyes with a mischievous smirk, and he winks at her.

The drinks appear: her beer is ice cold, there's smoke billowing out of the top of her firewhisky glass, and the mead she ordered for Kim is pleasantly warm to the touch.

_Perfect._

Trini slides the mead over—which Kim accepts gratefully—before taking a sip her firewhisky and watching Billy as he smiles at his plate and orders chocolate cake for dessert.

They're all eating and drinking in silence, comfortably enjoying one another's presence, when Jason leans over the table and deposits a full plate in front of Kim with a flourish.

Kim looks up from her own plate—which she has _just_ polished clean with the help of her _chapati_ —to peer at the intruding dinnerware. In a second, her eyes widen comically.

Curious, Trini leans over. It looks to be a selection of desserts, and if Trini knows Jason, they're some of—if not all—Kim's favourites.

"Jase, what the—"

Jason stops her with a raised hand. "I've been at your house for Christmas, K. Many, many times," he says, smiling softly. "And I know _I'm_ more homesick than usual, given we all normally would've been home a week ago, but I've at least been able to eat foods that I associate with the holidays, you know?"

He gestures around vaguely. "Same with everyone else. Like, Zack's mum sent him that _massive_ bundle of her signature solstice sweets last week; Billy's mum baked biscuits; I know for a fact that Tom has a secret stack of _sim-sims_ under her bed that she's been washing down with her dad's spiced chai 'cause she _gave me some_ of both—"

"Your betrayal stings. I feel attacked," Tommy says, clutching at her chest and leaning back in her chair.

Jason smiles. "And we all know Trini places special orders with the kitchens—"

"I've no idea what you're talking about," Trini deadpans, inspecting her nails casually.

Holding Kim's gaze, Jason continues, "But Mumma Kim always takes a few extra shifts at the hospital this time of year, so my guess is she hasn't been able to smuggle you anything into the castle..." he trails off, then pauses. "I dunno. You never wanna ask for nothing 'cause you're always worried you'll impose, so we did it for you."

He waves his hand around again and shrugs. "Like Trin said, it's a special occasion! And I know you're seeing your mum tomorrow... but we saw the opportunity to give you a piece of home tonight. Why not, right?"

Kim's entire face is split in a brilliant smile. "You're a thoughtful guy, Jason Scott. Thank you," she mutters, inspecting the plate which is piled precariously with sweets. "And _Merlin_ , you've a good memory. How on earth did you, a white boy, manage to remember all of these names?"

Tommy gives her a little wave in explanation, and Kim laughs, blinking a couple times and shaking her head. "You're both now obligated to share these with me." Gingerly, she hands Jason a stack of what look like thin, spiral donuts, as well as a tiny glass dish full of a thick pinkish-white milky liquid. "I seem to recall you eating your weight in _jalebi_ that one year, Jase. Mum was thrilled."

She pauses and looks thoughtful for a moment; hesitant. Her voice gets softer as she speaks again, "And… not to be a _huge_ nerd, but you guys really are my home, too. Even if we all spent the winter holidays on the moon it'd still be special cause we'd be together, you know? But like, it'd be really nice to have these too... Trin, try this—"

Kim hands her a tiny plate with what looks like a deep fried... something dipped in a thick white sauce.

"Okay," Kim starts, clearly excited. "This is basically… deep fried batter with raisins that's been submerged in yoghurt. You can put these—" she places two tiny dishes in front of Trini, "on it as garnish. No pressure if you hate it, but these're like, some of my favourite things in the whole world."

Trini spreads both of the pastes contained in the tiny dishes—which she knows to be chutneys—onto the dessert and takes a bite, smiling as she recognises one of the tastes.

She chews a bit more. "Holy, are there more of these?"

Kim laughs and places two more on Trini's plate, delighted.

Trini goes on to try a good five more of the desserts, and she loves every single one. Kim passes some to Tommy as well, who makes a show of shoving a bunch into her mouth at once.

Regrettably, once Trini's done, she also feels like she might explode.

There's a smattering of applause towards the centre of the room, then—the Champions have taken to the dancefloor to begin the festivities proper with the opening dance. Trini looks over at them lazily, and much of the table copies her.

"Blimey, Granger looks _good_ ," Kim mutters, quirking an eyebrow.

Jason peers at Kim, eyes twinkling. "Go dance with her, slick!"

"Hah, hah," Kim deadpans. "Krum'd knock me out. Though I could well use some shuteye after all that food..."

Trini nods her agreement. "Could go for a nap right about now too," she mumbles, leaning back contentedly and keeping a keen eye on Cedric.

He's doing really well, and she smiles wide as she watches.

Kim drains the last of her mulled mead and cracks a butterbeer. "I'd fancy a dance but I also don't wanna die, so maybe we give it a bit? Until we all feel like we can move again?"

There are nods around the table in easy agreement.

Having finished up her other drink, Trini sips her beer as they all sit there watching. Kim takes two shots of firewhisky back-to-back and blows air out of her mouth quickly, shaking her head like a dog.

A few minutes later Tommy downs two shots as well—she had already ordered a bunch more for herself—and holds her hand out to Zack over the table. "So, Taylor? Dance with me?"

Zack looks at her fondly and takes her hand, then turns to address the table, "Alright lads, it's been nice knowing you."

They get up to walk over to the packed dancefloor, and Trini soon loses sight of them in the crowd.

The four of them that remain sit there for another ten minutes or so, chatting and reveling in the atmosphere, before Kim gets up slowly and seems to test the viability of her legs for a moment.

"I reckon the risk of me being sick everywhere is now below fifty percent," she declares happily. "What do you think, guys?"

By way of an answer Jason and Billy get up in unison—both slightly teetering under the influence of their consumed drinks—and Trini follows.

They all make their way to the dancefloor and start dancing like idiots. The Weird Sisters are playing, and Jason watches the stage in awe. "Man, Kim, do you remember us jumping around on your bed and singing to these guys? Or your dad waltzing your mum around the kitchen whe—" he stops abruptly, eyes widening a little.

Kim looks up at him with a sad smile. "Hey, don't worry. You can talk about it, it's fine."

He looks massively apologetic and gently takes her hand, spinning her slowly. She smiles and they go into a silly waltz, twirling around in time with the music.

Gia, Summer, and Chip, along with a whole host of other Hufflepuffs, come to join them a bit later; Cedric saunters up to Trini soon after, fairly tipsy already and beaming.

"Small," he greets simply. "Care to dance with me?"

Trini mimes fanning herself. "Tall. That'd be delightful." They come together and start to dance in a happy little jig. "How goes it? Where's Chang?"

He shrugs, adjusting his hand on her waist. "She's around here somewhere. Isn't she _beautiful_ , though?"

Trini smiles at how his eyes have gone all buggy. "Absolutely. You did good, kid."

The two of them dance like that, gracefully as can be. And from where Cedric was originally with the whole dancing bit, he might as well be a pro now.

Cho comes back in after a song or so, looking between the two of them with a happy smile. "May I cut in?"

Trini returns her smile and goes to step back, catching Kim's eye over Jason's shoulder, but Cedric holds up a hand. "Just have to run to the loo quick. Be right back." He takes Cho's hand and kisses it like an absolute dork, but she blushes a little at the gesture. With that, he departs through the crowd.

"Well..." Cho says, looking at Trini. "Want to dance until he gets back?"

Trini smirks. "Sure you can handle it, Chang?"

"If I can handle _him_ , I can handle you."

"Good answer."

The song that The Weird Sisters are playing picks up, going into a faster tempo, and the two of them start dancing a bit outlandishly.

It's a whole lot of fun.

Cedric comes back after another few minutes, and Trini steps back as he flits by her, kissing her on the top of the head for good measure and swerving in to grab Cho by the waist.

"Kept her warm for you," Trini says lowly. "I _do_ want that autograph later, though. Think you could sign my arse?"

Cedric spins with Cho a little and looks over her shoulder at Trini. "Fuck off," he says cheerily.

"Love you too, Handsome," Trini drawls, as a hand appears held out in front of her—Jason's. She takes it and he spins her back towards him, Kim, and Billy, and the four of them continue to dance together, going through at least five more songs and taking little breaks here and there.

Zack and Tommy join them somewhere near the middle and start a conga line, which eventually becomes a massive affair, with almost a hundred people snaking together around the dancefloor.

"Drinks?" Kim murmurs into Trini's ear, squeezing her waist once. Trini jumps slightly in surprise and immediately chastises herself for being ridiculous.

"Yeah." Trini puts her hand on Zack's shoulder and relays the message—him and Tommy elect to keep dancing for a bit—and they leave the line with Billy and Jason to walk over to the drinks table.

They weave through the packed crowd and once they're in front of the table, Trini blinks rapidly. It holds _hundreds_ of bottles in varying colours, shapes, and sizes, all arranged neatly about.

And admittedly, she doesn't think she's ever seen this much alcohol in one spot in her life, outside of a pub.

Kim apparently has the same thought and quickly snags an entire bottle of firewhisky from the seemingly endless supply, along with two more butterbeers for herself. Trini rolls her eyes good-naturedly as she grabs a couple butterbeers as well.

As Jason and Billy stock up on drinks too, Kim leans in close to Trini. "How would you feel about going for a walk with me in a bit? Could stand to get outside... it's crazy hot in here."

And there's something in Kim's bright eyes that Trini doesn't recognise, but she doesn't dwell on it.

"Sure," Trini replies, giving her a warm smile.

Kim returns it, and they all begin making their way back to their seats.

As they're winding through the maze of tables—which have been pushed much closer together to make room for the dancefloor—a pretty Slytherin boy who Trini recognises from the standoff in the corridor last week comes up behind them and taps Kim on the shoulder.

"Hey, K. Would you like to dance with me?"

Trini's stomach starts churning, and it's definitely not because of the food she ate earlier.

Kim smiles up at him. "Sure Ter," she replies happily, then turns to Jason. "Jase? Could you do me a big favour and bring these back to the table? I'll be there in a few."

Jason nods and takes the bottles from her, now carrying five in total. Kim flashes a soft smile in thanks, then squeezes Trini's hand. "Be right back."

Despite her insides clearly protesting, Trini smiles at her in return. "Have fun," she says, trying to keep her voice light. Kim takes Terence's hand and he leads her to the dancefloor, where they quickly vanish into the crowd.

Trini opens her beer as soon as the three of them get back to their table. Dropping into Tommy's vacated chair with a slight huff, she takes a long pull from it.

Billy eyes her curiously from beside Jason. "Trini? Is everything okay?" Jason bumps her shoulder with his as they both peer at her with concern.

Trini smiles tightly—she needs to _chill._ "Yeah, no worries B. Just a bit tired from the dancing."

Jason's looking at her like he really, really doesn't believe her. But he doesn't push, electing to pat her shoulder softly with his giant hand instead. Billy starts telling them about the history of the Triwizard Tournament, and Trini soon finds her mind pleasantly distracted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'menswear' by the 1975.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO! yule ball time! we have some wholesome interactions here. and yes, the kids went as a group date, but zack kind of sort of asked tommy as his date as well. so tommy technically has THREE dates, jason and kim included. popular girl!
> 
> & I love tommy interacting with the kids. it's such a great dynamic that's slowly developing, and like I mentioned last time, we will slowly be seeing more of that as this story goes on.
> 
> but yes, I know we saw the yule ball from harry's pov already in GoF but I wanted to show our kids having a nice time too! 
> 
> as for the food, that ordering method with the plates is entirely a thing that actually happens in canon. everything is delicious and made me hungry to describe! most of the stuff is google-able, but I'd imagine sim-sims are probably harder to find? they're these little sesame seed desserts that are... dope and addictive. aaand, hm. kim gives trini dahi vada, the gujarati versions of which are often sweet! not really a dessert per se but if you're me, or generally determined enough, you can eat them ANYTIME! FUCKING LOVELY! (and I'll have you know that chapatis are like, some of my favourite things on the planet, and I was eating one as I wrote this. delicious.)
> 
> as for trini wearing a dress over a suit or something, remember, this fic is a blend of both OG and 2017 film characterisations. so those of you more used to reading fics from authors that solely draw from 2017 stuff are probably more accustomed to her dressing a bit more butch/less femme, as it were? and that's not to say that she wont ROCK a suit in the future, because she will! she does both! and wizarding society is less like, conforming to gender roles than the muggle world canonically, of course. so fear not. tommy was a stunner in a full suit, here. and a little nod to PR with jason and billy's dinosaur socks! picture zack's suit jacket as more tuxedo-leaning, longer with a tail, which is partly due to the more muggle influence in his case. trini's dress is golden yellow, like I said, but the style is a blend of the two red dresses becky g wore to the latin music awards in the last few years.
> 
> now! have some Gay Activity on both kim and trini's part! absolute disasters! they're trying their best. but both of them look SMOKIN and there's ONLY SO MUCH THEY CAN PLAY IT COOL YAKNOW.
> 
> witness the return of kim's aforementioned crush on hermione (who can blame her, really) and trini gets a little jealousy flare when our sweet son terence asks kim to dance. HE DID IT VERY PLATONICALLY, MIND. but trini doesn't know that.
> 
> offscreen and during one of their brief breaks in the dancing, the kids got pictures at a wizarding photo station set up for the yule ball specifically! billy mentioned wanting to get a photo for his mum before they went in. IT IS THEIR FIRST PICTURE ALL TOGETHER! there will be a bunch developed, and they signed a little registry to know which photos belong to who. the wizard doing the photos is exactly what you'd picture — this smiling old dude with a scruffy beard and giant bottle glasses wearing a tweed vest and trousers. they'll each get copies of the pictures down the line, but it isn't like, instantaneous or anything. as per HP canon, the film has to be developed in a special potion so the photos MOVE!
> 
> but yes, the reason you didn't see it in-text this chapter is because it's shown in a flashback down the line. SO YEAH!
> 
> \---
> 
> next chapter: seems kim wants to go for a LITTLE WALK OUTSIDE WITH TRINI ALONE! what is she planning!?!?! what is she thinking!?! we shall SEE!
> 
> thanks as always for reading, everyone. I'm in midterms/have stuff going on so a bit shorter chapter and a/n this week! take care <3


	42. Day I Die

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/3ysiD7ZgsPc3xgGJ59DpS7?si=SE6BBfRHSoOHC-c_s2oNbA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The three of them are laughing together some time later, no more than a few songs gone by, when Jason turns his head to the left to look at something behind Trini.

Trini feels two warm hands on her bare shoulders as Kim's low voice sounds from above.

"Mind if I steal Trin, boys?"

Jason smiles warmly, cracking open another butterbeer. "You ladies have fun, now."

Kim gives Trini's shoulder an affectionate squeeze then reaches over her to grab the small bottle of firewhisky that sits in the middle of the table. "Thaaaaank you!" she sing-songs, winking at Billy.

Taking her hand, Kim flashes Jason her most blinding smile and pulls Trini gently away from the table, towards the doors to the Entrance Hall.

And god, Trini is _too gay_ for this.

Because yes, she knows this is a thing that girls do—the whole holding-hands-to-get-through-the-packed-crowd bit—but she's fairly sure her heart is doing a happy dance that involves some quite elaborate flips and jumps regardless.

In any case, as they make their way along the edge of the packed dancefloor Trini can't help but look around the room and smile. One of the Weasley twins is dancing elaborately with another girl from the Gryffindor Quidditch team, so much so that everyone else is giving them a wide berth for safety. Professors McGonagall, Sprout, and Flitwick are taking turns spinning each other around, laughing.

It's all kind of perfect, actually, until they're moving through the last stretch of the crowded room and Kim is shoulder-checked roughly by a blonde girl in a purple dress.

"Oh _hey_ , Kimmy. Didn't see you there," she says, voice faux cheery and sharp, like soap bubbles flash-frozen in the air and shattered over concrete. "Reckon I would've, given the size of your big mouth and all."

Immediately in fight mode, Trini growls and steps in front of Kim, right into the offending girl's space—thanks to the heels, Trini's just a couple inches shorter.

Kim's still clutching her hand and tugs on it a bit, trying to gently pull her backwards.

"Trin, don't—" she starts, barely audible.

"Do you have a problem?" Trini says lowly, not making to move.

The girl sneers, disgust plainly evident on her face. "Not with you, honey. I'm not gonna make your life any harder, given I'm sure you're not yet aware of the rubbish you've been hanging around—"

Kim sighs tiredly from behind Trini. "Just... get out of the way, Amanda."

But Amanda ignores her, still staring Trini down. "You tell your friend about your tendency to be a cold-hearted, hypocritical bitch, Kim? Or do you want me to share with the class?"

There's a brief, coiled pause.

"Trini knows what I did to you," Kim says softly, and Trini squeezes her hand.

And Kim steps around then, movements deliberate and smooth, spine straight; just enough to partially block Trini with her body and get between the two of them. And all at once she's carrying herself in a manner that's... entirely new to Trini, her entire person radiating an unequivocal zero tolerance for bullshit in way that could easily command armies.

"Mandy, I've apologised over and over," Kim says, tone steady but frustrated. "That doesn't make it better, I _know_ that, but all of this—" she nods between her and Amanda, "it needs to stop. I'll keep saying it until the day I die—I'm so, so fucking sorry. But this _needs_ to stop."

Amanda watches her for a few moments with something like cruel fascination, then takes a single stalking step forward. "How does it feel, knowing you deserve it?" she asks quietly.

Kim stares back unblinking, expression torn between what Trini knows to be overwhelming guilt and the instinct to defend herself.

After another moment of silence Amanda leans close into Kim with a triumphant glint in her eye, moving so their faces are mere inches apart. "It stops when I _say_ it does."

And yeah, okay — there's an argument that could be made for letting Kim handle this on her own. Namely, she's an _extremely_ talented witch and a very capable person in a whole variety of areas. She clearly doesn't need defending.

But there will always be a limit on how much Trini can stand by and do nothing.

_That's enough._

In a flash, Trini's discreetly reached behind herself to access the hidden sleeve fixed in the back of her dress. Still holding Kim's hand, she shifts her weight and nudges in front of her again, gently easing her backwards—

Now sandwiched between them, Trini presses her wand to Amanda's collarbone.

And when her voice emerges from her throat it has the fury of consuming, blazing fire but renders remarkably steady; a nuclear bomb explosion with the volume turned down, unquestionably dangerous as she growls, "No, _puta_ , this stops now. Either you walk away right this second, or one of your knockoff _Barbies_ here—" she tilts her head just barely, indicating the two girls flanking either side of Amanda, "gets to carry your arse up to the hospital wing in a bucket when I'm done with you. Your choice."

Thankfully the wand at her neck seems to provide additional persuasion points, because Amanda steps back once.

She smacks her lips obnoxiously and breezes past them then, her friends following. "Bye, Kimmy," she calls over her shoulder. "Be seeing you and your attack chihuahua around soon."

As the adrenaline drains out of her, Trini becomes intensely aware that the entire length of Kim's body is pressed flush up against her back. She feels Kim exhale a shallow breath on the right side of her head and turns around to meet her eyes. "Hey, you okay?"

Kim stares back at her with a stunned expression: mouth slightly open, eyebrows so high up her forehead that they threaten to disappear into her hairline.

Trini searches her eyes and nods to herself. Glancing down, she takes the firewhisky out of Kim's grip then tugs gently on her hand, leading through the remainder of the crowd.

They enter the cavernous Entrance Hall in silence, the happy raucous sounds of the Ball behind them fading into a low thrum as they go. The firelight from the torches dances down the dark walls and across the ancient stone floor, finding their faces in a flickering warmth that causes an inexplicable feeling of calm to come over Trini.

As they exit through the open front doors, still hand-in-hand, she lets out a deep exhale. 

The sight before them is nothing short of breathtaking: a large section of the grassy grounds at the foot of the castle has been transformed into a fairy-lit grotto, full of elegant bubbling fountains dotted throughout a gorgeous array of manicured magical greenery that looks as if it could have been thriving there for centuries.

Trini guides Kim down the front steps and into the chilly night air, walking the winding stone path past dense clumps of rosebushes and large statues. It's fairly empty, the evening quiet around them.

After turning onto a smaller path she soon finds a spacious stone bench set in a corner. It's very private, and they have a lovely view of an illuminated fountain through a gap between bushes. 

With a wave of Trini's wand a light golden cashmere shawl emerges from the second hidden sleeve in the folds of the fabric of her dress. As she brings her wand around in an arc, guiding it, she's reminded of muggle magic tricks and drawing colourful handkerchiefs out of nowhere.

And though cashmere is already incredibly warm, she's charmed it to be even more insulating than the sheer fabric would suggest, given she was planning to don it if she got cold at all during the Ball.

She uses an Engorgement Charm to make it thicker, more blanket-like, then mutters, " _Geminio_."

The result is two massive thick cashmere blankets, one which she uses as a cover for the bench. Taking a seat, she pulls Kim down beside her, then drapes the other over Kim's shoulders.

Conscious of keeping hold on Kim's hand, Trini pulls the cork out of the firewhisky bottle with her teeth and shoots it out of her mouth. Takes a long swig. The liquid burns on its way down her throat, though not unpleasantly, and she offers the bottle to Kim.

Gaze fixed ahead and eyes glassy, Kim takes it with a soft word of thanks and blinks her tears back. Lost in thought, she indulges in a hearty gulp then places the bottle on the frigid stone ground between their feet. They're both buzzed already as a result of drinking all evening, the edges of Trini's vision softening ever so slightly.

Kim abruptly stretches her arms out like a bat then, spreading her blanket over Trini's shoulders as well. With a snap of her fingers the blanket magicks together of its own accord, keeping the warmth in without one of them having to hold it closed. Their hands still entwined, Kim brings her head down to rest on Trini's shoulder.

And it's incredibly warm and comfortable, here, outside in the middle of a Scottish winter.

They spend a few minutes like that, sitting together and staring at the fountain, before Kim shifts a little. Speaking from her place on Trini's shoulder, her voice shakes slightly, "Thank you for what you did, Trin. I don't..." she trails off, sighing. "I don't understand how I'm supposed to approach this situation, you know?"

Trini hums, and her voice comes out much softer than usual when she says, "We've talked about this before, and you said it in there—you've apologised a hundred times to her." She shakes her head a bit. "There's nothing you can do to take it back. She has to stop terrorising you about it."

"I..." Trini continues slowly, trying to be careful with her words, "I know you, so I understand that a large part of you thinks you deserve this—to be tormented in punishment for what you did. And _she_ clearly knows that too. But we can't spend our lives making up for the things we've done wrong, Kim. Sooner or later, you have to forgive yourself, too. I said the same thing to you a month ago."

After another few moments of silence, Kim starts running her thumb across the back of Trini's hand. "Wanna know a secret?"

Trini nods gently, waits.

"I used to think I was... sort of destined for the wrong side of everything? as stupid as that sounds. 'Cause..." she trails off, then sighs. "Merlin," she curses, voice rough.

There's a momentary pause where Kim seems to steel herself. "My dad, Trin... he's a Death Eater."

Trini's breath hitches as she processes this new information, but she squeezes Kim's hand in reassurance, prompting her to continue.

Kim takes a shaky breath in. "Outside of the other Slytherins with family in the Dark Lord's service, there're only a few people who know." She pauses again, swallows. "But I'd no clue when I was younger — it was only after my mum tossed him out that my dad passed all those stories down to me. Talked about the war as if it was the best time of his life."

She sighs, jaw flexing. "When I was little, I used to trace his tattoos—including his Dark Mark, though I didn't know what it was—with my fingers. I thought he was so... cool. I looked up to him so much..." she trails off again, and Trini can feel her pulling away; not physically, but something in her is bracing for rejection.

Trini untangles their hands for the first time since they left the table in the Great Hall and wraps her arm around Kim's shoulders, pulling her in even closer. Her other hand takes its place, and she squeezes again to let Kim know that she isn't going anywhere.

That seems to put Kim at ease for the moment, and she nuzzles her head further into the crook of Trini's neck.

"You were just a kid, Kim. You're not a bad person for looking up to your father."

Kim lets out another heavy sigh and nods. "Well, you've met my mum and I told you what happened there: her and my dad split up a few years ago. _That_ was the reason—he admitted all of it one night and she freaked out, of course. I told you that she realised my dad 'wasn't a good guy', but I'm sure you get the depth of that now."

She hesitates. "It wasn't all bad before that, though? Not in the slightest, actually. They really did love each other, and this sounds mental, but he was an amazing father to me."

Kim squeezes Trini's hand once. "Everything I said to you in Hogsmeade— that's still true. I haven't spoken to my dad in a year and a half, and I'm working unlearn all of the rubbish he tried to put in my head. This whole thing with Amanda, it just... it's a constant reminder that changing isn't as easy as waking up one day and saying 'I'm going to be better'. It's a long process, and it's _hard_."

Trini rests her cheek against Kim's head gently. "Hey, you're doing a great job. And I'm not just saying that because we're friends. You're so incredible—kind, and warm, and... benevolent," she says quietly. "I can speak for the rest of the gang when I say we're here with you, and we're going to continue to be. We've got you, okay?"

Reaching down, Trini grabs the bottle of firewhisky again, bringing it to her lips and taking another solid gulp. She hands it to Kim, who removes her head from Trini's shoulder and takes a long draw as well, finishing it off. Trini waves her wand and both the empty bottle and the cork go sailing into a bin nearby.

They sit in a comfortable silence for another minute, watching the lights from the fountain shimmer in the darkness. Out of the corner of her eye Trini sees Kim reach up to the high neck of her dress, and her hand lingers there for a moment.

Kim makes a small hissing noise under her breath, then turns her whole body towards Trini and smiles. "There's... someone I want you to meet."

Trini turns to Kim properly as well; their faces only a foot apart now. She glances around, confused and half-expecting a person to pop out of a rose bush. 

Nobody appears, though, and with a slight raise of an eyebrow she stills, looking into Kim's eyes. Questioning.

In response Kim runs her index finger along the neckline of her dress, and as she does, it starts to _move_. Trini suppresses the urge to jump back but leans away slightly in surprise.

In front of her eyes, what she thought was the neck of Kim's dress transforms into a small, hot pink snake.

"His name's Ptero, and he's my pet corn snake," Kim explains, smiling. "He wanted to come along and see the Ball and stuff."

Trini processes this and something clicks. "Hang on. The choker necklace you're always wearing? That's...?"

Kim nods. "I got him in the summer after second year, and I've learned to disguise him quite well. He's not exactly a... permitted pet at Hogwarts, but I'm sure I could get permission if I wanted? It's more that I don't want people to get the wrong idea. Snakes tend to get a bad rap."

Stroking him softly, she continues, "He likes to coil around my neck during the day, but I've a pocket sewn into all of my school robes right behind the crest where he naps sometimes. If you've ever seen me wearing that thick bracelet, too? Yeah, that's him."

Kim angles her head downward slightly and makes another noise in the back of her throat, and Trini realises she's _talking_ to the snake.

"Wait. Kim..." she lowers her voice to a whisper, "you're a Parselmouth? God, you're dropping a lot on me tonight." 

And Kim's face changes, suddenly unsure. But Trini shakes her head and reaches her hand out towards Kim's neck tentatively, looking up at her in question.

After a moment Kim hisses softly down at Ptero again, and he comes out to meet Trini, wrapping himself around her hand. She's never been _afraid_ of snakes, per se, but she's never been a big fan of them either.

It seems that Kimberly Hart can change her mind about a lot of things.

Trini smiles as Ptero regards her curiously. "Can you tell him 'Hi, I'm Trini Gomez', that it's a pleasure to meet him, and that I'm sorry we haven't met sooner?"

"Is that a very, _very_ weak callback to the day we met?" Kim asks, clearly amused.

Trini scoffs, feigning offense. "You got it, didn't you?"

Kim smiles again. "I did."

Trini watches Kim address Ptero with a string of hisses, relaying the message. From his place on Trini's hand, he turns around to Kim and produces a tiny hiss back. She responds, and they go back and forth for half a minute.

It's kind of adorable.

_Trini, nO._

"He says he's happy to finally meet you, too."

Trini raises her eyebrow. "Is that all? You guys were chatting for a bit there."

Kim smiles, almost shyly. "Yeah. He mainly also wanted to say that he's heard a lot about you."

Trini moves her hand—and Ptero—over to Kim's neck again, and the proximity to Kim has her heart beating so fast that she feels light-headed. Ptero slithers back around Kim's neck and bops his head up against the bottom of her jaw in an affectionate gesture.

Kim strokes his spine and disguises him again, though now that Trini knows he's there, her neckline seems a bit more... alive than before.

Smiling, Trini gets up from the bench and holds her hand out. "What do you say we go back in? The gang probably thinks we froze solid out here."

Kim tips her head back and smiles goofily, taking Trini's hand and standing up. "Yeah."

They walk back into the castle hand-in-hand, then enter the Great Hall once again.

.

As Kim walks through the doors, she can't help but feel a little bit elated.

She's holding the hand of a beautiful girl—one who she trusts and appreciates more than she can say—and her friends are at a table across the hall, laughing and joking together. Everything feels... good, in this moment.

Admittedly, this isn't exactly how she was expecting tonight to go. Her time outside with Trini was supposed to be different, but it worked out okay in the end.

_Best not to rush with all of this, anyway._

As they stride toward their table Trini squeezes her hand again, and Kim feels like the luckiest person in the whole fucking castle.

Ptero pipes up from his place around her neck, barely audible, " _Couldn't help but notice that your pulse has been racing the entire time you've been holding Trini's hand, Kim. Care to comment?_ "

She scoffs quietly and hisses back, " _You know right well what my pulse racing means. And the fact that you were so keen to tell Trini that earlier is straight-up betrayal on your part. You're supposed to be on my side!_ "

Ptero lets out his version of a chuckle. " _I just wanted to say how lovely it was to meet the person who causes your heart to beat like a drum every time you see her. That's not betrayal, it's friendship._ "

Kim scoffs again and falls silent as they reach the table. Her and Trini sit down next to each other and Jason raises his eyebrows at her, asking how it went.

Her response is a barely-there shake of the head. They will talk about this another time.

It's past midnight and the Weird Sisters have just finished playing. The Great Hall is clearing out around them, with students and staff sleepily heading to bed.

As if on cue, Zack lets out a wild yawn. "So, guys? Bedtime? My pillow and I have a hot date and I really, really want to be on time."

Trini laughs. "You're so stupid." Pauses, smiling. "To be honest, though, I feel the same. Can't wait to get out of this dress."

Kim feels her cheeks turn pink and she hopes it isn't noticeable, but Jason discreetly looks over at her again. Though his face doesn't change, his eyes are twinkling in absolute delight.

She glares right back at him, knowing full well she's going to get teased about this later.

Tommy gets up slowly and stretches. "What do you say, Kimcam? Shall we?"

Kim smiles at her and gets to her feet as well. "Friends, it's been fun. I haven't had this nice of an evening in a long time."

Everyone at the table nods and makes noises in agreement, all calling it a night.

And as they leave the Great Hall, Kim tries to savour the moment. She's with people she loves and, minus the near-throwdown earlier, she couldn't have asked for a better time.

Everyone bids each other goodnight and a happy New Year before splitting off, given they're all leaving early tomorrow morning to go home for the remainder of the Winter holiday. Jason, Billy, and Zack each wave as they ascend the marble staircase, with Kim, Tommy, and Trini lingering at the bottom for a few moments, needing to take separate paths to get down to their common rooms.

But Tommy starts walking towards the door that leads down to the basement. "Come on Trini, we'll walk you."

Trini scoffs. "That's _really_ unnecessary."

"We know," Kim returns, shrugging. "But we're gonna do it anyway. You know how stubborn _I_ can be. Tom's, like, ten times worse—"

"HEY!" Tommy says, punching Kim lightly on the shoulder. Kim smiles, regarding Trini with a twinkle in her eye.

Trini looks between the two of them and huffs, playfully shoving past Tommy and leading the way down into the Hufflepuff basement.

They descend the narrow stone steps and turn the corner into the warmly-lit corridor. Walking in comfortable silence, the three of them stop as soon as the stack of barrels that lead to Trini's common room comes into view. Kim isn't entirely sure how their intruder-repelling system works, but she's heard it involves vinegar.

Ten yards away should be a safe distance, right?

Without even considering it, Kim smiles down at Trini and pulls her in for a hug. 

And... wow. This is the first time they've hugged, _ever_. They fit perfectly together. Forget butterflies in the stomach; they've fluttered up and invaded Kim's rib cage as well.

_Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh._

As they separate Kim briefly registers that it's probably the firewhisky making her feel braver than usual, but she goes along with it. "Just wanna say again that you look incredible. Er... yeah," she breathes. Pauses as her brain stalls for a moment, then smiles. "Thank you for everything tonight, and I'll see you in a few days."

There's so much more Kim wants to say, but she holds herself back.

Trini smiles lightly. "The Belle of the Ball title belongs to you, I think. And thank _you_ for trusting me. Be safe, okay? Tell your mum I say hello."

Turning away with her dress shimmering in the torchlight, Trini adds, "Tommy, I'll see you around, you stunner."

Tommy waves playfully. "Bye, pretty lady. You look fit as hell!"

And as Tommy turns to go back the way they came, Kim waits for a few moments, watching Trini walk the rest of the corridor. When she enters the passage to her common room, Kim lets out a breath.

" _Your heart is racing again_ ," Ptero hisses from her neck, amused.

Kim scoffs and responds quietly, " _P, I know!_ "

Tommy clears her throat obnoxiously. "Stand there drooling any longer and I'm gonna jinx your shoes to the floor, Casanova," she drawls, already waiting at the base of the stone steps at the end of the corridor.

With a roll of her eyes Kim spins around and marches towards Tommy, casually trailing a hand along the wall as she goes.

Setting her face to impassive, she reaches the end of the corridor and promptly sails straight past Tommy, through a passage hidden behind a large tapestry.

Beginning to carefully descend the stone staircase, Kim hums once. Not turning around, she mutters, "I've zero idea what you're on about."

"At least have the decency to look at my beautiful face when you lie to me," Tommy returns, laughing from a few stairs behind her. "Don't the Bisexual Lore say that you gotta, like, meet people's eyes when you're spewing bullshit?"

Kim smiles and shrugs one shoulder. "Eh, bullshit's my default setting, love," she chimes, voice light as she waves her hand around. "All that's more like guidelines, besides."

She pauses for a beat, a note of mirth spinning into her tone, "The Deep Magic is... very understanding when it comes to _duplicity_ , after all. You should know that, as part of the trickery domain."

Tommy groans loudly, though Kim gets another solid laugh out of her too. 

And Kim's always liked this passage—it goes neatly underneath the Entrance Hall and into the dungeons, especially useful for the times when you don't want to be seen carrying a bottle of ginger ale and box of chips from the kitchens to your dungeon common room at ridiculous times of the night.

Not that she has any experience doing that, or anything.

Kim continues to descend as she considers her words. "What makes you think that, anyway?"

"Man, you've gotta be kidding me," Tommy answers. "I've never seen anything more obvious in my life. Can't tell if you're pulling my leg, though."

"I'm not. Just curious," Kim says, then pauses, trying to keep the insecurity out of her voice as she drops the pretense completely. "Everyone _but_ her seems to've noticed."

And her efforts to be sneaky seem to be in vain, because as they come to a small stone landing, Tommy rests her hand on Kim's arm gently.

Kim turns, and she knows her self-doubt is shining all over her face now—she can feel the way it pulls at her features. She tries to scrunch up her nose playfully to hide it, but Tommy sees right through her, nearby torchlight dancing in her eyes as she searches Kim's face. "Hey. Hey, kid. Listen. I tease you a lot, I know. But you're great. You're very, very great." She moves a hand up to cup Kim's jaw gently. "You're lovely and a rad Quidditch player and you're loyal and true and _good_ and I'm super lucky to be your friend."

Tommy pauses, sighing. "Under that rather prickly and quite... tiny exterior, Trini seems to be a big fan of yours. Whether or not that is, or develops into romantic feelings is another story. But you've only been hanging out for, what, four months now, innit—"

"Like, _every single day_ though, Tom. I feel like I've known her forever, you know?"

Tommy smiles warmly. "And maybe you have, love. Who'm I to speculate on matters of the heart and the soul and shit. But for now, you are Kim, she is Trini, this is Hogwarts, and you've known each other _four months_ in total."

"Does when we almost collided on the Quidditch pitch count? 'Cause if so, it's more like nine mont—"

Tommy holds up her hand with a smirk. "Shut up, please." She pauses, and her voice gets softer, "Now, I obviously don't see you two interacting on the daily. But when I _do_ , there's definitely a spark there. Clicking with someone instantly is a rare and kind of beautiful thing, I know that." She pauses, sighing. "But you have to give this time. Don't count yourself out yet — I don't wanna hear that insecure tone from you, understand?"

Kim looks up at her shyly and nods.

"That said, come to me if you need to talk out any insecurities," Tommy adds, looking into her eyes. "Or whatever have you — I'll listen all day. Just hate to see you doubt yourself."

They smile at each other then turn to continue walking again, quickly descending the last few floors to get to their common room. Kim notes a tinier-than-usual noise coming from her neck and smiles; Ptero is snoring softly.

Coming to the correct level, they walk left down a narrow corridor then make another left into a larger one; the _click-clack_ of their heels the only sound in the otherwise comfortable silence.

They hang the final left turn, the green dungeon lamps illuminating their faces in the darkness, and Kim begins to hum to herself. She's ready for bed.

"Thanks, Tom," she whispers, looking over at her.

"No need," Tommy replies, then pauses, looking contemplative. "Do you remember that pep talk you gave me after that idiot boy broke my tiny heart when we were like... five?"

Kim smiles at the memory. "I seem to recall recommending that you punch him in the nose. Which you did."

"I did. And that was excellent advice, because I've not let _any_ boy ever make me feel like that again since. Consider this me returning the favour. I refuse to allow you to doubt yourself, no matter how pretty the boy _or girl_ in question is. Okay?" They both stop walking and Tommy turns to face their destination: a familiar blank stretch of wall. "Er, Rosebush."

The wall doesn't move. Kim cocks her head, trying to remember the new password. "Rosebush... thorns?" she tries, looking at Tommy curiously.

It slides open to admit them.

"Merlin, when _will_ we be saved from this wall's emo phase?" Tommy mutters, strolling into the common room.

Kim smiles, trailing in her wake. "You know that you're great too, right?"

"I'm great and you're a peach. We're _both_ great, which is probably why they put us in the _Great Slytherin House..._!" Tommy says loudly, spinning around the empty common room with both arms outstretched, addressing the ceiling.

Kim chuckles as they approach the door to the girls dormitories.

To the right of the doorway sits a silver bust of a smart-looking wizard with a pointed beard, who opens one eye and narrows it at them disapprovingly. "Full of ourselves tonight, aren't we ladies?"

Tommy blows him a kiss as they walk through the door. "Goodnight Phineas, love you too."

"Night Phinny," Kim croons, which is quickly followed by an exasperated, dramatic sigh sounding from behind them.

"I _told_ you not to call me that, Kimberly!"

They both chuckle softly as they walk down the dark stone corridor. The wall on the left is decorated with art pieces, tapestries, and paintings, and the wall on the right is entirely lined with doors.

Tommy stops at hers. "Love you," she breathes, embracing Kim tightly.

Kim smiles softly as she hugs her back. "Love you." 

Once they separate she continues two more doors down, entering her own dormitory and removing her shoes with a content, happy sigh. Padding over to her bed, Kim gently extracts Ptero from her neck and places him in his enclosure on her nightstand, where he curls into a little ball unconsciously.

With that she prepares for bed, and at long last collapses onto her mattress with a grunt. 

And as Kim lays there staring up the curtained ceiling of her four-poster, her heart still feels warm. It's not the feeling she would have... expected either, given she's gotten into the habit of not sharing much about herself unless it's absolutely necessary. Over the last few years, she's come to see personal information as a transaction or a disclaimer; never an offering.

But tonight she felt like she could tell Trini anything. Hell, she _wanted_ to. And oddly enough, despite the fact that it by definition made her extremely vulnerable, there isn't any kind of regret or anxiety rearing its head as she lays here, pondering it all in the dark.

If anything, Kim feels lighter, almost.

She remembers the feeling of Trini's hand in hers earlier and smiles to herself, smushing her face into her pillow like a little kid.

Tonight was amazing, and she's so, so lucky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'day i die' by the national.
> 
> \---
> 
> that's a wrap on the yule ball, folks!
> 
> say hello to the amanda interaction I mentioned a few updates ago. this was trini's first proper time being right in the middle of it (literally). and it was ALSO her first glimpse of... the person kim used to be/still is, when kim's whole energy and demeanour shifted, there. the 'command armies' bit.
> 
> because that is a HUGE part of kim, right. at a bare-bones level, her character is rooted in the archetype of a 'fallen hero' who was on the Bad Side of things, but who's now on the way to redemption. it's a very tough thing to write well, and it's certainly a slow process. 
> 
> and note! that this capacity to lead and to command largely came from just _how many times_ we saw kim in the 2017 film step into a leadership role—the ability to take charge definitively and unequivocally was there in SPADES and it had me DIZZY with the character implications. we'll explore this much more in time, but some lines of hers that might jog your memory include: 'help me pick him up' 'this is what matters' 'we're going to angel grove' 'hold onto each other'. like, these are PIVOTAL moments!!! it's bananas! and there are SO many more but yes, more on that later. in short, she is a FORCE.
> 
> moving on — hope you liked that one-on-one interaction between trini and kim. they're slowly learning more about each other. trini met ptero! she knows about kim's dad! stuff is progressing. 
> 
> as for kim's intentions in proposing that whole bit of alone time with trini in the first place... had things been different kim might just have been Drunk Brave enough to SAY something, or get heavier on the flirty stuff, or even be a bit suggestive. but amanda derailed that whole vibe before it could get going, unfortunately.
> 
> but yes, it seems that they're both nursing crushes, hmm? regular friendly reminder that this is A SLOWBURN, tho. like... again, the most slowburn to ever slowburn. so while they won't get together any time soon, stuff is going to start to get a bit more... tense in the next few months. YIKES! 
> 
> fun fact: the hufflepuff common room entrance does INDEED canonically have an intruder-repelling system that involves vinegar. kim was wise to stay back.
> 
> meet phineas nigellus black! the very same phineas who has a painting in the headmasters office AND in grimmauld place! he was a slytherin headmaster back in the day and guards the door to the girls' dormitories.
> 
> now, that interaction with kim and tommy is very pure. they poke fun, of course, but they've always got each other's backs. very much a sister relationship between them. I love their dynamic. & that little comment about tommy being part of the trickery domain is a reference to her trans-ness! they have little jokes like this, as queer kids and magic users, that are part of this universe. tommy joked about kim's bisexuality and kim tossed one back at her, as they do. (to be clear, cause you all don't know me personally, I don't mean that nefariously, like 'trans people are tricking the world'. that is NOT what I mean at all. TERFs get the FUCK off my story before I find you.)
> 
> the trickery domain/trickster gods etc (if you want to read about it) = a longstanding part of myth across a whole variety of cultures. it's a title tommy plays with due to the whole... not embracing norms or conventions bit. if you need a reference, think someone like loki from norse mythology, who is both a trickster god and gender-fluid by our modern definition! but yeah, it's just another subset of little jokes and references queer magical kids make, like jason and kim and their bisexual invisibility, or their intrinsic love of unicorns. I've constructed and built it out in-universe by playing off modern day queer internet culture, of course, but it also dips into the real world international lexicon when it comes to mythical and legendary creatures/people/occurrences. just a fun little element of this story, and you will see more as we go along!
> 
> as a note on trans-ness in the HP universe — magic can make a whole lot of cool things possible with a wave of a wand that we can't do instantaneously in the muggle world. so once again, queerness is NOT a big deal whatsoever in-universe and this is of course included in that. the amount of queer characters in this story will speak to that as we go on. but yeah.
> 
> anyway, hope you enjoyed the yule ball. I know we didn't get a trimberly slow dance, but they really aren't there yet in their relationship. PATIENCE MY FRIENDS. (if it helps, I'll have you know there are multiple slow dances between these two in the future)
> 
> \---
> 
> next time on glee: kim's pov as she goes home for the holidays. we get to see her mum again! and meet some of her other pets!
> 
> thanks for reading, all. take care <3


	43. Pretty Thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/1XkSnol29SUFx7OaFo3vpb?si=X5ngBlfKRnOcq2Uqq6tquw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Kim wakes the next morning with a headache. As her eyes flutter open, she sees that two of her roommates—Tracey Davis and Daphne Greengrass—are up as well, while Pansy and Millicent are still fast asleep.

Stretching, she slowly leaves the warmth of her blankets in favour of starting to get ready to go home. Her mum is picking her up in Hogsmeade at nine o'clock, where they'll be taking the Floo network back to their house in London. Kim's feet touch the floor and she sits there for a moment, then looks at her clock—she has just under an hour to get herself together and walk over there.

"Morning, sleepyhead," Tracey whispers, smiling at Kim over the top of her open trunk. She's sat on the floor folding clothes—it's something she's always insisted on doing without magic; she told Kim a couple months ago that it helps her think.

"Hey," Kim returns quietly, not wanting to wake anyone up.

Daphne walks over and deposits a mug of black coffee on Kim's night table, then reaches up to put her light brown hair into a messy ponytail. Smirks down at her. "I know that _you_ know you're hot so don't take this the wrong way, but you look like you might need this."

Kim scoffs and rolls her eyes, picking up the mug and bringing it to her lips. "Thanks."

The coffee is delicious and she sits there sipping it for a moment, looking out across the room at the massive floor-to-ceiling windows that peer out into the lake. These girls, she was surprised to discover, were all very welcoming when she moved into their dorm at the beginning of this year.

Admittedly, Pansy _could_ have been nicer, but for her, the absence of any kind of mean comment was basically equivalent to her laying out the welcome mat and throwing a 'You Moved In!' party.

They all knew what happened between her and Amanda and they had been remarkably cordial regardless. Considering the circumstances, Kim counted herself very fortunate.

Kim pulls on her slippers and pads over to her desk, picking up her earrings from the night before and storing them in her jewelry box. She tossed her stuff everywhere last night—her shoes are heaped on top of her trunk, her dress is (thankfully) draped over her desk chair, and there are bottles of hair potions and face products still scattered all over her desk.

She organises it all quickly then changes into a pair of dark jeans and her black Slytherin Quidditch crewneck, pulling her holster onto her left forearm and stowing her wand there. She already packed her trunk yesterday, but she peers around her space with narrowed eyes, trying to figure out if she's forgotten anything.

As Kim goes to walk into the bathroom, Tracey speaks to her quietly from her spot on the floor again, "We're going up to breakfast in a few, Kim — wait up okay? Daph just has to get her arse in gear..."

Kim nods and looks back just in time to see Daphne roll her eyes and send a balled-up sock soaring at Tracey's head.

She smiles as she starts to brush her teeth; hearing them bickering lowly over the running water.

Once she's washed up and ready to go she strides back into the room. The other two are still arguing—they grew up together, from Kim's understanding. They fight constantly, though it always seems to be more playful than anything.

Daphne addresses Kim, pulling her heavy travelling cloak around her shoulders, "You have to go into Hogsmeade too right? Wanna take one of the carriages over with us after we eat?"

Kim smiles. "Yeah, sure. Didn't even realise the carriages were running, actually. Was going to hike it over there." She pulls her own travel cloak on as well then walks over to Ptero's enclosure. " _Time to go, love,_ " she hisses, quietly enough to not be overheard.

He slithers up her arm to her neck, and she carefully picks his vacated enclosure up and stows it in her trunk. There's another at her house in London, but she knows that he prefers this one.

She shuts her trunk and charms it to follow her, winding a dark green scarf around her neck (and Ptero) as she walks, then moves to the door to put her boots on. Tracey is waiting there already, smiling fondly as Daphne whips like a tornado around the dorm, grabbing things and tossing them into her trunk with surprising accuracy.

"You're a decent shot under pressure, eh?" Kim teases, though she's quite impressed.

"I tend to utilise a wide array of surprising and useless talents when confronted with meaningless time constraints," Daphne mutters, leaning backwards out of her wardrobe to throw a deadpan look at Tracey.

Buckling her trunk and placing her tawny owl, Jambalaya—who she apparently named when she was six—on her shoulder, Daphne glides over to them and magicks her boots to lace themselves up quickly.

They all walk out of the dormitories together, with Kim turning around as they cross the common room to call, "See you later, Phinny!" in a cheery tone. She knows he hears her, but he seems to be ignoring her on account of the nickname. One of his favourite activities is pretending to be asleep.

Chatting lightly, they exit the common room, walk through the dungeons and make their way up to the Great Hall.

The hall is back to its regular self, though a surprisingly small number of students are scattered around the House tables. They're all looking tired—most still in their pajamas, but some are dressed to leave the castle as well. From a few of their greenish-looking faces, it looks as if Kim's not alone in her appreciation of a good firewhisky.

The three of them eat fairly quickly then pile out of the hall, maneuvering around where some other students are saying their goodbyes. The carriages are apparently leaving on an as-needed basis, so nobody is in a real rush.

Just as they're about to go out the main doors of the castle, Kim hears her name echo through the Entrance Hall.

"Bye, Kimberly!"

She recognises the voice easily and spins around, face lighting up. Billy's standing at the top of the marble staircase with a piece of toast in his hand, wearing his navy blue pyjamas with trains on them and waving at her enthusiastically.

"Bye Billy!" she shouts back. "Happy New Year!" She waves at him and blows a kiss as she turns back to walk down the front steps.

Tracey and Daphne are waiting for her, loading their trunks onto an empty carriage.

"Your friends are... interesting," Daphne mutters, her tone unreadable.

Kim's heckles rise on instinct, though she tries not to jump to conclusions. Daphne is a hard person to gauge. "What do you mean by that?" she says, stowing her luggage and attempting to keep the fight out of her voice.

Daphne meets her eyes and her face softens a bit. "It's not a bad thing. That guy is just..." she trails off, seemingly considering her words. "He helped Trace last month when Sprout had us re-pot those bouncing bulbs, remember? One started flipping out and gave her a black eye—would've probably broken her nose or something if he hadn't stepped in front of it and knocked it back."

She pauses, tightening the straps holding her trunk in place. "Like, none of us've ever said a word to him. And I'm sure some of our group has been shitty to him in the past."

Kim nods. She remembers.

Tracey hums, tipping her head a little, long blonde hair reflecting the soft morning sunlight as she blinks slowly. "Malfoy, the prat, saw when the bulb started to get aggressive and just laughed." She pauses and sighs lightly. "It's not like Cranston saved my life or anything, but it was kind. I didn't deserve that from him."

Daphne takes Jambalaya off her shoulder and pets her head gently, before raising her up quickly to give her leverage to take off. She watches her owl fly upwards, looking thoughtful. "I said he's interesting because he's just... I dunno. Genuine, I guess. It's refreshing to see that people like that exist," she mutters, shrugging.

Kim nods, deflating. "He's one of the most genuine people I've ever met."

She steps up into the carriage and the other girls follow her.

Tracey closes the door and with a bit of a lurch their Thestral-drawn carriage starts moving in the direction of the gates. "Where're you meeting your mum, Kim?"

"3B. What about you guys?"

At the question, Tracey and Daphne share a dark look. Daphne seems to hesitate, then speaks, "My mum, to be frank, is an arse. She and Tracey's mum've never gotten along."

"Not for my mum's lack of trying," Tracey mutters.

Daphne's brow furrows and she sighs. "It's the typical shit. Trace here is a half-blood. Her mum's a pure-blood, dad's a half-blood." She turns to fully face Tracey, her mouth twitching slightly, "I've always said that makes her more of, like, a three-quarters blood than anything..."

Tracey smacks her on the shoulder and Kim smiles.

"You've been—" Tracey huffs, starting to poke Daphne in the ribs with both hands, who laughs loudly, eyes scrunched up but bright, "saying that same line since we were little! How can your jokes _still_ be so awful?"

Daphne waves her hand, still chuckling a bit. "Anyway, Kim, the last time they were in the same physical space, my mum was coming to pick me up from Trace's house, right. We were like, ten. And all she did was stand inside the doorway, where _regular_ people would just make friendly small talk—"

"And to this day, neither one of them'll tell us what happened—" Tracey adds.

"But it ended with Trace's mum literally charming an entire drawer of rubbish—spatulas, ladles, that type of shit—to chase my mum out of her house," Daphne finishes, smiling wistfully at the memory.

Kim stares at them, her mouth open in disbelief.

"Yeah," Tracey says. "So we've made an effort since then to keep them away from each other. Long story short is my mum's grabbing me from the Hog's Head, and Daph's mum'll be in 3B with you."

"Which is going to be a JOY!" Daphne says, in a voice somewhere between a whine and a sing-song. Slinking down into her seat, she throws a pointed look at Tracey then meets Kim's eyes. "Prepare yourself. Hope your mum's ready to rumble."

"Lovely," Kim mutters, her eyes widening slightly.

They pull into Hogsmeade—which is entirely covered in new snow, looking like a postcard—and all three of them hop out of the carriage. Kim starts to get her baggage down first, and Tracey and Daphne say their goodbyes behind her.

Once they're all ready to go, Kim waves at Tracey. "Bye, Trace. See you in a few days."

"Later, K. Send me an owl if anyone ends up at St. Mungo's!" she says cheerfully, turning away from them and walking down the street towards the Hog's Head.

Kim stands there blinking for a moment, then turns to Daphne with a silent—and only half-joking—question on her face.

Daphne just stares at her. "Man... I'll shout our address and casually toss her into the Floo fireplace myself if I have to," she mumbles, waving her hand around. "Though I don't see why she'd be any more rude than usual to your mum—they don't know each other. She'll probably just be cold, nothing to worry about." She flashes a grimace at Kim, looking a tad bit unsure.

Kim smiles, turning to follow her inside. "It's not even your mum I'm worried about..." she mutters.

They walk through the doors of The Three Broomsticks and Kim quickly spots her mum sitting at a little booth near the back.

"Hi," Kim greets happily, crossing the pub and pulling her into a hug.

"Hi _beta_ ," Maddy returns, squeezing her tightly and peppering kisses on top of her head.

Kim pulls away with a goofy smile and gestures to Daphne. "This is Daphne, she's one of my new dorm-mates."

"Daphne, honey. It's nice to see you again," Maddy says warmly, though she looks surprised.

Kim looks between them in confusion.

"Wha—"

The door chime _dings_ and a tall witch walks into the pub. She's wearing a midnight blue travelling cloak and an expensive-looking pointed witch's hat. And though they've never met, Kim would know she's Daphne's mum from a mile away—they look extremely similar.

Spotting them, she starts briskly walking over. As she does, her eyes seem to light up in recognition.

"Healer Shafiq. A pleasant surprise," Daphne's mum greets Maddy, not unkindly.

Kim's mum offers her hand, and the women shake. "Nice to see you, Phoebe."

Mrs. Greengrass regards Kim curiously, holding out her hand again. "Kimberly Hart. Forgive me, I didn't make the connection, Maddy."

Kim shakes her hand politely then steps back to her mother's side. She looks sideways at Daphne, who makes a silly face at her from slightly behind Mrs. Greengrass' back.

And Kim's not sure _what_ happened, but somehow Daphne seems to be way more comfortable with her now than she was even a minute ago. Her entire person seems... lighter. As if she's just put down a heavy weight she was carrying.

Because the vast majority of the time, Daphne is borderline cold—and Kim's come to determine that it's not because she actually _is_ cold as a person; it's a learned behaviour. To see her looking younger all at once, so much more silly and not as serious, is kind of nice.

Maddy smiles and addresses Mrs. Greengrass, "Nor did I. Kim only told me the first names of her new roommates. I just put it together a moment ago, same as you."

Kim feels her mum's hand find hers, giving it a reassuring squeeze, and she relaxes a little out of habit. She's still looking between the three of them though, trying to figure it out—Mrs. Greengrass called her mum 'Healer' so they must know each other from the hospital, in some capacity.

In her effort to be polite, she tries to hide her confusion.

Mrs. Greengrass seems to pick up on it, though. "Your mother has been treating my very ill daughter—Daphne's younger sister—for years. There is no other Healer our family trusts with her care."

Maddy smiles softly. "Flattery. But you know my affection for Astoria."

To Kim's utter surprise (and what looks like Daphne's horror) Mrs. Greengrass offers a very small _smile_ , her gaze flitting between Maddy and Kim. And Kim knows it's sincere, but it's sort of quirky in its appearance—as if her mouth is trying to remember the correct muscles to use.

Mrs. Greengrass nods at the two of them curtly, then. "Well Kimberly, it was my pleasure meeting you, and I hope to see you again in the future. Maddy, I must say, I'm very happy to know our daughters are living together. We'll be seeing you very soon." She pauses, pushing a little embroidered drawstring bag into Daphne's hand without looking at her. "Time to go, Daphne."

With a final nod and a swish of her cloak, Mrs. Greengrass abruptly turns and strides away from them in the direction of the fireplace, taking Daphne's trunk with her.

Daphne theatrically mouths, "Time to go, Daphne" behind her mother's back, which earns her a chuckle from Kim. She begins walking backwards and waves sincerely at the both of them as she says, "Bye, Kim! Happy New Year! And I'll see you soon, Maddy!"

"Bye honey," Maddy replies, waving back. Kim waves as well, and Daphne dips her hand into the fancy drawstring bag, throws some Floo powder on the fire, and disappears into it after her mother.

The two of them stand there for a moment, Kim still holding her mum's hand.

"Well, that was weird," Kim chimes, perching on the edge of the heavy wood booth table and looking up at her mum.

Maddy chuckles. "A little bit, yes. Unexpected, more so." She pauses for a moment. "Phoebe was... very hard at the beginning. Better now, though."

"That's _better_?" Kim asks, though she's not surprised, given the story she heard in the carriage.

In lieu of an answer, her mum says, "They've had a very hard time, is all I can say. Perhaps Daphne will tell you about it one day."

Kim raises her eyebrow as she deadpans, "Tracey and Daphne told me a story on the way here that involved Tracey's mum charming blunt kitchen utensils to chase Mrs. Greengrass out of their house."

"Ah," Maddy mutters, pausing. "Yes. Blood-status related, I'd venture to guess? They seem to subscribe to that whole... thing. Phoebe probably recognised my last name the second she met me, but I hadn't told her anything about your father beyond that I was married once and had separated. I have mentioned that I had a daughter Daphne's age at Hogwarts, too, but nothing more. I try not to get too personal with patients or their families."

Kim's eyes widen. That would mean—

Maddy seems to read her mind as she shakes her head, then sits beside Kim, bringing her hand up to her mouth and kissing the back of it. " _Beta_ , it's fine. You said that many of your peers in your House know about your father anyway. It is unfair that I've the luxury of being able to walk around without consequence or association with him, while you have no choice but to do the same and have others make incorrect assumptions about you."

Her mum's voice becomes even softer, "Remember, Hart is _your_ last name. You just happen to share it with your father. It is not something to be ashamed of; I changed my name back to try to distance myself from the memory of him, but not from you. I could not be more proud to be associated with the Hart name, because it is _yours_ , and you are my whole world."

She shrugs. "The entire hospital can chat about it if they would like. For all I know, with a family like the Greengrass', the knowledge of your father's... membership may actually _boost_ the respect they have for me. I would bank on it, actually."

Kim grimaces. "I'm still sorry. Don't want to ever jeopardise your work, mum."

Maddy clicks her tongue and hops off the table, moving to stand in front of Kim and bending at the waist to meet her eyes, taking her face in her hands gently. "Kimberly Ann. It was me who chose your father, and us who brought you into this world. It is me who should be apologising, once again, for not putting him through a barrage of tests and examinations before I wed him."

Kim chuckles, her eyes shining slightly. "Can you imagine? Bringing a Sneakoscope to a date and slamming it down on the table: 'So on a scale of one to ten, how much do you like darkness, generally? Do you have an affinity for secret clubs? Do you enjoy being a shitty person?'"

Her mum laughs and kisses her in the centre of her forehead. After many years of immeasurable pain caused by the whole situation with her dad, they've progressed to being able to joke about it.

It still isn't easy, and it hurts a lot sometimes, but having each other is their saving grace.

They both get up, and Maddy cranes her head down a little to hum at Ptero affectionately. He pops up out of Kim's scarf and her mum scratches under his chin, cooing down at him in Parseltongue, " _Hello, my sweet boy. I have a fun task for you when we get home: there are mice in the garden shed._ "

Ptero bops her finger with his head in response. Maddy waves one hand lazily at Kim's trunk and tugs on Kim's hand with the other, beginning to walk them towards the fireplace.

" _You're going to be a stone heavier by the time we get back to Hogwarts, P_ ," Kim says, chuckling.

" _I am very excited_ ," he hisses back, retreating underneath her scarf once again in preparation for the Floo travel.

Hugging Kim's trunk to her front, Maddy goes through first and vanishes in a flash of emerald flame.

Kim steps up to the grate. " _Okay, you know the drill: keep your eyes closed and your mouth shut. Squeeze my neck a bit tighter when you're ready._ "

Ptero does, and she grabs a handful of Floo Powder from the little box on the mantle, which her mum already paid Madam Rosmerta to use.

" _Alright, P — big breath in!_ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'pretty thing' by dizzy. such a lovely song.
> 
> \---
> 
> hello! here we are, on our way into the winter holidays away from hogwarts!
> 
> meet tracey and daphne. kim hadn't referred to them by name prior to this in-text because I didn't want to throw a zillion secondary characters at you when we started. it's a slow process, and now you're meeting them officially! as we go, more characters will start to pop up, of course. hogwarts is a big place!
> 
> but yes. they're quite the pair, truly. right out of HP canon, along with pansy and millicent, who you should recognise from the books. for clarity — kids moving dorms is something that I'd imagine doesn't happen often at all. but the kim stuff was an extenuating circumstance. so she's been in this one since september. rose alluded to this back in... chapter 4? I believe, when she mentioned that kim wasn't her roommate anymore.
> 
> kim's current roommates know she has ptero but aren't aware she's a parselmouth, for the reasons kim mentioned last chapter when she was talking to trini in the grotto. in chamber of secrets, you remember how harry was treated after word got around that he had that particular skill, so it's understandable. 
> 
> on that note! you SEE HERE that kim's mum maddy is ALSO a parselmouth! how curious, eh? the nature of that will be explained fully in... two years in-fic time, almost to the day. but for now, kim gives you a bit of a rundown in the next chapter while thinking about something else. also note maddy's maiden name, shafiq. that's straight out of HP canon, and is one of the names included in the pure blood directory [list](https://www.wizardingworld.com/writing-by-jk-rowling/pure-blood). both kim and jason have family names on that list, with his mum's maiden name being 'fawley'. this will become important later. but yes. kim's bloodline has been... PAINSTAKINGLY crafted by me. more later.
> 
> now, meet mrs. greengrass! she's a complicated lady, and she'll feature down the line here and there. that bit about daphne's younger sister astoria being chronically ill is out of HP canon, too. she's two years younger than kim and daphne, but she spends a lot of time in the hospital. still technically goes to hogwarts, but I like to think that there are things in place for educating kids who can't get to the castle physically for health reasons. NOW. unfortunately for me, cursed child is technically canon, though I tend to ignore it the vast majority of the time. but if youre curious — by that story, astoria is draco malfoy's wife down the line, and the mother of scorpius malfoy, who's a main character in the play. but that won't be relevant to us.
> 
> that bit about daphne acting lighter is just because of the surprise familiarity there with kim's mum, and now that kim knows about astoria, it's a bit... easier. not that astoria's condition is a secret, per se, but daphne doesn't go around announcing it. so yes.
> 
> as an aside, I know you've seen them plenty of times already in this story, but I hope you like the slytherin (and hufflepuff!) dormitories. we never see them in canon, but I've little sketches of what I'd imagine they look like, and I've extrapolated on the small bits of canon info we get from JKR on that front. 
> 
> with slytherin's common room in particular canonically having windows out into the lake, I figured it'd make sense for each of the dorms to have them too. so there's this sort of... aquatic? feel almost, which is super cool. slytherin's natural element is water, too, by what JKR has said, so I figured it appropriate.
> 
> also, note: hogwarts is built on a cliff canonically, with the black lake below. given slytherin's common room does indeed look out INTO the lake, that would have to mean, logically, that it is WAY FUCKING DEEP BELOW the castle. 
> 
> now, the castle goes up 7 floors, so I'd like to think that the dungeons go 7 storeys down too. like I said, it could be MORE, but very likely is not less cause of slytherin being deeper than water level. that's all to say! where gryffindor's common room is on the top aka 7th floor of the castle (fun fact, it likely wasn't always there, as per the books description, but we've confirmation of floor 7 later on in the series) it makes for a nice contrast, you know? opposite ends of hogwarts.
> 
> ANYWAY!
> 
> but yeah, have a little dip into the side of HP that we never got to see, aka the SLYTHERINS. some of the families that are purported blood supremacists and all that jazz. maddy having a connection to the greengrass' is... logical, cause she works at st. mungo's. but it's also a little nod to kim's family connection to that whole side of the wizarding population, too. we will explore this more as the story goes on.
> 
> \---
> 
> THANKS FOR READING FRIENDS! <3 bit short this week so next update will be quicker, I think.


	44. In Bloom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/6WoyghnMAvDDRbZfFbpwEo?si=vLURbA1RSKWxtzVb-bqoSg). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Kim tosses the Floo Powder into the fireplace then steps forward and clearly states her address, tucking her elbows in and squeezing her eyes shut.

After a good amount of spinning, she's stepping out into a familiar living room and a gigantic smile spreads across her face.

Her mum is right there, having already removed her travelling cloak and shoes. She turns to Kim and smiles mischievously, then scurries over, picking her up and peppering her face with kisses.

" _M_ _uuuuu_ _UMMMM_ ," Kim whines, even though there's no place in the world she would rather be.

"I missed you," Maddy mutters, still smiling. "Your Nana and Nani are upstairs, though I'm sure they're still asleep. And I believe the _band of idiots_ are in the basement; go see them, they have been very excited to see you. I'm going to make us something to eat."

Kim beams at her and nods. She removes her cloak and puts it on one of the hooks next to the fireplace, toeing off her shoes, then follows her mother across the living room. Her mum continues through the open doorway into the kitchen and Kim turns left, padding down the light blue carpeted stairs to the basement.

Both of her mum's parents are wizarding naturalists—back in Uganda they owned a modest-sized magical Beast sanctuary. Kim's mum and all of her siblings grew up around a vast array of animals, but Maddy only discovered her passion for Healing magic while in her later years at Uagadou; when she was young, she always figured she would become a Magizoologist and take over her parents' sanctuary one day.

Unfortunately for all of them, Uganda became a hostile country to anyone of Asian descent by the time Kim's mum was in school. After she graduated and left to take the job at St. Mungo's, Maddy's parents and family—as well as the entire Ugandan Asian population—were forced to leave a few years later by the government. They packed up their entire sanctuary (and all of their Beasts) into one magically-enhanced suitcase and all of their worldly possessions into another, then boarded a muggle airplane for the first time in their lives and came to the UK.

Generations earlier, Kim's Nana's parents came to Britain as Gujarati immigrants after living in Uganda for a couple decades. They built a life here and apparently garnered some favour among pure-blood supremacists, for their family name was included in the infamous 'Pure-Blood Directory' that was published in the 1930's.

The thought of it makes Kim's skin crawl.

And Kim's mum has speculated that it might have been their family's Parselmouth ability that made the bigoted pure-blood fanatics respect them so quickly, or at least enough to include them on their stupid list. As Kim's Nana tells the story, though, his parents were so unimpressed with the blood-status bullshit that they simply didn't interact with the UK pure-blood community whatsoever.

Maddy likes to joke that this made their family more 'mysterious', so instead of being deemed blood-traitors like, say, the Weasley family, the Shafiq's became more respected in their isolation.

According to their family's oral history, the Parselmouth ability is passed down to the women only in their bloodline. This means that though Kim's Nana is a carrier of it, hereditarily-speaking, he doesn't display the ability himself—but all of his sisters do. He passed it down to Kim's mum (and all three of her sisters), who passed it down to Kim.

Despite Maddy's theories regarding the pure-blood community and their family's earned respect, their snake-speaking is quite a well-kept family secret. It's more so out of necessity than anything, as Maddy quickly discovered upon arriving in Britain that wizards who could talk to snakes were immediately labelled as 'dark'.

She kept her ability secret from even Kim and her father. To this day, Kim's dad still doesn't know about it.

Needless to say, it came as a heavily unwelcome surprise when Kim attended a dueling club meeting midway through her second year at Hogwarts and found that she could _understand_ what Potter said in Parseltongue to the snake that Malfoy conjured. He was ostracised and feared after the incident, so she kept her revelation firmly to herself.

And a large part of Kim was questioning if she actually heard it at all, given she had already missed some school (and the first Quidditch practice of the year) due to a nasty flu that she caught in the first week back, which came with a fever that caused what she _thought_ were auditory hallucinations. It was jarring to experience, sure, but at the time Kim filed it away as something imagined, attempting to block it from her mind entirely.

But as luck would have it, that technique didn't exactly work out. Because it happened _again_ , well past when any flu-induced explanation could conceivably apply, with the same ominous whispers of _'Kill, kill, kill_ ' seeming to follow her one evening as she made her way down to her common room.

Kim was terrified, and without further ado promptly checked herself into the hospital wing, full-out telling Madam Pomfrey she was hearing voices in the walls.

Thankfully, Madam Pomfrey seemed to take pity on her and didn't press further. She told Kim that she looked exhausted and swept her into a bed, where Kim was given a heated blanket and a sleeping potion that knocked her out for an entire day.

After she was discharged the voices continued, but she felt refreshed and restored afterward, which was nice.

Which is why when the dueling club incident happened months later, Kim didn't trust herself at first, nor did she even think to connect the two occurrences, never considering that she was already hearing an _Eldritch monster of a snake_ as it slithered through the castle—at that point, she had no idea what a Basilisk was. She just figured that she was going a bit mental from the internal _anguish_ brought on by finally beginning to question the blood-status supremacy ideology that her father had so carefully planted in her mind; the rift between her and Amanda was growing by the day, after all, and everything she had painstakingly crafted at Hogwarts was crumbling as a result.

But she was undeniably curious about the Parselmouth thing, having heard the word whispered in the corridors and spat at Potter enough on the day after the dueling club meeting to have a name for it. She took it upon herself to sneak into the Restricted Section of the library that evening, on the last day of term, intent on reading up as much as she could before going home for Winter break.

Still not entirely convinced she hadn't imagined it all, an easy lie to her mother and some careful planning preceded a solo trip to the London Zoo after Christmas, where Kim spent the afternoon having an initially tentative but eventually lengthy conversation with one of the King Cobras that lived there.

It was confirmation; a kind of assurance that she could indeed trust her own mind, at least sometimes.

With all the gossip she was privy to in the following months at school, though, about Parselmouths being dark wizards by default, about the ability denoting something intrinsically evil about a person, she was _so_ afraid that if her mother found out, she too would think Kim was something... wrong. Something bad.

And it isn't like Kim had any further to fall in her mother's eyes back then; the two of them hadn't spoken in a meaningful capacity for over two years by that point. 

All of that was Kim's fault, of course. But to have her mum thinking that there was some kind of... integral evil written inside of her only child? That was something else entirely.

So Kim didn't tell her. And once rumours about a Basilisk living in the Chamber of Secrets started circulating at the end of term, everything _finally_ fucking made sense.

A couple weeks into the summer holiday found Kim venturing into Knockturn Alley by herself, looking to find one of the few pet shops that sold magical snakes. She got Ptero, and for the first time since discovering her ability, she didn't feel alone.

When Kim brought him home it was just like bonding with any other pet… except with talking.

Her and Ptero were chatting a few short days later when he mentioned her mum 'telling' him something. Kim got him to clarify then whipped downstairs, finding her mum in the kitchen cooking and humming to herself.

" _YOU CAN SPEAK IT TOO?!_ " Kim said loudly in Parseltongue, not even angry, just disbelieving. The ability had made her feel incredibly lonely for half a year, and lo and behold, there was her goofball mother, singing in her apron—a Parselmouth all along.

Maddy slowly turned around from stirring her stew to face Kim, then grimaced and threw her hands (one covered in an oven mitt and the other clutched around a stirring spoon) up in the air.

After standing like that for a few seconds, Maddy's face broke into the widest smile. She rushed over to Kim, pulled her into a crushing hug—something Kim was still reveling in, after so long without—and spun her around. Giddily hissed, " _Whoopsie_."

They proceeded to talk almost exclusively in Parseltongue for the rest of the summer. When Kim returned to Hogwarts in the fall for the start of her third year, she had never before felt closer to her mother or more sure of herself as a person.

She'd certainly just fallen out with her father, and there were days where she wanted to give up entirely, but she pressed on. Ptero helped; her mum helped. That was the beginning of her effort to change her behaviour for the better.

Fast-forward to the following spring and things were quite different. The Amanda Incident happened just before the Easter holiday, and Kim's life at school had fallen to pieces.

After picking Kim up and taking her out of school early for the two week break, Maddy insisted on coming to Hogsmeade _every weekend_ during the last three months of term just to make sure Kim was doing okay. She received special permission from Dumbledore to do so, and once Kim promised to keep the visits secret from her peers, he agreed to it without question. He even arranged for her to use the fireplace in Professor Snape's office as a Floo Network link to The Three Broomsticks.

And at the end of that term, Kim's mum sent her a letter with news of something to look forward to: in addition to their pet Kneazles Paws and Jaws, her mum's beautiful old barn owl Agni, and Ptero, Maddy had arranged for them to have two _more_ pets in the house. They were rescues, just as all of their animals (except Ptero) had been.

Through their work as Magizoologists with the Ministry of Magic, Kim's Nani and Nana were often given a variety of magical animals to care for both temporarily and permanently. Their most recent wards at the time were all rescues, confiscated from some black market Beast dealer.

The group included two creatures who were a bonded pair—they refused to be separated, and it would've been inhumane to do so. One was only a little baby and the other a bit older, and they both needed what her mum had deemed 'special attention'. Maddy seemed to think that they would be a good match for her and Kim's tiny menagerie.

Upon coming home from Hogwarts for the summer a few weeks later, Kim found out why: both of the creatures were at least part serpent. Though her Nana and Nani were more than capable of caring for them, Maddy and Kim had the ability to provide a unique kind of rehabilitation for the creatures—just _talking_ to them.

Smiling at the memories, Kim steps into another pair of slip-on trainers and opens the door to the basement, marveling at it for what feels like the thousandth time.

Because it's not just a basement—it's a magically expanded habitat. It's bits and pieces of West Africa and India and the dynamic nature of the UK.

It's based off of her Nani and Nana's old setup in Uganda and is a smaller, much less complex version of their current sanctuary: a sprawling, beautiful landscape located at their house in Cairngorms National Park in Scotland, which practically neighbours Hogwarts.

Kim's come through the basement door (which is pretending to be an opening in a rock face) into a grove full of massive, ancient-looking trees with a waist-deep river bubbling ahead of her.

If she walks to her right and follows the river deeper into the Gujarat-based forest, she'll eventually come to the small lake that divides the two major landscapes within the habitat: the Indian and African sides. Immediately across the river is a jungle, and further, the dense vegetation quickly blends into a savannah area modeled off of the nature in Burkina Faso. There's a sprawling valley just beyond the reed field to her left, filled with native British vegetation that spans the rest of the space.

" _I do miss this when we're at school,_ " Ptero hisses quietly, bopping his nose into the underside of her jaw.

Kim hums and starts to walk towards the river. Reaching out and touching the trunk of the massive central banyan tree with her left hand, she realises that it's... quiet. Too quiet.

Her mum said the animals were down here... perhaps they're by the lake—

" _KIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!_ "

A strong, solid, and very much _alive_ something comes hurtling through the air, knocking her backwards and tackling her to the ground.

She lands sitting up and surprisingly softly for (apparently) now being underneath a pile of multiple animals, with her head and the small of her back cradled as she fell by what she quickly recognises as a serpent's body.

Six pairs of eyes are staring at her.

Kim beams back at them, and they all look _delighted_.

Then, everyone starts talking at once:

" _wElcOME BAcK kiM! Hi Ptero! I learned to hunt more bugs while you were gone, Paws has been teaching me—_ "

" _Kimberly, Pterodactyl, it is so great to see y—_ "

" _I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT TREEHOUSES AND I WAS WONDER_ _ING_ —"

" _Thank you for coming back. Save me from them._ "

William, their sapphire blue Occamy (and the youngest of the group), is the one coiled around her torso still. Given their current position, he seems to be the one who tackled her.

Kim takes a deep breath and replies in Parseltongue, " _Will, baby, I'm so happy you're learning. Paws is the best girl to teach you about hunting bugs._ " She pats his head and he closes his eyes, clearly happy. " _And look how big you are! Is this your actual size, or did you make yourself bigger to wrap around me?_ "

" _I wanted to hug you so I got bigger,_ " William replies, bopping her forehead with his own. " _I am actually THREE feet according to mum! And Athos is teaching me to climb trees too!"_

She smiles. " _As soon as you're full grown we're going out flying together. But trees are great for now._ "

Athos, Porthos, and Aramis—the three heads of their vivid orange and black Runespoor—are grouped around William's head. Silent now, they're all watching him in a fond, parent-like way.

Kim nods at the head on the left. " _Athos, it's great to see you too. Been holding down the fort in my absence, I see. Porth, I LOVE treehouses_." She considers for a moment then gestures between the two of them. " _You two should start planning one together. Athos, why don't you start to work out the conceptual stuff based off of Porth's ideas?"_

They both nod at her enthusiastically.

Scoffing playfully, Kim addresses Aramis on the right, " _Air, come on, you goofball. You don't need saving._ " She jerks her head at Athos and Porthos. " _They're both great and you know that. But I'll work with them on the treehouse plans while I'm home, okay?"_

Aramis inclines his head, pleased.

Paws and Jaws, their two Kneazles, have started wrestling in her lap. She gently pulls them apart, laughing a little as she mutters, "Hi to you too, guys."

With that, Kim lets out a content breath. " _Okay everyone. I have to get up—just came down to let you know I'm here. Haven't said hi to Nana and Nani yet._ "

Paws and Jaws seem to understand; they move off her lap and resume their play fighting a few feet away. William helps her up and she pats Aramis' snout as she turns to walk back to the door. They all follow her, and Ptero tickles the base of her neck with the end of his tail.

" _Everyone's coming? Awesome,_ " Kim says, starting to ascend the stairs back up into the house. As she goes, Nana's voice reaches her ears, singing along to a song playing from the turntable: ['Crazy Little Thing Called Love'](https://open.spotify.com/track/35ItUJlMtjOQW3SSiTCrrw?si=lzFew-lfSGGM86RsPV2bGw) by Queen.

She turns left to enter the kitchen with Ptero around her neck and William draped around her torso, both of whom are hissing softly back and forth in excited conversation. Athos, Porthos, and Aramis make their way to Maddy immediately, who is sat with Nani at the kitchen table, both chatting softly and sipping coffees.

Nana is at the stove cooking with his back to them, wearing Maddy's flowery apron and dancing lightly to the music.

" _Ś_ _iśu!_ " Nani greets warmly, getting up and padding over in her slippers. William shrinks himself down and moves to coil around Kim's forearm, and Nani hugs her tightly.

"Hi Nani," Kim mutters. She melts into the embrace despite her Nani being much shorter than her; Kim's chin is just above the top of her head. Looking to the right, she scoffs. "Nana! Is breakfast more important than me?"

He turns around and holds his huge arms aloft for a hug, smiling. "Come to me, _ś_ _i_ _ś_ _u_. We both know that you care more about the welfare of these sausages than you do about pleasantries."

Kim gently detaches herself from Nani (who deftly takes William off her arm and walks to the table, cooing down at him) and strides over to Nana.

She hugs him, grinning into his chest. "It's nice to see you guys," she murmurs, and he kisses the top of her head in response.

They break apart and he returns his attention to the stovetop. Kim walks over to the table, where Athos, Porthos, and Aramis are curled up in a ball at Maddy's feet. William is perched on a chair and has made to take a nap as well.

Kim plops into a seat and Ptero slithers down onto the table, where he comes to a stop right in front of Nani. Though she can't speak Parseltongue, she strokes his head gently and tickles his underbelly with her fingernail.

"You're home for a week, right honey?" Nani asks, smiling. "I think your Nana and I are going to stay until you go. We will drop you off in Hogsmeade on our way back home."

Kim beams. "That'd be brilliant."

Maddy hums, looking between them fondly. "I took the week off as well, _beta_. It will be nice to spend some time all together."

.

A few days later Kim's standing over the kitchen table with a protractor in one hand and a pencil behind her ear, leaning heavily on the heels of her palms and staring down at the multitude of large rolls of paper spread out in front of her.

She rocks back on her feet and rubs at the base of her neck. After sketching out the plans and schematics for the basement treehouse all morning with help from Athos, Porthos, and Aramis, she could really use a nap. Yawning wildly and tapping her wood ruler to her forehead softly, she glances at the clock on the wall.

Admittedly, some help with this would be nice.

Making up her mind, she packs up her materials and leaves the kitchen. Turning right to climb the stairs up to the second floor of the house, she pads along the plush blue carpet hallway to her mum's study, where she finds their beautiful barn owl Agni sat on her perch, fast asleep.

Using her mum's writing supplies, Kim scratches out a quick letter to Billy, asking him if he'd be at all interested in helping her out with planning the treehouse. She writes his name on the letter envelope carefully, followed by her return address, and seals the note inside.

Quietly, she approaches the still-asleep Agni, then makes a soft little clicking noise with her tongue as she runs a hand gently over her feathers, tracing the colour patterns that look so much like flames—her namesake—then scratches the soft bright white feathers at the peak of her chest.

Agni _hoots_ quietly in acknowledgement and blinks her large eyes open slowly, doing a little hop when she sees Kim. She's been very enthused to have her home, and the visible excitement makes Kim feel like the most special person in the world.

"Hi baby girl," Kim says softly. "I need you to take a letter to a friend of mine—his name is Billy Cranston and his mum is Candace Cranston. I don't know their actual address."

Agni chitters happily, now looking a bit more awake, and nibbles at Kim's finger affectionately once the letter is secured to the leather thong on her leg.

The front door opens and her mum and grandparents' voices carry up the stairs lowly. Agni hops from her perch to the open windowsill and waddles out onto the small platform fixed just outside it, looking back at Kim with another small _hoot_ in goodbye before she takes off into the chilly December afternoon.

With a soft smile Kim watches her go before leaving the study and making her way back downstairs. She jerks her head at her family in the doorway. "Hi!"

"Hi honey," Maddy greets, walking from the mud room into the living room with a brown paper shopping bag in her hands. Kim follows her as she enters the kitchen, where she deposits the bag on the worktop and sighs contentedly. Nani follows a moment later, and Kim hears Nana climbing the stairs up to their room.

Kim begins unpacking the groceries, flitting about the kitchen. "Want me to start on lunch?"

Maddy shakes her head, looking over to Nani. "We picked something up. Paid a visit to Alphaeus."

Kim's heart pangs a little, a bittersweet nostalgia sweeping through her at the name. And Maddy must see it on her face, because she comes over and pulls Kim into her arms. "In time, Kim. There's no rush."

Sighing heavily, Kim nods into her mum's shoulder. They break apart and Kim takes the large brown paper bag and tray of four malts from Nani's hands, placing them on the kitchen worktop and beginning to unpack.

An hour later they're all sat at the kitchen table, having finished their takeaway diner food. Kim licks chip salt off her fingers happily, washing it down with the last gulp of her strawberry malt and getting up to help her mum clear the table. Nani is reading a copy of the _Daily Prophet_ , her narrow glasses perched on her nose, and Nana's at the head of the table occupied with his book, _The Color Purple_.

['Just the Way You Are'](https://open.spotify.com/track/49MHCPzvMLXhRjDantBMVH?si=K4KPnvxnR2WqF01o0ZyhfA) by Billy Joel is playing softly from the turntable in the living room, and Kim hums along as she crushes the paper bag and empty malt cups into their rubbish bin.

She looks up to see her mum watching her from across the kitchen with something unreadable on her face, and Kim tilts her head. "What's up?"

Maddy's eyes soften, gesturing wordlessly towards the stairs. Frowning, Kim follows her upstairs into her study, walking in as her mum pauses at the door.

Reaching the desk, Kim runs her fingers over the soft flowy material of the tiny rainbow pride flag that sticks out of her mum's pen holder. It had appeared there shortly after Kim came out to her last year.

A small smile tugs at her lips.

Maddy shuts the door with a soft _click_ , hands lingering on the glossy wood before she turns and leans against it. "Are we going to talk about that letter before you go back?"

Kim faces her mum, crossing her arms. "Did you read it?"

"Yes."

"And?"

There's a pause as Maddy searches her eyes. "Do you want me to show it to you?"

"No."

Maddy hums, eyes still gentle. "It wasn't about his Mark."

Kim's brow furrows. "Then what?"

"It was short — small talk, really. He said he didn't want to be presumptuous. But he asked about you, how school was, how Tommy and Jason were..."

Kim lets out a dark, bitter laugh. "Oh? Wondering how they are after he told me to dump them in the gutter?" She shakes her head as sharp anger blooms in her chest all at once. "Curious how chipper I am after I lost my fucking father?"

Maddy sighs. "Kim..."

"He's got a lot of nerve," Kim mutters, arms closing tighter around herself.

There's a pause as Maddy considers, still on the other side of the room. "He's trying, _beta_." Kim makes an affronted noise and Maddy holds up her hand. "Which does _not_ mean you have to respond, or feel any obligation to. I am at your back here. Do not forget."

Kim lets out a breath, running her hand through her hair and tugging at it a bit. "Sorry. Don't mean to snap."

Maddy waves her off. "No need to apologise." She pauses, frowning. "I just don't want you to keep it bottled up. That doesn't work — you know this."

"Yeah."

"So how are you feeling about it?"

"I thought that was obvious."

Maddy just watches in silence, giving her an imploring look.

Kim sighs again. "I— angry, I guess? Sad?" Her jaw flexes. "But that was all he said? Just small talk?"

And as always, her mum seems to hear the question she's actually asking, shoehorned between her words. "Yes. He did not apologise."

"What am I supposed to do with that? For all I know, he still thinks he's in the right."

Maddy purses her lips. "I can't say for certain, but the lack of apology is an indication that's the case. Though from our correspondence over the last few months, it's evident that he's very... worried about all of this business with his Mark." She pauses, letting out a breath. "I suspect he doesn't know how to feel."

"Is he going to keep writing me?"

"I'm... not sure," Maddy says slowly. "Would you like me to tell him not to?"

"He probably wouldn't listen to you anyway," Kim mutters, shifting her feet.

Maddy's eyes harden. "You're likely right, but there are ways. I will not let him harass you—"

"That's not what this is, mum," Kim interjects, voice wavering a little. Staring at the floor.

Her mum crosses the room then, steps slow and soft, and comes to stand right in front of her. "If you do not want him to write you, I will make sure he doesn't," she says, putting a hand on Kim's face. "It's no trouble for me to have that arranged."

Wiping at an escaping tear, Kim looks up into her eyes. "I—" she stops, voice thick and catching in her throat. "Part of me _wants_ him to. I just don't think I can read any of them."

Maddy nods, opening her arms and pulling Kim into her. "If he continues, you can send them on to me. Or keep them, your choice," she says, resting her cheek against Kim's temple. "But the _second_ you don't want him to anymore, you must promise you will tell me."

Kim hums. "Okay."

They stand like that in each other's arms, both breathing deep. The various magical devices on her mum's heavy wood desk _click_ and _whirr_ quietly, blending into the soft notes of the song they can hear playing from downstairs, muffled. Kim can't quite make it out from here; it's a happy tune, though, if a bit far away.

"I _miss_ him," Kim whispers, feeling much younger all at once. "I just want him to get himself together — overcome this. Come back to us."

"I do too," Maddy replies, voice equally soft. "But he is an adult and you are his child… it's not your responsibility to deal with him before he's got himself sorted."

Kim steps back, holding her hand. "It's not yours either."

There's a pause as Maddy looks down at her thoughtfully, a sad smile pulling at her lips. Pride shining in her teary eyes. "You have wisdom in that head of yours."

Kim's mouth pulls into a matching smile. "Surprised?"

"Not in the slightest," Maddy murmurs, kissing her on the forehead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'in bloom' by neck deep.
> 
> nana's reading 'the color purple' by alice walker.
> 
> \---
> 
> HEY! welcome to kim's house, and meet her grandparents! 
> 
> majority of this one is family history exposition, rooted in real-world happenings. when crafting kim's family tree/bloodline, I had to do some BANANAS research into the indian diaspora etc. that bit about the expulsion of kim's family from uganda is real [history](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Expulsion_of_Asians_from_Uganda), where the president gave the _entire_ south asian population of the country (most of which were Gujarati Indians) 90 days notice to leave. it was a huge, horrific mess, and that article is a good jumping-off point if you're curious to read further about it. 
> 
> but yes, again, maddy grew up in uganda and did NOT attend hogwarts — she went to [uagadou](https://www.wizardingworld.com/writing-by-jk-rowling/uagadou), which is one of the other major wizarding schools in HP canon that JKR established on pottermore. she only moved to the UK to take the job at st. mungo's.
> 
> reference there to other HP book canon too, where harry goes to a dueling club meeting in book 2. kim was there, of course, and HOO BOY what an UNPLEASANT SURPRISE the parselmouth stuff was for her. that little note about her missing her first quidditch practice of the year, too, is a write-around for her not being present when harry and co encountered the slytherin team with their new Nimbus 2001 brooms bought for the team by lucius malfoy.
> 
> BUT YEAH THIS SHIT IS INTRICATE OKAY! YOU SHOULD SEE ALL MY NOTES!
> 
> and this is also a nod to like... the fact that kim, as someone who LIVES IN THE DUNGEONS, would have H E A R D the basilisk as it slithered through the walls. this'll be revisted next schoolyear!
> 
> and from my understanding/research, it wasn't exactly ANNOUNCED that there was a basilisk in the castle that year, but from the rumours that we hear about in book 5 about harry killing a basilisk with the sword in dumbledores office, it stands to reason that word got around.
> 
> but yeah. I know that exposition with kim and how she figured out all the parselmouth stuff was a bit long, but it's gotta happen sometimes! 
> 
> NOW! you get to see kim's basement! it's one of my favourite things about this story and I AM SO PLEASED to show it to you. you will see more next chapter!
> 
> meet the pets! kim told trini in a past chapter that she had two kneazles, among 'other' pets. so there ya go! the names are mostly referential, with william being a nod to william of occam, the dude who came up with 'occam's razor'. athos, porthos, and aramis you'll recognise from the three musketeers. paws and jaws are just... called that because that's how they are and they're adorable. I go with the 'fantastic beasts and where to find them' film visual for an occamy, and there's a glimpse of a MASSIVE runespoor in a deleted scene. but if you're curious, they look like [this](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/8a/e8/14/8ae814cb712354f55879ee4506ec43a8.gif) and [this](https://images.ctfassets.net/usf1vwtuqyxm/65wzVEOuwoYcAKg4OUIW2C/4ea9186f82b05623190b546d19da19c7/Runespoor-1.jpg?w=914) respectively, according to pottermore/canon depictions. william is still young, but he isn't as small as that little dude in the gif. occamies are also what JKR has dubbed 'choranaptyxic' which means they can grow or shrink to fit available space. so that's what william did, to catch kim. william and athos/porthos/aramis are the 'bonded pair' kim referred to.
> 
> 'sisu' is a bit of sanskrit, meaning 'young' or 'little one' in this context. it's a family term of endearment that kim's grandparents call her, and you'll see an explanation about that (and the full word) two in-universe years down the line, when nana gives our resident Tiny Angry Gay a little family history lesson when she's over at kim's for christmas.
> 
> on that note: 'agni' (maddy's owl's name) is sanskrit for 'fire'. 
> 
> this house isn't the one kim originally lived in growing up — she no longer lives down the street from jason and tommy, cause her mum moved after everything with her dad. this one is in the outer london area and not right in the suburbs. there's a bit more space around it.
> 
> 1st mention of alphaeus quinnuayuak, tommy's maternal uncle. he owns and runs 'alphas' which is a diner. little alpha-5 nod there. we learn more about him down the line.
> 
> the letter maddy and kim are discussing is from ch24! note, there's a very purposeful line being drawn here between kim's dad's... pull towards darkness & the concept of addiction, fyi. more on that later.
> 
> \---
> 
> thanks for reading guys. we'll get back to interactions with all the kids in a couple chapters. again, hopefully quicker updates so you don't get impatient with me :)


	45. Guiding Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/63J2iqaDDp92P1eZgvuELp?si=yueqNjuBQ4OpIXuNI5aoBQ). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Late afternoon on New Year's Day finds Kim laying on the plush carpet in the living room, dozing next to the coffee table as the wireless in the corner plays a rerun of a British and Irish Quidditch League match from a few weeks ago. The fireplace is crackling merrily to her left, the warmth kissing her cheek, and Nani is sat nearby on the pink suede sofa knitting while Nana naps upstairs.

Her mum is in the kitchen humming to herself, preparing Kim's favourite chicken stew. The whole house smells amazing.

There's a knock on the door, and Kim's eyes fly open. A smile pulls at her mouth as she gets to her feet slowly, stretching. Maddy pops out of the kitchen and leans against the doorframe, smiling.

Kim passes the fireplace and turns left into the mud room, opening their large front door with Paws and Jaws twining around her legs.

Billy stands on her doorstep in a winter travelling cloak, holding a bottle of red wine with a red bow wrapped around it. Next to him is a tall, _gorgeous_ woman with black hair that falls in tight curls around her shoulders, dressed in smart maroon wizarding robes with a grey scarf wrapped around her neck. She's holding a small bouquet of flowers that have a green silk ribbon wrapped around the stems.

"Hey Billy, Happy New Year," Kim greets, smiling wide at both of them. "And you must be Mrs. Cranston. Pleasure to meet you." She moves aside and gestures to the house. "Come in — it's cold."

Billy steps over the threshold and stops in front of Kim expectantly, holding his arms open for a hug with a smile on his face that lights up his eyes. Surprised, she pushes into him and wraps her arms around his neck. And this is only the second time they've hugged, ever; he really _is_ excellent at it—holding her tight around the waist and lifting her a little in the air playfully.

Kim laughs lightly, involuntarily, feeling surrounded and content as they pull apart. She steps back to see Billy's mum watching them with a curious look on her face, an incredible warmth stirring in her eyes, no doubt from seeing him so comfortable.

"It's very nice to meet you, Kim," Mrs. Cranston says, unwrapping her scarf. "You can go ahead and call me Candace. I've heard a great deal about you, of course."

"All good things, I hope," comes Maddy's voice, as she steps into the mud room. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Candace. I'm Maddy."

"Nice to see you again, Healer," Billy says to Maddy, looking up at her as he bends to take his boots off.

Maddy smiles. "Good to see you too Billy, and under better circumstances this time," she returns kindly, referencing the trouble at the Quidditch World Cup over the summer. "Let me take those," she adds, gesturing to their cloaks.

Kim shakes her head. "I've got it, mum." She takes their cloaks and hangs them up on the hooks along the wall, with Billy following her into the house. Maddy and Candace linger in the mud room for a few moments, greeting each other with a long hug and beginning to talk in low voices. Candace takes Maddy's hand and squeezes it, eyes warm.

And though they've never met in person, Kim knows the reason for the warm greeting: it had been Jason's parents and Kim's mum who took Kim, Jason, his little sister Pearl, Tommy, and Billy to the Quidditch World Cup over the summer. They all stayed in the same tent, and when the riots broke out after the match Jason's mum Beverly was out and about, still on duty as an Obliviator with the Ministry well into the night.

Their campsite happened to be right in the middle of it, and Kim witnessed her mum and Jason's dad Sam harden in front of her eyes in an instant; a stark reminder that both of them had been through the First Wizarding War. The pair of them got all of the kids to safety, using Side-Along Apparition to transport them a mile or so away to a different, deserted part of Dartmoor.

And after some heated argument—from Kim and Jason especially—Maddy and Sam left to find Jason's mum among the chaos, with Kim and the others remaining in the stifling silence, instructed not to leave the safety of the tent, enchanted to be nigh invisible from the outside.

Some time later they came back with Jason's mum, all three of them covered in grime and streaks of blood.

Given Candace was already familiar with Jason's parents, it had been them who brought Billy back home in the early hours of that morning and explained what happened. Maddy and Kim took Tommy back to theirs, with her dad Elijah arriving a few hours later once he finished work and got the letter Maddy had left for him.

And a large bouquet of flowers had arrived the following day for Maddy, along with a heartfelt letter from Candace, thanking her repeatedly for keeping Billy safe.

Reliving it all where she stands, Kim watches the two of them walk into the house now, still chatting.

" _Kim, sweetheart, are you alright?_ " Nani asks quietly in Gujarati, rousing her out of her memories.

Blinking a couple times, Kim turns around and smiles softly at her. "Yeah, sorry — Nani, this is Billy. B, this is my grandmother."

Standing beside Kim, Billy gives Nani a subdued wave, a kind smile on his lips. "It's a pleasure, ma'am."

Nani chuckles and gets up from the sofa. "The pleasure is mine. You are a polite young man."

They spend the next few minutes making more introductions, with Nana soon coming down and greeting Billy and Candace with his regular chortling enthusiasm. Wine is passed around, with a Coca-Cola apiece for Kim and Billy, and the six of them sit at the kitchen table for supper, chatting happily and tucking in to chicken stew and _chapatis_.

"This is delicious, Maddy," Candace says, and Billy nods happily from beside her. Kim agrees; for all her efforts, she's trying very hard to look polite while doing all but inhaling her entire plate.

Maddy inclines her head. "Thank you. It is my mum's recipe through-and-through."

Nani smiles proudly. "A recipe that my mother taught _me_ ," she says, throwing a goofy look at Kim. "Now, if we could get Kim here to stick around in the kitchen for longer than it takes to set a pan aflame, then we'd _really_ be accomplishing something!"

Kim groans, tipping her head back. "That was _one_ time!" she whines, shaking her head and smiling good-naturedly. "My talents don't extend to culinary endeavours, Nani. You know this."

"Cooking isn't for everyone," Nana says kindly, covering Kim's hand with his and squeezing.

Maddy laughs, though. "We're working on it, slowly but surely."

"Well," Candace says, smiling at Kim, "your talents extend to most everything else, according to my son. I suppose one shortcoming can be allowed."

Kim blinks rapidly in surprise, feeling the warmth of a faint blush creeping up her neck. "Er— what?" she splutters, looking questioningly at Billy. He just shrugs back.

"It's rare that Billy's so impressed with other people his age," Candace explains, a playful twinkle in her eye. "I have it on good authority that you're a great student. And you excel on the Quidditch pitch."

"Among other things," Billy chimes, smiling at Kim.

Kim takes another _chapati_ from the large plate in the centre of the table and busies herself, tearing it apart with her fingers. "Er, well, that's kind of you to say, B. None of us can touch you in most school stuff, though."

"That's untrue," Billy counters, shaking his head lightly. "You're besting me in Transfiguration and Trini is top of the year in Charms."

And at the mention of Trini's name, Maddy, Nani, and Nana all noticeably perk up.

_Oh no._

"I wasn't aware Trini was such a standout in Charms," Maddy says, smiling innocently as Kim throws her a _look_. "I met her last month in Hogsmeade — she's very sweet."

Billy nods enthusiastically. "She is! Jason and I reckon we've never seen anyone who can go toe-to-toe with Kim on the Quidditch pitch like she does, and she's incredibly bright. Very funny and kind, too."

"Oh _really_...?" Nana says, putting a hand on his face and resting his elbow on the edge of the table. "That would explain why Kim seems so enthralled with her, then."

Kim clears her throat. "'Enthralled' is a… strong word, Nana—"

"Would saying you fancy her be more apt?" Maddy chirps, and Kim lets out an exasperated noise.

"Why're you doing this to me. _Why_ ," Kim groans, forgetting her manners entirely and covering her face with her hands.

Billy gently touches her socked foot with his under the table, and Kim peers through her fingers to meet his eyes. "Trini is one of the most amazing people I've ever met," he says then, addressing Kim's family. "But I don't want to make Kim uncomfortable with our line of discussion. We can switch the subject."

Touched, Kim drops her hands, a soft smile appearing on her face. "B, thank you. But don't worry — they've assured me many times that this is how they show love. It's all quite odd, really."

Her family is mirroring her expression, watching Billy fondly at his willingness to step in and defend her.

"Billy, you are a very kind person," Nani says quietly, regarding him with soft eyes. "I couldn't be happier that you and Kim have become friends."

"And in our _defense_ ," Maddy adds, raising a finger in the air in a silly sort of way, "I've never seen Kim look at someone like she was looking at Trini that day in Hogsmeade. I went and wrote home about it, did I not?" She glances at Nani and Nana, who both nod, eyes twinkling. "It's hard not to be curious about what she's like."

"Gossip," Kim huffs, though she's smiling. "Glad to know the details of my personal life are a family affair."

Billy returns her smile, reaching across the table to squeeze her hand once. "Trini's certainly someone to write home about, to be sure." He jerks his head at Candace. "Literally, in my case as well."

Candace nods, smiling at him before she explains, "Trini was the first friend Billy made at Hogwarts, back in first year. I still have that letter — it was pages long." She pauses, eyes shining. "They didn't become properly close until this year, but she's been very special to Billy. More than she knows."

Maddy's eyes soften. "I was not aware that you'd known her that long."

Billy nods. "Permit me to share: this sounds a bit strange to say, but she was the one who made me feel safe at school. Not that I felt like I was in physical danger… it's more that I wasn't sure if I would make any friends." His jaw twitches and he looks up at Kim. "And now I have them! I hope me talking to my mum about you all as much as I do isn't too big of a bother, Kim. I'm just happy to have you all in my life."

Kim blinks to clear her blurring eyes, smiling softly. "Can I hug you?"

Billy nods, removing his napkin from his lap and putting it next to his plate before walking around the table to hug her.

"I'm happy to have you in my life, too," Kim breathes, low enough for only him to hear.

He hums happily into her hair.

They separate to see their families watching them with soft eyes, and Maddy raises her glass for a toast.

.

As planned, Billy returns to Kim's house the next morning alone, popping through the fireplace with a _whoosh_.

At the sound Kim downs the last of her tea and swings into the living room, jerking her head in his direction. "Hey. Keep your shoes on and follow me."

"Shall I leave my bags here?" he asks, gesturing to the two rucksacks he's carrying. Both full to the brim with books and planning supplies, Kim knows.

"Bring your writing stuff and a measuring tape, maybe? Just gonna take a walk around the space so we can get an idea of where to put it. Be back here shortly."

"Cool."

The two of them descend the carpeted stairs to the basement, coming out into the grove just outside the door. Billy nods to himself slowly, eyes darting around as they widen at the sight and fidgeting with the binocular strap hanging around his neck. " _Fascinating_."

"You like it?"

"This is... _brilliant_ , Kim."

Kim gestures to him and he begins to follow her into the forest, walking alongside the river towards the lake. "Location-wise, I'm still thinking it'd be best to put it near the water," she starts, waving her hand around. "I mean, we might as well make it scenic, right?"

Billy continues to peer about. "I agree with you there," he says, gesturing at the gently running water to their left. "Though the river is quite pleasant, as well."

Kim nods. "Could put it where the stream nearly meets the shore, maybe? Haven't surveyed that part yet, but there's a waterfall with a pool. Might be nice."

Billy hums thoughtfully, and they continue to chat as they walk along, soon coming to the lake. It's half a mile across and a quarter wide, surrounded by thick forest on all sides.

Putting his hand up over his eyes like a visor to shield from the sun, Billy stops for a moment, looking around as he mutters, "What a thing, magic." Kim smiles, watching him take it all in. "So we have forested area wrapping around the whole lake, yes?"

He pulls the binoculars hanging around his neck up, peering through them to see across the water in more detail.

"Yeah," Kim answers. "The forest blends into jungle but there's not a stark divide 'til you get to the savannah part at the back. Though we won't be going that far."

They start walking along the shore to the left, passing a tiny sand beach and the small shed that sits close by.

"Okay — so we're looking for a few things, in terms of an ideal spot for treehouse construction," Billy starts, pulling his notebook out of his back pocket as they walk and beginning to read from a prepared list. "One: tall trees with a large trunk circumference, which you seem to have in abundance. Two: relatively even spaces between said trees, if we can find such a thing. Three: flat ground in the vicinity to work, though this is not imperative." He stops, beginning to write another note. "And four: a natural view of the lake, given we aren't looking to clear any trees, yes?"

"Correct," Kim says, sighing a little as she looks around. "I really don't want to hurt any of these trees, if we can manage it. From what I've read, the ideal treehouse build doesn't actually pierce the trunks, either. It's based on using them to stabilise the supports, if you get my meaning."

"I do," Billy replies, running a hand back and forth over his hair a couple times. "Which is why older trees are a good idea — there'll be less growth in their circumference in the future." He pauses, considering. "Mind, magic makes this so much easier. We'll just have the supports move with the trees."

Kim nods. "I'm so excited about that part."

"Still going to be a lot of work though, Kim," he mutters. "If you're up for it, so am I. But we... might want to consider enlisting the others to help when we start over the summer."

"That was my intention," Kim says, carefully stepping over a protruding root. "My mum'll need permission from everyone's parents about the whole using magic down here thing, but I don't see why they wouldn't help out? All three of them love projects in some sense: Zack crafts in his spare time, Jase likes building things, and Trini can take something apart, learn about how it works, and put it back together almost as well as you can."

"Just as well, I suspect," Billy says, smiling. "She's certainly been doing it as long as I have, what with all the tinkering she does."

"It'll be a fun thing for the five of us to do together—" she pauses, brow furrowing. "Maybe we'll get Tom in on it too? She'd love to go to town with an axe."

Billy hums his agreement and they continue walking, soon reaching one of the potential build areas Kim had scoped out before: it's a clearing just past a small point, so the treehouse won't be visible from the beach. 

She paces back and forth, the moist earth compacting under her trainers, tipping her head back to look between the trees to their left. A handful of colourful birds are perched nearby, singing gently in the warm breeze.

Billy turns slowly on the spot, surveying the area as well. "Another question to consider — how near to the basement door do you want to be? Should it be closer?"

"I mean..." Kim starts, considering. "End-to-end, you can walk this place in twenty-five minutes? A half hour if you're dawdling. If we keep the treehouse on this side of the lake, closest to the door, the most of a walk it'd be is fifteen minutes if we take a direct route through. I reckon that's reasonable?"

Billy nods. "And do we want it visible from the beach?"

Kim turns to look out at the lake and squints. "Visible from the cliff 'round the other side, maybe. A bit tucked away."

"More of a clubhouse feel."

"Exactly."

Billy hums, continuing to peer around. "Do you want it to be right on the lake?" He pauses, bringing his hand up to shield his eyes again. "The issue in this current spot that I foresee is heat. It's a normal day and night down here, right? So you're going to have the sun."

"Ah," Kim mutters. "Shade might be nice, you're right."

"So a bit back from the shore but a good view of the water."

That seems sound, and Kim hums. "Putting it right on the stream might be the best idea, then. Maybe where we were talking about earlier? The waterfall? It's wide enough that it creates a natural gap in the trees."

Billy gestures. "Lead the way! Let's see."

After a bit of a trek uphill they arrive at the place where the stream meets the shore, finding the waterfall there with a wide pool below, bubbling away.

"This is picturesque," Billy says, raising his voice a little to be heard over the rushing water and looking out. He exhales contentedly. "What a view."

Kim, meanwhile, is peering around the area. The stream is on a plateaued spot at the top of a hill. It's one of the highest points in the whole habitat, and she's jumped from the waterfall into the pool before, though her diving cliff on the other side is her preferred spot.

This would be a cool place for the treehouse.

"What do you think?" Kim asks, craning her head back again to look at the trees. They're spaced wider on the far side of the stream, so she walks a bit upstream from the waterfall and removes her shoes, rolling her joggers up to mid-thigh to wade across and take a look.

Billy copies her, smiling as the cool water tickles his legs, and plops down on a rock next to the stream on the other side, looking around. "This might actually work!"

"Even with magic, it's gonna take us a while," Kim says slowly. "None of us knows how to craft with magic in terms of the finer, more precise stuff, right? We'll have to do that by hand."

"We can learn. I believe in us."

They begin sizing up the trees nearest to the waterfall, at it for ten minutes before Athos, Porthos, and Aramis come slithering along. And Kim had given Billy ample warning about their pets, but his eyes still widen at the sight. He gets to his feet too, understandably.

" _Hey guys, this is Billy_ ," Kim says in Parseltongue. " _He's the one helping with the treehouse planning._ "

"What do they think of the location?" Billy asks curiously, holding out a hand to them but not making to move closer. After a small pause it's Porthos that leans forward first, and the three of them soon close the space, each bopping their snout into his palm in turn.

A brief discussion follows, and Kim and Billy soon have their approval for the spot. She smiles, sitting down on a rock and taking her own leather-bound notebook out of her back pocket.

"I'll start planning out some schematics for work tables first, I think?" Kim says, tapping her fountain pen on her thigh. "Outlined some general stuff a few days ago — I'll show you once we're back in the house. But for the tables, there's a ton of bamboo a five minute walk from here or so. We can use that."

He nods slowly. "Bamboo is excellent. Constructing the roof and walls that way would make sense, too, then we can use regular wood for the supports and base?"

"Sounds good."

Billy strides towards a group of massive trees, tilting his head back to look at the canopy. "These might be the ticket." He gestures between them, walking the space thoughtfully. "We can run the supports up from the ground and anchor them with enchanted ropes, and the platform—" he waves his hand in the empty space, "can stretch between."

Kim watches, humming under her breath and trying to visualise it. "How er... hard do you want to go with this, in terms of complexity? I figure we won't need running water, per se, because... magic."

"Sure," Billy says, using the trunk of one of the trees as a upright writing desk and jotting notes quickly. "I reckon a small kitchen would be ideal, so we can install mechanical pumps with empty water tanks. Same thing with bathroom facilities and a shower, but we won't need a physical water source, which is nice."

Kim makes a note. "I'll start to look into basic plumbing systems—"

Billy waves his hand around. "No need. Trini and I've had many discussions about plumbing as a topic. She and I are very interested in it, so we can do the research."

"Interested in plumbing...?" Kim says, eyes twinkling. "That's a new one."

"Not so new," Billy replies, missing her teasing tone. "Trini's had an interest since she learned about the plumbing system in the castle. It's all quite fascinating."

Kim smiles softly. "Cool, B. Then I suppose I'll start on rough plans for the structure, once we figure out the base schematics." She gets up and walks over to him, taking a measuring tape out of her pocket. "Wanna get some numbers down?"

Billy nods, beginning to fiddle with his binoculars. After twisting a couple of knobs and pressing a small button, a compartment opens up in the underside of them, from which he removes a measuring tape similar to Kim's. Smiles back at her. "Let's do it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'guiding light' by mumford & sons.
> 
> \---
> 
> hello! last chapter before we go back to hogwarts! 
> 
> meet billy's mum! she's lovely, and I'm always a sucker for parents meeting proper. bit of background on billy and kim at the world cup there, too. billy had mentioned that he stayed in jason's tent when catching up with trini post-summer, back in chapter... four? I think? and maddy went along to both help corral all the kids and to be there with kim, given kim's panic attacks had been real bad all through the summer. she initially didn't want kim to go, but eventually agreed. stipulation was that she had to be there too. (cause remember, the amanda incident happened just a few months prior.)
> 
> in lighter news, the kids are planning to build a treehouse! I'll show you what it looks like in rough images once we get to constructing it in the summer. but building something together is such a lovely way to spend time, yaknow?
> 
> RE the kids being able to use magic outside of school in order to make building easier — kim asked her mum about it and maddy agreed, and this is a bit of an expansion on what we're told in book 6 specifically by dumbledore: wizarding households are largely left to themselves when it comes to the Trace that all underage magical kids (ie before they come of age and turn 17) in the UK have on them. 
> 
> cause the ministry keeps tabs on underage magic, but in terms of how it works, I've gathered that it's like a blip comes up whenever someone uses magic around a kid who has the Trace on them. so whenever kim is at home on holidays, her Trace will constantly be pinging the ministry system under HER NAME, even though she herself isn't using magic, because MADDY is casting in her vicinity. 
> 
> so in terms of how the enchantment works, it's canonically impossible to tell WHO cast. it's like each kid is a little localised radar. so kim could technically be using magic in her mum's house a whole lot, even underage, but she'd never get in trouble for it officially. the ministry relies on parents to enforce the rules when they're in private households.
> 
> normally, maddy prefers that kim doesn't use magic outside of school, but there'll be times where she allows it! that isn't the same for every wizarding family — ie the weasleys in the HP books, where molly does NOT let any of the kids use magic outside of school. and... with fred and george for sons, it makes sense?
> 
> but yes. every family is different. 
> 
> a little note... I had to do like, some serious in-book research into the Trace when trying to figure out how it worked exactly. because there's a bit of... muddled info? in the books? we get the main explanation where it relates to voldemort (when he was still a student at hogwarts) killing his father and retrieving the resurrection stone from morfin and co's cabin without getting caught. & it makes sense that the ministry wouldn't know just WHO cast those spells, but by what I've gathered, they certainly must've questioned young voldy about it. asked him why he was there and all that jazz because it would've been HIS Trace that pinged. but like dumbledore told harry, voldy was Head Boy and a great student. I can imagine there was a lot of Privilege Goggles that factored in there.
> 
> I also looked into book 5, where real!moody and the gang come and grab harry from privet drive. interestingly, the Trace isn't mentioned as the reason why they take harry to grimmauld place on brooms, but I think I've come to understand their reasoning! my guess is they didn't want the ministry tracking them TO grimmauld place via the floo network or portkey, which JKR mentions in-text. cause that'd suggest that grimmauld place was their final destination (it's also unplottable AND under the fidelius charm, so they'd just disappear from the radar, which is suspicious)!
> 
> plus! the ministry was sending word about harry's hearing time changing to ARTHUR, so they obviously knew he wasn't at home. but moody does magic when they ARRIVE at the street outside grimmauld place, so harry's Trace would've pinged on the ministry system at that location. my guess is that like... for all the ministry knew, harry could've just been walking through london on the way to somewhere else and passed someone doing magic. and in a city of that size, there's bound to be wizards all over the place, and in close proximity? anyway.
> 
> continuing along — have a bit of already-mentioned backstory on billy and trini's relationship. she is and was very important to him! again, more than she knows. and HAVE SOME TEASING by kim's family RE trini. maddy certainly HAS EYES, and her comments when it comes to trini are entirely warranted! everyone (but trini, apparently) can see kim's Hart Eyes from a mile away! kim is not subtle!
> 
> \---
> 
> again, brief chapter this time. next one'll pick up a few days into the spring term. thanks as always for reading, folks <3


	46. Now or Never Now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/4Eh6mc993AIHTEpj3LFIlp?si=K23ZpezjRS6pPeft7DZTFQ). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Three days into second term and they're all sat at their regular table in the library, with Kim precariously tipped back on her chair, lazily practising Switching Spells.

And she doesn't need the practise whatsoever, but she's been finding it entertaining going back and forth for the past twenty minutes, continuously swapping the dried flowers on the reading room's fireplace mantle for a pile of spare quills she's amassed from Jason, Trini, and Zack.

She _may_ have used a Summoning Charm to get the quills without telling them; even a couple months after learning the _Accio_ spell, the five of them have all taken to... inconveniencing each other with it on a regular basis.

Recently that consisted of Zack using the charm to cause Trini's beanie to fly off her head as she walked into the Great Hall for breakfast. And Trini, who already learned the spell back in September, promptly responded by Summoning it back before he could even catch it, also using the charm to take his entire plate of food a few minutes later (just as he was about to start eating) for good measure.

Kim smiles to herself and gently tips her chair back onto four legs, tuning back into the conversation. Jason's warm voice is sounding from beside her, "...so interesting to see everyone interacting, you know? Billy and I were saying how it's so cool that this Tournament exists—it's great to get a different take on magic from people who live outside of Britain."

Zack looks up from his Potions essay to nod at Jason thoughtfully.

Kim nods too and hums, interested, turning her head to the right to address the tall mountain of books stacked neatly at the head of their table, "Is that what you're reading about, B?"

Billy pops up from behind the pile, eyes still trained on a page. "Yeah. When we were at the Yule Ball I was looking around at everyone and realised I didn't _know_ much about the other major wizarding schools. I knew they existed, but not many details beyond their general size and plausible location. Figured I'd read up on them all before we get saddled with too much homework."

Kim smiles. "That's sweet. Anything interesting?"

Billy's face brightens, eyes flitting about as he reads. "There's a plethora of information on some of the schools, then next to none on others. But listen to this: 'As the largest school in the wizarding world, Uagadou takes students from all across Africa. More notable than its size, however, is Uagadou graduates' prowess in the fields of Alchemy, Astronomy, and Self-Transfiguration.'"

He raises his index finger in the air. "Here's the good part! 'By the age of fourteen, students have been known to have all but mastered Animagus transformations. This could partially be attributed to Uagadou students (and indeed, the entire African continent) primarily using wandless magic in their spellcasting.'"

Trini pulls a face. "Huh. So kids our age can use wandless magic _and_ transform into animals at will?" She pauses, pulling a face. "Man, I was so ready to dig into this treacle tart... but now I'm just sad."

Zack scoffs. "T, that's my treacle tart."

Trini sighs, staring at the dessert wistfully. "And I was _so ready_ to dig into it, Z. But don't ruin my moment. I'm wallowing in my own magical inadequacy."

Kim makes a disapproving noise, throwing an incredulous look at Trini even though she knows she's joking. "Oh come on, Miss top-of-the-class-in-Charms, you've gotta be—"

Looking pensive, Billy interjects, "Well, Trini, who's to say we couldn't do it too?"

Kim falls silent at once, and all of them watch him with interest.

Billy's brow furrows as he continues, "If they can, we can... magic is intrinsically dynamic. Yes, to get better at casting you need to practice over time, just like anything. But there's another side to it that doesn't follow logical progression at all—which is why you can have such a large group of fourteen year-olds who are leagues more advanced in a certain area than, say, older magical folk who are much more experienced."

Jason nods, spinning his fountain pen between his fingers. "K, I've talked to Mumma Kim about this when she was telling me about her time at Uagadou—"

"Your mum went to Uagadou?" Billy interjects again, clearly trying very hard to keep his voice down. "Is that why you seem to do wandless magic quite frequently?" As he regards her, his face is arranged in a look of pure curiosity.

Kim smiles, making an effort to keep her voice discreet as well, "Yeah, she did. She's born and raised in Uganda. Only came here after she graduated to take the job at St. Mungo's." She pauses, humming. "And it's not that the ability to do wandless magic is particularly hereditary, at least from what I understand. It's just that wandless was the first kind of spellcasting I learned. Sort of like a first language in that sense, I reckon?"

She tilts her head to the side a little. "I was brought up with her just waving her hands at things and doing it that way, so as soon as my magic started to manifest, she started teaching me to control it better. I'm nowhere near as good as she is at it, but I get by okay."

Jason peers at her thoughtfully. "Your mum said wandless magic especially can very much be a mind over matter kind of thing—we've always been told here in Britain that it's only something that _very advanced_ casters can do, but she made the point that if you're constantly told you can't do something, you tend to start believing it."

Kim smiles. "She's great like that, eh? But you're right. In all seriousness, it seems to be more of a cultural thing—both how wandless magic and Animagi are perceived. My mum has some interesting opinions where this stuff is concerned, especially in how it relates to magical population control and such."

She lowers her voice again, "Like, she became an Animagus when she was _thirteen_ , actually. Her birthday's late in the year. It's not easy by any means, but..."

Kim trails off and Billy starts whispering quickly, wearing an unreadable look on his face, "We'd have to take a whole slew of different factors into consideration. First and foremost how legitimately _dangerous_ the process is. And we've the whole Animagus registration law here, too... which is not ideal. It doesn't even exist in other parts of the world..."

He stops talking suddenly, seemingly considering something.

Jason pulls a puzzled face. "Billy, wait, are you serious?"

Zack looks between the both of them, frowning. "Main Brain, I love you man, but if you're suggesting what I think you're suggesting... in't that, I dunno. Dangerous? And sort of irresponsible? I can't go to Azkaban, mate."

"You know it's a serious conversation when Zack, of all people, is talking about _responsibility_..." Trini mutters, then pauses mid-thought. She lowers her voice to just above a whisper and catches Kim's eye across the table, "I mean, Kim, just last night you were talking about, you know, _all that stuff_ happening recently right? Like Wonderboy said then, we can't ignore it."

Kim sees Jason nodding slowly in her peripherals, and she sighs. Because she indeed told them yesterday about the talk she had with her mum and grandparents over the holidays, where her mum explained that her father's 'problem' was getting worse by the day.

In fourteen years, his Dark Mark had not bothered him once. When it started happening at the end of the summer, Kim was hoping that it was a fluke. But for it to be worsening now is as alarming as it is surprising, because it can only mean one thing: some kind of darkness is rising.

And, as impossible as it seems, there's really only one person who could be the source.

Trini continues, clearly troubled, "And if something horrible truly _is_ coming, we're gonna need everything possible in our corner in order to stay... safe, right? This— this could actually be something tangible we could do to help protect ourselves."

She shifts in her seat and leans forward a little, looking contemplative. "Tell me if I'm reaching here, but it'd enable us to hide or sneak about anywhere, wouldn't it? In plain sight of muggles _or_ wizards, no less. And I was just thinking last night again about what happened at the World Cup, and how after that I felt so... helpless, you know?"

Trini shakes her head and looks back at Kim, gesturing toward her vaguely. "And aside from practising every possible spell that could be helpful in a shitty scenario—which I'm sure we'll start doing soon—there isn't much that we can do _at the moment_ to protect ourselves. 'Cause it's going to take a long time for us to get any good with combat magic. Years. And we've _no_ idea when shit's gonna hit the fan—"

At the confused look on Jason, Kim, and Billy's faces, she clarifies with a little smile, "Sorry. Muggle expression—I mean that we don't know when bad stuff's gonna start happening. When all of it's going to explode."

Trini pauses again, furrowing her brow. "That not knowing—it frustrates me. Because I don't wanna be a sitting duck, and I want all of you safe." She taps her fingers lightly on the table. "And this... this would be _so fucking cool_ , in addition to something legitimately practical to have in our pocket if the world starts ending, and all that."

A contemplative silence lingers between them all for a few moments.

"So we're actually… considering this?" Kim asks slowly, looking around at each of them. "Just like that?" 

Trini sort of shrugs, Jason's gazing at the table with his brow furrowed, and Billy's eyes are glazed over, staring at his book.

Zack lets out a heavy sigh. "It just seems like an... extreme thing to go through, innit?" he says, voice uncharacteristically tense. "And don't you lot remember what McG said when we did that unit last year? Just learning how to do it properly can take _years_ if you don't have guidance, and it's mad risky to try without someone around who knows what they're doing."

He rubs at the back of his neck, looking more worn at once. Older, maybe. "Like, T, I see where you're coming from. I really do. And please don't get me wrong — doing that with you guys'd make me _so_ happy. I don't even need some big serious reason behind it because I genuinely've always wanted to. My mum'd read me bedtime stories with stuff like that when I was little: shapeshifters, werecats, groups of people who could turn into animals and roamed the world, the skies, at night..." He pauses, the side of his mouth twitching. "I've always felt like that'd be fucking _wicked_."

"Same," Trini mutters.

Zack nods. "But I can't be that little kid anymore, right? Who'd jump into this without a second thought. I've gotta stop and consider it... my mum needs me, you know?" He shakes his head, letting out another breath.

"That's completely fair," Jason says, giving him a small reassuring smile.

Zack runs a hand over his forehead. "Like, every second I sit here thinking about it, the more I wanna do it." He looks up and glances around at all of them. "'Cause there's nobody else I'd rather go through it all with, truly. I just... we'd have to be _so_ careful."

Trini reaches over and takes his hand gently. "And we'd never pressure you to do it if you don't think you can. But if that's the case, better believe that I'm gonna be right there with you."

"T, don't be daft—"

"Fuck off," Trini huffs, shaking her head. "Becoming an Animagus is a cool idea, sure, but I'm not gonna go through that whole thing without you. Maybe sometime down the line on my own or something, way in the future, but not now—"

"Same," Kim says, looking at him with warmth in her eyes. Entirely, unequivocally sincere.

Because it _would_ be cool, sure, but it'd feel incomplete without Zack. The five of them are something more than themselves together—Kim's felt that way since that first day on the Quidditch pitch. Going through the Animagus process without one of them there would feel empty, somehow. She's certain of it.

Billy and Jason both agree with her and Trini at the same time, sporting matching looks of determination. Deep fondness in their eyes.

"And this isn't a guilt thing, Z," Trini adds quickly. "'Cause compared to how much I care about you, I don't give a flying fuck about being an Animagus. Truly. I'm not gonna resent you for it. I'm certain I can speak for this lot on that."

Kim, Jason, and Billy nod.

"I know you never would," Zack says quietly. "And I _know_ that if we did this it wouldn't just be diving in without looking. I just feel like I have to— I don't know. We've been so much warned against doing it."

He's silent for a moment, and when he doesn't make to talk again, Kim leans forward a little.

"Okay, let's talk for a second like we're considering this. Hypothetically," she says slowly, knee bouncing underneath the table. "Zack, you mentioned the risk when there's nobody around who knows what they're doing, but that's not the case for us. My mum _is_ an Animagus. So are my grandparents."

Kim pauses, trying to pull the mental files on everything they've told her about it over the years. "The process is revered at Uagadou—they prepare so much for it, learn every in and out—but whenever we've talked, they've always said that the key is in deeply respecting the magic that you're getting involved with. Because, yeah, it's incredibly taxing and complicated. Very dangerous if done wrong. But otherwise, it's a set of steps, just like most kinds of magic."

She takes a deep, slow breath in and out. "Like, it's clear from what you're saying that you respect the process and the danger it can bring if done incorrectly, or irresponsibly. That's something, I think."

Trini nods and smiles, squeezing Zack's hand. "I reckon you being apprehensive is good, Z," she says quietly. "It's wise. If you weren't, that'd be the most glaring reason _not_ to do it."

"I _want_ to," Zack mutters, sounding sure. "We just... we have to think about this for a bit. And if we decide to, we can't fuck it up. I can't be here for my mum if I'm some half-transfigured, brainless thing."

Jason smiles, looking for a second like he's about to make a joke, but in respect for the seriousness of the moment—of Zack's vulnerability—he rightly doesn't. Says instead, "I promise you, if we set out to do this, we'll take every single precaution. We'll be smart."

"In all fairness, I don't think any of us would even consider it otherwise," Billy says softly, nodding. "This is not a process to be taken on lightly."

The five of them sit there in silence for a few moments, all contemplating until Billy pipes up again, his voice a touch louder this time, "Plus, for the pure academic pursuit of the whole thing..."

Jason smirks, a mischievous glint shining in his eyes. "Who said school couldn't be informative _and_ fun, right?"

Kim meets Zack's gaze across the table, raising an eyebrow at him in question. He inhales then exhales slowly, turning to his left to look at Trini, then at the rest of them. "I'm always down for a bit of adventure, and I trust you all with my life." He frowns suddenly. "But if I end up turning into a goldfish or summat, I'm gonna be _so_ heartbroken."

.

The next morning finds Trini, Billy, and Kim sat at the end of the Ravenclaw table, making their way slowly through their breakfasts and yawning every few minutes. Excited about the whole Animagus idea, the five of them stayed in the library until it closed at eight last night, reading up on all the information they could get their hands on. They couldn't find a whole lot, but each of them took a couple books back to their dorms, and Trini read until around two in the morning. From what Billy and Kim said, they did the same.

It's twenty minutes to the bell and Jason and Zack haven't even shown up yet, clearly getting a slow start to their morning as well.

Trini takes a sip of her coffee, another bout of warmth flooding her body that's a lot like happiness, and as she watches Kim read her _Daily Prophet_ across the table, a thought strikes her. "I meant to ask—why Ptero? Is it like, _taro_ with a 'T' or is it short for the dinosaur? Pterodactyl?"

Kim looks up from her paper and smiles. "Dinosaur, yeah. When he was really young he used to make these _screeching_ noises, and at first I was worried, but I asked him about it and turns out he's just dramatic." She tips her head downward slightly, making a few soft hissing noises in the direction of the Slytherin crest on her school robes, where Trini assumes Ptero must be, curled up in the little pocket hidden there.

"Makes sense," Trini chirps, laughter in her eyes. "Animals're supposed to be like their owners, aren't they?"

Kim smirks. "That'd be why Sabre's such an arsehole then?"

"To everyone but you, apparently," Trini retorts, then realises that wasn't as much of a retort as it was an admission.

Kim's smirk widens to a proper smile, clearly pleased. "I'm honoured."

With a casual flick of her wrist, Trini tries to wave it off. "Yeah, yeah. Can you read me the League scores, please," she drawls, addressing her bowl of fruit salad.

Kim rolls her eyes. "Only using me for my _Prophet_ subscription, hmm?" she quips, then obliges, leafing through the paper to the back. "The best team in the league won their match against the Wanderers, obviously—" she announces, in her best pompous voice.

"Huh. Didn't think the Tornados were playing the Wanderers 'til the spring."

Kim balks, aghast. "You support the _Tornados_?"

"Best team in the league? Yeah," Trini says, taking a casual sip of her coffee.

"Oh come _on_ ," Kim whines. "I thought I was gonna be able to mould you into a Magpies supporter."

"Over my dead body."

There's a pause where Trini continues to ooze nonchalance, which seems to only make Kim's pouty face more pronounced, looking both legitimately floored and comically offended. "Why the _Tornados_?" she demands, voice still more of a whine than anything.

Trini shrugs. "I've lived just north of Brighton all my life," she explains. "The Tornados and the Wasps are the closest nearby teams, so it was between the two. And my dad's from Manchester—he's supported the Tornados since he was our age." She smirks again at Kim, who's still looking entirely unimpressed. "Picture me as a little kid, right. I couldn't decide what team I wanted to rally behind, so my dad got us tickets to a Tornados versus Wasps match and said, 'Why don't you see which you like better?'"

"What a good dad," Kim says curtly. Stubborn, despite the small smile pulling at her mouth.

Trini nods, smug. "He is! And the Tornados ended up losing... but I took to them over the Wasps. Been a fan ever since."

As Jason and Zack come fluttering into view, parking themselves on Trini's side of the table, Kim groans. "Jase, I've _grave_ news."

He looks to her expectantly, shoveling food onto his plate in effort to eat before they have to leave for class.

"Trin here is a Tornados supporter," Kim says, like she's informing him that Trini's dying.

And Jason has an even more dramatic reaction than Kim did, freezing with a large sweet roll crammed halfway into his mouth and leaning back a little, clutching his chest, wide-eyed. " _No_ ," he gasps, voice muffled by the roll but clearly scandalised.

Kim nods seriously. "Yes."

"You two're something, I tell you," Trini mutters airily, spearing her fork into a strawberry and popping it into her mouth.

"They take the League very seriously, Trini," Billy says, smiling. "Though I don't entirely understand this reaction. Could either of you explain?"

Jason and Kim both start to open their mouths, but Trini holds up a fast hand. "The Tornados and the Magpies've been competing for top spot the last few years, Billy. Which means that we—" she gestures between herself, Kim, and Jason, "are now doomed to be mortal enemies for all time."

"This is devastating," Jason murmurs, shaking his head as he peels the skin off a satsuma with magic, cores it, then crams the entire thing into his mouth with fervour.

"You two are so stupid," Zack mutters, looking between Jason and Kim as he shovels warm oatmeal down. "A couple of overgrown babies, the both of you."

Jason goes to chirp something back at him and stops abruptly, coughing a couple times at his food going down the wrong way. Zack pats him on the back softly, wearing a sympathetic grimace.

Eyes watering, Jason blinks a few times and takes a sad drink from his glass of pumpkin juice, pouting as he carefully swallows again.

"Let's hope your team doesn't choke like that in the match next week," Trini chimes, smiling gleefully.

Kim's jaw drops open, and she kind of just stares at Trini.

Trini stares right back, quirking an eyebrow in challenge.

And after a few moments of this, Kim laughs, and genuinely. "Okay, I'll admit—this'll be fun. Having some proper competition in the group."

"There you go," Trini says, nodding. "Think of all the money you're gonna lose when we bet on shit!"

"Or all the gloating I'll get to do," Kim returns, smiling.

.

In History of Magic the next day Kim's doing her absolute best Diligent Student impression, the crux of which is decidedly not dozing off. To keep herself occupied, she's sending balls of scrap parchment soaring at Trini's head every few minutes, up from the usual one or two at most per class.

Kim, Billy, and Jason are sat in their usual spot a few rows in front of Trini and her roommates, and Kim chances a glance back here and there to see if she's getting a reaction.

Every now and then Mackenzie will hold up a scribbled-on parchment page bearing a number from one to ten, rating Kim's shots. The most recent one was a three, given it _may_ have sailed over Trini's head and hit a Hufflepuff boy in the ear. He looked around, head whipping about and squinting, and Kim's eyebrows shot up as she slunk down into her seat, snickering.

Jason rolls his eyes, grumpy because it's his turn to take notes. "Is this really the best use of your time?"

"Yeah Hart, why're you even _here_?" Mackenzie drawls, voice just barely audible. She's watching them with half her face smushed on her palm, leaning heavily over her desk in their direction.

Will is passed out beside her, hijab pulled down her forehead to cover her eyes and muttering every so often, relaying a _fascinating_ dream that apparently heavily features garden gnomes in petticoats.

Kim spins around in her chair, still a bit slouched, and winks at Mackenzie. "So you can stare at me, of course."

Mackenzie rolls her eyes with such ferocity that it's a miracle her eyeballs don't end up on another plane entirely. "Aren't you a tease. Is the whole schoolgirl strategy of pelting your crush with rubbish during lesson not working for you?"

Kim gives her a smug stare. "It's working just fine, thank you," she replies, grabbing another ball of scrap parchment, checking to see if Binns is looking, and flicking her wand to send it sailing back at Trini.

Peeking out from around Mackenzie, Kim finds Trini staring at her, looking unamused at Kim's shot evidently finding its mark. A twinkle of playful warning is in her eyes, visible even in the space between them.

Kim counts this as a win.

She flashes the goofiest smile she can muster at Trini and turns back around in her chair proudly, bouncing her leg under her desk as Binns lectures away.

Another ball of parchment appears, coming from behind them and artfully spinning around Billy before settling atop the book he's reading on muggle electronics. He hums quietly, and Kim goes to reach for it, but he slaps the back of her hand gently.

She takes her hand back, jaw hanging open in unbridled delight at the action, and tries to peer over his shoulder to read it.

But he turns his back to her, tipping towards Jason, eyes flying over whatever's written there before pocketing it carefully. After a few moments, he spins in his seat a little to look at Kim with purpose and says, "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

Kim blinks her surprise at him, raising an eyebrow expectantly.

Billy purses his lips, trying to keep from smiling. "To help Binns to the other side."

And as he says it, a strange, warm sensation erupts from a spot on the back of Kim's right shoulder, like a small shock. Her body begins to react before she can even process: a smile starts growing on her face as a low chuckle begins in her stomach, and she squirms in her seat.

"Oh _no_ ," Kim murmurs, making a few strangled squeals in the back of her throat. Her eyes crinkle at the sides and she bends over in her seat, a full-blown _cackle_ taking her over entirely as a tickling sensation spreads through her entire body.

She clamps her hand over her mouth and slides out of her seat entirely to take refuge hunched beneath her desk, shoulders shaking.

Ptero carefully pokes his head out from the neck of her robes. " _This is peculiar_ ," he hisses quietly. 

" _Harmless_ ," Kim replies, running the pad of her index finger over his neck gently to assure him she's fine.

And within a few more seconds she's laughing like she has only a few times before; on younger nights when she was exhausted and delirious, Jason and Tommy with her, finding some arbitrary thing hilarious and being unable to stop.

Given she's not hidden very well—her seat is on the end of their row next to the aisle—some people are peering at her now, most not looking too bothered by the interruption, given a wide variety of conversations and activities tend to take place in this class as a way to pass the time.

Kim's teary and squirming about at the feeling crawling over her skin, hand firmly over her mouth to try and keep herself quiet. She looks up at Billy to see he's watching her, the smile on his face resembling the one he usually wears when he's about to blow something up in the name of learning.

It's his _diabolical_ look, and she splutters out, "You— _traitor_."

Jason's throwing glances at her every few seconds—certainly aware of what's going on, given he would likely be under the desk with her and trying to help otherwise. Clearly a touch concerned, though, as he continues to diligently write notes.

And a few other people are chuckling in the vicinity, guessing what happened by way of Kim's jerky movements—that she's been hit by a Tickling Charm.

"F— fin—" Kim stutters, wiping at her teary eyes and trying to use a general Counter Spell. "Finite— incan—"

With a small whine, she gives up to mutter a soft, " _Fuck_."

Making up her mind, she crawls up onto her chair again.

With a lurch Kim gets to her feet and starts down the aisle, aiming for the door at the back of the classroom. She wraps an arm around herself and walks with as much dignity as she can muster whilst _cackling_ behind her hand like an idiot, passing mostly good-natured smiles sent her way from other students.

As she approaches, Trini is watching her with a smile that matches Billy's: extremely satisfied and outright devilish.

Doing her best to be smooth, Kim goes to pass by her and reaches across Chip to grab Trini's arm, who just grins and allows herself to be pulled out of the classroom, with no objection from Binns at all as they exit.

They come out into the empty corridor and Kim tugs her away, twitching as if having a fit, tears streaking down her face and boisterous laughter echoing off the ancient stone.

Kim pulls Trini into an unused classroom, shuts the door with as much grace as she can manage, and bodily shoves her into the nearest seat.

Trini looks up at her with a quirked eyebrow, clearly surprised; something like happy challenge flashing in her eyes at the rough action. Leaning back casually in her chair, she crosses her legs with her right ankle over her left knee.

She gives Kim a cocky smirk.

And Kim's heart flutters, the tips of her ears reddening—

_This is NOT the bloody time, you bisexual fuck waffle._

Kim shakes her head like she's ridding water from her ears. "You—" she starts, pointing a finger at Trini and trying to look menacing through her own maniacal smile, incapable of standing still, "have— to—"

And Trini just stares back innocently, expectant as Kim squirms in place, resolve crumbling quite literally as she slumps dramatically onto the floor next to the desk and groans, "...stop it.

"Do I?" Trini replies, still smirking as she looks down at her.

"I'm— gonna _die_ ," Kim splutters, taking Trini's hand and bringing it to her forehead like she's looking for some kind of religious blessing. All the while silently thanking Past Kim for not drinking much in the way of bladder-filling liquids before leaving for class this morning.

"What'll you do for me if I stop it?" Trini asks, smile growing.

Kim throws a death glare at her. "Any— thing."

There's a devious light in Trini's eyes as she considers for a few moments, evidently delaying for the sweet torture of it all. "You have to wear my Tornados cap the entirety of our Hogsmeade trip next week. Uncovered, no trickery."

Completely aghast, Kim's eyes widen comically. "Y— you— _monster_."

Trini flashes her most spectacular Cheshire Cat grin, shrugging and getting to her feet. "Take it or leave it."

Kim grabs at her leg wildly, curling into the fetal position and now _weeping_ with how hard she's laughing. The sensation is certainly not unpleasant, so Trini could very well decide to just leave her here.

"O— K A Y!" Kim whines, now smacking Trini's foot repeatedly. "Save m— me."

" _Finite Incantatem_ ," Trini says at once, pointing her wand at Kim. The tickling ceases immediately, and Kim sprawls out to lay on her back, huffing out ragged breaths like she's just run a marathon.

Kim lets out another sad groan and addresses the ceiling, "Your joke wasn't even that funny."

Trini tilts her head and brings her wand up again, that same twinkling warning flashing in her eyes. "You sure? I've been lauded for my Binns humour."

Kim huffs and smacks her leg again. "You can't juST HIT ME WITH A SPELL EVERY TIME I DO SOMETHING YOU DON'T LIKE!"

Trini quirks her eyebrow. "If I did that, they'd rename you Cackling Kim within days."

Kim stares at her, unimpressed. After a few moments, though, a small smirk starts to play at the corner of her mouth. "Or Ha-Ha- _Hart_?"

Trini throws her head back in a good imitation of an exasperated film star and closes her eyes, shaking her head slowly. "Why are we friends," she whispers to herself, in a tone of complete and utter disbelief.

And without further ado, she leaves Kim in the classroom and walks out into the corridor.

"Don't LEAVE me," Kim calls, still splayed out on the floor.

Trini pokes her head back into the classroom, regarding Kim for a few moments. "Wanna skive off the rest?"

Kim glances at the clock on the wall. They still have half an hour. "What did you have in mind?"

"I mean, I've Defense next," Trini says, shrugging again. "So we can't do anything too crazy."

Kim makes to get up and Trini steps towards her, offering a hand. Taking it, Kim's pulled to her feet and they stare at each other for a few moments, standing quite close.

Trini lets go of her hand, touch lingering for a heartbeat before she mutters, "I've an idea."

A few minutes later, Kim's following Trini up the narrow spiral staircase that leads to the top of the Astronomy Tower.

They emerge out onto the parapets, the chilly but not unpleasant January air greeting them, and Trini takes her wand out to wave it around, clearing some of the snow drifts and drying the stone.

"Is this where you push me off?" Kim quips, following her to the edge. Trini perches on the parapet, legs swinging down into the open air, and pats the spot next to her.

"You'd likely pull me with you. So no."

Kim sits down carefully, shoulder right up against Trini's. They stare out at the grounds, morning light still soft on the snow. The sun peeks through the clouds, observing them warmly as they sit in comfortable silence.

"I come up here every morning," Trini says quietly, not taking her eyes off the horizon. Breath swirling out in front of her face and dissipating.

Kim looks over at her, curious. "Do you really?"

Trini nods, pulling her robes a bit tighter around herself to bar the chilly air. At the action, Kim takes her wand out and taps her shoulder gently, muttering, " _Impervius_."

"Thanks," Trini murmurs, reaching over to tap Kim's forearm with her own wand and casting a Warming Charm. Kim's robes start to steam against the cold, like material fresh from the dryer. Trini does the same to her own robes, sighing contentedly.

Letting out a happy hum, Kim continues to watch her. "Every morning? Yoga?"

Trini nods. "If I don't, my mind tends to start running throughout the day. It's a nice way to decompress."

"I swim," Kim offers, and it's Trini's turn to look over curiously, meeting her eyes. Kim points to the left, where the lake comes wrapping around the castle to the west, towards the general area of her cove. "Over there. A few times a week, super late at night."

Trini hums like she understands, though something else flicks on in her eyes, brow furrowing. "Do you use the front doors to come back in?"

Kim finds that an odd question but nods. "Usually."

"Huh."

Another pause, the two of them content to just sit, before Trini asks, "You've never been seen?"

Kim shakes her head. "Quite good with a Disillusionment Charm." She smiles, tilting into Trini a bit. "You'd be proud, Charms whiz."

Trini scoffs, though she looks pensive. "How long've you been going out?"

Kim makes a noncommittal noise. "Er, a few years, maybe."

"Maybe you and Zack'll both turn into goldfish, eh?"

It oddly feels like a deflection, but Kim doesn't poke it. She hesitates, tilting her head. "I don't actually know what I'd like to be. Do you?"

"Not sure," Trini replies. "It'd be cool to explore the lake, sure, but water isn't really my favourite. Flying'd be wicked, but I do enough of that on a broom already."

"My mum's form is a jackal." Kim bops the heel of her foot against the side of the tower. "Wonder how hereditary it is."

"I've read it depends on the ecosystem in whatever locality you do the spell," Trini says quietly. "No jackals up here, so likely not?"

"Guess that means neither of us'll be turning into a lion," Kim quips, smiling. "I'd actually quite like to fly—soar above everything in a new way. It'd be curious to try... but I'm not gonna get my expectations up for whatever form I end up taking. Don't wanna be disappointed."

"Do you think it'll hurt?"

Kim's brow twitches. "My mum says it doesn't, really. Uncomfortable at first, but that's it."

They're both silent for a minute, breath dancing between them, floating away.

"The idea of it just..." Trini starts, then stops, hesitating. "It's such a cool concept. I'm right there with Zack in terms of it being a childhood dream. Might be a muggle thing—shapeshifting magic is super common in folklore."

"My mum'll still go out sometimes, when she needs to blow off steam. Just to... run. She says there's nothing like it."

Trini nods. "If we actually manage to pull this off, it'll be cool to be all together. Just to explore and shit, you know?"

"A different way to be with each other," Kim says softly.

"Something like that," Trini murmurs, then pauses. "You still good for tonight?"

"Yeah. Had a nightmare about Pince last night and everything. My mind is ready."

Trini chuckles. " _What_ is your deal with her, anyway?"

"She scared the wits out of first-year me," Kim replies, turning to meet her eyes. "I swear she came floating right out of the stacks like a bloody ghoul."

"Ten quid you were eating."

Kim scoffs. "I was hungry!" She pauses as Trini snickers, tipping into Kim's shoulder gently. "May not've seen the signs about no food in the library by that point. The torches were dimmed, like quarter to eight. And she just... appears out of the shadows. Not a sound."

"How terrifying," Trini drawls, laughing proper now.

"It was!" Kim exclaims, laughing too. "She had a copy of the _Monster Book of Monsters_ chase me out, _flying_ after me and chomping at my ankles, along with all the books she was shelving before close. I've never moved so fast in my life."

Trini shakes her head. "Bet you loved when that was on the booklist last year."

Kim shoots her a deadpan stare. "Nearly dropped the class right then, no joke."

"You're so dramatic."

"My mum said the same thing. When we were at Flourish and Blotts, she took one look at it and—" Kim gestures through the air, "ran a finger down its spine. Gave me a glare, all 'You're ridiculous.'"

"Just needed a bit of love," Trini sing-songs, and Kim smiles softly, pleased at how playful she's being.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'now or never now' by metric.
> 
> that bit about uagadou kids being proficient in alchemy, astronomy, and self transfiguration is out of JKR HP universe canon, in her writings on pottermore. as is the fact that all uagadou kids go through the animagus process. not a quote, but the information is directly canonical.
> 
> trini's binns joke is HILARIOUS because he's a ghost! he's the ghost professor! the chicken crossed the road to _help him to the OTHER SIDE!_ GET IT!?!?!? 
> 
> ...I will not be taking criticism at this time. thank u
> 
> \---
> 
> hello, all! here we have SOME IMPORTANT STUFF BEGINNING.
> 
> the kids seem to be playing with the idea of becoming animagi. this will be a major plot point throughout this semester (and the rest of the story, further). researching the process is going to take up a lot of their free time. will they manage it? will everything fuck up spectacularly? only time will tell!
> 
> this chapter has a special place in my heart, mainly because of that kim/trini interaction in the back half. them being playful is just... it fuels me. I love them so very much.
> 
> have a bit of mack and will there too, in brief. kim and mack have a flirty kind of relationship going forward, and you've already seen that in their interactions since mack's introduction. don't hate her for it tho! she's hot and kim's hot! it only makes sense! they're TEENAGERS!
> 
> anyway, so yes. we have one of the Big underlying fic plot drivers coming into proper play now, which is the fact that kim knows that her dad's dark mark has been getting more apparent by the day. this is something that our ranger kids know _before_ harry does in canon, because by what snape said near the end of book 4, it was evident since the summer to any death eater that had been branded with the mark. this story being half from the POV of a kid in slytherin with a parent in voldy's service is very interesting to explore.
> 
> another point that trini brings up — her feeling helpless during the quidditch world cup riots. as mentioned, the kids had a discussion offscreen about perhaps starting to practice basic combat magic soon, which is going to become a thing as well. like, it was alluded to a bit, but the fact that the dark marks are becoming more apparent is a HUGE MASSIVE red flag. the kids' response to it, in terms of wanting to be prepared, is logical.
> 
> as a note RE the whole uagadou students all going through the animagus process, aka those comments billy makes on the dynamic nature of magic: this is A BIG THEME in this story. how magic, in this universe, is both very much a Hard system (by [sanderson's](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hard_and_soft_magic_systems) definition) AND a Soft system at once. it can be almost scientific (Hard) in some senses, like in potions-making for example, where you need a certain amount of certain ingredients and everything has to be brewed in a specific sequence. but then in other ways, it's very mysterious and elusive (Soft). think the love magic we hear about in book 5, or the bond between people that forms when one saves the others life. there are parts of it that are very wondrous and fantastical, and others that are more cut and dry. 
> 
> I always find it such a shame when the HP universe is relegated to only a Soft magic system, because it's really SO much more complicated than that if you take the time to learn about it. and that's not to say there's anything wrong with solely Soft magic, but yes. I have a lot of thoughts on this, evidently. AS ALWAYS, FEEL FREE TO PROMPT ME IN THE COMMENTS, or message me on [tumblr](https://numberfiveisalive.tumblr.com/). I'd love to talk about it (or whatever else story-wise).
> 
> but yes, again, this will be poked at more and more as the story goes on, how magic can so much work in unexpected and undefinable ways. THE WONDER OF IT ALL! JUST!!! and we were first introduced to this in CHAPTER 1, aka the prologue, when trini described a kind of... hum between her and kim the first time they met. that's a riff on the alternate-universe idea of this whole story, how people can find each other across an infinity of times, places, and worlds. but that hum between them, and the weird _click_ all the kids feel when they're together? even before they know each other? THAT is magic in of itself. more to come.
> 
> \---
> 
> thank you for reading as always, friends! comments and such are greatly appreciated. I know a bunch of us are under quarantine/self isolation directives presently, so I hope reading fic can give you a bit of a break from it all. trying to update quicker. 
> 
> stay safe and healthy and keep up your social distancing for the sake of the more vulnerable people in your communities! until next time, and take care <3


	47. I'm Still Here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/6BfOhpHADzrvKN2kMPTMPv?si=wIHYjyFISdubY-NqNp0L6w). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Later that night and Kim's carefully taking her notebook out of her rucksack, only just arrived in the library to start on their Animagus research. She places her old gas lamp on the floor between the four of them, igniting it with a wave of her hand.

Billy's already set up, having arrived first, and Jason and Zack just got here. They're waiting on Trini, then they'll get started proper.

From where he's sat beside Kim, Zack goes to take a bottle of ink out of a pocket in his robes and kind of fumbles, hands grabbing at it frantically before it drops to the floor with a _clunk_ that seems to resound in the silence. Thankfully, it doesn't break.

He sighs heavily, shaking his head a little at himself.

"Hey," comes Trini's voice, making the rest of them jump. "You guys looking to get busted or something?"

She comes walking toward them out of the pitch dark, smirking as she steps over the thick section divider rope. "This place is a restricted area, you know."

"Oh really Einstein?" Zack says, grinning right back. "Restricted, eh?"

"Yep," Trini chimes, plopping down beside Kim on the floor.

"What would we ever do without you? So informative," Kim murmurs lowly, earning her a shoulder check (that's more like a bop) from Trini.

"Listen, I passed Filch on my way here," Trini explains in a whisper. "He's close by, so we have to quit it with the dropping shit." She sends a playful glare at Zack, who holds up his hands in surrender. "And we're gonna have to learn his schedule for the future — how he moves about the castle."

"I already have an idea," Kim says, flipping open her notebook and wetting her fountain pen with her tongue.

"Oh?"

Kim nods. "Mmm. I know all of this place's secrets, Trin."

"You'd actually be surprised," Jason says in agreement, smiling at the both of them as he gets up and ignites his wand to start looking around for some books.

Trini raises her eyebrow and Kim smiles smugly.

"You'll have to show me one day," Trini says then, voice somehow softer.

Her tone makes Kim's stomach somersault for some reason, and she has to force herself to meet Trini's eyes when she replies, "Sure, one day."

Billy pops to his feet as well, beginning to trace his fingers along the book spines, scanning their titles by the light of his wand. He reaches up to grab a thick, dusty volume, and another comes sliding out with it, falls—

 _CLAP_.

The book lands on its spine, opens on the floor, and proceeds to _wail_ like it's being murdered.

They all stare at it for a tense moment, stunned and wide-eyed, before Zack jumps on top of it and shuts it in a panic.

Zack blinks, frozen in place. " _Shit_."

"There's no way Filch heard that?" Billy breathes quickly, looking around at all of them. "Right? He's not close by?"

A soon as he says it, they hear a distinct yell of, "PEEVES!" echo in the corridor outside the library.

"Somebody should've pointed that out," Trini deadpans, already shoving things back into her bag. "Wait, _I_ did."

Kim extinguishes her lamp and grabs the rest of her stuff in a flurry. "Fuck fuck _fuck_."

" _RUN!_ " Jason stage-whispers, shouldering his rucksack and piling the rest of his things into his arms, then taking off.

They all peel out of the Restricted Section, Kim clearing the divider rope that separates it from the rest of the library like a hurdle in a track and field meet. She bizarrely has a memory of muggle primary school flash through her mind (Year 5 maybe, with her mum and dad cheering like _maniacs_ in the stands) as she sprints past the hundreds of dark shelves, all blurring together—memories, volumes, time passing by too quickly for her to glimpse the details.

Jason, Trini, and Billy all have their wands out and lit, the blueish lights jerking about as they run, strobing all over the library in a nightclub effect, throwing the five of them into visual snapshots, freeze-frames every few paces like heat lightning in the summer; no accompanying thunderclaps, just bright flashes in the dark.

When they burst through the doors of the library Trini turns to the right and the boys all go left. Kim swerves to follow her without second thought, and the both of them go sprinting, all out, along the dimly-lit empty corridor.

"PEEVES, YOU'RE IN FOR IT THIS TIME!"

Filch's voice echoes from just around the upcoming corner, so Kim—slightly in front of Trini now—slides to a stop and leads them through a passage hidden behind a tapestry.

They take the narrow descending staircase two, three steps at a time at a breakneck pace.

Really though. Breakneck. Kim hopes she doesn't trip and pile down headfirst.

That would really hurt her cool kid credibility.

She hops the trick step, not even thinking to tell Trini about it until they've both managed to make it out of the passage—luckily safe and un-stuck.

Or... not safe. Filch's shuffling footsteps sound over her heartbeat thrumming in her ears — he, for all of his idiocy, knows this place better than she likely ever will.

Kim points, half turning mid-sprint to direct Trini down another staircase. Instinctively going downward into the bowels of the castle, to where she feels the most safe.

They come skidding onto the marble staircase landing and hurtle down the steps into the Entrance Hall, _still_ hearing quick footsteps echoing off the castle walls behind them, and Kim's aiming for the main door to the dungeons—

But they're not going to make it before they're seen—

She grabs Trini and bodily _tosses_ her by her rucksack into a nearby broom cupboard, piling in after her then shutting the door quietly, the two of them crammed right up against each other in the narrow cluttered space.

They freeze like that, breathing heavily with racing heartbeats, chests heaving—pushing forward, pulling back, a careful dance between their bodies in the dark; steps they're only just learning, not in tandem yet, brushing up against each other, off-beat.

Kim hangs her head down and rests her forehead on Trini's left shoulder, smiling wide at the endorphin rush that floods her brain like a high despite the danger.

"That was—"

Trini puts her hand over Kim's mouth, and with the odd cramped angle it's more of a gentle push of the side of her palm than anything, followed by a let up, hand falling slowly—trailing warning fingers along Kim's lips, still half open—silencing her from saying anything further.

And Kim's heart drops from her ears into the base of her throat.

Trini's hand is really soft.

"Shut up," Trini breathes, a loud smile in her barely audible voice, mouth not an inch from Kim's ear. "He's right there."

Kim stills, hot puffs of air ghosting Trini's slightly twitching fingers. Her hand stays like that, focus clearly elsewhere, entirely on listening for Filch.

And she's not sure how long they're waiting before Trini's hand falls away, tipping the side of her head into Kim's a little.

Trini speaks lowly into her hair, "Okay. Think he's gone."

Kim lets out a relieved sigh and stays there for a moment, forehead still on Trini's shoulder. With a satisfied smile, she tilts back and raises her head. 

Meeting Trini's eyes in the dark, Kim's finds herself at once very aware of how one of her hands is braced on the wall at Trini's hip, how their legs are fitted between each other.

Still feeling Trini breathing against her, slower now.

Trini holds her gaze with a profound softness in her eyes—holds, holds, until her tongue darts out over her lips, so quickly Kim barely sees it, and she physically shifts, straightening her spine and putting a bit of space between them, resting the back of her head against the stone wall behind her. Shuts her eyes, takes a deep breath in and out.

Kim seizes the opportunity to shake her head a little. Smiles wide. "What I was _going_ to say," she breathes, and Trini opens her eyes slowly to fix her with an unimpressed look, "is 'that was close.'"

"As always, thank you for your groundbreaking input."

Kim smiles. "Hey, I got us here, didn't I?"

Trini gives her a small, acquiescing nod. "You did. With your _extensive_ knowledge of the castle."

"Always know the perfect place. It's a gift."

"Mmm. Not a big fan of closets."

"No?" Kim breathes, a twinkle in her eye.

Trini crinkles her nose, smiling. "Nah."

And Kim can't help but grin even wider. "Can't believe we almost got caught on our first night."

Trini huffs out a breath. "I can. It's us—we're all disasters." She pauses, humming. "If I was more of the type, I'd say it's a sign not to continue."

"But you're not."

"No, I'm certainly not."

Kim tips her head playfully. "Great way to start, really."

"Eventful. I shouldn't've expected anything less," Trini mutters, then shifts a little. "Alright, let me poke my head out and check—" she tries to reach for the door and stops, frowning. "You're gonna have to move with me. Otherwise I'll elbow you on accident."

They try to move, struggling at it given they're trying to be quiet, and Trini huffs again before laughing lightly. "Kim, you're _so_ uncoordinated. Pivot with me—"

"There's a bucket right at my foot. I can't move any further from the door—"

"So then come _here_ —" Trini grabs her by the waist and pulls her in even closer, then leads Kim in a slow, careful spin, ending with her back right up against the door and Kim pressed to her front.

"Helloooo," Kim says in her most silly voice, waggling her eyebrows. The lingering adrenaline along with the close proximity to Trini has her head spinning like it does from a particularly good firewhisky, making her sound braver than she feels.

"Christ," Trini groans, clearly amused. "The irony of me being _this_ close to a girl while in a closet. Like, really."

"All I am to you is irony?" Kim asks lowly, pouting.

Trini blinks up at her, something flashing in her eyes for a second before vanishing as a crooked smile pulls at her mouth. "What you are is a pain in my arse," she mutters, voice a bit different, then carefully pushes the door open without further ado.

But Kim hadn't _really_ been paying attention to the door (or the prospect of opening it at all), too focused on Trini, and with her weight still shifted forward she sends the two of them _toppling_ out and into the open space of the Entrance Hall.

Trini manages to half catch herself as she goes down, her back—cushioned by her rucksack—hitting the floor but not her head. Kim comes down right on top of her like a slapstick comedy act, arms flailing wildly then bracing on the cold stone floor in effort to not collide with Trini painfully.

All of Kim's mirth evaporates in an instant; she feels her face flush.

The two of them kind of stare at each other for a moment, faces inches apart, frozen like that.

Clearly surprised, Trini blinks a couple times. "Helloooo," she breathes, doing a decent imitation of Kim's earlier tone.

"I'm so sorry—"

Trini smiles though, shaking her head to dismiss Kim's apology. "This is why I don't do closets."

And Kim huffs out a chuckle before starting to laugh proper, eyes crinkling at the sides. Still embarrassed of course, but Trini's clearly trying to make her feel okay about all of it. Less self-conscious.

" _Ladies_ ," comes Zack's voice then, not loud but carrying across the hall in its otherwise emptiness, with bubbling delight easily evident in his tone.

Not moving from where they're sprawled together on the floor, Kim and Trini turn their heads toward the marble staircase, where Zack, Billy, and Jason are standing on the landing, _beaming_ at the two of them.

"Er—" Kim starts, quickly looking at Trini (who's smirking up at her) then back to the boys.

"Kim and I were in the middle of something," Trini drawls, as Kim scrambles to back off of her carefully.

Popping to her feet, Kim gives Trini a hand up. "No, we really weren't—" she splutters, rubbing at one of her cheeks, trying in vain to hide the blush.

"We were," Trini insists, sending her most innocent, blinding smile up at the boys. "I trust this means Filch is elsewhere?"

Billy nods. "He is. We just wanted to check to see if you two were making out okay. Do you want to go back to start proper? It's still quite early."

"My Main Brain, you make it _way_ too easy," Zack chimes at Billy, then smirks suggestively at Kim and Trini. Clears his throat obnoxiously. "And we _are_ certainly glad to see you were indeed _making out_ okay, if ya know what I mean."

Kim covers her face with her entire hand, still blushing profusely, and Trini looks at her for a moment before furrowing her brow a little.

And, despite her willingness to joke around with it earlier, Trini promptly strides the length of the hall, walks up the stairs, and smacks Zack on the head.

"WHY!" he whines.

Kim waves her hand at the broom cupboard door to shut it then follows up the marble staircase, coming to a stop in front of the four of them. Zack and Trini are still bickering, now wrestling standing up like actual children, and Jason gives Kim a curious look.

She just shakes her head, almost imperceptibly.

Jason nods once. "Shall we get back to it then, gang?" he asks, turning with Billy to walk back in the direction of the library, looking at Kim and smiling softly, holding out a hand to her.

Kim smiles, rubbing at the back of her neck as she walks forward. Interlacing their fingers, she grabs onto his arm and pulls herself into him, feeling much more sturdy all at once.

Trini and Zack cease their poking at each other and fall into step beside them, and they all make their way back upstairs, creeping along the corridors and keeping a keen eye out for Filch or Mrs. Norris.

Once they arrive the five of them walk the length of the library, their way lit only by the light of Jason's wand, before they come to the Restricted Section at the back and start to settle in.

The boys all drop their bags and start to look about for books immediately, and Kim plops down onto the wood floor and takes her lamp out once again, lighting it and placing it in the middle of their little circle. With a deep breath in and out, she rests her back up against the shelf as she begins to take her things out.

Trini sits right beside her, seemingly making sure to have their shoulders pressed together; wordlessly telling her that everything's fine.

And Kim turns her head to look at her, smiles softly in thanks.

Trini smiles right back. "For the record, there're definitely worse ways of coming out of a closet," she says quietly, eyes now focused on flipping open her notebook to a blank page.

"Than with me on top of you?" Kim tries, pulling her own notebook into her lap. Still trying to make sure nothing's awkward, though Trini's clearly being genuine.

Trini hums. "Solid ten mops out of ten."

"Mops? You really know how to compliment a girl."

Trini shrugs, now sporting that same smug look that tends to appear on the Quidditch pitch more often than not. "It's been serving me well so far."

Kim manages to quirk an eyebrow. "Apparently."

Zack comes back then, carrying a stack of books which he places down next to them carefully. With that, he gives them a little bow then flutters off again.

Trini lights her wand and peers at the books curiously, running her finger down the spines before picking one titled _Fifteenth-Century Fiends_. She places it on the floor in front of her then looks at Kim questioningly, who tips her head and grimaces. Both hoping this one won't scream at them.

With her movements careful and slow, like she's handling something that's likely to explode, Trini opens the book. When no piercing noise erupts from it, her and Kim both sigh in relief.

"Merlin," Kim mutters, reaching for a book to get started as well, "going through these is gonna take some serious time off my life."

"Same," Trini says quietly, skimming the table of contents.

Kim's book turns out to be just fine, and the two of them fall into an easy, comfortable silence as they each begin their search. The boys soon join them with stacks of their own, and as they work they're careful to be quiet, save for the satisfying scratch of writing notes here and there.

An hour later and Trini's found brief mentions of Animagi but nothing on the process itself. And Kim, in her third book— _Most Potente Potions—_ has just come across the honest-to-god potion recipe, though there's nothing whatsoever about the process, either.

"That was faster than I expected," Kim whispers, peering at the page as she makes notes. "Either way, good for us." She looks up at Zack. "Nice going on the pick."

"Thaaaank you," he sing-songs, voice quiet.

"So we've got a Mandrake leaf, some dew, a single hair, and one..." Kim trails off, pulling a face. "Er, yikes."

Trini leans into her, peering down at the book in the low light. "What?" Kim points to the ingredient wordlessly, and Trini sighs _heavily_ before she reads out, "One chrysalis of a Death's-head Hawkmoth."

"Crunchy," Zack mutters, smacking his lips.

"At least it's just the chrysalis, not the moth itself?" Billy tries.

Kim nods slowly, reading over the recipe again. "It also specifies the use of a crystal phial—no glass—and a silver teaspoon for the dew. But this is... one of the strangest potion recipes I've ever seen..." she flips the page, and at seeing nothing else on the back, frowns. "In that it's not a recipe? Like, look, there are quite literally _no_ instructions except, 'To be brewed with extreme care, diligence, and to the most assiduous specifications. Any divergence, even by the most skillful Potioneer, will undoubtedly result in catastrophe.'"

"That's nice," Trini deadpans, reading it as well. "But you're right—I've never seen a potion recipe where it's just ingredients then a blank page either."

Kim blinks a couple times. "Do any of you know what 'assiduous' means? I've never encountered that word before."

"It just means diligent, or very attentive," Billy answers. "High attention to detail."

"Thank you."

Zack hums, nodding slowly. "So the question becomes, what are these mysterious 'assiduous specifications'. As for the ingredients themselves, Mandrake leaves are dead easy to come by, which is great." He pauses, brow furrowing as he massages his shoulder. "But the moth chrysalis is a different story, innit. Not a common potion ingredient by any means."

"The dew is curious, too," Jason mutters, frowning. "Does it say how much, or if it has to be off a certain type of terrain?"

Kim hums. "A teaspoon for the amount but nothing on where to source it from."

"It seems awfully odd to just have the ingredients there, but not the recipe itself," Billy says, tapping his fountain pen on his notebook, sending tiny splatters of blue ink onto his page in typical fashion. "Especially in a book like that."

Kim nods. The book certainly has details on some absolutely _vile_ potions; it's strange that the authors would suddenly balk at giving the recipe for something like this.

"It's a start, at least," Jason mutters, beginning to take notes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'i'm still here' by john rzeznik (of goo goo dolls fame!), from the treasure planet soundtrack. SUCH A TUNE! AND A GREAT FILM!
> 
> trini and zack trade a couple lines from the 2017 film. trini's are: 'hey, you guys looking to get busted or something?' 'this place is a restricted area.' and that bit about filch is a play on mine security. then, 'somebody should've pointed that out. wait, I did.' and zack — 'oh really einstein? restricted, eh?'
> 
> and that half-turn kim does when her and trini are running, then the point ahead — that's straight out of the 2017 film too :) as is kim following trini instead of the boys! again, the whole being in the restricted section/running from filch scene is a nod to that first night at the mines. check out the song ['trespassing'](https://open.spotify.com/track/47P3MSBgEAaJQ8ygYao4mu?si=QZjoEsxKTJyHBdR_cnGD6A) from the film score to get even more of a Vibe! that was an alternate title I considered for the chapter, but the chosen title track works so well for the bit where the girls are running from filch in my mind!
> 
> \---
> 
> SO HELLO! HAVE SOME SILLY SHENANIGANS! shorter chapter but again, I'm trying for quicker updates in the midst of our worldwide quarantine, friends.
> 
> briefly, cause I forgot to mention last chapter — that bit where kim and trini are sitting on top of the astronomy tower and talking about how they do yoga/tai chi and swim? that puzzled look on trini's face was her brain going 'KIM IS THE MORNING GLORY KIM IS THE MORNING GLORY HOLY FUCKING SHIT' on repeat for their entire discussion. reference to chapter 9. so trini is !!!! about this. she finally knows THE PERSON'S IDENTITY! AND IT'S KIM! OHOooooOOoOoOo!
> 
> anyway, yes. the kids are in the library! their first real night doing research! that bit about the screaming book in the restricted section is right out of philosophers stone. and the animagus process, I'll say again, is a very complicated bit of magic. the kids are gonna be researching quite a bit in order to try and find each piece of the whole puzzle, as it were.
> 
> I'm not sure if everyone who follows this fic has read the HP books or just seen the films, so for clarity: peeves is the poltergeist that lives at hogwarts. his back and forth with filch, the castle's caretaker, is something we see repeatedly in the books. peeves makes trouble and filch chases him off! that's their dynamic! so that's why filch's first instinct was assuming that the BIG NOISE wasn't students, necessarily. the kids got lucky.
> 
> have a cute little trimberly interaction there, with them hiding together in the broom closet in the entrance hall. fun fact, harry and hermione hid in the same closet in prisoner of azkaban, when they were doing their time turner stuff. GOTTA LOVE CANON ACCURACY!
> 
> and trini makes multiple gay jokes about closets! how nice! she's comfortable enough with kim to do that now!
> 
> believe I've said this before, but that 'main brain' nickname zack uses for billy is straight out of OG MMPR!
> 
> \---
> 
> next time on glee: we have a chapter that spans all of next week. you'll see some hufflepuff interactions, including a cute scene with trini and her roommates dancing and singing in their dorm room. some character development there too, and an update on cedric and how he's doing with the riddle RE the second triwizard task. more animagus research as well! hanging out and embarking on a magical journey together! wahoo! and the chapter after that, we have the first hogsmeade visit of the new year!
> 
> but yes. hope you're all taking care and things. keep up that social distancing! if you have to go out for any reason (besides walks and things, where you gotta make sure to be keeping 2 metres/6 feet away from people when you pass them!) be careful! protect your communities the best you can.
> 
> until next time dudes. thank you as always for all of your lovely comments. YOU KNOW I ENCOURAGE THAT SHIT! IT ALWAYS FUELS ME BUT ESPECIALLY NOW, SINCE IM STUCK IN MY HOUSE! :) 
> 
> until next time <3


	48. Hearts Like Ours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/1GzeyDrul7da45BQASLiKL?si=jFYi_IbZSqi9YmojOJ6duw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Early Saturday afternoon finds the five of them walking back up to the castle, faces flushed and breathing quick from their pick-up game. Trini strips her leather fingerless Quidditch gloves off to reveal a skin-tight, grippy pair underneath, there to keep the cold from biting too much, and peels them off too, cramming all of it into her duffel.

Jason's singing ['We Built This City'](https://open.spotify.com/track/6OnfBiiSc9RGKiBKKtZXgQ?si=SlAQBTbyS_aQfuEGaLG3Tw) by Starship loudly, miming a guitar riff like an idiot and leaning most of his weight onto Zack's shoulder.

Zack just reaches up to pat him on the head fondly, ruffling his tight winter hat to mess up his sweaty hair. Unfazed, Jason switches into ['Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now'](https://open.spotify.com/track/3X7uFMzJrEE0sxn62qd8Ch?si=1gFGTvChQq2HM69vy6frgA) as they come to the castle front steps, doing an absolutely ridiculous imitation of Grace Slick's voice on the pre-chorus. Zack grins and joins in with air drums, pouting and shout-singing along.

"Jesus," Trini mutters, meeting Kim's eyes with a disbelieving smile.

Billy just shakes his head, opening one of the towering wooden doors and holding it for the rest of them. Jason and Zack go parading into the Entrance Hall, arms slung around each other and making for the marble staircase, still singing.

Trini, Kim, and Billy linger just inside, watching fondly as their voices echo up to the cavernous ceiling.

"See you in a bit," Kim says, turning to walk backwards towards the door to the dungeons and adjusting her broom's carrying strap. "Trin, should I bring that record up too?"

Trini nods, following Billy towards the marble staircase in a side-step. "That'd be brilliant."

Kim smiles and opens the door, disappearing through it.

Billy and Trini cross the length of the hall and he hums when she diverges, going to the right as he starts to climb the stairs.

"I should really catch up with them," he mutters, as if to himself, and Trini gestures for him to get on with it.

When he's gone, she walks over to the door leading down to the basement. Warm air greets her as she enters the passage, the smells of supper wafting up and out from the kitchens.

Trini soon arrives in the common room and yawns behind her hand, grabbing at her broom where it's slung across her back so it doesn't smack against the door to the girls dormitories.

Walking into her dorm, she finds Summer _blasting_ Lita Ford's ['Kiss Me Deadly'](https://open.spotify.com/track/1GzeyDrul7da45BQASLiKL?si=jFYi_IbZSqi9YmojOJ6duw) from her fancy gramophone, sitting on the plush carpet in the middle of the room and painting her toenails with a copy of _Witch Weekly_ magazine open in front of her.

Trini drops her duffel and broom at her bunk. Strutting over, she Summons a hairbrush out of the bathroom with a flourish of her wand and begins to mouth along to the words with it, pointing at Summer theatrically. Smiling wide.

"' _Kiss me once, kiss me twice. Come on pretty baby, kiss me deadly..._ '"

She reaches for Summer's hand and pulls her up in a heave, prompting a little squeal and a roll of her eyes as she stands and stares at Trini for a moment.

Trini spins without a care, dancing around her goofily.

And an unavoidable smile sparks to life on Summer's face right before she joins in full force.

They twirl each other around, Summer doing a little jig on her heels in effort not to muck up her nail polish, and Gia comes out of the bathroom with a toothbrush in her mouth, rubbing at sleepy eyes. It takes her all of two seconds before she starts shaking her hips wildly too, sauntering towards them, raising a fist up in the air and continuing to brush her teeth with her other hand.

The three of them dance together like that, laughing and being ridiculous all the way through until the end, where Summer plops right back down to finish her nails as the next song on the album starts up.

And Chip's fast asleep in her bed still, safe in the quiet of the Silencing Charm they each have up around their bunk for this exact reason.

Trini strides over to her wardrobe, taking out a change of clothes and heading for the bathroom. Gia hip-checks her on her way in, and Trini hops into the shower.

She sings goofily with the hot water soothing her tired muscles, finishing up and wrapping her towel around herself. Once she's dressed she hangs around, waiting for the other two so they can all make their way up to the Great Hall for lunch.

Trini grabs her books and stuffs them into her rucksack, pulling on one of the oversized soft grey hoodies she swiped from her dad's closet long ago.

"What's the craic, love? Pick-up good?" Gia asks, pushing her feet into her slippers.

Trini nods, putting her damp hair up into a messy bun and stretching. "Gotta get you out there with us one of these days."

"Maybe when it starts to get a bit warmer."

"Just say when, G."

They head out with a yawning Chip in tow, soon coming up into a gently bustling Great Hall and sitting at their House table beside Megan Jones, Wayne Hopkins, and Susan Bones, all in their year.

Trini rolls her neck and grabs for a slice of garlic bread, dishing chicken Caesar salad onto her plate with a happy sigh.

Summer examines her cuticles, frowning. "What colour do you think? I reckon something darker for winter..."

Gia hums thoughtfully. "Thought you were gonna do rainbow? In't that what you said in Creatures yesterday?"

"Oh, right."

"I'll always support Unicorn-themed nails," Trini says, grinning.

"'Course you would, ya big gay," Summer quips quietly, nudging her foot under the table. "How often do we get a cool animal in Creatures, anyway? Might as well celebrate not having to fear for our lives during lesson." She pauses, peering at Chip with a teasing glint in her eye. "Though I suppose I'll speak for myself, given some of us are _more_ frightened lately. Which I still don't understand in the slightest."

Chip shrugs. "Told you. Not looking to be skewered by that horn."

"But they're so lovely!" Gia says, pouting. "And Grubbly-Plank's a delight, truly."

Trini's hums, brow twitching. "I mean, I'm with you there — all for a bit of a change, and she seems knowledgeable. But I hope Professor Hagrid comes back soon."

Summer's face falls. "Don't know who that hag thinks she is, exposing him like that." She turns to Megan, jerking her head. "Didn't you say something about the Slytherins leaking her info?"

Megan looks confused for a moment before she cottons on to what they're talking about. "Ah, Skeeter? Yeah. Some of the Gryffindors were going on about it in class. Might just be gossip, but I can't figure another way she would've got a scoop like that."

"Granger had this _light_ in her eyes," Wayne chimes, inclining his head in Summer's direction. "Reckon she would've set Skeeter aflame if her and that awful crocodile handbag were to come swinging into lesson."

"Burbage'd do it first," Megan says, smiling as she chews on a chip. "Don't cross a Muggle Studies Professor when it comes to discrimination." She hums, looking at Summer and Trini. "She gave us a little talk about it, actually. Didn't mention Hagrid, but everyone knew what she was on about."

Trini listens, nodding along. With the article published in the _Daily Prophet_ on Monday, Rita Skeeter had exposed Professor Hagrid's half-giant heritage to all of wizarding Britain. Nobody's seen him since, most assuming he locked himself away in his cabin.

They continue to talk until Billy comes sailing in five minutes later or so, smelling like soap and the moisturiser he uses. "Hello, all," he mutters, cramming his rucksack under the table at his feet.

Everyone greets him, eating and chatting away. Kim comes in shortly after Billy, with Zack and Jason behind her by only a few minutes, all carrying their schoolbags; they're all going to the library after lunch to get some work done.

The five of them thought it a good idea, given they used nearly their whole work period on Wednesday to start researching Animagi.

Trini peers at the record Kim's put down on the table: Weezer's self-titled debut [album](https://open.spotify.com/album/1xpGyKyV26uPstk1Elgp9Q?si=kUHtVFmORLu1oRtZTifjpw). They'd decided to start sharing some of the music they liked, and instead of dumping a crateload of records on each other at once, figured one or two a week would suffice.

Running a hand over it, she smiles to herself.

An hour later they're all sitting in the library as planned, quills scratching on parchment and working mostly in silence. Zack's got a book propped open against the edge of the heavy wood table, zooming through their assigned reading on Banishing Charms, Trini and Billy are working on their star chart assignment for Astronomy, and Kim is researching for their end-of-unit Transfiguration essay on Cross-Species Switches. She has three large, open books spread out in front of her, a pencil behind her ear, and a little crease between her eyebrows as she writes on a notepad with a fountain pen. A copy of the play they've been assigned to read for Arithmancy—Tom Stoppard's _Arcadia_ —lays closed on the table, just beyond the reach of her hand.

And Trini finds herself looking up every so often, warm in the quiet of the library with Billy beside her, the smell of fresh parchment and ink in her nose, watching the gentle January sun come through the foggy window and light Kim from behind.

Jason's tipped back in his chair doing the Herbology reading for next week, resting up against the wall and taking point-form notes. It's an easy energy between the five of them, something they've settled into without much effort.

It's a slow progression, friendship. Difficult to quantify, more of a gentle build than a leveling up, Trini's come to realise. 

And it shows in small things: Trini perhaps becoming more comfortable with telling Jason off on occasion when he gets prone to lecture, or managing to find a sweet spot with Zack where they both can stop horsing around and be more serious every now and then. It's Billy touching her absentmindedly when they're working on something together, or finding Kim already smiling softly at her when she looks up.

It's a kind of falling together that's so much different than what Trini's experienced with any other group of people; so right in the five of them as a unit that it still surprises her sometimes.

.

A few nights later, they're back in the Restricted Section researching Animagi. The library stacks loom around them in the pitch dark, all sat in a circle in a back corner, reading by the soft yellow light of Kim's old lamp.

Kim yawns and rubs a bit at the side of her face, taking notes in her leather-bound notebook on the two texts she has open on either side of her. Certainly experiencing a solid case of the Mondays.

Without a word, Zack reaches over and hands her his little canvas bag of chocolate-covered coffee beans, the ancient hardwood floor beneath him creaking with the movement. Kim smiles in thanks, taking a handful and putting them in her lap just as Trini makes a little noise, eyes widening.

"Wait, _wait_."

They all look up to watch her, curious.

"Okay, hear me out—" Trini reaches into her rucksack and takes out a few pages of scribbled parchment notes, drumming her fingers on the first, "what if we were wrong to assume that the difficult 'process' that we always hear about had to do with the potion recipe itself?"

"What if it's... not that it has to be brewed a certain way?" she continues, talking slowly, as if working it out as she speaks. "At least not how we're thinking. Because, here—" she traces her finger over a line on the page, "McGonagall said last year in class that the process varies in how long it takes each person to complete, and for some it takes _years_. I assumed that meant people spend a whole lot of time just trying to find the recipe and then spend forever determining the ins and outs of the whole thing _before_ they start. All because the potion is complicated."

Trini shakes her head. "But looking at my notes now, and given that all this book—" she jerks her head in Billy's direction, where _Most Potente Potions_ is sitting open next to him, "gives us is an ingredients list... I just realised that's not actually what McGonagall or our textbook said? Explicitly, it's the _process_ that can vary in terms of the time it takes from person-to-person, not the information-gathering period leading up to it."

"You figure there's some external factor?" Jason asks, furrowing his brow.

Trini nods. "What else'd explain the variations in time? And it being so vastly different from case to case?" She pauses, eyes flying over her notes. "I reckon someone _could_ take multiple years to deliberate and plan if they wanted, especially if there wasn't anyone around who they could ask about the process. But that doesn't seem to be what's being referred to here."

Kim hums thoughtfully. "I think you may be right," she says slowly, tilting her head. "My mum's told me a bit—not the exact steps, but she's always stressed how complicated it is." She pauses, mind working fast. "Like, Animagus magic is _ancient._ What if it's ritualistic on _top_ of taking a long time to brew the potion itself? What if the potion is only one part of the process?"

"If that's the case, the recipe being absent in here isn't an absence at all, really," Billy says with interest, running his hand over the book. "Because… if becoming an Animagus goes beyond potions and into other branches of magic, having the recipe written here would be incredibly misleading without including the rest of the process as well. And it doesn't make sense to _do_ that, because the book is strictly potions recipes."

They all sit for a few moments in silence, considering, before Zack quips, "Well, I want to do it even more now."

"Even if it takes us a thousand years?" Trini asks, smirking a bit tiredly.

Zack grins back. " _Especially_ if it takes a thousand years, Crazy Girl."

"Quite the challenge, indeed," Billy mutters.

"God though," Trini groans, moving her glasses up to her forehead and pinching at the bridge of her nose. "Being real, I hope it doesn't involve a blood moon. If it does, we're fucked."

Kim grimaces. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves, okay? But I do think I should ask my mum about it... though I don't want to expressly tell her what we're doing. Not sure what she'll say."

Billy hums. "She wouldn't be okay with you doing it?"

"No, no, she definitely would," Kim clarifies. "We've talked about it a bunch in hypothetical and she's super supportive. It's more that I reckon she might have issue with me doing it at school when it isn't part of the curriculum, given how apparently taxing the process is." She pauses. "Not to mention that I'd rather do it without saying anything than risk having to defy her."

"Makes sense," Trini says, giving her a soft smile. "So maybe we'll get the basics from your mum, which'll still be way more than we'd have to go on otherwise. Her experience with this is gonna be invaluable."

Kim nods, then smiles wide. "I'm so excited."

They all echo her, and after a little bit more chatting, return to poring over their books.

It's going to be a long haul, but they're all up for the ride.

.

Trini's sat at the Hufflepuff table for lunch on Wednesday, tucking in to her stew and joking around with her Housemates when Cadwallader perks up, jerking his head towards the doors of the Great Hall. "Here comes trouble."

Cedric's just walked in, hand-in-hand with Cho and smiling as they talk together. Trini's eyes soften a bit at the sight.

Aisha chuckles. "Well, he looks okay now? Not like this morning."

"Oh?" Trini says, frowning.

"D heard someone screaming when he passed by Ced's room on the way to breakfast," Aisha explains, and Trini's eyebrows shoot up. "Guess who?"

Seeing the worried look on Trini's face, Cadwallader waves his hand around. "He's just been... er, taking more cold showers than usual since getting back from break, apparently. His roommates figure he's going a bit mental with the Tournament pressure."

Roger smirks. "You sure that doesn't have to do with—" he waggles his eyebrows in Cedric and Cho's direction, "his new love, there?"

"Apparently not," Cadwallader mutters, shrugging. "Like, it's more than any bloke should need to take a cold shower, if you catch my drift. Complete with the manly shrieks."

Trini hums. "Is he... okay?"

Cedric comes over then, having dropped Cho off at the Ravenclaw table, still smiling. "'Lo, lads."

"We were just talking about you," Trini says, getting right to the point. "New fascination with cold water there, homeboy?"

Cedric opens his mouth then closes it, sitting down across from her. He looks oddly pensive for a moment and peers around conspiratorially, leaning in. "I've a very good reason."

" _Sure_ you do, mate," Roger chirps, guffawing a bit, and Cedric elbows him in the stomach.

"Really," Cedric insists, lowering his voice. "Has to do with the Tournament clue."

Trini's grins wide. "You figured it out?! That's amazing!"

Cedric beams back at her. "I did."

He spends the remainder of their lunch hour filling them in on everything he knows about the golden egg in a hushed voice, even passing around a page of parchment where he's written the riddle down.

When everyone starts to finish up, preparing to make their way to evening lessons, Trini bids them all goodbye and hitches her rucksack up on her shoulder.

She walks over to the Ravenclaw table where Billy, Kim, and Jason are sitting.

"Ready?" Trini asks, looking down at Kim with a little smile.

Kim nods, getting up and slinging her bag over her shoulder. Trini waves goodbye to the boys and Kim takes a deep breath in and out as they make their way out of the Great Hall, heading for the Ancient Runes classroom.

"How's your day?" Kim asks, as they ascend the marble staircase, weaving around people.

Trini shrugs. "Decent. Yours?"

"Can't complain. I love how laid back the start of term is, you know?"

"Same. Gives us more time to pursue... other things."

Kim gives her a small conspiratorial smile. "Did a bit more reading last night. I reckon we're getting there."

"I've never done anything like this before," Trini says, as they continue to make their way upstairs. "It's... different."

"Different good?"

"I think so, yeah. A lot to figure out, still. But we have time."

Kim nods. "Still not sure what I should do about Tom," she says quietly, frowning. "Like, Jase and I obviously want her in on it, but we aren't there yet as a group with her. She keeps saying she's too busy to play pick-up..."

When Kim doesn't continue Trini hums, unsure. "Well, you and Jason can bring her in if she's up for it. Don't think any of us'd have a problem with that. But if she's not feeling it now and decides she wants to later, we can help her out, no problem."

Kim smiles softly. "That's kind of you. I have to talk to Jase again, I figure," she says, then changes tack. "Really though, how are you? How's the anxiety?"

"It's okay," Trini replies, as they turn off into their target corridor. She lowers her voice a bit, "Think we're making progress on the Task stuff, according to what he said today. So I'm happy about that."

Kim brightens. "That's brilliant."

"Still getting those letters?"

There's a moment of hesitation before Kim replies with a small, "Yeah." She runs a hand through her choppy hair. "Another came yesterday."

And at how Kim's face has fallen, shoulders curling in a bit, Trini tentatively reaches over and grips her forearm briefly before letting go. "Well, I know you have other people, but I'm always good to chat if you need it."

"Thanks, Trin."

"'Course. You've got me and I've got you."

.

On Friday evening the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw fourth-years make their way down to Hagrid's cabin through the snowy grounds, finding Professor Grubbly-Plank waiting there for the second week in a row. She watches in silence as the class gathers, hands linked behind her back.

They're soon led around the Beauxbatons Abraxan paddock, Trini's eyes watering a bit at the steam coming off the massive trough full of single malt whisky as they pass. All of the Abraxans are wearing thick horse blankets as they mull about through the snow, shivering much less than they were last week.

As they walk, the Unicorn soon comes into view—brilliant white with gold hooves—tethered to a tree on the edge of the Forbidden Forest and grazing, its horn shining in the orange light of the slowly-setting sun. It looks up at them as they arrive and Trini peers over to Chip, who still seems nervous, given she didn't approach the Unicorn last week either.

"Alright," Professor Grubbly-Plank calls, gesturing to the Unicorn and puffing on her tobacco pipe. "Same as last time — girls, if you could come forward and interact with our friend here a bit, please. Just five minutes or so, then we'll get to the lecture portion of our lesson."

All of the girls in the class begin to walk over but Chip doesn't make to follow. Trini watches her curiously, and Gia starts to move forward but stops when she notices, letting a pair of Ravenclaws weave around her then turning to Chip with a frown on her face.

"So what gives?" Gia asks, eyes warm. "You're still not going to?"

Chip shakes her head, flashing a tight smile. "Nope. Told you — not looking to get gored."

"But you saw it last week, mate. It's quite gentle," Trini says, frowning. "Of all the creatures to be worried about, I really don't think this is the one."

With a little shrug Chip mumbles something incomprehensible, but Summer seems to catch it.

"'Don't figure it would like you?'" Summer asks, tilting her head. "Babe, is this the whole red-hair-is-unlucky worry? 'Cause I thought we were _well_ past that—"

Waving her off, Chip sighs. "I just... how do I know it's gonna be okay with me?"

Trini continues to watch her with a puzzled expression, and then it _clicks_.

 _Oh_.

"Chip..." she starts slowly, "hey, can I ask Grubbly-Plank about it? If that's what you're worried about?"

She gives Chip a knowing look, which is returned by a small nod.

Nodding to herself, Trini holds up a hand to a still-puzzled Gia and Summer, walking through the snow to where Professor Grubbly-Plank is standing with the rest of the girls, all grouped around the Unicorn.

"Er, Professor? Could I talk to you for a moment?"

Grubbly-Plank turns. "Yes?"

Trini jerks her head. "A bit away, if you don't mind."

With a small furrow of her brow and a huff, Grubbly-Plank obliges, following Trini out of earshot of the rest of the class. "Is there something wrong?"

Trini shakes her head. "Not exactly. I suppose I've a question about Unicorns, generally — how can they tell..." she trails off, trying to phrase. "If someone was hypothetically not born in the physical body of what would be considered a—" she makes quotes in the air, "'typical' female, but is one for all intents and purposes, would the Unicorn be able to discern that?"

Professor Grubbly-Plank regards her for a few moments, face softening considerably. "Ah, do you mean in a case of differing gender identity?"

Trini nods. "Yeah. If that person is female and tried to approach the Unicorn, would it rebuke them?"

And to her surprise, Grubbly-Plank gives her a kind smile. "Given I have no trouble, my best guess is that it's safe."

"You—" Trini starts, confused, then her eyebrows shoot up. " _Ah_... gotcha. That's brilliant."

Grubbly-Plank smiles wider. "Indeed. I had the very same concern many years ago." She pauses, considering. "If I may ask, are you inquiring for yourself or someone else? You don't have to tell me who, but if it's another student I'd be happy to speak with them about it, if they're unsure."

"That'd be... great actually, Professor," Trini says quietly, beginning to back up. "Can you just—" she jerks her thumb over her shoulder, "I'm just gonna see if she's okay with it."

"Of course."

Trini mutters a word of thanks and speeds back over to where Chip, Gia, and Summer are waiting, all watching her.

"She's super cool," Trini reports, grinning. "Said the Unicorn'd be no problem, but she wanted to talk to you. Has some insight that might be reassuring. Is that alright?"

Chip nods hesitantly, and Trini squeezes her hand.

"Want us to come?" Summer asks, seemingly getting the gist. Her jaw is set as if preparing to rumble, leaning forwards and making to follow.

Chip shakes her head. "It's okay. Give me a minute."

The three of them watch as Chip goes over to Professor Grubbly-Plank, who sticks out her hand to shake. Chip takes it, and after a few moments of talking, seems to brighten considerably.

And Trini, Gia, and Summer are all _beaming_ as they watch the two of them walk over to the Unicorn, Professor Grubbly-Plank sticking her hand out gently and gesturing for Chip to do the same. The Unicorn greets the Professor warmly, sniffs at Chip's hand for a moment, then bops its snout into her palm.

Turning around, Chip gives all of them a dorky thumbs up.

On the way back up to the castle an hour later Chip's chattering away, her earlier tentative demeanour completely evaporated. "...she said that her wife was the one who encouraged her to approach her first Unicorn, back in the day! They met on some Magizoologist seminar! HOW FUCKING COOL IS THAT?!"

Summer chuckles, clearly genuine. "It's so nice that animals just... get it? You know?"

Chip nods excitedly. "And when she approached one for the first time, it was before she knew if she wanted to have any treatments or anything! No potions! Like, the Unicorn just KNEW?!"

"Unicorns are some of the purest creatures alive," Trini says softly, quoting their lesson from last week. "Almost makes sense that they'd be able to read a person's soul like that."

Chip smiles softly, turning to Trini and gripping her forearm. "T, truly, thanks for asking her for me. I never would've done it otherwise."

Trini makes a vague gesture. "Sorry I didn't realise what was going on sooner."

"Same," Gia says, and Summer nods. "Never any pressure to tell us stuff if you don't want, pup, but you know we got your back."

Chip grins at all of them as they make their way into the castle, entering the Great Hall for supper.

As they sit down, Summer bops Chip's shoulder with her own. "That was right well brave of you, babe."

Trini and Gia both mutter their agreement, and Chip's smile gets wider.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'hearts like ours' by the naked and famous. one of my favourite bands.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO!
> 
> first of all, UNICORNS SAID TRANS RIGHTS! supporting your friends like trini and co did is the best possible thing you can do in that situation! ALLYSHIP!
> 
> welcome to some time passing. things are developing on the animagus research front, the canon plot is moving along, and kim and trini are slowly opening up more to each other. it's good stuff.
> 
> that bit about hagrid being revealed as half-giant by our resident insect rita skeeter is right from canon. she published the article at the beginning of the week, and prof. grubbly-plank took over classes.
> 
> and grubbly-plank being trans is obviously something I incorporated. having queer adults around as mentors and examples IS SO IMPORTANT!
> 
> again, I'm making a deliberate effort to make the story diverse. I've talked about this before in previous authors notes, but that's because it's just... way more realistic to have a large variety of people at hogwarts and in the world. the real world is diverse, and that should be represented in stories, yo. it's also is a bonus sort of FUCK U to JKR and her apparent unwillingness to do so.
> 
> now, you've met megan jones before—remember, she's the one who says that kim 'flirts with anything that moves' in the summer between years 6 and 7. she and wayne hopkins especially become friends to the rangers down the line (out of the three hufflepuffs trini and her roommates sit beside at their house table). and susan bones is lovely too—she joins the DA in book 5 canon, and is amelia bones' niece, who is LOVELY (aka the head of the department of magical law enforcement in the UK. she's canonically murdered by voldemort offscreen later).
> 
> this whole animagus process is going to be a bit of a puzzle, given the school doesn't exactly stock books that outline it step-by-step. that's likely due to what billy mentioned the first time they all talked about it—britain has a law that requires animagi to register with the ministry, in order to keep track. so you're not supposed to just find out how to do it super easy, I guess.
> 
> again! the kids figuring out how to do it is going to take a lot of time and research over months. wahoo! and have an explanation RE the book where they found the ingredients list last chapter. I know some of you were curious in the comments. but again, the kids are just making guesses at the moment. still a lot of question marks there.
> 
> that little joke about cedric taking cold showers is a reference to the second task — cedric's figured the clue out, so he knows he's gonna have to go into the lake. he's trying to prepare in his... own way. in book 4, on the way to hogsmeade (we see the trip next chapter) HRH see krum diving into the black lake, doing the same. at the time, harry hasn't figured the clue out yet, so they're all quite perplexed.
> 
> & we didn't see it in-text, but cedric explains the clue to all the hufflepuff quidditch team proper when he gives them the little bit of parchment where he's written the riddle down. 'come seek us where our voices sound...' etc. krum is going to tell kim and billy that he's figured the clue out in their library hangout time, but trini's aware now that kim and krum are friends, and part of her wants to keep the cedric stuff to herself as a result. it's not that she doesn't trust kim (and it wouldn't matter if kim did tell him, really)... but they aren't there in terms of trust just yet.
> 
> but yes. that short one-on-one between kim and trini is brief but important. it has kim asking about the anxiety — remember, trini's been much more anxious as of late, given cedric's in the tournament and all. kim is a GOOD FRIEND! she's trying to help! 
> 
> as for another letter coming from kim's dad, she's still not opening them. and though she trusts her roommates, she doesn't exactly want to leave the letters laying around. so she's going to be carrying them everywhere from now on, at the bottom of her rucksack. can be seen as a literal, physical manifestation of how it's following her around. weighing on her subconscious, yaknow?
> 
> \---
> 
> thanks for reading as always, dudes. next chapter is the first hogsmeade trip of the new year. features some drunk shenanigans between the kids + kim and jason acting like actual children. 
> 
> again, I'm trying to get these updates out faster to you but I'm having a bit of a tough time with that! so expect a normal update schedule for the most part, mmkay? if there are typos or anything I apologise in advance. this one gave me some... trouble.
> 
> hope you're all taking care. thanks for all the comments and for taking time to keep on this train with me! <3


	49. 14 Forever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/53hNQ8XbuelGwddLqhQ4gx?si=ft63RrkzRsijxM-wntX1mQ). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"Say you're sorry!" Kim murmurs, laughing while struggling to hold Jason in a sloppy headlock, both of their schoolbags discarded and forgotten a few feet away. A quiet, light snow is falling around them, down from a burnt orange night sky that promises to have a fresh new layer on the ground by morning.

The street is empty where they are, Hogsmeade hushed but not quite asleep yet; some students still hang about further down the way, happy to make the most of their night off.

And if the word 'comfort' was a place, Trini imagines this might be what it would look like—right here, right now, the five of them existing in their small corner of the world like this, set against a night brighter than it conceivably should be at this hour. The new snow glitters on the ground, untouched diamonds winking at them in the dark, unearthed by the soft orange light of the streetlamps that glow to match the sky.

Trini, Zack, and Billy are watching Kim and Jason wrestle from a safe distance away, all wearing fond looks on their faces, backs up against the outer side wall of a shop. They're a slight bit less drunk than the other two but remain amused all the same, silently passing Trini's brass flask between them and watching the action.

With a wave of his wand Billy brings Kim and Jason's bags sailing over, saving them from being trampled in the fray. Smiling, Trini takes Kim's.

Billy drapes Jason's messenger bag over his shoulder and shakes his head fondly, watching them slip and scramble, both grumbling, as Zack rummages into his own rucksack brings out a packet of _Jelly Slugs._

He holds it out in silent question and Trini takes one, tearing it in half with her teeth—strawberry flavour—observing with interest as Jason knocks the Tornados cap off Kim's head.

With a small chuckle Trini Summons it over, placing it safely in her bag. Figuring Kim's fulfilled her promise by now.

"I didn't— DO anything though!" Jason huffs, making to pull himself free of the headlock without much success.

"You called me a PRAWN!" Kim exclaims, scandalised, trying to knock her knee into Jason's to get him to collapse to the ground.

"YOU _ARE_ A PRAWN TO ME! LIFE IS—" he grunts, attempting to pry her hands apart, "SUBJECTIVE, KIM!"

"PRAWNS ARE UNATTRACTIVE!"

"AYE, HOW CAN A CRUSTACEAN BE UNATTRACTIVE?"

"THEY'RE SCRAGGLY!"

"WELL... SO ARE YOU!"

Kim looks appalled for a moment then slips deftly around, leaping up onto his back entirely and tightening her hold. "I'M STILL HOTTER THAN YOU!"

Jason tips forwards, but her grip is unrelenting. "THAT'S— DEBATABLE!"

"NO IT ISN'T!"

"WHY'RE YOU SO CRABBY TODAY—"

"DO NOT _PUN_ ME, JASON SCOTT!"

Not taking her eyes off their free entertainment, Trini leans toward Billy and mutters, "Should we separate them?"

Billy grins. "In the past, I've found that separating them ensures they'll be at it again, usually within minutes. But could be a few hours."

Zack chuckles. "So let 'em get it out of their systems?" he asks, and Billy nods.

"Being called a prawn really isn't an insult," Trini says, shaking her head. "Kim needs to embrace the whole being short thing. Compared to you lot, at least."

"Or she could—" Zack slurs out, then clears his throat obnoxiously, "just embrace _you_ , as it were. Horizontally, of course, given you're both already so close to the ground, innit—"

Trini's buzzed brain takes a bit longer to process than usual, but once it clicks Zack's already taken off down Hogsmeade's High Street, cackling like a maniac.

She passes Kim's rucksack to Billy calmly—who takes it with a twinkle in his eye—and sprints after Zack then, yelling, "YOU _BETTER_ RUN!"

Drawing her wand, she brandishes it like a lasso at him and sends a charmed rope shooting out. It hits its mark, looping around his ankles, tripping him up and sending him flying forward spectacularly.

Trini catches him with another charm before he hits the ground and brings him floating back towards her, hanging upside down. Across the street Jason and Kim continue to struggle with each other, now devolved into rolling around in a snowbank like puppies with Billy supervising.

Once Zack's in front of Trini proper, the blood already rushing to his face, he gives her a stupid grin. "I'd apologise, but I right meant every word."

Trini glares. "How about you have a time-out to think about that, then get back to me." She flicks her wrist and he _shrieks_ like an idiot as he's sent floating up and away from her — in thirty seconds, she's tied the rope by magic to the top of a streetlamp post.

Zack hangs there by his ankles, swinging back and forth gently like a pendulum, dangling his arms and flailing.

"Triniiiiiiiiiiiiii," he whines, pouting.

"Nope," she drawls, turning away from him and walking back over to Billy, making fresh tracks through the untouched snow. He holds Kim's rucksack out for her and she takes it.

Billy smiles, jerking his head in Zack's direction. "Straight out of a _Spider-Man_ comic."

Trini grins back. "I've always wanted to do that."

He sighs and looks over to Jason and Kim. "Maybe we really should separate them?"

Trini considers for a moment. "Might be able to do one better," she says, voice slurring ever so slightly, then puts two fingers in her mouth. She pauses, looking back to Billy. "Is whistling okay?"

"Yeah, that's not a Bad Sound."

"Cool."

She steps towards Jason and Kim and whistles loudly.

The sound pierces the chilly night and they freeze in place to look over at her—Kim with snow in her hair and on top of Jason, grappling him by the front of his robes, and him on his back, with one whole leather-gloved hand plastered over her face to keep her at a safe distance. Both breathing heavily, cheeks flushed, eyes bright.

"O K A Y!" Trini barks, throwing an unimpressed glare. "As entertaining as this is, why don't we all go inside? Pint of bitter on me?"

Jason and Kim blink back at her for a few moments before turning their heads to look at each other again.

They don't make to get up, though, so Trini urges Billy to start walking towards The Three Broomsticks. He does, and Jason and Kim seem to register this.

The two of them stand slowly, continuing to hold eye contact like they're locked in a staring contest, each daring the other to make a move. Trini rolls her eyes and Billy leads the way down the quiet street.

"WHAT ABOUT MEEEEEEEE?!" Zack wails, and Trini throws a half-arsed salute over her shoulder. Kim and Jason wheel around as they follow toward the pub, each sending confused looks across the street before they see Zack dangling there like a Christmas tree ornament.

"I left your wand," Trini calls, not bothering to turn around.

"...YOU DID?!"

She doesn't answer, relishing in how the fresh packing snow makes a satisfying _crunch_ sound beneath her boots.

Doing their best at walking like upstanding members of wizarding society, Trini and Billy make to turn into the doorway of The Three Broomsticks, beckoned inside by the happy noise and bustle, greeted by the warm, woodsy air.

But Jason—apparently intent to capitalise on Kim's inattention—reaches over and shoves her sideways without warning. With a lurch, she goes skidding into the snowbank right next to the pub and lands on her side with a _thud_.

Some other patrons cluttered around the entrance look over at Kim curiously, but she seems unfazed; a dangerous glimmer flashes in her eyes as she bounces right back to her feet and takes a run at Jason.

From their place in the recessed doorway, Trini and Billy watch Kim go _sailing_ across their field of view, quite literally diving through the air with abandon and smiling in a way that makes her look like a fucking maniac.

She collides with Jason and they go crashing to the ground again, immediately grumbling and rolling around, wrestling, each trying to get the other to surrender.

"Just leave them," Trini mutters, ushering Billy into the dim light of the pub. "They'll join us when they're done. Want that beer?"

Billy starts to remove his scarf and huffs out a little sigh. "Yeah, let's do it."

Trini peers around, scanning for an empty booth. It isn't too hard to find one, given it's getting a bit late in the evening, and she walks Billy to it before redirecting her steps to the bar.

Removing her gloves and pocketing them, Trini orders two pints of bitter. And as Madam Rosmerta turns around to fill their glasses from the beer fonts, Trini throws a quick glance around then swipes a used shot glass from the bar, placing it carefully in her pocket for later.

"Two bitters," Madam Rosmerta says, sliding them across to Trini and giving her a warm smile. Trini's stomach does a Gay Flip and she pinches her thigh to try and avoid blushing as she pays, muttering her thanks.

She speeds back over to Billy and places his beer in front of him. He beckons to her, indicating he wants her to sit on his side of the booth, and Trini smiles before plopping down and shrugging out of her cloak.

"To us," Billy says. They clink their glasses together and each take a big gulp of their ice cold beers, sighing contentedly.

They're silent for a few minutes, sitting and enjoying each other's company before he speaks again, "How're you doing, Trini?"

She tips her head back on the booth and rests it there, closing her eyes. "I'm alright. Can't believe we're about to begin a serious, life-changing magical process with those—" she jerks her head towards the door, "morons, though."

Billy smiles. "But there's something about all of us together, isn't there?"

At this, Trini can't help but smile back. Though Billy isn't the best at catching things like sarcasm sometimes, he has an intuitive understanding when it comes to her; he can read between the few lines she offers and hear the statements between her words. And she knows she can do the same for him, better than even Jason can most of the time.

So he could certainly hear the love in her voice despite the deadpan, translating it to mean she's expressing fondness, coloured with what might be a bit of awe.

"There is," she replies, pausing, considering if she wants to voice her thoughts aloud, though the alcohol on her lips is urging her words to come out easy. "I wanna hold onto it more than I'll ever be able to express, but I reckon a part of me'll always be worried it's gonna collapse. Seems too quick... too good to be true."

Her thoughts are a bit jumbled, but Billy seems to understand, tilting his head. "The best things often do. But it's like anything, you know? If you build on a good foundation, the structure is more likely to stand the test of time." He pauses, staring at her for a few moments in silence, as if trying to ascertain something. "And we have that — think about it. Here—" he turns towards his rucksack, "logic this with me, Trini."

Trini smiles softly and watches him, noting the happy haze in his eyes as he digs into the front pocket of his bag, bringing out his leather-bound notebook and a fountain pen.

Laying out the book on the polished wood table, Billy starts to draw. He talks in a reassuring, gentle kind of voice as five little circles appear on the page, "We had some very solid supports in place already, even before that first day we met to scrimmage—" with a smooth hand, he begins to draw lines between the circles, "Jason and Kim have known each other their whole lives. Jason and Zack are roommates. Then we have Jason and I, you and I... then you and Zack. Kim and I."

Billy pauses, humming. "Jason and Zack weren't particularly close, per se, but they always revolved near one another." He draws a line between their circles. "You and Zack became friends in the last year or so, but you clicked immediately. Kim and I are glued together forever now, I expect, by our mutual love for Jason."

"So when the five of us came together, it became a matter of simply hitching tethers between the ones not already strongly connected: Zack and I, you and Kim, you and Jason, and Zack and Kim." He looks up and smiles at her. "Indeed, we are, in a way, five strangers who happened to click. But there were also ties underneath—it's mathematical, like Graph Theory. Each individual relationship is vital in context of the whole. There's a very solid foundation there, Trini."

The door to the pub opens and the group of smokers from earlier saunters inside, followed by a beaming Zack, looking very pleased with himself and brushing snow out of his hair.

Trini smiles at Billy. "You're rather good to have on my side, you know that?"

He shrugs. "It's hard to reason out interpersonal relationships," he closes his notebook, placing it back into his bag, "but it can be nice to highlight where patterns or structure can be found. Knowing you, I thought you might like the reminder."

"Thanks, B."

"Of course."

Trini sighs and takes another long pull of her beer, eyes wandering back to Zack, who's scanning the pub, squinting. After a few more moments he meets her eyes and smiles even wider, throwing his arms out at his sides as if to say, _'Look what I did!'_

And she can't help but beam back at him, feeling a bit of silly pride stir in her chest. He comes over and drops his cloak on the booth seat, peeling his gloves off and letting out a sigh as he tosses them onto the far end of the table.

Billy stretches his hand out and waits expectantly, and Zack brings his fist up. With a few inches of space between their hands they flutter their fingers like idiots, not touching, but it's akin to something like a secret handshake all the same, and Trini's heart warms at the interaction.

"What you drinking, friends?" Zack asks, looking between their near-empty glasses.

Trini shakes her head, making to get up. "I got it, Z."

He waves his hand. "Allow me."

She watches him for a moment. "If you're sure— bitters."

"Cool. Be right back."

Billy cracks his neck and finishes the rest of his beer, watching with a playful light in his eyes as Trini takes her previously-plundered shot glass out of a pocket in her robes. Holding it between them and slightly under the table, she pokes it with her wand and mutters a cleaning spell, then makes two copies by magic.

Once Zack comes back with their pints, she's poured three shot glasses full of single malt whisky from her brass flask. Slides one across the table to him by way of greeting.

"Thank you," Zack says, holding up his shot. They all cheers and knock them back, each pulling a bit of a face at the taste. The new beer is cold and smooth, though, and soothes the semi-pleasant burn in Trini's throat.

"Did you happen to see the other two on your way in?" Trini asks, stowing her flask back in her robes and putting an elbow up on the table. Rests her chin on her hand with a sigh.

Zack nods. "Looked like they was nearly there. Getting a bit sluggish."

Billy hums, furrowing his brow. "I know the two of them seem like caricatures when they act like this, but my suspicion is that this type of clowning around is something they both've sorely missed."

Trini's surprised at the statement, hesitating for a few seconds as she watches Billy. "It kind of breaks my heart, you know?" she says quietly. "Just to see how they are now, where it's so evident how much they adore each other, Tommy included. It's mad to think about how they all lost that for... what, three years?"

"Yeah. It's jarring how different Jay is now," Zack says, and Billy nods in agreement. "Like a physical weight's gone from him, serious. He's a completely new bloke."

"And entirely the same, in many ways," Billy mutters, pensive. "But most definitely easier to laugh, quicker to smile." He pauses, meeting Zack's eyes. "And I was very wary of Kim at the beginning, because Jason told me everything — but her effect on him was nigh instantaneous. It was quite bewildering, how rapidly he became... lighter."

"See, I didn't know about any of what happened with them, not really," Zack says, looking upset with himself. "I sort of hate how him and I could've been proper mates all of this time and just... never were. Like, we were, but never got to each other's hearts, I guess."

Billy smiles sadly. "That's not your fault. Jason had—and still has—issues putting his trust in people. Which is understandable, in his case."

And Billy doesn't have to explain that he's referring to just how badly Kim broke Jason. It's not hard to grasp why he would have trouble trusting other people after what happened.

Trini sighs, nodding. "It is. But god, I'm so happy that he let Kim back into his life." She throws a quirked eyebrow at Zack. "And if you start on about how her and I should embrace _horizontally_ again—"

Zack holds his hands up in surrender. "I won't, Crazy Girl." He pauses, smirking. "At least not right now."

Trini glares. "I just mean that I can't imagine any one of us not being a part of our little group."

"I'll drink to that," Zack chirps, raising his beer for a cheers.

The three of them clink their glasses together and take long pulls, falling into an easy chatter for another five minutes or so before Kim comes walking through the pub door, clearly exhausted but smiling, towing Jason behind her gently by the hand.

They both look disheveled—hair damp from rolling around in the snow and cheeks kissed rosy by the cold—but content; their spat settled. Jason spots them first, dipping his head down to Kim's and whispering in her ear, jerking his head their way. Billy waves and Kim's eyes light up, a smile blooming on her face that makes Trini's heart flutter a little.

Looking to run from her problems like any good Avoidant Gay, Trini gets up out of the booth and smiles at the both of them before departing with a lurch, walking over to Madam Rosmerta at the bar and ordering another round for their table.

Zack appears at her side a few moments later, so quick that he could have materialised out of thin air. Trini, in turn, experiences a minor heart attack.

"Jesus, Z."

Leaning on the bar with his elbow casually, his soft smile briefly turns to a grimace in apology. "My bad. I er, just wanted to say—if the teasing bothers you, I'll quit it. Truly. You know I do it 'cause I love you." He pauses, narrowing his eyes a little. "And because you two'd be adorable together."

"Yeah, yeah," Trini drawls, though she can't keep her affection for him from leaking into her voice. "You don't have to stop—it doesn't bother me proper. I'd do the same to you given the opportunity."

She pauses, opening her mouth then closing it. A behaviour of Kim's she's picked up, apparently. "My main thing is... if you keep teasing me and she keeps hearing it, won't she start to think I'm obsessed with her or something...?"

Zack frowns, all joking dropping from his demeanour. "Mate, you know she'd never. She's not like that at all."

Trini sighs, rubbing at one side of her face roughly. "I know, I know. I'm projecting some kind of internalised bullshit." She pauses, trying to will her brain—which can currently be found doing a lazy backstroke through all of the alcohol she's consumed in the last few hours—to come up with something halfway coherent. "I just— I think she's incredible, and you know that. But she's way out of my fucking league—"

He looks like he's about to vehemently disagree so she holds up a hand. "She _is_. You won't convince me otherwise. Not to mention she'll never fancy me like that, so I can't let myself think of her in any way other than platonically."

She frowns, drumming her fingers on the bar. "I've... never really experienced this kind of attraction before her, though. I told you that. But I don't wanna fuck this up." Zack raises his eyebrow, skeptical, and she huffs. "I can compartmentalise if I have to. I love her as a _friend_ — she's so smart and funny and thoughtful and beautiful and I want her in my life and—"

Trini stops talking abruptly, eyes widening a little at a sight over Zack's shoulder. "Ohmygod she's coming over here HIDE me—" he goes to turn around and Trini grabs his forearm in a vice grip. Discreetly. "Don't look. Hide me in your cleavage."

Zack starts cackling, clearly delighted by both the comment and how frazzled she is. He flexes his pecs like a moron, muscles jumping underneath his fitted black shirt, and Trini glares by way of response.

"What's the joke?" Kim asks, sailing up to the bar.

"My life," Trini mutters, which makes Zack laugh even harder. Madam Rosmerta comes through with their pints, and Zack grabs four in his arms carefully, winks at Trini, then walks back to their table without another word, still laughing.

Kim peers between them, seeming apprehensive at Zack's abrupt departure. "My bad, did I interrupt?"

Trini hates herself for how her drunk heart melts, wanting immediately to assure Kim that everything is fine. "No, no. We were just fucking around. Are you here for another drink, or?"

Kim looks confused. "Another? I haven't got one yet." She pauses, lowering her voice conspiratorially, "Unless you count the flasks."

Trini grabs the remaining pint on the bar and pushes it gently into Kim's hands, who seems genuinely surprised. "I meant this. Do you want something else...?" A thought strikes her, and she half-turns back to the bar, catching Madam Rosmerta's eye. "Should probably get you something warm so you don't get sick — Hi, sorry, two more things: can I get a mulled mead too, please? Double-spiced? And a hot butterbeer?"

"Sure thing honey, no need for apologies," Madam Rosmerta replies, finishing up a Gillywater for an older witch sitting a few stools down.

Trini slides some coins over. "Thanks." She glances back to Kim, who's looking at her with something stirring in her eyes that Trini can't place. "Wait, did you not want that? Shit—"

"Trin," Kim says, putting a hand on her forearm to get her attention back. "That's perfect, and so is the beer." She takes her mulled mead with a soft thank you, gaze drawn to the steam coming out of the top of the short flagon. "You didn't have to do that—"

To stop a trademark Kim Ramble from getting going, Trini wedges Jason's butterbeer against her torso with her forearm, then takes Kim's pint of bitter from her hand and grips it carefully, reaching down to tangle their fingers together.

Without a word, Trini tows her back to their booth, where she's unimpressed to find the three boys all on one side. "This the seating arrangement again, eh?"

Zack flashes a blinding, innocent smile. "Yep," he chirps, eyes flitting down to their adjoined hands.

"Lovely."

Trini deposits Jason's butterbeer in front of him and scoots into the booth, giving Kim's hand a light tug before letting go. Kim follows in, sidling right up against Trini and tipping a bit into her shoulder, and the five of them fall into an easy chatter, happily buzzed after drinking all evening.

A few minutes later Kim makes a spluttering noise and hurriedly begins fishing through Trini's rucksack, soon bringing out the Tornadoes cap with a look of triumph.

Clearly pleased with herself, Kim places it backwards on her own head and smiles at Trini goofily.

And in the dim light of the room, amongst the happy haze lingering in her mind, there's an incredible lightness that sweeps over Trini then; warming her from the inside out, bright and alive to match Kim's laughing eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is '14 forever' by stars.
> 
> \---
> 
> welcome back to hogsmeade! some soft shenanigans here for you today! and as a belated note from last time, happy TDOV (march 31st). you are all very loved and incredibly amazing. 
> 
> this chapter is just one big easy interaction between the kids. some trini and billy one on one there, which I always love so much. and that bit where trini tells zack that she's never really experienced this kind of attraction before kim -- that's a nod back to their chat in the library before winter break, when zack asked about kim. trini certainly has FELT like... attraction before, of course, but not like this. proper crushes are different, and having one on someone who is rapidly becoming one of your best friends....? YIKES. 
> 
> again, they're young! note the chapter title! still figuring all of this out.
> 
> all that stuff about kim and jason and their relationship was... SIGH. they're slowly getting back to how they were, but it's a process. all of it's out between them now though, with all five of the kids knowing full well what happened. their bond's getting stronger!
> 
> note that all of the kids' language gets more relaxed when they drink, too. so zack using stuff like 'was' instead of 'were', jason's more scottish thrum, etc is very intentional.
> 
> that look that kim gives trini... the one that 'she can't place'? it's kim being like, touched by the gesture. the fact that trini remembers her drink order. yaknow.
> 
> \---
> 
> shorter a/n this week cause... life! u kno! and I know not a whole lot HAPPENED this chapter, but these bonding bits are super important for showing the development between the kids. (bonus: I thought the fluff might be nice too, given the present state of the world, yaknow)
> 
> next time on glee: more animagus research, some normal interactions, and some class stuff where professor vector discusses one of my favourite plays of all time, _Arcadia_ by Tom Stoppard. might seem a bit odd for the artihmancy curriculum, but it'll be explained in-chapter. 
> 
> and I wouldn't usually recommend reading something before a chapter, but I'm gonna! only if you want, of course. you'll be able to go along just fine with the story if you don't! but the play is SUPER short and SUCH A FUCKING AMAZING BIT OF LITERATURE. HOLY CROW! incidentally, it's very much about finding meaning in the everyday, which I figure is quite appropriate for the state of the world presently. you can find it online in pdf form [here](https://theliterat.files.wordpress.com/2016/01/arcadia.pdf).
> 
> and for those of you who subscribe to chinese traditional holidays, I wish you a safe and reflective qingming today. I know it's going to be harder to pay respects than usual for most.
> 
> as always, thanks for reading, all. comments ARE VERY MUCH APPRECIATED! LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THOUGHT! 
> 
> take care of yourselves, and until next time!


	50. Crash Into Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/1HL3yEnYq8LEyFQ3QegA5V?si=MpMhu8f8SuG40jSV1beGsg). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

"'...and with the light of the full moon as my only witness, her rays permitting this foray into the unknown, I began my ritualistic meditation,'" Billy reads, voice quiet as he holds his lit wand above a small, leather bound book. It looks ancient; seemingly some kind of diary or memoir and entirely hand-written. So far, it's the only firsthand account of the Animagus transformation that they've found. 

The library is empty around them, notably silent save for the tiny _creaks_ sounding here and there through the dark, the smooth hardwood floors chattering away under the weight of the tens of thousands of books housed in the great shelves that tower above. The light of the moon streaks through wispy cloud cover outside and comes in through the ancient windows, lending a kind of peace to everything, spinning around the strange sense of humming gentle tension that's fallen over them all as they listen to Billy read.

It feels much like a campfire story to Trini; certainly a bit unsettling, hearing the Animagus magic described firsthand, but she and the others are hanging off of his every word.

Billy flips a few pages, eyes narrowed as he comes to the spot where he stopped a minute ago, marked with a scrap piece of parchment. "That bit _has_ to be the beginning of the Animagus business, because he repeatedly mentions the tedium of having to continue with the so-called ritual while travelling." He pauses, tilting his head. "And there are multiple places where he discusses— Oh!"

He claps his hands together a couple times, keeping very quiet on account of where they are. Trini quirks an eyebrow, smiling at his reaction. The other three are regarding him in the same way, with warm fondness in their eyes.

"Wow, listen to this," Billy whispers, putting his index finger on the page. "'Having prepared my offerings in advance, I became impatient with the heavens; the arrival of the new moon did not bring vigour to my mortal soul, as it does to all men, for there was no promise of beginning in my circumstance. I could do naught but wait to be blessed with its fullness once more.'"

Trini, Zack, Kim, and Jason watch as his reactions rise and fall across his face.

Billy stops reading and looks up at them, still talking in a hushed voice, "So he starts the ritual with the full moon and has to wait for another to proceed, it seems."

Trini hums, running her hand through her hair and tussling it a bit. "And in the meantime, there's something he has to do as a kind of... maintenance of it?"

"That's what it sounds like," Jason says, nodding. "Er, did the word 'offerings' freak anyone else out?"

"Could just be referring to the potion ingredients, no?" Trini mutters.

There's a brief silence as Zack nods thoughtfully, all of them considering.

Billy's eyes are back to flitting over the handwritten pages. "He talks extensively about his physical journey, given he was travelling most of the time... and there's a lot here about having trouble eating and drinking, but I can't figure why that would be—"

"Was the process making him ill, you reckon?" Zack asks, chin resting on his hand and eyeing Billy curiously.

Billy hesitates. "I can't be sure. But he talks about it as if it's more of an... annoyance than a worry? I'd have to wonder if there's a particular set of dietary restrictions involved."

Kim frowns. "Like no meat for the extent of this whole shindig? That kind of deal?"

"Worried about bacon, are you?" Trini quips, smirking at her.

"Maybe," Kim mutters, huffing a bit through a smile. She jerks her head at Billy. "Did he say anything else?"

Billy hums under his breath, reading out, "'I presented my offerings to the full moon, myself at once dwarfed by the heavenly bodies of the cosmos; the sky cloudless as the gods smiled down upon me. A sign, thought I, of the blessing to come...'"

"Then there's more about tedium, and using that word specifically," he continues, frowning. "He debates with himself about whether the first part was worse than the current, which is solid evidence for multiple steps in the process."

Sighing lightly, Billy pauses. "In a way, I'm quite glad for him complaining. Easier for us to get an idea of what's involved, though I understand this is mostly hearsay..."

"Are you joking?" Zack says, shaking his head. "This is the most in-depth information on the process we've found. Good going."

Everyone else makes noises of agreement and Billy smiles at Zack before looking back down at the book, massaging the back of his neck to get the tension out. They're all silent for a couple minutes as he reads quickly, making displeased noises under his breath as he flips page after page.

Trini looks up to find Kim's soft eyes on her across their little circle. When she raises her eyebrow playfully, Kim seems to snap out of it, blinking rapidly and mouthing, "Sorry" while passing a hand in front of her face to indicate she spaced out.

And it makes sense, given it's approaching midnight. They've been in here since ten o'clock, wanting to stagger the times they arrive for fear of being too predictable. Coming right after the library closes at eight would be ideal, but it can't happen consistently.

In reply Trini just gives Kim a small smile to say it's fine, turning back to Billy, whose noises have gone from displeased to curious within the last couple pages.

.

Professor Vector is writing on the giant blackboard the next morning, well into their first lesson on Tom Stoppard's _Arcadia_ , the chalk making a distinctive _taptaptap_ sound as she goes.

Kim yawns behind her hand then rests it on her open copy of the play as she writes away.

"...when we speak of Chaos Theory in the context of this play, predictability becomes a function of the dichotomy between chaos and order," Professor Vector says. With a sharp movement of her hand, she underlines a heading labelled 'Entropy' and turns around to face the class. "We will be using simplified definitions throughout this unit, given these concepts are usually reserved for the upper-year curriculum. So, for the purposes of our discussions over the next few weeks, we can broadly define entropy as the degree of disorder within a system."

"Now — how can we relate the concept of entropy to the lecture room's cluttered table?" she asks, gesturing with her tattered copy of the play held in one hand. "And why is that important for us, as magic-users who are reading a text intended for a muggle audience?"

There's contemplative silence from the class in return, most people watching with creases in their brows or frowns on their faces.

Professor Vector peers around for a few moments then waves her hand vaguely, beginning to pace back and forth in front of the blackboard. "Think of it this way — if you were to not have seen or read this play—" she glares pointedly at some people who look particularly lost, "and were to simply walk onto the stage at the end, spotting the cluttered table, would that particular visual strike you as something high or low in entropy?"

Kim doodles an arrow pointing upwards in the margins of her notebook, not usually one to answer questions in class unless directly called upon. It's a habit she's only formed in the last couple years, in effort to keep her head down and not draw attention to herself.

At seeing nobody about to give an answer though, Trini shifts a bit from her place in the seat directly in front of Kim, giving a thumbs up and slowly raising it into the air so Vector can see.

Professor Vector jerks her head in Trini's direction. "To the point as always, Miss Gomez. But correct all the same — five points to Hufflepuff." She twitches her wand and the chalk flies out of her hand, beginning to write on the blackboard of its own accord as she narrates along, "Entropy would be high in that instance, because of the apparent chaotic nature of the clutter."

She pauses, eyes sweeping over the classroom then fixing back on Trini. "Would you care to answer the initial questions as well?"

Trini leans back a bit in her seat by way of an answer and Professor Vector clicks her tongue. With a lazy wave of her wand, she flicks it upwards, and an ostentatious yellow blinking neon sign bearing the number 20 appears above her head.

Vector purses her lips then waggles her fingers at the sign drily. "Perhaps I can entice you with a carrot, as a jockey would a horse. I will award you _twenty_ points if you answer correctly."

Kim grins, and Trini barely hesitates before answering, taking a deep breath in and out.

"You can apply entropy to the stuff on the table because..." Trini begins slowly, tone even. "If you've seen or read the play, you've watched every bit of rubbish placed there throughout? You know it has order, you know the purpose of each object, so entropy is low. Coming onto the stage without having witnessed any of that, though, you don't know the 'why' of any of it, you don't know the reasoning — it just looks like a mess. Entropy is high in that case. So it's both at the same time, depending on perspective. Order and chaos."

"A paradox, exactly," Professor Vector says, urging her to continue.

Trini tilts her head a little. "That table is a representation of the whole play, right? And it's important for us because that's how magic seems to muggles all of the time — it's high entropy no matter what. The complexities can't be explained because they don't have the requisite information."

Hermione's hand goes up from the front of the class, and Professor Vector hums in acknowledgement. "Very good. Take your twenty points. Yes, Miss Granger?"

Chip pats Trini on the shoulder as Hermione hesitates. "Professor, I'm curious — what prompted you to put this in the curriculum? I didn't see it on past Arithmancy syllabi."

Professor Vector hums. "This is indeed the first time I'm covering a play in this class. And this text is only a year or so old, mind. I realise it's a bit of an unconventional choice, but the themes present are very relevant to us."

After a short pause Vector waves her wand at the blackboard, and another line of text begins to appear there. "Its relevance can be summarised in this question: why even try to infer the future if we can never be sure of our predictions?"

She walks over to her desk and picks up a heavy cereal bowl with a spoon poking out of the top, waving her wand to levitate it in the air in front of her. With another flick of her wrist it begins to enlarge, growing to around six feet in diameter.

It tilts a bit so the class can get a better view of the contents: steaming-hot rice pudding with a large dollop of bright red jam on top. Kim nods to herself, remembering the visual from the first bit of the play.

"If you've done your reading, you know what this is," Professor Vector says, keeping it levitating in the air and waving her wand again. The chalk at the blackboard continues writing there by magic, and the heading 'Entropy + Time' appears underneath the previous line.

"We've previously discussed Newtonian mechanics and Determinism in the context of magical prophesying via numbers. Up until now, we've demonstrated the value in using data to infer the future." She pauses, regarding the class in silence for a few moments. "But over the next few weeks we will go further, delving into and highlighting the _limits_ of Arithmancy magic."

Kim continues to write in her notebook, hand flying across the page.

"For one, time does not go backward," Vector says. "It continues forward, albeit at different rates, depending on gravitational forces or physical location in the universe. We can effectively move along the timeline via Time Magic, but it _never_ flows backwards. Magicks and enchantments can be used to slow the progression, even pause it. But eventually, it will continue regardless of what we do, fleeing before us."

Professor Vector turns and waves her hand at the levitating bowl. "In the play, Thomasina makes the point I'm illustrating here. If we stir the jam into the pudding, you cannot un-stir it. Things cannot be stirred apart."

"Now, by the concept of Newtonian mechanics, we are able to infer and roughly predict outcomes. Using mathematical formulas, we can establish initial system conditions and further infer events based on physical concepts like force, gravity, and the like. This is not unique to us as magic-users — modern day muggles have these capabilities as well."

"If I do this—" Vector flicks her wand and the giant spoon begins to stir, swirling the contents around, "the jam blends. By measuring how quickly we stir, the force acting on the bowl and its contents, the mass of both the jam and the pudding... and so on, we can roughly predict how quickly the jam will blend in, eventually turning the pudding pink."

"But—I say again—we cannot go back," she repeats, looking around at everyone pointedly. "And you will notice something. What's happening to the steam?"

Billy's hand goes up, and Vector hums at him. "Rate of evaporation is slowing," he says, tilting his head. "The pudding's cooling down."

"In other words, we are seeing the Second Law of Thermodynamics in effect," Professor Vector says, nodding. "Five points to Ravenclaw." She gestures to a diagram appearing on the blackboard. "Heat goes to cold. Everything cools."

"Meanwhile, as we stir, our deterministic predictions depart the chartered paths at every corner. Chaos rears its head, whether due to a choice we make—where perhaps we add an anti-clockwise stir, perhaps we go faster one moment and slower the next, perhaps we remove the spoon and start from a different part of the bowl—or due to the universe itself acting on it..."

Vector waves her wand and a series of semi-transparent images begin to appear at the front of the classroom, like ghostly blueish projections: a bird flies through a window and lands happily in the pudding, a faceless person knocks the bowl over and shatters it on the floor, spontaneous rain begins to fall above and gathers atop the contents.

Kim watches, interested, and chuckles a bit along with the rest of the class when a final image of a group of clowns bursts into the classroom through the door, marching up the aisle before beginning to toss the bowl between them.

The images disappear then, leaving the actual bowl floating there, untouched. "It is an inevitability that order goes into disorder then back again," Vector continues, flicking her wand to start the chalk on the blackboard drawing another diagram; it's simple, two arrows in a circular curve, one ending where the other begins. "Order gives way to unpredictability, and vice versa. It is a continuous push and pull."

Vector pauses, peering at the bowl for a moment before waving her wand to shrink it all back down to normal size. "I've never quite fancied rice pudding. Any takers?"

Zack's hand shoots up immediately and Vector sends it sailing over to him. "Thank you for giving us an example of predictability in action, Mister Taylor."

He grins back at her, plunging the spoon in and cramming it in his mouth. "Happy to assist, Professor."

"I strive to provide all types of enrichment in my lessons," Vector mutters, then resumes teaching. "Now, I ask again — how might all of this apply to us, as Arithmancers?"

Hermione raises her hand and Professor Vector hums.

"It means that we can't ever completely predict the future, even using numbers," Hermione says slowly. "We can get close, but the system will always move towards high entropy—disorder—regardless of the data we have."

Professor Vector inclines her head, as if prompting her to continue, and Hermione hesitates before lighting up. "Oh, wait — that isn't entirely right. The entropy of the system never decreases over time, but that doesn't necessarily mean it increases either...?"

"There you are. Five points to Gryffindor," Professor Vector says, giving a small nod. "Entropy never decreases over time, but it only stays constant within an isolated system if all processes are reversible."

Vector waves her hand vaguely. "Again, grasping these definitions is something that will only be required of you in the upper-years, so please don't worry too much about them for the moment. We just need a basic understanding for this unit." She pauses, gesturing to the arrow diagram. "So we know that in a general sense, things move towards disorder, inevitably. Point A to point B can be inferred, but the in-between is much more difficult."

Kim's brow furrows as she listens. Billy has the same look on his face from his place beside her.

"And yet, could we not use numbers to theoretically plot every shape of the universe?" Vector gestures to another spot on the blackboard, where the chalk is writing out another quote from the play: '. _..if there is an equation for a curve like a bell, there must be an equation for one like a bluebell, and if a bluebell, why not a rose? Do we believe nature is written in numbers?_ '

Professor Vector looks around at the class. "Nature is indeed written in numbers. But it is not so cut and dry — the symphony has errant notes. What we must strive to do, as Arithmancers, is plot out the _tune_ ," she says evenly. "As Valentine says in the play, 'the unpredictable and the predetermined unfold together to make everything the way it is'. It is all a dance. The beginning and end are within our sightlines, but the process that will bring us from one to the other—occupying the space between—is _disorder_."

"Now — when Valentine and Hannah are discussing why Thomasina's method of iteration had not been applied before, Valentine suggests that it was for lack of time. To do the kind of meticulous calculations Thomasina was doing by hand, absent magic, one would need endless parchment, endless ink, endless time and effort in which to do so."

She waves her wand and a rough drawing of a man begins to appear on the blackboard. "This brings us to the theme of madness, which is touched on many times in the play. Septimus, the archetypical scholar, the tutor, the mentor, is revealed to be the legendary hermit of the estate. He purportedly goes mad after Thomasina dies, spending the rest of his life obsessively trying to complete her mathematical equations and algorithms."

Professor Vector gets quieter. "And even still, all of his calculations are lost to time. We learn that they were set aflame, assumed to be the meaningless ravings of a madman." She pauses, humming. "By Valentine's words, one would have to be insane to try and plot every mathematical object in the universe, would they not? To attempt such a thing, you would have to spend your _life_ plotting out a future which inevitably breaks off in an infinity of permutations from second to second."

"So I ask again, why do it at all?" Vector urges. "Why try to unravel the mysteries of the universe? As Bernard says — why do we _care_ if the universe is expanding? Why does it matter if it will all be dark and cold in the end? Why did Septimus—our hermit—care to take up this task? Why did he find it valuable?"

Cameron Watanabe puts his hand up, and Professor Vector nods to him.

"Because he was doing it for her," he says tentatively. "To keep her memory alive."

Vector hums, half-turning towards the blackboard and peering at it pensively. "Perhaps, yes. Perhaps he found meaning in trying to continue Thomasina's work after she was ripped from the world so early. Take five points for Slytherin." She looks back at the class, something unreadable on her face.

"But was it _worth_ it?" Vector asks, voice strangely subdued again. "To spend his days in pursuit of scientific progress, putting aside future love, future life, future pain for its sake?"

A Hufflepuff girl speaks up from across the aisle, and Kim looks over with the rest of the class. "Is that..." she starts, then pauses. Tilts her head. "Respectfully Professor, is that what he was doing though?"

Professor Vector points at her triumphantly. "Aha! _Exactly_ , Miss Jones. Five more points for Hufflepuff." She gestures wildly with her copy of the play. "I propose that it is not an either or! Why is it that we must say Septimus was doing one or the other? Could he not have been pursuing logic and love at once? These are not mutually exclusive concepts. This sense of apparent ultimatum is _constructed_ , arising from our very human desire to impose concrete definitions on systems, even if they may vary wildly by their nature."

Vector glances at the clock on the wall and nods to herself. "And this is one of the key messages of this play, which we will explore further over the next few weeks. All of these themes and relationships that appear to contradict: order and chaos, thought and feeling, science and art..." she trails off, gesturing vaguely. "These can exist together, paradoxically."

"I'll wrap up today's class with this — in the last year and a half that you all have been in lessons with me, we have learned that divination magic by numbers is certainly credible," she says, hands linked behind her back as she begins to slowly pace the front of the classroom again. "There is value in Arithmancy as a magical discipline. If there was not, learning it would be pointless. But it is _not_ all there is."

"Why? Because there will always be disorder pushing against us in our efforts. Order and chaos will continue to dance, each emerging out of the other infinitely, until the end of time. We can predict all we want, measure every modicum of data possible. But existence—and magic, further—at its most basic and complex is change. This movement, this friction, this _heat_ will always best us. To quote _Arcadia_ : 'The heat goes into the mix... all the time, irreversibly.'"

"Now—" Vector says, peering curiously at all of them, "a final question before you're dismissed. What is the most powerful of all known magicks?"

One of Billy's roommates, Koda, raises his hand from a few rows in front of them.

"Mister Sudarso."

"It's er... love, Professor."

And it's a mark of the seriousness of the discussion, the sincere awe that's coloured Professor Vector's voice for the last few minutes, that nobody in the class chuckles at Koda's answer. The expected scoffing and rolling of eyes is markedly absent.

Kim draws in a breath.

"Yes. Five points to Ravenclaw. Love, though we understand very little of it as a magical force, is unquestionably the most powerful. And that in itself is a _type_ of change, friction — it is heat exchange. That human action — it will always throw our calculations into disarray, into chaos. Therein lies the beauty of all of this, all. Chaos does not bind us, it _frees_ us."

Professor Vector pauses, looking around at all of them slowly. "So why continue in our attempts to predict? To plan?" She gestures, hand movements firm and controlled, contrasting with the passion shining in her eyes. "Because we _must_. Hannah's answer to Bernard, after he asks why we should try to come up with answers at all, is this: 'It's wanting to know that makes us matter. Otherwise we're going out the way we came in.'"

She pauses again, taking a deep breath in and out. "This is the key. There's nothing more human than the search for meaning, for patterns, for sense. The pursuit of knowledge is but one way to do this."

There's silence for a few moments as Vector's eyes linger on the blackboard, watching the moving chalk drawing of Septimus with a strange look on her face.

"Yes, we may know how the world will end one day," Vector says quietly, turning back to the class. "We know how this story ends. But it's in the unknown spaces between where we find meaning. Through the seemingly chaotic occurrences of everyday life, through love, through choice, we continue to be the action of bodies in heat, a flame flickering in the cosmos, even if it may be considered mad by some to continue to struggle against the inevitable dark and cold of the universe."

"This is science, all. This is _story_. They are one and the same. And perhaps..." she gestures to the blackboard, reading the final quote aloud, "'When we have found all the mysteries and lost all the meaning, we will be alone, on an empty shore.'"

Professor Vector smiles then, a display so rare that it sends a warm tingling down Kim's spine. "Perhaps. But even then?" she gestures back to the blackboard, reading the last line for all of them to hear, "'Then we will dance.'"

.

Later that night, all five of them are back in the Restricted Section for the second time in two days. The progress they've made so far in their research is addictive, all of the pieces slowly slotting together, and it's been hard for Trini to keep herself from pouring all of her energies into this, despite her other schoolwork.

She sips at her thermos of cold coffee, the milk thinly coating her tongue, and clears her throat quietly as Billy talks, still focused on the hand-written account of the Animagus process that he found a few days ago.

"I think this might be indicative of variable time in the last stage, like you suggested," he says slowly, looking up at her with something like quiet victory thrumming through his voice. "He talks about how he waited until the 'hottest months' in effort to curb the time he would have to wait."

"That's... really interesting," Trini mutters, furrowing her brow as she places her thermos on the floor. "What happens more frequently in summer? Eclipses and shit aren't affected by seasons." She pauses. "Where was he at the time?"

Billy shakes his head. "Could be a number of things. And he hasn't mentioned his location yet, though it's likely somewhere in here. I haven't read the whole thing."

"Don't worry," Trini says, still thinking fast. "But the question stands—what's different in the hotter months? What was he trying to control for?"

Billy makes a little awed noise and reaches over to put a gentle hand on Trini's wrist, and blindly, not having looked up from the book. His face splits into a wide smile as he answers, "Blimey. The _weather_."

He taps a page with his finger and begins to read aloud again, "'Soaked was I, for the Heaven-sent storm could not cease on such a wondrous night. Lo, nor would I have willed it if I could! Amidst a sublime event as it was, two hearts beat beneath my ribs while the gods thrust lightning about the sky. The blood that passed my lips did not taste of death, and with my hand upon my breast I feared not. At long last, I felt the beginnings of what I had willed.'" 

There's silence for half a minute as he continues to read ahead in silence, then sighs lightly. "There are no more details on the process, but it's clear that he was describing the night he transformed for the first time, because he talks about how his animal form felt in the next paragraph."

"So, what, he needed a storm to morph?" Zack asks slowly.

"Seems that way," Jason says, tilting his head. "But... Merlin's beard — drinking _blood..._? You reckon that's the 'offering' he mentioned?"

Kim shakes her head quickly. "There's no way this is blood magic. McGonagall's done it, remember. And they teach it to kids our age at Uagadou."

All of them are silent for a few moments as they consider. "B," Trini begins timidly, "does he ever mention the word 'Animagus' in the text?"

Billy blinks at her then looks back down at the book. "I... he describes turning into an animal and what he did while in that form, then morphs back to human at will. All of that is specific. If it was some kind of Lycanthropy ritual—though I've certainly never heard of it happening this way—he wouldn't remember anything about his time as an animal." He pauses, frowning. "Though... it's possible he's embellishing in the parts where he's in animal form?"

Zack drums his fingers on the wood floor softly. "This doesn't seem like that, though."

"No, it doesn't," Trini agrees, looking back to Billy. "I'm not saying this isn't what we think it is. But..." she trails off, considering. "Kim, how would you feel about asking your mum if the Animagus transformation is partly blood magic?"

Kim blinks. "Er, sure? I can lie a bit and say I heard people talking."

"Brill," Trini mutters, giving her a soft smile. Kim returns it.

"And I'll read this all the way through in the meantime," Billy says, leaning back to get more comfortable. "Why don't you lot keep at yours while I do?"

"Sounds good," Zack says, shifting to get better situated as well.

.

Kim receives her mum's reply three days later. Moving her newly-delivered _Daily Prophet_ over, she greets Agni happily and gets an enthusiastic hoot in return, the owl nuzzling into her palm before taking off again.

It's Wednesday which means Jason, Zack, and Trini aren't present at breakfast; the three of them have a free period first thing so it tends to be a sleep-in day, understandably.

She's sat at the Ravenclaw table with Billy across from her, who's watching her slit the letter open over the top of his steaming coffee mug. Kim unfolds it and skims the text quickly, looking for the answer to her question about blood magic and planning to read the whole thing proper once she's back in her dorm later tonight.

When she finds her mum's answer in the post-script her heart does a little skip and leap, causing her to smile as she looks up at Billy. "'No, nothing that vile—'" she reads aloud, seeing Billy's face fall a bit and reaching across the table to keep his attention, "'but I can certainly see how that misconception would arise, given the potion turns blood red when it's finished.'"

Billy's eyebrows shoot up and he jumps to his feet, raising his fists in victory right there in the middle of the Great Hall; _beaming_ at her, wide-eyed.

"Kim!" he exclaims, not too loud, though it wouldn't matter. The school is busy and bustling around them, all engaged in their own lives.

"Think you might've found something," Kim sing-songs, smiling wide back at him.

Billy plops down onto the bench again, clearly giddy, and Kim can feel his leg join hers in bouncing under the table. "Thank you for writing her. Not all of the information we need by any means, but it's quite the start."

Kim nods vigorously, placing the letter safely into her rucksack. "This is _huge_. The whole thing seems to be a bit of a treasure hunt. We'll get there, it's just gonna take time." She pauses, searching his eyes. "Good work."

He waves her off. "Group effort. Though, speaking of—" he frowns lightly, "we aren't going to be able to tell the others about this development until we're all in the library, given today is our Tommy lunch day."

Kim hums, considering. "Well, you want to get Jase and Zack up to speed during your free period? I'll tell Trini in Runes?"

Billy nods. "That's perfect."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'crash into me' by dave matthews band. it's always playing in my head during that final bit in arcadia, on the Last Night. OUCH!
> 
> .
> 
> HELLO HELLO! welcome to more progress! chapter 50 is a big milestone. thank you all again for coming on this ride with me!
> 
> this picks up the night after last chapter, on a sunday evening. the kids are slowly piecing everything together! note all the steps in how the animagus magic works are taken from JKR's writings on the subject, and the quotes from the first-hand account billy found are something I've written for the story.
> 
> so we apparently need a full moon to begin the spell, then some kind of maintenance stuff (where eating and drinking becomes an issue? HMMM!), then another full moon, and then a storm! oho! WE'RE GETTING THERE LADS! outlining steps and specifics!
> 
> trini catches kim staring at her but thinks nothing of it, as she does. but !!! we SEE you kim!
> 
> and we have professor vector's lecture on arcadia, which I hope you enjoyed! a lot of terms getting tossed around, so I hope it wasn't too convoluted to follow. the key, here, is in what vector says about the space between things being where we find meaning. I myself have a tendency to live my life like a lead-up sometimes, always looking to the next thing. can be good to slow down, you know?
> 
> it's a lovely sentiment. and again, I adore the play a lot. hope some of you got to take a look at it! if you're more curious after reading this chapter, I'll give you the link again — you can find it online in pdf form [here](https://theliterat.files.wordpress.com/2016/01/arcadia.pdf). I really thought the play applied beautifully to arithmancy concepts, so I wanted to include it! weaving stuff like that in with a magical education setting is the BEST. we don't get much info in the HP books as to what happens in arithmancy classes (or muggle studies & ancient runes, for that matter) so it's cool to extrapolate with the curriculums.
> 
> note too that normally, I would've cut around half of that lecture part in edits. but given we're all in a bit of a ????? situation, I figured the more I can give you to read the better, I guess? I also really haven't shown you a whole lot in terms of actual lessons at hogwarts yet, so why not...? but yeah. if you didn't already, you can skip over the bulk of it if you wish! it just puts a bunch of the story themes neatly into a package, yaknow.
> 
> onwards! kim asked her mum about the animagus magic! she will write her with a few more questions later, and maddy's eventually gonna catch on to what's going on. she knows her kid enough by now! more to come.
> 
> next time on glee: we pick up with kim on her way out of the castle for a swim. but... she's going out earlier than usual because of all the late night research they've been doing, and stumbles upon quite the scene. it's a direct canon collision, so expect to see our dear filch, snape, and moody. along with one harry potter under his trusty invisibility cloak after taking his golden egg for a bath. more stuff too, including a kim/moody bit, and a cute trimberly interaction feat. trini being Supportive and adorable.
> 
> \---
> 
> thanks for reading, all. hope everything is good with you and you're all staying safe in these times of great Yikes. comments are appreciated if you have the energy, as always. take care <3


	51. Line Of Sight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/2WWfjbHALIb3e7FMcj9mr4?si=Xxk3q1BZSXqeW3khnrWpLA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The following evening finds Kim creeping upward through the castle, beat-up canvas rucksack on her shoulders with her gramophone safely stowed inside. She's intent on getting a swim in early tonight, hoping to tire her body out enough to manage a few extra hours of sleep than usual. The five of them have been staying up quite late over the past couple weeks to do their Animagus research, and she's only managed one swim so far this semester as a result.

Being with a group of people— _friends_ —so often lately has kept her in better spirits; certainly not so quick to snap, less susceptible to the feelings of loneliness that tend to descend over her mind once the rest of the school is asleep. But she needs these outings, the long quiet walks around the lake, the sensation of the frigid water holding her up as she takes some time to breathe.

Tapping her fingers on her thigh, Kim emerges out of a staircase onto the second floor of the castle, making an extra effort to pick up the heavy rubber soles of her black Docs as she pads quietly into the corridor. It's nearly one in the morning, the light of the moon bright and streaking in diagonal slants across the stone floors, beckoning her out into the grounds.

Kim smiles softly in answer, body buzzing with happy anticipation.

And there's potential for Filch to still be on his patrols at this hour, so she's elected to traverse the castle under her trusty Disillusionment Charm, taking a route up from the dungeons that's a bit longer than usual.

But she doesn't mind; the emptiness of the ancient corridors is calming, rendering her content to have nothing but the low flickering light of the torches for company. At least until she can be out with the moon once more.

She walks along the corridor, shoulder brushing against the wall as the Charm produces a chameleon-like effect that causes her entire body and clothing to take on the appearance of her surroundings. It was rudimentary the first time she managed to cast it, like a rough approximation palette of colours taken from the things around her. But over the years, using it as often as she does, she's become quite proud of her proficiency.

It's not full invisibility, by any means, but it's the next best thing.

An errant thought flickers through Kim's mind then — of showing it Trini one day, picturing her stubbornly trying to hide an impressed smile.

Smiling to herself, she peers around a corner into an adjacent corridor. It's empty, to no surprise, and she soon spots her target passage—the same one she'd taken Trini down in their escape from Filch a couple weeks ago. It's hidden behind a large tapestry and will take her up two floors.

Reaching it, Kim takes another quick glance around and pulls the tapestry back just enough to slink inside. And as she steps into the near pitch-dark of the passage, a couple things seem to happen at once:

A low grunt reaches her ears from somewhere up the narrow staircase, followed by the frantic sounds of someone scrambling—

Then a booming _CRASH_ , like solid metal hitting stone once, then again, then again, coming her way—

Freezing in place, Kim presses her back up against the wall, left foot wedged against the side of the first stair, wishing with all her might that she possessed the ability to pass through stone—

_Fucking Peeves._

She grits her teeth as the _CRASH, CRASH, CRASH_ continues in rapid staccato, like bottle rockets going off right next to her in succession—

Eyes quickly adjusting to the dark, Kim just barely registers a solid heavy object go tumbling across her field of vision. It shoots out of the tapestry she just came through, and in the space of a stuttered heartbeat begins to _wail_ in a high-pitched, eerie shriek that causes goosebumps to go running across her whole body, the sound echoing off the walls of the corridor in a shrill racket that will no doubt wake the entire castle in short order.

_Merlin's beard._

Breathing heavily through her nose, Kim does some very quick thinking.

There's clearly someone on the stairs above her. It's pitch dark, sure, but she can't risk going up that way and passing them—

Nor can she go back out into the corridor; not with the ear-splitting, almost ethereal shriek beckoning everyone with decent hearing in a hundred mile radius—

Her Disillusionment Charm won't be as effective by the light of the torches, either—

Kim shakes her head a bit, trying to shrug off the noise as it continues to cut through her mind like a siren song, unlike anything she's ever heard—

"PEEVES!"

_Fuck._

Clenching her jaw, Kim stays there in the dark, back pressed firmly up against the wall. Her heartbeat is racketing against her ribcage, the deep bass of it filling her ears, thickening in her throat, sending her stomach churning—

"What's this racket?" Filch says slowly, voice getting clearer as he nears. "Wake up the whole castle, will you? I'll have you, Peeves, I'll have you, you'll... and what is this?"

The wailing stops and there's a brief pause, Filch's heavy breathing reaching her ears through the tapestry, followed by a soft _meow_ from Mrs. Norris.

"Egg? My sweet! This is a Triwizard clue! This belongs to a school champion!" Filch exclaims, a note of triumph spinning into his voice. "PEEVES! You've been stealing!"

_No, no, no—_

Kim twitches to the side in a spastic kind of fit, body no doubt processing faster than her mind, intent on trying her chances at going up and passing by whoever's on the staircase—

But the tapestry next to her is ripped aside, and all at once Filch is standing there with the heavy golden egg in his hands, five feet from the toe of her boot, looking straight past her and upwards into the dark of the passage.

"Hiding, are you?" Filch mutters, beady eyes narrowing, torchlight dancing on his wrinkled face. "I'm coming to get you, Peeves... you've gone and stolen a Triwizard clue, Peeves... Dumbledore'll have you out of here for this, you filthy pilfering poltergeist..."

Kim's not sure when she last took a breath.

He steps into the passage with his cat twining around his ankles, her tail brushing against the bottom of his old flannel dressing gown. They pass not a foot from Kim in the dark, and Filch begins to climb the stairs.

Mrs. Norris' eyes roam over her and Kim clenches her jaw.

But she dares not turn her head, following Filch with her eyes instead. And her gaze falls on a page of parchment that she didn't notice before, resting just below where she knows the trick step to be midway up the staircase.

He's going to find the other person up there—

"Filch? What's going on?"

Kim resists the powerful urge to swear loudly as a clearly _livid_ Professor Snape appears next to her in his slimy grey nightshirt, holding the tapestry aside and staring up the staircase with calculating eyes.

"It's Peeves, Professor," Filch explains. "He threw this egg down the stairs."

Snape stalks into the passage proper, climbing up the stairs to stand next to Filch.

"Peeves?" Snape mutters, eyes fixed on the golden egg. "But Peeves couldn't get into my office..."

Kim's eyes widen.

Gods, is she going to be blamed for stealing a Triwizard clue _and_ breaking into a Professor's office?

"This egg was in your office, Professor?"

"Of course not," Snape spits. "I heard banging and wailing—"

"Yes, Professor, that was the egg—"

"I was coming to investigate—"

"Peeves threw it, Professor—"

"...and when I passed my office, I saw that the torches were lit and a cupboard door was ajar! Somebody has been searching it!"

"But Peeves couldn't—"

"I know he couldn't, Filch! I seal my office with a spell none but a wizard could break!"

They continue to go back and forth for a few moments, and Kim's about to slip back into the corridor when—

_Clunk, clunk, clunk._

You've GOT to be bloody joking—

Kim clenches her jaw so hard that a sharp pang of pain runs through it, trying to keep her head.

"Pyjama party, is it?"

And part of her wants to fucking laugh, because apparently everyone is out tonight.

Kim's eyes flit to Professor Moody then, leaning on his staff with his worn travelling cloak pulled over his nightshirt.

With the light of a nearby torch flickering in his blue eye, his gaze meets hers. It's just for a moment, but long enough to be deliberate.

Moody breathes out a short, unimpressed growl.

_Shit. Shit shit shit._

But he doesn't acknowledge Kim further, charming the tapestry to stay slightly open as he takes a couple steps towards the foot of the staircase, where he begins to bicker back and forth with Snape in rapid-fire.

And Kim leans a bit to the side, ready to take off. Professor Moody is one thing, but if Snape catches her, it's game over. She fixes her eyes on Moody's face, looking for some kind of assurance that she's free to go.

"'Course Dumbledore trusts you," Moody's saying, voice dangerous as he glares up at Snape. "He's a trusting man, isn't he? Believes in second chances. But me — I say there are spots that don't come off, Snape." He pauses. "Spots that _never_ come off, d'you know what I mean?"

Snape seizes his left forearm as if in a convulsion, right where Kim knows his Dark Mark to be. Her eyes widen at the implication.

Is Moody really calling him out? Right here, with two _students_ as witnesses?

Unwilling to wait any longer, Kim takes a single silent step towards the tapestry, staying just out of reach of the torchlight—

But Professor Moody immediately twitches his hand in her direction, discreet enough that the intention would be unreadable by anyone else. Clearly saying:

' _Stay there_.'

Kim tips her head back in frustration as the two Professors continue to argue back and forth, talking about Dumbledore and Potter and student _safety_ , getting more and more heated until, finally, a charged silence falls between them.

They stare at each other, the small bit torchlight coming through the still-open tapestry and dancing on the side of Moody's scarred face.

"I think I will go back to bed," Snape says then, voice clipped.

And within an instant Professor Moody casually steps closer to the staircase—one, two, three paces until he's leaning up against the side of the passage, his back brushing Kim's shoulder; blocking her from the still-livid Snape and a muttering Filch as they soon pass by.

Keeping them from possibly running right into her, she realises.

Kim holds her breath.

Once Snape and Filch have gone, their steps sounding faintly in the corridor outside, Moody steps away from the wall and weighs the golden egg in his hand.

He glances at Kim in his peripherals, giving her a _very_ stern look before speaking again, "Close shave, Potter."

Kim's eyebrows shoot up.

So it _is_ Potter up there. Snape was right.

Professor Moody ambles up the staircase then, his staff making its typical _clunk, clunk, clunk_ noise as he does, and pulls the still-invisible Potter out of the trick step halfway up with a grunt.

Well, that explains it.

Kim stands there as they chat, still frozen until Professor Moody begins climbing the remainder of the staircase, talking to Potter in a low voice and staring with interest at the worn page of parchment that was laying on the ground earlier.

As they make their way out into the corridor above, Moody beckons to Kim behind his back, urging her to not go in Snape and Filch's direction.

To be sure, he's right—with Snape intending to search for the person who robbed his office, Kim can't risk going back down to the common room just yet.

She wanted to swim, anyway. Might as well.

So she finally moves, body still stiff and coiled but slowly relaxing as she climbs the staircase without a sound, carefully stepping over the trick stair where Potter was caught.

Kim pokes her head out into the corridor, finding them already gone, eyes sweeping about and catching on a familiar tall woman staring at her from a painting across the way.

They've interacted before — not in an official capacity, but she's given Kim a nod here and there through the years as she passed in the dead of night. She's wearing her usual: a set of heavy magnificent green robes embroidered with symbols that look vaguely Celtic and a regal golden adornment atop her head. Her hand is absent the usual mead tankard, though; instead, her fingers are curled around a beautiful glinting dagger.

For her own internal purposes, Kim's dubbed her Hot Irish Battle Lady.

Kim meets her eyes in silence and gets a reassuring nod in return, urging her to come out into the corridor proper. And Kim peers around for a moment before she does, back against the wall beside the tapestry, now on the fourth floor of the castle. Takes a deep, settling breath in and out.

The woman gives her a small tight smile, pulling her flowing robes back a little to stow the dagger in an ornate sheath at her hip. Kim quirks an eyebrow and she just shrugs, putting a finger to her lips and jerking her head to get Kim to follow, well knowing her intended destination by now.

Kim nods as the woman begins walking from painting to painting along the wall beside her: striding through lush natural settings and ancient cityscapes, crossing the deck of a ship in a fierce storm, and tip-toeing through what looks to be the active belly of a volcano in the process.

They go up one floor, Kim emerging into the corridor to find the woman climbing up a painted ladder, pulling herself into a depiction of a roof somewhere in Victorian London before stepping around a smoking chimney and continuing.

When Kim turns into Gregory's corridor she exhales a quiet breath, eyes still flitting around for any signs of movement. 

Gregory looks up, Disillusionment Charm or not, and gives her a soft smile. His eyes are drawn to the woman walking along the wall beside Kim, and he tilts his head curiously.

"Kim," he greets quietly, then bows his head to Hot Irish Battle Lady, who's come to a stop in a painting that depicts a group of gruff-looking wizards in the middle of a poker game, puffing at tobacco pipes. "And Your Majesty. A pleasure, as always."

"Same to you, _Leonchroí,_ " the woman returns smoothly, words leaving her lips in a thick Irish accent, huffing a bit and waving her hand around to try and part the blueish smoke that's hanging around her head. And Kim's never heard her speak before; her voice is low but regal, somehow.

"What was that ruckus?" Gregory asks, looking between them. "Kim, are you alright?"

Kim nods, sighing heavily. "Surprisingly, I wasn't the cause."

The woman smiles softly at her. "Close call, sweetheart." She looks to Gregory with an unreadable expression on her face. "A break-in at Professor Snape's, it seems. The Council will meet tomorrow."

Kim watches them curiously as Gregory nods once, though he looks confused. "Surely students, no? Is there really—"

"There's a chance it was external," the woman interjects softly. "Though I cannot verify the claim." Gregory's stone eyebrows shoot up, and he falls silent.

After a few moments he nods slowly. "Certainly, then," he says, though he looks troubled. "That is..." he trails off, sighing. "No doubt Gunhilda will push for more stringent measures."

"As she would be right to," the woman says, voice grave.

"Yes, of course. I will see you then, Maeve."

Entirely confused, Kim just watches them in silence until Hot Irish Battle Lady—or Maeve, apparently—adjusts her robes and gives both her and Gregory a nod. "You be careful now, love," she says, meeting Kim's eyes.

Kim blushes a bit despite herself, and with that Maeve walks away, glaring at one of the men at the poker table as she exits their painting.

"Maeve like... _Queen_ Maeve?" Kim breathes, eyes fixed on her as she goes.

Gregory chuckles. "Indeed. Your reaction to her beauty is quite typical, from my understanding. Though she's known to knock the greatest of fighters on their behinds in the space of a breath."

Kim nods slowly, head turned and still focused on Maeve when Gregory shifts in her peripherals, abruptly thrusting a stone hand out a few feet from the side of her head.

She flinches, startled, but he puts a finger to his lips. Turning his clenched fist upward, he opens it to reveal a crumpled parchment airplane and holds it out.

Kim points to herself in question and Gregory nods. She takes it, and when she recognises the scrawled handwriting, her stomach sinks.

"'Seems everyone was out for a stroll tonight, Hart,'" she reads out quietly, with Gregory peering over her shoulder. "'Come to my office tomorrow at lunch.'"

It's signed with Professor Moody's name, and Kim exhales loudly. "Shit," she mutters, shaking her head.

.

Kim makes her way up to Professor Moody's office the next day as directed, surprised to find Trini sat cross-legged waiting outside the Defense classroom. She has what looks like a small animal cupped in her hands, smiling as it crawls up her wrist.

"Hey," Kim says softly, as Trini meets her eyes. "What's...?"

In lieu of a greeting Trini holds her hand up for Kim to get a better look: it's a tiny silver-blue _dragon_. "Meet Sweetie. She's a Swedish Short Snout."

Kim's eyebrows shoot up, confused for a moment before it dawns on her. "That's the same dragon Diggory faced in the First Task, right?" She squats a bit, adjusting her rucksack on one shoulder as she peers at it, drumming her fingers on her knee.

Trini nods. "They each got one of these little guys when they drew lots. She's just a toy, not actually alive, but Ced's taken to carrying her around. Has more personality than I'd expect with a miniature like this."

"Must be special for the Tournament? Wonder who did the Charm," Kim muses, regarding it curiously. As if in reply, Trini takes a scrap bit of parchment out of the pocket of her robes, holding it out in front of the tiny dragon.

"Watch this."

Sweetie stares the parchment for a moment then opens her mouth, letting out a tiny burst of brilliant blue flame. The parchment catches fire, and Trini blows on it to put it out before it can burn her fingers.

Kim blinks a few times, surprised, and Sweetie gives a little satisfied bob of her head. Clearly happy with herself.

"That's quite the toy," Kim mutters, smiling, though her interest is certainly piqued. "Definite personality..." She pauses, considering. "Reckon the enchantment's closer to Transfiguration magic, actually."

Trini gives her a pleased smile back. Reaching up, she carefully places Sweetie on her shoulder, who curls up as if to take a nap. "Figured you might. Wanted to show you."

Kim feels a warm flutter in her chest. "Thanks, Trin."

And Trini's face changes then, something like concern flickering in her eyes as she watches Kim glance at the classroom door. "You good?"

"Yeah," Kim answers, exhaling a heavy breath. "Shouldn't be long. You sure you don't wanna meet me down there...?"

Trini shakes her head. "It's no problem. Take your time."

The door to the classroom opens and Professor Moody pokes his head out, jerking his head. "Hart. Inside."

Kim nods and mutters, "Professor," as she flashes Trini a grimace.

Trini smiles reassuringly and Kim follows Moody through the door, gripping at her robes with one hand to keep her nervous energy directed somewhere.

Moody walks through the classroom and towards his office at the back. When Kim follows him inside, eyes flitting over the multitude of Secrecy Sensors, Sneakoscopes, and diagrams of magical creatures, he shuts the door with a soft _snap_ and gestures to one of the two lumpy chairs in front of his desk.

"Sit."

Kim does, looking straight ahead as Moody takes his place behind his desk and sits as well. He watches her for a few moments with a pensive look on his gnarled face. "So? Care to explain why we ran into each other last night?"

Having thought about this extensively throughout the day, Kim answers in a tone she hopes doesn't sound too rehearsed, "I was meeting up with someone."

He gives her a slight raise of his eyebrows, though his expression remains otherwise unreadable. "Out in the grounds? In the middle of winter?"

Kim balks. "Er, sorry?"

Moody leans forwards a bit. "You left the castle. You're telling me that your lovers tryst happened outside in the cold?"

"I didn't leave—"

"Hart," he interjects, voice firm, "I _know_ you did." And he sighs then, looking a touch kinder all at once. "Listen, I didn't call you here to get you in trouble. Just want to know that you're alright."

Kim's certain she's failing to mask her surprise, now. "I'm... yeah? I'm fine. I just like to walk around."

Moody watches her with a calculating look in his eyes. "But why lie about it? Surely you'd be in more trouble for running around with another student than mulling about after curfew."

Kim sighs, deciding to drop the pretense. "I just— it's something I really need, I guess? I didn't want you to forbid it."

And to her continued surprise, Moody chuckles lowly. "Figure you and I both know that you'd do whatever you wanted, regardless if I was to ban you or not."

She doesn't know what to say to that, so she remains silent, still gripping at her robes.

"I'm trying to make sure you're being safe," he adds softly. "All kinds of things lurk out in the grounds. I'm well aware you can take care of yourself, but you're still a young girl out at night, alone."

"I—" Kim starts, then stops. "Thanks?"

"Don't mean to overstep," Moody says. "But things happen, and if you're intent on continuing with this, all I'm asking is that you be careful."

Kim just nods, still flabbergasted at his candor.

"And I figure you not revealing yourself to Potter means that you weren't looking to converse with him, but you'd do well to stay away from him too," Moody says quietly, something different in his voice. "That boy's a magnet for trouble."

"Sir. I only know him through Quidditch, really."

"Best keep it that way."

Kim stares at him, now unsure of whether to be offended at his prodding or not.

Moody seems to pick up on it. "I'm not trying to meddle in your personal life. Do what you will. Just be smart, hear me?"

"Yes sir."

"Good. Thank you for listening. You can go, then."

But Kim stays where she is, still regarding him curiously. "Professor... I mean this respectfully, but why do you care?"

And he seems to hesitate. "I'm not trying to weird you out, kid. I just... I knew your family back in the day."

Kim's eyes widen, her previous suspicion confirmed. "My father?"

Moody nods, bringing his trademark flask out of his robes and taking a long sip from it. "From what those other kids were saying last month, I gather you and him aren't on the best of terms anymore. I understand your parents separated too, and I'm sorry for that."

He pauses again, and it's clear that he's carefully considering his words. "But there are... the world is changing around us. You're a good kid. Please just keep your head down, eh? Don't go looking for trouble. I'd hate for you to get caught up in it all."

And Kim isn't sure if he's referring to what her dad has talked about in his letters or not, but she gets to her feet. "I'll be careful. Always am. Kind of have learned to be."

"Figured as much."

Kim gives him a little nod, beginning to back out of the office with his words swirling around in her mind. "I— thank you. I don't mean to be ungrateful, and I appreciate you looking out for me. Truly."

He inclines his head. "Just want what's best. I owe your old dad that much."

Kim gives him a small smile and opens the door. "Thanks, sir."

"'Course. Get going, now."

.

Kim exits the Defense classroom and finds Jason waiting there with Trini, both sat up against the wall of the corridor and chatting, Sweetie still napping on Trini's shoulder.

They get to their feet and give her soft smiles, silently asking how it went.

"You didn't have to come," Kim mutters, looking at Jason. Though her heart has warmed considerably at seeing them both.

He waves her off. "Happy to. All good?"

Kim nods as they begin to walk towards the Grand Staircase. "Yeah. I wasn't... in trouble?"

Trini frowns as Jason pulls a similar expression.

"What did he want then?" Jason asks.

"He..." Kim starts slowly, wondering the same thing herself. "It just seemed like he wanted to make sure I wasn't doing anything dangerous. And he knew somehow that I'd left the castle, but I'm certain I wasn't followed...?"

Jason cocks his head to the side, brow twitching.

Trini's frown deepens. "That's strange. I mean, I know the castle can communicate with the staff, to a degree? Through the paintings and the House-elves mainly. Maybe he had you tailed that way?"

"Maybe," Kim mutters, then sighs as they turn a corner. "He didn't seem like, creepy about it or anything. Just concerned." She looks to Jason and meets his eyes warily. "You know how I was wondering before if he knew my dad?"

Jason nods and his face darkens. "He does, then?"

"Yeah, before. Told me as much." Kim pauses, considering. "Though it can't've been _that_ well," she lowers her voice, "like, an Auror and a Death Eater being good mates in the height of the war? That seems far-fetched."

"Unless Moody didn't know that particular bit, right," Jason says slowly, nodding. "In either case, guess it can't hurt to have a teacher in your corner. Glad he didn't get you in trouble. First time you've been caught, no?"

Kim hums. "It's my fault. With us staying up so late recently, I figured going out a bit earlier than usual'd make sense. Won't be doing that again."

Jason makes a noise of disagreement. "Reckon you still can, K. Better you get as much sleep as possible, and all that was a fluke. He won't be out patrolling every night."

They make their way downstairs to the Great Hall, Kim mostly lost in thought as Jason and Trini lead her to the Gryffindor table. When they arrive Billy and Zack look up at her and smile softly, and she returns the greeting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title track is 'line of sight' by odesza.
> 
> all of filch, fake!moody, and snape's lines (from 'PEEVES' to 'close shave, potter') are right from my copy of GoF. most quoted lines I've used in one scene ever, but with kim right there, it made sense that she'd hear the bulk of it.
> 
> \---
> 
> SO hello! here we are with a kim-centred chapter!
> 
> the main bit, I said last week, is a direct canon collision. kim was in quite the pinch! and it's very possible that snape and filch wouldn't have run into her, even if fake moody wasn't blocking her from them, but he was trying to PROTECT her! 
> 
> curious, hmm!
> 
> queen maeve = legendary battle queen. by JKR's famous wizard cards, she taught young magic-users before hogwarts was founded. and that irish term she called greg 'leonchroi' means 'lionheart' in english. that'll be explained a bit down the line. relates to greg's backstory.
> 
> note that the castle paintings, statues, etc have a council, of sorts. it's a security outfit that monitors hogwarts. remember how sirius broke into the castle last year? that's a BIG deal, given it's a huge danger for the students and staff to have people from the outside getting in, and especially if the paintings and statues etc have no idea how it happened.
> 
> they call the meeting because snape said his office was broken into. by what HARRY said to fake moody after, as well, it was barty crouch! maeve overheard this (& kim only caught tiny bits of it), though I didnt write it into the text. didnt wanna put TOO many direct GoF quotes in.
> 
> but yes, harry knew cause the mauraders map said so. and assuming most of youve either read the GoF book or seen the movie, we know that it's FAKE MOODY (ie barty crouch jr in disguise, who's supposed to be dead) that broke into snapes office. but the hogwarts statues and paintings dont know that, nor does anyone else at this point in the book canon.
> 
> so by their understanding, it mightve been barty crouch SR (aka a ministry official & triwizard judge) who broke into the school in order to go through snapes potions stores? it's bizarre, but the fact remains that the castle MAY'VE been breached. that's why greg and maeve seem troubled. and when greg says 'gunhilda will want stricter measures' or whatever, he's referring to our dear humpbacked witch, who guards a passage to hogsmeade via the honeydukes cellar.
> 
> so yes. also feat kim being very Bi On Main with how she blushes at maeve! understandable. gregory poking a bit of fun at kim too, there. I love! their! relationship! she'll ask him about the 'lionheart' name soon, and we'll get some more on his backstory when she does.
> 
> meet sweetie! trini carries her around sometimes, tho cedric'll have her most days. but trini wanted to show kim! cause she knew kim'd find it interesting! LOOK AT THEM BEING SOFT! 
> 
> (now, trini had defense right before so she stuck around to wait. it was to show sweetie off, sure, but moreso to GIVE KIM SUPPORT. we SEE YOU CARING, trini!)
> 
> as for (fake) moody knowing kim's dad—and mum, though he doesnt say this—it makes sense given WE know he's a death eater. but from kims pov, it'd indeed be odd for an auror to be friends with her father! 
> 
> note kim's dad isn't in prison—he's one of the many death eaters who were never found out, never arrested. he's still working as a curse breaker for gringotts, and the only people who know were in voldemort's service themselves or have family or friends in it. which is why when rowle shouted that stuff at kim in the corridor confrontation about being 'ashamed' of her dad, it could be seen as no big deal by random students who didnt get the implications.
> 
> but yes. barty crouch jr, our fake moody, DID know kim's dad back in the day. and... he knew kim, too, when she was very little. by canon, barty jr was young when he joined the death eaters ranks—straight out of hogwarts—and kim's dad took him under his wing. kim's dad became like a father to him, and he was around kim's family a LOT. so his concern for kim, like he tried to assure her, isn't like... anything creepy. dont want you to think that's the case. it's out of that SLYTHERIN loyalty we've discussed before.
> 
> and note — fake moody now has the mauraders map & that's how he knows kim left the castle. didnt follow her. and hiM WARNING HER OFF OF SPENDING TIME AROUND HARRY is because he intends to yeet harry over to voldy! he's trying to keep kim safe and doesnt want her caught in the crossfire.
> 
> \---
> 
> sorry this is a day late, dudes! life's been kind of nuts.
> 
> to get real for a moment, I wanted to tell you all again just how much I appreciate each and every one of you. I know it's not much, but I feel so incredibly lucky that this story is brightening some of your days amidst all of this. it's honestly such a fucking honour to read your comments and get your messages. please stay safe and take care. you all are very loved.


	52. Soft Shock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/3fXx53m03IKoS5bRq3Xfq7?si=qQryRnJtSsaEwKSJauCovA). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The next morning finds Trini sat at her desk, poring over her notes in preparation for Flitwick's quiz on Banishing Charms next week. Their Quidditch pick-up match is scheduled for this afternoon, and she's intent on getting some work done before then, given how much spare time they've been spending on Animagus research as of late.

The Cure's [_Disintegration_](https://open.spotify.com/album/0A13JySVHzBoRZFk2o89Wl?si=CsH_i-hiRMigINHGjY8BSg) album is playing softly from her gramophone, providing an easy soundtrack that she finds herself humming along to every so often. Frowning, she shifts a bit in effort to get a spat of pins and needles out of her foot, careful not to jostle Sabre too much, who's purring in her lap mid-doze.

Gia is sat behind her on the floor, perched on a worn cushion pilfered from the common room with her back up against Trini's bookcase, working away on the unicorn sketch that Professor Grubbly-Plank assigned them yesterday. Open beside her on the floor is an intricate diagram of unicorn anatomy in _The Monster Book of Monsters_ , and she reaches over every few minutes absentmindedly to stroke the book, keeping its constant need for touch placated as she works.

Trini continues to make her review sheet, switching between coloured highlighters and a fountain pen every once and awhile to help it all stick out better in her mind.

It takes another hour or so, and when she's finally finished she exhales heavily, satisfied. She has a half-written letter to her dad sitting on the corner of her desk and regards it for a few moments before pulling it over, finishing up on updating him on everything at school and asking about her brothers.

From her understanding, Enrique had a bit of an incident at school a couple days ago where his magic flared out on the playground during recess. And sure, her dad assured her it was fine; it's something to be expected at his age. But she still worried.

"Gonna eat before you go?" Gia asks, peering up at her.

Roused out of her thoughts, Trini twists around and shakes her head as she pushes the letter into a crisp envelope. "No, but I'll come up with you? Don't have to leave for a bit."

Gia nods and stretches, gathering her things and getting to her feet.

The two of them make their way up to lunch alone, given Summer and Chip are still in the library working on their Muggle Studies homework. As they enter the Great Hall they find it isn't too busy yet, and they sit at the far end of the Hufflepuff table, nearest the top of the hall.

Gia's been quiet all morning, and Trini regards her with a calculating gaze. "Everything good?"

"Yeah," Gia replies, a little too quickly. She flashes a tight smile. "You know Jake?"

Trini nods slowly, remembering him from the Quidditch World Cup. He and Gia have known each other for a few years, and were quite... comfortable with each other during the post-match celebrations, if being perpetually attached at the lips is any indication.

"He asked me out."

And given Gia's behaviour, Trini's unsure if she's supposed to be enthused about this. "Okay — that's... good? Right?"

"I..." Gia starts, then frowns. "I think so? Like, he's a ride, sure. But I'm not certain if I wanna date him proper, you know?"

Gia sighs heavily, and after a few moments of silence Trini tries to prompt her. "Have you given him an answer? Even if you did, you can change your mind—"

"Said I'd think about it," Gia mutters, still frowning.

"Okay."

Trini waits, watching her clearly struggle to gather her thoughts.

"Aye, it's tough though, see," Gia says slowly, after half a minute. "We flirt, and it's fun and all, but Em's never quite liked him."

Trini regards her curiously; though Gia's clearly trying for a casual tone, this seems to be the heart of the issue. "And that's a big concern for you?"

"Definitely," Gia answers, sounding sure. "I respect her opinion more than anyone's. She's my... judgement. And my reason. All of it is tied up in her."

She pauses, hesitating. "That's not to say we always agree? Like, Jake isn't a prat or anything, not most of the time. But... I don't want to disappoint Em with something that might not even be worth it? Him and I snog when we drink but it's not..." she trails off, sighing again and running a hand through her long blonde hair.

Trini continues to wait patiently, knowing as always that talking like this is hard for Gia; she doesn't like to poke at her own feelings, which is something Trini understands well.

"I should probably mention, erm," Gia mutters, a tiny flush appearing on her cheeks, "Em and I—"

She stops abruptly, putting a hand over her face so it muffles her voice when it emerges, barely audible, "She kissed me."

_Ohmygod ohmYGOD._

Making a Herculean effort not to literally squeal with delight in the middle of the Great Hall, Trini's eyes go wide. "She— _when..._?"

"Last week," Gia answers, with obvious alarm in her eyes. "Walked me back to the common room after Hogsmeade. We were both... so _gone_. Absolutely drunk out of our minds." She gestures pitifully, eyebrows moving high up on her forehead. "And I say she kissed me but I honestly don't know who leaned in first? It was short and—" she stops talking, shaking her head. "Gods, it's so blurry but I know it happened because I've never, _ever_ felt like that."

Trini blinks rapidly. "Wait, G. What're you saying?"

Gia hangs her head. "I'm saying I'm confused as fucking hell and S says I'm in need of a—" she makes quotes in the air, "'Gay Yoda' so she directed me to you."

"Christ," Trini murmurs, nodding a couple times and thinking fast. "Well, guess that explains why you didn't tell me sooner—"

"I wanted to!" Gia says quickly, taking Trini's hand and leaning into her shoulder a bit. "And I normally would've, you gotta know that—"

"Hey, easy," Trini interjects. "Wasn't an accusation. Just saying I get it now."

Gia tips her head back. "I've been trying to work myself up to it. Talking about this is... harder than I thought it'd be?"

"Yeah," Trini mutters, squeezing her hand. She considers for a moment and jerks her head towards the door. "Listen, do you wanna go back to the dorm? The other two won't be home for another hour, maybe a bit less. But this might be better in private."

Gia sighs heavily, picking up her sandwich with a pout. "Yeah, okay."

Once they're back in their dormitory, Trini toes her slippers off and crosses the room over to Gia's bunk, climbing the glossy wood stairs up to her bed. She sits with her back up against the warm stone wall and Gia follows, propping herself up with her pillows and bringing her knees up to her chest.

As an afterthought, Trini draws her wand and waves it towards their communal shelf near the door, bringing two butterbeers sailing over. Gia pulls a surprised face as Trini mutters a Cooling Charm over them, cracks them both, and holds one out.

"It's... barely the afternoon," Gia says pointedly, taking the beer and using it to gesture to her bedside clock for emphasis.

"Hasn't stopped us before," Trini returns, sighing. "Saturdays are for questionable decisions." She pauses, humming. "Only if you want though, okay? Might make it easier to talk for you."

Trini grins then, trying to lighten the mood. "I'm joining as a courtesy."

Gia laughs lightly and stares at her beer for a few seconds before tipping her head back and taking a hearty gulp.

And she... keeps going, draining half the bottle in one go.

"O-kay," Trini murmurs, raising an eyebrow. Gia wipes at her mouth with the back of her hand and takes her own wand out, waving it to bring a small bottle of whisky floating over. Plucking it from the air, she unscrews the cap and takes a long pull, shaking her head a bit and inhaling quick through her teeth.

She chases it with the remainder of her beer and Trini just stares, mouth slightly open.

"It was the best kiss of my life," Gia rushes out in a hushed whisper, like she's confessing a precious state secret. "And you _know_ me. I've snogged a lot of people. Shite's fun, right?"

"Yeah, love."

"But this was... something else entirely. I literally thought I was gonna pass out." She flutters her fingers in a silly motion. "Is it normal for like, your feckin' _spine_ to tingle like that?"

"Normal in the sense that it happens, sure," Trini answers, taking a steady sip of her beer in effort to be a calm counter to Gia's crackling energy. "But that's not something you've experienced before?"

"Not at all," Gia mutters, looking bewildered as she lets out a disbelieving laugh. "And I well know a good kiss from an average one! Can't harp on the blokes for not knowing what they're doing. Plenty experts abounds." She shakes her head, eyes bright. "And turning me on? Fine, well and good, definitely happens. Like I said, it's fun. But _this_..."

She pulls a face. "In the moment, it freaked me out more than anything. I've tried to rationalise — like, maybe it's not because she's a... girl? She's my best friend in the world, right?"

Trini hesitates, brow furrowing. "Have you considered that it could be hard to separate those things?"

Gia sighs but doesn't reply, so Trini continues, "I reckon we have to chill with this. And I can help when it comes to trying to poke at your history, I guess? But I don't want you to freak out. Even if you _do_ fancy girls, it's not the end of the world, right?"

"No, 'course not," Gia says softly, reaching over to grip Trini's knee. "Seriously, it isn't like that. I just... I've never even considered it before. Feels like I've been hit with a sack of bricks."

"Relatable," Trini quips, and Gia smiles. "Have you ever kissed blokes who were good friends of yours?"

Gia frowns. "Don't think so? Casual mates maybe, but not like Em." She pauses, sighing. "Nobody in my life is like her in that way. Closest would be you three."

A flare of an idea sparks in the back of Trini's mind, but she sets it aside for a moment. "And Emma's the first girl you've kissed." Gia nods, and Trini hums. "Sincerely, you've never thought about it before? With her?"

"Absolutely not," Gia says, clearly telling the truth. "But now it's like... gods, it's _all_ I can think about."

They're both silent for a few moments, considering.

"I've an idea, but you might not like it," Trini says slowly, frowning. "And it's... I feel like I'm playing right into a soap trope. But given what you've told me, I reckon it makes sense?"

"If you're thinking what I figure you are, S already suggested it," Gia murmurs, sighing heavily. "Volunteered. I told her I had to ask you first." She pauses, hesitant. "Snog one of you, right?"

Trini grimaces but nods. "I mean, if you're attracted to any of the three of us, speak now. But you just said we're the closest thing you have to Emma in terms of friends, and we're all girls, so it stands to reason..." She hums, considering. "If S volunteered then I'm gonna give that to her. And I can tell you that she's an excellent kisser."

Gia waggles her eyebrows. "You'd know, of course."

Trini rolls her eyes playfully. "Yup," she replies, with a _pop_ of her lips. "And you all know my gayness can be seen from space, but S constantly whines about her lack of lady-attraction, right? I wanna control for as many variables as we can."

"Proper scientific method," Gia mutters, laughing. "I respect that."

.

A half hour later, Trini and Gia are still chatting when Summer and Chip come through the door, both looking a bit sluggish.

Gia covers her face with her hands as Trini flashes a devilish grin and crawls to the edge of the bunk, sticking her head out into the room. "S, I need your lips for science, please."

Summer stares at her for a moment before perking up all at once, grinning _wickedly_. "So you had a chat, then? Grandmaster Gay?"

Trini laughs. "Seems my wisdom wasn't needed, given you already suggested this."

"Mmkay, I've coffee breath. Hold up," Summer drawls, walking into the bathroom and picking up her toothbrush.

Trini jerks her head at Chip. "Charlie, my love, do you have those mints?"

Chip smirks and reaches into her bag, digging out a little tin and tossing across the room. It rattles at it flies through the air and Trini catches it, taking one out and placing it in Gia's palm gently.

Gia just stares at her, worrying at her lip, and Trini's eyes soften. "You sure you're okay to do this?" she asks quietly, reaching over to squeeze her shoulder.

"Gods, I snog people all the time! Dunno why I'm feckin' nervous?"

"'Cause I'm hot, babes," Summer calls, walking over to peer up at them from next to Gia's bed. "Get down here."

Gia groans and gets to her feet, following Trini down. They sort of stand there for a moment, and Trini pushes the two of them closer together. "Okay, Chip and I are gonna turn around to let you two have some privacy." Trini looks to Summer, who meets her eyes. "First one go easy. Second one..." she trails off, raising her eyebrows, and Summer seems to get the message.

"Sure boss," Summer chimes, though her face softens as Gia looks at her. "Hey — you certain this is cool? This isn't a pressure thing. No way. But you and I've kissed enough people...? And genuinely, I wanna help you figure this out if I can."

Gia sighs, nodding. "I'm good. Let's do it."

Summer smiles. "Okay, hands on my hips. I'm gonna touch your face, alright?"

"Deal."

Trini nods, giving Chip a look, and they both turn their backs and walk to the other side of the room. "Okay S, cold test," she says, waving her wand at her gramophone so that the album she was playing earlier begins to play, flicking her wrist to increase the volume. ['Plainsong'](https://open.spotify.com/track/7MkWXuDcqo09FmVut8Ugkl?si=P_pNlblEQq-M00d9WfeUww) starts up mid-track, and it's soon loud enough that it gives them a bit more privacy.

Not ten seconds have gone by when Summer calls out behind them, just loud enough to be heard over the music, "You're good, turn around."

Trini waves her wand to reduce the volume again, and her and Chip both walk back over, watching Gia carefully. But she's frowning, looking even more confused than before.

"I... have no idea if that made things clearer or not," Gia mutters, giving Summer an apologetic smile before meeting Trini's eyes. "No spine tingling, though. Which is... good? I guess?"

"Rude," Summer deadpans, though she's smiling too. "Okay, hot test now. Can't have my skills thrown into question. Fuck's sake."

Trini grins and nods, and her and Chip do the same as they did before, turning around and crossing the room as she increases the volume on her gramophone again.

"Give us a bit more time for this one, ladies," Summer calls in a low drawl. Her voice drops into a murmur, and Trini can't catch anything else she says over the music, figuring it's supposed to be for Gia's ears only, anyway.

Trini rocks back and forth on the balls of her feet as they wait, Chip sending a few genuinely concerned glances over in her peripherals. The two of them can relate when it comes to confusion about their identity, and they've certainly talked about it extensively in the past—that state of being unsure about who you are or who you're attracted to can be extremely tough to navigate.

They just want Gia to be spared some of that, if possible.

When Summer calls out to them again, Trini turns off the gramophone completely and shares one last glance with Chip before turning around.

But Gia's _beaming_.

She doesn't even wait for them to fully walk over before she shakes her head and announces, "Lads, I might be a tad bit gay!"

And Trini laughs loudly, smiling wide and rushing over with Chip to put a hand on Gia's shoulder. Summer's just standing there watching, more pride in her eyes than anything, though there's a smug smirk toying with the corner of her lips.

"I mean, yeah," Gia continues, looking between the three of them. "It wasn't the same as Em, no offense S—"

"Surprisingly enough, none taken," Summer returns, still looking proud as ever.

"But it was... definitely something," Gia finishes, brow twitching. "I—" she stops, humming. "I don't think it's like a hundred percent thing though? People are bi, right?"

"Absolutely," Trini says, squeezing her shoulder. "All on a scale, never a hundred either way. But this is a huge step."

Gia pushes forward and hugs Summer tight, muttering soft words of thanks into her hair. Summer pecks her on the forehead gently, nuzzling a bit, and Gia holds out an arm for Trini and Chip to join.

The four of them embrace, smiling, and Trini lets out another airy laugh. Feeling more proud of Gia than she could ever express.

.

"Like, I get you're busy," Kim's saying a few hours later, exiting the Slytherin common room with Tommy. They turn into the corridor and the unmarked wall that hides the entrance slides shut with a _crack_ behind them. "But even playing once every couple weeks? Zack and Trini really want to get to know you better."

Tommy hesitates, fidgeting with the sleeve of her black hoodie. "Honest, Kimcam. I'd love to get to know them better too. And Zack's..." she trails off, pursing her lips with a small smile that's almost bashful. "The Yule Ball was nice, with everyone."

Kim grins, though it quickly fades when she sees the uncertainty in Tommy's eyes. "But...?"

"But I feel _weird_ , like I'm intruding or some shit—"

Stopping in the middle of the corridor, Kim grabs her forearm gently. "Hey, come on."

But Tommy just stares back, searching her eyes. "I'm getting to know them slowly. We'll get there, okay? For now I'm just happy you've found such a good group."

Kim sighs, running a hand through her damp hair as they start walking again. "I'm... I don't want you to think I'm trying to pressure you into like, being okay with spending a ton of time with me or anything—"

"You know it's not that," Tommy interjects softly, sighing too. "Just don't wanna crowd. Let me come to you lot, okay? And I appreciate the invite to your midnight research sessions, really. If I can help you with it at all I will. But I'm not there with them enough to insert myself into a long-term commitment like that."

"Again, you're welcome to it," Kim says, turning a corner. "You aren't inserting yourself, we're _asking_ you to come."

Tommy shrugs. "If you lot manage to pull it off, I'd def be down for some animal shenanigans one day. Maybe you can help me with it down the line."

"Alright," Kim says softly, reaching down and lacing their fingers together. Tommy squeezes her hand once.

"What do you think you'll be?"

Kim smiles. "Not sure. From what we've read, it seems super tough to predict? The magic is ancient."

"Mysterious," Tommy mutters, grinning. "Though... have you asked Mumma Kim for pointers? She knows her stuff. Got all those books on it, too."

Kim blinks a couple times, frowning. "Books? What?"

Tommy chuckles. "Only reason I know that is 'cause I'm scarred — remember when we was in our Crayon Phase and Peppy drew all over the walls of your parents' office?"

"I..." Kim starts, humming. "Vaguely? Mum left his—" she makes exaggerated quotes in the air, "'artwork' up in the old house. I think she has a photo of it on her desk."

"'It might be worth money one day, kids,'" Tommy says, lightly imitating Kim's mum's Gujarati accent. "That's cute she kept it."

Kim laughs, then frowns after a few moments. "Wait, why're you scarred though? We didn't get in trouble for that, did we?"

Tommy shakes her head. "Nah, but I took a pack of crayons to a bunch of my dad's books around the same time. He wasn't upset either, but he said that it wasn't nice to draw on other people's belongings."

"And you were forced to confront the horror of what you'd done?" Kim asks, grinning.

"Of what _we'd_ done. You're not innocent."

Kim laughs, starting up the main dungeon staircase that'll take them up to the Great Hall for supper.

Tommy waves her hand around vaguely. "Your mum sent me a couple of our contemporary art books back in September 'cause she knew I was doing the Animagi unit with McG. Said in her letter that most of the books she has on it aren't in English, but these two were."

Kim's eyebrows shoot up. "Do you still have them?" she asks, figuring it's a long shot.

Tommy confirms her assumption, shaking her head. "I couldn't steal books from your mother!" she says, jokingly scandalised. "Mainly looked at the drawings, anyway. Figure she more meant it as a thing to make me smile than for actual school-reading."

She pauses, squinting. "Or... she might've meant me to read them. Used to having a nerd for a kid, I guess."

"Yeah, yeah," Kim mutters. "And you don't remember the titles?"

Tommy shakes her head again. "Sorry." She grins then, looking goofily over at Kim. "I _can_ confirm that one of them features an entirely purple toucan and a lion with a blue mane, though."

"Helpful," Kim quips, rolling her eyes good-naturedly. "I already asked her about it... lied and said I'd overheard people chatting about the magic. I'm planning on writing with a few more questions, but she'll cotton on, don't you think?"

"And outright telling her isn't a good idea?"

"Don't think so."

Tommy hums knowingly. "I reckon she'd be more concerned with you accidentally half-transfiguring yourself into a baboon, mate. Like, you're kind of piecing it together from a mess of different sources, right? Wouldn't having actual confirmation be the safest?"

Kim opens her mouth and closes it, considering. "When you put it like that... probably. I _did_ indicate to the others that she'd be helpful. But I..." she trails off, frowning.

"Hoped you guys'd find everything and you wouldn't have to tell her?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Makes sense," Tommy says. "I mean, you know her best. Maybe you do as much research as you possibly can and only ask her if you lot get so stuck that you can't figure it out?" She pauses, squinting a bit again. "But I really, really think you need to check it with her before you start proper."

Kim sighs heavily, nodding a couple times.

Tommy squeezes her hand again, swinging it a bit before letting go. "Okay, how about this—" she holds her hands out, like she's trying to bookend her words, "what if you find out what you can, then write her with a detailed outline of it all? Send a big letter with it explaining how important it is to you and how much time you lot've already spent, too?"

She frowns. "Like, tell her you love her and all that good shit? And you might even have the entire thing down by then, so she's gonna see all the effort in that alone. But tell her nicely that you're gonna do it regardless and that you really would like her help, just to go through it and confirm that you've got everything correct so you don't die on accident."

Kim's eyes widen. "You want me to... use potential magical catastrophe to essentially blackmail my mother?"

Tommy chuckles. "Not at all — show her how much it means to you! None of what you'd say would be insincere. I'm being genuine, here—" she reflexively shoves Kim's shoulder, watching the grin grow on her face, "do _not_ make your stupid, stupid joke. I'm trying to help, you dolt."

"I thought you were Being Genuine?" Kim mutters in a faux-confused voice, eyes twinkling.

Tommy blows a raspberry and makes a snatch for her, but Kim squeals and dodges out of the way, taking off up the staircase two steps at a time.

"WHAT DID I SAY?" Tommy calls from a few stairs behind her, keeping pace. "WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS?!"

Cackling madly, Kim clambers onto a landing, grabbing at a bannister post to wildly swing herself around to the next flight of stairs. "YOU LOVE ME, BITCH!"

"I'LL LOVE YOU MORE ONCE YOU'RE OFF THIS MORTAL COIL, BITCH!"

.

A few storeys up, Trini's emerging out of the door to the Hufflepuff basement and into the Entrance Hall with her roommates beside her, making their way into supper. Content with the familiar post pick-up game pull in her tired muscles, she rolls her neck a bit, focused on chatting lightly with Chip when a ridiculous, clownish sound reaches her ears.

It's like someone stepping on one of Kwanza's squeaky toys over and over in a sprint—

Then there's a _crack_ of a spell going off, followed by another muffled _snap—_

Trini whirls around just in time to see someone go _zooming_ past her in a blur, bolting into the Great Hall and skidding to a stop once inside, putting their back up against the wall beside the door and breathing heavily, looking absolutely _delighted_.

Kim.

_Of course._

Trini quirks an eyebrow, poking her head back into the Entrance Hall to see Tommy standing in the middle of it teetering precariously, arms thrown out on either side of her like she's walking an invisible tightrope. 

Within another couple moments Tommy falls over completely, landing on her backside with a huff. Pouting, she throws her head back to the cavernous ceiling and shouts in a whine that makes her sound like a toddler, "KIMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!"

Trini shakes her head, rolling her eyes as she follows her roommates into the Great Hall proper, murmuring a soft goodbye and breaking off from them to sit with Zack, Billy, and Jason at the Ravenclaw table.

"Hey, all," Trini says, smiling at the bemused look on Jason's face. He's got his eyes fixed on the doors, no doubt having witnessed part of the shenanigans too. Zack jerks his head at her in greeting but doesn't speak, too busy shoveling roast beef into his mouth, and Billy smiles at her as she sits next to him, budging up.

"Here they come," Jason mutters, still watching the doors. Zack perks up beside him, spine straightening a little.

Trini twists around to see Kim carrying Tommy in a piggyback, the silly sound from before obnoxiously announcing their approach in a _squeak_ , step, _squeak_ , step, _squeak_ , step.

Kim sails past the Ravenclaw table with all of the subtlety of a technicoloured parade float and turns down the aisle, soon stopping next to Jason and Billy with a silly grin. "Someone's gonna sit with us!" she announces happily. Tommy doesn't make to get off, though, grumbling something Trini doesn't catch from atop Kim's back.

Jason stares up at Tommy for a moment before raising an eyebrow in question. "Er... gonna come down, love?"

Tommy scoffs. "My legs don't WORK very well right now, Pep."

Kim lets out a diabolical chuckle. "To be fair, you hit me first—"

"Only your _shoe_ , you—"

"Hush with the fuss, you're fine—"

"You just _wait_ —"

Jason sighs tiredly, seeming to get the gist and standing up. "Okay, okay. Let's get you situated."

"Jelly-Legs is a _wonder_ of magical invention, don't you think?" Kim drawls, and Tommy reaches up to mess up her choppy hair in response.

Jason links his arms underneath Tommy's then, wrapping around her waist and lifting her up. Kim bends a bit to grab her legs, gently directing them underneath the table, and together they arrange Tommy safely on the bench next to Zack.

Zack kind of just glances at her in his peripherals, and Trini fondly watches as his pompous demeanour visibly deflates to something much more timid. "Nice to have you," he mutters, and Tommy drops her glare, looking over at him and bumping her shoulder into his with a small shy smile.

Jason and Kim sit next to Tommy, him making a clear point to physically separate them, and Kim meets Trini's eyes across the table.

Ignoring the distinct feeling of her stomach doing a spontaneous backflip (and most definitely not sticking the landing), Trini gives Kim a soft smile back, the corner of her mouth twitching up a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'soft shock' by yeah yeah yeahs. GREAT TUNE!
> 
> jake, here, is [jake holling](https://powerrangers.fandom.com/wiki/Jake_Holling) from the same PR series gia and emma are from! my stupid son. you previously met him, though not by name, when him and gia were making out at the quidditch world cup. one of his cousins is on the irish team. so yes, him and gia kind of have history?
> 
> \---
> 
> ANYWAY! HELLO! welcome to a mainly trini-focused chapter! gia's having a tough time and our girl is trying to help. I know some of you are big gia/emma fans and like... mood. they're gonna have a complicated go of it over the next few in-fic years, but they're LIKE! MEANT FOR EACH OTHER! OKAY! I CAN'T THINK ABOUT THEM OR I WILL CRY! 
> 
> (and note... emma may or may not remember that kiss. we shall see.)
> 
> and some background on kim/jason/tommy there, plus a bit about how maddy's been since tommy's mum left — she's very much taken a parent-like approach with tommy and writes her all the time. it's really cute and I love them. & maddy has some books on the animagus process, because of course she does? she's an animagus! as are kim's grandparents! 
> 
> but yes — note tommy's present unwillingness to be included in the animagi stuff. she's not there in her relationship with the other kids yet, it's true, but she's also (despite what she said to kim) a bit hesitant about being around all of the time. as jason said in the 'forever' chapter, when they were talking under the beech tree—kim really hurt tommy when everything went down. we know this. and though tommy doesn't RESENT her for that, she's cautious? just trying not to drive kim away or smother her, I guess. and we know that none of what happened between kim/jason/tommy was tommy's FAULT, but that's where her mind goes. more on that in a few fic-months, when she has a chat with trini about it, of all people.
> 
> also note that trini and summer have kissed before, but it's not a big deal! so don't freak out! this is a LOVING SUMMER ZONE! WE ALL ADORE HER IN THIS HOUSE! the making out was... very drunk, in the middle of a hufflepuff party one time. chip alluded to this back in the halloween episode ('by your side') but you have textual confirmation here. and summer, by what trini said to gia, really doesn't feel attraction when it comes to the ladies! she actually... has tough time with attraction, generally. more on that down the line. but yeah, there's nothing like, romantic there between them, nor does trini feel any type of way about summer in that respect. but you kiss your friends at parties sometimes! it happens! 
> 
> as for tommy and kim being the Usual Idiots — if it wasn't clear, tommy hit kim's shoe with a spell that caused it to squeak every time she put weight down. was her idea of like... 'oh kim, you're gonna clown around? LET ME HELP YOU FIT THE PART!' kind of thing. they're silly, yaknow? again, kim/jason/tommy very much have the sibling vibe going on. you saw that with kim and jason in the hogsmeade chapter recently, but yes. as tommy begins to slowly hang around the core five more often, you'll get to see more displays of lovely stupidity!
> 
> \---
> 
> next time on glee: among other things, there will be a _really fucking soft_ trimberly one-on-one interaction in the dead of night. kim's feeling a bit off and trini notices, which leads to lifechats. it's SOOOOO! 
> 
> I hope you all are doing well and taking care of yourselves/staying safe. as always, I can't thank you enough for continuing to read this thing and commenting. your enthusiasm seriously fuels me dudes! until next time! <3


	53. Paper Planes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***NOTE: trigger warning for discussions of addiction.
> 
> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/5GzgEC6pWf1USZsCtkG8yC?si=NqK_0gbPTMevQMwkp3j9sQ). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

A few nights later the five of them are back in the Restricted Section of the pitch dark library, each poring over their own stack of books by the light of Kim's antique gas lamp.

Kim's half listening to Billy read aloud, half skimming the chapter on Patronus magic in _Charms of Defence and Deterrence_ —authored by one Catullus Spangle, who happens to have one of the best names she's ever come across. 

From their research so far, they know that the blueish guardians conjured by the Patronus Charm have a tendency to mirror Animagus forms. It's not a sure thing, but given the general absence of information on Animagi in the literature, they all figured it wouldn't hurt to read up on related topics.

Because there's no concrete way to predict what animal form a person will take upon becoming an Animagus—from what Professor McGonagall said last year, it's one of those things that, once you morph for the first time, just tends to make _sense_. Kim can only hope that she doesn't turn into some wretched creature (though that could very well be what happens, given her track record).

If the magic reflects everything you _are_ , what does that mean for her? It's all-encompassing and ties everything together, sure, but is there room for regret? For wanting to become better than you were?

Or is it one big swirling amalgamation, uncaring of her intentions? 

Kim pictures herself turning into a troll and sighs lightly, shaking her head a little and looking up, staring at the bookshelf behind Jason and blinking a few times, trying to bring herself back into the moment. Billy's voice is sounding in a gentle, safe kind of mutter that plays through the back of her mind, not entirely processing but not ignoring either. 

She takes a quiet, deep breath in and out.

And she feels Trini's eyes before she meets them; already watching her, the warm golden light of the gas lamp flickering against the browns. 

Kim smiles softly, flashing a little uptick of the side of her mouth paired with a slight narrowing of her eyes. Only for a heartbeat; an attempt at playful levity to brush it all aside. 

But Trini just continues to watch her with something unreadable on her face, not taking the bait. And they're already close, sitting at a slight angle with their knees touching, but Trini shifts her weight and moves a bit to the side, left hand covering Kim's right where it rests on the book.

Trini interlaces their fingers gently, carefully; so much purposeful in the action. And it's the _intention_ of it all that causes Kim's jaw to flex as she looks down at their hands, nostrils flaring once with the sharp breath in, tongue moving over her teeth as she blinks rapidly. Because this isn't regular Trini behaviour—not the stubborn, constant need to make everything seem casual, off-hand, half thought out; like if she were to really seem conscious in her actions, in her care, it would be too revealing, somehow.

No. Now, Trini's being nothing but deliberate.

"Lads, can we take a break?" Trini whispers, and the three boys look up at her with soft smiles.

"Yeah, of course," Billy replies quietly, massaging the back of his neck a little. Zack starts going through his rucksack at once, fishing for his endless supply of snacks, and Jason leans over to make a request, chattering lowly.

Trini tips closer to Kim, voice emerging only just loud enough for her to hear this time. "I'm not gonna ask if you're alright," she breathes, not making to take her hand away. "But do you wanna take a walk with me?"

Kim's brow twitches, eyes still fixed on their hands. "I..." she starts, then stops. Takes another deep breath in and out. "Yeah, okay."

Trini hums and gets to her feet, tugging Kim up gently before towing her away from the boys. "We'll be back," she whispers over her shoulder, and Billy gives a little hum in goodbye.

The two of them walk towards the entrance to the Restricted Section, soon stepping over the thick divider rope and into the main part of the empty library. And as they slowly start down the wide centre aisle—with the bright white light from the half moon streaking in through the tall windows on one side, painting the towering stacks that stretch up to the cavernous, intricately-carved ceiling—the silence is full; humming. As if steeped in something that Kim can't name.

It's like a cathedral by night, maybe—everyone gone, candles and torches out, echoes of hymns and songs and voices somehow contained in everything, sounding beyond the threshold of her hearing. It might just be the hushed quiet that betrays the life of it all, or the warmth she can feel coming off the ancient books as they pass in the dark, spinning into the still air, all ancient wood and ink and old parchment and leather bindings.

The magic of this place is potent, tangible in its presence around them. And Kim's never been particularly religious, but she has a fleeting thought that this might be the closest she's ever felt to the gods; right here, right now, walking amongst the stories, the knowledge, the history of everyone who came before them. Walking with Trini's hand still curled around hers; a tether in the immense, full silence that surrounds them on all sides, in this place that will still be here long after they're gone. 

Kim takes another steadying breath, letting it all wash over her—trying to really _register_ the magic that she can feel singing on her skin as they continue to walk, passing by the endless shelves in a quiet that seems so big, so much in how it fills her up. Ringing even in the darkest parts of her mind, chasing the shadows away.

And Kim's not sure how long it's been when Trini tugs on her hand a bit, pulling her away from the moonlight and down one of the narrow aisles between the stacks, toward one of the many reading rooms off of the main hall.

They walk under the archway and come into the empty space: all sighing dark wood floors and wall panels, with a few proud tables scattered between the groups of plush chairs gossiping by the windows; books reach right up to the flat ceiling on all sides, save for the great unlit beckoning fireplace in the centre of the back wall. 

Crossing the room in a nearly silent stride, Trini brings them to a stop just in front of it, drawing her wand out of her sleeve.

" _Incendio_."

The fireplace sparks to life with enthusiasm, flames greeting the dry logs with little _pops_ and _cracks_ , soon providing the only source of light in the pitch dark room.

Trini looks over at Kim for the first time since they left the boys, searching her eyes. 

"This okay?"

Kim gives her a small smile in reply and they sit down on the plush rug laid out in front of the fireplace, the light of the flames reaching out over the patterns woven into the deep red silk and washing over their still-interlinked hands.

The two of them stare at it for a few minutes in silence, Trini's thumb brushing over Kim's knuckles every once and awhile, so softly that she might not even know she's doing it at all.

And Kim breathes; deep and slow, in and out, anchoring herself in the moment, in the feeling, still tethered to the world by Trini's hand. She's never been in the library quite like this—her previous late night outings have been limited to sneaking around the Restricted Section, getting what she needed, and leaving quickly. 

But here, after igniting the fire like a beacon that could bring anyone and everyone running in, the action so brazen and purposeful, Kim just watches as Trini sits in the warm silence of it all. As if she couldn't give a fuck if the entire school found them like this; like her only concern in the world is trying making Kim feel a tiny bit better in this moment, to light up her life a little, to be a steadfast warmth in opposition to the gripping cold lingering against her heart.

"I don't want you to feel pressured to talk," Trini says quietly. "Just... I know you've kind of been in your head tonight."

Kim hums, unfolding one of her legs to stretch it out, feeling the warmth of the fire kiss the inch or so of exposed skin between the top of her sock and the ankle of her black joggers. "I got another letter from my dad this morning," she says quietly.

Trini doesn't speak, seemingly content to wait in the comfortable silence that exists between them now. And it's so much different than what Kim's used to, this belonging; it's weighted, but not uncomfortably, perhaps suspended by the humming energy that's always been alive between them, that Kim _swears_ she felt on the very first day they met.

Kim tries to get her thoughts in order, eyes fixed on the flames dancing in the hearth. "I figure that Moody mentioning him last week might've got to me, too," she adds, only coming to terms with the truth of the statement as she voices it aloud. "It's so strange, missing someone who isn't actually gone? Not that I'd want him to—"

Her brow twitches as she inhales sharply through her teeth, blinking a few times. Watches the fire for half a minute before she whispers, "But you... get that, don't you?"

Trini tilts her head back a bit, and Kim glances over to see her eyes flitting around like they do when she's doing some very quick thinking. It's such a small thing, such a tiny action that Trini unconsciously does all the time, but Kim knows it now. She _knows_ it now.

"Reckon I might, yeah," Trini mutters.

Kim sighs, looking back at the fireplace. "How do you..." she trails off, frowning. "And you don't have to answer this. I just don't know how I'm supposed to arrange it all in my mind, I guess?"

"How do I deal with it?" Trini breathes, voice much smaller than usual.

"Yeah."

Trini blinks slowly, nodding her head a couple times. "I'm not sure if I can give you a good answer." She pauses, right hand moving to grip at her knee. "Sometimes I'll wonder where she is or what she's doing. But if I started getting letters from her, even if there was a good reason like with your dad, I don't think I'd open them, either."

Kim hums, sighing lightly, and Trini runs her thumb over her knuckles again, brow furrowed. 

There's clearly something else, so Kim waits.

"I never told you this because it didn't feel relevant before," Trini says, voice still timid. "But my mum didn't leave, exactly." She frowns, sighing. "Well, she _did,_ but my dad kicked her out. She had—or still has, not sure—a drinking problem."

Kim feels her own eyes soften, and she squeezes Trini's fingers gently between hers once. Trini looks down at them and continues, "And it wasn't in the way that you see on the telly, where the person's belligerent and violent?" Her voice shakes a little, and her grip on her knee tightens reflexively. "It was quieter than that. She'd start every day in the late afternoon, and by four or five o'clock we couldn't really talk to her? She was there but she wasn't."

"Growing up like that was so strange, and I didn't really realise how much it affected me until I got older," she says quietly. "That silence, that not talking about things — because if you did say something it would stir stuff up for a few days and make it hurt more until everything went back to the same shit — it's _me_ , now."

Trini sighs heavily, shaking her head. "I'm not making sense—"

"You are," Kim interjects gently.

Trini gives her a small, tight-lipped smile. "It did a number on me, I guess. 'Cause despite her being checked out half the time, she was still my mum for the rest, you know? We'd laugh together, she dropped me off and picked me up every day from school, took me to football practice in the mornings. As long as it happened during the daytime, she was right there with us."

"But we always lost the nights," Trini breathes, eyes glazed over as she stares ahead at the fireplace, shoulders falling a little. "I don't remember her any different. And my dad tried everything he could to help her for _years_ —sometimes there'd be progress, but it always ended with her flipping out and insisting she didn't have a problem. She just couldn't see it... not like us."

Kim sighs and nods, understanding better than she wishes she did. And Trini seems to sense it, because she shifts, moving so the sides of their bodies are pressed flush together. Brings their interlinked hands up to rest them on their thighs.

"I remember this one night so clearly," Trini continues, after a deep breath in and out. "Not long before she left for good. She'd fallen asleep on the sofa early in the evening like usual, so I took the glass out of her hand and brought it to the kitchen, then went back to put a blanket over her. And I was tucking it around her when I looked up and saw my dad standing at the base of the stairs, watching me with this... _look_ on his face."

She sighs, her shoulder gently pushing against Kim's in a way that's grounding, almost. "And I was young, sure, but I saw what it did to him? To see someone you love _in_ something like that, where they're both unable and unwilling to get out? Watching your little kid dealing with it like it's normal?"

Trini shakes her head, jaw flexing. "I'm telling you this because—and please don't be offended at the comparison—but the stuff with your dad sort of sounds like how my mum was?" She trails off and pauses, like she's trying to find the words. "That idea of being pulled to something so forcefully even though it's bad for you? To keep going back to it—" her voice shakes, "even though _everyone's_ asking you to stop?"

She falls silent then, and Kim watches her with such a profound heartbreak radiating out from her chest that she can feel stirring in her own eyes.

Because Trini _gets_ it. Trini understands her.

"Again, I know it's not the same—"

"Trin," Kim interjects softly. "It's _really_ similar. I'd... no idea we could relate on this, and I'm sorry."

Trini inclines her head, tipping a bit of her weight into Kim's shoulder. "Again, that's all to say that I can understand your situation a little bit, and it must be so hard for you. I don't know what I'd do if she tried to contact me." Her jaw flexes. "I'm still so _angry_ with her."

She sighs heavily, pushing her reading glasses up onto her forehead and pinching at the bridge of her nose. "Mind, I know the science on addiction. It's not entirely their fault—I _know_ that. But there comes a point where they have to take some responsibility, right? Even if they fuck up over and over. When the people you love beg and plead with you to stop, to get help, to try and change," her voice falters again, breaking proper this time, "that should fucking _mean_ something."

Kim wraps an arm around Trini's shoulders, pulling her in even closer.

Trini lets out a breath, replacing her glasses and pushing them up with one finger. She reaches up to her shoulder and interlaces her right hand with Kim's, shaking her head. "So I don't know if I can tell you how to deal, 'cause I'm not sure if I'm doing very well with it myself." Her jaw flexes, and a bitter scoff escapes her lips. "The truth is, I miss her so much some days that I think I'll lose myself in it. And it's fucking ridiculous because she's still alive? But she... fractured _everything_."

Kim sighs and Trini puts the sides of their heads together gently. They sit in silence for nearly a minute, staring into the hearth.

"Are we supposed to forgive them?" Kim asks then, voice barely audible, addressing the flames. "And like, how do you even begin to forgive someone like that? How do you come to grips with the fact that part of them chose that... _thing_ over you?"

Trini's brow furrows; Kim feels it against her temple. "I don't know if we're supposed to," she breathes. "But it's not on you to try and repair it, Kim."

"It's not on you either," Kim says quietly, recalling the talk she had with her mum over winter break.

Trini takes a deep breath in and out, steadying herself. "I know. But my stuff was a long time ago, and all this with your dad is happening now. I told you all of that 'cause I wanna help, you know?"

"You are. I can't say how much you are," Kim says, squeezing her hand. "I think sometimes, just knowing someone else gets it is... kind of everything."

"I'm here with you," Trini whispers. She hesitates briefly, thumb stroking Kim's knuckles a couple times. "Do you... do you want to tell me about him, maybe? What he's like?"

Kim opens her mouth a bit, closes it. "I... okay."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

.

Jason finds them some time later, quietly walking in and informing them both in a soft voice that Zack's had too much sugar and needs supervision, please.

Kim and Trini share a little smile, and once they're all back in the Restricted Section (having wrangled Billy and Zack from where they were searching elsewhere in the library) Billy begins going line-by-line in the journal he found.

As he writes in his own notebook, he reads aloud again, "'...with the light of the full moon as my only witness, her rays permitting this foray into the unknown, I began my ritualistic meditation.''

Kim taps her knee with her fountain pen, nodding slowly. "I definitely think that's something—the first bit with the full moon." She pauses, bringing the end of it to her lips. "Him using the word 'permitting' seems awful specific, don't you figure?"

"Meaning it _has_ to happen by the light of a full moon," Billy says, humming thoughtfully.

"Yes," Kim mutters. "Not just referring to a month in time, but with the inclusion of the two full moons as bookends."

"So," Trini starts, writing in her notebook as well, "we need to have the Mandrake leaves on hand for the start of the ritual at the first full moon. Then there's something we have to do to maintain it that might restrict us from eating while we wait for the _second_ moon..."

She trails off, frowning. "At which time the 'offerings' are given, apparently. Might mean the potion starts to brew, or there're some legitimate offerings we have to make? _Then_ some more 'tedious' maintenance for an unidentified period of time, which ends in a storm where we drink the potion and transform."

"That's three stages," Zack mutters, jotting it down quickly, his usual spiky handwriting nigh illegible to anyone but himself.

"Gives us a concrete timeline to consider, too," Jason says, pulling Billy's large moon phase chart closer to himself and looking down at it. "Full moons on 15 February, 17 March, 15 April, 14 May, 13 June..."

"And if I could note something," Billy interjects, eyes flying over his own notes, "there are multiple times where he talks about his anxiety over having to start again between the second and third stages. He seemed to be quite prepared otherwise, so whatever it was that might've forced him to start over... that could be something we can't control for."

"In regards to the maintenance you have to do?" Trini asks.

"Yes."

Zack hums. "So we might need some write-off moons."

"Good point," Kim says, patting Zack's knee. "From what my mum's told me over the years, the process is quite taxing. She said kids had to start over often, and it wasn't always because they weren't prepared."

Trini nods. "Could be something to do with the weather bit? Or maybe there's a time limit—" she pauses abruptly, frowning again. "Wait, no. We know it can take different amounts of time for everyone, so that can't be it."

"Let's go with the weather theory for the moment," Billy murmurs. 

"Yoooo," Zack says quietly, smacking his book with his hand and perking up, bright excitement in his dark eyes. "Guys — I think I know what the leaves're for!"

The four of them glance up to watch as Zack nods slowly to himself, running a finger down a page of the old Herbology book perched on his thigh. "I'm talking about the first stage, mind. This passage on Mandrake leaves says that the 'not unpleasant taste' is optimal for their use in the Animagus process, then this: 'When steeped in the caster's saliva for a full month, the leaves are also unique in that they structurally break down very little. Though accidental ingestion frequently occurs, it is harmless to the user.'"

Zack chuckles lowly. "It goes on to talk about a guy who reportedly swallowed _eight_ of them over the same amount of months while trying to go through the process." He looks up at them all, a grin playing at his lips. "We've gotta hold those suckers in our mouths for a month without swallowing them on accident! That explains the bits where our bloke—" he nods at the journal, "had problems eating, innit? Wasn't about dietary restrictions at all!"

Trini stares at him. "He was just having trouble keeping it in his mouth...?"

Zack nods and she tilts her head, blinking slowly.

"That... actually tracks," Billy says quietly. His eyes widen a bit, still fixed on the journal. "Given he said all he would need to start is the Mandrake leaf and nothing else?"

Kim lets out a little gasp. "Zack! This is huge!"

He gives her a goofy incline of his head. "Still gotta confirm with your mum, but I really reckon we've got something."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'paper planes' by elina. please thank our resident Master of the Universe [WishingTree (LucyInTheSky)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WishingTree/pseuds/LucyInTheSky) for showing me the song. had it playing on loop as I wrote the one on one scene with kim and trini.
> 
> \---
> 
> SO HELLO! my bad on being a bit behind in our regularly scheduled programming, all. life's been nuts.
> 
> first off, I wanted to say right out the gate that I am NOT comparing addicts to death eaters on like... the base level. so please don't come for me. that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that drawing a line between kim's dad's pull to dark magic and addiction has basis, here? that whole constantly going back to something that is bad for you. maddy's made the same comparison to kim many times in trying to help her understand. and for someone like trini who has explicit experience with it, the connection could be made.
> 
> and note... kim and tommy can ALSO relate where this whole thing is concerned, but you'll learn down the line that tommy's mum has been presumed dead by her family and friends by now. where kim's dad has popped up over the years, still sending her birthday gifts and things, tommy's mum went completely dark after both of them were revealed to be death eaters. not every situation is the same, and there are layers to this.
> 
> so yes. kim doesn't feel like she can really TALK about this particular bit with tommy—missing someone who isn't actually gone—because she feels like it would be insensitive to the fact that tommy's mum IS really gone. does that make sense?
> 
> moving on: some background on trini's mum, there. our two girls getting to know each other is a push and pull, and them finding new ways to support/better understand one another is GREAT STUFF. good shit.
> 
> otherwise, we're going along slowly with the animagus research! everything's coming together! and note that kim took tommy's words from last chapter to heart — she's gonna be writing her mum again with... less half-truths in terms of their pursuit of the animagus process. so yes.
> 
> \---
> 
> I know this chapter was a bit slower but it's all set up for some BIG STUFF that's coming up, all! hope you enjoyed it regardless. our girls are getting closerrrrrrrrrrrrr! _screams_
> 
> if it isn't apparent, I've been kind of swamped the last week or so! fyi! tad bit scatterbrained! but we TRUCKING ALONG.
> 
> I appreciate you all very much and hope you're staying safe. comments and such are always super duper great, and thank you for keeping on this train with me <3


	54. The Origin Of Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***NOTE: trigger warning for passing mentions of sucidal ideation. it's just relating to greg's backstory and kim's medical treatments when she was in st. mungo's hospital, nothing in-depth.
> 
> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/4AQmxxQQSfisCPytqaGbl9?si=dR13oEHyQkGn47RtBGSyNg). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

February arrives in a chilly haze, bringing a slow thaw that renders the Hogwarts grounds wet and muddy. The air is clean and rich with it, moisture lingering on Kim's skin as she breathes in deep lungfuls on the way down to the Quidditch pitch. She's got her kit duffel and broom strap slung in an X across her torso, boots _squelching_ with every step she takes through the mist that covers the ground up to her knees.

It isn't quite warm enough yet to reduce visibility proper, the cool air steadfast in halting the fog before it can get too ambitious in its ascent upward; Kim can still spot the two great stone winged boars that act like sentinels on either side of the front gates as the five of them leave the main path and veer to the northwest.

Trini half-covers a wild yawn with her hand, shaking her head a little. And Kim knows she gets up every morning for yoga, but it's still early to be about on a Sunday; eight o'clock or so. They've all missed playing as often as they were in the more mild months, though—the improving weather was too enticing, too tempting not to come out.

Zack yawns too, stretching his arms out above his head with a small groan and peering the arms of his new black practice robes fondly. "Gotta say, it's real nice not having to worry if these'll tear every time I move."

"So buzzed they fit, mate," Jason says, breath leaving his mouth in a swirling cloud and vanishing in the blueish dark. He raises his gloved hand to rub at the side of his face a bit, the action so gentle and familiar that Kim's lips quirk up at the sight.

They make their regular stop at the grounds shed to pick up the practice balls and Billy and Zack's preferred brooms, and Kim gives a tiny wave to Roderick and Rodina, there inanimate and still, as she carries the crate out with Trini.

Jason waves his wand to charm the crate to levitate just as the cold of the iron handle begins to poke through Kim's thin glove. He brings it trailing along behind them like a baby duckling, and they soon enter the concrete south tunnel that leads into the stadium, the fresh smell of wet grass mixed with mud becoming stronger as they go.

Billy leads them out onto the pitch, still sporting a few heavy stubborn snowdrifts here and there at the edges. The ancient wooden stands tower up around them on all sides, dark and damp and comforting, barring the gentle rolling breeze breathing over the grounds. Kim's eyes travel over them, tilting her head back a bit to peer at the sky as it goes about its morning without a care; a shifting ceiling slowly getting brighter as the minutes pass, announcing the sun's coming in a whisper.

The five of them make for the centre of the pitch at an angle, walking towards the mouth of the east tunnel as usual. Billy takes an old painters tarp out of his duffel and spreads it out with a _thwap_ , laying it on the grass to protect their things from getting wet, and Kim drops her bag, rolling her neck a bit to get the blood flowing through her muscles a bit better.

She watches as Trini takes her gramophone out and opens the case atop a particularly large splatter of long-dried blue paint, kneeling in front of it with Zack at her side. They begin to bicker in low voices, soon settling on a record that Zack seems _delighted_ about.

He withdraws it with a flourish and removes the sleeve, peering at the tracklist on the back for a moment before setting it up. ['Baby I'm Burnin''](https://open.spotify.com/track/2Asiem9O0YGuvvoAkz8aSq?si=w9yo0h_fTMKIPsWB5_f-QQ) by Dolly Parton starts to play, and Jason chuckles as he pulls his tattered red leather Quidditch gloves over the skintight pair he's already wearing.

Ever the country music fan, Billy gives a nod of approval from his place plopped down on the tarp, busy double-checking his boot laces. Trini shoves Zack and turns, walking towards midfield and holding the Quaffle in one hand, Beater's bat absent for today.

"What do you guys think?" she calls over her shoulder, tossing the Quaffle up in the air a few times.

"Me and you, Crazy Girl," Zack croons, sending her a brilliant smile.

Trini rolls her eyes. "Fine. But if you're singing the whole time I can't make any friendly fire guarantees."

Zack laughs. "Sure."

Having already holstered his wand, Jason's trying to tie his right glove up manually, growling and tugging at the laces with his teeth like an idiot. Kim scoffs under her breath, eyes softening in the twilight as she crosses the space between them.

She gently plucks the laces out of his mouth and finishes up for him, giving his hand a soft pat.

"Thanks," he breathes, and Kim smiles wide, adjusting his black skullcap so it covers his ears.

With that they follow Billy to the middle of the pitch. Trini and Zack are bickering again, so Kim waves her hand to increase the song's volume then swoops down to pick the Quaffle up from the grass at Trini's feet.

Jason and Billy mount their brooms and kick off, soaring up into the air, and Kim follows them. The crisp wind brushes over her face and soars past her ears, its shrill whistle dulled by the warm wool of her tight dark grey beanie. Kim never used to wear hats when she played—and expects she still won't during a regulation match—but it's _Trini's_.

There was only so long they could argue over it, after all. And Kim couldn't deny Trini's point—that staying warmer means she's less likely to fall ill or get a headache from the cold. Loathe as she is to admit it, not having that sharp pain in her ears when everything starts to warm up post-game is quite nice.

Jason cups one hand over the side of his mouth. "Coming up?" he calls, as Kim stops to hover next to him and Billy in the air.

A tiny Zack looks up at them from the ground and gives a thumbs up, ruffling Trini's own beanie spectacularly with a cackle that carries up to them before taking off. She fixes it and trails not far behind, and Kim tosses the Quaffle to her as soon as they get close enough.

"Ready?" Trini says, grinning at all four of them.

Kim urges her own broom to the side, turning to begin defending their hoops. "Let's go!"

.

Later that night—or early the next morning, rather—Kim's standing with Gregory wearing her beat-up waxed canvas rucksack, about to head outside for a swim. Earlier she'd looked out through the castle windows to see the thick layer of ice that covers the Great Lake beginning to ease back from the shoreline, nearing the end of its winter timeshare.

Kim had whooped softly at the sight; she usually breaks and parts the ice herself in the colder months, kept safe from any hypothermia concerns by charms. But there's something about being able to walk into the water without any effort, like it's welcoming her in.

Gregory has his nose in another book, _Arcadia_ this time. After they read it in Arithmancy, she thought he might like it.

And he seems to, if the little smile on his lips is any indication. He hums contentedly to himself, taking his glassless spectacles off his nose and letting them hang from the thin chain around his neck as he peers down at her. "Pleased you're back to going out at your usual time, Kim. Though I'm well aware that what it suggests about your sleep schedule is _ludicrous_."

Kim chuckles softly. "I prefer this. Nice not having to worry about chance encounters, besides."

He nods. "I say — were you to be confined indoors for the rest of your time here, I'd very much miss our conversations."

"I'd still find my way to you," she quips, tapping her heel against the wall a couple times. "Don't worry—I won't let you forget me."

"Of course," he replies softly, firelight dancing in his stone eyes. "So shall we set a password, or do you not intend to come back this way?"

Kim considers. "Not sure, but I reckon I'm due for a riddle anyway. Can't let my mind go now, can I?"

"As if it could ever," Gregory mutters, flashing a sly smile. He brings his hand up and brushes his fingers along the wall that hides the passage, and she mutters a soft word of thanks.

Kim steps towards the wall then hums to herself at an afterthought, turning back to face him. "I meant to ask — what was that name Maeve called you the other night?"

Gregory gives her a puzzled look. "Ah, _Leonchroí_...? It's an Irish term. Means Lionheart."

Kim nods slowly, wisps of a theory flitting through her mind. "Is that what you prefer to be called? I can switch, no problem."

He shrugs. "No matter. It's just the paintings and statues that address me by that title."

"That's... can I ask why?" Kim mutters, tilting her head. "I've read up a bit on you and—"

"Have you now?" Gregory interjects, eyes crinkling at the sides.

She shoves him a little; to her delight, he tips to the side theatrically. "Had to do my homework. But I haven't come across that term in association with you before? I don't think?"

Gregory inclines his head. "To explain its origins, I figure I'll have to finish that story I began with you a few months ago. About how my most famous potion came to be—are you still willing to hear it? Or perhaps another time?"

Kim smiles easily and jerks her head towards the passage. She walks through the wall and he follows a couple steps behind, twitching his fingers to have the familiar plush green sofa appear there on the landing, along with his own giant chair.

They both sit and Gregory sighs a little, playing with his hands. "I told you about the Healer partner of mine who began administering my potion to patients once it was complete, yes? How we dreamed it would be used across the country by muggle and magical Healers alike?"

Kim nods, shrugging her rucksack off. He hums and continues, "I will not go into that in depth, as it is a long and unsatisfying tale. But the brief of it is that we were... not entirely successful in our efforts. It got away from us, which is why I'm known now as the inventor of a potion that carries a nefarious reputation."

"You can tell me the rest if you're comfortable," Kim prompts softly.

Gregory meets her eyes for a few moments and sighs again. "All right. Well, we soon had many Healers using it successfully, and I began brewing large batches for distribution throughout the country. Years passed like that, and I suppose word eventually got to..." he trails off, frowning. "The power of suggestion the potion granted was lucrative, as you can imagine."

"Like, in that it could be used to influence people against their will?"

Gregory nods. "Yes, though I foolishly did not consider that at the start." He waves a hand weakly. "Eventually I was granted an audience with the King himself. There were wizards in his court who had heard about the potion, as I understand it. He trusted their advice, and we soon struck a deal where he would use his influence to distribute it for treatments in the muggle medical community. He seemed enthused and paid me handsomely to live at the castle and brew it." He pauses, voice getting quieter. "At the time, it was the greatest honour of my life."

His face changes then, the shadows cast by the torchlight catching it differently. "Looking back now, I see that it was... naïve of me not to properly consider the other ways in which it could be utilised. But the King was young and ambitious—he sought to use it as a weapon of war."

"Before I made that unfortunate discovery, I served as the Master of Potions in the King's court for some years," he says quietly. "And it may seem strange to you now that I did not follow up on how it was being used, with information as abundant in the modern day as it is. But I was so pleased that it was supposedly helping people that I did not even consider that there was an alternative."

Gregory sighs heavily. "During my time at the castle, it became necessary to teach some of the other wizards in the King's employ how to brew it, given the massive supply he demanded—all supposedly for medicinal use. Otherwise, the recipe remained a closely-guarded state secret."

"But whispers eventually reached me," he whispers, like he's admitting something shameful. "The King was indeed using it as a means of conquest, to make his foes and allies alike believe he was a fearsome leader and warrior. He was building a legend around himself that was entirely constructed. And I was devastated, of course—muggle hospitals were not common in my day, but the potion never even reached the ones that existed."

Kim clicks her tongue quietly, shaking her head, and Gregory gives her a sad smile. "I sought to stop it, but my pleas went unheeded. Soon enough, I was threatened by some of the wizards on the council to keep quiet. But I was terrified that the potion would be used to conquer _nations_ … the Young King was obsessed with war by that time, and was on a quest to obtain the recipe for Greek Fire—the alchemical potion used by the Byzantines to lay waste to entire ship fleets and armies. What's worse, I knew he was close, and that my potion would only aid in his efforts."

He pauses, the memories causing his eyes to glaze over. "So I decided on drastic action, to set out to tear down what I had carelessly helped build."

Kim's eyes widen, noting the defeated grief slipping between the spaces in his words.

"After careful planning, I destroyed all stores of the potion and modified the memories of the wizards who knew how to brew it," he says, and an attempt at a playful tone spins into his voice, though it rings hollow. "It was... quite the fuss. And as much as I am quite adept, I could not hold my own against an entire council who sought to use the Young King's success to further their own fortunes."

Gregory hesitates for a few moments. "One of them gravely injured me in a duel, and I was captured—the King was furious and threatened to have me executed. But he kept me alive in the hopes I could be convinced to continue working for him, given I ensured that I was the only remaining person who knew how to brew the potion. I was imprisoned until he passed, and with him went the directive to the wizard council to keep me alive. My wounds were grave, as I said, and well beyond what a muggle Healer could fix. I died there, in that cell."

Kim sighs heavily and grips his stone forearm.

After a few moments of silence, he pats her hand with his own. "Once he was gone from power, and given the potion and its use was a well-kept secret, the full extent of my involvement was never known outside of the King's most trusted council. But in their anger, they wished to disgrace me in revenge for what I had done."

"So yes," he says quietly, sadness evident in his eyes, "my name was slandered relentlessly. The story that came to be accepted was that my intentions were villainous and I'd obtained my wealth by trickery. Of course, I was not alive to refute their claims."

"From what I've learned since being in this statue form, the King became paranoid and controlling over the small supply that remained after I destroyed the main stores. He continued to utilise it to advance his military campaigns and spread tales of his greatness throughout the land." He pauses, frowning. "It's difficult to say just how much he used it during his reign, but he's known as the Lionheart even to this day."

"Wait..." Kim mutters, feeling something click in her mind. "The King you're talking about was Richard I? Richard the Lionheart?"

Gregory nods. "That's what he became known as, yes. The statues and paintings in the castle refer to me as Lionheart because I've told them the tale — Bowman Wright began calling me that instead, saying I deserved the name more than the King ever did. It stuck, though I've insisted many times that what I did does not deserve such commendation. I failed, after all."

Kim gasps softly, her suspicion from earlier nearly confirmed. "Greg... is your potion like, lime green? Tastes and smells _amazing_?"

He lets out a small chuckle. "It's different for everyone. As I've told you, the potion taps into the mind of the drinker and brings out the most euphoria-inducing stimuli, similar to Amortentia. It helps with ensuring that the suggestion takes root and remains after the effect wears off, because smell and taste are powerfully linked with memory."

Kim stares at him, mouth hanging open in disbelief. Because she's more than familiar with that part, having taken the potion herself—it's the cornerstone of the suicidal ideation treatment administered at St. Mungo's.

"They... they use your potion in hospitals," she says quietly, still stunned. "For the purpose you intended."

"I— sincerely?" he says, staring into her eyes. "I was under the impression that it never was brought into that setting. I died with nefarious applications being the only widespread use."

"But you said there were Healers you trusted that used it, right?" Kim asks, brow furrowing. "And that one bloke who you were fond of especially?" She pauses, considering. "Wait, how did you... er—" she stops, trying to phrase.

Gregory just waits, watching her patiently.

"How did you come to be this way?" she asks softly, after a few moments. "My understanding is that it's usually the person a statue's based on who has to do the enchanting, in order to properly reflect their consciousness. If they die before they can, it's a team of historians, or someone who was close to them when they were alive."

Gregory nods. "It was Taliesin," he breathes, the name leaving his lips almost hesitantly, though his tone is nothing less than adoring. "The same Healer who initially tried to treat my brother-in-law and helped me test the potion. We grew to become..." he trails off, a quiet smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. "We became very close. He's the one who taught me about myself, as strange at that sounds. Who I was when I was alive."

Kim listens in silence, feeling like a warmth has enveloped her heart; touched by him sharing this clearly cherished information with her.

"But if the potion is used in hospitals today," he continues slowly, "it must have happened after I was placed here in the castle."

"I can look it up?" she tries, brow furrowing. "Like, even if it wasn't popularly applied that way before... that happens with medicines all the time, right? Sometimes they can be used for multiple purposes."

"So he eventually got it there," Gregory mutters, as if to himself. Clear awe colouring his voice. "He... _did_ it after all. This pleases me greatly to hear, Kim."

"I know because they used it on me," Kim admits quietly, and his eyes soften. "When I had my stay in the hospital over Easter last year, after everything happened." He nods solemnly, and she sighs. "That potion— _your_ potion—is what they use, plus a mess of other more qualitative treatments and therapies to help it stick."

Her eyebrows shoot up, remembering. "I'm such an idiot. They even call the potion 'The Lionheart'! The entire mental health ward is named for it!"

"After the King?" Gregory asks, curious.

Kim considers for a few moments, then shakes her head slowly. "I don't think so? I can't remember seeing anything about Richard I on the walls." He looks confused, so she hums and explains, "If a ward is named after someone, there's usually a painting or photograph of them next to the plaque."

"Perhaps it was named for the time period in which the potion was invented," Gregory muses, letting out a small sad chuckle. "I suppose they couldn't call it the _Unctuous Unction_ ward, could they?"

Kim opens her mouth but Gregory holds up a quick hand. "I'm not looking for credit, truly," he mutters, undeniably sincere. "It stands to reason that if the world is under the impression I created the potion with malicious intentions, they would not want to bring my name into it. For all anyone knows, its ability to alleviate melancholy and treat suicidal ideation is purely accidental."

"But it's _not_ , Greg," Kim says insistently, squeezing his hand. "Gods, I can't believe I didn't make the connection before."

Gregory hums softly, the sound deep and melodic. "If it's being used in an official Healer setting, that's the best news I could ever hope for. Credit or not, my potion is helping people—" his voice trembles and he pauses abruptly, clearing his throat. "This is all I ever wanted. I cannot adequately express just how much joy you've brought me by telling me this."

"You saved my life," Kim breathes, voice barely audible. She dries her eyes carefully with her sleeve, taking a deep breath in and out before letting out a wet chuckle. "That's _twice_ you've done that now, you know. Make it three and it's a solid number!"

He pats her forearm gently. "As I've said before, it was you who took the steps to save yourself. But I am always here for you, and it has been my utmost honour to help, directly or not. I would do it a hundred times over."

Kim wipes at an escaping tear and smiles at him, feeling the warmth of it buzzing through her whole body.

Gregory returns it, his great stone brow furrowing once before he laughs, and brightly this time. "Though I _must_ say, the thought of your life being in peril for even a third time fills me with a terrible dread. Let us try not to hit any magical number milestones in the near future, yes?"

Kim lets out a happy scoff, nodding. "Deal."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title track is 'the origin of love' from the hedwig & the angry inch OCR.
> 
> \---
> 
> welcome to another chapter! to those of you who got an update notification on the 11th, that's my bad. posted it on accident before it was done... gives a bit of insight into how scatterbrained I've been. my apologies!
> 
> but yes. february has arrived in-universe, and we're moving slowly through the main canon plot, approaching the second triwizard task. the kids are getting closer to figuring out all the animagus stuff in the meantime. still a thousand things that could go wrong down the line, mind. as I keep saying! but progress is happening.
> 
> some quidditch there, just showing how _normal_ it's become for the five main kids in their day-to-day. little bits like that, including kim and trini having argued about staying warm during games, just point to how comfortable they've got with each other by now. remember how trini gave kim her scarf back in november too, when they went down to watch the sunrise together. harkens back to a core part of trini's characterisation, where she very much has that Take Care Of People instinct. the last chapter shed more light on that!
> 
> next! I talked about this kim and greg stuff a few months ago, when we got the first big bit of his backstory, and mentioned that kim would be asking him about the 'lionheart' name after she heard it from maeve. again, his backstory has been written around and within the canon info we get on him—we know he was in Richard I's court, and that his potion was invented around that time. its application in suicidal ideation treatment is something I've entirely written for this story, given its original intended use was based in his desire to help his brother in law. & note greg didn't give it the Unctuous Unction name—it became known as that after he died.
> 
> the discussion between the two of them is also coupled with kim realising just HOW MUCH greg has done for her, even indirectly. she knows he saved her life the night of the amanda incident, but his potion also put her on the proper track to recovery. that's HUGE. I adore their relationship, and they're incredibly special to one another.
> 
> that bit about greg not KNOWING that his potion is being used in modern day magical hospitals also is understandable, as kim said—oftentimes in the real world, medications are used for purposes beyond their original intention. an easy example of this is certain kinds of antidepressants, some of which are applied in a wide variety of other treatments. medical development is super cool!
> 
> but yes. note richard I in this context became known as the lionheart by sneaky means. when I was originally developing greg as a character and figuring out his backstory, I did a whole lot of research into Richard I and his conquests! a big thing in this story—and an important note to keep in mind about life—is that documented human history is rarely straightforward or accurate; it's written by the victors, the conquerors, the colonisers. it is by no means a cut and dry or 'real' account of the things that actually occurred a large portion of the time.
> 
> a little historical nugget there, too, about 'greek fire' which indeed was a real BANANAS alchemical compound used to lay waste to entire armies. it's a strange gap in our modern historical accounts, given the recipe and makeup has been lost to time. bit of a mythical conundrum even with our modern science lens, and ties into magic nicely in that respect. not everything is as it seems, and finding alternative explanations for the unsolved mysteries of the universe via MAGIC is one of my favourite things about writing a story like this.
> 
> but yeah — greg's healer partner taliesin (who... note! the two of them had a long-term Bromance in the gay way, if that wasn't implied heavily enough) was the person who enchanted his statue at hogwarts, entrusted to bring greg to life in stone form. like kim said, it's usually the person themselves who does the enchanting, someone who was very close to them when they were alive, or a team of well-informed researchers. kind of like the paintings in the castle. you're essentially instilling an object with a reflection of a real person's consciousness. taliesin used a ton of greg's personal records in addition, too, like journals, lab diaries, his pensieve etc. to give greg's statue 'memories'.
> 
> but the statues and paintings, of course, take on a life of their own once they're enchanted. greg's made new memories and relationships in the time he's been in stone form, as we know (with kim especially!).
> 
> \---
> 
> think that's it! thanks for reading, everyone. I can't tell you enough how pleased I am that you're keeping with this story! this fic means so much to me, and I'm so happy you guys are invested too. comments are appreciated as always! 
> 
> until next time, and please take care of yourselves <3


	55. Then Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/7mcGVnsSHiNCKl1kAjqPcW?si=fiYaxFkmQ2aNfkfgV7npiw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The Great Hall is chattering around them on Wednesday morning, the school busy making its way through breakfast. Sat at the Gryffindor table with Kim and the boys, Trini pokes her gums a bit with her tongue, at a sore spot where her retainer's been rubbing lately.

"Canker, Crazy Girl?" Zack asks, meeting her gaze across the table.

Trini shakes her head. "Nah, just a bit of a cut."

Billy looks up from his book as Zack flashes a grimace. "Oh! Trini, that might actually be a wise..." he trails off, humming. "Perhaps we should all start on a Vitamin C regimen in order to avoid canker sores in leading up to the—" he lowers his voice a bit, "first stage?"

Jason nods. "Don't want the leaves to sting or none, sure."

"The less we have to worry about mouth-wise, the better," Billy says quietly, shrugging one shoulder.

All at once, Trini has a sudden idea sweep through her mind. She smacks the table lightly, eyes widening. "Guys—" she blurts out, then falls silent. Thinking quick.

Kim flips a page of her _Daily Prophet_ and looks over with an eyebrow raised, tipping into Trini's shoulder gently.

Trini frowns down at her plate, the thought blinking in her mind like a traffic signal. "Okay, we agreed that a Sticking Charm probably isn't the best idea, right?"

"I still maintain it might cause unpredictable side effects with the magic," Billy says, nodding once. "We can't afford to cut corners and risk altering or spoiling the leaves."

Zack throws his hands up in the air. "But _again_ , mate... what if we swallow them while we're sleeping on accident?"

"Do you really reckon that might happen?" Kim asks. "Figured you were joking."

"Not all of us're light sleepers, Kimbo."

"Well aware. With snores like yours..." Jason quips, and Zack jabs him in the ribs with a laugh.

Jason swats at Zack's wrist absentmindedly, looking contemplative for a moment. "I mean, if one of us messes up we've agreed it's no big, yeah? We all start over. That'll just have to be—"

Trini holds her hand up and interjects, "Sure—we do this together or not at all." The other four nod in easy agreement. "But if we can control for factors like this, that's the most ideal, isn't it?"

Billy waits for a few seconds, and when it's apparent she's not about to continue, he tilts his head a little. "Do you have something in mind?"

Trini hums. "Just a thought. There're non-magical ways to make things easier for us."

"Like what?" Jason asks.

"You lot have to promise you're not gonna laugh—"

Zack grins. "No can do. But I'll try."

Trini shoves him on the shoulder and he goes tilting to the side dramatically. "Idiot," she mutters. "Alright, I... you know how I've a little gap in my front teeth?"

With an exaggerated squint, Zack leans across the table as if trying to get a better look. She keeps her mouth firmly closed, glaring, but he clearly knows what she's on about. "If I did ever notice, I'd say it's charming."

"That's nice," Trini grumbles, then sighs lightly. "Well it used to be bigger, right? I wear a... it's a thing muggles use to help straighten out teeth. You wear it to bed. Sort of like a brace in concept."

"And it helps align them better?" Billy asks.

Trini nods. "I can show you, B. But I reckon we could make copies? Fit one for each of us. If we wear them for the whole month and don't take them out at all, it'll help ensure we don't swallow the leaves on accident when we're sleeping, or when we're eating and stuff."

Kim runs her tongue over her teeth. "Can people see it when you're talking?"

"Normally, yeah," Trini replies. "But I figure we can make some alterations. Can be... kind of like a cage?"

"So the leaves will still be exposed to our saliva proper," Billy says quietly, and Trini hums. "That sounds like an ideal solution, Trini." He opens his notebook to a blank page and holds it out over a tray of assorted sweet rolls, along with a sharpened pencil. "Could you sketch it out a bit? Just so I can get an idea?"

Trini moves her half-finished piece of toast aside and takes the notebook and pencil, starting to outline a rough sketch, hand moving fast. An image begins to form and she feels Kim's eyes on her without looking over, something like a warmth stirring between the two of them that she tries not to think too hard about.

"Mine's worn on my top teeth—" Trini mutters, as she continues to draw, "so usually, it has a plastic bit that goes flush with the roof of my mouth and a wire that goes over my front teeth. But we aren't using them for alignment, so we can adjust to make the wire go over the top of our gums... or just fashion little anchors for our back teeth instead, plus another two for everyone's canines to be safe?"

She hands the notebook and pencil back over to Billy. "So no, it won't be super visible. People might catch a glimpse of the wires but I don't think anyone'd ask twice."

Zack flashes his canines with a little growl and Trini rolls her eyes.

"So it's like a gum shield?" Kim says, peering at the page as Billy brings the book back towards himself. Referencing the mouth guards they use for Quidditch, mainly there to protect from breaking their teeth or biting down on their own tongues.

Trini nods. "Yeah, but those're entirely rubber right? Similar kind of deal though. We can use spells to get them to form to our mouths in the same way. As long as we don't _enchant_ them, I reckon they'd be safe to use along with the leaves."

"Might need your help with this, Kim," Billy murmurs, staring at the drawing and making a few notes in the page margins. "Transfiguration is your area of expertise."

Kim scoffs. "I'm sure you'd do great. But I totally can if you'd be more comfortable."

.

Two nights later they're all sat in the Restricted Section again, the library silent save for the soft _creaks_ of the towering stacks breathing in the dark around them. Certainly coming close to being done with their Animagus research, getting everything in final order; they're fitting their retainers tonight then finalising what they can before Kim writes her mum proper with news of their plan.

Drawing her wand out of her forearm holster, Kim tips to the side to take Trini's hand carefully.

When Trini gives her a questioning look Kim just hums, turning her hand over gently and tapping her palm. She whispers the sterilising spell her mum taught her, then does the same with Trini's other hand.

Trini peers at her hands for a few quiet moments and smiles, the look so unbridled in its fondness that Kim feels goosebumps erupt all over her arms. She sends up a little thank-you to Past Kim for choosing to wear a crewneck this evening before doing the same with her own hands, then each of the boys in turn.

When Kim's finished, hands tingling a little from the spell, Billy brings five little rough canvas bags out of his rucksack and hands them around. She takes hers with a small smile, watching as he produces a roll of light brown leather and places it in the centre of their little circle. With a flick of his wand it unfurls itself, opening up onto the glossy hardwood floor to reveal a handful of tools: a pair of wire-cutters, sturdy metal file, and a set of needle nose pliers among them.

Kim plucks her retainer out of the bag and peers at it curiously—it's a small contraption made of thin wire and fitted with a piece of mesh window screen, forming a shape that mimicks the concave plastic structure of Trini's retainer.

They'd all spent part of their regular shared study period in the library two days ago making five copies and fiddling around. Kim helped to shape each of them at Billy's request, but he's clearly made a few additions since: little bits of rubber are fitted to the wire and mesh here and there, likely to make them more comfortable to wear.

The five of them scoot closer together and Billy taps each of the retainers with his wand, muttering. Kim's heats up against her fingers, though not uncomfortably, and she carefully places it into her mouth.

Helped by the spell, she pushes on it a bit to bend the thin metal, forming it snug to the roof of her mouth and fixing the two little added loops to align with and anchor on her top canines.

Kim swipes her tongue over the metal experimentally; it's not uncomfortable and doesn't seem to be pushing too hard against anything. Across from her, Jason's got both of his hands in his mouth and is making little grumbling noises; having apparently formed his own already, Billy takes out a small mirror and holds it in front of Jason to help.

"Fanks," Jason mutters, eyeing his reflection with a furrowed brow.

Trini's seemingly got hers in just fine, and Zack struggles with his for another moment before moving his jaw side to side experimentally. With a hum, he removes his retainer and grabs Billy's metal file, smoothing a spot down before popping it back in.

He grins wide at Kim then, flashing all of his teeth spectacularly. The little loops around the base of his canines are visible, silver wire against the white, but otherwise, there's no other way to tell it's there.

Jason's opening and closing his mouth like a fish, puffing out his cheeks, and when he finally seems satisfied, he smiles wide as well. "Trini, this was a great idea."

Trini inclines her head. "Teamwork, lads."

.

A couple hours later they're back to researching, the retainers safely stored in each of their bags, when Billy lets out a heavy, frustrated sigh.

"I think I've found our first big problem."

Kim looks up from her book, seeing him there sitting up against the shelf, frowning down at his own reading.

"And you mentioned this a few weeks ago when we started, Zack," Billy continues, eyes flying over a page. "But the pupa of the Death's Head Hawkmoth is... exceedingly difficult to procure."

Zack nods, grimacing. "Yeah, I did a bit of reading—the moths have a very small window in terms of when they migrate and populate annually. I'm... sure we'll figure it out, but it seems next to impossible to get one chrysalis, let alone _five_."

Billy sighs. "That's my point: the supply is so limited that priority's given to registered Potioneers and academic institutions. We could try to write a shop and see if we can procure some, but in all likelihood..." he trails off, frowning at Zack.

"What?" Jason asks, looking between them.

Billy hesitates and makes a defeated hand gesture.

Zack hums then explains, "They aren't native to the UK, but the ones that migrate here in the late summer sometimes get busy on vacation. That's where the majority of the chrysalis supply comes from." He pauses, sighing again. "So given they pupate best in the warmer months, most of the annual British supply has _already_ been harvested and distributed for this year. Next big one won't be 'til summer."

"That said, I read that some of the moths get it on a bit behind schedule and have babies well into the fall," he continues, brow twitching. "In those cases, the little ones'll burrow down then pop out when it's warmer. The climate here isn't ideal, so not many of that group survives, but there _is_ a small new stock that comes 'round in the spring."

"Cutting it close with end of term for us," Jason mutters, and everyone nods.

"To be sure, even if we were right in the main harvesting season there's no guarantee we would be able to get them," Billy says softly. "Again, priority is given to accredited institutions or professionals."

Trini tips her head. "So... are you two saying we're gonna have to wait until the summer?"

Billy makes a half-hearted affirmative noise, but Zack holds up his hand. "Maybe not," he says, and Billy peers at him, curious. "It'd certainly seem that way, but apparently a hearty bunch of them take an annual trip to ol' Blighty in the _earlier_ summer, too. The Lizard specifically is a migratory hotspot."

"The Lizard... like, the peninsula in Cornwall?" Kim asks, frowning.

Zack nods. "Muggle hobbyists like to go out there and see them. So there's some that come out of there, and I figure the muggles might sell 'em for cheap? In the magical market harvesting is super controlled. They're mad valuable as potions ingredients."

"How valuable?" Trini asks.

"More than we can afford," Zack answers quietly, meeting Trini's eyes with a pointed look. "But what I mean to say in telling you guys about the Lizard is this — I wrote to some muggle hobby shops down that way as soon as we figured out that we each needed a chrysalis."

Kim blinks as she listens, surprised.

Zack grimaces. "It's... a _huge_ long-shot, but I told them I was a teacher and wanted to show my class of kids what the chrysalis' look like. Even offered to go down there to make the purchase." Trini lets out a little laugh and Kim's eyes fall on her, clearly equally impressed at Zack's line of thinking. "Figured there might be some people out that way who breed 'em, or a few locals who have supply kicking around from last year."

Trini hums. "That's... brilliant, Z."

He shrugs, though he looks pleased with the sincerity in her tone. "I'm waiting on a quote. No idea if it's gonna be a few pence or a pile of gold, but I doubt I'm the first wizard to have the thought? So if it's as much as I reckon it's gonna be, we flat-out can't do this. But I'm sort of holding onto hope that some little shop down there might sell 'em for less."

Kim hums. It's certainly a long shot, but it's worth a try. If Zack's efforts don't pan out, though, they're going to have to come up with another solution.

The five of them sit in silence, all thinking hard.

"I suppose we _could_ wait until the summer?" Jason says, peering around at them all. "That's really not the worst thing."

Billy gives a sad little nod. "Short of going to Professor Snape and asking him to put in the order for us..." he says slowly, eyes focused on Kim's ancient gas lamp as it flickers between them all. "Which is a huge risk, given he will likely guess what they're for, I can't think of another viable way to obtain them."

Trini makes a soft noise of realisation under her breath, eyes widening. Kim meets her gaze right then, and they seem to have the same thought in tandem—

"Kim," Trini says quietly, "you thinking what I'm thinking?"

She gulps. "Reckon so." The boys watch them stare at each other, and Kim sighs heavily. "It'd be... _so_ stupid."

"So stupid," Trini agrees, a tiny mischievous grin appearing on her lips.

Kim runs a hand through her hair, shaking her head. "And ten times riskier than asking."

"Yeah."

There's another few moments of silence as they continue to stare at each other, and Zack bops his shoulder into Trini's. "Care to share with the class, ladies?"

Trini's eyes linger on Kim's before looking over at him to answer. "You know who'd almost certainly have a decent supply on hand? Right this moment?"

After a pause, Jason gasps softly. "You two _can't_ be serious."

And Billy and Zack are clearly still in the dark, now looking wildly between the three of them.

Kim sighs again and explains, "Snape. He's both a registered Potioneer and the Potions Master of an accredited academic institution—"

"Who keeps a fully-stocked private store cupboard," Trini adds, meeting Kim's eyes conspiratorially.

Billy frowns. "So you _do_ think we should ask him for some?"

It's Zack who shakes his head, looking uneasy but getting the gist. "They don't wanna _ask_ , B."

Billy blinks rapidly a couple times and makes an affronted noise. "No way. No way, absolutely not. Jason — we can't do that."

But Jason doesn't say anything, watching Kim with calculating eyes, a different light stirring there.

Trini huffs, removing her reading glasses and pinching at the bridge of her nose. "Z, we all appreciate the effort you made writing those shops, but..." her voice changes to something softer, almost timid, barely loud enough for Kim to hear, "you well know that in all likelihood you and I can't afford to buy them. Even if they're at a discount, mate."

Zack sighs. "I know. Just wanted to try, I guess. Even if it's only for this lot." He jerks his head, and Jason makes a disagreeing noise.

"Again," Jason says firmly, "we either do it together or not at all."

Trini puts a hand on Zack's forearm. "I love you for trying. But absent any of us winning the lottery, or encountering some unaware muggles, this Snape rubbish could be our only option." She pauses, peering around at all of them. "And listen — this might just be where we stop all of this. Straight up. I don't want anyone," she looks at Billy kindly, "to feel pressured into something that they feel crosses a line or whatever."

Billy stares at his knees in silence, contemplating.

Kim hums. "Though... if it makes a difference, I can be the one who does it—"

"Same," Trini mutters, nodding at her once.

A flood of happy warmth runs through Kim at the solidarity, and she smiles. "Okay — _we_ can be the ones who do it," she amends, looking to the boys. "Better in pairs, anyway. So if you lot don't want to have your hands in it, that's totally cool. Trin and I will get them."

Billy peers up at her. "I sincerely appreciate that line of thinking from the both of you, but to be clear: I don't have any moral misgivings with the idea. It's more the risk of expulsion."

"I mean, that's understandable," Trini deadpans.

"Does seem a shame though, to stop here," Billy says slowly. "We nearly have everything else figured out."

Jason hums. "Well... if you're alright with the method, then I'll get them."

"Trin and I are capable," Kim says, tone unimpressed but playful.

"I know," Jason replies, smiling. "But I'm rubbish with keeping a straight face, in't I? If we do this, it'll be as a team, and we'll need lookouts." He jerks his head in Billy's direction. "You can sit out, mate. But the rest have to be ready to distract or stall — you girls are each better individually at that than the three of us blokes combined."

It seems a bit flimsy, but he has a point.

Kim meets Trini's eyes, who shrugs.

"First off, I'm offended," Zack quips, grinning. "I'm excellent with making shit up on the spot."

Trini smirks. "Truly. It's a lifestyle," she says, and Zack gives her a fist bump.

"Second," Zack continues, looking at Jason, "it _should_ be a pair—Kimbo's right on the buddy system bit. And I love you bud, but you right well won't be able to tell a chrysalis from the other hundreds of scary things dear old Slimey stores in there."

Kim considers this. "Have either of you ever been in his office though?"

"Once," Jason answers.

Zack shrugs. "Reckon I can figure it out—"

Billy pats Zack's forearm. "I've been in Professor Snape's office _and_ in his storage cupboard. I know the system he uses to organise his ingredients because I've seen it. And I can pick out the chrysalis' just as well as you."

Everyone stares at him, confused.

"Now _you_ wanna do it?" Trini asks, chuckling.

"If Jason is not ideal when it comes to improvising, then I am far worse," Billy says, smiling at her. "And Zack makes a good point—we should play to our strengths, and you three can talk your way out of most things."

Zack puffs out his chest like an overgrown bird. Trini and Kim meet each other's eyes again, laughing lightly.

Billy shrugs. "We've been saying this is a team effort since the start, and not participating doesn't sit right with me, anyway." He pauses. "Jason, if you're okay with it, then you and I will do it together."

Jason regards him for a few moments. "Alright," he says, rubbing at one side of his face roughly. "But we need a _solid_ plan."

"And we've gotta figure out when to do it," Zack adds, furrowing his brow. "Given how rare these things are, it makes the most sense to wait after the smaller harvest in spring, I reckon? Better chance of there being more if Snape's depleted his stores at all. Worst thing'd be getting in there and only finding like, two or something."

"Good point," Kim mutters.

"That might be a reason to move up the timeline," Jason says slowly. "Begin the rest as early as possible to account for mess-ups, right? We don't need the chrysalis' until the second stage, but there has to be a full month before that with the leaves..."

Zack nods. "So not the 17th of March, then. We'd start..." he trails off, tipping to the side and squinting at his notes.

"15th of February," Billy supplies quietly, tapping a finger on his moon charts. "Roughly a week and a half from now."

"Jesus," Trini murmurs.

Jason frowns. "You lot reckon we'll be ready by then?"

Trini hums, though she looks apprehensive. "I think so? We only need the Mandrake leaves on that day. Have until the next full moon to get the other ingredients."

"So we need to hit Snape's office sometime from mid February to mid March," Kim says, brow twitching. "Zack, when you say the smaller group comes out in the spring, when exactly do you mean?"

Zack flips backwards in his worn out notebook, reading quickly. "Whenever it gets warm, seems like. Depends on the year."

"Bit of a gamble," Jason mutters. "But we might as well hold out as long as we can, just in case some more come in...?"

Billy nods. "I think that's logical. Plus, if Professor Snape's office was already burgled recently—" he jerks his head at Kim, who hums, "waiting until he's less on guard would also be wise."

Trini tips her head back, eyes widening. "So we're actually doing this?"

Kim laughs. "It was _your_ idea—"

"You've _just_ as much responsibility for it as I do—"

"I'd argue you prompted me—"

"Kids," Jason interjects, smiling. "You are equally at fault for the mischief. But this is all of us risking our arses. Let's hope it pays off."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'then again' by half moon run.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO WE A BIT LATE I KNOW! I took a very much needed week off. mostly cause... guys, I've been emotionally COMPROMISED BY SHE-RA, okay??? if you haven't seen it please do yourself a favour and watch it. one of the most expertly constructed narratives I've ever seen and like... I can't give it high enough praise. it's on netflix under 'she-ra and the princesses of power'. try to avoid spoilers if you can, though I wouldn't usually care much about that kind of thing. BUT FOR THIS... TRUST MEEEE.
> 
> so yes. back to our kids! this chapter is entirely animagus-related stuff. we're really getting there & the rangers have moved their timeline up. gonna be trying to start the process very soon.
> 
> that little bit with the retainers is a play on becky g being the person who played trini in the 2017 film, aka who she looks like in this fic. :) so trini had her little tooth gap when she was younger! adorable baby! and though teeth alignment stuff/sizing can be fixed by magic (per our lord and saviour hermione granger in HP book four) my reasoning for trini having a muggle retainer is that a) she's from a mostly muggle background and b) she likely didn't think it was that big of a deal/didn't want to go to a healer to fix it. I'm sure her dad could've managed the spell, but from what we see in canon with mrs weasley... though she's a formidable witch, she can only do like, rudimentary-level healing spells. that's about it. so for safety etc, it'd make sense that trini's dad (or her mum, when she was around) likely wouldn't do it personally.
> 
> but yeah, so the modified retainers come out kind of like thin mesh cages. the leaves go up against the roof of each of their mouths, then the retainer will go over top to sandwich it in place. billy has like, all KINDS of little bits and bobs in his dorm (in a whole separate trunk), stuff he uses for experiments and projects etc. so him having a bunch of different tools and other supplies on hand makes sense, here. he had a good chunk of window screen mesh laying around in his supplies and fitted a small square of it to the top of each retainer. that way, saliva can still get through but hopefully they wont have a ton of problems with food sticking. SORRY FOR THE DETAIL I KNOW IT'S KIND OF ICK BUT THERE YA GO. 
> 
> now, per the death's head hawkmoth chrysalis stuff -- all of that is true to real life, in terms of migration patterns and things. when looking into the ingredients for the potion initially that was legitimately something that came up and I was like... oh no. how they gonna get these?
> 
> SO YES! WE HAVE A BIT OF A HEIST PLAN BEGINNING TO FORM! GONNA BE SOME EXCITING TROUBLEMAKING STUFF COMING UP.
> 
> fun fact: the one time jason had been in snape's office, and why billy knows his storage system etc. = because the two of them were IN THERE together cleaning for the detention where they met! in first year! :)
> 
> note there will be a couple tiny time jumps throughout the next few chapters, mainly of a couple weeks here and there. just because stuff is gearing up. and like I've said before, JKR does time jumps quite frequently. sometimes spanning a couple months in the space of a chapter or a few paragraphs.
> 
> \---
> 
> think that's it for this update! again, my bad on being late but this is the FIRST time since I started posting this thing that I've taken a break! which is actually super rad and I'm PROUD OF MYSELF. hope everyone's cool. if there are any typos etc my apologies in advance but we should be in the clear, I think. I partially needed a break cause life is currently nuts, too, yaknow? don't know where my one (1) braincell is these days but I sure as heck do not have it!
> 
> next time, we're continuing through february in our regular plot things. reminder kim's birthday is on the 14th, and as discussed, they're gonna try to begin the animagus stuff the following evening. big things shaping up so get excited! in regards to proper trimberly interactions, we'll be getting more in the next few updates. but look forward to a REALLY INTERESTING hogsmeade night coming up in that regard. per canon, it's in early march fic-wise (again, we're in early feb now). only a few chapters away!
> 
> thanks to you all for reading as always. comments are intensely appreciated, and I hope you're doing well & keeping safe <3


	56. Pink Moon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/16qzGrIMWoxerw2gnW0zuv?si=Y0aa-cGxRNez8XKapSeD1Q). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

Just over a week later, Kim's making her way up to breakfast on the morning of her birthday with Tommy chirping like a bird around her. Unable to stop smiling, she scoffs lightly for the umpteenth time as they walk into the Great Hall. It's certainly earlier than Tommy would usually be awake—still an hour and a half or so until the bell—but the House tables are relatively populated and buzzing already, slowly filling up.

"Sit, sit," Rose says, making a sweeping gesture towards the end of the Slytherin table with a wide grin. 

Kim rolls her eyes and obliges, though she quickly peers about for any sign of Jason or the others. They don't seem to be around, not arrived yet, and she shakes herself a little.

_You'll just seem them later. Not a big deal._

It's okay if they didn't remember. She hasn't been a huge fan of her own birthday in recent years, anyway. Not after everything.

She takes a deep breath in and out and smiles up at Tommy, who pats her shoulder once fondly before zooming back out through the doors without explanation. Kim watches her go with an eyebrow raised; she must've forgot something back in the dorm.

"So, how you feeling?" Daphne asks, plopping down to sit beside Tracey immediately across the table. They're both smiling warmly at her, Rose still standing in the aisle at her back.

"No grey hair yet," Kim chimes, reaching for the coffee pot and beginning to pour herself a mug. "Figure that's a win."

 _CRACK_.

The sudden sound ricochets through the Hall like a firework and Kim's eyebrows shoot up, eyes drawn towards the doors—

And all at once _beaming,_ Kim laughs lightly to herself in disbelief.

Because Jason, Tommy, Billy, Trini, and Zack are no less than parading in, all decked out in ridiculous birthday decorations: Jason has a giant party hat perched atop his ever-perfect hair, Tommy's wearing a massive tangle of colourful ribbons as a necklace, Billy's waving streamers with both hands, Zack's _entire_ face is painted half green half pink, and Trini has a noisemaker between her teeth like a tobacco pipe, carrying a sheet of what looks like silver reflective wrapping paper draped over one elbow.

Trini's also holding something small and circular, and she claps her hands together once to make another resounding _CRACK_ echo through the hall. A large square cake precedes Jason and Tommy, alight with two sparklers that are flickering merrily with small _pops_ and _hisses_.

Kim watches wide-eyed as they all come to stop and deposit the cake in front of her. She stares down at it with her knee bouncing under the table, vision blurring slightly; after a few deliberate blinks, the words written atop the cake in neon pink icing glitter clearly back at her: 'Happy Birthday Kimcam!'

" _Guys..._ " Kim mutters, shaking her head and smiling so involuntarily that she doesn't even think to try and hold it back.

"HAPPIEST OF BIRTHDAYS TO OUR GIRL!" Tommy yells, craning her head back and addressing the enchanted, clear blue ceiling. A few people watch on, though not with looks of vitriol or annoyance. It's just... ease, pleasant amusement.

Kim feels a warm hand on her shoulder and then a gentle squeeze, knowing somehow it's Trini without even looking up.

"Happy Birthday," Trini says softly, draping the sheet of wrapping paper around Kim's shoulders like a cape, the crinkle of the material whispering to her over the fizzy sound of the sparklers still burning strong atop the cake.

With a little twist Kim looks up, watching Trini squint as she ties the makeshift ribbon fastener at her collarbone to keep the cape in place. After a little pat, she finally meets Kim's eyes with a brilliant, entirely unbridled smile.

Jason and Tommy sit on either side of her then, each taking one of her hands and tipping warmly into her shoulders.

"HAPPYYYYY BIRTHDAYYYYYYY..." Zack starts, and everyone in the immediate vicinity—Tommy, Jason, Billy, Trini, Rose, Daphne, Tracey, Terence, Adrian, and all of Tommy's friends among them—join in at once, singing the song loudly without care.

And Kim just sits there, soon bringing her and Tommy's interlinked hands up to her face to hide her massive grin. As they go through the tune the sparklers continue to burn down, and once they're about halfway done there's a _puff_ — two little plumes of pink and green smoke materialise atop the cake in their place, dissipating after a couple moments to reveal fifteen candles blazing there.

Everyone finishes the song and Kim feels Trini's hand on her shoulder again, thumb stroking back and forth a few times.

"Make a wish, love," Jason whispers, kissing the side of her head.

Kim stares at the cake, unable to adequately voice the potent, overflowing sense of grateful awe running through her whole body. And in the space between those seconds, she wishes for nothing more than this: to be surrounded by people who love her so loudly, so without apology.

Ptero stirs around her neck and brushes her nape gently with his tail, and she quickly wipes at one of her teary eyes. After a deep breath in Kim blows the candles out, Tommy helping out on the last with a silly grin.

Zack sits down on the bench beside Jason and produces a blunt knife, pulling the cake towards himself and beginning to divide it up carefully. Trini assists, reaching out to catch the slices on small plates as he carves them.

Trini places the first piece in front of Kim with a silly flourish, then starts to pass the rest out. There's more than enough to go around, and as everyone starts to dig in and chat happily, Jason and Tommy lean into each of her shoulders at the same time, like they'd rehearsed it.

Tommy shifts her weight a bit to dig into the pocket of her robes, bringing out a small flat black box no bigger than Kim's palm.

"From the both of us," Jason says quietly, addressing the box on Kim's lap, voice low enough so only the three of them can hear. "We had it made. You've gotta be the first one to touch what's inside for the enchantment to calibrate."

Kim's brow twitches at his instructions, squeezing both of their hands once before letting go to run her fingers over the box. She looks up and peers around at the others, finding Trini standing across the table, now, with Zack and Billy sat in front of her. Kim meets each of their eyes, noting the knowing smiles on their faces.

Trini, Billy, and Zack resume their easy chatter then, like they're trying to give them privacy. With a deep, steadying breath in and out, Kim opens the box up, revealing what looks to be a gyroscope—or a Sneakoscope mechanism, she isn't sure—in a circular setting attached to a long heavy silver chain. The entire thing is made of shining silver, with a tiny purple gemstone set into the mechanism near the centre.

Picking it up like it's made of glass, Kim blinks tears back again and lays it out in her left palm. "This is gorgeous," she breathes.

The necklace begins to heat up in her hand, though not uncomfortably, and within a couple seconds the shining silver medallion is glowing like it's been sitting in a forge. Kim watches curiously as it lifts, hovering just above her palm as the mechanism in the centre begins to spin slowly.

It levitates there for another five seconds or so before stopping, going back to its regular gleaming silver and gently dropping back down. The medallion is an inch or so in diameter, and there seems to be something engraved into the circular border.

Kim can't entirely make it out at first, so she picks it up between her thumb and forefinger, bringing it closer to her face. When she finally reads it she gasps softly at the inscription: ' _I'll teach you how to jump on the wind's back, and then away we go._ '

A Peter Pan quote.

And Kim's tears begin escaping her eyes in earnest, running down her cheeks as she tips her head down a little. Jason reaches over and wipes at them with his thumb, touch warm and gentle, and produces Billy's magnifying glass from a pocket in his robes.

"We know it's tiny script," he murmurs, holding it out, "but they got it all on there."

"It's _beautiful_ ," Kim whispers, and Tommy squeezes her forearm.

"Had it made special," Tommy explains, lips right next to her ear.

"Billy helped us plan it out," Jason says, shoulder still flush with Kim's. "Then we met with the blokes at Dervish and Banges and commissioned them to craft it." He pauses, humming once as he tries to phrase. "It's sort of like... a Sneakoscope, but more individually calibrated?"

Tommy kisses her on the temple as Jason continues, "We wanted it to act as a bully alarm for you, see. So they worked up a blend of a few different bits of magic: it's got some protective enchantments in there as well as a modified Sneakoscope-type thing. If someone in the area means you harm, and only _you_ specifically, it'll hover above your chest and start spinning."

"If you'd prefer it to be less obvious, you can set it to vibrate, too," Tommy says, voice still quiet. "Figured it might be a pain in lessons, given Clarke and her gits're with you most of the time. But it's mainly for walking around the castle." She pauses, frowning a bit. "Also won't go off for Filch, innit, 'cause again — it's meant to detect people who'd do you _harm_ in some way, not people who are just... mind-numbing levels of annoying."

"How does that work?" Kim asks, eyes still glued to it, running a thumb over the silver.

"The idea is it'll warn you when those wankers are within a few corridors distance or so," Jason answers. "It'll spin faster or vibrate more the closer you get to them, just so you don't got to constantly be whipping your head 'round whenever you're walking."

Tommy nods. "And we're still gonna be with you at every opportunity. But we thought it might give you some peace of mind in the rare times when we can't be."

"Do you like it?" Jason asks, voice timid. "We tried to fit your style and considered a bracelet, but if you've got it tucked down your shirt it'll hang right by your heart. That way you can feel if it goes off, but nobody'll be able to see."

"I _love_ it," Kim breathes, turning to look at both of them. "Seriously." She reaches up and puts the chain around her neck, holding the medallion out over her chest.

"And we know you'll have P with you," Tommy says, brushing Kim's hair aside so the necklace can neatly settle underneath. "But we figured since it hangs lower it shouldn't be a problem for him? We just... wanted to be able to kind of be with you anywhere you go."

"Want it to help you feel safer," Jason mutters. "So you can just... _be_ , without having to look over your shoulder every moment."

"It's kind of a..." Tommy starts, then trails off, frowning. "We're sorry to give it to you, in a way? Like, we don't want you to feel like this is a knock at you, where we think you can't take care of yourself—"

"I know," Kim interjects gently. "This is so thoughtful of you both."

"We love you," Jason whispers, and Tommy kisses her temple again.

.

Later that night Kim's standing next to her four-poster bed, staring at the space of wall above her bedside table. Newly hanging there is a black and white poster in a heavy dark frame, depicting a man sitting in an armchair and being blown back by the sound coming from the speaker in front of him. A gift from Trini.

And Trini said it was only part of Kim's birthday gift—apparently the 'rest' of it will be coming her way over Easter break. She wouldn't explain just _why_ Kim had to wait (even after Kim tried to persuade her with a trademark pout), but the poster alone is perfect.

On her bedside table are both of Zack's gifts: a small intricately carved and painted wooden model of a _Nimbus 2001_ about the length of her hand, hovering on its own just above a little stand, and a beautiful wood mug, finished in a dark polish with snakes and vines twining around the whole thing.

Kim smiles to herself, playing with the sleeve of Billy's gift: a crisp black Montrose Magpies jumper, bearing the squad logo embroidered on the chest in silver thread. Tucked down the front of her shirt is the necklace Jason and Tommy gave her, quiet and still in the safety of her dorm.

Cluttered on her desk is an array of other things: a shining silver fountain pen from Rose, a box of varied Honeydukes sweets from Daphne and Tracey, and a framed wizarding photograph of Kim, Terence, and Adrian from her first year on the Quidditch team, all in their kit and smiling wide at the camera. Each of the boys' arms slung over her small shoulders.

A long letter from her mum lays open next to her gifts, along with a parcel of homemade sweets and the usual heavy drawstring bag of gold from her father. Courtesy of her grandparents, a fancy black leather bikers jacket is draped over her desk chair. Next to the unfolded letter—atop a thick comprehensive book full of information on Animagus magic—is the 'special' gift Kim had requested from her mum: five rings. They're for tomorrow night, for when the full moon has arrived proper and the five of them start up the Animagus process.

Kim hangs her necklace from a little peg protruding from the wall next to her four-poster and begins getting ready for bed, humming softly as she goes.

It doesn't take too long; she's soon drawing her emerald green bed curtains with a flick of her wrist and snuggling into her pillow with a happy sigh. Still smiling to herself even as she lays there in the dark, listening to the low hum of unintelligible conversation from Daphne and Tracey across the room.

Within minutes, she's fast asleep.

.

Late the following evening finds the five of them sitting close together by the shallows of the Black Lake, trying to keep each other warm as they stare out at the water and surrounding mountains.

There's a gentle breeze tonight, nearly unnoticeable save for when it decides to play with Kim's hair every once and awhile, or when it sporadically urges tiny timid waves to approach the shore before retreating back. The lake shimmers gently with it, though, the dark water full of stars and mirroring the clear sky above perfectly, parted down the middle with a wide streak of brilliant white light from the full moon that presides overhead.

Kim absentmindedly pulls at the plush blanket draped around her shoulders and looks down at the single Mandrake leaf in her hand. As ingredients, they're fairly easy to come by; a regular fixture in rudimentary potions kits and sold in shops all over. Looking at it now though, she feels like it's the rarest and most precious thing in the world.

From his place at the end of their little line, Jason exhales and shakes his legs out. "Ready, guys?"

They all look around at one another and nod.

"After three. Together..." Jason says, and all five of them take a deep breath.

_Here we go._

"One, two, _three_."

After they all count in unison, they each carefully place the leaves in their mouths.

Kim wets it with her tongue and pushes it to the roof of her mouth, followed by her custom-fitted wire retainer. In her pocket is the special birthday gift she received from her mum, though she hasn't shared it yet with the others: five stainless steel rings with a tiny lightning bolt engraving on each.

The rings were all charmed by her mother to be linked—when any of them are spun clockwise on the wearer's finger five times, the other four will emit a whistling sound like a kettle. The idea is for the rings to act as storm alarms, because once the five of them have gone through the first two steps of the Animagus process, their final directive is to wait for a lightning storm.

Given that Kim and Trini both live underneath the castle, they'd worried that they wouldn't hear a storm if it were to arrive at night. Realistically, any of them could sleep through it on accident. With the rings, everyone can be woken up if just one of them hears it.

When writing her mum about it initially, Kim told her that they were 'friendship rings' to be used to signal when the five of them would meet up outside of classes. It wasn't exactly a _lie_ , but with her mum fully in on the secret now, she'd playfully called Kim out in her birthday letter yesterday.

Billy smiles from Kim's right, tilting forwards to meet each of their eyes in turn. "Alright, guys," he says, voice a tad bit different due to the retainer in his mouth. He holds out his hand to Kim, who takes it gently.

The five of them link hands and sit there for a moment, looking at each other fondly and staring out at the lake. Each of them have a calendar in their dorms marking from today—the 15th of February—to the next full moon on the 17th of March. If something happens to go wrong, or the night of the 17th is cloudy, they'll have to begin again, with the next full moon charted for the 15th of April.

But they're all hopeful about the 17th being their final day with the leaves. St. Patrick's Day is supposed to be lucky, right?

_Is that a thing?_

Whatever happens, they've done their due diligence. Kim's mum has been exceedingly helpful with providing a go-ahead, and a pain of a month is ahead of them, but they're all confident that they're ready.

For now though, there's a leaf in Kim's mouth. It doesn't taste as bad as she was preparing herself for, actually.

Billy stands up, still holding both her and Jason's hands, and sighs contentedly. Kim follows and drops his hand gently, pulling five tiny rough canvas bags out from within her robes.

"I've a gift for each of you," Kim announces, taking her own ring out and slipping it onto her left index finger.

Zack fans himself. "Of _course_ I'll marry you. Been waiting for you to ask."

Kim rolls her eyes and the other three peer at her curiously. She passes out each of the little bags, all with the first letter of everyone's name written in permanent marker on the front. As she explains their purpose, Billy's face lights up.

"Kim, that's brilliant!" he says, clapping softly a few times.

She waves her hand at him. "It's what makes most sense, I think. My mum did the enchanting and tested them out. Reckon we shouldn't take them off at all until the entire process is done."

Jason nods, putting his own ring on and noticeably running his tongue over his wire retainer. "Right. And the only use between now and then'll be to signal a lightning storm, yeah? Once we've gone a month with the leaves and got past the second stage — is that cool with everyone?"

They all nod in unison and Kim speaks up again, "To turn the whistling off, rotate it five times anti-clockwise. I didn't want it to be _too_ easy to silence, just in case any of us who happen to be heavy sleepers try to turn them off unconsciously..." she throws a pointed look at Trini, eyes teasing.

Trini scoffs, smiling. "Excuse you."

At the smile, Kim's stomach does a backflip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'pink moon' by nick drake. a lovely song for this chapter, but also is a bit of fun playing on our pink rangers birthday + the full moon for the animagus startup!
> 
> \---
> 
> hello, all! welcome to the start of the animagus process, at long last! and kims birthday! a little celebration to start, with kim being surrounded by people who love her.
> 
> and jason and tommys gift continues the whole... me exploring the Cool Stuff you can make as knick-knacks, magic-wise. in terms of what the necklace medallion looks like, picture something ROUGHLY like [this](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/d0/40/f1/d040f163b2af77d0a73f4c8a0a99356b.jpg), except SILVER and smaller, and without the horseshoe 'U' shape base and stand. just that spinning mechanism set into a silver circle.
> 
> the mechanism design in the centre is a bit different than that picture too. it's separated in 3 parts in the same way, except with triangles instead of ovals (the triangles are meant to represent kim/jason/tommy + are strong magical shapes due to the #3). one of the triangle sections contains a purple gemstone set into the arm (amethyst, the birthstone for the month of february). the entire thing is designed to collapse flat, but if it's spinning, it'll levitate out a few inches from kim's chest if she's wearing it! 
> 
> the gemstone's meant to be an enchantment focus, which I've built out from HP canon via a) the fact that gryffindor's sword contains rubies set into the handle and b) wand cores are made of magical focus materials (both the centres with dragon heartstring, unicorn hair, or phoenix feathers in UK wandmaking, and the specific type of wood used). the idea is that the gemstone in kims necklace contains a good portion of the enchantments. in terms of magical instrument reasoning, it also helps to calibrate the magicks to the individual wearer, given kims birthday's in february. amethysts are thought to be a mind and emotion balancing gemstone besides, which serves to further the purpose of the enchantment — to detect people in kim's proximity who mean to upset that balance and do her harm.
> 
> note kims silver/cold motif as a character, in contrast to trinis gold/warm. you'll recall kims flask that her mum gave her is silver, slytherin as a house has green and silver as its colours, the handles in the dorms, lamps, chandeliers... all silver. even the parts of kims gramophones are silver (though just in colour for those). in terms of using it for this purpose enchantment-wise — in some folklore silver is a protective metal, thought to help keep monstrous things away or at bay (ie silver bullets). as a metal, silver is also self-sterilising. that's a bit of a point to kim and the redemptive nature of her character arc.
> 
> so yes. like tommy and jason explained, the idea is for the necklace to act as a bully alarm for kim. it's not a sneakoscope exactly, though the mechanisms contained within sneakoscopes LOOK at bit like gyroscopes by canon. it's calibrated to kim, so when it comes to people like fake moody it WON'T go off, because he doesn't mean kim harm specifically. where a sneakoscope generally detects all untrustworthy people in the vicinity, kims is a bit different. but that's kind of the base of the enchantment—I thought it might help you guys get a better picture/idea of what it is.
> 
> the peter pan quote is another ref to how important that story is to kim/jason/tommy. was their favourite thing as kids. more on that in the future.
> 
> and you'll note kims other gifts! trini gave her a framed print ('blown away' by steve steigman) and there's more to come at easter break. I WONDER WHY THAT COULD BE?!
> 
> zacks gift is in ref to that time he and kim were in the dungeons for their little one on one, in the chapter 'learn to be still'. you'll notice a pattern emerging RE zack's gift-giving — he makes them himself. remember the blanket he made for kim at christmas? that's a tiny bit of character socioeconomic class commentary, contrasted with kids like jason/tommy who can to do stuff like commission fancy necklaces. mind, THESE'RE ALL GIFTS OF EQUAL AWESOMENESS. just character differences.
> 
> kim requesting a lightning bolt engraving for the rings is cause the kids need a lightning storm to complete the animagus process. intro of a symbol that'll be a H U G E thing later on.
> 
> \---
> 
> very important note: in light of the widespread resistance actions taking place in the US + globally, I encourage you all to do your best to support in every way you can. if you can't physically, then donating to BLM, US bail funds, & contributing orgs if you have the money is a great option.
> 
> \+ 06/06/2020 RE jkr being an idiot: this fic'll always be entirely queer-friendly. if you're a terf, click the _fuck_ off my story.
> 
> sigh. happy pride month. thx for your readership, comments're wildly appreciated, and I hope you're staying safe.


	57. It's A Good Life If You Don't Weaken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/2rq1xsGCFXjdwJ85jdrfCW?si=MzIMVIMdQfS6VZL4xsbMUw). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

The day before the Second Triwizard Task finds Trini on her way up to the Astronomy Tower for her regular morning yoga, padding along through the castle that mostly has yet to wake around her. She's got her gramophone briefcase in hand, absentmindedly considering which album she's going to play when someone turns into her corridor up ahead.

Cedric's got his head down, hands in the pockets of his grey joggers. His hair is unkempt, having grown longer than usual to fall just below his ears. It sticks up a bit on one side and makes him look younger, somehow, in contrast to the visible shadow of whiskers in patchy spots along his jaw. Beside him is his own gramophone, levitating at his waist level and keeping sleepy pace; the soft notes of The Dream Academy's ['Life In A Northern Town'](https://open.spotify.com/track/4m3OS54KWywYhP7WD7z1cg?si=PeEj0NRZQW-V2Cp5kIntZg) reach her ears as he gets closer.

Trini frowns as they approach one another. When it becomes apparent that he's not going to look up, she decides to softly announce her presence in order not to startle him.

"Ced?"

He seems to come out of his thoughts slowly, head heavy, though his stormy grey eyes brighten a little.

"Hey, Small."

"Morning walk?"

Cedric nods. "And night, really."

Trini sighs as they close the last twenty yards of distance or so. "Can't sleep?" He just shakes his head in reply, letting out a breath and rubbing at his face. She considers for a few moments, watching him. "Is this a you need to be alone thing?"

Cedric shrugs one shoulder. "Dunno. Been walking for hours."

"Why don't you come along with me, then?"

When he shrugs again, she switches her gramophone to her left hand and reaches over to grip his forearm, tugging him gently with her back the way he came.

"I know I need to sleep," he says quietly, as if to preemptively halt a comment from her.

Trini hums. "Sitting for a bit is fine for now, if you can't."

And Cedric looks over proper then, meeting her eyes with his and holding her gaze. Clear gratitude there.

So they walk through the sleeping castle in silence, steps syncing up to slow heartbeats, sounding underneath the soft elegiac melody of the song that continues to play from Cedric's gramophone.

Trini leads the way up to the Astronomy Tower, soon climbing the narrow staircase and pushing the wood door at the top open gently by the iron ring handle. It _creaks_ in greeting, and the two of them walk out onto the ramparts, nothing above them but dark blue sky.

Cedric strides away and taps his gramophone with his wand, dispelling the Hover Charm and putting it down gently on the stone. Leaving it playing, he carefully moves to climb up onto the edge. Sits down with his legs over the side, feet dangling into open air.

Trini puts her gramophone briefcase down on the stone floor too, then settles beside him.

It's still silence between them for a solid couple minutes as they look out over the grounds together, the twilight hanging above and below. The foggy scent of a distant rain reaches them every so often, breathing over the surrounding mountains and obscuring their tops in swaths of clouds; in the back of her mind, Trini has a fleeting thought to check on Kim and her headaches given the changes in air pressure.

Cedric shifts his weight a bit next to her, still staring out at the hazy dawning horizon. "Do you think I'm a decent Captain?" he asks, voice emerging vulnerable and whispered.

The question makes Trini frown. "Of course I do."

He hums, glassy eyes fixed on a spot somewhere far away. "It's just... sometimes I wonder why I entered this thing at all. I'm squad Captain, I'm a Prefect. I do well in school. What do I have to prove?"

Trini stays silent, waiting.

"It kind of felt like the thing to do, right?" he continues, as if asking the mountains for an answer. "The Tournament, I mean. It's such a huge opportunity. And my family could definitely use the gold, but I've never wanted celebrity or anything."

Cedric falls silent for a few moments and Trini hums. "So is it about that then? Proving yourself?" she asks quietly, facing forward like he is, addressing the landscape laid out below them. Trying not to make him feel too poked at.

He hesitates then nods once. "I keep feeling like I need to show the world I'm... something. Somebody." Trini nods too, still mirroring him, and his shoulders curl in a little. "And I'm not sure where that comes from, 'cause it's not like I don't get the validation elsewhere? You know my parents're great. Dad's stubborn, but he always says how proud he is of me."

Cedric makes a little exasperated sound of disbelief then, like someone's just made a tactless joke. "So what am I _looking_ for?"

Trini sighs, eyes following an owl as it swoops towards the castle from the north, aiming for the Owlery in the West Tower. "There's always that thought that people who find typical success are happier, right?" she tries, brow furrowing. "But if you're chasing certain accomplishments because it feels like it's what you're _supposed_ to do, it makes sense it wouldn't always be fulfilling...?"

"Yeah. And I didn't even realise that's what I've been doing until recently, you know?"

"Sure."

"It just feels like I'm accomplishing stuff, getting accolades, but... yeah. None of it feels... good." He shakes his head again, running a hand over the side of his face. "Which sounds _mental_ , doesn't it? Shouldn't I feel lucky and happy? Proud of myself?"

"Have those things made you happy in the past, though?" Trini asks, trying to understand. "Do you feel like you're looking for something now because you've lost something else?"

"Maybe not lost," he answers slowly, like he's trying to get his head around it. "But everything just feels... _less_ than it used to. I don't know how else to describe it."

Trini nods and waits, watching him fidget a bit in her peripherals.

After half a minute he speaks again, "When I had my meeting with Sprout last year—about what I wanted from my life, you know?" Trini nods, and he sighs. "I couldn't really give her a good answer. My dad wants me to join the Ministry and work with him after I graduate, and that's well and good — it'd be nice, I guess."

He pauses, shaking his head. "But I was sitting there with her and I realised that I don't... actually know what _I_ want? I'd never considered until that sodding moment that what my dad wants and what I want might be two different things."

"'Cause..." he trails off, turning his head towards her slightly. "How do people even come to a conclusion like that on their own? Is it something you always know?"

When it becomes clear that he's waiting for her to reply, Trini makes an unsure noise in the back of her throat. "I think some people have an idea early on, sure? But others... sometimes you just pick a vague direction and end up falling into something. Or you might have a goal then realise it's not right, later."

She hums lowly, trying to phrase. "But figuring out what you actually would _like_ to do—in the most basic sense—can be really fucking hard if you're not used to listening to yourself in that way."

Cedric tilts his head a little. "I mean, I know I like Quidditch," he says quietly. "I like school alright, but there's just not... I don't have anything in my life that gets me _excited_. Or... not like I used to feel excitement, anyway, when I was younger. Do you know what I mean?"

"Not having anything that makes you excited?"

"Yeah. It's like with Quidditch gone, there's nothing to look forward to anymore." He sighs heavily, drumming his fingers on his knee. "And I reckon part of me thought the Tournament'd easily replace that — it's a rush, there're crowds cheering you on... but I don't _like_ it the way I do Quidditch, obviously."

Trini nods, brushing her heel against the stone side of the tower.

"I don't want to quit the Tournament," he says, voice soft but tone sure. "I'm enjoying it, and I'm honoured. But everything outside of that is just... the light's gone? The only time that feeling goes away is when I'm with you lot at a party, or when Cho and I are together. But..." he trails off, looking troubled. "I can feel it seeping into all of _that_ , even."

"Is—" she makes quotes in the air, "'it' apathy? An absence of feeling?"

He frowns. "Kind of. Nothing feels like it used to? And it isn't 'cause of the Tournament—it's been awhile."

"Okay," Trini says. She considers for a moment, looking over at him. "Well, what did you like doing before? What used to make you excited when you were younger?"

"You're gonna call me a nerd," he replies, and the smallest hint of a smile pulls at his lips.

Trini taps the side of her foot against his gently. "Just this once I won't, promise."

Cedric shrugs one shoulder. "Used to build models," he says quietly. "Got all these ships in my room at home. A whole shelf of them. They're just collecting dust now."

"I liked reading, too, or just... hiking with my dog," he continues, the smile still lingering on his mouth and growing a little. "We go on walks when I'm home, but we don't spend entire days outside like we used to." He reaches up to grip at the back of his neck, voice abruptly losing the musicality. "'Cause, er, my dad always said it's a waste of a day."

"It's not a waste of a day," Trini says, firm but reassuring. "If you love it, it's not a waste."

"Maybe."

"Really, Ced," she breathes. "Not everything you do has to be in pursuit of something else."

He nods a couple times, though he only looks half convinced. "I guess I just slowly dropped those things as I got older. Felt like I was supposed to grow out of them? And part of that is my dad — he said I was too old to still be 'playing with toys'. But a lot of parents are like that."

"Sure," Trini says. "And yeah, that's a common thing — to think that you have to 'grow out' of stuff. I told someone I read comics last year and they were all, 'aren't you a bit old for that'. And I was like... no?" He chuckles lightly and she sighs. "Have you considered talking with your dad about it?"

Cedric shakes his head. "We don't... like, again, he's a good dad. But we don't talk about feelings stuff." He pauses, frowning. "Reckon I could try though. There's no harm in it, right?"

Trini nods. "It might just be something that _his_ dad told him, you know? Doesn't make it the right thing to say, especially to a little kid. But maybe he's just never stopped to consider it."

"He used to help me with my models, sometimes," Cedric says, smiling a little again. "When I'd need someone else to hold something together or whatever. At first he didn't get it at all, and he'd get frustrated easy." He tilts his head. "But over time, I think he kind of enjoyed it. He started offering without me having to ask."

"Just a guess, but it might've been that he didn't feel like he was 'supposed' to do stuff like that as an adult," Trini says softly. "Ideals like that tend to be passed on when people just... think that's how things are. They don't really question it."

"Yeah," Cedric mutters. "Mind, by this point I don't even know if building'd make me happy like before. I used to look forward to it so much."

"Can't hurt to try," Trini says, brow furrowing. "And if it turns out that you still feel kind of empty, even with that..." her voice gets quieter, trying to be gentle, "there might be something else going on."

But Cedric sighs in immediate understanding, nodding once. "Yeah. Maybe I'll go see a Healer about it once school's over."

Trini reaches over to squeeze his hand. "If you want a buddy I can come with. Get lunch or something after, too. No big."

"Thanks, Small."

"Shut up with that. What're sisters for?"

"Mainly annoyance," he quips, and she looks over to see the brightness back in his eyes.

Trini hums knowingly, then she gets an idea. "Speaking of being annoying — how would you feel about going on a hike with me over Easter? Just us and our dogs?"

He barely hesitates before replying, "I'd really like that."

"Brilliant. I can pester you for a whole day."

Cedric chuckles properly, smiling at her and letting out a deep, settling breath.

They talk like that for awhile longer, Trini easily making the decision to forgo her yoga for today. The album continues to play out from Cedric's gramophone, going through to the end as they watch the storm building to the northwest.

.

With the Second Task finished, Kim's standing with her cloak pulled snug around herself, arms crossed as the chilly wind gusts by every now and then with seeming intent to mess _her_ hair up personally.

The massive wood observers platform beneath her boots gives another groaning _creak_ as the frigid dark water of the Great Lake batters the support posts not far below, provoked by the wind and coming in rougher than usual as it seeks the shore. It doesn't worry her, given they're in the shallows and the platform is quite sturdy, unmoving despite the hundreds of people walking about as they come down from the stands, talking and messing around.

Dark hair dripping wet, Viktor Krum is stood on the single dock that stretches out further into the lake, wrapped tightly in a giant fuzzy towel that's steaming in the cool air. He's just come off one of the little boats that ferried the Champions, their recovered loved ones, and the judges over from the opposite bank. A hearty group of Durmstrang students is gathered around him, chattering away in rapid Bulgarian and smiling as he enthusiastically works through hugging each of them in turn. He's clearly on an adrenaline high, body slowly thawing back to a normal human temperature.

Kim watches them all interact for a few moments, eyes absently travelling over the choppy water and up to the swirling grey, overcast sky. She's waiting for Jason, Billy, and Zack to get back with second servings of leftover popcorn before the snack kiosk closes up, and Trini's with Cedric close by, having been glued to his side since his bare feet hit the dock.

As the group of Durmstrang students begins to make its way towards the main observer platform, their hugging done, Krum's eyes start to sweep about; when he spots Kim, he gives her a goofy thumbs up and breaks away to make a beeline over.

She works to hide her surprise at his approach, adjusting her crossed arms and shifting her weight back a bit. Rubbing his hands together quickly to warm them, Krum calls, "How vas I? Are you impressed?"

Kim laughs lightly, and almost immediately drops her smile to playfully glare at him when he stops a few feet from her on the platform and holds his arms open for a hug. Dripping water as he stands there, falling slower and slower by the second and darkening the wood at his feet; knowing full well what he's asking, given he's still soaked from the lake.

With a roll of her eyes Kim steps forward anyway, closing the space and winding her arms underneath his.

He hugs her like they've known each other for years, melding their bodies together and surrounding her with the clean smell of water vapour mixed with crisp early spring wind. His skin is damp, warm; an errant bead of water runs down his cheek and finds its way onto her temple, and when they step back from one another he's still beaming, the smile so bright and giddy that she can't help but mirror it as her own grows.

"You did decent," Kim replies, voice jokingly curt as she makes a show of wiping the water off her head with her newly-damp sleeve. "Too bad your face didn't stay like that, though."

Krum barks out a deep laugh, running his hand over his short brown hair quickly to mess it up further, sending little droplets of water flying. "Perhaps it vould haff been credit to my looks."

"Might've made you more interesting, too."

He grins down at her. "Ah, vell. Transfiguration vas never my... strongest."

"Clearly."

Walking a bit like he's had a few drinks, legs wobbly from all the swimming, Cedric comes sailing in from the side. His fingers are intertwined with Cho's, and he claps Krum on the shoulder heartily. "Good going, mate."

Krum turns to clasp his forearm, pulling him in for a big hug as well. "And you. I did consider your and Fleur's charm, but I vas trying for speed."

"The shark _was_ quite cool," Cedric chimes, taking Cho's hand again.

Krum throws Kim a playful, conspiratorial look. "Half shark," he quips. "But yes."

And Trini steps up to Kim's side then, standing right up against her so that their shoulders are pressed together. It's unexpected, her seeking out physical contact absent a more serious moment, and Kim's brow twitches once. She considers for half a second before draping her arm around Trini, pulling her in closer and rubbing at her bicep.

Trini doesn't move away. If anything, her posture seems to relax a bit.

As Krum and Cedric continue chatting, with Hermione and Cho both wrapped in blankets and standing nearby doing the same, Kim tilts her head towards Trini slightly. "How're you doing?" she breathes, quiet enough to not be heard by anyone else over the excited clamour and post-Task bustle present around them.

Trini just hums, the sound noncommittal. Without a word, she reaches up to her own shoulder and interlaces their fingers. Takes a deep breath in and lets it out, though her eyes never leave Cedric's face.

.

Early the following week, Kim walks into the kitchens to find everything oddly aflutter for post-suppertime. She didn't feel like eating with the rest of the school today, in the throes of a more down mood than usual for reasons she hasn't yet managed to pinpoint.

It could very likely be that there's no real cause for it at all, of course, save for her brain's chemical predisposition to linger in the Depression Zone; that's something that isn't uncommon, in her experience.

She strides further into the busy kitchens and her brow furrows. Though the regular group of House elves is parked in front of the massive crackling hearth at the back wall, playing a jaunty tune to provide a lively soundtrack to everything, the usual arrangement of four tables that directly mirror the ones above in the Great Hall has been changed. Now, there's one single table standing in the middle of the cavernous space.

It smells different, too—more like her mum's cooking than the typical Hogwarts meal offerings. And the school doesn't _only_ serve white people food, on the whole, but it's certainly the majority. The overwhelming scents she's registering at the moment are more like a _baharat_ blend, though—cumin, cardamom, cloves, among others.

Curious, Kim wracks her brain for a rough list of holidays and makes a little noise in understanding when she realises the occasion: Ramadan's just come to a close.

Not wanting to interfere with the festivities preparations, Kim walks over to a small wooden table positioned up against the wall and sits down to wait a bit. With one leg straddled on either side of the bench, she raises a hand to her neck to run a finger along Ptero's spine absentmindedly.

After a minute or so, ~~~~she hears the painting that hides the kitchens entrance swing open.

"Kim?"

Recognising the voice at once, Kim twists around on the bench and watches as Mackenzie and Will walk in.

"Hey," Kim says, knee bouncing on the stone floor.

Mackenzie gives her a jerk of the head but veers off to approach the elves stationed at an array of large steaming pots in the massive stove area, clearly on a mission. Flashing a smile, Will sails lazily around the table and plops down across from Kim.

" _What's up?_ " Will signs, watching Mackenzie out of the corner of her eye.

Kim switches to BSL immediately, turning towards her a bit more. " _I was about to get food. You?_ "

" _Same. Ran out of something upstairs._ "

Mackenzie begins to talk with some of the elves, brow furrowed but voice kind, just loud enough to be heard over the busy noise. After half a minute or so she looks over to Will and signs the number three with a confused face, to which Will replies back with a string of motions.

Kim doesn't entirely catch it, given Will's turned a bit away from her, so she just waits.

" _Translating,_ " Will explains, as Mackenzie goes back to talking with the elves. " _I'm not verbal today. Murder tries her best._ "

Tilting her head, Kim replays Will's hand movements back in her mind a couple times before realising she's referring to Mackenzie. She chuckles, eyes twinkling. " _Can't say I've seen that one as a name sign before._ "

" _She's... special_ ," Will quips, glancing over at Mackenzie fondly. " _It started as a joke her brother and I made a few years ago. Kind of stuck._ "

" _Her brother signs too?_ "

" _Yeah, he's deaf. First year._ "

Kim's eyebrows shoot up. " _I didn't know she had a brother here._ "

" _He's in Hufflepuff,_ " Will signs, smiling. " _Different last names—they're both adopted._ "

Kim nods, considering this new information as Mackenzie comes walking over to them, carrying a large wide dish in both hands that's stacked high with what looks like some kind of dessert and looking very proud of herself.

But instead of getting up and making for the door, Will continues to watch Kim with something indiscernible in her eyes. " _Why don't you come up with us?_ "

Surprised, Kim shakes her head. Pauses for a moment before she signs back, " _It's not my place. But thank you_."

Mackenzie makes a noise in disagreement. "Really, Kim."

Will inclines her head. " _We'd be happy to have you._ "

As she looks between them and sighs lightly, Kim discreetly runs her tongue along the thin metal of her retainer, still getting used to the feeling of it being in her mouth all of the time.

And she certainly doesn't want to come off as an arse, so she finally nods, acquiescing.

Despite her hesitancy, Kim finds herself smiling as she walks into the Great Hall a few minutes later. A single House table has been dressed up for the occasion with an elegant white and gold tablecloth, sitting proudly in the middle of the hall and mirroring the arrangement in the kitchens below.

The table is full of people—around a hundred students eating and laughing, all four Houses together. Professors Sinistra and Babbling are at the far end sat shoulder-to-shoulder, talking with the students around them and smiling.

A song Kim doesn't know is playing from one of Hogwarts' giant brass horn gramophones in the far corner, the sound merrily travelling around and up to the twilight ceiling. What could be thousands of single candle lanterns hover above them and all along the walls, with lines of heavy multi-coloured silks stringing them together by magic.

It's a festive, jovial atmosphere, and Kim lets out a breath.

She trails just behind Mackenzie and Will, following them through the strangely open hall to the back half of the table. When they arrive at their intended spot, Mackenzie places the dish of desserts down next to a jug of water.

Some of the other kids nearby look up at them as they arrive, and Mackenzie makes a little motion with her hand, gentler and seemingly uncharacteristic. "Can you lot budge up at all? We brought a friend."

"Oh, hey K," Jake Holling says, twisting around and brushing her hip with his shoulder as he moves.

Kim gives him a small smile, pleased to see another familiar face. He's in her House, in Tommy's year. "Hey, _Eid Mubarak_."

" _Eid sa'id_ ," he returns, scooting to the side to make space. "Everybody, this is Kim."

The others nearby give her little waves or smiles in greeting, and Kim smiles back. When she hesitates for a moment, Will meets her eyes at once and jerks her head towards the bench.

" _We don't bite_ ," Will signs, and Kim chuckles lowly. " _Sit_."

" _Thanks_ ," Kim signs back. Mackenzie and Will settle in, and Kim parks herself beside Jake on the bench.

Mackenzie tips into her right shoulder. "Hungry?"

"A bit."

Without prelude, Jake lurches to the side and grabs an empty plate from a stack on the table, clearing space in front of Kim with a flourish and placing it there gently. "Go for it," he says easily.

And it's strange—Kim's used to him being over the top and borderline obnoxious day-to-day, ever the class clown. Him and Tommy get along swimmingly because of this. But here and now, he's clearly trying to make her feel welcome. It's subdued; warm.

"You know Jason, right?" comes a deep voice from across the table, and Kim looks up to see a lanky guy watching her with kind eyes.

"Yeah, you're in Gryffindor too...?" Kim tries, thinking she recognises him.

He nods. "I'm Scott. Year below you."

"Nice to meet you."

"This is Wayne," Scott says, patting the guy next to him on the shoulder.

With his mouth full of food, Wayne gives her a little wave, and the girl beside Jake on Kim's left leans back from the table. "I'm Katie."

Kim nods warmly, knee bouncing under the table as she tries to remember everyone's names. She feels Mackenzie's eyes on her for a few seconds before she tips away to whisper something to Will.

After a moment, Will takes an object out of her pocket and hands it behind Mackenzie, tapping Kim on the bicep. It's a piece of parchment that's been torn out of a small notebook, as well as a fountain pen.

"For names, if you want," Mackenzie mutters lowly, so only Kim can hear underneath the happy chatter.

Kim's heart swells, and she takes the piece of parchment from Will with a smile. Mackenzie watches her before gently taking both the parchment and pen out of her hands, clearing a little space between them and laying it out on the table.

Mackenzie begins to draw a diagram, a rectangle with messy squares on either side. She looks around at everyone and starts writing names down, labeling the squares corresponding to where people are sitting.

"Ethan's beside Katie, but he's got his nose in a book right now," Mackenzie narrates softly, jerking her head a bit to the left. Kim nods, watching as she completes it and gives it a little pat. "Cheat sheets are useful sometimes, innit."

"How'd you know I'm rubbish with that?"

Mackenzie smiles. "Your face when we all met you proper back in September. Looked like you were trying to work out something right complex."

Kim chuckles, the corner of her mouth pulling up. "Good to know I'm not subtle."

Mackenzie gives the parchment seating chart another pat. "Just leave it here. No worries."

"Thanks, really."

She settles in after that, beginning to chat as she tucks into the abundance of food and drink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter track is 'it's a good life if you don't weaken' by the tragically hip.
> 
> \---
> 
> hello! bit of time b/w updates, my bad. life is bananas so I drove up to my grandmothers in the woods (where she only has dial-up) + stayed there for a bit to disconnect.
> 
> to start—cedric, by this fic, is clinically depressed. his feeling 'less' is a nod to part of what depression does—saps your ability to Feel much, generally. you don't have to be someone who's had a lot of Heavy Stuff happen to have this issue. brains are weird, and it can appear in anybody.
> 
> fun fic fact: the song 'life in a northern town' was written as an elegy to nick drake, whose song 'pink moon' was the prev chapter title track.
> 
> contd from prev mentions, trinis still anxious about cedrics participation in the tournament, understandably.
> 
> kim + krum are slowly becoming closer, but again I'll stress that it's platonic. they hang out nearly every week in their library period with billy, after all.
> 
> the celebration in the great hall is for eid al-fitr. mack isnt religious but she goes with will every year cause theyre bffs. scott truman, katie walker + ethan james are new intros from PR canon. note that scott is trans! jake you know through gia, and you've seen wayne a few times in trinis POV.
> 
> macks [name sign](https://www.handspeak.com/culture/index.php?id=79) in BSL is 'murder' (w/ a closed fist making a stabbing motion downward), but it's done with raised eyebrows in a cheeky way. meant as a joke poking fun at mack and her deadpan attitude that'll go to goofy in the span of a moment.
> 
> as for owen, mack's brother—mack was adopted younger, around age 4, and her dad switched her surname to his own. but owen was adopted at age 8, so he already had his name as part of his identity. his full name (GoF ch12) is owen cauldwell—that surname was given to him bc he came to the orphanage from a tiny town called cauldwell in england.
> 
> my in-fic build = the ministry finds magical orphans using the same Trace system that's tied to every underage wizard in the UK. note dumbledore found voldy before he turned 11 and offered him a spot at hogwarts. so the ministry—learning from the voldy situation, maybe—brings magical orphaned kids to ministry-run orphanages. mack was in a ministry orphanage from around the ages of 2 to 4.
> 
> some BSL stuff: by this fic, the signs used to refer to the Houses in the 90s are modified versions of the signs for each house animal. hufflepuff is the letter 'h' then 'badger', slytherin 's' then 'snake', gryffindor 'g' then 'lion', and ravenclaw differs a bit, where it's 'eagle' before 'r'.
> 
> I'm sure there've been other signs used in the past, especially given the awful real world history in regards to deaf/HoH kids being punished for using sign in schools up until quite recently. 
> 
> now, because I've killed god (we don't speak her name anymore) aka the creator of the HP universe, I make the rules. which is to say that my thought here is that UK wizards likely have their own sign dialect. irl we've written record of early BSL in the 1500s, but people've been signing forever—sign languages develop + grow in deaf communities, with huge variations globally. given how canonically insular the wizarding community is, it'd stand to reason that there's a difference! not super stark from BSL, but notable.
> 
> in the UK, deaf and mute people use wands + unique single-handed signs to cast spells, with mute people likely using nonverbal casting later. someone HoH like mack, who's deaf in one ear, could use all 3—verbal, signed, nonverbal—bc she can hear the incantations + knows how to 'pronounce' them in her mind. but owen, who only got a magical hearing implement after he was adopted (it functions like a cochlear implant—more on that to come) still majority of the time uses sign.
> 
> mack didn't start learning BSL until she became friends with will in first year, but when she told her dad he started learning too. he was considering adopting again, and he later had the thought that they could provide a good home environment for a deaf child, given mack is HoH as well. owen came into the fam in spring 1992. will was at macks house a lot that summer—that's when owen and will gave mack her name sign.
> 
> fyi profs sinistra and babbling MIGHT BE DATING IDK? WINK WINK.
> 
> \---
> 
> PS—to the person who asked about translating this fic in my askbox (not putting your name here for Privacy Reasons), could you DM me on tumblr? :)
> 
> next time on glee: more fun plot development. and COMING UP in 2 chapters is the most Tense interaction yet between kim/trini, in a Gay Way. happens in hogsmeade after they've both been drinking. reminder this is a **SLOW BURN**! but the tension + chemistry is there, so prepare 2 scream.
> 
> as always, thank you all for your continued readership and comments. I hope you're all taking care, and until next time! <3


	58. Hold Back The River

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/7tmtOEDxPN7CWaQWBsG1DY?si=GWBw6zlfRDGN_AyzniH12Q). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

In Potions on Friday evening Kim's reading through the Wit-Sharpening Potion recipe in her textbook while idly setting up her cutting board and the rest of her materials. At the front of the class, Snape is writing on the blackboard as everyone else settles in around them for their double period.

A few tables away on the other side of the aisle, Malfoy and his friends are busy laughing and chatting about the rubbish _Witch Weekly_ article that came out earlier, throwing looks at Granger, Potter, and Weasley.

Snape turns around and surveys everyone as they continue to set up: taking out cauldrons and other supplies, arranging stations, and glancing over the assigned potion recipe. Despite the ruckus and cackles sounding from Kim's Housemates his eyes lock on something near the back of the classroom, and he's soon stalking in that direction.

Within another minute, Snape's grabbed the _Witch Weekly_ article and begun a dramatic reading of it aloud to the class. Kim listens without looking back—admittedly, it's kind of funny hearing him drone about. But not everyone seems to find it humorous; Snape's tone gets progressively more annoyed as he goes, and he soon directs Granger, Potter, and Weasley to separate for the remainder of the lesson.

Potter goes stamping past Kim and Jason, moving as ordered to sit alone at the vacant table right in front of Snape's desk across the aisle. Out of the corner of her eye, she watches Hermione sit at Pansy's table on the far side of the room, carrying herself with the air of a person walking into the most contagious ward of a hospital; she sits with dignified poise all the same and begins setting up her instruments again, making a point to ignore how Pansy grins wide and blows obnoxiously at her bushy brown hair like a bratty five year-old.

Closer is Zack, who's sitting with the back of his chair right up against Potter's new seat. When he catches her gaze he raises his eyebrows at her once, lips pursed, and resumes his potion-brewing.

Kim and Jason do as well, beginning to work along with the rest of the class. They promptly divide their ingredients list up to make the work go by faster, her starting to slice both of their ginger roots as he delightedly goes to town on their scarab beetles with his heavy mortar and pestle. Across their table, Rose and Rocky are doing the same.

But Snape's being his usual slimy self, predictably pulling at her limited ability to focus in how he stalks about the room and peers at everyone in turn, leaning over shoulders and critiquing everything they're doing.

His faux casual air soon becomes transparent, though, because he stops right beside Potter at the front and starts to mutter at him in a voice so low that Kim can't make heads or tails of it. She catches Zack's face out of the corner of her eye again, and he's notably pretending not to listen.

Whatever Snape's saying is still intelligible to her, though, and she tries to push the distracting mutterings from her mind.

It works alright until a clearly _fuming_ Potter snaps, "I haven't been anywhere near your office!"

Jason bops her trainer with his under the table, and she meets his eyes to find him frowning.

Because the topic of Snape's office—and the burglary there two months ago—is of particular interest to them; they've been planning their Animagus potion ingredients heist for exactly three weeks, since Kim and Trini first came up with the idea. And Kim nearly bumping into Potter on the staircase the night Snape's office was hit led her to believe he wasn't the culprit, but Snape doesn't seem to be of the same opinion.

"Don't lie to me," Snape mutters, voice louder than before. "Boomslang skin. Gillyweed. Both come from my private stores, and I know who stole them."

Kim's unable to keep her eyebrows from shooting up, and she looks over at Jason again to find him already staring at her, slack-faced and eyes wide.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Potter mutters, not looking up from his ingredients preparation.

"You were out of bed on the night my office was broken into!" Snape fires back, all thought of being discreet discarded, apparently. "Mad-Eye Moody might have joined your fan club, but I will not tolerate your behaviour! One more night-time stroll into my office, Potter, and you will pay!"

"Right. I'll bear that in mind if I ever get the urge to go in there."

Kim's mouth ticks up on one side at that, always appreciative of a good comeback.

But the topic of discussion is of much more importance right now—with their eyes still locked, she shakes her head once and Jason inclines his in reply. Across the aisle, Zack is watching them with a carefully unaffected face, though one of his hands is gripping his knee hard under the table.

In their planning, they'd assumed that Snape's office had only been broken into once this year. Everyone heard about it the first time because he wouldn't quit pestering students and randomly insinuating suspicion for weeks afterward.

But... had Potter stolen both of those ingredients on the same night, or did he actually manage to break in _twice_?

If he did, how on _earth_ are they going to do it again?

Kim stares at her empty cauldron, mind whirring but unable to convene with Jason or Zack about it until they're out of class. But from her chats with Krum—and the regular gossip floating around the school post the Second Task—she's well aware Potter used Gillyweed to breathe while in the lake. If he did break into Snape's office twice, he's more adept than she thought.

Snape and Potter mutter heatedly at one another for some time longer, during which Snape makes a few fully-voiced and colourful threats involving Veritaserum. Here and there, the rest of the class manages brief glances over, nobody willing to test Snape's wrath but unable to keep themselves from listening in.

_Knock, knock._

Kim turns her head slightly to the side, following the raps at the classroom door, and Snape straightens his back from where he's still parked next to Potter's table.

"Enter," Snape drawls, striding over to his desk and standing behind it.

The door opens and Durmstrang's Headmaster Karkaroff walks into the classroom, everyone's eyes following him as he walks up the aisle. He looks pale and troubled, finger worrying at the scraggly goatee on his chin.

Once he reaches Snape they go back and forth for a few moments in hushed voices. Snape snaps something but Karkaroff doesn't make to leave, instead lingering behind his desk as the class works.

Kim and Jason continue their ingredients preparation, with her now having to make a _very_ concentrated effort to stay on task. She's using an extremely sharp knife and is quite attached to the idea of having intact fingers, but it's evermore difficult to focus after everything they just overheard; Karkaroff hovering at the top of the classroom isn't helping, either.

Snape returns to his regular prowling as if nothing happened, and when his back is turned Jason pats Kim's bouncing knee fondly then dips to the side to sift through his messenger bag on the floor. He produces one of the strawberry-flavoured hard candies that he uses as little incitement rewards for her when they're doing schoolwork together—a method picked up from her mother, years ago—and discreetly twitches his wand to levitate it between them, unwrapping it silently mid-air by magic.

Kim gives him a small smile, opening her mouth as he directs it towards her like a symphony conductor, wearing a silly look of concentration on his face. Once it hits her tongue she hums happily, glancing towards Snape to make sure he didn't see.

"Thanks," she whispers. Jason makes a little noise in the back of his throat then jerks his head at Rose and Rocky in question; Rose grins and _snaps_ her pink bubble gum in reply but Rocky accepts, and Jason sends another sweet floating over, soon directing it into his mouth as well.

Rocky mimes celebrating as if Jason's just scored the Big Goal in an important Quidditch match, punching the air for effect, and Rose shoves him on the shoulder.

The rest of the double period passes without any further disturbances, and the class soon falls back into its usual hushed chatter as everyone brews their potions. All the while, Karkaroff occasionally paces the front of the classroom but otherwise doesn't make to leave.

Once it's over proper Kim and Jason begin packing up their supplies with everyone else, eager to get out of the stuffy dungeon. Potter managed to spill his armadillo bile all over the floor a couple minutes to the bell—now out of its sealed container, the awful acidic smell is filling the air rapidly, and Jason nods at Zack to indicate that they'll wait for him outside.

Jason shoulders his leather messenger bag and waits as Kim does the same with her rucksack. The both of them make their way slowly towards the door as Zack lingers, extracting himself carefully from his chair and trying to maneuver around the mess on the floor without getting any on his trainers.

The class files out, Snape not even bothering to dismiss them beyond vaguely waving his hand. Clearly preoccupied with his uninvited guest.

And as Kim and Jason reach the door Snape's unamused hiss sounds from the front of the classroom, addressing Karkaroff, "What's so urgent?"

They exit out into the dreary dungeon corridor, swerving off to the side a little to make way for others to go by as they wait for Zack. When he emerges thirty seconds later, his face is set to his most serious look, and Kim and Jason nod gravely.

"Did you—" Jason starts.

Zack shakes his head, raising a hand to gently put a finger on Jason's lips. "Not yet."

They begin to walk in contemplative silence, ruminating over everything they overheard during lesson and trailing the rest of their classmates as they make for the main staircase that will take them upstairs to supper.

Once they reach the Gryffindor table they settle in at the very end on the same side, closest to the raised dais that houses the staff table at the top of the hall. As soon as the three of them sit down they each let out a heavy breath.

Zack stares at his warped reflection in a pumpkin juice flagon. "Seems we've got a lot to unpack."

"It could've been both were stolen at the same time," Jason tries, though he's visibly uptight; not even moving to put food on his plate.

"Didn't sound like that, though," Zack says, massaging the back of his neck with a grimace. "Slime seemed newly ticked off, no?"

Jason sighs. "Yeah."

"Wait — I reckon it's _got_ to've been hit twice," Kim says, feeling something click in her mind. "Potter had his Triwizard egg with him that night. Why would he bring it if he burgled Snape's office? It's not exactly quiet. Nearly woke the whole castle when he dropped it."

"So someone else likely did the first steal," Jason says, addressing his empty plate, "then he did another sometime after to get the Gillyweed...?"

Kim and Zack both nod slowly, and there's silence for a few moments as the three of them sit there, each considering.

"That stuff with Karkaroff was weird too, innit," Zack murmurs, so quietly that Kim barely catches it.

"Unorthodox, sure," she says.

But Zack shakes his head. "I mean more what happened after you lot left."

Jason hums. "Did they argue more?"

"Not exactly," Zack replies, then hesitates. "Karkaroff pulled his sleeve up and was all, 'it's never been this clear' and Snape right flipped his lid." He frowns. "Told him to 'put it away.'"

Kim's breath hitches, and Jason's brow furrow gets deeper.

"Didn't see what 'it' was," Zack continues, making quotes in the air with his fingers, seemingly not noticing either of their expressions. "Maybe he's got some whack injury."

"Did you see which arm?" Jason asks quietly.

Zack frowns. "Er..." he raises his hands in front of himself and makes 'L' shapes with his index fingers and thumbs, "left. Why?"

Her suspicion confirmed, Kim sighs heavily. "Reckon I might know what he was on about. Remember how my dad's been sending me those letters?"

"About his—" Zack starts, then his eyes widen. "Ohhhhh."

Jason nods. "Yeah."

"Hang on, does that mean good ol' King Durmstrang was...?" Zack mutters, pure bewilderment in his voice. "They let that git head up a _school_?"

"Aye, they let Snape in here," Jason quips, rubbing a hand along the side of his face.

"Still haven't recovered from _that_ ridiculous bit of info, by the by," Zack chimes, staring at the pumpkin juice flagon again. "Okay though, wow. I mean, this isn't news then, right?"

Kim keeps silent, and Jason looks over at her with concern in his eyes. "Not news, no," he says, then turns back to Zack. "We knew the others were noticing the change too, but this makes it a lot more..." he trails off, sighing.

"Real," Kim finishes, and he nods.

Jason hums. "And urgent. Reckon this might be the push we needed to start planning those sparring practices." He looks between them. "We've been waffling, but it's clearly overdue. Ignoring isn't making anything go away."

"Over Easter, maybe," Zack mutters, drumming his fingers on the table. "'Cause we've more pressing stuff to deal with now, if his office was hit twice."

"This doesn't change the plan," Jason says slowly.

"Not bigtime, but it'll need alterations," Zack mutters, reaching over to a dish of breaded pork and spearing a few pieces with his knife. "Gotta prepare for more security, and we need to do it in the next four days."

Kim nods. "Timeline's still the same..." she trails off, frowning. "Guess this is the downside of waiting as long as we could."

"It was the right call," Jason says, following Zack's lead and taking a couple rolls from a neatly stacked tray. He puts one on Kim's plate and she smiles softly at him. "Again, getting in there and not finding enough of them'd be shit." He pauses, tearing apart his roll and beginning to spread butter on it. "I'm glad we found this out beforehand, though. Even as close as we are."

"Same," Zack mutters, now busy constructing an obnoxiously tall breaded pork sandwich. Kim and Jason watch as he does, finishing by squishing it down into a more manageable height with a soft _crunch_ before he dunks it in gravy and takes a big bite.

The three of them eat in comfortable silence for a couple minutes until Zack brightens, eyes fixed on the doors to the Great Hall. Looking up, Kim spots Billy and Trini on their way in with the rest of the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw fourth-years, having finished up Care of Magical Creatures.

"Er," Jason mutters, grimacing. "Who's gonna tell Trini?"

Kim blows a raspberry and shakes her head quickly, making an effort to look occupied with piling shredded cheese into her steaming French onion soup.

"I'd usually say 'not it' but I'll bagsy this," Zack replies, through a hearty mouthful of hot sandwich. "She's gonna need someone to punch, innit."

"Chivalry isn't dead, mate," Jason quips, patting him on the shoulder fondly.

"I live to serve."

"Might not be living much longer after she hears about this," Kim mutters, returning Billy's wave as he and Trini turn down the aisle and begin striding towards them.

When Billy and Trini reach them proper they sit shoulder-to-shoulder across the table, stowing their rucksacks at their feet and sighing contentedly.

"Alright, all?" Billy asks through a happy exhale, and Kim, Jason, and Zack each nod in reply, trying very hard to act casual.

But Trini catches it right away. She looks between the three of them, eyes narrowing in the strange silence as it stretches on. They all stare back as they eat, and when neither of them make to speak, she huffs.

"Okay, what gives?"

.

Late that night finds Kim set up in her regular homework spot in the depths of the dungeons, tapping her foot along to the beat of ['Halah'](https://open.spotify.com/track/6JuEshIRliNXRU1LXctRjZ?si=Wl__rvIdRm2MrBn8fhd4Mw) by Mazzy Star as it plays out from her gramophone a few feet away. The chilly classroom is otherwise silent around her, the familiar high worktables and stools sitting empty in the dark and casting long shadows in the soft light of her antique gas lamp.

Back up against the wall and using a textbook as a writing desk, she's making notes with her Potions book and a couple others open on the cold dark stone floor beside her. The main task tonight is to work on her Wit-Sharpening Potion essay—remarkably ahead of time, by her standards—in preparation for their planned heist next week.

Come Wednesday, her role is to sit outside Snape's classroom and pretend to work on her paper, ready to act as one of three possible distractions if he happens to leave early. In effort to have proper questions to ask him, though, she has to legitimately research the topic first.

 _Chirp_.

Kim looks up and smiles at the muffled gurgle of a greeting—Sabre is slinking towards her out of the dark, having entered the classroom using some cat-specific means other than the closed door.

"Hi Sabre," Kim says quietly, reaching out her hand slowly. "What you got there?"

In answer Sabre jerks her head up once, eyes fixed on Kim's neck. Ptero pops his head up from where he was dozing against her collarbone, not gone out for his regular mouse hunt yet. He's been feeling a bit under the weather, but he slithers across Kim's shoulder and spirals down her arm all the same, wrapping around the palm of her raised hand.

Sabre promptly opens her mouth and drops what she's holding—a dead mouse—on the floor, nudging it forward with her nose once and giving a proper _meow_. Seemingly a gift.

Kim chuckles lowly. "Is that for me?"

Now only a couple feet apart, Ptero hisses softly at Sabre. It's not in Parseltongue, though, and Kim tilts her head to the side as Sabre responds with another low gurgle and a string of chirps.

" _It's for me_ ," Ptero says in Parseltongue, craning his head back to blink up at Kim. " _Did you tell her I wasn't well?_ "

Kim shakes her head, curious. " _No, I didn't._ " She lowers her hand closer to the floor, and Ptero slithers off to encircle the mouse. Moving her hand a bit away from him, she scratches behind one of Sabre's ears, who headbutts her palm with enthusiasm.

"Thanks, love," Kim whispers, touched by the gesture. "That was kind of you."

Sabre chirps again and promptly lays down on the floor, pressed right against Kim's thigh. Ptero quickly swallows the mouse, small enough for him to eat without too much effort, and soon makes his way along the floor to curl into a ball between Sabre's paws.

Kim smiles down at them, happy that they've become friends. An unlikely pair, perhaps, but she's not at all worried that Sabre would try to hurt him. And as a magical snake Ptero's more than capable of taking care of himself anyway, even with larger predator animals.

She settles back into her work, listening to the album and Sabre's soft purring as she makes her way through researching.

.

"It _was_ weird, him being absent for the Task," Trini says the next morning at breakfast, looking over at the newspaper article Kim's got laid out on the table— _Mystery Illness of Bartemius Crouch_. "Not showing for the Yule Ball's one thing, but..."

"How's the Ministry not been on top of this?" Jason says, jerking his head at the paper as well. "Like, sure the bloke's been disgraced, but he's still a higher-up. Hasn't been seen since November and nobody thought it might be more than a spot of time off?"

Kim hums. "I wonder if they're not busy with other rubbish. Like, the World Cup... and that Ministry witch missing since the fall?" She frowns, hesitates. "Not to mention the... even _more_ alarming thing." She drums her fingers on her left forearm, indicating the spot where a Dark Mark would be tattooed. The others nod in understanding.

"Their capabilities surely must be more robust than that," Billy says, not looking up from spreading a thin layer of Marmite on a piece of toast. Once he's satisfied, he bites into it and chews, brow furrowed. "It's a massive oversight."

"At best," Trini murmurs, busy coring a satsuma by hand, the tangy citrus smell pricking at Kim's nose and making her feel more awake.

Jason moves to do the same with his own, but with much less grace—he bites the peel, face screwing up at the unpleasant taste, and rips part of it off. Clearly pleased, he begins to strip the remainder back with his fingers and looks up at Kim, baring his teeth in silent question and flashing a glimpse of the silver retainer wires looped around both of his upper canines.

Seeing no evidence of orange peel stuck there, Kim shakes her head. "You're good."

With a happy hum Jason finishes up, tearing the satsuma in half and handing it to her across the table. Kim smiles wide and crams the entire thing into her mouth; true to form, he immediately does the same.

Trini rolls her eyes at their behaviour and mutters a word of thanks to Zack as he tops up her coffee mug. "Alright — we're aiming for three o'clock or so to head over to town, yeah?"

Jason nods. "Depending if we get anywhere with altering our plans," he answers, voice conspiratorial to imply the topic he's referring to.

They only have a few days to at least _try_ to prepare for Snape's inevitable increased security, and next week is already busy: they have a test in Defense Against the Dark Arts, a Herbology essay to turn in, and Kim and Trini have a big translation assignment due for Ancient Runes. Post what they're hoping is a successful heist, the five of them also need to go out into the grounds later in the week to obtain the final ingredient for their Animagus potions.

But today is the warmest of the year so far, which is great news—their last ingredient is a teaspoon each of a very specific type of dew, which is nigh impossible to obtain in winter temperatures.

Kim sighs. The time crunch with all of this is regrettable, but there's nothing to be done.

"That reminds me—" Trini starts, rifling through her robes for a moment and producing her leather-bound notebook. She writes something down then stops, looking up at Zack. "Mate, you said you've got sunglasses, right? Or do we need to stop by Gladrags too?"

Zack shakes his head. "I'm good, Crazy Girl. But thanks."

Trini finishes up with her notebook and pockets it again. "I reckon that's it in terms of random plan supplies, then. If the chemist doesn't have eyedrops I'll just use a little phial of water or something."

"You mean you can't cry on cue?" Kim quips, grinning when Trini glares at her. She makes a point of shrugging and examines her nails. "Seems like quite the gap in your Hufflepuff theatre training."

"Really never gonna drop that, are you," Trini grumbles, stabbing at her bowl of fruit salad with new vigour. "I mention it _one_ time..."

"I think your House having a theatre company is very cool, Trini," Billy says, popping the last of his toast into his mouth. "I'm sure if you put your mind to it, you'll learn how to cry on cue in no time."

Trini sends a soft smile Billy's way, clearly aware that he didn't catch the ribbing tone Kim was using. She looks back at Kim with the same deadpan expression, though, and huffs. "Not everything requires spelling out."

"No?" Kim chimes. "I prefer when stuff's simple and clear, myself."

"Sure you do," Trini mutters. "Me, I reckon life requires nuance."

"If nuance means obfuscation, sure."

"Ooooooh, _big_ word there, Kim—"

"Is that supposed to be an insult, or—"

"I'm just saying. So much for keeping shit _simple—_ "

"Ladies," Jason interjects, in his best Dad Voice. "I request you wait until I've finished my cuppa to continue with this nonsense, please."

Kim growls lowly but shuts up, staring at Trini with mirth in her eyes. Trini scoffs, though the corner of her mouth ticks up _just_ a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> title track is 'hold back the river' by james bay.
> 
> snape/harry + snape/karkaroff lines = straight from my copy of GoF.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO WE BACK. I know we've been behind schedule lately BUT next chapter's hogsmeade and you'll be happy to know that I've had that written for some time!
> 
> onward, end of the first week of march! we've a plot collision with a scene from GoF (potions with karkaroff!) like what happened with kim on the night snapes office was burgled (the 1st time, by fake moody! tho nobody knows that yet).
> 
> you'll recall dobby was the gillyweed culprit of steal #2. I think they changed it to neville in the film...? idk. but harry's innocent for both. 
> 
> note that this is a case of me carefully weaving our story around HP canon—the kids couldn't try to hit snape's office BEFORE this moment in potions for CANON reasons, cause otherwise snape would've listed the moth chrysalis' as missing as well (presuming they obtain some!). see? DIFFICULT!
> 
> but there's a legit Fic Reason the kids haven't done it yet, already mentioned—they need to wait for warm weather, cause that increases the chance that snape gets a new shipment RE what zack said about migration patterns etc.
> 
> the kids now know they're planning to break into a place that's not only been burgled once, but twice. the likelihood of increased security was already high, but like kim said... it's gonna be TOUGH now. I _WONDER_ how they're gonna do it, hmm!
> 
> again, the bit with karkaroff is canon. was included cause the kids needed a poke to start on their sparring practices—first mentioned in chapter 46, after kim told the gang about the talk she and maddy had over winter break RE her dads dark mark. 
> 
> refresher: the idea is to start practising offensive/defensive spells in the near future, cause they're Very Worried and don't feel ready to stand up to such a scary threat. and of course they aren't yet! they're only 4th year! but yes. this becomes ESPECIALLY relevant in year 5, when umbridge is on the scene + that type of magic is expressly suppressed.
> 
> you'll note jason doing a little adhd trick there with kim in potions—giving external rewards to help her stay on task. this is something both him and tommy've done for kim forever. may seem juvenile to some, but it really isnt—it's based in science and people with adhd can benefit from that type of positive reinforcement. it's like water wings for executive dysfunction of that nature. the bit about it being maddy he picked it up from is a nod to her medical background.
> 
> now, it's decently well known that karkaroff was a death eater cause he used to be in azkaban + his trial was a Big Deal. he only got out cause he sold a bunch of ppl out in trade. kim/jason knowing that while zack didn't makes sense—they grew up much more heavily influenced by wizarding culture/happenings than he did. zack saying he 'hasn't recovered' from them telling him that snape used to be a death eater is also a nod to that + kims dad running in those crowds.
> 
> RE kim in her regular dungeon classroom (where she took zack once, and we've seen her there a few times alone so far—different from her Panic Attack Cupboard) witness sabre being a darling and taking care of ptero. he's not seriously sick tho, don't worry! just under the weather. but yes, they're friends! adorable!
> 
> those bits about trini remembering to buy eyedrops, zack needing sunglasses, and kim preparing her essay in advance all for the purpose of their Heist Plan will be explained when we get there! :) our kids're so stupid, I love them.
> 
> both barty crouch sr and bertha jorkins, a ministry witch, have been missing since november. these're important canon notes RE the Voldy Darkness rising. stuff's starting to move FASTER.
> 
> (jason/kim/zack werent SCARED of telling trini about the break-ins, they just figured she wasn't gonna be pleased. she wouldn't get mad at THEM for that obviously, tho. more of a joke, but an Annoyed Trini is a JOY to deal with, of course.)
> 
> Gladrags = a wizard clothing shop in hogsmeade. trini's just going through her to-do list for their trip later in the day, including buying those eyedrops.
> 
> last, we've cute bickering between trini and kim. trini mentioned Reading Room to the others off-screen and kim's having a great time with it. jason, as always, steps in to break it up. ever the team dad. 
> 
> so yes, our girls're comfortable with each other! we know this! but notice the subtext—RE communicating feelings, kim prefers to-the-point and simple while trini leans into nuance. this is... relevant to their relationship. *inSErT eYeS EmOJI* !!!
> 
> \---
> 
> can't thank you enough for reading as always, all. I adore every one of you, and a huge thanks to those of you who comment. THAT SHIT FUELS ME LIKE U DONT EVEN KNOW!
> 
> take care, and until next time. 
> 
> (YOU READY FOR SOME GAY TENSION NEXT CHAPTER? ARE YA?!?! _CACKLES_ )


	59. Delicate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> those of you who use spotify can find the chapter title track [here](https://open.spotify.com/track/6NFyWDv5CjfwuzoCkw47Xf?si=0e1-5syyTgu9RsxnVuro9Q). by popular request, the full title playlist is [here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Yvy8m18OUxS7ua3in89Sc?si=KlZKHmMqTcKfPVa8aB1jLQ) and will update along with the story.

It's a Saturday night in Hogsmeade, the early spring weather the warmest it's been all year. In the orange light of the ancient cobblestone High Street there are scattered groups of people walking about, enjoying an evening stroll or gathered around The Three Broomsticks. Inside the pub is mainly students—Hogwarts, Durmstrang, and Beauxbatons alike—and the atmosphere is easy, comfortable, jovial.

Kim is in the centre of the packed dancefloor, her arms over Krum's shoulders. Right up against him, the energy more fun than sensual, even in the dim light with people dancing all around them.

"So where's Granger anyway?" Kim asks lowly, words slurring a bit as she runs a hand through her choppy hair. "Who we trying to make jealous?"

Krum leans in, hands gentle but steady on her waist. " _You_ vere needing to make someone jealous tonight, no?"

Kim frowns and meets his dark eyes. "Me?"

He inclines his head, bowing closer to her so there's but inches between their faces. "Trini. The, er— small, angry girl at the bar."

She only just resists the urge to turn around and look for Trini, instead managing a small tight smile. "She doesn't like me like that, unfortunately."

"Vhy not?" he asks, grinding down a little with his hips, pulling her in closer. "Her eyes say something different, I think."

"Yeah?" Kim mutters, matching his pace. And she knows he means it entirely friendly, but dancing with him like this is causing her body to respond in a way that's surprising—more instinctual than she's used to. It's certainly warm in here, with bodies up against her on all sides, and she knows her cheeks are a bit flushed with help from the drink.

Jason appears over Krum's shoulder and meets Kim's eyes, silently asking if she needs a rescue, and she flashes a warm placating smile in reply. Satisfied, he gives her a wolfish grin and drains his pint, allowing himself to be spun by Zack as they walk back towards the bar and out of sight.

"She seems reserved," Krum says quietly.

Kim nods, her forehead brushing his. "Yeah. But she's becoming one of my best friends. I can't..." she trails off, brow furrowing.

He hums, the deep sound reaching her ears underneath the white noise of the bar, like a ship horn on the sea. "This is reasonable. Vould you like to stop, then?"

"No way," she murmurs, shaking her head playfully and interlacing her fingers behind his neck. "Dance with me."

Krum tips back a little to meet her eyes. Smiles. "Of course."

.

Over at the bar, Trini drains the last quarter of her pint and orders another within a minute. She's drunk enough that the room is blurring at the edges, but Kim and Krum are clear in the centre of her vision, dancing in the middle of the crowd, bodies impossibly close.

And despite the instinct to keep her eyes on Kim, Trini has a greater urge to turn away, to spare herself from whatever it is that's presently clawing at her chest from the inside out. It's horribly uncomfortable, causing one of her hands to ball up into a fist where it rests on the bar, nails digging into her palm.

Her jaw flexes over and over as she focuses on watching Billy in her peripherals, on her right with his head bopping along to the music as he nurses his beer.

Zack and Jason soon appear on the borders of the crowd, faces flushed and smiling.

Trini meets Jason's eyes at once. "She okay?"

"Seems to be," he replies, ordering another couple beers for him and Zack.

Trini turns her head to take her eyes off of Kim proper, resting both elbows on the bar heavily and staring at the multitude of backlit glass bottles that line the wall. She can feel Zack's eyes on the side of her face, watching intently, but she doesn't acknowledge him.

A gentle _thwapthwapthwap_ sounds, paired with Summer sailing in on Trini's left to lean up against the bar. She shakes her pack of cigarettes again and jerks her head towards the door that leads out to the street. "You want?" she asks, eyes meeting Trini's in a different, deeper question.

Trini nods immediately. "Yeah." She looks between the boys. "I'll be back."

With that, she follows Summer out of The Three Broomsticks, weaving around the outside of the dancefloor and past the burly security wizard standing in the doorway, who gives them both a small jerk of the head in acknowledgement.

As the door opens they're greeted by the early spring night, a slight chill present in the air but not unpleasant. The wind has died down from the powerful gusts earlier this week; Trini finds herself content in her long sleeve shirt and dark jeans as they walk a bit to the right, joining the other people smoking in the quiet street.

Summer offers her a cigarette and Trini takes it, lighting Summer's before she does the same with her own. They both inhale and exhale slowly, thin streams of smoke exiting their lungs and escaping into the night.

They walk a bit away from the door, the music reaching their ears differently, more dulled, as if through water. Trini sighs and leans up against the side of the wooden building, tipping her head back.

"If you wanna talk," Summer mutters, eyes focused down the street on nowhere in particular.

"I know. Thanks."

"I'll also beat her up, if you want."

Trini chuckles, addressing the clear starry sky. "Keep offering and I'll start to think you really don't like her."

Summer shrugs. "You being wrecked is shit. I hate it."

"It's not her fault."

"Fuck if it's not."

"S—"

Summer huffs, taking another drag. "I know, I know. Can't make someone fancy you and all that. Gotta direct my rage somewhere, though."

"Fair, I guess," Trini mutters, closing her eyes and pausing for a few moments. " _God_ , how do I stop feeling like this?"

Summer hesitates. "I mean, you could snog someone else. I'm available."

Trini tips forward to shove her. "You're such an arse."

"I'd also be happy to wingman," Summer says airily, spinning once on the spot with her cigarette bobbing in her lips. "I've a mental list of like, five girls who've eyed you at House parties. I reckon a couple of them are here tonight."

Trini shakes her head, sighing heavily again. "Wanna know something funny? I thought I was doing a right cracking job with all of this up until a few minutes ago."

"You _are_ doing a good job, love," Summer insists quietly, stepping forward to put a hand on her forearm.

"Am I?" Trini mutters, running a hand through her hair and adjusting it over her shoulder, frustration leaking into her tone despite her efforts. "'Cause all I wanna do is leave right now. But I know if I'm alone in the bloody dorm I'm just gonna feel worse."

"Trini—"

"It's rubbish. I don't even know when it got this bad."

.

Meanwhile, and sequestered in a corner of the pub, Kim knocks back another shot as the Durmstrang kids cheer around her. Krum smiles wide and inclines his head, impressed.

Another Durmstrang guy—all dark hair and dark eyes, a few inches taller than Kim—is eyeing her, intentions entirely obvious. Kim pretends not to notice, high-fiving Krum when he offers and laughing sincerely.

She's chatting with Krum a couple minutes later when the same guy comes up beside her, tipping his body into hers and meeting her gaze with hazy eyes. "Vould you like to dance?"

And Kim considers it for the briefest of moments; he's _very_ good-looking, but she's not at all sober enough to be dancing with someone she doesn't know.

"Thanks," she replies, trying to inject warmth into her tone, "but I reckon I'll fall over if I try."

"I can steady you."

Kim puts her hand on his chest to push him back gently, shaking her head. "Really, thanks, but I'm gonna sit this one out—"

"Come on," he mutters, tipping back into her personal space, clearly a bit unsteady himself. "One dance?"

"Poliakoff," Krum says, voice stern. "She said no."

With a scoff, Poliakoff takes a step back from Kim and puts his hands up in a bit of a taunt. "How many vomen do you haff claim to in this pub?"

Krum moves between them, his back up against Kim's front. "My friend, you are drunk and acting foolish—"

"And _you_ do not know how to mind your own business, Viktor," Poliakoff mutters, leaning in closer. Krum puts a gentle hand on Kim's arm, urging her to back away. "She can speak for herself."

"But she already did?" Krum counters lowly, holding his ground and no longer sounding amicable. "She said no, and you did not listen. Apologise."

"You think that because you haff celebrity, you can tell me vhat to do?"

Another Durmstrang guy—bigger than both of them—steps up beside Krum. Glaring down at Poliakoff, he growls something in Bulgarian then switches to English, "You _vill_ apologise, Baran. She is a friend, and you disrespect her."

A tall brunette girl sidles up to Kim then, regarding her with a warm light in her eyes. "I am sorry about this."

Kim shakes her head quickly then does a double-take; the girl is _gorgeous_. "You know how guys can be."

Staring daggers at Baran, the girl makes a clicking noise with her tongue. "Nobody should make another feel uncomfortable. It is poor behaviour. He should know better."

The boys start arguing back and forth in rapid Bulgarian, voices not raised but clipped, and it's another minute (after two more Durmstrang guys step into the situation) before Baran breaks off from the group and approaches Kim.

He purses his lips and clears his throat, Krum and the others watching from a few feet away. "I, er, I am sorry. You refused and I did not listen." Glancing quickly to the girl at Kim's side, who's glaring with her arms crossed, he seems to recoil a bit. "I am a... proud man who is drunk and acting poorly—"

Before he can finish the girl reaches up and smacks him hard on the back of the head, muttering, "That sounded like an excuse. Try again, or I vill write mother."

Baran's eyes widen. "It vas not an excuse!" With a huff, his tone gets a bit warmer. "Truly, Kim, I apologise. It is only veak men who disrespect vomen, and I acted out of order. May I buy you a drink, as a friend?"

The girl holds a hand out, eyebrow raised, and he stares at her before fishing in his pocket and placing some coins there gently, chastised. She looks to Kim kindly. "Shall ve get you another, then?"

Kim chuckles and nods at Baran. "Apology accepted."

Inclining his head, he backs away, and the girl takes Kim's hand and pulls her into the crowd of people, winding through open spaces and soon arriving at the bar. She leans up against it on one elbow, grimacing. "I really am sorry. I know it does not matter, but I haff never seen him act like that."

"Appreciate it," Kim returns. "But he doesn't have to buy me a drink, it's alright—"

"Nonsense," the girl interjects, squeezing Kim's hand where it rests on the bar. "Get vhatever you vould like." She pauses before turning her body towards Kim a little more. "And I'm Zehra, by the vay."

Kim sighs lightly, acquiescing. "Kim. I'll have what you're having."

Zehra nods with a warm twinkle in her eye, tapping her foot to the house band's music. With a smile, Kim tips a bit into her—a familiarity made easy by the alcohol running through both of their systems—and spots Billy on the other side of the L-shaped bar.

"Hey, B!"

He looks around for a moment before he sees her. Flashing a brilliant grin, he elbows Jason next to him, who lights up. They both come over, looking curiously at Zehra.

"Zehra," Kim starts, gesturing to them with her free hand, "meet Billy and Jason. They're good friends of mine."

"Pleasure," Zehra says.

"We're pleased to make your acquaintance," Billy returns, and Jason gives a small smile in agreement, looking between them with calculating eyes as he sips on his drink.

Kim hums. "What're you getting?"

"Vodka cran, I figure?" Zehra nods at Madam Rosmerta, who starts walking over. "You still vant the same?"

"Please," Kim mutters, then jerks her head at the boys. "Where's the rest of the gang?"

Something different, though subdued, flashes in Jason's eyes before he looks around, his movements the slightest bit stiffer than before. "Zack's close somewhere with Tom and the others. Trini's still outside—"

Kim's ears perk up. "Outside? Is she okay?"

Jason nods quickly. "Summer's with her." He doesn't offer any more information, and Kim's about to turn to make for the door when he puts his hand on her forearm. "She's fine, K."

Zehra pivots away from the bar to hand Kim her drink. "Outside, you say? I vas about to go — do you smoke?"

And Kim doesn't, unless she's _very_ drunk, but she's quite past that threshold by her estimation. "Sure. Could I bum one? I'll buy your next round."

"Do not vorry," Zehra replies, waving her hand. "My brother vill buy our next round." She looks to Billy and Jason in question. "Care to join us?"

Jason shrugs, peering at Billy, who does the same in reply. "I mean, sure." He pats the breast pocket of his flannel button-up shirt. "I've got something a bit stronger, if you'd like to partake."

Zehra gives Jason a mischievous smile as she starts to lead the way towards the door. "Your friends are lovely, Kim."

Kim chuckles. "Don't I know it."

They weave back through the busy pub and make their way out into the street, the gentle early spring breeze playing with Kim's hair as they step outside. She immediately looks around for Trini, squinting a little with help from the ancient orange streetlamps, and finds her leaning up against the side of the pub with Summer, chatting and laughing.

Some Durmstrang kids cheers Zehra happily as they come out, smiling wide, and she spins around goofily and takes a long sip of her drink. Billy spots Trini, too, immediately making a beeline over.

Jason stays next to Kim and Zehra as they all walk a bit further into the street, fishing a little plastic bag out of his breast pocket and popping a skinny marijuana joint into his mouth. Zehra produces a long thin cigarette and steps up close light it, cupping her hands around Kim's mouth.

And a little spark of attraction runs up Kim's spine, noting how Zehra's hand lingers on hers and holds, casually interlacing their fingers again. Zehra exhales smoke into the night, drink and cigarette held in the same hand, elegant and face half-lit by the streetlight.

Kim shakes her head at herself, the movement nearly indiscernible, as she takes a drag of her own.

Jason lights his joint, inhaling in a soft _hiss_ and holding it in his lungs. He jerks his head at Kim and the three of them make their way over to Billy, Trini, and Summer, who are chatting away.

"'Lo, lads," Jason greets. And Trini, clearly as drunk as Kim is, skips over a little and pecks him on the cheek, keeping her hand on his face fondly before stepping back again.

Billy takes the joint from Jason and puffs on it, closing his eyes and smiling. Kim takes a long pull of her drink, sucking a small ice cube into her mouth and crunching it; all at once wanting to do anything but look at Trini.

But Kim's gaze lands on her anyway—finding Trini looking right back at her with an easy, hazy camaraderie, leaning into Summer's shoulder.

"Hey," Trini says lowly, not taking her eyes off Kim. She steps forward and holds out a hand to Zehra, flashing a quick smile. "I'm Trini, nice to meet you."

Zehra puts her drink on the ground and holds her cigarette in her lips, extending her hand and still keeping hold of Kim's. "Zehra. I go to Durmstrang."

"Our Kim makes fast friends," Summer mutters, with something else in her eyes.

"Seems so," Zehra replies easily, accepting the joint from Jason when he offers. "Thank you, Jason."

She inhales and nods approvingly, making to hand it back to him, but he gestures towards Trini, who takes it with thanks.

And as Trini inhales, still watching Kim through a swirling puff of smoke, Kim feels her heart stumble a bit, like it's just tripped up on a casual drunken stroll through town. The feeling is so much more than the gentle, giddy sensation of having a beautiful girl like Zehra around; it's halting, igniting.

They continue to pass the joint between them, Kim taking a couple puffs and soon feeling pleasantly adrift. It's a happy kind of high, making her feel much braver than usual as she stands there, sipping her drink down to bare ice.

Zehra chats with the five of them, laughing and joking with ease, and once the joint is done Jason nods towards the door. "Shall we, all?" His clouded gaze lingers on Trini, who nods.

They step back towards the entrance threshold and Zehra squeezes Kim's hand, pulling her a few feet off to the side. "I am just going to have a chat vith this lot," she says lowly, jerking her head at the Durmstrang group, who are still smoking and talking. "I vill see you inside?"

Kim inclines her head, certain she's blushing more than she was earlier. It's surely unnoticeable in the dark, so she tries not to pay it any mind. "Sure. Let me buy you that round?"

Zehra smiles. "You're stubborn."

Kim drops her hand playfully, starting to back up. Shrugs. "That's what people tell me. See you."

Zehra gives her a wave and Kim turns around, making her way back into The Three Broomsticks. As soon as she steps in she's buffeted by a wall of warm, happy noise, people moving about faster than her eyes can track. But Jason is standing there waiting just inside the door, and he slings an arm over her shoulders as they weave back through the crowd, finding Trini and Billy dancing along to the house band's cover of Chuck Berry's ['Johnny B. Goode'](https://open.spotify.com/track/2QfiRTz5Yc8DdShCxG1tB2?si=c-F5klQWR4qVW4JsTocemg) with Zack, Tommy, Summer, Sky, and Rocky.

Tommy squeals and careens right into Kim, wrapping her arms around her waist and hoisting her off her feet in a giant hug. "Hey Kimcam."

Smiling wide, Kim kisses her cheek in reply.

And as soon as Tommy starts grinding on her along to the jaunty beat of the song, Jason shimmies in from the back, sandwiching Kim between them. Kim laughs loudly, eyes crinkling at the sides as they dance together, getting goofier by the second.

They all go through a couple more songs like that before Trini announces that she's going to the bathroom.

"I'll come with," Kim says at once, lurching forward and grabbing her hand in the most casual way she can manage. "Buddy system."

Trini rolls her eyes but doesn't drop Kim's hand, leading them through to the back, walking a bit unsteady into the narrow corridor where there's a small queue for the girls loo. She turns around to face Kim with an eyebrow quirked, a bright haze in her eyes, and steps back into a small dark recessed alcove to wait.

Back up against the wall, Trini watches her with something in her expression that Kim can't place; never able to quite clock her in times like this. But they're close—a mere couple feet apart—when someone goes to get by behind Kim in the narrow corridor and Trini grabs her waist gently, pulling her in to allow the person through.

And just like that Kim's right up against Trini, hand braced on the smooth wood wall to steady herself. It's reminiscent of their position crammed together in the Entrance Hall caretaker's cupboard a couple months ago; certainly braver tonight on account of the intoxication, Kim relaxes her posture but doesn't make to move back, eyes adjusting to the darkness of their little spot away from everything, time slowing down to zero in on just the two of them.

Trini searches her eyes, looking at ease. "Having a good night?"

Kim tilts her head. "Would be better if I saw you more."

_Oops._

Internally, she tries to slap FuckBi Kim back into the part of her brain reserved for hellions. And it's doubtful it'll take, given she's mostly focused on continuing to hold Trini's gaze.

For her part, Trini seems amused. "Would it?"

"Yeah."

"Well, you're a popular person," Trini quips, shifting her weight backward slightly. "I'm always close by."

Kim hums. "Not close enough, I reckon."

"No?" Trini mutters, eyes different all at once. Bewildered, maybe. She smirks, the corner of her mouth ticking up. "This isn't close enough for you?"

"Not in the slightest."

Trini blinks slowly, brow twitching. "Then come closer."

_Oh._

They're _already_ quite close, to be sure—and those aren't exactly the last words Kim expected from Trini in this scenario, barely audible through an exhale, but the resulting surprise causes FuckBi Kim to be _launched_ away from her conscious mind and into the ether with enough force to be considered concussive in most academic circles.

Unable to come up with a witty reply, Kim finds herself frozen for a few moments before she manages to inch forward gently. Like moving too fast could tip everything off its precarious axis.

In the space of a heartbeat, she's resting her forehead against Trini's.

There's a pause for what seems like minutes, though it can't be more than a few seconds. "How about now, drunky?" Trini asks, a bright smile in her voice as it ghosts Kim's lips.

And of _course_ that's all this is to Trini—just them goofing around, her humouring some presumed drunken cuddle instinct on Kim's part.

But Kim's slurred words are stuck in the base of her throat, no longer smooth enough to make it to her tongue, lodged somewhere near her racing heart. The combined noise of the pub patrons and house band falls away, and her head is full of nothing but the buzzing energy that's _always_ been there between them, humming and warm—surely enough of a song to sing and dance to for the rest of her life.

She feels Trini's smile fade as the seconds pass; the air becomes heavier as the playfulness between them seems to evaporate. They stand there breathing against one another but Kim can't speak, still unable to muster any type of response.

Trini's brow twitches again, waiting for Kim to answer.

_You can't do this. You're in too deep, back off._

Kim squeezes her eyes shut and her jaw flexes, taking a tiny steadying breath in and out. Afraid to move, to say anything; afraid to break whatever spell they're under, for the moment to fall away—

"Do you wanna dance with me?" Trini whispers, all mirth gone from her tone. She says it like she's admitting a secret, squeezing Kim's hip gently as if to check if she's still with her.

After a few seconds Kim nuzzles her forehead gently into Trini's in affirmation. "Yeah," she breathes back, finally finding her voice.

Trini lets out a content sigh, like coming home after a long day. "Okay."

There's another pause before someone squeezes by behind Kim again—not roughly enough to jostle too much, but causing her to tip just the _slightest_ bit closer.

Just enough...

And Kim and Trini's noses brush together, just once.

Trini's breath hitches at the brief contact, chest halting its rise and fall. And if Kim's pulse wasn't thrumming a steady beat in her ears she might just believe that the clocks had stopped altogether, leaving the two of them standing there pressed up against one another, every nerve singing, electrified; a euphoria unlike _anything_ Kim's ever experienced spreading from the tip of her nose down to her toes. 

Because everything is somehow still, in the thrall of something hypnotic. Warm and steady as long as they're touching.

Until Trini _tilts her head up_ and their noses brush together again, seemingly seeking Kim with her eyes closed, grip tightening on her hips like a reflex; as if everything, _everything_ could be laid out between them in the space of a shallow breath, cards on the table—

And Kim knows she shouldn't reach out, shouldn't cradle it in her hands, shouldn't hold on—

But Trini's breath is hot on her lips, a fevered apparition in the dark, and maybe Kim really doesn't fucking _care_ about the realities of tomorrow—

Right now she could chance it, she could just tilt her head down and—

"Are you two waiting?" someone asks from behind them, the sound reaching Kim's ears as if arriving from far away. It stings like a slap to the face, her recklessness abating as if it had never reared its head.

Kim briefly attempts to steady herself before nuzzling her forehead into Trini's gently again; not jumping backwards but forcing herself to pull away, wanting to shout at the person for interrupting but also incapable of expressing just how _grateful_ she is.

"We are, yeah," Kim answers over her shoulder, stepping back proper and taking Trini's hand, towing her carefully towards the bathroom door.

The queue has dwindled and Trini squeezes her hand before dropping it, going into a stall without having to wait any longer, glancing back at Kim as she shuts the door.

With her mind whirring, Kim lets out a shaky breath and steps up to a vacant sink. She washes her hands and checks her reflection in the cloudy mirror, running her fingers through her hair a few times as a gaggle of girls chats a few feet away in breezy French accents.

Her eyes are having a rough time focusing, but she's too drunk for any proper Dark Thoughts to bother her much, which is a plus.

"You look, like, fit as hell," says one of the girls a couple sinks down—voice slurred, insistent, and remarkably sincere in the way only a drunk girl in a pub bathroom could be. She glances over at Kim out of the corner of her eye with a waggle of her eyebrows as she reapplies her lipstick.

"Thanks," Kim replies easily. "Same goes. Love that shade on you."

Without hesitation, the girl holds the lipstick out. "Wanna try?"

Kim manages a chuckle. "You're sweet, but I'm too much of a mess tonight."

"Aren't we all," says one of the other girls, eyes glassy and leaning against the wall with a lit cigarette between her lips, sporting a black leather jacket over a tucked-in white t-shirt and black skinny jeans.

Kim raises an eyebrow as she takes a couple steps towards the door. "Whatever you say, but the Danny Zuko vibe you've got going is pure class," she returns, gesturing vaguely. The girl winks, and Kim shares a small smile with the other girl at the sink before backing out of the bathroom.

She crosses the dim narrow corridor to wait, tipping her head back against the wall. Thoughts still racing, she takes a few deep breaths in and out, trying to calm her thundering heartbeat and pull herself together.

Trini emerges a minute later, drying her hands on her jeans. She smiles a bit hesitantly and Kim does her best to brighten up at once, holding her hand out like a goofy idiot and skipping a little as Trini takes it.

Kim leads the way back out into the pub proper, where the house band is midway through ['Hey Jude'](https://open.spotify.com/track/0aym2LBJBk9DAYuHHutrIl?si=WjW8unmuQS6O4WHP92GPgw) by The Beatles.

"' _Remember to let her under your skin, then you'll begin to make it better..._ '"

Trailing behind, Trini thrusts her free hand into the air and joins the rest of the people in the pub shout-singing in crescendo—

"' _Better, better, beTTER, BETTER, BETTER, WHOAAAAA_!'"

Kim does too, consciously letting the atmosphere fill her up. She's grinning within moments, and they bound in to find their friends in the middle of the crowd, Hogwarts and Durmstrang and Beauxbatons all there shoulder-to-shoulder, throwing their heads back to belt along—

"' _NAAAA, NA, NA, NANANANA. NANANANA HEY JUDE_...'"

"' _NAAAA, NA, NA, NANANANA! NANANANA HEY JUDE.._.'"

Now _beaming_ , Kim and Trini barely look away from one another.

And Kim finds herself thinking that it might be enough, to just be with Trini like this—here, surrounded by their friends in a place they love, with a song sending goosebumps skating over their skin; somehow in the presence of an elation so profound that it's anchoring, buoying, and unmooring all at once.

Trini raises their interlinked hands and twirls Kim on the spot, laughing, and Zack tips down to say something to her underneath all the noise.

Five seconds later he's hoisted an absolutely _delighted_ Trini onto his shoulders, the two of them shout-singing triumphantly along with Kim, Jason, Billy, Tommy, and the rest of the pub as the song gets more and more boisterous.

And as Zack starts bouncing Trini toward the rowdy end, her head thrown back, hands waving up to the ceiling, people all around them rapidly begin slinging their arms over each other's shoulders, friends and acquaintances and strangers;

With Kim's own voice cracking from how loud she's singing along, she tries to etch it all into her mind.

It really might be enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title track is 'delicate' by taylor swift.
> 
> danny zuko = john travolta in Grease. fun fact, that line's literally a riff on something an angel of a drunk girl said to me in a pub once. I was FLATTERED AF.
> 
> \---
> 
> HELLO!
> 
> SO THERE'S THE TENSION I PROMISED! WHAT'D YA THINK?
> 
> (this is FOR REAL THEIR FIRST PROPER TENSE MOMENT in terms of physical chemistry ok! IT IS A BIG DEAL!)
> 
> so yes, here we are in hogsmeade. canon trip! more lively than last time cause this trip's the final one. usually there'd be 4ish per school year, but with the tournament it's 3. so this is the last Big Party that all the diff schools get to have together. it's wholesome!
> 
> our ranger kids are having a nice time, but trini soon finds herself with some MAJOR jealousy. cause reminder, she doesnt know that kim and krum are platonic. despite krum/hermione clearly having a Thing going on, trini sees kim dancing with someone else and is like OH NO. tbh, even if she KNEW it was platonic she might've Got Like That—feelings are complicated.
> 
> and then we have summer being her amazing self, trying to lighten trini's mood while being very protective. that's how she is, and in a few chapters we're gonna see her gear up with it.
> 
> zehra + baran poliakoff are twins. reminder that it was only the GoF film that portrayed durmstrang and beauxbatons as single-gender schools. in the books they're co-ed. with kim + krum being pals, it makes sense she'd meet more of them! and sidebar RE baran's behaviour, to the boys especially in the audience: do what krum + the other durmstrang guys did! shut that shit down, even if your friends're the ones acting like fools! no means no dudes.
> 
> but yes. kim was with the rangers for the majority of the night, but krum asked her to dance! so she's not actively avoiding them or anything, dont worry. also note as SOON as kim's not with their little group, trini goes RIGHT into that jealous headspace. that's why she says to summer that she THOUGHT she was doing okay with the whole Kim Crush. remember how she felt when terence asked kim to dance at the yule ball? this is like that but MUCH worse. cause they're closer now, right.
> 
> the thing with trini is that she deals with own feelings largely by trying to push them away. you know those little jokes she makes internally about hauling the Gay Part of her brain off? that's partially because it's a very REAL technique she uses—actively banishing her general Vulnerable Feels away. this is a core characterisation thing but it ALSO def includes the Gay Feels, borne out of that smidge of internalised homophobia she mentioned in ch 16. 
> 
> again though, the wizarding world is canonically much better with queer stuff than the muggle world! I must stress again that this isn't a Being Queer Is A Sad Time story. but trini was raised mainly in the muggle community, remember. so as we see here, with alcohol in the mix, all those built up walls around her Gay Feels evaporate, and it HITS HER in full force.
> 
> but yes, the close quarters bit between kim and trini is partially a callback to ch 47 where they're running from filch and get stuck in a cupboard. it's a progression, right—before, it was tense but not _as_ Charged. this here, where more time has passed and they've both been drinking/smoking, is DIFFERENT.
> 
> reminder! that! this! is! A SLOW BURN! the most slow burn to ever burn. a tyre fire. that type of shit. I'm gonna keep saying this. so DON'T BE MAD AT ME CAUSE THEY DIDN'T KISS PLEASE! AIN'T IN THE CARDS!
> 
> the thing about this interaction is that there's very clearly both romantic and physical chemistry between trini/kim, right? but they're at the point in their friendship where they're slowly becoming best friends, so not wanting to throw a bomb into that makes SENSE. note too that kim doesnt Like Herself—she thinks trini deserves way better (tho that doesnt stop her from flirting, especially initially). and trini clearly thinks kim'd never consider her that way, per her talk with zack in ch 49.
> 
> so all that prior thinking + this interaction happening while intoxicated with the Hazy Memory Effect = there'll be a lot of rationalising for both of them after the fact, in terms of trying to explain away what happened.
> 
> alas, the horrors of mutual pining. but that's how it is!
> 
> added that little trope of 'someone interrupts an almost kiss' for some unrestrained summer fun and to torture you all + myself. ur welcome. (it's a shooting star! don't expect to see it again anytime soon lads!)
> 
> but yes I've been Very Excited to share this chapter with you all! I sincerely hope you liked it!
> 
> \---
> 
> as always, I can't thank you all enough for continuing to read this story. I adore every single one of you. thanks for taking the time to comment when you can as well, it brightens my day more than I can express. please take care of yourselves, and until next time! <3


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